Susan's Place Transgender Resources

General Discussions => General discussions => Topic started by: Dee Marshall on January 25, 2016, 08:16:03 am

Title: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on January 25, 2016, 08:16:03 am
I've been unhappy not just today, but pretty much the whole weekend. I AM SICK AND TIRED OF BEING THE GHOST OF MY WIFE'S HUSBAND! Ahem, sorry for the screaming. She loves me, and supports me, but she won't touch me or kiss me anymore. I love her, I don't want anyone else!... And it hurts me to see her cry because I'm not who she thought I was. I'm not looking for suggested solutions, just commiseration.

Even though the town has asked us to conserve water, I'm gonna go soak in a hot tub of bubbles.
Title: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 25, 2016, 01:10:46 pm
Sorry you're going through that Dee
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jessie Ann on January 25, 2016, 01:42:49 pm
Hugs Dee!  It's toughest on those who have known and loved us the longest.  They have years of memories of our old selves and it takes time and more time for the new normal to take hold.  The fact that she loves and supports you is an amazing and incredible gift.  Hopefully the physical part will come along too!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sophieraven on January 25, 2016, 01:54:36 pm
Loads of commiseration and Hugs from the Ravens nest. And remember we all love you Too.
Sophie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on January 25, 2016, 02:59:21 pm
Thank you all, I really do appreciate it. But isn't one long hard slog (HRT) at a time enough? I had some good today, though, a long chat with my cousin's daughter (reported in the proper places).
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Tristyn on January 25, 2016, 04:40:46 pm
My narcissistic, controlling, transphobic/homophobic, Conservative father. ;D

Then again, no one can control how I feel. Only I have thee power to make myself feel a certain way.  Yes, he is controlling but I don't care how much he thinks he can control, he cannot control my emotions. Nobody can....
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Tech_Nymph on January 26, 2016, 07:17:42 pm
Well...
Today I worked over 13 hours to cover for a slacker at my workplace. When I finally left and made my way home my best friend is at the door waiting for me.
He asks "did you hear about the black kitty?". The black kitty is a 1-1.5 yr old cat that I rescued when it's momma died. I would take it and clean out its wee little eyes because it had allergies. It always had a bad tendency to stay dirty and I would have kept him indoors but I can't in my living situation. I'm certain he was mentally challenged even for a cat. He would sit on a metal grate in the snow or rain and stare at the sky as it poured on him. But even though he was a little special runt, he was mine, I loved him anyway. Fast forward to me getting home today after my long shift. My friend explains to me in detail that two dogs that were kept in a lot at our building escaped. They ripped my precious Felix apart... My friends mom showed up and saw it all. Even after nearly ripping him in half Felix was still alive.. The animal shelter had to put him down because there was no way he would have made it.. I should have been there for him because I know he was too stupid to run from those dogs. I at least wish I could have been the one to deal with those evil satan spawn. There would have been no need to call the shelter. Although the neighbors would wonder why the backyard sounded like world war 3. So here I am. I will never see my Felix again. The sweet lovable special kitty of mine. Because I couldn't save him.
Goodbye Felix.    :'(

I will never own a dog, ever.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 26, 2016, 07:28:12 pm
That's terrible!!!  :icon_no:

R.I.P. dear Felix  :'(

Extra massive Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Tech_Nymph on January 26, 2016, 07:44:32 pm
I miss him so much! Every time I came home he would run to my car and wait for me so I'd pet him.   :'(
The only good news is that his brother escaped. But now he's looking everywhere for Felix. There's a stray that would sit with them both sometimes and it's even doing the same. Searching..
 
Thank you for your kindness.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on January 27, 2016, 02:27:36 pm

Well...
Today I worked over 13 hours to cover for a slacker at my workplace. When I finally left and made my way home my best friend is at the door waiting for me.
He asks "did you hear about the black kitty?". The black kitty is a 1-1.5 yr old cat that I rescued when it's momma died. I would take it and clean out its wee little eyes because it had allergies. It always had a bad tendency to stay dirty and I would have kept him indoors but I can't in my living situation. I'm certain he was mentally challenged even for a cat. He would sit on a metal grate in the snow or rain and stare at the sky as it poured on him. But even though he was a little special runt, he was mine, I loved him anyway. Fast forward to me getting home today after my long shift. My friend explains to me in detail that two dogs that were kept in a lot at our building escaped. They ripped my precious Felix apart... My friends mom showed up and saw it all. Even after nearly ripping him in half Felix was still alive.. The animal shelter had to put him down because there was no way he would have made it.. I should have been there for him because I know he was too stupid to run from those dogs. I at least wish I could have been the one to deal with those evil satan spawn. There would have been no need to call the shelter. Although the neighbors would wonder why the backyard sounded like world war 3. So here I am. I will never see my Felix again. The sweet lovable special kitty of mine. Because I couldn't save him.
Goodbye Felix.    :'(

I will never own a dog, ever.
That's so sad. Special kitties need the most love of all.
Just wait though, and I bet a new kitty will come by. I swear I have a reincarnation of one of my favorite cats from back in the 90's now. I can't tell if he is a genius or incredibly stupid though.
Yeah, why would anyone want a dog?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 29, 2016, 04:53:18 am
A new snowstorm rolled in during the night and is forecast to last all weekend  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on January 29, 2016, 05:29:06 am
Massive rain storm as I left work, wearing a summer dress. I was a drowned rat in seconds. Slipped walking to my car and smashed my ribs into a fence.
I had damaged them last week.

I was crying in pain but so wet no one could tell.

I feel awful, I have so much to do but feel so sick.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Violets on January 29, 2016, 09:30:45 am
Massive rain storm as I left work, wearing a summer dress. I was a drowned rat in seconds. Slipped walking to my car and smashed my ribs into a fence.
I had damaged them last week.

I was crying in pain but so wet no one could tell.

I feel awful, I have so much to do but feel so sick.

That's terrible, Cindy! I hope you didn't fracture them.

Wishing you a speedy recovery.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on February 04, 2016, 02:25:36 am
Work has just gone from bad to worse.
Manager and senior manager have resigned as they don't like the direct the company is going.
The team will have two more resignations this week.

Getting asked to take a career step back to cover all the BS.

Time to start engaging the recruiters from tonight.

Not happy at all as it is a total mess.

Cindy take some endone and get some rest.
You will not feel anything.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on February 04, 2016, 03:06:06 am
Recruiter contacted as a few role I can walk straight into.
They got me the current job so it will be a piece of pavlova.

Feel a bit better but still mad that this is the only real option with the brown stuff hitting the fan
I will make them hurt when I go as I will have 60 day leave owing. Ouch

 >:( >:( >:( >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on February 04, 2016, 03:21:09 am
^^^

So you coming to Adelaide for a few days?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 04, 2016, 03:26:52 am
Another snow storm and I somehow managed to wrench my bad shoulder and neck  :P  Can hardly move my left arm
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on February 04, 2016, 04:10:55 am
^^^

So you coming to Adelaide for a few days?

After what I did to you last time you want me back for more?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on February 04, 2016, 04:27:47 am
^^^

So you coming to Adelaide for a few days?

After what I did to you last time you want me back for more?

Honey, I have lived at the bottom of life. The people who saved me didn't give up.

I never give up.

You are welcome here, I even have a spare room.

I utterly don't care if you present as X, jenny, Ronald McDonald, or a cat.

If you want to talk and see me, my arms, ears and door is open.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Tristyn on February 04, 2016, 01:11:45 pm
Being told "NO..." again...and again...and again....
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Mariah on February 04, 2016, 03:55:01 pm
Sorry that your having that happen. I hope things turn around for you. Hugs Mariah
Being told "NO..." again...and again...and again....


Sent from my Mariah's iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sophieraven on February 04, 2016, 04:09:21 pm
^^^

So you coming to Adelaide for a few days?

Why don't i get offers like that? :(    I love Adelaide.

@Tech_nymphe - Sorry i'm late on this but sorry to hear about Felix, All Kitty's need love especially the runts.

Sophie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FreyasRedemption on February 04, 2016, 05:00:22 pm
Everything in general. Test week. Dysphoria. Pondering in the middle of the night if I'm capable of ever reaching a life which I will be satisfied with, and whether I would deserve that or not.
Things just aren't working out for me at the moment. Maybe they will, someday. But not now, nor any time soon.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: schwarzwalderkirschtort on February 04, 2016, 05:53:34 pm
My first day back in school was today, after nearly a full week of absence due to a pretty nasty virus. My first class was English, and the teacher asked out of curiosity if I had read up to date on our work. I replied that I'd read ahead before being ill, but had been too sick to do anything really. Quick as a flash this girl darts around and goes,
"WELL, I was sick too, but I got it done. What's your excuse?". The teacher and a few other students jumped to my defense, but this girl has a history of being quite unkind and trying to embarrass me/make me look lazy and stupid in front of other people for no reason really.

   At the end of my school day, I had a surprise test, with three more over the next three days, and over 7 essays and 3 competitions I have to enter, all but one due by tomorrow or Monday. I stayed up for hours working away on all of this, including my missed work, and still haven't finished each one. Thank goodness two teachers have given me an extension on work or I'd have even less time to sleep.

  Later on my friend said my hair looked crappy, before I said I had to cut it myself. I actually got a few compliments on it, which was good, but it was still annoying. He doesn't realise I 1. don't have the money for a haircut and 2. don't have permission to get it cut since I "don't pass as male at all and a barber won't take me" according to my mother. She's really been drilling in that I don't pass lately and it's beginning to really get to me... Either way, I spent 3~ hours cutting my hair to simply avoid him complaining about it and to relieve the dysphoria.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: DiamondBladee on February 04, 2016, 08:21:56 pm
I just had to say bye to some people I've been marching with for years.  As a very committed marching band member, I'm just feeling extremely devastated right now.  Of these 10 or so people, probably only one or two will be able to make a visit anytime soon :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on February 09, 2016, 04:00:49 am
Dealing with people who are barely competent all day at work.
They don't even know how to do their jobs.

And I have to fix it always... >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: schwarzwalderkirschtort on February 10, 2016, 10:48:09 am
woman in a shop served everyone else in line behind me before serving me, even though I'd been there long before and was standing at the front of the line. I had to ask her to serve me which she grudgingly did. Was late for class. Gotta love being treated like a second class citizen!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: GingerMaxim on February 10, 2016, 12:44:58 pm
Placing my breast pump on my breasts...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Liam on February 12, 2016, 04:52:33 am
It's 2016, I'm 19, my parents still won't acknowledge that I'm a guy, I have no idea when I'll be able to get on T, and I still look like a girl. Not even like a young boy like a lot of pre-T trans guys do, I look straight up like a girl.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 19, 2016, 03:54:30 am
Feeling really sad for a friend  :-\  As some of you may know I deal with spinal injuries, the other day after going to a therapy session I saw a friend who use to live down the hall in my apt. complex

She has spinal injuries also, unfortunately she had a couple of procedures done but it doesn't look to have gone so well  :-\  She looks like she had aged 10 years overnight

I was offered to have my neck and back fused, but after seeing the results of others I'm thinking

"No way am I going for that stuff!!!"

Anyway, that's been gnawing at my mind lately

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Evil Lyn on February 19, 2016, 06:14:45 pm
While I am happy I only have 1st World problems to contend with, I have to say gas makes me miserable.  I'm not talking about the price at the pump either.  I'm talking flatulence.  The poots.  Grade-A panty parters.

The worst part?  I have to breathe sometime...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: GingerMaxim on March 02, 2016, 03:27:53 am
What made me unhappy was asking my partner over a month ago if they could help me after my surgery for 1 day and then 2 days ago they get a call from a friend and they jump to go out and now they won't help me after my surgery.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 09, 2016, 02:38:38 am
Not sure if it's a cold or flu but I've come down with a nasty bug  :P 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Janine on March 10, 2016, 12:39:52 pm
Technically not today, but last night I was forced to stay late at work because my co-worker slacked off, watched YouTube, etc. while on the clock. I had to help L wash dishes while D was screwing around, AND had to reclean the floor that D said he cleaned but really didn't get it anywhere close to clean. Three people running and cleaning a deli with four sections is bad enough, but when one doesn't pull their weight to the very end, it shows. I got out thirty minutes late.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jayne on March 12, 2016, 04:54:06 pm
My beloved Poopie is not well, he didn't wake me up today which is strange. I found him behind the settee shaking & whimpering, if he tried to move he yelped.
I just got home from the vets, they can't find anything wrong but agree something isn't right, he hasn't touched his fresh water today & yesterday whilst drinking he left a reddish brown slober in the bowl.

He was given a painkiller injection but is reluctant to move now we've got home, he's gotten me through so many bad times I wish I could do more to help him
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on March 13, 2016, 03:59:37 am
Not happy about a lot of things. Wonder if there is any point.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: King Malachite on March 13, 2016, 02:06:36 pm
There is a bird making a bird nest in a box in our garage for her babies, and my mother has vowed to get rid of it. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Felix on March 14, 2016, 08:37:17 am
My kid just doesn't get why my cat is afraid of her. Like if you just go a day or two without screaming or growling then domesticated animals will let you pet them. It's not complicated.

I feel so bad about standing up for the cat but my kid is not even trying. Like go ahead and grunt and holler but don't get wistful afterward about how the cat doesn't like you. No judgement if you have to scream, really. But stop acting like it's a hurtful surprise when living creatures are afraid. That stuff is loud and scary.

God I'm so frustrated.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kimberley Beauregard on March 14, 2016, 09:32:06 am
Finishing my coffee and as the day goes on, realising everything sucks and hating everyone/everything.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jayne on March 14, 2016, 12:38:45 pm
I had my session with my gender therapist today & it left me in tears.
I raised the subject of my lack of breast development, after 2 years on hrt I'm an uneven a cup. I said that I want to have BA & my therapist spent the next 45 minutes trying to convince me that I shouldn't, at one point she told me "this is the NHS & funds are limited"
I always thought you couldn't put a price on happiness, what a fool I've been!!
Certain companies dodge tax without consequences in the UK & its always those of us at the bottom of the pile who get told we have to think about the cost to society.

Cis women can get BA on the NHS so surely if someone transitioning in their 40's feels the need for this then it should be considered.
I'm already facing a huge bill to pay for FFS once I'm back in employment & now I may find I have to pay privately for BA in the future, it feels like the mountain I'm climbing just turned into a sheer cliff of ice.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: King Malachite on March 15, 2016, 10:55:31 pm
I ordered a chicken philly at my job, and the lady gave me a philly cheesesteak.  She didn't even give me a fork or napkins like she usually does, and I felt like she just rushed cooking the food.  She even slightly slammed the receipt for me to sign.  The last time she did give me a chicken philly, she put mayonnaise on it when I never request that.  I specifically specified cheese, onions, and bell peppers only.  I don't think she really likes me.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: SophiaBleu on March 16, 2016, 10:23:32 pm
yesterday, during my therapy, my therapist had to remind me that black transwomen face the most danger(relatively speaking. We ALL face danger).  I have been ruminating over this all day, and have been in a funk. I went to a space that was definitely not safe with some friends. I won't be doing that again anytime soon.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 17, 2016, 05:28:14 pm
I just had a "thing" with my spouse. It wasn't an argument because it was all one-sided. She said a lot of random things and I can't really pick out any common thread. The only thing I can get her to admit is that she wishes I weren't trans and claims that I can't see that we're headed for divorce. I told her that that wasn't a step I was willing to take but evidently she is because "not being trans" is the only thing that will resolve the issue for her.

I moved all my things into the guest room.

I know I seem to be posting something like this about every six months or so. No need to repeat the usual advice. I've heard it. Even in a divorce I have nothing for her to take, our only child is an adult, and I make quite a bit less than she.

I have plenty of friends that support me. Many have said "call any time, day or night." Others have said that they have a spare room if needed. She has two friends and a brother. One of the friends is local. I worry for her.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: King Malachite on March 18, 2016, 12:07:14 am
Allergies
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on March 21, 2016, 10:46:01 pm
Looking down and seeing that unwanted thing made me somewhat unhappy.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: King Malachite on March 21, 2016, 11:00:27 pm
Dangit my period is supposed to come on during the weak I leave for Dollywood.  I pray that it somehow comes on earlier.  I do NOT want to be walking around that park "on the second day".  UGH, this SUCKS!  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on March 22, 2016, 11:45:26 am
Had a counselling session at the GIC, and whilst it was useful it did reopen some wounds that I'd managed to wallpaper over. These sessions always upset me, because they force me to confront the fact that my home life is one big, slow-motion train wreck.

So feeling rather drained after that session, I then returned home to find my daughter launching into a tirade which included her stamping about with an enormous knife held aggressively in her hand... all because she was annoyed that someone else had completed her Sudoku puzzle.

Sheesh.

One of the things the counsellor said to me is that I'm living in a toxic environment and it would be better all round if we could all move into separate accommodation. I agree, and my daughter's behaviour was yet more proof of that fact. But I have multiple reasons for being unable to get out of this situation at this time.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Karen6-10inheels on April 01, 2016, 04:26:33 pm
So far today, new pumps came to big. can't wear out on weekend. just inside.
Got to exchange.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laura_Squirrel on April 02, 2016, 05:26:29 pm
I'm not "unhappy". I'm P.O.'ed. Apparently, the idiots in the maintenance department can't be bothered to come up to my apartment just because it's a Saturday. Never mind the fact that my gas oven isn't working. Now, I have to spend money that could be used for other things on overpriced delivery food. God, I hate this place at times.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jestwacked on April 02, 2016, 06:32:36 pm
I had a big falling out with some friends so that has made me pretty upset and caused the usual chain reaction of negative thoughts : /
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: arice on April 02, 2016, 10:41:38 pm
My husband's cousin posting yet more transphobic links on FB... I am both angry and sad that she feels the need to repeatedly attack transgender children. She has 5 kids and I hope for the kids' sakes that they are all cis gendered and heterosexual...
I just needed to vent somewhere and I'm not in the same city as my husband this week... so you fine folks are the recipients...

Sent from my SM-G870W using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on April 03, 2016, 04:46:28 am
Vent away! Listening to venting is one of the services we provide each other. No way that you can block her I suppose.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: arice on April 03, 2016, 06:38:47 am
Vent away! Listening to venting is one of the services we provide each other. No way that you can block her I suppose.
Not without causing family drama... although my husband saw her post too and tore her and one of her friends a new one in his typical carefully researched and impossible to refute manner (multiple references and everything)... so by the time I went to bed I was at least happy about that...
He has always been my advocate in everything I do that is different from the norm (being vegetarian, not getting married until gay marriage was legal, getting my PhD, being genderqueer etc).

Sent from my SM-G870W using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on April 06, 2016, 03:56:00 pm
My state made it into the top 5 for highest suicide rates nation wide... Again  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 06, 2016, 05:09:02 pm
Flu, dripping with snot & a temperature
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laura_Squirrel on April 07, 2016, 01:47:12 am
Flu, dripping with snot & a temperature

Ewwww!

I'm glad that isn't my problem. I HATE being sick.

I had to throw out the strawberries because they were too tart. I usually don't throw away food. But, I couldn't eat those things.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on April 08, 2016, 08:57:39 am
Sinuses full, lungs congested to barely able to breathe at times.
Oh, and court yesterday to be evicted. Apartment to look at after? Nope, rented.
And a customer at work trying much too hard to get me fired.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on April 13, 2016, 10:57:01 pm
Although some days have been a bit warmer there is still a bit of chill in the air so I am still wearing my winter coat at night

Unfortunately my coat has begun to experience 'Zipper Fail'  :(  Oh well, I'll have a few months during summer to either find a new coat or see if I can get this one repaired with a new zip

It's a great coat otherwise and has a bit of sentimental value because it belonged to my favorite nephew before he passed away
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ClaudiaLove on April 13, 2016, 11:34:32 pm
I am mentally ill , i can t afford therapy and no one talks with me .
Soon i will have no money , i can t pay rent , i have body dysphoria , social dysphoria .

I wish life was easier
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 14, 2016, 01:15:35 am
The son of a guy I used to work with in court for a serious sexual offence involving a young boy 30 years ago. I always thought the son was weird, if I'd done something then maybe I could have stopped him.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on April 16, 2016, 11:25:17 am
I will loose my apartment in 2 days. I have a job but it's mostly under the table income. If I can't prove income then it seems that no one will rent to me. My credit is shot to hell. My partner is disabled but can't seem to get disability.
I'm so lost at this moment that I'm paralyzed by fear.
I've tried to get help and I have a caseworker and therapist but there's nothing anyone can do it seems.
If I leave my partner and the cats I could make it, but I can't do that. It's all the family I have.
I just am lower than I have ever been. Not suicidal yet, but not a whole lot of other options either
Sorry for the book. I just needed to vent and even Facebook is too public to vent this much
That's why I'm unhappy today
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on April 21, 2016, 01:52:37 pm
Still sad because I'm moving away from everyone I know. Lots of positive things,  but I'm going to miss my few close friends

Sent from my LGLS740 using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Rebecca on April 28, 2016, 07:24:18 am
After today's blood tests thinking that although Spiro protects me from the effects of T it is still flowing through my veins like a poison.

Made me feel very sad but lots of other things to be happy about.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 28, 2016, 07:31:03 am
Going back to the town where I was born. I thought I'd check out where I used to live and where my few friends lived. The street I lived in is a warzone(like most of the town). Jan's old house with smashed windows & a sofa in the front garden, Ray's old house boarded up.I never bothered to see were Nick, Donna & Mike used to live. A lot of shops from my childhood now empty, my old school full of shiny empty houses no one can afford.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on April 28, 2016, 07:31:26 am
My Sweetie hurt her leg badly and doesn't know how. She's missing work today because she can barely move and I'm missing work to take care of her. She has the necessary sick days, but if I miss work I don't get paid. Every time we get a little ahead something happens to push us right back down. I'm beginning to feel cursed!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on April 30, 2016, 09:35:03 am
The pharmacy screwing up my order and giving me the wrong brand of gel  >:(. I prefer my normal brand because it's quicker to dry and it comes in sachets so easy to get the gel out; instead of the brand they've given me which comes in metal tubes. For me having to go to the pharmacy every month is an ordeal in itself: as I have social anxiety and feel like I'm being scrutinised. They also didn't have my order yesterday when they should have done so had to go back today. I wish I could just have my prescription home delivered bit that isn't an option.
Any else feel mentally exhausted by this or is it just me? :/
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on May 01, 2016, 08:11:18 pm
Bigoted neighbors getting all agro and bothering me  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on May 02, 2016, 05:11:08 am
My dad calling me un attractive because I've gained a few pounds. It's only noticeable around my hips; I don't think my stomach bulges. Maybe my face looks a bit puffy. Earlier that day I actually looked in the mirror trying to make myself feel better about how I look; now that's completely out the window. And he wonders why I didn't get help for my mental health years ago.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on May 08, 2016, 03:22:57 am
More long hours at work. So far I have worked 30 days overtime in the last 3 months.
More this weekend and it never seems to stop.

I want to take leave as I have 60 days owing but can't.
Not happy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on May 08, 2016, 09:53:37 am
Blackpool relegated again!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on May 11, 2016, 09:32:54 am
Was feeling tired so went to bed, but then I couldn't shut my mind off and started having a massive anxiety attack  :P

Decided to get up and keep myself busy with various household chores and check my emails and such

Going to give it another go, hopefully I can get a couple of hours in before I have to start getting ready for an appointment  :-\
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on May 11, 2016, 04:59:25 pm
"Don't take this the wrong way..."

It's always a prelude to something offensive, when it's a prelude to complaining about me wearing a t-shirt that isn't two sizes too large it's even more so.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on May 20, 2016, 02:56:14 pm
Learning of one of my dearest friends taking ill  :'(  Feeling very worried for her
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Fresas con Nata on May 20, 2016, 07:17:39 pm
Not today but yesterday. After taking some steps to visit the GIC, I was expecting a call to settle the details of the appointment. I received the anticipated call, but I was the usual jerk I am:

—Hello?
—Malename Surname?
—Err "good morning". Yes it's me.

The woman offered me a closed appointment date, no negotiation this time, and I couldn't accept it because I'll be in London that week. So she told me she'd call again, but I'm sure she won't because my being rough :(

How can I expect to have a good social life as a woman, being so rude. Here's hoping that HRT will change my vision of the world and people. But first I need HRT!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Xhianil on May 21, 2016, 10:53:43 pm
Still struggling to figure out my housing situation.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on May 22, 2016, 04:13:45 am
Struggling with a friends open transphobia. :(

Sno
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on May 24, 2016, 09:01:29 am
Being yelled at for posting a thank you to Sweetie for 35 years of marriage (as of today) and telling her how much I love her and always will.

I deleted the post after that.

Follow-up:

The day got progressively worse. Sweetie told me this wasn't a marriage, that I'm not transgender, that my clothes are a slap in the face to her, that I've been unwilling to compromise,and that I had no consideration for her feelings at all. Only the marriage part is true and that only because she pushed me away in terms of physical affection, no hugs or kisses for example.

We had to go to court to face the possibility of eviction. We were able to come to an agreement with the lawyer. After that her mood changed entirely and she was quite pleasant to me, even making plans for the short vacation we have planned for a few weeks from now.

This is a pattern with her, bringing up everything that's bothered her when she's under other stress and insisting that her view is the only valid one and that there are no mitigating circumstances.

I'm not looking for suggestions. Divorcing her would accomplish nothing and she won't see a therapist. Nor will she listen to reason. Honestly, most of the time she is pleasant, loving and supportive.

And I sound like every other abused spouse in the history of the world.

One last thing, as of now 9% of this thread is me whining or someone being nice to me commiserating over my whining. I think that it's time I ceased to post in this thread except to encourage others. Posting for myself is accomplishing nothing.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on May 27, 2016, 09:46:31 am
Being yelled at for posting a thank you to Sweetie for 35 years of marriage (as of today) and telling her how much I love her and always will.
...................
The day got progressively worse. Sweetie told me this wasn't a marriage, that I'm not transgender, that my clothes are a slap in the face to her, that I've been unwilling to compromise,and that I had no consideration for her feelings at all. Only the marriage part is true and that only because she pushed me away in terms of physical affection, no hugs or kisses for example.
.................
This is a pattern with her, bringing up everything that's bothered her when she's under other stress and insisting that her view is the only valid one and that there are no mitigating circumstances.
.................

Sounds typical of many cis-women.  My wife is a example of that.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on June 07, 2016, 05:19:55 pm
Being treated like an irrelevance by the 'man' whose children I produced. All I want is someone to love me; who treats me like a valuable human being worthy of love, respect and consideration. Is that too much to ask?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: BlonT on June 08, 2016, 11:15:23 am
So sad to know that if we spend all that money, that now go to world power play and hard ware,there would be no hunger and toxic waste.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Tossu-sama on June 08, 2016, 03:27:20 pm
My stomach is acting up and while that might sound very small reason to be upset about, it's really uncalled for right now. I really can't afford to go down with stomach flu or some other c*ap because I have The Big Examination coming next Tuesday which will pretty much determine my graduation from this education.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: King Malachite on June 11, 2016, 11:29:52 pm
Having to kill a spider and a giant cockroach in my room in less than one hour. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kimberley Beauregard on June 12, 2016, 08:20:48 am
Metabolism's out of whack, no real confidence in my abilities and feeling out of my depth with this voluntary web design role I took up.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on June 12, 2016, 03:22:39 pm
My lab results came in, the pre-hormonal baseline ordered by my endocrinologist.  Pretty much what I'd expect, except for one little item.

