There seems to be a lot of disagreement and hypersensitivity within our community. Hell, we can't even agree on an umbrella term to identify the community.
"I'm not transgender, I am a woman so I don't identify as transgender and I am offended by referring to me in that way"
"Okay. So why are you here? Family, friend, SO?"
"And why did you think that reference included you?"
YIKES! It's a hotbed of controversy. It's enough to make anyone nuts.
And then there's "stealth". Talk about throwing reason out the window! Post a thread on stealth and watch the phone lines light up. It's worse than politics and religion. Imagine what the visitor, hoping to understand us, thinks when they peek inside. "They're all crazy!" And we want to remove GID from the DSM?
Whenever we enter into a discussion or sharing of opinions we have a responsibility to the group and to ourselves to act reasonably. Don't make assumptions. Avoid bringing your own stuff into a discussion and project it where it doesn't belong. Unless you are singled out, if you're taking something personally, it's probably you pointing the finger at you, not them.
If you don't like the way a discussion is going and your emotions are boiling, walk away. Unless you're the boss, ripping someone's head off won't get people to listen to you but it will probably tick a lot of people off. And if you don't respect the people in the discussion, ask yourself why you are even there. Being in a group of people you don't respect serves no useful purpose. Go find people you do respect and interact with them.
When in doubt, ask. Trying to understand the life, the perspective and the intent of someone simply through the written word is extremely difficult, even if you think you know them. Few messages written are stated so clearly there's no way it can be misinterpreted. Accept this and give the person you are responding to the benefit of a doubt.
There are people here from all over the world. There are people here from every walk of life. There is a wide range in age and an even wider range of life experiences. No one has all the answers but collectively we can get close. Don't discount what someone says because you can't understand his or her perspective. Open your mind and accept or reject it but don't criticize it. "When you're green you're growin', when you're not you rot."
Everyone here has a chance to benefit from the collective experience, knowledge and wisdom we offer as a group. How you benefit is up to you.
Julie
Thank you Julie Marie, it was necessary to say. This is a support community, not an argument board, and it's our responsibility to help each other out, not hurt each other's feelings. Especially when we have new members coming here for support, many are just beginning their journeys and need this support. I know I did when I first came here. So let us try to get along well here and make a positive environment for other members.
Much needed post. It's so easy to offend people here, it's ridiculous. (This is not meant as offensive or targeting anyone in specific.)
That is my thoughts exactly. We are here FOR each other, not AGAINST.
And the new ones will leave like rats from a sinking ship. And that helps no one.
Janet
I'm glad you said it. Opinions are fine but bickering isn't necessary. It has been said many times before, these are support boards. Even not taking that into consideration, why would anyone enjoy arguing?
Julie,
A very well timed and needed post. Too often we are splitting words and arguing over "what is, is".
As you told me to write,
"honey you are so darn smart- no wonder I married you"! :D
Ahem...while I align completely with the sentiment, my only comment (other than this prelude) is:
You cannot reason with the unreasonable.
Thank you, Julie. It seems every so often we need a post like this one.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fganjataz.com%2F01smileys%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2FloopyBlonde-blinking.gif&hash=4545ddf8251cf9c32ae6074d56e48bc34a755857)Kristi
Thanks, Julie. It's reassuring to see this - I've been spending a lot less time here due to all the nastiness I've seen.
All exactly how I feel. The hate I've seen recently has shocked me. And you don't want to shock the trained, we don't run off.
Now of course its a bunch, no actually a few, keyboard cowboys trying to stir up divisiveness because for some reason they feel bad about themselves. They're normally as limp as noodles and as harmless away from their modems, but sadly I can see 'em on another Internet site coming up with, or egging on, anti T sentiments, or out on the street or in a bar, in a group where they feel safe, egging on taunts or worst toward a T individual.
