Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Who in your life do you feel most connected to? When you hear a new song, a new joke, or something interesting happens to you, whom do want to tell? If there's someplace you want to go, who's the first person you ask along?

My wife.

Since my doggy died, no one. But I'm used to it.

   Satinjoy

Quote from: Jaime R D on November 17, 2014, 07:54:09 PM
Since my doggy died, no one. But I'm used to it.

Big hug! I'm down to one dog now, he's the only one that gets the news of my life. I voted for the last option.

Quote from: Jaime R D on November 17, 2014, 07:54:09 PM
Since my doggy died, no one. But I'm used to it.

Big hugs to you.  I miss all my furry beastie friends so much.

my daughters... they are the apple of my eye

Sorry to hear about your loss of pets. I've lost 2 cats and a dog within the last year. So many fur babies. :(

I have a few friends here but don't have much ability to go out keeping me locked away most of the time it seems.

I oscillate between I don't need anyone like that, I wish I had someone like that, and hope that one day my SO would be that person.

That would be my best friend.  I love my best friend so much as she is so awesome.  I'm hoping one day I can have an S/O to talk to like I talk to her.

Myself, I very much prefer to be without people.

My daughters are the only people that I really share my life with as my wife is still struggling with my situation and does not want to know, untill it effects her.

My best friend or my dog. Both are technically housemates as well? :)

Whenever something new happens, I get so excited to tell a certain very special girl the next time we talk. :)

I had a friend like that but we had a massive "never talking to you again" falling out over something incredibly juvenile. We were both to blame and she moved off to another city and deliberately broke off all contact. I was (and am still) so angry about I never bothered to reconcile. Stupid I know. I had a big hole in my life after that, she was the person I'd catch up with every week, see movies with, chat on the phone, gossip, debrief, have drinks and dinner, etc. People were  convinced we were a couple but it was never like that. I'm over that loss but it would be nice to have someone like that again.  :-\

My wife *is* my best friend, so technically both of those, I guess. :)

At one point in my life that person would have been my younger brother and because of our closely shared lives he still "gets me" but is thousands of miles away and distance presents obstacles to updated connections for us.  I am fortunate to have a large circle of friends and those most connected ones are people who have shared time and space together in fun times and in adversity.  For many of us the connections work well enough to pick up where we left off, days, months, or even years ago.  The most meaningful connections need to be nurtured and mutually supported for growth and for going the distance IMO.  That most connected person in my life is my partner, spouse, friend and companion going on 41 years together, my wife.  Thanks for the thread and opportunity to reflect and make that tribute.

Quote from: suzifrommd on November 17, 2014, 07:48:30 PM
Who in your life do you feel most connected to? When you hear a new song, a new joke, or something interesting happens to you, whom do want to tell? If there's someplace you want to go, who's the first person you ask along?

my youngest daughter

Right now I'm kind of lacking that person. Either I'll meet someone special in the future or I can share that with my son when he's a little older.

my husband; he's my rock

Thanks for all your replies.

I asked this question because I'm firmly in the "wish I had someone like that."

Since my separation, I really have no one to talk to about the things that are happening in my life. I have a lot of acquaintances, and very few friends. The friends such as I have make it clear I'm a really low priority in their life. If I call them, I can expect to wait a week or two for a return call.

There's no one I talk to on a regular basis, to hear what's going on in their life and to talk about mine. The loneliness is getting really, really painful.

I've been working with my therapist and she's been trying to help me with my social ineptitude, but she can't wave a wand and make friends appear. I wanted to know if other people where in the same position I was.

It seems that more than half the respondents have a friend or partner they can talk to, and less than 1 in 5 wish they had someone but didn't, so I'm clearly in a smallish minority. That would say to me that I'm not asking a lot and that there's probably something wrong with me or the way I interact that's causing me to be this alone.

It used to be Birkin. Now, no one. Never again.

Quote from: suzifrommd on December 17, 2014, 07:29:03 AM
Thanks for all your replies.

I asked this question because I'm firmly in the "wish I had someone like that."

Since my separation, I really have no one to talk to about the things that are happening in my life. I have a lot of acquaintances, and very few friends. The friends such as I have make it clear I'm a really low priority in their life. If I call them, I can expect to wait a week or two for a return call.

There's no one I talk to on a regular basis, to hear what's going on in their life and to talk about mine. The loneliness is getting really, really painful.

I've been working with my therapist and she's been trying to help me with my social ineptitude, but she can't wave a wand and make friends appear. I wanted to know if other people where in the same position I was.

