Quote from: Gabriela on March 18, 2019, 09:58:08 AM@Gabriela
Hello to everyone. My name is Gabriela. I'm from Chile and I want to participate on this community that it have been helpful to me when I started to research what is happening to me.
I came out recently as a transgender woman, but just to my therapist. The past few months it have been hard to admit things to me and to my therapist. Moving from complete shame (for wearing woman's clothes when i'm alone) to loving myself and recognise that i'm a woman.
One week after I went for the first time to my therapist, I told to my wife that I had some "transgender issues" (I didn't know well my condition back then or what was happening to me) and she dind't take it very well (We've been together over 10 years, 3 years married). However, months have passed and she is still with me because I didn't take it too far, but now I want to tell her that I have to transition and become a woman, that I'm transgender woman. I getting depressed every day living as someone who i'm not, but I'm too afraid of her reaction, of her tears, of her pain. I want to be with her forever but I know that she won't be with me if I transition. Now, I focus on getting the strength to be able to tell her how I feel and hope for the best outcome.
That's the short version story. I hope to participate on this forum and get to know you all.
By the way, sorry for my english, I'm a spanish speaker!!
Greetings!
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Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on March 18, 2019, 11:15:53 AMThank you Alaskan Danielle!! and I will look into de links :)
@Gabriela
Dear Gabriela:
I am so very glad that you have become a member here and that you found the Susan's Place Forums.
As you continue to post on the forums you will be able to exchange thoughts and comments with others that are experiencing many of the same things that you are. I expect that you will be getting many members offering their thoughts and suggestions as you continue to post here.
This is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say that may have been in your circumstances and with your questions and concerns.
There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation and as you continue to feel free to share with all of us.
I also want to warmly WELCOME you to Susan's Place.
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.
As you are certainly aware you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members. When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. ....
***There is a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new like-minded friends here.
Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace.
I have attached important and informative LINKS that will help you to navigate around the Forums and will allow you to enjoy the features here.
Please look closely at the LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.
Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle
Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that all new members should be familiar with:
Things that you should read
Quote from: Gabriela on March 18, 2019, 09:58:08 AM
Hello to everyone. My name is Gabriela. I'm from Chile and I want to participate on this community that it have been helpful to me when I started to research what is happening to me.
I came out recently as a transgender woman, but just to my therapist. The past few months it have been hard to admit things to me and to my therapist. Moving from complete shame (for wearing woman's clothes when i'm alone) to loving myself and recognise that i'm a woman.
One week after I went for the first time to my therapist, I told to my wife that I had some "transgender issues" (I didn't know well my condition back then or what was happening to me) and she dind't take it very well (We've been together over 10 years, 3 years married). However, months have passed and she is still with me because I didn't take it too far, but now I want to tell her that I have to transition and become a woman, that I'm transgender woman. I getting depressed every day living as someone who i'm not, but I'm too afraid of her reaction, of her tears, of her pain. I want to be with her forever but I know that she won't be with me if I transition. Now, I focus on getting the strength to be able to tell her how I feel and hope for the best outcome.
That's the short version story. I hope to participate on this forum and get to know you all.
By the way, sorry for my english, I'm a spanish speaker!!
Greetings!
Quote from: Tribble on March 18, 2019, 12:20:27 PM
Hi Gabriela! Beautiful name. :)
I've always had a crush on Renee O'Connor, Gabriel from Xena. :icon_redface:
Shame is a huge part of a lot of our stories and can be difficult to overcome. I hope your therapist is sympathetic and is able to help you deal with those feelings.
Spouses and families are always difficult to predict when it comes to something like this. I've read stories of spouses being apprehensive or even repulsed in the beginning and eventually turning around once seeing how happy their partner has become, but each journey and each relationship is different. I'm afraid that there don't seem to be any predictors to help you with that, so a good therapist is a must.
Your English is certainly better than my Spanish and I had 10 years of Spanish classes! I've retained almost none of it.
Quote from: V M on March 18, 2019, 01:37:00 PMThank you V M! I will enjoy it!
Hi Gabriela :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's Place :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Hugs
V M
Quote from: MarshaJoy825 on March 18, 2019, 05:19:35 PMThank you Marsha! I'm here because I like this forum, i was able to read a lot of stories and relate with a lot of them. Sadly I couldn't find something similar in spanish but I'm glad that's not a impediment to find a place like this.
Hello Gabriela,
What courage for you to come here and write in English. You write very well. Please don't apologize for your English. I totally understand about your wife. It is quite the difficult place to be. We want to stay with our wives, but we feel a great need to be our real self. I do hope things do work out for you. This is a great place to be. If you ever need someone to chat with please feel free to PM me. You can write in Spanish (I can read it pretty well) but I will answer in English if that works for you. Hugs, Marsha
Quote from: LizK on March 19, 2019, 04:55:49 AM
Hi Gabriela
Welcome to Susan's, Hope you enjoy your time here :icon_wave-nerd:
There are lots of great people with valuable experiences and only too happy to share them with you.
Take care ;D
LizK
Quote from: Sabrina Rei on March 19, 2019, 08:17:02 AMSabrina! love your name!, and I really want that my transition doesn't affect my relationship in any bad way. Thank you for your wishes!.
It's awesome that you're ready to share your journey with all of us here. my wife has known about me being transgender for almost ten years now though the severity of it was only revealed a little bit at a time. I know it's hard to have that conversation and it doesn't always go how we hope but it seems like you've done everything right so far. You'll find a lot of other women here have had the same experience. I certainly learned from them how to best brash the topic of transition after having botched it so badly on my own the first time. Wishing you the best!