Prolactin: 30 ng/mL  Normal range: 2-18 for males

It's at the high end of the female range, or the low end of the nursing mom range.  The estradiol is now on hold, but I'm continuing with the spirolactone.

I'm pretty sure I'm not nursing or pregnant.  :P

We'll retest tomorrow, early in the day before exercise. Fingers crossed.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: arice on June 12, 2016, 08:33:02 pm
My husband is having a really hard time dealing with my gender right now. He was being incredibly supportive until recently but is now going through a crisis over it. He says he is feeling like less of a man and is not sure he can cope with me transitioning... but that he takes his vows too seriously to cheat or leave me. Today it reached a crisis when he admitted to feeling suicidal. I am hurt for him and me and I'm really not sure what to do.

Sent from my SM-G870W using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 13, 2016, 04:37:55 am
For the last few days I've been feeling like my life has "jumped the shark". And what do you do when a show has done that?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on June 17, 2016, 06:24:04 pm
For the last few days I've been feeling like my life has "jumped the shark". And what do you do when a show has done that?
Do a spin off and try and get things going good again?
Sorry, just don't know what else to say.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 17, 2016, 06:39:35 pm
Thanks, Stevie, that's EXACTLY what you do. I was having a very bad birthday when I posted that. It did get better.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on June 17, 2016, 10:33:29 pm
Thanks, Stevie, that's EXACTLY what you do. I was having a very bad birthday when I posted that. It did get better.
Your quite welcome. I'm glad that things got better. I know some days I wonder why I go on, but life goes on and not everything sucks.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 18, 2016, 04:42:01 am
On my worst days, late at night or early-early in the morning I contemplate all the people who never met me who wish I didn't exist and wonder if that many people can be wrong. Eventually I remember that almost everyone who HAS met me really likes me and I get out of that paralyzing funk.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 18, 2016, 04:49:05 am
I've always thought you a pretty cool gal Dee

I get pretty down at times also, I definitely know about the paralyzing funk thing

Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Atom on June 18, 2016, 01:50:37 pm
Being 6 weeks into a chest infection. It refuses to go. Take these and come back in a few weeks.

May as well just douse my system in rum and kill it that way.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roses and Songs on June 18, 2016, 04:02:02 pm
   loneliness overdose, infinite paralizing lonehhkll panicgfc
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 18, 2016, 08:32:18 pm
Hugs, Roses! Remember that there are people here, no matter how far away, who care.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 18, 2016, 08:35:50 pm
For economic reasons I've been without estradiol since last Wednesday. Today I discovered that it will be at least until a week from this coming Thursday before I can refill it. I can already recognize old (despised) thought patterns returning. I'm not a happy girl right now! At least I still have plenty of spiro.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: kelly_1979 on June 19, 2016, 02:25:17 am
Among other things,
1)being to some degree in conflict with therapist but can't find another one
2)it's so damn hot these days - max ~41C (~106 F)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on June 19, 2016, 04:32:17 am
For economic reasons I've been without estradiol since last Wednesday. Today I discovered that it will be at least until a week from this coming Thursday before I can refill it. I can already recognize old (despised) thought patterns returning. I'm not a happy girl right now! At least I still have plenty of spiro.
I can relate to that. I was keeping my patches on extra long trying to make them last until I was able to afford them.
Lucky for me the free clinic was able to cover everything else so I only needed to come up with the money for patches.
Hope you get back on soon. Definitely don't like feeling the low.
Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on June 19, 2016, 05:16:26 am
My 2nd Father's Day without Dad. I still miss him even though he could be a PITA. I still expect a phone call from my sister telling me of his latest escapades (squaring up to a debt collector & offering to punch his lights out at 86!, kicked off Facebook for swearing, etc)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on June 19, 2016, 06:46:52 am
Thanks but it's too late for the call, he died in 2014. I hope you get to see your Dad again, I wish I'd spent more time with him while he was here
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roses and Songs on June 19, 2016, 08:27:14 am
Thanks but it's too late for the call, he died in 2014. I hope you get to see your Dad again, I wish I'd spent more time with him while he was here

I'm deeply sorry, I obviously misunderstood your first message. As for my dad, I'm not interested anymore, I have a new life now. Cheers, Rose.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Midnightstar on June 19, 2016, 09:05:57 am
Dissociated from the world around me
even when i speak to myself i don't see the courage or person i used to be its like i fell and am just willingly sitting there not getting up because i don't feel anything.
I'm existing, but nothings there.
I've been like this for days and its just worse.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Mariah on June 19, 2016, 09:12:50 am
I'm sorry your feeling that way right now. Maybe stepping back from what your doing right now and doing something else might help with that. Clearly something about what you have been or are doing is't working for you. It's resulting in the feel your having now. Hugs
Mariah
Dissociated from the world around me
even when i speak to myself i don't see the courage or person i used to be its like i fell and am just willingly sitting there not getting up because i don't feel anything.
I'm existing, but nothings there.
I've been like this for days and its just worse.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Atom on June 19, 2016, 10:57:46 am
I have not seen my Dad for around 20 years.  Some parents do not deserve the love of their children.

Back on topic:

Ebay screwing payments up, but that's a minor irk comparatively.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Eevee on June 19, 2016, 11:04:15 am
I try not to think of my parents because of how they treat me. Today is Father's day, so I can't get him off my mind. I'm already one massive panic attack into the day.  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roses and Songs on June 19, 2016, 11:30:24 am
I try not to think of my parents because of how they treat me. Today is Father's day, so I can't get him off my mind. I'm already one massive panic attack into the day.  :(

   Hello Eevee, I don't care about parents at all, but I would really like a friend to go out sometimes. Anyway, I see you talk about panic, if you feel like it send me a PM I would like to know how you deal with that.   Cheers, Rose.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 19, 2016, 05:25:38 pm
Father's Day tends to depress the stuff out of me  :-\  Think I'll just leave it at that though
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laura_Squirrel on June 19, 2016, 06:31:21 pm
Meh. I don't worry about that sort of stuff. As far as Father's Day is concerned: My dad and I haven't had any sort of real relationship for years now. Yeah, I may say 'hey' when I'm out at their house. But, it's pretty detached nowadays. It doesn't depress me, though. He pretty much screwed everything up with everyone in the family anyway. Oh, well. Life goes on.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on June 21, 2016, 11:56:14 am
Yeah, Father's Day is a depressing day. My ex has basically cut me off from my kids. Don't know what she says about me to them but I haven't talked with them in over a year. The fact that I lost my job and fell behind in child support doesn't help. Most depressing day of the year besides their birthday
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 24, 2016, 05:26:21 am
Broke my lil' pinky toe  :P  So now it's a lil' purpley toe
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on June 24, 2016, 05:49:13 am
Broke my lil' pinky toe  :P  So now it's a lil' purpley toe

What are you doing!!

I'm the one who threatens staff with breaking their bones!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 24, 2016, 06:11:25 am
What are you doing!!

I'm the one who threatens staff with breaking their bones!

LOL... Leaned my garden tools against a chair and took my shoes off after working in the garden then snagged my toe on the bow rake on my way into the washroom  :eusa_doh:

(http://www.ruralking.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/0/0/005071513.jpg)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on June 24, 2016, 06:22:18 am
What are you doing!!

I'm the one who threatens staff with breaking their bones!

LOL... Leaned my garden tools against a chair and took my shoes off after working in the garden then snagged my toe on the bow rake on my way into the washroom  :eusa_doh:

(http://www.ruralking.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/0/0/005071513.jpg)

Oh, we have all done that and it hurts a lot!

Ice packs!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roses and Songs on June 24, 2016, 07:48:00 am
LOL... Leaned my garden tools against a chair and took my shoes off after working in the garden then snagged my toe on the bow rake on my way into the washroom  :eusa_doh:


   It is indeed strange how irresistibly attracted toes and garden tools are, just like lemon juice and eyes, fingers and closing car doors, bottoms and toilet seats, headaches and heads, etc...

                                                                                              Get well, Rose.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on June 24, 2016, 05:59:37 pm
Yeah, Father's Day is a depressing day. My ex has basically cut me off from my kids. Don't know what she says about me to them but I haven't talked with them in over a year. The fact that I lost my job and fell behind in child support doesn't help. Most depressing day of the year besides their birthday


I am so sorry that happened to you.  :(  I can only imagine what the pain of not seeing my kids would be like. That is a fear of mine though. My partner's told me that he'd never take the kids away, but he also said he'd accept me only to turn around and misgender me and be passive-aggressive about me being trans, so I am pretty worried about what will happen as time goes by. Did your ex take your kids away only because you're trans? That's no reason to take somebody's children away from them. And not only is it harming you; Your children don't get to see you either and I'm sure that hurts them too. Have you been able to take her to court over this?  I hope that things work out for you and you do see them again. I've never understood why one parent intentionally tries to hurt the other by taking the kids like that.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on June 25, 2016, 04:02:34 am

I am so sorry that happened to you.  :(  I can only imagine what the pain of not seeing my kids would be like. That is a fear of mine though. My partner's told me that he'd never take the kids away, but he also said he'd accept me only to turn around and misgender me and be passive-aggressive about me being trans, so I am pretty worried about what will happen as time goes by. Did your ex take your kids away only because you're trans? That's no reason to take somebody's children away from them. And not only is it harming you; Your children don't get to see you either and I'm sure that hurts them too. Have you been able to take her to court over this?  I hope that things work out for you and you do see them again. I've never understood why one parent intentionally tries to hurt the other by taking the kids like that.
I think the transgender issues kind of sealed the deal.
In February of 15 I lost my job that was keeping me barely in a home and still paying child support. I was also stupid and bought a car in the previous year. Suddenly no job and no income and I'm screwed. My partner has been trying and failing to get disability and I've been trying to support us.
So a few months go by of cashing in 401k and selling things to stay afloat.
So time goes by and eventually I get a job at ups. It's hard work, but they don't discriminate, so I do that for a while. Unfortunately, most of my pay goes to the child support and in still running out of cash.
So, by now I've fallen behind in car payments and I wake up one day to find my car is repossessed. Now I can't even get to work and I'm back to scrambling for something for work.
Basically, when I finally got a car and started working again, delivering pizza, I've fallen far behind in support and I'm being evicted.
I went to a support hearing and was told pay 4000 in arrears in one month or go to jail. I begged my ex to adjust the monthly amount, because I don't make the money I once did and to at least forgive the arrears or adjust it because of how life has been for me the past year.
Somehow, she felt seeing me go to jail was in the kids best interest. So I took what money I had and have moved far away where I get to start all over once again.
I think because I owe her money and am in no position to make myself available to the state right now, she can just shut me out.
I think being trans HAS freaked her out, but I believe she's using money as the justification of cutting me out of their lives.

Sorry for the book, but that's the brief version. I'm afraid she's going to poison them against me and they'll never know how I tried to contact them. They'll just think that I didn't care and will hate me.
It's going to take some time to get myself in a position to fight her. I only hope it's not too late by then.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on June 25, 2016, 08:29:03 am
I think the transgender issues kind of sealed the deal.
In February of 15 I lost my job that was keeping me barely in a home and still paying child support. I was also stupid and bought a car in the previous year. Suddenly no job and no income and I'm screwed. My partner has been trying and failing to get disability and I've been trying to support us.
So a few months go by of cashing in 401k and selling things to stay afloat.
So time goes by and eventually I get a job at ups. It's hard work, but they don't discriminate, so I do that for a while. Unfortunately, most of my pay goes to the child support and in still running out of cash.
So, by now I've fallen behind in car payments and I wake up one day to find my car is repossessed. Now I can't even get to work and I'm back to scrambling for something for work.
Basically, when I finally got a car and started working again, delivering pizza, I've fallen far behind in support and I'm being evicted.
I went to a support hearing and was told pay 4000 in arrears in one month or go to jail. I begged my ex to adjust the monthly amount, because I don't make the money I once did and to at least forgive the arrears or adjust it because of how life has been for me the past year.
Somehow, she felt seeing me go to jail was in the kids best interest. So I took what money I had and have moved far away where I get to start all over once again.
I think because I owe her money and am in no position to make myself available to the state right now, she can just shut me out.
I think being trans HAS freaked her out, but I believe she's using money as the justification of cutting me out of their lives.

Sorry for the book, but that's the brief version. I'm afraid she's going to poison them against me and they'll never know how I tried to contact them. They'll just think that I didn't care and will hate me.
It's going to take some time to get myself in a position to fight her. I only hope it's not too late by then.

No need to apologize, Stevie. She sounds like a very transphobic person, cutting you out like that. What worries me about this situation is not only the torture she's putting you through... but if one of your kids ends up being trans too I hope she doesn't abuse them or just toss them out. What you're going through is hard, torturous in so many aspects. And I know this is probably easy for me to say but don't give up on your children. She could be trying to corrupt the way they see you, but maybe if they get to see for themselves how hard you're fighting, maybe they'll see through her. Then again I don't know how old your little ones are, or how much they've witnessed. Mine are only 1 and 2 and a half (and my step-child is seven, but I have no say in educating her on gender because of her mother...) so if my partner were to do this to me, my kids wouldn't know me and it'd be easier for them to believe him over me. None of this is your fault. I'm sorry for not being very helpful. I'm struggling with social anxiety and am not so good at giving advice. But when I see people go through injustices like this... it's beyond sickening. It's so enraging how we get punished simply for being trans...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Atom on June 25, 2016, 01:18:31 pm
I have a bomb load of studying to do as well as organise our move this week ( we only found out late Friday we had the keys).  Add to this a massive head cold and my motivation is rock bottom. Maybe tomorrow.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on June 26, 2016, 04:07:32 am
Cystitis
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on June 26, 2016, 11:19:38 pm
That thing between my legs is still there.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FreyasRedemption on June 27, 2016, 01:58:47 pm
Everything, really. My extended holiday is getting closer to the end, along with the summer, the only season that's worth living through where I live.
Given the circumstances, I officially don't have actual friends. Seeing my dad is becoming more difficult, since my mutual hatred with his wife is getting more active and visible.
Not to mention that my dysphoria has recently been a frequent visitor, and it just gets worse when I have something else to worry about beside it.


Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 28, 2016, 09:12:50 pm
Coffee maker died and leaked all over the kitchen counter and the floor this morning  :'(  Oh well, I probably needed to clean the counter and the floor anyway

But hey, I can still heat some water and use the filter cup and warmer plate to do the hand poured brew method  ;D

 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on June 29, 2016, 03:27:03 pm
I didn't get misgendered today, but I keep having flashbacks of times that I did...  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on June 29, 2016, 05:07:22 pm
Ear ache; had it since sat but since last night the pain has become unbearable. Thank god I found some prescription pain tablets in the medicine cupboard.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on June 29, 2016, 09:15:29 pm
My wife.  I reminded her of an upcoming therapy session, and asked if she'd like to schedule some joint sessions.  "No, I can't deal with this."  Um. Why is that?  "It's making me very anxious."  Well, that's what therapy would help with.  We're having trouble communicating, and that's not good.  "No, I can't have anything to do with this."  OK, would you consider joint therapy in the future?  "No, it would just make me anxious."

This isn't good.  I'm afraid this marriage will be another statistic in the Fail column soon.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 30, 2016, 06:10:18 am
Oh, Michelle, I'm so sorry!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 30, 2016, 01:38:10 pm
I've noticed that most folks really don't understand that part of getting hit by a car includes some permanent injuries which are often accompanied by migraine headaches and nausea

But then again I don't really like talking about it much so when someone acts like a rude jerk I just think to myself...

"Wow! What a jerk" and go on with other things
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on June 30, 2016, 11:18:08 pm
As usual, seeing that unneeded and unnecessary part.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on July 01, 2016, 09:06:02 am
I started my time of the month (technically three months cause I'm on the depo shot). I was irregular before I had kids so I didn't deal with it very often. Since having kids, it's been extremely painful and can last weeks at a time. Not only does my dysphoria sky rocket when this happens, my interstitial cystitis symptoms get worse too...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: SarahMarie1987 on July 01, 2016, 02:40:52 pm
This is more yesterday than today, but it has kind of bled over into today.

I woke up feeling awful. Not great. My anxiety and dysphoria were just too loud. Work was stressful since, we are behind with a lot of things at the moment. So it was kind of hard to get into work to get out of my head. I felt like crap for most of yesterday. I feel a tiny bit better today, but it is a small better. Mostly I need a hug really...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on July 02, 2016, 04:10:54 am
I know it's not the real thing, but I'll give you a hug.
If your ever in Albuquerque I'll replace that with the real thing
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on July 06, 2016, 06:17:05 pm
Been wrestling the insomnia monster and trying to keep the dark thoughts at bay  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on July 06, 2016, 06:36:43 pm
Had to unfriend more people on facebook because of a homophobic meme that was shared.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Tristyn on July 06, 2016, 07:30:17 pm
Just tired of being deadnamed by everyone. I think it's starting to get to me now.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on July 06, 2016, 11:27:28 pm
Just having a lousy day.  Bad cramps this morning, then a headache and hot flashes (!) right in the middle of group therapy.  (Low level alarm on hormones?  A month of spiro, and no estrogen makes Michelle a sad girl.)  On top of that, the group session was dominated by the three "senior" members lining up their surgeries.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on July 07, 2016, 04:21:13 am
It's my birthday and I cry if I want to. :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on July 07, 2016, 04:28:00 am
It's my birthday and I cry if I want to. :'(

Happy Birthday Honey!!!!

No need to cry!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on July 07, 2016, 02:01:16 pm
The black current  cheese cake I'd been looking forward to has turned into a science project
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Atom on July 07, 2016, 04:29:46 pm
One of my little girls friends got ill and didn't make it. I've had to explain death before but no one at the nursery had the words to tell her where her friend had gone. My own spent her first 10/days fighting for her life, so I've been to that nasty horrible door.
Day one of move. Everything went wrong. I'm still furious about it.
Night one of the move. I had to lock my self in the bathroom as the walls started vibrating. This means I'm about to pop in a massive way. And its not fair on my family.
Due to an injury, I had a tooth pulled today. 2 lots of local and that's all he could give me. I felt everything.  As someone familiar with martial arts, it feels like I've been punched in the right side of my face. Repeatedly.
Luckily, I'm on my 12th beer so that should haze out soon.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on July 10, 2016, 01:30:35 pm
The guy at Costa calling me buddy several times even though I'm 22  >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on July 10, 2016, 03:28:38 pm
The days I get misgendered, it ends up happening multiple times. This was one of those days...  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on July 11, 2016, 03:39:31 am
Really intense night terrors about committing suicide and a bunch of the stuff going on in the world
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roses and Songs on July 11, 2016, 08:14:57 am
3 or 4 days ago I put new pictures of myself that I took last week on a thread for that purpose. All those who did before me got at least a few feedbacks but I didn't, not one so today I'm hurt and I regret posting them, useless.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on July 20, 2016, 05:57:01 pm
Feeling like I'll never pass. Seeing that dude in the mirror. Hearing that low voice. What the hell am I thinking is the thought that's repeating in my head.
Who am I kidding.
Lots of internal negative feelings.
Transition sucks. Why can't you just listen to a self hypnosis tape and be done with it?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: roseyfox on July 20, 2016, 07:04:50 pm
My voice my horrid voice the main thing that people will notice and will go from thinking i am female to male. It like i thought you were a girl till you talked. this sucks but all well.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: southprince on July 20, 2016, 07:23:22 pm
Not knowing if my girlfriend will still accept me & want to be with me if I go ahead with my transition.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on July 20, 2016, 11:11:16 pm
Kind of unhappy but a bit more irked than anything  :icon_blah:

Often when someone passes away some/all of their personal belongings are donated to the local thrift store unless otherwise claimed by a relative or close personal friend

Well, a friend of mine who kinda likes Asian things bought what they thought to be a small house plant planter of sorts at the local thrift store and came over to show it to me

They then proceeded to tell me that they had to clean it out real good because it was full of ashes  :eusa_doh:

I didn't have the heart to tell them what they had just done with someone's ashes and told them how beautiful the plant is
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on July 22, 2016, 11:22:22 am
I've done two Prides this month (most recently two weeks ago) and my family always reacts badly whenever I do them: they alienate me and I wind up feeling isolated. It's as if they feel I don't deserve any happiness or self-esteem in my life, and as soon as I do anything to assert myself or try to improve my lot, they have to try to stamp all over it to keep me down. Their disgraceful behaviour has set off my Asperger's symptoms and has made me feel very withdrawn and unable (& unwilling) to communicate with anyone. All because I'm not able to understand how people are deliberately cruel to other people, and I don't have the social skills to defend myself against their abuse.

Usually, I just get angry at my family for treating me this way and they go down yet another notch in my estimation, but this time I found myself feeling very badly hurt. I was wondering why it had affected me as deeply as it has, and then I discovered the reason: Shark Week has decided to pay me an unwelcome visit, and on my ex's birthday no less. Progesterone makes me feel miserable, and for the last week or so I've been suffering its horrible effects without even realising.

So being trans not only gives my family a convenient reason to abuse me... it also gives me some messed-up hormones that make their abuse feel much worse than it needs to be.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Devlyn on July 22, 2016, 11:46:52 am
Kind of unhappy but a bit more irked than anything  :icon_blah:

Often when someone passes away some/all of their personal belongings are donated to the local thrift store unless otherwise claimed by a relative or close personal friend

Well, a friend of mine who kinda likes Asian things bought what they thought to be a small house plant planter of sorts at the local thrift store and came over to show it to me

They then proceeded to tell me that they had to clean it out real good because it was full of ashes  :eusa_doh:

I didn't have the heart to tell them what they had just done with someone's ashes and told them how beautiful the plant is

Just think how well the plant would have grown...<running away>  >:-)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Atom on July 23, 2016, 11:06:59 pm
We had a social worker turn up yesterday.

Turns out one of the staff at her former nursery took time out to go down to our local child services and complain they had proof I hit my daughter or handled her violently.

She had 6/7 bruises on her lower back caused by her using a slide there. Which they've said has been out of use for months.  As that's an outright lie, and I abhorre all violence towards children, extremely mad. We also pointed out at the start of the week she had bruising which occurred in the 6 hours she left us for their care.

Social worker dismissed the idea she had been hurt by me, so did a paediatrician. But they have to investigate and the nursery is now in the spotlight. It already lost its OFSTED rating for being inadequate, mainly around the supervision of children and training of staff.

I've responded by placing a Subject Access Request for all video footage of my daughters sessions (CCTV in every room) and all her paperwork, their observations etc.

Furious isnt the word, so I am now going to destroy this place.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on July 25, 2016, 05:34:13 am
A friend of mine has been made the victim of a transphobic hate crime which puts both him and his young kids at serious risk of harm.

A stranger has spread a false story on social media alleging that he attacked an elderly lady in his neighbourhood. They used his photo alongside a photo of some random elderly lady with facial injuries which they'd plucked from a totally unconnected foreign news article. They even found out his deadname & added that to the story, calling him a 'woman'. The post was up for several hours, during which time it was shared & commented on by hundreds of highly irate people - including people who recognised him because their kids go to the same school as his kids.

He's terrified. He got the post taken down but the damage has already been done. He has contacted the police, but they won't look into this until Friday and in the meantime, he's scared to show his face in public. And all through no fault of his own.

This is why I'm as stealth as possible. There are some crazy, vindictive people out there who would just love to mess up our lives simply because they have nothing better to do.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on July 25, 2016, 09:13:24 am
The fact that I post to this thread so much that when it recycled I became the starter.

The fact that I noticed how much I post in this thread and now I feel uncomfortable if I post anything here.

The fact that right now many of you are thinking "it's OK. If you need to post here than you need to."

The fact that I feel that I'm not worth your time.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on July 25, 2016, 08:18:36 pm
Another day, another time to get misgendered by the people that matter most to me... it hurts the most when it's somebody close to you doing it.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on July 30, 2016, 02:32:18 am
With all the nonsense going on at work and being there for everyone, no one is there for me to turn to. :'(
Had a bad day yesterday as got to a breaking point.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on July 30, 2016, 07:14:43 pm
Just had someone dump their chair on my toes. Wasn't wearing shoes. Extremely pained smile and suppress urge to remark on clumsiness overload activated.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on August 01, 2016, 04:10:50 am
Various things that are making me rather sad and upset that I can't really say or do much about other than trying to keep hope alive and hanging on in quiet desperation 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on August 02, 2016, 08:15:36 am
Woke up feeling like that this morning. I've been having a hard time coping with all the negativity in my life and in the lives of people around the world too.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on August 06, 2016, 05:14:04 am
Work continues to be a nightmare. How much worse can it get?

So decide to get a new toaster today, my old one is just well old but works fine 20 years old plus.
Get a nice new one and plug it in and nothing, zilch???
Look online for reviews and issues and it seems all new toasters are just rubbish.

Warning to all don't by it as it is a waste of money. I know I will.
If everyone avoided it, perhaps things might change.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on August 06, 2016, 05:49:11 am
Work continues to be a nightmare. How much worse can it get?

So decide to get a new toaster today, my old one is just well old but works fine 20 years old plus.
Get a nice new one and plug it in and nothing, zilch???
Look online for reviews and issues and it seems all new toasters are just rubbish.
Warning to all don't by it as it is a waste of money. I know I will.
If everyone avoided it, perhaps things might change.

Yeah sure, avoid it sounds a good idea

Maybe you can take it back for a refund or exchange, did you save the receipt? 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on August 08, 2016, 11:45:22 pm
I keep having to deal with people in my life who tell me they accept me, then tell me that everybody would be happier if I stayed closeted. I'm starting to think that they'll all be happier if I'm dead...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on August 10, 2016, 02:17:10 pm
I've been playing ring around the rosey with Verizon for the past week. They sent me a DSL self install kit. I installed it and told them that the line is dead and I needed a tech. They agreed and scheduled one. Someone decided they knew better and cancelled the tech. Today was the third attempt and there was absolutely no charm involved. Unfortunately they and Optimum are my only options and we already gave up on Optimum.

And our cell tower isn't good so hot spots are spotty.