It seems that more than half the respondents have a friend or partner they can talk to, and less than 1 in 5 wish they had someone but didn't, so I'm clearly in a smallish minority. That would say to me that I'm not asking a lot and that there's probably something wrong with me or the way I interact that's causing me to be this alone.

Actually doesn't seem like you're in that small of a minority. Transitioning was like taking an axe to my family and I basically don't talk to anyone, then I moved miles away so I don't have to see anyone either. I don't have anyone to talk to either I live with my wife but in her own words "she's refusing to divorce me because I owe her health benefits and support until she can support herself for lying to her about not being a man." She however has not shown me love and has avoided all conversations that don't involve our son for the past year. Its actually more lonely then if I was living alone I think.

My boyfriend. He's such an amazing person I am constantly wondering if he's a hallucination.

My wife. She is also my best friend and 'soul mate'. We have been together since high school and married for 40 years.

A peripheral friend who lives on the other side of the planet.

I've learned a lot of things about family and friendship down the years, a lot of them about putting too much store in people only to be betrayed or disappointed. I generally don't confide much of anything to anyone any more and I don't run to anyone to ask them to come do things with me. But that guy's known me 15 years and in a strange way we know where each other is coming from. We've both been through some tough times, lost people, had our dark nights of the soul and it's somewhat reassuring to know although we both exude confidence and nonchalance to everyone around us that we do have a human side and certain weaknesses and it helps to know someone else knows what I mean. I'm wary about relying on anyone though so I'll just say I appreciate this guy. 

My daughter, niece, and youngest sister.

No one other then PoP-Tart


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Quote from: KittyKatKiera on March 15, 2018, 04:37:45 PM
No one other then PoP-Tart


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Wow, you must be rich!!!!!!

My dad and brother.

My mom even though we clash a lot

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My mom. If it was not for her support then I would not have gotten very far in life honestly.  She is the reason why I was even able to transition as my social anxiety would not allow me to seek treatment on my own, because it would require me to actually speak to people.

My social anxiety has gotten better, and I think being transgender was causing it.

Family member. More specifically my mother. Growing up she was the parent I was the closest to, and I never connected well to my father. I can talk to my mother about anything, but I notice she gets uncomfortable about sexual topics so I try to avoid those unless it's really important. But just the other day we were discussing what kind of porn we both liked watching, so yeah.

She's been very supportive of me being trans, although it took her a long time to get used to my new name and pronouns. Now she's helping me with transition stuff, and anything I need help with, and she's always the one I turn to in most situations. Some things I rather keep to myself and/or talk to my therapist about instead though.

My only issues with her, really, are that I think I'm too dependent on her and that she is too over-protective. She underestimates me a lot.

Quote from: TicTac on March 29, 2018, 03:14:51 AM
My mom. If it was not for her support then I would not have gotten very far in life honestly.  She is the reason why I was even able to transition as my social anxiety would not allow me to seek treatment on my own, because it would require me to actually speak to people.

My social anxiety has gotten better, and I think being transgender was causing it.

Wow, it's pretty eerie how closely this sums me up!

My Mom and my sister have been incredibly supportive of me since I came out to them. They believed me when I told them I was a girl on the inside before I even really believed myself.  :laugh:

I also suffer from social anxiety. But when I told my therapist that I had been previously diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, she was very skeptical because I had no trouble talking to her. She helped me realize that I had never really learned how to interact in social situations because I was getting nothing out of them.

Now I just have to put myself out there and get better at interacting with people!  ;D

Definitely my Fiance who is like Kristoff to my Anna from Frozen and we finish each other's sandwiches. :)

Before he came into my life it was my Mom.

No one really, but if I had to pick someone it'd be my aunt. She's really the only person in my life that has supported me, and I'll never be able to repay her for it.

My mom; my friends and the rest of my family pretty much all dropped me when I came out, and I could never bring myself to inflicting myself on someone in a relationship, so no spouse or kids.

I am so sorry to hear this, just know you are worthy of love. You just have to look for it, and believe it or not you will eventually find it I am sure!

At this point in time I am most connected to my common law spouse. Not that it has always been that way, mostly because she is the only I have left, family is all gone now. Even back when I did have family, it would have been my SO since nobody knew of my transgenderism. I think my mother would have been Okay with it though.

Liina

My soul mate of over 35 years, I am deeply connected to her in so many ways.....

My spouse

My younger (35 years old) girlfriend, she is to me like the daughter I never had.