And I'm the kind of person who doesn't put up with that, and it gets me hated but I don't care. I will stand with the person being picked on, here, on other sites, or on the street. I have always been the person to do that, it goes way back to grade school.
This site has to be open and welcoming to everyone, friendly to those who need help and community and UNFRIENDLY to jerks.
Thank you for the post Julie, :icon_flower:
Like others have said, I can only hope a few of the people who need to read it..do... ;)
..but like others here, I also tend to think the anarchists will look the other way.. ::)
To support the moderators here, it is down to the whole community to make the extra effort not rise to the taunting, and post with care and consideration at these times. We also as a community need to show support for those under attack without engaging in or fuelling the argument. ;)
With time those who make themselves feel better by degrading others will get bored and leave...
:icon_hug:
Chrissty
weel said julie
Hostility and negativity aren't conducive to a supportive environment. It happens that you have to practice a touch of tough love with people, but that doesn't mean you get to be rude about it.
Well said hon.
Quote from: Julie Marie on October 15, 2009, 09:26:16 PM
There seems to be a lot of disagreement and hypersensitivity within our community. Hell, we can't even agree on an umbrella term to identify the community.
We AGREE to disagree, only in diversity do ALL learn acceptance, lol why should I think myself any different than anybody else when *stealth* is the only really effective way to indeed disassociate myself and thus openly contribute to a more general sense of tolerance!
Savvy?
Quote from: Kiera on October 17, 2009, 05:06:40 AM
We AGREE to disagree, only in diversity do ALL learn acceptance, lol why should I think myself any different than anybody else when *stealth* is the only really effective way to indeed disassociate myself and thus openly contribute to a more general sense of tolerance!
Savvy?
I Agree.
I've only just read this but I sooo agree with all of this.
I love it when someone shows me a new way of looking at things and as I often say to people I'll answer to anything that anyone chooses to call me as long as it isn't rude.
Life is simply too short to worry about or get offended by other peoples experiences and perceptions. Better to agree to disagree and walk away as friends.
Oh - and if I ever do accidentally upset any of you please don't ignore me - just tell me and I will willingly apologise because your friendship is worth more to me than winning an arguement.
I so agree with you, Jenny. Call me what you want, as long as you don't call me late to a BBQ.
Janet
Great to have a thread like this one because we do come from a variety of backgrounds, and therefore, not everyone knows how to conduct themselves on the 'net in a way that tends to come across as respectful to others.
I'm going to add a little by bringing in specific guidelines used in online (graduate level) courses I've taken. The idea is to explain specifically how to express oneself professionally, with consideration to that fact that students aren't expected to know these things in advance because they come from different backgrounds.
1) The difference between debate (which is productive) and bickering (which is counter-productive) basically rests on whether you criticize the statement being made or the person making it. Try to avoid singling anyone out or saying anything that could be interpreted as a personal criticism. Instead, it's best to reply to a statement you disagree with with something along the lines of, "I disagree with this. My personal experiences and / or what I have read indicate otherwise," and elaborate with facts gleaned from your own life, not assumptions about their life.
2) In keeping with the above, I think it's often best to avoid use of the second person and generalizations in any context where it would be equally effective to simply speak for yourself. For example, "In a similar situation, I did ____ because this is my take on the subject . . . " instead of, "You should ____ !" or "People in that kind of situation are ____ , so they should ____ ."
3) Whenever you have the time or energy to find articles or similar resources to back up what you're saying in a debate, do so. This helps others to educate themselves and it shows that you are simply making a statement based on information that you find useful, not attacking or criticizing anyone.
Not from my online classes but just from my experience with forums in general:
- If one finds a particular member's posts to be bothersome in any way, it is possible to simply make a habit of choosing not to read them. I've noticed that sometimes, people forget this and may, as a result, make enemies when this could have been avoided.
- It is possible to be supportive and disagree with someone at the same time. One can always say, "I, personally, wouldn't ____ because of _____ , but I recognize that it's a challenging situation and I wish you the best of luck with it."