On the plus side, this is the first post I've had in this thread that wasn't about my marriage.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on August 10, 2016, 07:35:57 pm
...Dealt with more emotional abuse from my partner today. It took me five years to realize that what he is doing is abusive, even though none of it is physical. It hurts because I still have love for him, but I really don't think I can handle this crap much longer. On top of having the gender dysphoria beat me down spiritually, mentally and emotionally, I get to deal with the person who is supposed to be there for me do the same thing. I don't even feel like eating tonight and I'm usually a big eater. I just feel too dumb to be alive and that my existence is a burden...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Eevee on August 11, 2016, 03:46:15 am
I was going on a walk tonight with my boyfriend and some assholes yelled the usual trans slurs at me as they drove by. That was supposed to be a relaxing walk. Now I'm in tears.  :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on August 11, 2016, 10:28:25 am
I was going on a walk tonight with my boyfriend and some assholes yelled the usual trans slurs at me as they drove by. That was supposed to be a relaxing walk. Now I'm in tears.  :'(

Transphobic idiots like that ruin so many good moments for us. If only they knew what it was like to be harassed and have your identity denied. =(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on August 14, 2016, 04:28:14 pm
Hacking up blood  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on August 16, 2016, 04:40:12 pm
I'm starting the education of a staunch religious zealot, who also happens to be a very dear friend, all the while trying not to out myself. Bleugh.

Sno.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on August 20, 2016, 12:38:36 am
Nearly got hit by a car, which of course dredged up some bad memories  :P  Managed to dive out of the way of the vehicle but landed rather hard and got drenched by the wet grass I slid across

I'll be okay but hurtin' pretty good for the moment
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on August 20, 2016, 07:47:47 am
Nearly got hit by a car, which of course dredged up some bad memories  :P  Managed to dive out of the way of the vehicle but landed rather hard and got drenched by the wet grass I slid across

I'll be okay but hurtin' pretty good for the moment

Ouch. Good to hear you're okay. So many people on the road just shouldn't be driving in the first place.


What made me unhappy this morning? I'm dreading a wedding I have to attend today. Nobody there but my partner knows I'm trans, so because he's part of the wedding party I have to conform to cis norms and wear a dress and makeup. I'll keep this site and the people on here in mind so that I know I'm not alone.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Atom on August 20, 2016, 07:18:13 pm
Bleeding from the rear again. Something that's happened on and off and doctors are trying to work it out at the moment. Nothing says amazing like soaking through your trousers.

Some amazingly bright teenagers shouting profanities at my little girl for carrying a Sky plush (from Paw Patrol) and a Pikachu bag on her back.  Calling a 3 year old "<Not Permitted> dumb" and then laughing at her when she cries takes the biscuit.

I did that horrible thing of looking over my glasses and saying "EXCUSE ME...?". Job done, still have my work voice is seems.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alice-jones on August 20, 2016, 07:30:52 pm
it may not seam like a big deal after reading what you all have been through.
But the thing that made me unhappy today was that i laddered my favorite stockings this morning

Most days i feel unhappy about the state of the world and what mankind infilcts on mankind

Why can we not all get on with each other and be kind and helpful to others

Alice x
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Atom on August 20, 2016, 08:26:08 pm
Alice, it's horses for courses.  My OH bought a brand new swanky eyeliner the other day, the sort you look at and go "how much for that??"

Our daughter flushed it down the toilet.  Sometimes, it's those little things that do it - and that's all it takes.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on August 20, 2016, 09:10:28 pm
Where to begin. Where to begin. Having a dysphoria week, generally not good. Compounded by friends who will only gather at ours *because it's the only house big enough*, who were all around yesterday evening, for a meal, that I spent time and love preparing, for conversations to roll round to we must have a gals weekend (invite for partner), and the other AMaB, invited to the guys weekend, and no invite for me.

100 ways to make me feel invisible.

Thanks. :(

I now just feel like what is the point.

Sno.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Atom on August 20, 2016, 09:14:33 pm
Sno, you could happily share some homemade focaccia bread and some stirling craft beers with us if that helps =]
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on August 21, 2016, 02:51:14 am
Atom,

that would be great, some olives, homemade hummus, maybe a soft cheese or two, and some cured fish/ meats.

Thanks :)

Sno
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on August 21, 2016, 04:37:10 am
It's a shame we're all spread apart. I have an idea, but I'll start a new thread. Watch for it!
(Prompted by Atom & Sno)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: NordicSofia on August 21, 2016, 06:53:48 am
Slight cold. Can't hit the gym or track, just have to sit home.

Well, I think it will go away soon anyway.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: kelly_1979 on August 21, 2016, 11:54:38 am
My mother keeps talking down to me...mostly about things she doesn't like etc....

I'm sick of it...why can't she just drop it?

Can't she understand she's just making me even more stressed?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on August 23, 2016, 03:44:46 am
Woke up to discover that Shark Week has decided to pay me a visit.

Then went out to my car, and discovered that some reprobate has decided to key it.

Why are people like that? My car is the only nice thing I have in my otherwise hellish life. And just because it's nice, some jealous idiot decided that that needed to be damaged too.

I honestly hate humans sometimes.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gemini on August 24, 2016, 05:31:35 pm
I was going on a walk tonight with my boyfriend and some assholes yelled the usual trans slurs at me as they drove by. That was supposed to be a relaxing walk. Now I'm in tears.  :'(

That kind of thing is why I'm afraid to go full time. It's a terrible feeling, when people treat you like you're not human. Yet I know I'm giving up opportunities to make real connections with people.

Doing something as simple as going for a walk takes a surprising amount of courage, for us. I hope you didn't waste too many tears over those transphobic idiots.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FreyasRedemption on August 27, 2016, 10:39:40 am
Everything, really. I've been seriously depressed since yesterday. I missed out on a Pride event because of this cursed social anxiety. I can't talk to my mother, since everything she says just makes me feel worse about myself. And it's my birthday tomorrow. Screw that, I don't want to celebrate having been born when I'm feeling like I shouldn't have.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on August 27, 2016, 06:56:33 pm
Spinal injuries playing up again and affecting my motor functions and ability to walk

The pain is intense with each year becoming more difficult and the prospect of becoming wheel chair bound frightens the stuff out of me, not sure I can deal with living this way anymore
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on August 27, 2016, 11:06:12 pm
My hopefully soon Ex Wife said, when talking about her masculine features and behaviour: "This is who I am, I can't change that!" But still tells me that I *made the choice* to become a woman. Her facial expression showing such extreme disgust, that I want to jump and claw at that face.

She just doesn't want to understand and then wonders and is pissed that I treat her like she treats me.

Like a friend of her already said a few years ago, she became narrow minded. I'm wondering how narrow it can become?

I would be so glad to just remove that person from my life altogether but it's not possible due to our daughter and I'm worried about that.

Thanks for letting me vent...

Gesendet von meinem SM-N915FY mit Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on August 28, 2016, 09:55:50 am
I'm still cranky about that nurse constantly misgendering me at the hospital, even with my record tagged with my name and gender identification, and after I corrected her.

Being tethered with this damn catheter isn't helping, either.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on August 29, 2016, 08:37:22 am
I should be happy, right? I found a great nail polish, it's almost the color of watermelon. I found $20 in my purse while cleaning it out. Just one bad dream that points out a bad possibility that I've been trying not to think about because I can't affect the outcome has me in a funk. I think I'm too sensitive.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: King Malachite on August 29, 2016, 12:32:27 pm
Broken heart, and I don't make enough money to qualify for Medicaid..
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on August 30, 2016, 10:46:03 pm
I'm still tethered, wife and daughter here in the house full-time now as neither is working, and I can't be myself at all (I'm out, but it would be a violation of The Rules here).  It's really starting to get to me. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on August 31, 2016, 03:50:45 pm
Heart broken because of the hurt and anger my daughter is experiencing due to the separation.

I's almost 11pm her and we had a lot of screaming and crying. 😢

Gesendet von meinem SM-N915FY mit Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on August 31, 2016, 04:33:00 pm
I'm still tethered, wife and daughter here in the house full-time now as neither is working, and I can't be myself at all (I'm out, but it would be a violation of The Rules here).  It's really starting to get to me. :(

That's pretty much where I'm at now too. I'm not out to my step-daughter yet because my partner and the few people that know are set in their ways and believe it would confuse and hurt her. Meanwhile I know that 7 is a very open-minded age. It hurts that I probably won't be able to tell her the truth until the transphobic and homophobic values of cis-het society get drilled into her head. What hurts even more is what my partner said about our sons. They're only 1 and 3 and my partner once told me something along the lines of "be prepared for them to resent you". It hurt worse than a slap in the face. I wish that everyone was kind and accepting of all people so nobody would have to feel the pain of their true self being denied.

Thinking about that and having flashbacks of the emotional abuse in my life has got me down today. It seems as if everyone who has been really close to me has been abusive in some aspect. My partner has been extremely jealous in the past and when he's had spurts of jealousy, he erases my pansexuality and trans identity, making me out to be a cisgender straight woman that's going to sleep with every cis man, non-passing trans woman, and passing trans man in sight. I've never cheated on him and this kind of erasure is extremely painful to deal with... it's why I still haven't made the effort to make any trans friends offline. The ironic, but not surprising thing about all this is my partner has actually cheated on me multiple times. He's gotten mad at me when I confronted him, he's come up with excuses sometimes, and has gotten angry and blamed me other times. He calls me names and makes fun of me when he gets mad. Lately I've been thinking that there have been more negative things than positive things in this relationship. Onto other "close relationships" -- my parents have both taken turns telling me I can tell them anything, then getting mad at me when I try to talk about things that have been bothering me. My mom tells me to "just shelf" my trans identity and that "there's a reason why people wait until they're old to transition". My dad has more in common with my partner than my partner would like to admit. He's kind when things are going good, but when he gets mad he sees red and doesn't hold back. He called me a "white trash retard" when he found out I was pregnant with my first son. When I tried exploring my identity when I was 15 in 2005, he made it out that me being trans would ruin my family's lives and reputations. Got shoved back in the closet for ten years and my dad probably still thinks it was "all just a phase". I'm gonna regret not coming out to him again if something happens to him before then. My sister who has been the most supportive and is one of my closest offline friends wasn't like that at all when we were kids. She'd bully me verbally and did everything she could to make me cry. She'd call me names, tell me how stupid I was when I'd ask questions. The weird thing is now she doesn't remember much of it. I however, remember a lot, but I wish I could forget. My partner sometimes says the same hurtful things my sister would say when he thinks I do/say something stupid.

I'm not sure if I feel any better after that vent. I got some stuff off my chest, but now I feel stupid, incompetent and like a waste of everyone's time. I'm struggling to survive this for my kids' sake. I want to raise them to be kind people who are accepting. And if any of them turn out to be trans, I've gotta be there to help them through the struggle. They certainly won't get that support from their dad or their grandparents...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on September 01, 2016, 12:29:21 pm
You are not stupid! Nor are you incompetent! You have people trying to make something you can't help your fault, in some cases probably because they fear it's theirs. As to your cheating SO, cheaters often accuse their partners of cheating. It makes them feel less guilty.

Listen carefully. All of these people know exactly what buttons to push to get you to dance to their tune. They're not concerned about you, they're concerned about themselves. They want you to feel stupid and helpless so they can keep controlling you.

Sorry if that's a bit harsh. I see this happening to my trans siblings way too often. For anyone here who doubts, trans siblings are all of you.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: WarGrowlmon1990 on September 05, 2016, 07:14:51 pm
You are not stupid! Nor are you incompetent! You have people trying to make something you can't help your fault, in some cases probably because they fear it's theirs. As to your cheating SO, cheaters often accuse their partners of cheating. It makes them feel less guilty.

Listen carefully. All of these people know exactly what buttons to push to get you to dance to their tune. They're not concerned about you, they're concerned about themselves. They want you to feel stupid and helpless so they can keep controlling you.

Sorry if that's a bit harsh. I see this happening to my trans siblings way too often. For anyone here who doubts, trans siblings are all of you.

Thanks Dee. Your comment wasn't harsh at all, it made my day today. I've been trying to overcome this harder than ever for my kids' sake but some days are harder than others. I ended up having a calmer conversation with my partner about his jealousy and he seems to be opening his eyes more. It all started when we went to his friend's wedding a few weeks ago. That night was bad enough for me because I had to go back in the closet and wear a dress (I'm not out to everyone and he wanted to keep his reputation up). When I was talking to his cousin who is one of his best friends I looked at him for too long and that caused my partner's jealousy to rear its ugly head again -- after a whole year of no jealousy incidents. I'll admit that I can be just plain weird sometimes because of my social anxiety. Sometimes I straight up do not know how to interact with people. I can go from not making any eye contact at all to being a weirdo who does not break eye contact at all and awkwardly stares. I can see where my partner came from but at the same time we've had multiple conversations over this and he knows how awkward I can be. If I were a cis guy I'd be the awkward kid in school that girls would be too freaked out to talk to. It was the first time I really defended myself and I didn't beat around the bush or stay silent in defeat as I usually do. I told him that his feelings were because of his jealousy and that he wouldn't feel like that if he trusted me. Since we had that argument I felt like I was stuck in this situation and that he'd never change. But a couple days ago he told me that I can be friends with anybody as long as they're good with kids. I think me telling him how hurtful him not trusting me and me calling him out really got through to him. I can tell he's trying but he still misgenders me and I have a feeling that we may not be together in the long run. It might be sooner than later that it'll end because I really don't need to put up with any more emotional abuse. I went through enough of that with my parents. The difference between him and my parents is he seems to be actively trying and attempting to educate himself on this. My parents are set in their ways and my mom still insists that I never come out again to my dad. They're also the type to believe that they are always in the right, something that lots of emotional abusers seem to think.

Today wasn't too emotionally draining, but I was having some major bladder flares which isn't much better. Having interstitial cystitis along with severe gender dysphoria isn't making this any easier. I also got a message from a friend on this site that was very concerning. It's as if when some of us start getting better, others start to languish. Any time I hear about another transgender person commiting suicide I feel helpless and guilty because I want to help this community and prevent lives from being lost. But it's impossible to help when you've got a chronic illness and no extra funds to help out. I still feel guilty for not donating to this forum yet.  :-\
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on September 11, 2016, 07:55:23 pm
Attempting to educate an RE teacher friend, who mis-pronoun'd Alexis Arquette, and complained that the articles and statements from her family had been mis-pronouning her...

Sno
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on September 11, 2016, 08:45:22 pm
Remembering a dear friend on 9/11  :'( 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Virelai on September 19, 2016, 10:16:07 pm
School.

I'm eternally grateful to be back in college, and for the degree I really want. However, with my circumstances of being trans and not being able to do a single thing about it (I joined a decade ago and have been frozen all of that time), being in college and being in the music department is making me more dysphoric than I had to experience the last several years, and there's nothing I can do about it.

The Aural Theory professor (who I must note is a great professor with a very fun personality) divides up singing by sex a lot during class, and every single time it happens I am very close to being brought to tears, and I can't focus on singing or anything.

Yet I sit here knowing that there is not a single thing I can do. I can not even begin to think of transitioning, so my suffering is "shallow" and meaningless. He can't alter the way he does things for the one student in his class that is 'offended' and not even transitioning. And I wouldn't dare speak up because I'm just grateful to even be here, back in college.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: VickyEU on October 02, 2016, 09:36:31 am
Waking up with the sensation of have thrown away the last 10 years of my life, "lol".
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on October 05, 2016, 05:30:17 am
Everything is annoying me at the moment.

Work I can't stand and I need to get out of there asap.
Hate all the managers as they are useless.
Never had any recognition for all the $ I have brought in or new product built.
All the wasted 1,000's of hours unpaid overtime over the years.
What for? absolutely nothing.
Sitting next to people who eat worse than pig and eat all day. Disgusting.
Have to work with other locations who refuse to work a minute longer and force us to overlap always to cover.

All in all I hate life at the moment. >:( >:( >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on October 11, 2016, 10:38:23 am
School.

I'm eternally grateful to be back in college, and for the degree I really want. However, with my circumstances of being trans and not being able to do a single thing about it (I joined a decade ago and have been frozen all of that time), being in college and being in the music department is making me more dysphoric than I had to experience the last several years, and there's nothing I can do about it.

The Aural Theory professor (who I must note is a great professor with a very fun personality) divides up singing by sex a lot during class, and every single time it happens I am very close to being brought to tears, and I can't focus on singing or anything.

Yet I sit here knowing that there is not a single thing I can do. I can not even begin to think of transitioning, so my suffering is "shallow" and meaningless. He can't alter the way he does things for the one student in his class that is 'offended' and not even transitioning. And I wouldn't dare speak up because I'm just grateful to even be here, back in college.
It would be great if your singing voice was in the traditional female range; he would have to include you with the girls.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Fresas con Nata on October 24, 2016, 01:32:16 pm
Went to the GIC today. No real progress. Last time, 2 months ago, the guy (psychologist) gave me a test (MCMI-III) and today I returned it, filled in of course. Today he gave me a bit of homework, need to talk about my past sentimental relationships and blah blah.

Next appointment in FEBRUARY :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on October 24, 2016, 01:36:52 pm
Went to the GIC today. No real progress. Last time, 2 months ago, the guy (psychologist) gave me a test (MCMI-III) and today I returned it, filled in of course. Today he gave me a bit of homework, need to talk about my past sentimental relationships and blah blah.

Next appointment in FEBRUARY :(

Which GIC is it?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Fresas con Nata on October 25, 2016, 11:19:15 am
Which GIC is it?

Ramón y Cajal hospital in Madrid, Spain. Yesterday I was angry, today I feel empty and depressed.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on October 25, 2016, 12:47:03 pm
Ramón y Cajal hospital in Madrid, Spain. Yesterday I was angry, today I feel empty and depressed.

Sorry to hear that. Probably not what you want to hear but time will go so much faster than you think it will. Think about where you were a year ago and where you are now. My GIC appointment probably won't be until May so I understand the feeling of impatience and unhappiness.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on October 27, 2016, 01:02:19 am
Went to a Harley owners group event, totally ignored like I was invisible. I was the only 1 who came on a bike though. A load of posers dressed up like Sons of Anarchy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on October 27, 2016, 04:11:27 pm
I called a local lawyer and made an appointment for a mediated divorce conference.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on October 28, 2016, 03:38:11 pm
To hear all the swearwords my daughter uses to describe her mother. Neither of them deserves this situation. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on November 09, 2016, 06:52:05 am
I'm terrified. I don't think I need to explain why.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on November 09, 2016, 08:46:18 am
I'm terrified. I don't think I need to explain why.

Same here *hug*
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 09, 2016, 01:52:51 pm
I woke up to another day of this stupid messed up world
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Fresas con Nata on November 09, 2016, 03:06:34 pm
Having one of those "WHAT THE **** AM I DOING?!?!?!!!?!" days. Gosh the inner voice won't stop. Decreased performance at work due to that.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: roseyfox on November 09, 2016, 04:39:09 pm
Got blown off by two friends in one day. As my mom yells at me about hanging out with my friends to much. When it the first time i been out in months. More depress then unhappy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: GlobalPessimum on November 09, 2016, 06:36:36 pm
I've been procrastinating and lazying about all day today. That's what's getting me down.

Alright, no, the truth is I did do a little bit of work today, doing some research for a potential contracting position. But there wasn't much to do anyway, so I mostly spent my day lying on my couch and fooling around on the internets.

I've left my job a couple of months ago to finish a university course and then have a bit of a holiday, and, well, I'm unemployed for the first time in 6 years and it's doing my head in a bit. I would look for work but there's a chance I might get something new in a few months time and I don't want to start something else just to ditch it as soon as my other (much preferred) option comes up. At the same time, I dont' know if the other option will be open.

It's a bit of a sticky mess. I'm trying to keep myself occupied but it's getting a bit difficult.

Also, need to get out more.

tl;dr: Nothing to do with my time.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on November 09, 2016, 06:50:24 pm
I think I'm suffering PTSD from this election. Maybe I'm just terrified and slightly dead inside, but that may be the same
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 09, 2016, 07:24:32 pm
Feeling concerned for a friend, they are a dear friend whom I hold a great deal of respect for

Unfortunately I fear that they are being "sucked in" by someone who I trust about as much as a weasel in a hen house

There isn't really much I can do but be patient and hope she will see through this other person's destructively controlling nature

One can hope anyway, right?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: clarissa jade on November 09, 2016, 09:45:24 pm
My dad making me angry today,still wont accept Clarissa which is my female side in and won't even try coming to terms about it.My mom told him put the effort in at least.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on November 10, 2016, 06:34:55 am
One of my daughters actually told me that she is a TERF and that Germaine Greer is one of her heroes. I know my daughter is a feminist, so I pointed out that Feminist theory has moved on a heck of a lot since the bra-burning, all-men-are-evil stuff of the 1970s (which was essential back then but times have changed!) and there are far better, more modern, more enlightened feminists than Greer to follow; Greer is stuck in a 1970s time warp. As a feminist my daughter should be in support of all women, shouldn't she?

Her response: "Of course I support all women. I just don't support those who are men".

Crikey moses, you'd think after four years of my transition the girl would have a bit more of a clue, wouldn't you? I chalk it up to teenage rebellion & I don't doubt she'll mature in time. But it's bloody painful at the moment. I went through labour to be subjected to this. :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laura_Squirrel on November 10, 2016, 02:38:03 pm
Even though any potential damage that could be done as far as the current medical insurance situation goes is a few months away at the most. I am terrified about losing access to my medications. If that happens, I am back to where I was a few years ago. If I get thrown back into this situation, I won't be around to see my next birthday. I can't deal with the idea of going back to that hell again.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on November 10, 2016, 03:34:17 pm
Gatekeeper doctors...

I desperately need letters for a court ordered name & gender change so I can get my papers done before the executive orders that enable this without full SRS and a psych board are cancelled.

Naturally the doc doesn't care about this, or the WPATH standards.

And now I'm about to be saved from the terrible burden of medical insurance.

Not a happy girl today.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on November 11, 2016, 11:13:43 pm
Still having that disgusting thing.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 15, 2016, 08:53:16 pm
Being reminded that there is more than just one weasel at play
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sephirah on November 24, 2016, 03:08:11 pm
Just been going through my PM's. It's been a long time.

Realised I never deleted any from Nero.

...

Damn. Talk about a punch in the gut. You think you can deal with something but when it comes to it, you really can't.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Mariah on November 24, 2016, 03:13:06 pm
Huggles
Just been going through my PM's. It's been a long time.

Realised I never deleted any from Nero.

...

Damn. Talk about a punch in the gut. You think you can deal with something but when it comes to it, you really can't.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on November 24, 2016, 04:50:03 pm
Being told I cannot change my name because the country I have lived in for the last 30 years still considers me temporary resident except of course for the purposes of paying government taxes and fee's and being a good little citizen. Which I can do as long as I want...I can even retire her and collect the pension I just can't change my name.  I now have to become a citizen of this country which is fine if they grant it...if they don't then I am not sure what I can do, if anything, about it...very very distressing thought at the prospect of never ever being able to be recognized as who I am whilst I continue to live in the country I have called home for 30 years...I have one avenue open to me...I am pursuing this now but it could take 6 months or 6 years i just don't know.   :( :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Fresas con Nata on November 25, 2016, 06:08:58 am
Next appointment in FEBRUARY :(

One month has passed and I'm still battling against this. A side of me wants to throw some coins to private psychologists.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 29, 2016, 01:17:31 am
Snow  :P  BLAH!!! snow... It's freakin' freezing cold here
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on November 29, 2016, 01:55:05 am
hating snow is a sign of growing old, used to love it as a kid & now it's a PITA!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sowilo on December 09, 2016, 06:53:00 pm
Someone saying horrible things, about a friend who I love and care deeply for :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on December 10, 2016, 01:14:13 am
Pulled a muscle in my right thigh
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on December 10, 2016, 03:32:22 am
My (still) wife accused me of being the (using male version of the german word) only one who is transphobic, because of me hidding "it" in many areas of my life. Especially work (self-employed) and my from dementia suffering mother.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: kk on December 14, 2016, 04:49:05 am
My girl and I are getting ready to move to a new town, new jobs, etc, so things have been very stressful.  My identity exploration has been put on hold because I just don't have time for it right now, but today at work my brain was suddenly, "Hey, remember your friend dysphoria?  Let's obsess on that all day and get no work done!"  So that's been fun.  Feeling like I'm going in circles again but resolving to really look into things and explore my gender in the new year, once we get settled and things calm down.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Saison Marguerite on December 15, 2016, 09:41:14 pm
I logged in here for the first time in many months with a notification for 5 messages and I was excited. They were all automated from Susan.  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Selena on December 15, 2016, 10:08:21 pm
Had a complete break down at work. Crying, pain in my whole body, and, for the first time in my life, seriously contemplating ending everything. I'm shift supervisor at a fast food place and was closing the store (so technically this was last night). I can usually displace the horrible feelings with a healthy supply of sarcasm. Its hard to be sad when everyone is laughing. :) The problem is that when the feelings hit I was all alone. I texted my girlfriend who just happens to be the manager of the same store(yes its awkward but at least I don't face discrimination at work). She had to come down and help me. I was completely paralyzed with despair. It is the worst it's ever been.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Fresas con Nata on December 19, 2016, 01:34:55 pm
The sensation of being half baked made me unhappy today. This constant need of shaving daily, of hiding the male parts, of using a wig… or having nothing more than air under the bra. I was shaving to go out and get some stuff done but I suddenly felt I was faking my feminity, so decided to leave things for "tomorrow" and spent the evening in bed. I can't wait for finishing the electrolysis and having longer hair, for getting out of bed and look like a woman already. (Not to mention HRT of course but this wasn't the trigger today).
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on December 19, 2016, 03:03:59 pm
Had a complete break down at work. Crying, pain in my whole body, and, for the first time in my life, seriously contemplating ending everything. I'm shift supervisor at a fast food place and was closing the store (so technically this was last night). I can usually displace the horrible feelings with a healthy supply of sarcasm. Its hard to be sad when everyone is laughing. :) The problem is that when the feelings hit I was all alone. I texted my girlfriend who just happens to be the manager of the same store(yes its awkward but at least I don't face discrimination at work). She had to come down and help me. I was completely paralyzed with despair. It is the worst it's ever been.

Hi Selena

I hope you are feeling a little better today?

Hugs
Liz
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Selena on December 19, 2016, 11:30:39 pm
Hi Selena

I hope you are feeling a little better today?

Hugs
Liz

Thanks Liz.

Everything is ok now. I'm really afraid of being alone though. I don't completely trust that I will be ok but I'm going to make it one day at a time. Since I came out it has been really difficult to ignore things I used to be able to. I feel like i'll be in a better place once I start the medical part of the transition. I have an appointment on the 27th with my primary to discuss what options I have available. I do have a therapist lined up but she wasn't available until January. So these are both things to look forward to.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Tossu-sama on December 24, 2016, 03:46:34 am
It's Christmas eve and one of our older rats died in my arms couple hours ago.

If this is life's idea of a joke, it's a horrible one.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on December 24, 2016, 04:18:59 am
It's Christmas eve and one of our older rats died in my arms couple hours ago.

If this is life's idea of a joke, it's a horrible one.

Aww; really sorry to hear that :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on December 24, 2016, 07:39:22 am
It's Christmas eve and one of our older rats died in my arms couple hours ago.

If this is life's idea of a joke, it's a horrible one.
I'm sorry - I feel your pain!
When I was a child my rabbit died on the evening of Dec. 23rd. 😐


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on December 24, 2016, 06:37:26 pm
It's Christmas eve and one of our older rats died in my arms couple hours ago.

If this is life's idea of a joke, it's a horrible one.