I think polite debate is a good thing because it often causes people to think about things they wouldn't have otherwise, and hence make better-informed decisions. But I think it's important to think of a response to a debate-type topic as "offering a different perspective", as opposed to "promoting your own beliefs".
Thanks for posting this Julie. And thanks for the addendum, Alex.
Like Jenny, if I offend anyone please tell me so that I may learn not to do that again.
The other moderators here run a pretty fair place where I always feel safe. (And I try to do my part, too.) There were times, especially early on, when I would get insulted and back away. But we have a lot to offer each other. Being trans - or whatever you want to call it - or dealing with a trans significant other is tough and is a lot tougher if we can't rely on each other. If you find a post out of line, report it to the moderators.
- Kate
Quote from: Alexmakenoise on February 21, 2010, 12:35:41 PM
1) The difference between debate (which is productive) and bickering (which is counter-productive) basically rests on whether you criticize the statement being made or the person making it. Try to avoid singling anyone out or saying anything that could be interpreted as a personal criticism. Instead, it's best to reply to a statement you disagree with with something along the lines of, "I disagree with this. My personal experiences and / or what I have read indicate otherwise," and elaborate with facts gleaned from your own life, not assumptions about their life.
Well put. It reminds me of the Oscar Wilde quote, "If you cannot prove a man wrong, don't panic. You can always call him names."
QuoteIf you find a post out of line, report it to the moderators.
The internet is supposed to be open to freedom of expression. But this forum apparently isn't. :(
I value freedom of expression - but when expression doesn't take others into consideration, then it's not really free, since someone is still being made to pay.
I think all that's being expected here on this forum is that we're considerate of each other, which I think should be a minimum expectation on any forum. If someone complains to a moderator about someone else's post, the moderator (thank goodness!) will show common sense about whether to act on it or not (I speak as someone who occasionally shoots first and asks questions later, and then needs to take back the bullet ::)).
Quote from: jodi on March 30, 2011, 07:38:34 AM
The internet is supposed to be open to freedom of expression. But this forum apparently isn't. :(
This site is open to freedom of expression within responsible limits. If you can't be responsible in your expression, then you will be asked to leave.
The internet is free to use but each site is paid for by somebody. This forum is hosted and maintained and brought to you by Susan. She sets the rules (look here (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)). The staff enforces Susan's rules.
The rules established for this site encourage open dialogue, the exchange of information, and support for one another. We try to prevent people from disrupting that and sending the discussions into invective, argument, and chaos because then the forum would no longer be useful.
You are free to express your opinions here. We only ask that you do it with consideration for others.
- Kate
If limits then no longer has freedom, when you have rules, those who has the say [in the rules] tends to have double standards, even taking things personally, with prejudice.
I will stop the discussion here otherwise I will get ban.
Jodi, with respect that makes me think of someone saying that removing our right to shoot each other limits our freedom or something else along those lines. The rules seem to be in place to keep us from unintentionally hurting the other members of the forum, and I think that if you hang out for a bit you'll see that the moderators aren't exactly expression Nazis. A wide range of views are shared in this forum, and you're definitely welcome to express yours as well.
I am so clueless...so please let me know if I am pissing you off ... I am totally miss things and don't want to unintentionally hurt someone's feeling.
I know when I first stated posting that some of my stuff had to be changes cause I was using terms that was offensive to other -- I didn't know I was so new to being trans -- and I appreciated that it was done so people didn't think I was a total jerk.
Lee, I have been there, in other similar regulated forum, being banned for posting something which in my common sense is mild, reasonable, and intellectual response, just because a certain moderator does not like it.
If instead of being ban, these moderator were given power of detaining someone for saying something they don't like, then it is no difference to some undemocratic government who will state there is freedom of speech within a limit.
However to equate removing our right to shoot each other limits our freedom, to freedom of speech in a forum being hindered by rules, is inappropriate if you consider the harm / benefit. There is no physical harm possible by not limited freedom of speech in an online forum.