That's a horrible way to start the Holiday season, Hope you're feeling a bit better.

Liz
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on December 29, 2016, 02:21:43 am
Guest slashed his wrists in his room, police smashed window to get in hotel. He's going to be OK, I've got to clean it up & it looks like a set from a horror film. If anyone reading this is contemplating suicide don't go there.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 07, 2017, 03:09:18 am
The high temp. for the past couple of days has been 10F/-12C with the temp. dropping to -20F/-29C at night, I set the thermostat in my apt. to 55F/13C and it feels like a heat wave
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on January 07, 2017, 04:10:35 am
These all-nighters are making me disagreeable.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laura_Squirrel on January 07, 2017, 09:23:16 am
Realizing how crappy and inconsistent my voice is. I hate the fact that I can't do anything about it. Even after years and years of work. Being in the wrong body sucks.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on January 24, 2017, 07:55:42 pm
I find myself drifting from this place.

I think about trans issues daily. I still have things to accomplish. But my internal map is entirely feminine. Cought off guard I respond as any woman does. I no longer find it necessary to pre-censor my responses.

I find fewer and fewer topics here that spark my interest. I've seen much of it before and what I haven't seen seems to have little relevance.

I begin to see that I'm ready to leave the nest and that I feel less interested in guiding those who follow than I expected to.

This makes me sad.

I doubt that I'll disappear tomorrow, the next day, or next week. I can't reasonably predict when I'll be gone, but the day is surely coming.
Title: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on January 24, 2017, 10:34:33 pm
I find myself drifting from this place.

I think about trans issues daily. I still have things to accomplish. But my internal map is entirely feminine. Cought off guard I respond as any woman does. I no longer find it necessary to pre-censor my responses.

I find fewer and fewer topics here that spark my interest. I've seen much of it before and what I haven't seen seems to have little relevance.

I begin to see that I'm ready to leave the nest and that I feel less interested in guiding those who follow than I expected to.

This makes me sad.

I doubt that I'll disappear tomorrow, the next day, or next week. I can't reasonably predict when I'll be gone, but the day is surely coming.
Congratulations
I've noticed a decrease in time here, but still come back from time to time and post some.
So many valuable resources, but as it's a transition our needs change.
I am very happy that you're at the place you are now even though it makes you sad.
It can be a good sad
Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on January 25, 2017, 04:58:51 am
Congratulations
I've noticed a decrease in time here, but still come back from time to time and post some.
So many valuable resources, but as it's a transition our needs change.
I am very happy that you're at the place you are now even though it makes you sad.
It can be a good sad
Hugs
((nod)) :')
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Devlyn on January 25, 2017, 06:08:48 am
I find myself drifting from this place.

I think about trans issues daily. I still have things to accomplish. But my internal map is entirely feminine. Cought off guard I respond as any woman does. I no longer find it necessary to pre-censor my responses.

I find fewer and fewer topics here that spark my interest. I've seen much of it before and what I haven't seen seems to have little relevance.

I begin to see that I'm ready to leave the nest and that I feel less interested in guiding those who follow than I expected to.

This makes me sad.

I doubt that I'll disappear tomorrow, the next day, or next week. I can't reasonably predict when I'll be gone, but the day is surely coming.

Soon you'll be a Graduate!  :)

Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 25, 2017, 09:50:09 am
A boy who I remember being a few years older at school now a Grandfather killed in a hit & run in front of his wife. RIP Mike
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on January 26, 2017, 06:02:48 pm
This is why I don't ask for emotional support, everyone around me is so good at it they'd have a saint opening their own wrists within 5 minutes.  ::)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 28, 2017, 07:11:10 pm
Winter time dry cold bloody nose boogies and the bleeding cracked knuckles  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on January 28, 2017, 07:28:21 pm
Winter time dry cold bloody nose boogies and the bleeding cracked knuckles  :P
The nose I don't have a solution for but if you but a little dab of this (http://www.neutrogena.com/product/hand+cream+-+original.do?sortby=ourPicks) before going to sleep, your hands will feel far better in the morning. You can get nearly 100 applications out of one tube if you don't use and excessive amount. I have been using this product for around 40 years and it still works great.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 29, 2017, 02:16:04 am
+1 on hand cream, I put loads on & wear thin cotton moisturising gloves at night. It soaks into your skin as you sleep
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 01, 2017, 01:02:33 am
The hand cream with a pair of gloves at night did seem to help
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: MissGendered on February 01, 2017, 01:52:45 am
Lack of money for electrolysis made me unhappy today. Knowing that my parents gave me the T that caused hair to grow in the firstt place still makes me angry and very unhappy. Knowing they knew I was unhappy yet did nothing to help me undo what they did to me makes me unhappier still.

Knowing that I have to continue to struggle every day, as if life itself isn't challenge enough, to find my way out of the deepest, darkest hole any woman might imagine, because of what was inflicted on me intentionally, while life keeps going by without me participating, makes me unhappy.

But knowing I have surviived everything I have survived, well, that counts for something, even when I am struggling as I am right now. But at the moment, I am unhappy. It is late, I am alone, I have hair on my face, I feel yucky and unlovable.

Even from the grave, even today, my parents still make me unhappy. I hope they rot. Not a nice thing to say, but that is what I truly feel.

How's that for a bit of darkness, for ya?

Missy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Nora Kayte on February 01, 2017, 02:01:14 pm
I logged on today and the front page changed. Can't find anything. Usually when I click on forums I see right away transgender talk or transsexual talk and they are not there. Somebody help me
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on February 01, 2017, 02:04:24 pm
Look for the white arrows in the top right of the page & click on.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on February 03, 2017, 10:45:11 am
Looks like I have been ghosted...


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Fresas con Nata on February 03, 2017, 12:35:03 pm
I logged on today and the front page changed. Can't find anything. Usually when I click on forums I see right away transgender talk or transsexual talk and they are not there. Somebody help me

I keep a tab to https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php?action=unread open at all times. When I want to read the forum, I refresh it and open the individual pages of the listing in separate tabs each.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on February 03, 2017, 05:21:27 pm
IMDb are getting rid of their message boards...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on February 04, 2017, 02:01:25 am
3 very creepy guys in a van asking me directions for a none existing street. I made sure I stood well away from the van telling them I never heard of it.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Benvolio on February 05, 2017, 05:41:51 am
I dropped a bunch of my macaroni and cheese and Spam on the ground after heating it up. Fortunately, I'd just cleaned my floors a few hours prior, but there was still dirt in my macaroni noodles. Booh.

Also, I want a sandwich, but I'm out of bread, and I have no money for bread for a few days.

My woes seem to be all food-related... hm.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: MissGendered on February 05, 2017, 04:03:21 pm
Nothing,.

Not a darn thing is making me unhappy today, despite the things that usually do still being issues.

Maybe I should be unhappy I am not unhappy, lol..

:-) Missy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FreyasRedemption on February 12, 2017, 06:09:44 am
Pretty sure my kinda-penpal Rebecka has forgotten me entirely. Then again, it's been almost a year since I last heard of her.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: SophiaBleu on February 12, 2017, 08:39:36 am
My parents told that they will never call me anything but male name and pronouns. Upsetting at first, anger next, now heading into resignation. Maybe a little bit of time away from each other will smooth things over.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on February 12, 2017, 01:45:24 pm
I am not really unhappy. I would just like to have lovely female genitals.
My male genitals are unneeded and undesired.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on February 17, 2017, 07:30:46 pm
When you've got someone in your life who would make Eeyore look like the life of the party
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 18, 2017, 04:51:32 am
Being reminded of a time and place you would rather forget  :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on February 18, 2017, 10:22:26 am
Was kept up last night with a cough and now struggling to stay awake.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on February 18, 2017, 10:58:48 am
Divorce mediation sessions.  Worse, having to present as male (more or less) so the other party won't walk out. :P


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on February 19, 2017, 08:42:09 am
My neighbors are annoying.

One of their friends walked into my apartment last night, too drunk to count numbers on doors. 

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FreyasRedemption on February 19, 2017, 10:46:19 am
I'm feeling bored. And useless. I don't have a job or studies. And I'm feeling like either of those would make me miserable on top of merely being perpetually bored and useless. It's exactly what happened before.
And I'm not seeing a way out of this.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ghostbees on February 19, 2017, 01:13:18 pm
Roommate being rude to me..


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on February 20, 2017, 03:18:25 pm
finding my online docs appointment was BS . trying to get HRT >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: PinkThorn682 on February 26, 2017, 01:29:44 pm
Found out our dog is going to have to be euthanized tomorrow. In fairness she made it to 13 but she's got some pretty major health issues now and can't do a whole lot without assistance.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on February 26, 2017, 02:29:06 pm
Found out our dog is going to have to be euthanized tomorrow. In fairness she made it to 13 but she's got some pretty major health issues now and can't do a whole lot without assistance.
:'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: PinkThorn682 on February 26, 2017, 05:04:16 pm
And the fact that I'm not going to be around to say goodbye considering I'm in class all morning and then an hour and a half away by train.  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: gwencook on February 26, 2017, 05:20:34 pm
I got treated like complete rubbish today from my stepfather for simply talking to my friends, yet the worst part about it is that it happens on a daily basis.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on March 04, 2017, 04:05:17 pm
Having to fit a new tyre to my car cos had to drive it flat through the one way system going home last night and not being able to work out how to post photos from my lap top on here, avatar ect.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on March 04, 2017, 04:12:01 pm
For avatars, at the top of the screen Profile>Modify Profile>Forum profile and you should be able to load one from your laptop.
Pictures are a bit more complicated in that you have to put the picture on photo server like Photobucket, capture the url and insert the following into your post.
[img]http://url.jpg[/img]
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on March 04, 2017, 04:16:41 pm
Working a 7 hr shift with no break in a fast food place on a Saturday  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny07 on March 05, 2017, 04:56:26 am
Its been a while since I last posted as I have really been down.
I hate hiding who I am and have little support outside.

I feel so also sometimes its hard.
Work is a pain and been awful dealing with a bully.

Why is this so hard?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alexbn on March 05, 2017, 03:18:16 pm
A couple looking at me weird and I don't like that.I hate people that think I am not a normal person in life with me being a fulltime crossdresser.This was at the store buying a gallon of milk after getting out of church
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Modified on March 05, 2017, 04:39:40 pm
Me still having fatigue issues REALLY bad, for around a week after my T injections. Its starting to affect my work and is a horrible time to be dealing with it since im getting really busy this year...
That and im often just bummed about where i live, missing out on opportunities because were not in the city and are so far from it, and always bummed out about the house we live in, which is literally rotting out from under us but cant afford to move atm. Gotta worry daily if someone will end up reporting our landlord for the house and get it condemned and us end up homeless.  =/
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 05, 2017, 04:44:08 pm
Found a wrap of speed left in a room, forgotten how horrible the comedown is
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 05, 2017, 04:52:15 pm
Having something going on that I'd like to whine to all of you about but not feeling up for the drama the subject would generate. Meta-unhappiness!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on March 05, 2017, 06:16:56 pm
Trying to figure out this stupid name thing.

I really like Estelle but I have a lisp that I am incredibly self conscious of and having a name that points it out would probably drive me nuts. (or nuttier in any case)  And of course my parents were nice enough to give me something completely devoid of a feminine version. 

It's kind of bizarre to think about since a name was always something I took for granted.  Oh well, nobody said this would be easy.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 12, 2017, 07:47:55 am
I'm worried and nervous over the same thing I posted about on March 5. Progress is being made but I woke up tense anyway. I really, really need someone to talk to. (Sorry guys posting it here won't do this time.) Just need to get through this week, (then this month,...).
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on March 12, 2017, 07:55:38 am
Mmmm so many worries.

I was speaking and my remaining vocal cord went.

I needed to learn how to speak again anyway.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 12, 2017, 08:27:55 am
Mmmm so many worries.

I was speaking and my remaining vocal cord went.

I needed to learn how to speak again anyway.
Cindy! I'm so sorry! I was just thinking about you while talking to my sister. The conversation moved on before I could tell her what an inspiration you are, but I know!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 12, 2017, 04:41:25 pm
Mmmm so many worries.

I was speaking and my remaining vocal cord went.

I needed to learn how to speak again anyway.

This made me  :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 13, 2017, 08:57:18 am
Seeing a video of a scumbag illtreating a French Bulldog. Lucky for him he's a long way from me. Reading about Cindy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 13, 2017, 03:45:44 pm
Got pulled over for a headlight out this morning AND the cop misgendered me. Stupid thing is, he gendered me correctly before he took my ID and went back to the police car. What damaging bit of data is floating around in their systems, my middle name, perhaps?

At least he was nice. First cop I ever met who admitted to having a quota.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on March 13, 2017, 04:52:32 pm
Well the daughters Drag beetle has been picked for a prestigious VW show weekend after next then I tried to get the time of work to take it. Company policy is restricted (as in no) holidays allowed mid FEB till end of March, yes you guessed it . Well the T kicked in and I had a go at the area manager(not his fault) but at least he said he will be seeing a high up on Wednesday and will ask. Not that I am holding my breath
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 14, 2017, 11:57:32 am
Snowed in, packing up to move TOMORROW! Lots more still to do and no way for people to get here to help, if there was anyone I could even ask to help. Who schedules an eviction during a blizzard!?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 14, 2017, 12:20:00 pm
Snowed in, packing up to move TOMORROW! Lots more still to do and no way for people to get here to help, if there was anyone I could even ask to help. Who schedules an eviction during a blizzard!?

   That's really crappy Dee. No fun at all.

  Hugs,
    Jeanette
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 14, 2017, 12:36:27 pm
This, by-the-by, is the thing I haven't wanted to talk about for the past few weeks.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 14, 2017, 02:06:23 pm
This, by-the-by, is the thing I haven't wanted to talk about for the past few weeks.

  Do you need to talk about it now? Please open up a new thread so you can if you need to talk.

  Hugs,
    Jeanette
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 14, 2017, 02:14:25 pm
Thank you, but I'm in panic/packing mode. No real time to talk. Maybe by the weekend, if I don't close up like a clam by then.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 14, 2017, 04:09:09 pm
No real time to talk. Maybe by the weekend, if I don't close up like a clam by then.

  Clamming up is not allowed. Hang in there until you have more time. Then come and talk about it. PM me if you'd like.

  Hugs,
   Jeanette
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 14, 2017, 06:15:55 pm
Dirt bag put his baby on life support I dread reading my local paper People's evil knowso no limit
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 14, 2017, 09:45:49 pm
(http://8016235491c6828f9cae-6b0d87410f7cc1525cc32b79408788c4.r96.cf2.rackcdn.com/1705/19059796_1.jpg)

Great soy sauce in a cute lil' container, but tips over far too easily and I tend to like my soy sauce on my food rather than all over the floor and the inside of the refrigerator  :eusa_doh:  What a mess!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 14, 2017, 09:59:28 pm
My lack of self control in doing something I knew was likely to get me in trouble.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on March 16, 2017, 04:24:48 pm
Just look at my post in ARRRCH
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 16, 2017, 04:39:11 pm
The baby in the previous post died.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 16, 2017, 06:01:43 pm
yes
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 17, 2017, 03:21:00 pm
I am having the worst year of my life and this week has been the worst week of that horrible year. I been dealing with, over the past, well actually since a month after I started HRT in September of 2014, 18 months of unemployment followed by under employment until I started working full time with people with TBIs at the beginning of the year. Finally everything fell apart and we were notified that we were being evicted as of yesterday. We began packing up and looking for a new place and in the middle of that 3 feet (about a metre) of snow was dropped on us which slowed down the whole move. Today I find myself exhausted, with stuff still to put into storage, and homeless. I feel that I've totally let Randi down. This whole thing made me so upset and insecure that I admitted to Randi that I really did not want the divorce she asked for last May. She told me that we are not a couple, just very good friends, and she still wants it. She wants me with her, but there's no where for us to be together even that much, or even, really, anywhere for us to exist even separately.

Her attitude is entirely to do with me being trans, she's made that clear, although she's made no effort to secure that divorce she's asked for. For my part, even with that loss, I know that transition has been good for me because prior to it, for much less serious issues that these, I've seriously considered suicide. I'm not considering it now. I would consider changing locations, I'm up to here with snow (literally). I won't go because I love what I do and the loving, supportive clients and staff I work with and I don't know where I would ever find that again.

So at 57 I'm homeless, I've effectively lost the love of my life and I don't see myself replacing her. What lesbian would want an old pansexual trans dyke who will never be able to afford that final surgery? (Yes, I'm feeling sorry for myself. I know that love is still a possibility. I just don't feel that it is.)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on March 17, 2017, 04:51:42 pm
Feeling for you, hope you get some place soon. I was lucky that my mom put me up for a few weeks when the wife kicked me out for being trans and that gave me time to find a flat Now have nothing to hold me back. So maybe if you can find your own space it may help you blossom. Hugs from Davina
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LiliFee on March 20, 2017, 11:13:48 am
One of my daughters actually told me that she is a TERF and that Germaine Greer is one of her heroes. I know my daughter is a feminist, so I pointed out that Feminist theory has moved on a heck of a lot since the bra-burning, all-men-are-evil stuff of the 1970s (which was essential back then but times have changed!) and there are far better, more modern, more enlightened feminists than Greer to follow; Greer is stuck in a 1970s time warp. As a feminist my daughter should be in support of all women, shouldn't she?

Her response: "Of course I support all women. I just don't support those who are men".

Crikey moses, you'd think after four years of my transition the girl would have a bit more of a clue, wouldn't you? I chalk it up to teenage rebellion & I don't doubt she'll mature in time. But it's bloody painful at the moment. I went through labour to be subjected to this. :'(

Hey FTMDiaries... Sorry for digging up an old topic. Have you had the chance to talk to your daughter a bit more? Is it still the same, or has she moved out of this rather archaic and painful way of thinking?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on March 20, 2017, 11:57:06 am
Hey FTMDiaries... Sorry for digging up an old topic. Have you had the chance to talk to your daughter a bit more? Is it still the same, or has she moved out of this rather archaic and painful way of thinking?

Hi LiliFee - thanks for asking. No, sadly I barely speak to her at all at the moment; I haven't seen her for a couple of weeks.

She's doing Social Studies at school & last year they looked into the history of feminism. I'm guessing that because she's so annoyed at me for transitioning, she latched onto some of those old-school ideas & is using them as ammo to get back at me.

Ah well, she's a teenager. It could be a heck of a lot worse, I suppose.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LiliFee on March 20, 2017, 12:13:53 pm
Hi LiliFee - thanks for asking. No, sadly I barely speak to her at all at the moment; I haven't seen her for a couple of weeks.

She's doing Social Studies at school & last year they looked into the history of feminism. I'm guessing that because she's so annoyed at me for transitioning, she latched onto some of those old-school ideas & is using them as ammo to get back at me.

Ah well, she's a teenager. It could be a heck of a lot worse, I suppose.

Hm, I'm sorry for that :(

You seem like a nice and thoughtful person, so I haven't really got any other explanation as well :)

What I don't get about those second wave feminists and their rotten ideas: those ideas are the reverse of what they're projecting onto men. To take a bit of Germaine Greer's argumentation:

-> What's so bad about men? They use (biological) determinism to force people to think into binaries, thus creating a difference between men and women. This difference is then exploited for the sake of suppressing women.

Now let's turn things around -> What's so bad about TERFs? They use (biological) determinism to force people to think into binaries, thus creating a difference between trans- and cismen/women. This difference is then exploited for the sake of suppressing trans*people.

Let's take another page out of Greer's book: Mansplaining. Mansplaining is what happens when a man uses his infinite wisdom about women, to explain exactly how her life is going and how the world perceives her.

Turning this around as well -> Cis-Splaining. Cis-Splaining is what happens when a cis-person (sadly: mostly ciswomen) use their infinite wisdom about trans*people, to explain exactly how the trans*person's life is going and how the world perceives them (as in: projecting a shared femininity, assuming everybody's raised the same way, assuming they KNOW how trans*feminine/masculine socialization works etc)

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on March 20, 2017, 03:33:32 pm
Knowing that Cindy is in surgery...serious, serious life changing surgery.

Liz
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 20, 2017, 05:01:00 pm
Knowing that Cindy is in surgery...serious, serious life changing surgery.

Liz

True this  :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: strangemagic on March 20, 2017, 11:30:03 pm
I tried selling basically my whole closet to a consignment shop to get some much needed extra money. They only took 3 of my shirts and offered me $9  :-\
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on March 21, 2017, 01:02:50 pm
Once again, my mom is putting off taking me to school. Fun.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on March 21, 2017, 03:47:06 pm
Work, not my job just the rest of it. Said to my manager this morning that I need docs appointment but earliest time is 8.30 , well I start work at 8.30 and his reply was"cant see that happening" so when I started being cross he had a go at me . He is a total pillok (idiot ) by law he cant stop me with reasonable notice. Anyway upshot is will go Online booking at work tomorrow and see which day I can get.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on March 22, 2017, 12:27:11 pm
London.  :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on March 27, 2017, 09:54:23 am
Well, this was yesterday really, but still: yesterday was Mother's Day here in the UK. And for the first time ever, I didn't get to see my kids.

My eldest at least texted me in the morning to wish me a happy Mother's Day, but my youngest completely ignored me all day. I made efforts last week to convince(!) them to go out to lunch with me, but my eldest was working (which is understandable) and my youngest is studying for her exams. So instead I spent the day alone being totally and utterly unappreciated, and whilst I wanted to do something nice for myself (like watching a movie or going out to a restaurant for a meal) I knew I couldn't bear to do it because everywhere would be packed with families showing their love & appreciation for their mothers. And I'd be sat there all alone with nobody showing their love & appreciation for me.

I resent having to feel grateful for a bloody text from my daughter. I deserve so much better than that. And I'm disappointed in my youngest for showing me such callous disregard that she couldn't even bear for me to pop round for 10 minutes so we could see each other on this significant day. She & I used to be best buddies when she was little, but ever since I came out she's been absolutely vile towards me.

Y'know, Mother's Day became a very painful experience for me when I lost my own mother in 1995. I had my first kid just a couple of years later, and the day was made much better by being able to focus on my own kids' love for me rather than on my loss of my Mum (although of course I think of her every year). But now that my kids have pretty much ignored me, the day's gone back to being a traumatic one once again. And once again, I'm absolutely dreading it coming round next year. Sod it, I'll just have to leave the country for the week next year. :'(

TL;DR: when you're trans, families can be awful.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: SailorMars1994 on March 27, 2017, 12:00:35 pm
After lunch (Had KFC) i walked home and my dysphroia came and acted up.. then it got worse as I felt my penis rub up agasint my jeans which made me so dysphoric i vomitted :/
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 27, 2017, 02:45:17 pm
Day off cancelled again, huge workload as no one else left
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 30, 2017, 06:12:54 am
Diagnosed with PTSD again  :P  The psych prescribed an antidepressant, but I'm not sure how I feel about that

He seem to think I was joking when I told him that I wasn't real keen on doing what I consider to be doing drugs, but I turned the script into the chemist because if I don't "follow the program" I run the risk of losing what benefits I still have  :-\   

I guess being "caught between a rock and a hard place" can have both a literal and virtual meaning  :-\
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Devlyn on March 30, 2017, 06:20:52 am
Diagnosed with PTSD again  :P  The psych prescribed an antidepressant, but I'm not sure how I feel about that

He seem to think I was joking when I told him that I wasn't real keen on doing what I consider to be doing drugs, but I turned the script into the chemist because if I don't "follow the program" I run the risk of losing what benefits I still have  :-\   

I guess being "caught between a rock and a hard place" can have both a literal and virtual meaning  :-\

Big hug!  I know what you mean about the drugs. I turned down a prescription when my doctor offered it. That seemed to perplex her.

Sending positive thoughts your way.  :)

Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 30, 2017, 06:49:31 am
Big hug!  I know what you mean about the drugs. I turned down a prescription when my doctor offered it. That seemed to perplex her.

Sending positive thoughts your way.  :)

Hugs, Devlyn

Thank you

I guess it's a fear of sorts, but if I were still deployable I'd rather go on a jump into a hot zone than pop a pill every morning 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on March 30, 2017, 10:41:06 am
Diagnosed with PTSD again  :P  The psych prescribed an antidepressant, but I'm not sure how I feel about that

He seem to think I was joking when I told him that I wasn't real keen on doing what I consider to be doing drugs, but I turned the script into the chemist because if I don't "follow the program" I run the risk of losing what benefits I still have  :-\   

I guess being "caught between a rock and a hard place" can have both a literal and virtual meaning  :-\

Had the same thoughts before taking an antidepressant too. But thinking how I wouldn't not take a drug for a physical illness; taking one for a mental one isn't any different.

Sending positive thoughts too :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Rachel_Christina on March 30, 2017, 11:33:09 am
Having someone on Instagram give me the comment, "do you count your face in cm or km" this really got me down. The whole long face thing is something that gets me down, and to have that thrown my way, especially with recent happenings in my life really sucked :/
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 30, 2017, 11:33:32 am
Ant  ants discovered my cordial cherries.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on March 30, 2017, 03:41:36 pm
I don't know how to take that :o
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on March 30, 2017, 04:03:40 pm
I would take it as an act of aggression.  Cry havoc and let slip the insecticide fog of war.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 30, 2017, 04:28:04 pm
I don't like ants but I really hate wasps they're the skinhead Millwall hooligans of insects. Any insects got my cherries I'd zap them with Raid
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 31, 2017, 05:00:45 am
Diagnosed with PTSD again    The psych prescribed an antidepressant, but I'm not sure how I feel about that

He seem to think I was joking when I told him that I wasn't real keen on doing what I consider to be doing drugs, but I turned the script into the chemist because if I don't "follow the program" I run the risk of losing what benefits I still have  :-\   

I guess being "caught between a rock and a hard place" can have both a literal and virtual meaning  :-\
I'm rather surprised, although there are always extenuating circumstances. Working in psychology and being a PTSD sufferer I know that antidepressants are not the evidence based treatment for PTSD. There must be more to the story, but they may not have told it to you. Then again, they could just be a lazy psychiatrist.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 31, 2017, 06:00:39 am
I'm rather surprised, although there are always extenuating circumstances. Working in psychology and being a PTSD sufferer I know that antidepressants are not the evidence based treatment for PTSD. There must be more to the story, but they may not have told it to you. Then again, they could just be a lazy psychiatrist.

If I understand correctly his reasoning is that I also deal with acute depression and anxiety related to physical injuries incurred and a few other aspects of life
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on March 31, 2017, 08:15:59 am
My daughter is hurting a lot due to the separation and the tension between her mother and me. Yesterday it broke my heart to see her suffering!

AND

I tried for more than a year to get a amicable divorce agreement. But my wife didn't answer to my last offer for more than two months.

Today I asked my lawyer to start legal actions.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on April 04, 2017, 05:18:22 pm
I was laughed at and called the T-slur at the mall today. I can't stop blaming myself - even though I know I shouldn't -because I wore a regular t-shirt instead of a hoodie today. It's hot, but I suppose it's more important to layer my shirts and cover up what's underneath them than to be comfortable.