"Over protecting" someone who is communicating in an online forum, is in fact to handicap them, preventing them the opportunity for intellectual growth.
A regulated forum is limiting the possibility for fair debate of ideas, as any attempt to extend a discussion is view as an argument, and cause the poster to be ban.
I will stop here lest my long post is view as an initiation of an argument by someone who may in turn report me. As I still have interest in reading the forum, with the exception of posting anything lengthy or meaningful.
Thanks.
It is not common for a member to be banned for a "mild, reasonable, and intellectual response".
The moderators here try to be very careful in how they watch over the content of posts. We often discuss things among ourselves and come to a decision we all can agree on.
Sometimes we make mistakes, letting things go too far, or stepping in too early. This is just a fact of life, but in each case we try to correct our error. That can mean locking a thread, or even unlocking a thread if we decide we acted prematurely.
But like it or not, this site does have Rules, they are clearly stated and will be enforced (as fairly as humanly possible).
Sarah L.
I will agree with Jodi.
I have seen a double standard in play here on Susans.
I do not care too go over every incident I have seen and I have no interest in trying to defend that statement.
It is what it is.
Jodi, I think you're assuming you're going to be shot down before you've even taken off. And it feels to me like you're trying to force your own set of rules on us about how this forum should be, or you'll take your bat and ball and go home - and that's emotional blackmail in my book, for what it's worth.
In turn, I think it's inappropriate and very matronising to describe what's happening here the way you have:
"Over protecting" someone who is communicating in an online forum, is in fact to handicap them, preventing them the opportunity for intellectual growth.
What you will mostly see here (if you choose to stay and participate) is all of us taking care of each other.
Quote from: jodi on March 30, 2011, 07:38:34 AM
The internet is supposed to be open to freedom of expression. But this forum apparently isn't. :(
:police: NO it isn't - This forum is owned and run by a private individual, namely Susan. This is the internet equivalent of her front room - and when you come into her house you play by her rules or you WILL be shown the door
Do I make myself clear?
I hope so because you are coming PERILOUSLY close to crossing the line.
This is your one friendly warning - the next one will be official - and after that it progresses inexorably towards banning!
So read the rules which you can find here https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html) and learn to live within them or go elsewhere - your choice! :police:
I think some people just miss the fact that Susans is a Transgender SUPPORT site, and unsupportive talk isn't tolerated. At least that's how I see it. Tracey
Quote from: jodi on March 30, 2011, 07:38:34 AM
The internet is supposed to be open to freedom of expression. But this forum apparently isn't. :(
Epic lulz at the irony in this statement.
"The internet is supposed to be open to freedom of expression. But this forum apparently isn't."
Actually, yes, I agree, the internet as a whole should be open and free.
Just like the world (in my opinion) should be open and free.
But...
An individual site on the internet is not "the internet", just like an individual house or place of business is not the world.
A place like this is more like a house than a place of business too.
So, This forum is like it's Susan's place, literally speaking.
Meaning, it's HER property.
There's a few people who work on her behalf to keep her property Safe in accordance to the rules that she has set for her own place, her property.
It's like if we were all in her livingroom. If she says "you're not allowed to smoke in here" then we, on her behalf, would be given the responsibility to kick you out if you start smoking.
This place isn't a democracy, it's someone's personal property.
The rules aren't forced on you, nor anyone else, we're all free to leave whenever we want, you included.
"A regulated forum is limiting the possibility for fair debate of ideas"
That depends on what you consider "fair".
Everyone has to obey the same rules of conduct, whether they're new members or old moderators, that's fairer than most forums I've seen.
What you can't debate here, you're still free to debate in any number of other places, so we're not preventing you from debating the ideas simply stating that you can't do that "here".
And there are only a couple things you can't debate here, the rules are primarily related to how we conduct ourselves in debates.