You can easily see the slight bulge of my chest through t-shirts, and while I'd love to have a flatter chest, I don't want to double bind. It's too risky... So I'll just wear hoodies until I'm able to get top surgery.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on April 04, 2017, 09:08:29 pm
I was laughed at and called the T-slur at the mall today. I can't stop blaming myself - even though I know I shouldn't -because I wore a regular t-shirt instead of a hoodie today. It's hot, but I suppose it's more important to layer my shirts and cover up what's underneath them than to be comfortable.

You can easily see the slight bulge of my chest through t-shirts, and while I'd love to have a flatter chest, I don't want to double bind. It's too risky... So I'll just wear hoodies until I'm able to get top surgery.
I am not sure what the acceptable styles are for you but consider a vest style jacket or a sweat shirt with cutoff arms. Both would put heaver fabric on your chest while at lest leaving your arms uncovered.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on April 05, 2017, 02:32:10 am
I was laughed at and called the T-slur at the mall today. I can't stop blaming myself - even though I know I shouldn't -because I wore a regular t-shirt instead of a hoodie today. It's hot, but I suppose it's more important to layer my shirts and cover up what's underneath them than to be comfortable.

You can easily see the slight bulge of my chest through t-shirts, and while I'd love to have a flatter chest, I don't want to double bind. It's too risky... So I'll just wear hoodies until I'm able to get top surgery.

So sorry that happened to you  >:(  :(. If it helps they may not have thought you were trans; many cis men don't have completely flat chests. Have you tried the sports bra method (wearing one the right size and one a size smaller back to front over it)? Slightly uncomfortable but safee than other methods.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on April 05, 2017, 02:24:51 pm
Dena, thank you for the suggestions! Sadly I'm very insecure about my arms (even in t-shirts), so the sleeveless hoodies aren't really something I'd like to try, and I'm not very fond of vest jackets, but thank you!

Elis, thank you for the reassurance. I'm pre-everything so it was probably obvious to them that either a) I'm trans or b) I'm just a butch lesbian that wants to look like a guy.
I wear a binder currently, I find that it works much better than the sports bra method (and it's actually safer), and when I say double bind I mean layering another binder or a sports bra over the one I'm already wearing. But thank you!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on April 06, 2017, 06:19:41 am
Oh Maksim. Have a (hug).

The man suit I inhabit, is very much not flat chested (one of many questions that my gp will be asked about), and can cause a few distractions. A nice quality dress shirt seems to work wonders at hiding shape, and the fabric tends to have a life of its own - perfect disguise, only needing hair cut to match and brows that have been left untended...

For me, as I'm non-transitioning, I've had a man cut to go with the man suit, so potential employers will actively consider me... I doubt it will stop my male fail though ;)

Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on April 06, 2017, 01:05:46 pm
Oh Maksim. Have a (hug).

The man suit I inhabit, is very much not flat chested (one of many questions that my gp will be asked about), and can cause a few distractions. A nice quality dress shirt seems to work wonders at hiding shape, and the fabric tends to have a life of its own - perfect disguise, only needing hair cut to match and brows that have been left untended...

For me, as I'm non-transitioning, I've had a man cut to go with the man suit, so potential employers will actively consider me... I doubt it will stop my male fail though ;)

Rowan
Thanks Rowan, I've been looking into button-downs and dress shirts recently as a wise man suggested would be best for non-passing FTM guys. I'm a bit on the heavier side though, so finding one that fits my arms and gut while not looking frumpy will be a challenge!
Ohhh the male fail... Also a challenge. ::)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on April 06, 2017, 03:33:27 pm
Oh, all mannoflage is drab and frumpy lol, don't  worry about that, and I'm pretty sure that you won't need to worry about the sizes (in the main they are sized on neck size so the collar fits), men generally don't wear their clothes tight, so baggy is a-ok :)

Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 09, 2017, 01:18:00 am
Selling my bike, the shiftiest looking character I seen in a long time came for a test ride with £5 deposit! (yeah right, that's happening!). I saw him with his shiftier looking friends cruising round in a big van, now he knows where I live & work & what my bike looks like. ( It's kept off the premises but near enough to walk to)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on April 09, 2017, 12:54:55 pm
 $300.00 a month rent increase.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on April 09, 2017, 01:13:24 pm
Having to go to work tomorrow. Everyday should be Saturday.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on April 09, 2017, 02:45:08 pm
The battery in my pickup died, two weeks after the warranty expired.  I swear there's a self destruct timer in those stupid things.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 10, 2017, 02:22:43 am
Day off cancelled til Wednesday 12 days without a day off.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on April 10, 2017, 04:59:24 pm
lucky you 3 bl**dy weeks if you don't count sundays (do have hol Monday ) will be owed 4 lou days by then,Its our stupid managers fault not letting anyone have a due day when someone is on holiday but that is not so at the other branch. Pigged off over not getting HRT and the cost of private and didn't like the look of internet supply. Feeling dysphoric today as well and after a good day at Shakey with my daughter and grandson even if she did pull a face when the trans subject came up .
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on April 16, 2017, 09:24:51 am
So went to get my ears pierced , SHUT wtf rang them to see if open on Easter Sunday as well!!!!!!! Next week then
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 16, 2017, 10:11:56 am
A 130 mile trip to see  a POS 1200 Sportster that was nothing like the description & worth half the price the cl0own was asking
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on April 16, 2017, 10:55:28 am
A 130 mile trip to see  a POS 1200 Sportster that was nothing like the description & worth half the price the cl0own was asking
That sucks! I'm drooling for another Harley! I hope you find what you want.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on April 16, 2017, 11:46:58 am
So went to get my ears pierced , SHUT wtf rang them to see if open on Easter Sunday as well!!!!!!! Next week then

 A right bummer Davina. Come on over I have needles and  alcohol and will fix you up free of charge.

  Hugs,
  Jeanette
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on April 16, 2017, 04:10:35 pm
This week has been the anniversary of a major trauma in my childhood. I've been very fragile, and I'm also suffering from female body issues. Ugh!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on April 16, 2017, 04:57:08 pm
A 130 mile trip to see  a POS 1200 Sportster that was nothing like the description & worth half the price the cl0own was asking


I hate when that happens.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on April 16, 2017, 04:57:37 pm
 My sister's nebulizer quit working. I can't get a new one until Tuesday and can't seem to make hers work.

  dang,
   Jeanette
 
 Change the I can't fix it to I fixed it !! and it made me and her happy. She needs to use it at least 4 times a day. New one is still ordered and will be delivered Tuesday.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 16, 2017, 05:46:13 pm
Keeping my 883R Dee, better the devil you know.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on April 16, 2017, 06:28:03 pm
I had to sell my superglide to pay bills when I shattered my shoulder. Right now I'd even take a rice burner.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on April 16, 2017, 06:31:06 pm
I had to sell my superglide to pay bills when I shattered my shoulder. Right now I'd even take a rice burner.

Hi Dee Got a very lonely Boulevard c50 that I can't ride only done 6k  ;D I miss my riding days...beautiful day here sun shining, roads will be quiet...perfect riding weather about 30c

Liz
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on April 16, 2017, 11:44:31 pm
Haven't had righteous bike for years, but if I can ever afford it

(http://dx1media.dx1app.com/products/USA/HD/2017/MC/CRUISER/STREET_500/50/VELOCITY_RED_SUNGLO/2000000003.jpg)

This is where my head is at

(https://tse2.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.R45Y_FY4hXLKovV85pyOswEsDB&pid=15.1&P=0&w=239&h=155)

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on April 17, 2017, 10:18:14 am
Had a very small family gathering at my mother's house. Don't know how long she can still live alone. Her mental state is worsening very quickly. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on April 19, 2017, 02:20:22 pm
I've been a bit under the weather over the past week or so but thought I was beginning feel a lil' better, I was wrong

So today started with a coughing fit which triggered my gag reflex and up came last night's dinner  :P  So then I could feel my nose start to run, turned out to be a gusher full of blood  :P

Thought about going back to bed but I have things I need to get done  :P

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: vanderpn on April 19, 2017, 04:01:40 pm
I was finally open to my psychiatrist about wanting to start hormones, and he flat out said don't do that because it would "mess with" my body chemistry and mental health. >:( I got a little irate and may have said a few choice words. So now I need a new psychiatrist. There are not many in my area and I can't find any info on whether anyone is trans-friendly or not. Needless to say, I am not in a very good place right now. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on April 19, 2017, 04:49:09 pm
Looking in my panties and seeing the wrong parts.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on April 23, 2017, 02:40:53 am
I lost a friend today because of the fact that I'm trans. He grew up in a very different part of the world, and I don't blame him for the way he was raised. I just wish people weren't so easy to throw others away for something they can't help.
I do feel as though I owe everyone I've met in the past few weeks an apology for deceiving them, though. It was only one guy from a rural area, but it's still hurtful and I feel very discouraged. I know I'll never be accepted in the country that my family is from. I just want to crawl under a rock.

I don't know why I'm so hurt by this. I was expecting it this whole time. That's why I never told anyone...

I know not everyone will accept me, but it hurts more than I expected it to.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on April 23, 2017, 10:29:00 am
I lost a friend today because of the fact that I'm trans. He grew up in a very different part of the world, and I don't blame him for the way he was raised. I just wish people weren't so easy to throw others away for something they can't help.
I do feel as though I owe everyone I've met in the past few weeks an apology for deceiving them, though. It was only one guy from a rural area, but it's still hurtful and I feel very discouraged. I know I'll never be accepted in the country that my family is from. I just want to crawl under a rock.

I don't know why I'm so hurt by this. I was expecting it this whole time. That's why I never told anyone...

I know not everyone will accept me, but it hurts more than I expected it to.

You haven't deceived anyone. Like with any medical condition it's not your fault you didn't discover you had it until later in life. Would you be deceiving anyone if you had just discovered you were diabetic or needed to wear glasses? Of course not. You deserve a better friend than the one you lost.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on April 23, 2017, 10:56:34 am
Haven't had righteous bike for years, but if I can ever afford it

(http://dx1media.dx1app.com/products/USA/HD/2017/MC/CRUISER/STREET_500/50/VELOCITY_RED_SUNGLO/2000000003.jpg)

This is where my head is at

(https://tse2.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.R45Y_FY4hXLKovV85pyOswEsDB&pid=15.1&P=0&w=239&h=155)
Here's mine:

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20170423/45aba891b2b5c7a388e1c0b4c0026636.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on April 23, 2017, 12:01:35 pm
You haven't deceived anyone. Like with any medical condition it's not your fault you didn't discover you had it until later in life. Would you be deceiving anyone if you had just discovered you were diabetic or needed to wear glasses? Of course not. You deserve a better friend than the one you lost.
Thanks Elis, I appreciate it. He's only known me as male, so finding out that I'm not biologically male really confused and angered him. It was sad, but you're right, he wasn't a true friend if he was willing to throw me away because of that.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Axolotl on April 23, 2017, 12:19:18 pm
I saw my birth certificate today and it made me extremely upset.  I feel like it's more of a death certificate and I haven't been born yet.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on April 26, 2017, 01:17:23 am
I finally filed for divorce a few weeks ago to get things speed up. Wife didn't act on settlement proposal, so we hoped that it will trigger a reaction. No reaction but got the date for the first hearing middle of June. So I will postpone my name change again! I hate myself for overthrowing my principles for her in the past and now I have the whole mess.
Title: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on April 27, 2017, 04:11:20 am
My birthday was the 8th. Woke up on the 9th by landlord and told to leave. I declined and when the police arrived they agreed. However, I still have to move. Tired of all of my paycheck (most  of it) going to my ex for child support. I have asked if she would alter the amount as it's still based on a decent job and I now make minimum wage. She blocks my emails and calls and has become invisible on fb so the only way to communicate is through my 12 year old daughter.
Tried to get legal help in my state but because the kids never lived here I got no help there.
Do I have basically been in a state of panic all month.
I found a place I can afford but it's in the war zone and the place is littered with hypodermic needles from drugs. They have already tried to scam me on money but right now it's my only option.
Suicide has been on my mind so much lately but I push on for one more day.
I really am trying to believe things will get better, but it's hard. So freaking hard
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 27, 2017, 05:07:16 pm
Sciatica, hello codeine habit we meet again
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on April 30, 2017, 04:44:42 am
I'm noticing a change in my sleeping and hygiene habits that indicates an oncoming episode of depression. Because of this, my parents will likely assume the depression is starting because I've started HRT and they'll push to take me off of it. Just like they did with vitamin B12 because I happened to get depressed around the time I started taking that (a harmless SUPPLEMENT).

Regardless, I'm awake at 5:45 in the morning due to crippling dysphoria that's consuming every part of my thought process right now. I have to be awake very soon, but I don't see any sign of myself getting any rest tonight.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on April 30, 2017, 05:42:16 am
I'm noticing a change in my sleeping and hygiene habits that indicates an oncoming episode of depression. Because of this, my parents will likely assume the depression is starting because I've started HRT and they'll push to take me off of it. Just like they did with vitamin B12 because I happened to get depressed around the time I started taking that (a harmless SUPPLEMENT).

Regardless, I'm awake at 5:45 in the morning due to crippling dysphoria that's consuming every part of my thought process right now. I have to be awake very soon, but I don't see any sign of myself getting any rest tonight.

Sorry to hear that. Unfortunately T will make you more tired and lethargic in the beginning but on the plus side you can tell your parents your tired bcos of the T instead of bcos of your depression.

It takes a while for your brain to become used to the influx of T but it is temporarily and the dysphoria will gradually become a lot more manageable.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Axolotl on April 30, 2017, 06:33:53 am
(Yesterday) Realizing that there are nearly no vegan shoes that I can buy in-person.  I don't consider pleather vegan, because no one can tell it's not leather.  Fake dead cow is still offensive to me.  I also have a foot injury which is preventiing me from wearing flip flops (one of my favorite footwear).  It's all just very annoying to the extent that I want to make my own shoes, but I won't be able to even try them on until I heal.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on April 30, 2017, 01:08:49 pm
Sorry to hear that. Unfortunately T will make you more tired and lethargic in the beginning but on the plus side you can tell your parents your tired bcos of the T instead of bcos of your depression.

It takes a while for your brain to become used to the influx of T but it is temporarily and the dysphoria will gradually become a lot more manageable.
Thanks for the reply. I wasn't aware that T causes lethargy and tiredness at first, so that would actually explain a lot. I just pray that this is the only problem and not actually becoming depressed again! Either way, I'm glad to hear it'll become easier as far as dysphoria goes.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: vanderpn on May 01, 2017, 08:05:51 pm
My fellow forum-goers, please keep me in your thoughts/prayers/whatevers. My parents just had a very big fight. I don't want to go into details, but I am just really upset right now. It would be bad enough as it were, but my anxiety and depression were also very bad right now to begin with. I am just not in a very good place. I promise I will reach out for help if I need it, even though it will be hard since I really don't have anyone besides my parents. So please just keep me in your minds. Thank you.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on May 01, 2017, 09:42:51 pm
I just received a txt from my Electrologist to cancel my 1pm appointment as her small dog is sick?? She cancelled not long ago citing being unwell.

It is an absolute nightmare to try and co-ordinate facial injections and when I have to cancel one it is heartbreaking especially what I have been through to grow this beard out for 6 days.

I am at the stage where there is not enough hard core first growth hair to make for an hours work and if I don't grow out 6 days she can't get to the secondary growth hairs because they are not long enough..it plays havoc with my dysphoria and I have just had a one month break from Electrolysis due to scheduling issues between her and my Dr...I really want to get this done...I have managed to organise another injection for 1:45 tomorrow (which makes day 7 with out any beard removal thankfully it is very light if not long)

If I can get the Electrologist to move her appointment slightly I can get another injecting appointment tomorrow...I am doubtful about that though...I am so frustrated...

I was just thinking about ramping up my Electrolysis with an extra session each week with out injections just using lignocaine cream....I am just so sick of this hassle....At worst I am going to accept her appointment for tomorrow and go along with the cream on and see how much I can tolerate...7 days I have been growing this out and if I don't do something tomorrow I have been through all the stress and heartache for nothing ARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on May 02, 2017, 12:38:05 am
.At worst I am going to accept her appointment for tomorrow and go along with the cream on and see how much I can tolerate...7 days I have been growing this out and if I don't do something tomorrow I have been through all the stress and heartache for nothing ARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH

   Now now Liz,   This too shall pass.

  I have hugs for you to make it all better.  HEY! I have an idea... why not got get a makeover?
  Wouldn't that be fun?

  Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Geeker on May 02, 2017, 12:10:45 pm
Knowing I can never be the me I am supposed to be without losing those I care about, that's what made me unhappy not just today but most days. :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on May 02, 2017, 12:29:14 pm
Trying to locate and old friend and I can't remember their physical address fully, and I'm not paying some company who sells electoral data just to get it. I guess I could send a few postcards to the numbers I remember. This would be a lot easier if she used social media. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on May 02, 2017, 06:01:05 pm
I had to open up about my phobia today, and I'm going to have to talk about it tomorrow with my therapist, too. I don't like talking about it.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on May 02, 2017, 10:02:13 pm
Periodic colonoscopy.  With nuisance complications.

Three days of prep, nothing but clear liquids since Sunday, a gallon of slime over 12 hours, and "Nope, not clean enough."  I got a standby slot late in the day, bought another gallon of slime powder, mixed it in a drinking fountain, chugged it from a bummed Starbucks cup, and camped in a public restroom.

So, 2 gallons of slime in 24 hours, and I was deemed marginal but they'd try.

Nothing found.  Come back in 5 years.   :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on May 03, 2017, 01:25:59 am
Periodic colonoscopy.  With nuisance complications.

Three days of prep, nothing but clear liquids since Sunday, a gallon of slime over 12 hours, and "Nope, not clean enough."  I got a standby slot late in the day, bought another gallon of slime powder, mixed it in a drinking fountain, chugged it from a bummed Starbucks cup, and camped in a public restroom.

So, 2 gallons of slime in 24 hours, and I was deemed marginal but they'd try.

Nothing found.  Come back in 5 years.   :P

 What a pain in the tush prep, but the result are good. So everything came out well in the end.

  Good job Michelle!

 Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on May 03, 2017, 09:04:12 am
Periodic colonoscopy.  With nuisance complications.

Three days of prep, nothing but clear liquids since Sunday, a gallon of slime over 12 hours, and "Nope, not clean enough."  I got a standby slot late in the day, bought another gallon of slime powder, mixed it in a drinking fountain, chugged it from a bummed Starbucks cup, and camped in a public restroom.

So, 2 gallons of slime in 24 hours, and I was deemed marginal but they'd try.

Nothing found.  Come back in 5 years.   :P

I did the gallon and then citrate of magnesia and it was good enough. I was surprised that I had more to clean out after the gallon. Well, I had three polyps, so back in three years.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ainsley on May 03, 2017, 09:23:18 am
I start my prep at noon today for my colonoscopy tomorrow morning.  :sadness:
As a stage IV colon cancer survivor I hope to be posting in the "what made you happy today" thread tomorrow...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on May 03, 2017, 10:01:22 am
I did the gallon and then citrate of magnesia and it was good enough. I was surprised that I had more to clean out after the gallon. Well, I had three polyps, so back in three years.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 Okay okay. Since we are on this subject. I'll ask my doctor about the 3 year note in my records since 3 years has gone by and if it should be scheduled. Polyps were found in mine also. ( Hate having to go to such lengths to be clean )

  Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on May 03, 2017, 06:22:35 pm
Wrong Section...thanks Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: JeanetteLW on May 03, 2017, 11:14:21 pm
My wife of 33 years used "She" pronouns when talking about me to my daughter today for the first time ever within my earshot...my stupid head wants to say it was accidental, but I don't care I'll still take it as a positive sign and a first...I didn't say anything but kissed her on the forehead and left her to her conversation  ;D ;D

  I think you are confused Liz.  This is the "unhappy" thread not the silently ecstatic thread.

  Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on May 04, 2017, 11:23:26 am
Still more divorce paperwork.  Just when we think everything was done, all the forms handed in, ready to go... 

Something is lost, missing.   Hilarity ensues.  Of the panic variety.

At least, now, hours later, the missing document has turned up.  Thank goodness.

What an un-fun day, though.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on May 23, 2017, 03:18:40 pm
We have a provincial election coming up in a week.  Since we've only been here two years, we are not automatically on the voters' list, so we need to get registered.  But just to complicate things, I am full-time Kathy, but still waiting for my legal name change documents, so all my ID is still in my dead name.  You need two pieces of ID to register.

So, the hell with it, I'll vote as <dead name> this one last time.  But, since I effectively have two strikes against me (not registered, ID that doesn't match my presentation), I figured I'd better vote ahead of time at the Returning Office.

We got all the paperwork sorted out, including an "F" on my registration (Yay!).  But between my presentation and registration that said F and my name and ID that said M, they couldn't figure out how to gender me.  One person consistently referred to me as "her", the other as "him".  *Sigh*

Oh, well, it's done, and I got to vote.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on May 23, 2017, 04:54:33 pm
My mom seems to be regressing with her acceptance of my Tourette's.
I developed a new tic recently and she hates it so much that she said: "If you don't keep your mouth covered, I'm keeping you at home for the rest of the time you're doing this."
I argued that I can't help it and that I want to be able to enjoy life rather than stressing out about how other people look at me, she said "I know you can't help it but we have to find a happy spot in the middle where you control it enough to be acceptable."
Little does she know that the stress she's been putting on me by screaming at me whenever I can't cover my mouth in time (even in the effing car, with no one around to hear us) just makes my tics a million times worse.
I thought we were past this point. No matter how many times I tell her what EVERY SINGLE ONE of my doctors has said regarding it (just let it be), she insists that I call them for a second opinion. Every freaking time.

I'm so frustrated and I just want to cry. I thought we were past this, but I guess we're not.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: HappyMoni on May 23, 2017, 05:15:46 pm
My mom seems to be regressing with her acceptance of my Tourette's.
I developed a new tic recently and she hates it so much that she said: "If you don't keep your mouth covered, I'm keeping you at home for the rest of the time you're doing this."
I argued that I can't help it and that I want to be able to enjoy life rather than stressing out about how other people look at me, she said "I know you can't help it but we have to find a happy spot in the middle where you control it enough to be acceptable."
Little does she know that the stress she's been putting on me by screaming at me whenever I can't cover my mouth in time (even in the effing car, with no one around to hear us) just makes my tics a million times worse.
I thought we were past this point. No matter how many times I tell her what EVERY SINGLE ONE of my doctors has said regarding it (just let it be), she insists that I call them for a second opinion. Every freaking time.

I'm so frustrated and I just want to cry. I thought we were past this, but I guess we're not.

I am so sorry to hear this. It is so easy for people to judge us when they don't experience it and have no idea what they are talking about. What part of beyond our control do they not understand. Hang in there my friend.
Moni
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on May 23, 2017, 11:28:50 pm
I was over in San Francisco, finished with shopping and whatnot and ready to go catch a train home, and I stopped to get an espresso macchiato.  I was sitting in a corner there enjoying my drink when one of the local homeless people sat down next to me.  That isn't what bothered me.  There are unfortunately a lot of homeless folks in the region, with its insane rise in housing costs and unbalanced job market.

The guy just looks at me, then says, "Hey.  You a tranny?"  Ow, on so many levels, and now I realize that I'm nearly boxed in.  Bad seating choice!  Deflect and evade time.  "Désolé, je ne parle pas anglais." Stand and push the table aside, and leave.

Sorry, fella, but that is just a conversation we are not going to have.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on May 24, 2017, 12:10:49 am
I am so sorry to hear this. It is so easy for people to judge us when they don't experience it and have no idea what they are talking about. What part of beyond our control do they not understand. Hang in there my friend.
Moni
Thanks Moni, hopefully things will get better sometime soon.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on May 24, 2017, 09:09:15 am
Ouch, Michelle!   >:(  Not a nice thing to have happen.  You handled it well.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on May 24, 2017, 09:18:16 am

 French huh? Good choice not likely a language he would be fluent in. lol  Well done Michelle. Did you by chance step on his toes as you made your exit? No?  Oh well next time. Accidentally of course.

 Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on May 24, 2017, 08:35:53 pm
The official word from Motor Vehicles: "Nova Scotia may not change the gender on your driver’s licence without an amended birth certificate."  So, I'll have to be a Kathleen with an M on my driver's license for a couple of years.  Poop!  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on May 25, 2017, 06:28:13 am
Yesterday would have been my 36th wedding anniversary. I realized the date in front of a client and broke down crying. Today is the first anniversary of her asking for a divorce. Nothing's been done about it yet and we're still living together.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on May 25, 2017, 06:51:32 am
Yesterday would have been my 36th wedding anniversary. I realized the date in front of a client and broke down crying. Today is the first anniversary of her asking for a divorce. Nothing's been done about it yet and we're still living together.

I'm so sorry. We recently should have had our 20th were it not for the fact that he decided to reject me when I came out in 2012. We lived together until this year - 3 weeks before our anniversary - when he moved out and took both of our kids and our dog with him. Some people seriously don't deserve us. Life can be so cruel. But four months down the line I'm so much happier now that his toxic presence is no longer a part of my day-to-day life. I'm slowly healing and looking forward to better things. I hope you can get there too.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on May 28, 2017, 09:14:13 pm
I saw some folks hangin' out so decided to just say hello - Big mistake - One of my jerk neighbors started talking about war stuff  :P  I just said that war is not fun and that I'd rather not talk about it then walked away
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on May 29, 2017, 10:52:56 am
I seem to have hit a plateau in the boob department.  Okay, it's only been four months; it's a marathon, not a sprint; etc., etc..  But still, they were doing so well for a while there.   :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on May 29, 2017, 12:45:43 pm
I seem to have hit a plateau in the boob department.  Okay, it's only been four months; it's a marathon, not a sprint; etc., etc..  But still, they were doing so well for a while there.   :(

 Patience Grasshopper. Still going...

 Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on May 31, 2017, 08:28:27 am
My poor little Hyundai got totaled by the insurance company.  I liked that little car.

Since the deer died as well I guess we can call this one a draw.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on May 31, 2017, 11:48:34 am
The company rebuilding the west side of my condo exterior got to my unit today.  The sliding doors to the balcony, and the balcony deck are gone.  I've got four workmen hammering and grinding away 10 feet from me in my luxe open-air apartment.

So much for my day off. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Rachel_Christina on May 31, 2017, 11:56:44 am
My poor little Hyundai got totaled by the insurance company.  I liked that little car.

Since the deer died as well I guess we can call this one a draw.

Loosing a car is always sad. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on June 02, 2017, 04:18:45 pm
My school is closing.

The school that offered me a second chance to graduate is freaking closing and i won't be able to graduate. I've basically done years of schoolwork for this program, only to be told that now I have no chance to graduate.

I've never wanted to die more in my life than I do right now. I'm never going to succeed. I will be a failure forever.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Devlyn on June 02, 2017, 04:37:20 pm
Big hug! That's absolutely not true. I know you're disappointed, but you've been given a chance to do something else now. You'll have to regroup but I know you can.

Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on June 02, 2017, 05:03:00 pm
Big hug! That's absolutely not true. I know you're disappointed, but you've been given a chance to do something else now. You'll have to regroup but I know you can.

Hugs, Devlyn
Thanks Devlyn, I'm just struggling to see that. The job market is quickly closing off to people who don't have diplomas, much less people who have Tourette's and are trans as well. I can't get a job, my own dad won't even hire me because of my Tourette's.
And if I somehow miraculously find a place that hires trans people who have such a disruptive illness, they likely won't hire me simply because I don't have a high school diploma (I've tried at Target, probably the best place to work for someone like me).
I can get my GED of course, but I don't know how that works at all and I'd absolutely view myself as an utter failure if I were to flunk that test. I'm not smart and I have terrible memory.
I don't see any new opportunities opening up from this. I just see many doors I want to go through shutting off to me for good.

Maybe something will work out far in the future. It'll be extremely difficult to find anyone who will accept someone like me as an employee, or even as a student.
Oh well, I'll figure something out eventually. Hopefully.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Riv3n on June 02, 2017, 05:38:16 pm
No one seems to welcome my presence in two Discord servers, so I've decided to hide them. Granted, I have been complaining on them A LOT.

Also, reading on another forum about how someone died 6 years ago from cancer, and how my cousin has cancer.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 02, 2017, 08:41:21 pm
Really rough memorial weekend  :P

As if it's not enough to have the faces of dead friends plaguing my mind but then my sister rang up saying she wanted to go to lunch and had a refrigerator magnet with my nephew's picture on it to give me but she never showed up  :-\   Then I made the mistake of calling my mom only to catch another ration of hell

And they wonder why I don't care to talk to them much  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Greyscale on June 03, 2017, 12:11:15 pm
I'm in a great depression for several months... Nothing makes me really happy, I wake up every day with a thought how much I want to die and I go to sleep with the same thoughts. Anyway I continue to live because I have no choice, besides a suicide will cause such a great pain to all my dear people so... I can't.
I'm continuing to struggle but all my days are the same and I see no happiness in my life at all. Now sadly it's my typical day...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 03, 2017, 04:59:52 pm
I'm in a great depression for several months... Nothing makes me really happy, I wake up every day with a thought how much I want to die and I go to sleep with the same thoughts. Anyway I continue to live because I have no choice, besides a suicide will cause such a great pain to all my dear people so... I can't.
I'm continuing to struggle but all my days are the same and I see no happiness in my life at all. Now sadly it's my typical day...

I am so sorry to hear that you are experiencing such feelings, but you are not alone, suicidal ideation is very real and a daily wrestling match for many of us including myself

Please do me a favor and promise to never give in and never give up, stay warm dear friend

Hugs

V M
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 04, 2017, 05:28:35 pm
I looked up the local pride celebration and realized it was today and it was already an hour into it. Between the rain and the ride to get to where it is and the lack of anyone to go with I just didn't want to bother. Now I feel guilty. Every other event around here costs money that I just don't have.

Happy Pride Anyway!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on June 05, 2017, 06:23:02 am
I called my Telco to change my name on my internet account, started with a chat person who told me I was required to take 3 forms of ID at least two of which had to be photo's id's...I thought this has to be a typo as we were talking via a chat to I queried and was told not it was definitely two...so I asked for a list of acceptable and they came back with a driver licence and a Passport I sad nope I only have the drivers licence so now what...In the end the telco called me and put me through to someone in a call centre to deal with it because I kept asking hard questions.....there is a whole lot more to it but suffice to say that it was all very civilised with the young lady I spoke to until after the 5th time of asking her to not call me by my old name as I had already explained I was trans and what my new legal name was...she said to me and I quote (I wrote it down)

"No... I am going to call you BXXXXX because that is the name I have on the account and it too hard otherwise"

My name is now changed with that particular Telco and I suspect that young lady had a really bad day.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ainsley on June 05, 2017, 09:45:01 am


"No... I am going to call you BXXXXX because that is the name I have on the account and it too hard otherwise"

My name is now changed with that particular Telco and I suspect that young lady had a really bad day.

That sucks!  What happened to common sense and common decency?  Why can't we treat other human beings with respect from the onset of an encounter?  ugh.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on June 05, 2017, 03:46:42 pm

"No... I am going to call you BXXXXX because that is the name I have on the account and it too hard otherwise"

My name is now changed with that particular Telco and I suspect that young lady had a really bad day.

 Hi Liz,

 Congrats on another successful name change. You list get shorter.

  You wouldn't have had anything to do with this suspected "really bad day" the young lady may have had, would you?

 Hugs
    Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on June 05, 2017, 04:47:43 pm


  You wouldn't have had anything to do with this suspected "really bad day" the young lady may have had, would you?


At one point I said " They will ask you if I said to you that your were being discriminatory. So you do understand they will want to ask you some very close questions about what you said . They normally do in these kinds of cases" She Said "What do you mean"

"I said when the solicitor cross examines you"

"Sorry SIR I don't understand"

"When we are in court and they are cross examining you as to what you said and did so as to establish your liability in the discrimination case. I can't imagine that calling me Sir after I have asked you 6 times now not to do that and of course your subsequent actions,  and if you call me Sir again I will ensure your name in number one on that litigation list"

I told her up front I was trans and what I needed to do and right up until she told me it was too hard to use my name I was prepared to actually make a compromise just to get the account name changed, once this was said I stuck to my guns. She knew she was in all sorts of trouble when she refused to put me through to a supervisor. and I asked her repeatedly very politely if she was refusing to put me through to a supervisor. Side track, change of subject etc etc

It was all sorts of things like telling me two forms of photo ID (as Liz) were required to be presented along with "supporting evidence" I informed her that this is not a legal requirement but maybe a Telco one...Nope she told me it was South Australian Law...nope you are wrong and if you insist you are being discriminatory because I could ring your company today and order thousands of dollars of products and still not have supply any more than a photo copy of a licence and probably not even that because you have identified me.

So will check my account today some time and see if the changes have been made.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Lynne on June 06, 2017, 04:11:12 pm
I applied for a training course at our company and as part of this course they are making video recordings of the sessions and we also have to do some of our own recordings at home.
At first I thought that even though I'm not a fan of recording myself when presenting as male, I'll be able to analyze the recordings of myself with our teacher in order to improve my presentation skills.

But then the time came to create my first recordings today and I just couldn't do it. I was there alone for hours in the office after work.
It just feels wrong on so many levels that just thinking about it makes me cry.

How could I project the image of a confident man, who knows what he is talking about when I'm not a man, I don't really look like a man and I hate my voice and I feel like a pretender. And I am a pretender, I pretend to be a guy until I'm ready for full-time as a woman. If I really wanted to, I could probably do this, but it feels like that would destroy a part of my soul.

Tomorrow morning is the deadline and I'm thinking of bailing out from the whole course because right now I cannot imagine that I won't cry at the moment we start to analyze one of my recordings, but that would look quite strange as an explanation in an official email to my colleagues.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on June 06, 2017, 05:04:27 pm
My daughter told me before bedtime that her mother somehow forces her to misgender me. When she tells her something about life with me using female pronouns, my ex plays dumb until my daughter uses male pronouns.

This really sucks and shows what an ignorant and transphobic person she really is, in total contrast to the open-minded image she tries to project to the outside world.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on June 08, 2017, 01:59:39 pm
I realized that the reason I've been so sensitive and mood swingy and dysphoric lately is because THAT time is starting again. I know it takes a few months on T to cease, but it seems like it's even worse for me mentally now that I'm on T. It feels like it's not supposed to happen at all now, and that makes it so much worse.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 08, 2017, 02:38:43 pm
Tapatalk has started showing me adds again.

On the plus side, this the only thing bothering me ATM.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ghostbees on June 08, 2017, 04:19:12 pm
I keep getting nightmares every time I sleep.. my mental health has been sliding downwards


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on June 08, 2017, 05:29:01 pm
I keep getting nightmares every time I sleep.. my mental health has been sliding downwards


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I feel for you I suffer vivid nightmares that will throw me out of bed(although it has been awhile since that happened) I have a program for  my Phone called Dream Pro which records only when triggered by a sound and what I have managed to do is to work out that these nightmares all follow a same basic pattern and I am always trying to escape something....not exactly sure if that helps but at least I knew how noisy I was and what I was yelling about. LOL
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ghostbees on June 08, 2017, 05:33:41 pm
I feel for you I suffer vivid nightmares that will throw me out of bed(although it has been awhile since that happened) I have a program for  my Phone called Dream Pro which records only when triggered by a sound and what I have managed to do is to work out that these nightmares all follow a same basic pattern and I am always trying to escape something....not exactly sure if that helps but at least I knew how noisy I was and what I was yelling about. LOL
What phone do you have? I might try that dreams app to see how much I have.

The vivid ones are the worst ones especially if you get attacked in said dream. Worst one was when I got stabbed.. I woke up and felt the phantom pain

I hate waking up in a cold sweat. Do you have any tips for how to cope afterwards?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on June 08, 2017, 05:44:32 pm
What phone do you have? I might try that dreams app to see how much I have.

The vivid ones are the worst ones especially if you get attacked in said dream. Worst one was when I got stabbed.. I woke up and felt the phantom pain

I hate waking up in a cold sweat. Do you have any tips for how to cope afterwards?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

IPhone 6 I have but there are android version or similar as well

Mine are always about being stopped from something or being confined or held against my will. In the earlier days before I began my transition they were usually quite violent involving me being held while horrible violent acts are being done to those I love...Some of those took me a day or so to get over. Recording them and listening to them seemed to have taken some of their power. Since I started my Transition the are far lees frequent...instead of every night or second night I have had 5 since the 16th May. I think that is pretty good I hope it helps
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 08, 2017, 05:52:01 pm
I have some pretty gnarly nightmares and wake up with the cold sweats, I've found that turning on a television is often the best sleep aid I have

I'm not sure, but I think it redirects my mind to a better place, I usually will watch comical late night talk shows, war movies are definitely out
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 09, 2017, 04:37:02 am
One of my fine neighbors pointed out that I have "Green Toe"

Green nail "Toe" syndrome is caused by bacteria called Pseudomonas aeruginosa. This bacterium flourishes in wet environments, such as canals and so forth

The fact that he pointed it out didn't bother me so much but he tried to make it sound like some sort of contagious disease

So it was the first day in several months that I was able to wear shorts and here's this bad word embarrassing me in public  :-\
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FreyasRedemption on June 09, 2017, 03:28:21 pm
My computer seems to be dying. It makes a lot more noise than it used to as its insides do stuff, and it also heats up a lot more than before, mostly for no particular reason. Why can't they just make machines that last? And before you offer up your explanation regarding capitalism and supply and demand and whatnot....making people buy new devices every five or so years because they're made not to last is not sustainable, and thus wrong. The general shape of the world's environment and sustained availability of resources should always go before short-term financial gain. The fact that people just can't get that through their thick heads bothers me even more than my computer's slow descent to nonfunctionality.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 09, 2017, 06:08:25 pm
My computer seems to be dying. It makes a lot more noise than it used to as its insides do stuff, and it also heats up a lot more than before, mostly for no particular reason. Why can't they just make machines that last? And before you offer up your explanation regarding capitalism and supply and demand and whatnot....making people buy new devices every five or so years because they're made not to last is not sustainable, and thus wrong. The general shape of the world's environment and sustained availability of resources should always go before short-term financial gain. The fact that people just can't get that through their thick heads bothers me even more than my computer's slow descent to nonfunctionality.
That sounds like the bearings in a fan going. It might be replaceable if you can isolate it.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on June 09, 2017, 06:28:54 pm
My computer seems to be dying. It makes a lot more noise than it used to as its insides do stuff, and it also heats up a lot more than before, mostly for no particular reason. Why can't they just make machines that last? And before you offer up your explanation regarding capitalism and supply and demand and whatnot....making people buy new devices every five or so years because they're made not to last is not sustainable, and thus wrong. The general shape of the world's environment and sustained availability of resources should always go before short-term financial gain. The fact that people just can't get that through their thick heads bothers me even more than my computer's slow descent to nonfunctionality.
If it's desktop, crack the case open and blow the dust bunnies out. I run my systems hard and I have to do it at least once a year. I have had dust bunnies get in the power supply fan causing a whine that drove me up the wall until I figured out where they hid the power supply. My G5 ran almost 10 years before the software became so old it no longer supported the new security protocols however it's still in place and runs fine for porting stuff to the new system.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on June 09, 2017, 07:20:33 pm
My computer seems to be dying. It makes a lot more noise than it used to as its insides do stuff, and it also heats up a lot more than before, mostly for no particular reason. Why can't they just make machines that last? And before you offer up your explanation regarding capitalism and supply and demand and whatnot....making people buy new devices every five or so years because they're made not to last is not sustainable, and thus wrong. The general shape of the world's environment and sustained availability of resources should always go before short-term financial gain. The fact that people just can't get that through their thick heads bothers me even more than my computer's slow descent to nonfunctionality.

 It never ceases to amaze me how many new computers are purchased because the owner doesn't  take care of simple maintenance or have someone with a little technical ability take a look at it.. The noise is likely as someone has already suggested just a fan needing to be replaced because of worn bearings. The running hot is also like as previously just  due to you never cleaning dust out of the computer.. Computers have airways that get clogged  so air does not flow well, your processor has a fan and a heat sink that gets clogged with dust that can overheat the cpu and shut off the computer. Replacing a fan is simple and cleaning a computer with a can of compressed air is even simpler.
  Another common reason for replacing a computer is that it is running slow. Why? The user have let all kind of unwanted garbage invade the computer software by their unsafe browsing habits. The quick remedy is the restore the computer to the way it was when it was bought. Thia is usually a simple process also.
  In the first problem it is normal wear and tear from usage. In the last two the owner is at fault. No need to bring planned obsolescence or marketing into the discussion. Computer will run forever if taken care of properly.

 Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FreyasRedemption on June 10, 2017, 06:38:18 am
Thank you. I'm getting onto doing the easy part with clearing the dust out right now, and if that doesn't help with matters, I'll seek out somebody with technical know-how to get the fan replaced.

Also, Laurie, the main reason I'm here complaining about that in the first place is because this whole thing REMINDED me of the unsustainable resource consumption perpetrated by capitalist society. If my post implied it was the sole fault of said economic problems, then I clearly was expressing my thoughts the wrong way. As it often happens when I write these things in the spur of the moment and don't feel like rewriting and thinking every word through for an hour (which is how I usually treat everything I'm about to post). And bringing my distaste for all that up was the original intent of my post, instead of asking for technical advice (which, admittedly, I sorely needed). I didn't expect to get any of that (in fact, I wasn't even expecting a response let alone three of them), since I was merely venting.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on June 10, 2017, 09:24:35 am
My boss called me aside the other day:  I had been showing pictures of my trip to Colorado to co-workers, and staff that I had previously told about my transition.  One of them complained to her about seeing the picture of me in a skirt and makeup.  She told me that she had to at least ask that I not display my transition so readily, but that she was personally fine with it, but some of the staff aren't as comfortable with it.  She told me to just be careful who I show the pictures to.  I was disappointed that one my co-workers was not as open to it as they seemed when I came out to them.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on June 12, 2017, 08:23:09 am
Yesterday I hurt my back (again), it was better in the morning but it's killing me right now.

We want to go camping at the ocean from Wednesday till Sunday, but I don't know if I can do that.

My daughter and I are looking forward to this short vacation since a while and I'm sad that I might ruin it.

Don't know if I can drive seven hours, erect the tent, sleep on the camping mattress....

Damn it

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on June 12, 2017, 08:43:05 am
I had to get blood drawn today for my six-month checkup.  It was the first time presenting as Kathy at the lab, and my identification is still in my old name.  So I had to put up with being dead-named at every step.  I went along with it ("Yes, officially, that's my name.") in order to get the paperwork done and get my results sent off to the doctor, but it was really irksome.

The sooner that name change certificate gets here, the better.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on June 12, 2017, 01:21:13 pm
I reread a thread on that I responded to a couple days ago.
I honestly couldn't believe the level of misunderstanding and the willingness to bash others for things beyond their control. Isn't that what we deal with a lot of the time? I hate that tolerance and understanding suddenly means nothing when it's "inconvenient."
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on June 12, 2017, 02:49:56 pm
In addition to my previous grievance as well as my mood swings from shark week, I found out that there were serious protests in St. Petersburg. I'm glad people are taking a stand against the government's corruption, but it's not safe. People are getting arrested and beaten by police, things got violent.
In Moscow it was a bit surreal because the protests took place amongst a historical fair so there were costumed people from different ages in Russian history hanging out around there, some were active in the protests and others just wanted to go about their business.
Luckily my friends in St. Petersburg are all okay, a couple of them attended the protests but nothing bad happened to them personally, thank god.
It just sucks that these protests have to happen at all, and the Russian people have to face consequences for standing up for what they believe in.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 14, 2017, 04:12:32 am
I love clam chowder and like to add a bit of bacon, unfortunately I seem to somehow nearly always frag the bacon   :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on June 14, 2017, 08:56:07 am
Went to a trans group meeting last night and got on really well with one of the people there. I should have said to them you can add me on fb if you like. But I kept thinking how I find it really hard to read people and am never sure if someone is actually interested in me or just faking it. Oh well; here's hoping they go to the next meeting in 2 weeks.

And I missed college today. I just feel really tired lately and simply didn't feel up to it. So now I feel like an a - hole for not going as the teacher is really nice and supportive.

Also went to the GP today to get a referral to see a specialist to diagnose possible autism. The GP said he'd write a letter to the nearest place after I suggested it but I hate how he said autistic people tend to not be very self aware; which is a huge generalisation. I'm sure there are many autistic people who aren't completely stuck in their own world's and are fully aware how their brains acts differently from other people's. Also received a letter from the gender clinic at the doctor's saying my blood test results need to be redone as my T levels are too high. I hate getting my blood tested and I only did the test 2 months ago  >:(. Also the GP asked me which way am I transitioning (er why would I be on testogel if I wasn't ftm!!?) and if that meant I had grown up female. Also why I was referred to the gender clinic and how I was changing myself. And to top it all off I had to tell him he had to send the blood test results to the gender clinic; which should have been obvious. I get this us the first time I've seen him, I get that GPs don't receive training about being transgender, I get he's older and out of touch; but my god can you at least try to not look at me like I'm a freak!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on June 14, 2017, 11:30:49 am
My legal name change is held up in bureaucratic limbo.  They want me to provide a document that does not exist.  I have calls in to the provincial ombudsman and to my MLA to see if they can help.  Without the name change, I will be dead-named and misgendered forever.  Grrrrr!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: FTMDiaries on June 16, 2017, 10:41:18 am
I have a sneaking suspicion, which has been building for a little while now, that my job is in jeopardy.

All of the Directors of the business have been acting strangely towards me, and I'm being excluded from projects that are my sole responsibility. Then yesterday there was a mysterious phone call from our HR consultant (who advises them on all their hirings & firings) - which is very strange considering they're not hiring anyone at the moment - and the person who took that call has been out of the office for most of the day, possibly in a meeting with said consultant. I asked to see my Line Manager today to discuss my concerns with him, and he's avoiding me like the plague.... which is his MO when he doesn't want to get involved in conversations that might implicate him.

Something is definitely afoot.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ainsley on June 16, 2017, 11:56:23 am
I have a sneaking suspicion, which has been building for a little while now, that my job is in jeopardy.

All of the Directors of the business have been acting strangely towards me, and I'm being excluded from projects that are my sole responsibility. Then yesterday there was a mysterious phone call from our HR consultant (who advises them on all their hirings & firings) - which is very strange considering they're not hiring anyone at the moment - and the person who took that call has been out of the office for most of the day, possibly in a meeting with said consultant. I asked to see my Line Manager today to discuss my concerns with him, and he's avoiding me like the plague.... which is his MO when he doesn't want to get involved in conversations that might implicate him.

Something is definitely afoot.

Ruh Roh, Shaggy!  That does not sound good.  Hopefully you are just being as paranoid as I would be and it is really nothing involving you.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on June 16, 2017, 12:09:35 pm
I have a sneaking suspicion, which has been building for a little while now, that my job is in jeopardy.

All of the Directors of the business have been acting strangely towards me, and I'm being excluded from projects that are my sole responsibility. Then yesterday there was a mysterious phone call from our HR consultant (who advises them on all their hirings & firings) - which is very strange considering they're not hiring anyone at the moment - and the person who took that call has been out of the office for most of the day, possibly in a meeting with said consultant. I asked to see my Line Manager today to discuss my concerns with him, and he's avoiding me like the plague.... which is his MO when he doesn't want to get involved in conversations that might implicate him.

Something is definitely afoot.

Are you coming up on an anniversary of employment?  How long have you been there?  Could it be your turn for a promotion?  Did anything spectacular happen with one of your accounts?  A milestone birthday, maybe?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on June 16, 2017, 01:57:54 pm
I have a sneaking suspicion, which has been building for a little while now, that my job is in jeopardy.

All of the Directors of the business have been acting strangely towards me, and I'm being excluded from projects that are my sole responsibility. Then yesterday there was a mysterious phone call from our HR consultant (who advises them on all their hirings & firings) - which is very strange considering they're not hiring anyone at the moment - and the person who took that call has been out of the office for most of the day, possibly in a meeting with said consultant. I asked to see my Line Manager today to discuss my concerns with him, and he's avoiding me like the plague.... which is his MO when he doesn't want to get involved in conversations that might implicate him.

Something is definitely afoot.
I seem to remember something about an issue with a co worker a while ago. It's possible that some miss information was planted with HR and there is a conversation taking place behind your back about this. If my memory is correct, you may need to see HR and have a discussion with them.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on June 17, 2017, 03:16:35 pm
My divorce will be final on Wednesday.

I'll be single and living on my own for the first time in my life.  That's odd enough, but... 

I'm a woman.  I'm a lesbian, blue jean femme.  I am trans.

With that combination I'll be single and living on my own for the rest of my life.  It's got me a bit down today.  I've got therapy scheduled next week.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on June 17, 2017, 03:44:56 pm
Got dead named and miss-gendered a few times during dinner and I hate it that I have so much troubles with my voice.

And today is the last evening before going back home. No more snorkeling in the ocean for quit some time...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: HannahHindle on June 18, 2017, 05:35:50 pm
I fell into a barrel at work today...yeah.

I work as an actor in a scare attraction and one role is where you sit in a barrel and play a talking severed head. As I was getting in a slipped and scraped my leg. Ouch.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on June 19, 2017, 03:26:43 am
I think I have laryngitis. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: MissKairi on June 19, 2017, 04:49:09 pm
a little silly but in my dreams I was really angry so I woke up angry and hating everyone.
actually cried a little at how silly this os
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: brandyvgs on June 19, 2017, 06:17:23 pm
Got up, get ready for work, just about to leave to be early for work and my car battery died and it needed to be replaced as the vegas heat does not like to treat things nicely. 

used a project car that I was restoring to replace it at autozone and it died 1/2 way there due to a malfunction with a sensor caused also by the heat.

2 and 1/2 hours later I made it to work since I am salary based I have to stay the full 8 hours, which is a good thing.

for lunch I ordered something simple so I can just get something in my stomach and they where rude and argued with me how I wanted my food made so I ended up being irritated mood all day. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on June 23, 2017, 02:58:10 am
What I thought was my voice dropping actually turned out to be laryngitis. I'm so sore and rather than a low voice, I have no voice at all.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on June 23, 2017, 08:06:04 pm
This morning my Daughter drops in and at the same time my other daughter rings so whilst her at my place a 4 way conversation takes place and during this I am misgendered 4 times...I don't say anything to anyone but keep it to myself. I was irritated about it, yes, so my wife asks me what is wrong and I tell here to not worry about it too much as it is something I can deal with no issues...but despite this, she proceeds to prod me about why , and I keep trying to fob her off saying its Ok don't worry about.

It was accidental on their part and even though it still hurts I did not want to make a deal out of it...but she kept saying is it "X"? or maybe its because of "Y" and in the end I got exasperated and told her...
                                                                                                         
So now she has the shits on because I "called her out" on pronouns(which I didn't)...wholly crap I did everything I could not to get into the conversation

Being misgendered hurts, and whilst I tried to keep it to myself because it was a simple mistake it has now blown up  in my face...aaarrrrrggghhh!!!! 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on June 24, 2017, 08:25:54 am
Just lost (or had stolen?) my purse,  with my brand new drivers license. Now the nuisance of cancelling cards and paying out for a new license,  and I loved that purse!

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on June 24, 2017, 10:08:23 am
51 years ago we had the Compton's Cafeteria riot in San Francisco, where a transgender woman wh became fed up and frustrated over constant harassment by authorities lobbed a coffee cup at a cop who was there arresting her again for the terrible crime of bein ger authentic self.

Yesterday I marched with 7,000 other transgender people and their allies in a huge protest of current policies that seek to criminalize us for being our authentic selves.  This was no parade or celebration, but a real protest, with signs, chants, singing and walking in solidarity.

51 damn years, 51 YEARS of this, and nothing has changed.  Oh, there are pockets of acceptance, but look at what is going on.  More laws are being passed to restrict our lives.  Government protections for our youth are being torn down.  We're barely tolerated by the gay and lesbian communities, and the Human Rights Campaign routinely throws us under the bus if supporting trans issues becomes inconvenient.

This has me unhappy today.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on June 26, 2017, 04:11:31 am
Finding out that someone has been "shooting up" in the community bathroom which is reserved for the care takers and such
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on June 26, 2017, 06:11:02 am
51 years ago we had the Compton's Cafeteria riot in San Francisco, where a transgender woman wh became fed up and frustrated over constant harassment by authorities lobbed a coffee cup at a cop who was there arresting her again for the terrible crime of bein ger authentic self.

Yesterday I marched with 7,000 other transgender people and their allies in a huge protest of current policies that seek to criminalize us for being our authentic selves.  This was no parade or celebration, but a real protest, with signs, chants, singing and walking in solidarity.

51 damn years, 51 YEARS of this, and nothing has changed.  Oh, there are pockets of acceptance, but look at what is going on.  More laws are being passed to restrict our lives.  Government protections for our youth are being torn down.  We're barely tolerated by the gay and lesbian communities, and the Human Rights Campaign routinely throws us under the bus if supporting trans issues becomes inconvenient.

This has me unhappy today.

I hear you.

51 years ago a brave woman stood for her rights as a human being and 51 years later brave men and women celebrate it.

A brave woman was threatened in the street and she overcame her fear.

A woman had to have radical throat surgery and was terrified - her medical team cleared the theatre and restricted access to preserve her dignity.

Transgender people are in the news and not as freaks but as men and women in society; Doctors, Lawyers, Journalists, Shop Assistants, Cleaners - PEOPLE.

51 years ago I was thinking of, trying or recovering from a suicide attempt.

We have a long way to go but we fight for our rights.