Meaning that you're not allowed to be a jerk to other people.
Which I think's pretty fair, cause other people aren't allowed to be a jerk towards you either.
So yeah.
I love this place for all the reasons above.
It's a gift from the founder, one worth a lot to me.
And it is, in my opinion, quite fair. More so than most other places.
I love it.
If you don't like it, then you don't have to be here.
I've read something nice this morning what suits this situation somehow: "don't put anything on the internet you wouldn't say to your neighbors".
As mentioned before, probably most of the people don't mean to offend or isult other people here but it might happen because of peoples differnt cultures and backgrounds. In that case we should try to solve it like adults.
I agree with the moderators, we should respect the rules here set up by susan just as one has to respect the rules of a person if you are visiting their house.
Quote from: yoxi on March 30, 2011, 08:02:29 AM
If someone complains to a moderator about someone else's post, the moderator (thank goodness!) will show common sense about whether to act on it or not (I speak as someone who occasionally shoots first and asks questions later, and then needs to take back the bullet ::)).
You are a wise person we are all equals even the best of us is but human (and I wish you'd change that damn name lol)
Quote from: Sophie on April 06, 2011, 10:38:25 AM
(and I wish you'd change that damn name lol)
...that's harassment, I'm complaining to the Moderator!!! :)
*Evil grin* The levels I can go to annoy knows no limits muahaha
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ficanhascheezburger.wordpress.com%2Ffiles%2F2008%2F12%2Ffunny-pictures-cat-bullies-another-cat.jpg&hash=5154b13bf0bd2cf26ccc4313cc7e34e97b784c69)
hmm this forum has its moments as do some mods but then so do several individuals who regularly post my exp has been you get a warning after that it progresses if the behavior continues seams fair to me
I wanted to post here about my recent bout of angering some by using the wrong words.
I am new to this stuff so I used the word straight to describe myself. That is all I knew.
Now upon being informed of the term cisgender I can post with the proper terms.
I posted an apology in the Christian section where most of my posts are at.
I figured I would post it here as well since it seems to fit.
Having said such, I am sorry if I offended anyone by using the wrong words.
Take care.
Del
Kia Ora,
"You can please some of the people some of the time :icon_bunch: but not all of the people all of the time :icon_evil_laugh: "
I'd just like to say "You're all doing a good job mods and also most members here do seem to be policing themselves quite well !"
Metta Zenda :)
The words straight and queer by their very existence make a dichotomy that does not exist. Using those words and I do believe you Del completely you just used the word straight as it's the word you just assumed identified you. I don't like either word it's making a false dichtomy. People use the word queer or straight as both these people using these bs words have issues about fitting in, they don't think they do.
Can there be a legitimate use of a word like straight with it's connotations of truth? Or queer, deviating from the 'norm'? Neither is true when you look we are individuals it's about time people literally grew up and took control of their own lives.
Thank you.
So, should I lie then?
P.S. I'm real good at it. Watch.
You look great!
Quote from: Lexia on June 09, 2011, 06:04:31 PM
The words straight and queer by their very existence make a dichotomy that does not exist...People use the word queer or straight as both these people using these bs words have issues about fitting in, they don't think they do.
I could say a lot about this post, but I'll keep it brief. Frankly, I think you're setting up a false dichotomy yourself. I've known a couple of straight queer people...the two terms are not mutually exclusive, you know.
I should also add that quite a lot of people, including folks on this site, self-identify using the labels "straight" or "queer" or even both. Calling these words "bs" is essentially a personal attack on such people. Please stop. We all have the right to label ourselves any way we want; and on this site, we all have the right to expect that people will not define our labels as "bs."
Quote from: Arch on June 11, 2011, 10:35:18 PM
I could say a lot about this post, but I'll keep it brief.
It's called a reaction. I find myself reacting to you but I contain it I'll try and explain.