Be happy about that and celebrate and be proud.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 26, 2017, 09:05:46 am
I received word that an acquaintance, a co-worker of Randi's, passed away last night.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Rachel_Christina on June 26, 2017, 11:49:14 am
I been told I have to leave my apparament in mid August.
This was a work building and I paid literally nothing on Rent, in Switzerland. Apartments wher I am usually cost around 1500, so I don't think I will be able to find another, and will probably have to leave, return to poor Ireland :/
I can't believe it will end like this.
And I will have to find new work, and I will have to do it as a girl, but I'm still not so confident with my terrible voice.
I can't start new work and have them to come out again to everyone :/
What a day :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: MissKairi on June 26, 2017, 06:42:25 pm
I been told I have to leave my apparament in mid August.
This was a work building and I paid literally nothing on Rent, in Switzerland. Apartments wher I am usually cost around 1500, so I don't think I will be able to find another, and will probably have to leave, return to poor Ireland :/
I can't believe it will end like this.
And I will have to find new work, and I will have to do it as a girl, but I'm still not so confident with my terrible voice.
I can't start new work and have them to come out again to everyone :/
What a day :(

I feel your pain girl!
Not exactly the same but I WILL have to leave my job and try to find a new one as a girl.

So just so you kmow, you arent alone :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Rachel_Christina on June 26, 2017, 11:27:16 pm
Thanks Laura, and sorry to hear that.
I too will have to look as a girl. Thinking of returning to study though as it now that I am right in myself, I would really give it a good go this time.
Thanks again girl, stuck in this boat with me :')
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on July 01, 2017, 03:27:24 pm
Right after my laryngitis healed up, I got either the flu or another virus of some sort. I feel horrible and I can't eat or leave my bed, even going to the bathroom is too much for me. Here's to hoping it's just a bug that'll go away within the next day or so.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: meatwagon on July 01, 2017, 08:50:02 pm
this may just be a small thing, but being reminded i'm not allowed to keep a window cracked in my room.  i live with my grandma and she has the AC on all the time.  not only is AC really aggravating to my sinus problems, but my room has the worst air circulation in the house.  if i don't have an open window to let in fresh air, it STINKS.  no amount of cleaning helps, and fans just contribute to the dry air problem.  so i crack my bedroom window just enough to air it out, and of course she notices and gives me a fuss about it.  doesn't help that i work maintenance, so i'm constantly being covered in garbage.  i'd like to just have one place in my life that doesn't smell like rotten armpits...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on July 02, 2017, 09:15:14 pm
Melancholy rather than unhappy. Tonight I'm strongly feeling the loss of what HRT has cost me. I still live with Randi. She treats me well, like a cherished girl friend, but the love that was in her smile is gone.

I know it would have been anyway.  I really don't think I would have lived this long had I not transitioned. I'm almost sorry so little has actually changed. The wound in my heart has had no chance to heal. I don't think the wound in hers has either.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on July 02, 2017, 10:56:56 pm
I had woken up a bit earlier than usual but didn't feel well so went to lay back down awhile

Had just fallen asleep and was beginning to dream about something when I was awoken by a knock at the door, just rolled over started to go back to sleep but was awoken again

Thought there might be something amiss or someone may need help so I went to answer the door

Turned out to be a couple of women from one of the local congregations and one of them was wearing perfume that could choke a horse 

Not only could I not get back to sleep but now I also have the sinus headache from the bad place that just doesn't seem to want to go away :P

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on July 03, 2017, 07:48:11 am
Calling Social Security as they've locked me out of my account... After waiting for a ridiculous amount of time, a woman answered, but because of a tic I couldn't answer within the one second she gave me to answer, and next thing I knew she said "Thank you for calling" and had hung up on me. What the hell?  >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on July 03, 2017, 07:50:37 am
Calling Social Security as they've locked me out of my account... After waiting for a ridiculous amount of time, a woman answered, but because of a tic I couldn't answer within the one second she gave me to answer, and next thing I knew she said "Thank you for calling" and had hung up on me. What the hell?  >:(

How infuriating... :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on July 03, 2017, 07:56:05 am
Calling Social Security as they've locked me out of my account... After waiting for a ridiculous amount of time, a woman answered, but because of a tic I couldn't answer within the one second she gave me to answer, and next thing I knew she said "Thank you for calling" and had hung up on me. What the hell?  >:(

Sounds like she was having a bad day  >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on July 03, 2017, 08:23:54 am
Sounds like she was having a bad day  >:(
How infuriating... :(
Worry not my friends, I was able to get another call in and everything was set by a very friendly and understanding man. Thank god!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on July 03, 2017, 08:46:24 am
Worry not my friends, I was able to get another call in and everything was set by a very friendly and understanding man. Thank god!

Ah good! :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Rainbow Dash on July 06, 2017, 12:25:59 am
A bit late but, my Ex wife died on the 27th last month. we hadnt even been divorced 3 months. It was a blood clot that shut down her heart. We had been married for 16 years.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on July 06, 2017, 01:45:48 am
A bit late but, my Ex wife died on the 27th last month. we hadnt even been divorced 3 months. It was a blood clot that shut down her heart. We had been married for 16 years.

I am so sorry for your loss, Hope you are doing OK
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on July 06, 2017, 06:40:35 am
Dash, I'm so sorry!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ghostbees on July 06, 2017, 11:04:02 am
Going back to cigs


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on July 06, 2017, 11:17:21 am
Going back to cigs


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

At least you stopped for a bit; that's more than most people are able to manage; next time you'll be able to hold out for a bit longer :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ghostbees on July 06, 2017, 11:18:25 am
At least you stopped for a bit; that's more than most people are able to manage; next time you'll be able to hold out for a bit longer :)
Thank you!!
I was noticing the benefits too



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on July 06, 2017, 06:27:40 pm
I have to get a buy-in from twelve frikken agencies in order to take a week off. If I take it without their agreement I'm breaking a state law.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on July 08, 2017, 03:51:39 pm
Lost my glasses and I'm dreading how much it will cost to replace them  :-\
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Devlyn on July 08, 2017, 04:09:19 pm
A bit late but, my Ex wife died on the 27th last month. we hadnt even been divorced 3 months. It was a blood clot that shut down her heart. We had been married for 16 years.

Big hug. Sorry to hear that, hon.

Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on July 08, 2017, 08:19:18 pm
A bit late but, my Ex wife died on the 27th last month. we hadnt even been divorced 3 months. It was a blood clot that shut down her heart. We had been married for 16 years.

I've lost friends and relatives including a significant other over the years

I feel your pain

Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on August 06, 2017, 07:58:05 am
Reading the news from the U.S..  Texas, Washington DC, it's all bad for my sisters and brothers down there. 

In 1933, the reign of terror in Europe began with burning the library of the leading doctor of transgender patients.  They came for us first.  I hope that history does not repeat itself too closely.  Remember what it took to stop him last time.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ryuichi13 on August 08, 2017, 03:54:34 pm
I'm hoping this thread is for FtM as well.

My Mom knows that I have legally changed my name to one that she's unfamiliar with.  She doesn't know why yet.  But to hear her call me by my deadname when she called me this afternoon made me wince. 

I never hated my deadname, its actually a very pretty name.  It just was never me.  It belonged to someone else.

So to be called by it hurt.  It was like Mom was talking about someone else.

I suppose its time I told her why I changed my name.  Its just that I wanted to tell her face to face, when she could actually SEE my (13 year old boy's) beard and mustache as well as hear my now much deeper voice.  I wish she was more tech-savvy, I'd just videochat with her instead of having to wait until I can see her face to face.

Anyways, thanks for letting me unload.  It still hurts, but not quite as much.

Ryuichi   

Sent from my SM-G930P using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on August 12, 2017, 12:14:18 am
Nearly 4 months on T and no sign of my voice dropping any time soon. It's weaker, but it's been weaker since two weeks on T and still nothing has happened. My face is changing, and I'm even getting a bit more peach fuzz but my voice has yet to do anything.
I've had so many false alarms that just turned out to be sore throat from sickness or overuse. I got so excited every time but I'm still waiting.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on August 12, 2017, 12:22:06 am
You could be fighting your voice drop as that sometimes happens. When you speak, relax the muscles between your larynx and your jaw. If they are the least bit tensed, they will put you  in the head voice, something a FTM is best avoiding.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on August 12, 2017, 12:44:08 pm
Someone, with the best of intentions, posted a picture of the card section at their local Target. It was a close up of a section: "Wife to Wife Anniversary". I started sobbing. Tears are still in my eyes. I will never get that card and Randi will never accept one from me. By decree our anniversary is never to be noted or celebrated.

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on August 14, 2017, 05:15:07 am
Slow rolling panic attacks. I hate days like today.

:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on August 14, 2017, 05:16:36 am
Slow rolling panic attacks. I hate days like today.

:(

That doesn't sound very nice, hope you are feeling a bit better now  ;)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on August 14, 2017, 02:53:14 pm
Had a really nice Tinder match but the second I disclosed my Trans* status the Match was gone.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Geeker on August 27, 2017, 10:25:58 am
What made me unhappy today is the same thing that does every day, morning wood. I hate it. Nothing ruins my day like waking up and rolling over only to realize there's a "kickstand" painfully stopping me.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on August 28, 2017, 02:12:28 am
You could be fighting your voice drop as that sometimes happens. When you speak, relax the muscles between your larynx and your jaw. If they are the least bit tensed, they will put you  in the head voice, something a FTM is best avoiding.
Thanks for the advice Dena, it's a bit difficult to follow though since I have Tourette's and my neck and jaw are constantly tense due to tics. However, my T dose has been upped recently and my voice is getting weaker without any other signs of sickness, so that's good!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on August 28, 2017, 04:58:27 pm
Everything


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on August 28, 2017, 05:51:12 pm
Everything


  I know the feeling Trudy.  But you need to look forward to better days. It's hard to do I know, but have faith that those better days are out there ahead of us.

"The sun will come out tomorrow. Tomorrow! And tomorrow is only a day away!"

  Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on August 28, 2017, 07:23:10 pm
  I know the feeling Trudy.  But you need to look forward to better days. It's hard to do I know, but have faith that those better days are out there ahead of us.

"The sun will come out tomorrow. Tomorrow! And tomorrow is only a day away!"

  Hugs,
   Laurie
It’s been one of those days. To top the day off, I made some very pointed remarks on a Slack channel that we’re meant for another. I can’t wait for the fallout on that.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on August 28, 2017, 07:48:42 pm
It’s been one of those days. To top the day off, I made some very pointed remarks on a Slack channel that we’re meant for another. I can’t wait for the fallout on that.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro


 oooopsie  ((Hugs))

 Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on August 28, 2017, 07:49:30 pm

 Same thing as yesterday. But I'm going to survive it.

Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on August 28, 2017, 07:55:50 pm
Head cold plus analgesics plus numbing cream (EMLA) plus four hours of electrolysis...  Not Recommended... 

Recovering from Side Effect City.  Hey, I can sort of type again!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on September 04, 2017, 12:26:01 am
Opened a window to let some fresh air in only to have the smoke from the local wildfires come wafting in  :P  Now I have the sinus headache from the "Bad Place"
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on September 04, 2017, 11:04:31 pm
My online school program keeps deleting my notes. It sucks!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on September 08, 2017, 05:27:17 am
Let's just leave it at anxiety-pocalypse-meltdown-panic-attack. Now on medication and waiting lists for this and that, oh and my partner now knows about my self harm. The only possible upside is cbt is in the pipeline... that's going to be fun. (Sarcasm off).

Rowan.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on September 08, 2017, 01:14:05 pm
I started to include my work environment in the last couple of weeks into my transition.

It looks like today I had the first hiccup. A partner tries to take away a project...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on September 08, 2017, 03:21:11 pm
The Southern Comfort Transgender Conference that I've been planning for and looking forward to for weeks has been canceled.

Oh, and on Sunday night a hurricane is going to go right over my house.

Steph
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on September 10, 2017, 12:48:04 am
Not only am I unhappy but I'm a bit angry and feel violated as well

Came home from my therapist appointment friday, looked about and thought my apartment looked a bit off  :-\

I was rather tired and had promised to go over and jam on guitars with one of my neighbors so I didn't think much of it

So I get up on Saturday to start my usual routine of making coffee and getting my vitamins and med.s together only to find that my script of E tabs have gone missing from the cupboard, my spiro. is misplaced but it is still there but the E is gone  >:(

I already know that some of my neighbors are kinda weird but who the hecks busts in just to nick a bottle of estradiol and how did they know exactly where to go?

Ugh, I love my little apt. but I hate the place where I live  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on September 10, 2017, 12:53:44 am
Not only am I unhappy but I'm a bit angry and feel violated as well

Came home from my therapist appointment friday, looked about and thought my apartment looked a bit off  :-\

I was rather tired and had promised to go over and jam on guitars with one of my neighbors so I didn't think much of it

So I get up on Saturday to start my usual routine of making coffee and getting my vitamins and med.s together only to find that my script of E tabs have gone missing from the cupboard, my spiro. is misplaced but it is still there but the E is gone  >:(

I already know that some of my neighbors are kinda weird but who the hecks busts in just to nick a bottle of estradiol and how did they know exactly where to go?

Ugh, I love my little apt. but I hate the place where I live  :P

 I'd be mad too. Perhaps they can't read and think they are viagra. lol Now that would serve them right.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on September 10, 2017, 02:06:17 am
Time for sticks in the windows and sliding glass doors so they can't be opened from outside. If the locks can be opened with a card, time for a new lock or a bolt lock. Otherwise, ask the manager to rekey the lock(s).
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on September 10, 2017, 04:52:50 am
Yes, I already have sticks in the windows and have had the deadbolt on the front door changed once, I don't have a sliding glass or back door

I'm hoping the mgr. will be willing to have the deadbolt replaced again but I'm thinking it may be better for me to buy my own deadbolt because getting repairs made here is like pulling teeth

Everything has gone downhill since the new management co. took the place over
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on September 10, 2017, 07:50:57 am
Good news  ;D  The person who took my E tabs has returned them

I didn't particularly like being woken up by someone banging on my door, but I was glad to see my E tabs in a paper sack with some kind of cartoon character on it

Weird, oh well maybe they figured out that they weren't what they wanted

Going back to bed
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on September 10, 2017, 08:10:47 am
Good news  ;D  The person who took my E tabs has returned them

I didn't particularly like being woken up by someone banging on my door, but I was glad to see my E tabs in a paper sack with some kind of cartoon character on it

Weird, oh well maybe they figured out that they weren't what they wanted

Going back to bed

Check and make sure they weren't tampered with.  There are some really weird people out there.

Maybe they thought it was a pill that gets you high??????  I here one of them is blue.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on September 10, 2017, 08:53:23 am
We spent yesterday afternoon with an old college "friend". We were part of the same clique and grated on each other a bit. We've both mellowed more than a bit. I'm sad to find that we both have PTSD from being in Manhattan on 9/11 and we talked of that a bit. It was also obvious to me and confirmed by his wife, that he has a traumatic brain injury. It's not as serious as my clients' but clouds his thinking. He misgendered me several times. It's understandable, but has shaken my confidence a bit, especially as I'm running out of makeup.

Also I'm beginning to think that I need to leave the work I love because the business model jus doesn't work in this area.

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on September 10, 2017, 09:16:29 am
Check and make sure they weren't tampered with.  There are some really weird people out there.

Maybe they thought it was a pill that gets you high??????  I here one of them is blue.

Good advise, and yes I did look them over and they look O.K.

Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: King Malachite on September 11, 2017, 02:48:03 am
Thinking about my mother who passed away in October....my one and only blood relative who was accepting/tolerating of me being trans.  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on September 11, 2017, 05:07:49 am
Thinking about my mother who passed away in October....my one and only blood relative who was accepting/tolerating of me being trans.  :(

Hugs my brother.

I'm around for a few hours if you want to PM me.

Cindy
Title: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on September 11, 2017, 06:27:02 am
A summary of my last 4 weeks before telling you what made me unhappy: After 4 months of coming out to everyone and starting HRT, my ex broke up with me which made me depressed and made me stop everything.

So we started talking again and I was contemplating the possibility of not transitioning and just experimenting with my look for now, like still letting my hair grow, trying to look a bit more androgynous. I am feeling I could be somewhere in the spectrum where I don't need to transition (if this is actually true or just a defense mechanism due to what happened, I still don't know). Anyways I was talking to him today and he said that he doesn't like long hair either. My heart sunk cuz it made me feel like there's nothing I can do, besides looking strictly masculine, that will make this work. I feel like I have to choose between doing something about my dysphoria and having a relationship.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on September 11, 2017, 07:33:22 am
The worst thing you can do is force yourself to be different to please someone else, or so I believe.

Today is September 11. I was working in Manhattan that day. Enough said.

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on September 11, 2017, 07:57:24 am
The worst thing you can do is force yourself to be different to please someone else, or so I believe.

You know what the saddest part is? I know that and I keep repeating myself that. But I'm feeling so sad and lost that I can't help it. Don't really have the strength at the moment to tell my fears to screw off and don't want to feel alone.

Today is September 11. I was working in Manhattan that day.

Sorry about that


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on September 15, 2017, 08:24:53 pm
Sister is having complications with her pregnancy.  She is having twins, first time mother.  She is in her mid to late 30's.  Her twins are not growing correctly, one is much smaller than the other, and apparently the blood is not pumping to the smaller of the two the way it should.  She has been hospitalized to maintain checks on the boys.  She is due in December, so a bit worried.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on September 15, 2017, 09:36:37 pm
That is indeed something to worry about Clair. I hope they all are okay when the time comes. Also keep in mind hospitals can work wonders in the NICUs these days. You would be surprised what they are able to do with at risk babies now.

Hugs,
  Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on September 15, 2017, 09:43:22 pm
 My face itches.  :(   day one in prep for electrolysis on the 18th, 20th, and 26th. That's right 3 one hour sessions in 8 days.  I hope my last estradiol increase does not make it hurt more like the last increase did.  I am not looking forward to it. I also have other appointments elsewhere, first voice on the 27th and  another therapy session on the 28th too.

 With so many appointments it is almost a uggh plan.

Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jessica on September 16, 2017, 12:55:28 am
I bumped my freshly budded boob on a door jamb.  I yelped, then laughed.  I had been warned.
Yow, Jessica 🙆
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on September 16, 2017, 07:57:28 am
I bumped my freshly budded boob on a door jamb.  I yelped, then laughed.  I had been warned.
Yow, Jessica

Yup, with ya there, Jessica. I got down on the floor to pull Rosie the Roomba out from under a table yesterday (she's not as smart as the Jetson's Rosie), and rolled over onto my chest. Yow, indeed! Shoulda known better. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Though, if cross-posting were allowed, this could also be put under the "What made you happy today" topic.

Stephanie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on September 16, 2017, 07:57:59 am
I bumped my freshly budded boob on a door jamb.  I yelped, then laughed.  I had been warned.
Yow, Jessica

Yup, with ya there, Jessica. I got down on the floor to pull Rosie the Roomba out from under a table yesterday (she's not as smart as the Jetson's Rosie), and rolled over onto my chest. Yow, indeed! Shoulda known better. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Though, if cross-posting were allowed, this could also be put under the "What made you happy today" topic.

Stephanie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on September 16, 2017, 04:10:47 pm
I bumped my freshly budded boob on a door jamb.  I yelped, then laughed.  I had been warned.
Yow, Jessica 🙆

Ah yes, nearly gave a deliver man a coronary when I swung the door open a few years ago  :o  What can I say? I was exited about the package arriving

Must make way for new clearances  :icon_chick:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on September 17, 2017, 09:43:40 am
Since Friday I had a total of 14 hours of electrolysis. Especially today it did hurt a lot. Not looking forward for the next session planned in two weeks.

I'm asking myself why is there no other option, so many people want to get rid of hair all over their body and still no quicker option...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on September 17, 2017, 11:06:22 am
Since Friday I had a total of 14 hours of electrolysis. Especially today it did hurt a lot. Not looking forward for the next session planned in two weeks.

I'm asking myself why is there no other option, so many people want to get rid of hair all over their body and still no quicker option...
Nanomachines, tailored viruses? Any possibility I can think of requires tech we don't quite have yet. It would be really great if HRT could reprogram facial hair the way it does body hair, but no dice. I find this sadly humorous since one of my Endo team seems to think that it does. Well, it does but not as much as she expects.

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on September 18, 2017, 02:39:00 pm
I had too much to drink last Saturday and got into a big fight with my ex. I said horrible things and ended up crying: Needless to say I was super depressed on Sunday and still am today. I just hate to lose control like that, and alcohol makes things worse.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on September 18, 2017, 10:31:30 pm
Got word on my sister and her twins.  She has preeclampsia.  She has now been confined to the hospital until they are born.

Luckily her job, and the hospital, will allow her to work from her room.  Lucky for her, her work is all digital.

But now, I won't get to see her before the boys are born. :icon_cry2:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on September 20, 2017, 11:47:44 am


Nanomachines, tailored viruses? Any possibility I can think of requires tech we don't quite have yet. It would be really great if HRT could reprogram facial hair the way it does body hair, but no dice. I find this sadly humorous since one of my Endo team seems to think that it does. Well, it does but not as much as she expects

Yes, something like this, gene therapy.
I would be an improvement to kill at least all the hairs that are zapped 100% not only the hairs in the right grow cycle.

Something quicker, inject, next hair, inject, next hair and so on... *just dreaming*
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on September 20, 2017, 11:50:34 am
I had too much to drink last Saturday and got into a big fight with my ex. I said horrible things and ended up crying: Needless to say I was super depressed on Sunday and still am today. I just hate to lose control like that, and alcohol makes things worse.
I don't speak to my EX at all because I know it would go that way without a drop of alcohol. Since I lost any respect for her I just try to be as low contact as possible and only in written form.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on September 20, 2017, 01:55:33 pm
This happened over the weekend, and I've told a couple people already.  I was at my electroligist having a good session, lots of banter.  My electroligist made the comment of "there's nothing sexier than a girl with a brain" directing this to me.  I totally took it the wrong way and had to fight back tears.  It was like the comment "she's got a great personality"  meaning not pretty, but has something to make up for it.  I still feel sad over it, even though I know she didn't mean it that way.  In my mind I immediately went to, I'll never be pretty and I'll never find anyone to accept me.  I had to ask her to stop and we talked about something else during the session.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on September 21, 2017, 12:30:23 pm
My dad's always giving me a hard time about having all these girly interests if I'm going to transition, but I really couldn't care less. My interests are my interests. My favorite color is pink, I love stuffed animals and squishies and porcelain dolls, and I wear animal slippers around the house; it doesn't change my gender identity.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on September 21, 2017, 01:22:06 pm
My dad's always giving me a hard time about having all these girly interests if I'm going to transition, but I really couldn't care less. My interests are my interests. My favorite color is pink, I love stuffed animals and squishies and porcelain dolls, and I wear animal slippers around the house; it doesn't change my gender identity.

Great to hear you're now more confident within your gender identity;  having read your earlier posts.
I'm a very fem trans man as well who has an ftm friend who is also very fem and cos plays as female manga characters. He's very good at it.

Feminine male solidarity  ;D
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on September 21, 2017, 09:21:30 pm
Great to hear you're now more confident within your gender identity;  having read your earlier posts.
I'm a very fem trans man as well who has an ftm friend who is also very fem and cos plays as female manga characters. He's very good at it.

Feminine male solidarity  ;D
If I could like this reply I would! But I can't, so I'll just say thanks for it :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: HappyMoni on September 23, 2017, 02:46:04 pm
It is a beautiful day today. I'm supposed to go out to some street party, maybe hear music, stuff I like to do. All I feel is incredibly, horribly, grumpy, ready to chew people's heads off. Haven't felt that in a long time. Maybe it will help that I say it. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrh!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on September 23, 2017, 02:57:11 pm
It is a beautiful day today. I'm supposed to go out to some street party, maybe hear music, stuff I like to do. All I feel is incredibly, horribly, grumpy, ready to chew people's heads off. Haven't felt that in a long time. Maybe it will help that I say it. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrh!

  You can be grumpy and chew on me if it will help.

Hugs,
  Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on September 24, 2017, 11:13:51 pm
Great to hear you're now more confident within your gender identity;  having read your earlier posts.
I'm a very fem trans man as well who has an ftm friend who is also very fem and cos plays as female manga characters. He's very good at it.

Feminine male solidarity  ;D

Haha wow!! I have to say that is kinda awesome. Are you guys attracted to men?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on September 24, 2017, 11:15:49 pm
Sunday was really tough for me. I woke up feeling lonely and sad. Nothing really happened, I just felt that way. Today I feel way better and stable, I just need to keep myself busy.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on September 25, 2017, 02:19:47 am
I'm afraid I have moved from contemplation into the planning stage  :-\  Sorry
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on September 25, 2017, 03:29:42 am
I'm afraid I have moved from contemplation into the planning stage  :-\  Sorry

I'm on skype Sis. I may have my own problems but I am your sister and I am here for you.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on September 25, 2017, 02:07:27 pm
Haha wow!! I have to say that is kinda awesome. Are you guys attracted to men?
I can’t answer for Elis, but personally I’m bisexual with a preference for men, but I have a wonderful girlfriend who I love with all my heart. :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: maksim on September 25, 2017, 02:08:43 pm
The depression is seriously starting to hit me now. Gotta love bipolar.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on September 25, 2017, 02:44:39 pm
Haha wow!! I have to say that is kinda awesome. Are you guys attracted to men?

Thanks :). I'm definitely demisexual but unsure which gender I'm more romantically attracted too. My friend is asexual too but happens to be gay.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on September 25, 2017, 05:00:27 pm
 I see, that’s nice!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on September 27, 2017, 10:08:22 am
PMS.  Massive PMS.

My admiration for ciswomen and their self-control has risen immeasurably.  How a woman can go through this so many times, and not leave a trail of male bodies in her wake is truely a measure of immense discipline and endurance.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on September 27, 2017, 02:35:50 pm
OW, OW, OW, OW, OW!!  I learned today that female skin is a lot more easily damaged than male skin, and it hurts a lot more.

I was getting ready to dump a garden cart loaded with rocks over the edge of the driveway.  Unfortunately, it got too close to the edge and rolled away on me.  (Silly me, I should have chocked the wheels!)  The smart but expensive thing to do would have been to let go and let the cart get smashed to smithereens.  Instead, I tried to control it, and got my shins banged for my trouble.  Nothing broken, just some abrasions and contusions, but damn, that hurt!

I still have scars from the last time I banged my shins.  Now I have a matched set.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Thessa on October 05, 2017, 09:05:53 am
Yesterday my bathroom, toilet and service room was demolished due to water leakage some times ago and they had to remove all the wet material before starting the drying process, which will take a few weeks.

But what makes me really sad and unhappy is that I tried for the past three day to explain that it's not a (lifestyle) choice to transition to a (moderate?) religious person and she was not able a accept that it's a medical condition that is treated like any other medical condition.

She said that I construct everything in my favor and I had to reply that she is (also) cherry picking what fits in her world view. She is always celebrating love and acceptance but when I asked her in case her beloved husband would have an accident or would be struck by illness that would change his outer shell if she would leave him instantly without trying. That's not the same it wouldn't be a choice he wouldn't make, it would happen to him...