Quote from: Arch on June 11, 2011, 10:35:18 PM
Frankly, I think you're setting up a false dichotomy yourself. I've known a couple of straight queer people...the two terms are not mutually exclusive, you know.
Thank you you've proved my point it's a false dichtomy everyone is equally strange and average, maybe if you read some of my other posts you'd see that, especially at least 3 posts after this one in other places on the site. The word 'straight' has connotations, and it's the same for the word 'queer', so I think we should get past the superior because I'm square, don't deny it's the default position, and superior because I'm more different. Using a word as a means of superiority.
But of course there's money to be made defending words. Rather than labeling me as an outsider, I'd never do such a thing that is exactly the problem Arch. Explain why these words are fine to use? Rather than think it's fine to perpetuate a war.
So do you understand what I'm saying now? Nowt queer as
folk Folk everyone
everyone [/b] Arch.
Quote from: Arch on June 11, 2011, 10:35:18 PM
I should also add that quite a lot of people, including folks on this site, self-identify using the labels "straight" or "queer" or even both. Calling these words "bs" is essentially a personal attack on such people. Please stop. We all have the right to label ourselves any way we want; and on this site, we all have the right to expect that people will not define our labels as "bs."
Those labels are everyones, don't ever forget that. I like the words vanilla, chocolate, mint choc chip, far better than that supremicist crap.
Considering the thread title, it's ironic what I'm about to say, but could we tone it down a bit?
Lexia, one of my points was that you seemed to be falling into the same trap that you accuse others of falling into. You seem to think that people make a false dichotomy by using the terms "straight" and "queer" as opposites, but a lot of people, including me and practically all of my close friends, do not use those terms as polar opposites. For those of us who do that (and, in my travels, I've encountered quite a few of us), there is no dichotomy. I think perhaps you have misunderstood how a great many people use those terms.
I enjoy discussion about controversial subjects, including people's labeling systems or lack of them. However, as a moderator, I draw the line at invective, personal attacks, and negative judgments on how people self-label and self-identify. People have a right to come to Susan's and label themselves as straight or queer or whatever, without having someone else call those labels "BS."
I'm not even going to read your replies
It's not acceptable for anyone to use those words like pooftah and queer. Consider this my last post.
It's not acceptable for anyone to use those words like pooftah and queer.
People over here use queer to self-ID all the time. Who are you to tell them they can't? Pooftah sounds like a Monty Python type word. Never hear that one.
Those little puffs behind cartoon characters when they are moving fast. Pooftahs. :laugh:
How did this thread just turn into whatever it is? ???
Quote from: ativan on June 12, 2011, 07:11:53 PM
Those little puffs behind cartoon characters when they are moving fast. Pooftahs. :laugh:
How did this thread just turn into whatever it is? ???
It was a discussion about "straight" that turned into a discussion of "straight vs queer" and then turned into...uh, you got me.
"I say, Ernest, why can't we all be chums?"
Give a monkey a wrench... Sit back and see what happens :laugh:
Sorry, I'm terrible
So since we're on the topic, how exactly would be appropriate for disarming a brewing argument about terminologies and groupings? It'd be a mouthful to lay a full explanation that agreeing to many standards simultaneously can't pan out every time... ;.;
I think people just have to accept that definitions are subjective, not objective. Any two people who use the same term to describe themselves will mean slightly-to-very different things by it. So using any term as a "group definer" is always going to be less than ideal, but we make do, because we're social animals, and we like and need tribal identities as well as personal ones.
I think of labels as being like models (like a blueprint, or a psychological model for example) - where the model is an attempt to describe an experience in a useful way for a particular context. It doesn't necessarily work outside of that context, and it's no substitute for the actual experience. So I think the best we can do is ask each other "how is it for you?" and broaden our horizons. Once people start using labels to draw inclusion-exclusion lines, it gets bloody.
If someone uses a term to describe themselves, and uses it in a very different way from me, it's healthier for me to be interested than feel threatened. I'm fascinated by how many widely different interpretations there are of the basic terms that get used here to describe gender perception, and how upset people (including myself, occasionally) can get about that.
Of course, that's just my take on it :).
Everyone desperately trying to find a group to be a part of so they can express their individuality. Got it.
Quote from: Sabriel Facrin on June 14, 2011, 11:44:39 AM
So since we're on the topic, how exactly would be appropriate for disarming a brewing argument about terminologies and groupings? It'd be a mouthful to lay a full explanation that agreeing to many standards simultaneously can't pan out every time... ;.;
YOU can't disarm it, only the people engaged in the dispute can by accepting the fact we all have our own ideas and opinions and the concept of trying to get everyone to agree on one thing is doomed to fail every time.
There's a simple way to avoid becoming involved in an imbroglio, acceptance. You don't have to agree or disagree. If you want to state your opinion, do so and just leave it. What others do with it has no effect on you... unless you let it.
Quote from: tekla on June 14, 2011, 12:16:58 PM
Everyone desperately trying to find a group to be a part of so they can express their individuality. Got it.
Oh, totally - I know loads of people what are card-carrying members of the tribe of people who don't belong to tribes :).
I tell people all the time that I could get 10K people out in SF to have a protest march protesting protest marches.
the concept of trying to get everyone to agree on one thing is doomed to fail every time
Oh dictionaries seemed to work well for people for a long time, until the internet and everyone started writing their own dictionary while living in their own private Idaho with there own personal facts.
I stopped taking all this too seriously when I came across the term "pomosexual", looked it up and discovered it stands for post-modern-sexual, and is only used by the around 20 people who coined it in the first place. Yawn. May non-existent deities protect us from term-coiners with agendas.
is only used by the around 20 people who coined it in the first place
None of whom had ever had sex, nor will they ever - at least sex with another partner.
Oh, I expect they have sex with each other - and then deconstruct it at conferences.
Hi Julie :angel: You are a human being my dear of course so you should certainly have the freedom to join the site. You seem to be a nice person and since you are biological, there are surely things that you can share that might interest some :) I know I would certainly enjoy hearing your views although I may not always agree. Look forward to hearing from you hon.
Hola.
Shortly before the site went down there was a new message from the Mods introducing an amnesty to previously banned members and what I took to be a gentler approach to moderation.
I'm not now sure where that post went but this seems an appropriate place to add a thought. It would generally be great if moderators didn't feel the need to respond all the time to what people post, even when they don't totally agree etc. Opinions don't need moderating. Moderation could in other words be lighter on the surface. There's a difference between necessary disciplining and appearing heavy-handed. Not always an enviable task for moderators to steer a balance, so well done to you all for volunteering to do it, but please keep it as a light touch on the surface. That way people hopefully won't run away from here.
xx
Dear Tills,
Thank you for voicing your concerns about our moderation practices. We understand the importance of cultivating an open, supportive, and welcoming environment within our forum. Effective moderation is essential to promote constructive dialogue and ensure adherence to our community guidelines. While our aim is to minimize unnecessary intervention, we recognize that moderation is occasionally required to prevent conflicts from escalating.
Please be aware that our moderators, who engage in the forum using a single account just like any other member, may not always be acting in an official capacity. If you have felt our moderation approach to be overly restrictive, we extend our sincerest apologies. We are dedicated to achieving a balanced moderation strategy and genuinely appreciate your suggestions on how we can enhance our community. We ask for everyone's patience and goodwill towards one another during this process.
Your input is immensely valuable, and we encourage you to participate in discussions on topics that resonate with you. It is noteworthy, however, that your contributions have predominantly critiqued site policies that are no longer in effect, and staff. We kindly suggest moving beyond past those grievances to enrich your forum experience by engaging with a wider array of discussions in the future.
Sincerely,
Thanks Susan and point taken ;)
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