She said I compare apples and pears.
Do I?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: HappyMoni on October 05, 2017, 03:49:29 pm
Thessa,
   Accepting your argument probably would mean she would have to adjust her world view. Too mind blowing or threatening for some. You had a mind and body that didn't match. It is amazing that someone else thinks they can tell you which to adjust. She says your mind. You know that was impossible. Her argument is as leaky as your bathroom was.
Moni
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on October 06, 2017, 04:29:38 am
PMS.  Massive PMS.

My admiration for ciswomen and their self-control has risen immeasurably.  How a woman can go through this so many times, and not leave a trail of male bodies in her wake is truely a measure of immense discipline and endurance.

 And you say I can come visit? I'm not sure that would be safe.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on October 07, 2017, 01:14:17 am
PMS.  Massive PMS.

My admiration for ciswomen and their self-control has risen immeasurably.  How a woman can go through this so many times, and not leave a trail of male bodies in her wake is truely a measure of immense discipline and endurance.

 And you say I can come visit? I'm not sure that would be safe.

It's under control now.  Mostly.  I think.  The honey badgers have reassured me that everything is just fine now, and I don't need to bother feeding them for a while.  I'm not sure I understand that last bit.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on October 08, 2017, 06:35:10 pm
Yesterday my bathroom, toilet and service room was demolished due to water leakage some times ago and they had to remove all the wet material before starting the drying process, which will take a few weeks.

But what makes me really sad and unhappy is that I tried for the past three day to explain that it's not a (lifestyle) choice to transition to a (moderate?) religious person and she was not able a accept that it's a medical condition that is treated like any other medical condition.

She said that I construct everything in my favor and I had to reply that she is (also) cherry picking what fits in her world view. She is always celebrating love and acceptance but when I asked her in case her beloved husband would have an accident or would be struck by illness that would change his outer shell if she would leave him instantly without trying. That's not the same it wouldn't be a choice he wouldn't make, it would happen to him...

She said I compare apples and pears.
Do I?

Most religious people are stuck in their ways, trying to convince them (or anyone really) of anything different is impossible. I'd say don't waste your time explaining yourself to her and let her think whatever she wants. You are happy and that's all that matters :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: DawnOday on October 08, 2017, 10:26:26 pm
I binge watched Hand Maids Tale all day today. The show is truly very good. But so much of it is possible it is like reading a forecast of the future. A future my 3 1/2 month old grand daughter will inherit unless we stand up now. It is not a future anyone I know would want to live.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: DawnOday on October 08, 2017, 10:40:41 pm
Yesterday my bathroom, toilet and service room was demolished due to water leakage some times ago and they had to remove all the wet material before starting the drying process, which will take a few weeks.

But what makes me really sad and unhappy is that I tried for the past three day to explain that it's not a (lifestyle) choice to transition to a (moderate?) religious person and she was not able a accept that it's a medical condition that is treated like any other medical condition.

She said that I construct everything in my favor and I had to reply that she is (also) cherry picking what fits in her world view. She is always celebrating love and acceptance but when I asked her in case her beloved husband would have an accident or would be struck by illness that would change his outer shell if she would leave him instantly without trying. That's not the same it wouldn't be a choice he wouldn't make, it would happen to him...

She said I compare apples and pears.
Do I?

When piety is on the line religious zealots will dig in their heels. Funny how a fairy tale is taken on faith, but science is ignored or construed as trying to construct every thing in our favor. I'll take science over unproven fairy tales any day. Too bad Evangelicals feel they have to interpret everything for us. Anyone with a couple of brain cells can actually do it for ourselves. I used to think I knew this country. I thought love, compassion, empathy were hallmarks of our society. Then I saw Trump throwing paper towels. Invite her to a support group meeting. You can't know what you don't know.but they like to think they do.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on October 09, 2017, 05:33:19 am
I binge watched Hand Maids Tale all day today. The show is truly very good. But so much of it is possible it is like reading a forecast of the future. A future my 3 1/2 month old grand daughter will inherit unless we stand up now. It is not a future anyone I know would want to live.

Watched it myself it was amazing. Hard to believe it was written a decade or so ago; it's like the author predicted the future.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on October 09, 2017, 11:13:24 pm
I forgot my makeup bag at the facility I was working at tonight.  It has all my makeup, except my lipstick and a couple different nail polishes. :'( :'( :'( :'(  I think that is where I left my MP3 player as well.  :'(

To make matters worse, it's a two and a half hour drive to get it from home. >:(  I'm going to not have makeup until Friday! >:( :'(


Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on October 10, 2017, 01:28:37 pm
When I got up to get a drink of water around 2 am like I often do during the night, my right foot began dribbling blood up near my ankle  :o

So as if that wasn't freaky enough, while I was tending to that one my left foot began spraying blood in spurts like a paint can
 :o

I decided to call the medics but managed to stop the bleeding before they arrived  :-\  So there's the two medics and a police man and they looked just as confused as I felt trying to explain it but they could see the blood all over my kitchen floor

They offered to take me to hospital but since the bleeding had stopped I just want to go back to bed

So while I talked to the police man and the one medic that I somewhat fancy a bit the other medic helped with cleaning up the blood off the floor

Then since I didn't want to go to the hospital they all took off and I went back to bed (In hopes that the bleeding wouldn't start up again)  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on October 11, 2017, 05:29:37 pm
Sounds like the time I nicked a vein on the shower door. Hope you're OK
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on October 11, 2017, 06:48:04 pm
I'll be okay, been putting moisturizing lotion

Definitely don't want to become a hemophiliac or an amputy 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on October 14, 2017, 03:52:06 pm
Today I realized how empty my life really is. I have nothing really but my job and what's left of my marriage. We cling to each other for comfort of a sort, but I'm no longer what she needs and she's not comfortable being what I need. No close friends, very little time for them anyway.

I have no one to blame for this but myself.

That's about all the truth I can tolerate for a while.

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on October 16, 2017, 05:10:59 pm
Darn PTSD effecting my sleeping and eating habits again  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on October 24, 2017, 03:50:17 pm
When I’m feeling bad, why do I have to physically reflect that on myself?

*Wishing there was a gated support area for us that self harm*


Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on October 24, 2017, 05:19:09 pm
Let's see. Got pulled over on the way to a client cause the cop was bored at a light and evidently someone thought it would be a laugh to pull a ticket off my windshield six months ago.

Weather was inducing seizures in my client for the five hours I was with her.

Another client pulled two knives on his overnight staff at 1:00 in the morning because he was out of cigarettes. The police brought him to the hospital for evaluation but he's already been released. I see him Monday.

Another client is still out of town. He was supposed to be back yesterday. No word if he'll never back for our session on Thursday. With the one on Friday who scheduled off to meet with his lawyers and the one who cancelled yesterday I'm missing half my hours this week. I don't get paid for the missing hours.

Someone is trying to throw me under the bus because a mutual client's electricity almost got cut off. The amount she owed is so much it could only be if the county wasn't paying their share.

And, I have a splitting headache, probably from all the above.

On the plus side, my posts on this thread are almost never about trans stuff anymore and the cop called me ma'am.

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on October 31, 2017, 12:49:09 pm
I had to stop estradiol a month before my surgery.   A month of PMS, and the hormonal bits of dysphoria!  Auugh!  Now I’m back on, at half strength, apparently the traditional treatment for post-ops from what I can tell.  But...

I shrunk from a 34Barely to 34Almost, darn near 34AA, AKA ironing board.   

Auuugh! Bra shopping in the pre-teens aisle?  Auuuugh!


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on October 31, 2017, 06:50:52 pm
A litter bin overflowing aith spew, another one containing shitty condoms, a pissed on matress.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on October 31, 2017, 07:41:51 pm
After my makeover yesterday. My dysphoria has basically disappeared, which has been making me question whether I'm just a crossdresser or if I'm really trans. Although I felt like myself for the first time ever, while I was dressed, and I've still been getting moments where my urge to be a woman is strong.

I expect my dysphoria to return at some point, honestly, at this point, I'd be disappointed if I wasn't trans, does that even make any sense?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 02, 2017, 12:09:24 am
Seem to have come down with some sort of cold or something  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 02, 2017, 04:47:54 pm
Twisted my ankle  :-\  I'm hoping it's not too bad but I can feel that weird tingly pain and swelling
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on November 03, 2017, 01:58:29 pm
My dysphoria has returned, and is near crippling. Work makes it bad, because I'm my department, it's all males, so we're all 'lads'. I get on them really well, but being around them makes me hate myself even more.

When my dysphoria gets this bad, I feel like I'm going to burst unless I tell everyone I'm transgender, even though I know I'm not ready for that yet. I actually wish I could cry, but I feel that numb
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 03, 2017, 08:24:47 pm
Therapist appointment, depressed the stuff out of me
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on November 03, 2017, 08:26:43 pm
My living situation and the cost
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on November 04, 2017, 02:26:04 am
Cystitis
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on November 04, 2017, 04:57:36 am
I returned home after a trip abroad for a month and a half and had a laser session on my beard. It was really painful and my skin on my face looks a bit battered. Anyways I couldn’t leave the house and felt lonely and started thinking about my ex.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on November 04, 2017, 08:51:09 am
I lost a friend yesterday.  Not because of being trans, but because I am just terrible at friendship. I hurt someone deeply.  This morning when I looked in the mirror all I can see is that same asshole I've seen for 36 years staring back at me.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 04, 2017, 11:33:54 am
I lost a friend yesterday.  Not because of being trans, but because I am just terrible at friendship. I hurt someone deeply.  This morning when I looked in the mirror all I can see is that same asshole I've seen for 36 years staring back at me.

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Mistakes get made, it's a reality of life, maybe your friendship can recover?
But either way,  the fact you care about the loss says you're not that person you think is in the mirror. X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on November 04, 2017, 01:01:29 pm
My football team, Aston Villa lost today :( (I’m a massive english football fan)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on November 04, 2017, 01:18:24 pm
Mistakes get made, it's a reality of life, maybe your friendship can recover?
But either way,  the fact you care about the loss says you're not that person you think is in the mirror. X

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Thank you for the kindness.  I find it extremely unlikely.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on November 04, 2017, 05:45:53 pm
Peroneal brevis tendinitis


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on November 04, 2017, 06:39:47 pm
I was planning to go out and tried to do my makeup but failed miserably. So now I'm under the covers and staying in. I'm okay with it but the reminder earlier was tough


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on November 04, 2017, 07:06:25 pm
I was planning to go out and tried to do my makeup but failed miserably. So now I'm under the covers and staying in. I'm okay with it but the reminder earlier was tough


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At least you tried, don't get too disheartened, you'll get it eventually :). If it makes you feel better, I'm terribly at make-up too ::)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Selene on November 05, 2017, 05:15:47 am
I tend to be on the periphery of life.

A better explanation for that would be I'm standoffish :)

I've always been the type to go off, and do my own thing. Perhaps I need to work harder to find friends, but its not easy living in the mountains. Sometimes I crave human interaction. Call me weird, but time to time I'll go to public places. The mall, if I'm in the city, or any nearby park. I'm an observer of people -not in a creepy way. I don't know, somehow I feel connected in a way hard to describe.

What made me sad today.

I was at my favorite park. It's in Post Falls, here in Idaho. I love that place, I soak up as much time as I can there, even if its snowing. My usual ritual is to bring some coffee, sit under the willow tree, and just zone into my surroundings. I didn't expect anyone to be there with me. I made my way to my favorite spot, and I saw a figure across from me sitting at the bench next to the little duck pond. An older gentleman, just sitting like I often do.

Privacy is something I respect, but I could tell the man was wiping away tears. I couldn't help but glance, and wonder. I wanted to give him a hug, as odd/awkward as that might have been. I turned my attention away for a few minutes. Going over internally my own feelings. Halfway through my coffee, I looked back where the old man had been sitting, but had gone.

The park was so quiet, or it seemed that way. I felt very alone. I was sad that I could have at least given him a smile, and missed that opportunity. I think he need that snowy park bench, and I left it at that. Still, it made me sad.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on November 05, 2017, 06:09:23 am
At least you tried, don't get too disheartened, you'll get it eventually :). If it makes you feel better, I'm terribly at make-up too ::)

Thanks for your kind words! We'll get there but I also just want ffs so I don't have to be so insecure about it


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on November 06, 2017, 06:25:35 am
This was actually yesterday. side comments got to me.  I was happily wearing slacks and a nice blouse, the wife liked the look. We went to the store to grab something on the way to my daughters house. Now, likely I shouldn't have but I let slip that I would like to try so simple lip gloss, nothing dramatic. The first words out of her mouth?  "Oh, jeez". Sure she quickly changed 'how' she was saying things but the those first unguarded words really hurt. If she had simply said that 'she's' not ready for that I would have been fine.

second one
At my daughters, older granddaughter treated me no different. younger one sat next to me and snuggled in for quite a while when she asked why I was wearing 'it' pointing at my blouse. I kept is simple (she's 5) .. because I liked it. We discussed favorite colors, she agreed she liked the shirt and that was it. This was actually very nice.

third one
(outside my hearing, heard later) son-in-law saw me and went 'oh my god'. My daughter told him to keep his mouth shut and to go outside. Not sure how to take that. Is she OK with it but knew he'd say something stupid (which he does about most things)? Is she just avoiding it by not acknowledging?

in any case, I was really down last night, still am today.  I think I'm going to back off a bit on everything to let the world settle down.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on November 06, 2017, 07:45:19 am
This was actually yesterday. side comments got to me.  I was happily wearing slacks and a nice blouse, the wife liked the look. We went to the store to grab something on the way to my daughters house. Now, likely I shouldn't have but I let slip that I would like to try so simple lip gloss, nothing dramatic. The first words out of her mouth?  "Oh, jeez". Sure she quickly changed 'how' she was saying things but the those first unguarded words really hurt. If she had simply said that 'she's' not ready for that I would have been fine.

Hi Namelessone

I can relate to what you have said. I can remember my wife having issues with some things but in the end with patience she overcame each obstacle. Sometimes it is difficult for our partners when we move to another stage in out journey and want to try something more. You may have said lip gloss but she may have "heard" full makeup and reacted accordingly then realised that you were just talking lip gloss. I know with my partner there have been similar incidences and in my experience talking about these things works out far better than trying to work out what she is thinking on your own.

Quote
second one
At my daughters, older granddaughter treated me no different. younger one sat next to me and snuggled in for quite a while when she asked why I was wearing 'it' pointing at my blouse. I kept is simple (she's 5) .. because I liked it. We discussed favorite colors, she agreed she liked the shirt and that was it. This was actually very nice.

Perfectly handled...because you "liked it" is a really good answer for a five year old. I think you handled it perfectly

Quote
third one
(outside my hearing, heard later) son-in-law saw me and went 'oh my god'. My daughter told him to keep his mouth shut and to go outside. Not sure how to take that. Is she OK with it but knew he'd say something stupid (which he does about most things)? Is she just avoiding it by not acknowledging?

in any case, I was really down last night, still am today.  I think I'm going to back off a bit on everything to let the world settle down.

She sounds like she was being protective of you. She did not want you hurt by hearing the decidedly tactless comment made by your son-in-law. As to wether she is Ok with things why don't you sit down, talk to her and ask.

I hope you are feeling better today and if you need to slow things down then do that. You need to be comfortable with where you are and where your family is at.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on November 06, 2017, 11:33:55 am
protective, I hope so. I have a big fear of being tolerated rather than accepted. I think I'd rather be disliked than tolerated.

I've been thinking of things that I'm doing. I've done a lot in a short time. I really need to slow down like I knew I had to from the start ... it's just hard once you get momentum. .... Deep Breaths ....
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on November 06, 2017, 04:29:57 pm
My wife telling me she doesn’t know if she can handle IT.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on November 10, 2017, 11:02:54 am
My dad still acting uncomfortable about my sexuality. I've made a few hints over the years but he'd rather not know. If I date a girl he'll see that as gay and be uncomfortable by it; if I date a man he'll see that as gay and be uncomfortable by it. There's no winning. I'm never going to have the parent who makes gay puns and light hearted jokes about a current partner of mine and treating them like a part of the family; the kind of thing the media portrays as accepting parents. I'll always have to keep that part of my life a secret. It's like I'm living a life of a queer person from the 80's
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Angela Drakken on November 10, 2017, 12:52:34 pm
Human Resources texting and emailing me saying they want to 'check up' on me when I have a laundry list of complaints I'd like to mention and a pile of work to get done, and yet at the same time I don't wanna be THAT GIRL who screams the sky is falling every few days..

So I do nothing.

When I go home tonight, its to an apartment that really doesnt feel like my own anymore due to infestation of roaches and most recently bed bugs that my landlord and regional rental office AND public health department have no interest in resolving for me..


Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on November 10, 2017, 01:15:35 pm
Human Resources texting and emailing me saying they want to 'check up' on me when I have a laundry list of complaints I'd like to mention and a pile of work to get done, and yet at the same time I don't wanna be THAT GIRL who screams the sky is falling every few days..

So I do nothing.

When I go home tonight, its to an apartment that really doesnt feel like my own anymore due to infestation of roaches and most recently bed bugs that my landlord and regional rental office AND public health department have no interest in resolving for me..
Roaches AND bedbugs? Wow! Roaches are one of the few things that EAT bedbugs.

(Also ants, spiders, and centipedes.)

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on November 10, 2017, 02:28:41 pm
Tried to update my avatar and managed to lose the old one GRRRRRRRR and cant get a ticker to add , no instructions for computer numpty Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr again
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on November 10, 2017, 03:30:56 pm
Today my spouse posted one of those "how come a woman on her day off does cleaning, etc. and a man wants to relax". She went on to describe all the cleaning she did on the first day of her three day weekend that, of course, she had no help with.

My thought is that a) I'm NOT a man, b) I'm working today, c) we do do this kind of stuff together on Sunday. If I bring this up it will start an argument so I'm crying on your shoulder rather than discussing this with her.

I think it hurts most that she's implying I'm still a man. She also doesn't see what I do, just what she wants done I couldn't get to.

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: sarah1972 on November 10, 2017, 04:20:59 pm
Being me.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 10, 2017, 04:22:56 pm
Being me.
Oh no,  what's up hon? Have a big *hug*. X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: upcummingattractions on November 11, 2017, 05:12:05 am
Cold coffee. Yuck. And not knowing which of my story ideas to work on.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on November 11, 2017, 06:03:51 am
I keep having these flashes, as if they're memories, of (what has to be) me slouched over bawling my eyes out. It's like someone inside of me is trapped and it's sad :( I never had this happen in my life..
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on November 11, 2017, 08:51:34 am
I keep having these flashes, as if they're memories, of (what has to be) me slouched over bawling my eyes out. It's like someone inside of me is trapped and it's sad :( I never had this happen in my life..

I'm so sorry for you that you feel that. I know exactly what you're talking about though :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on November 11, 2017, 07:12:47 pm
Wondering if I'll ever intrinsically see myself as the woman everyone else seems to accept me as.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 11, 2017, 07:37:46 pm
A friend of mine said he would take me to the store today but then changed his mind and decided to go spend the night at his parents  ::)  Too bad because I was actually starting to like him

The way I was raised, if you gave your word you kept it

Oh well I guess, luckily another one of my neighbors who understands my physical limitations stepped up and gave me a ride so it all worked out okay

Just feeling a bit off by the friend who let me down

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on November 11, 2017, 07:45:59 pm
Wondering if I'll ever intrinsically see myself as the woman everyone else seems to accept me as.

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I wondered that, too. Eventually, I started to.

:

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!

Think outside the voice box!

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on November 12, 2017, 04:14:27 am
My homework from my therapy, which is a thought catalog of things that make me anxious, which in itself makes me anxious...

Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Meghan on November 12, 2017, 05:54:34 am
My homework from my therapy, which is a thought catalog of things that make me anxious, which in itself makes me anxious...

Rowan
Only after two sessions my Therapist diagnose me as Transgender, because whenever I talk about Transgender or wearing woman clothes I seem at ease and happy. She also said since I been suppress my Transgender for so long make me so miserable all the time.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: mac1 on November 14, 2017, 07:33:43 pm
Seeing that thing between my legs - Wrong one.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: EvaMarie on November 14, 2017, 09:40:54 pm
Eating disorder... I just see a fat disgusting man when I look at myself. I haven't eaten since Sunday afternoon...Probably wont be able to eat tomorrow either.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on November 15, 2017, 06:42:12 am
last night ... went for the nightly walk with the wife. I wore comfy tights and shorts (it's getting colder) and shoes. Pink/purplish low-rise socks to go with the shoes. All good, felt great.  She was texting her sister and shot her a picture of me from the waist down. Plus side, they both thought it looked great (and sis-in-law didn't know it was me) But, she also took some full body pics.

yuch comes to mind. I looked horribly bad. I deleted what I could before she took the phone away from me. I was depressed the rest of the evening. Sure, I still have 100% man shape, no question, so expectations should be low. Doesn't matter, I hated it. Just typing this makes it all come back .. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on November 15, 2017, 04:33:23 pm
My older daughters not getting along


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on November 15, 2017, 04:47:36 pm
I phoned a transgender helpline this evening, to get some direction, to know what to do next (I’m 90% sure I’m trans, but want to be 100% sure before coming out/living female). I was first told that people who are transgender begin to think they are from a younger age, then when I explained my situation fully, I sound transgender and that I should come out to my mom and tell my workplace (both of which I’m not even going to consider until I am 100% sure).

So I’m even more confused now, and a little insulted, I’ve never had my ‘transness’ questioned... I really need some therapy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 15, 2017, 05:13:58 pm
Which helpline was this?  it sounds like some very oversimplified or ill-informed advice to hand out after a single phone call.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 15, 2017, 05:18:38 pm
For me it was about building confidence,  though you can never be 100% sure.

One thing you could try is a weekend away. I did this to have a longer period presenting as Megan. I had a weekend city break in Manchester (where I know no one). I then went on a three night residential Mindfulness retreat with 12 other women to really feel that dynamic.

Both of these help me decide that full-time was going to be right for me.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on November 15, 2017, 05:28:43 pm
I'm one of 3 survivors from my old crew of 7. 2 to cancer, 1 O/D, 1 killed in a deal gone bad
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Meghan on November 15, 2017, 06:33:42 pm
For me it was about building confidence,  though you can never be 100% sure.

One thing you could try is a weekend away. I did this to have a longer period presenting as Megan. I had a weekend city break in Manchester (where I know no one). I then went on a three night residential Mindfulness retreat with 12 other women to really feel that dynamic.

Both of these help me decide that full-time was going to be right for me.

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I was sure about my transgender until I talk to my Therapist and sure enough I am a transgender. She said when ever I talk about Transgender or wearing woman clothes I look happy to talk about it. So since this is who I am I should do something so I can be happy, otherwise I will miserable for the rest of my life. That why I made the decision to transition without any regret at all.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on November 16, 2017, 01:53:28 am
Which helpline was this?  it sounds like some very oversimplified or ill-informed advice to hand out after a single phone call.

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It was called Transfigurations, Devon based. You look absolutely stunning by the way Megan :)

For me it was about building confidence,  though you can never be 100% sure.

One thing you could try is a weekend away. I did this to have a longer period presenting as Megan. I had a weekend city break in Manchester (where I know no one). I then went on a three night residential Mindfulness retreat with 12 other women to really feel that dynamic.

Both of these help me decide that full-time was going to be right for me.

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You might be onto something there Megan, a weekend away being completely en femme really excites me, I think I’d survive, as long as I didn’t have to speak, ha
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: sarah1972 on November 16, 2017, 05:55:40 pm
Usually around this time of the year I spent hours outside to decorate my house for christmas. Yeah, I am one of those. With music and over 50,000 blinking lights.
This year I just cannot find the time.
So I told my audience we will take a break this year, It was so difficult to do since I know how much they all love the show, we literally have several 1000 people come by every year.

Was a really sad moment when I hit the "post" button.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 17, 2017, 12:18:48 am
All those lucky people you've brought magic to over the years. Now it's someone elses turn to carry the load,  you've certainly earned a break! X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 17, 2017, 08:11:38 pm
Woke up around 2 AM with a bad tummy, not sure what time I finally got back to bed but slept most of the day away

Now I'm just moping about feeling like warmed over death  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on November 17, 2017, 09:51:09 pm
  I hope it's just that you are tired. I also hope your tummy feels better. If it is of any comfort V.M. I had a very broken and fitful sleep last night myself. They say misery loves company, recruit a friend to come over and visit.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on November 17, 2017, 10:31:50 pm
Thank you Laurie, if only it were that easy

Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on November 18, 2017, 05:15:20 pm
I'm sick, I hate myself, and I've decided that I can't be friends anymore with someone.  Also, stuck at work. My house is a trainwreck that needs to get cleaned before we host in Thursday but I have zero motivation to do a damn thing.  Good times.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on November 18, 2017, 05:25:25 pm
  I hope it gets better for you quickly Amber. That house won't get cleaned up by itself.

Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on November 18, 2017, 05:33:21 pm
  I hope it gets better for you quickly Amber. That house won't get cleaned up by itself.

Hugs,
   Laurie
Thanks Laurie. I'm on medicine for the cold.  Time will help me feel better about myself.  In the interim I will likely have to rely on my wife for cleaning.  For which I will apologize profusely after I start to feel better. I just hope it passes by the holiday.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jamie Xu on November 19, 2017, 03:40:32 am
My mum was telling me about some cheap microwaves that no one likes because they have big buttons. I said "who cares about the buttons" she said "women cares" ouch:(.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on November 19, 2017, 04:18:01 am
Being told that the response I had when I caught the home invader was ‘me’ and that wasnt a normal girl response, and that I should be proud. And yet the person telling me what I should feel and think couldn’t grasp why I was/am horrified by my actions.

Thoroughly disgusted with myself.

Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 19, 2017, 04:30:02 am
Being told that the response I had when I caught the home invader was ‘me’ and that wasnt a normal girl response, and that I should be proud. And yet the person telling me what I should feel and think couldn’t grasp why I was/am horrified by my actions.

Thoroughly disgusted with myself.

Rowan
Anybody comes into my home,  I might let them live to regret it, if I'm in good mood.
I'm a proud, strong, confident woman; I don't need to cower in a corner to feel feminine. Own it hun,  be true to who you are. X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on November 19, 2017, 01:19:42 pm
If I catch an intruder they're injuries will be life changing should they survive. No rules, I will fight dirty & mean.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on November 21, 2017, 08:27:29 pm
We had to say goodbye to our old kitty today.  He was an interesting cat with a huge personality and a voice like Pavarotti.  Okay, maybe he couldn't sing in tune, but he could match Pavarotti in volume!  But he was 20 and in declining health, needing surgery that he probably couldn't have tolerated.  I miss having to step over him.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 21, 2017, 08:37:56 pm
We had to say goodbye to our old kitty today.  He was an interesting cat with a huge personality and a voice like Pavarotti.  Okay, maybe he couldn't sing in tune, but he could match Pavarotti in volume!  But he was 20 and in declining health, needing surgery that he probably couldn't have tolerated.  I miss having to step over him.
Sorry to hear that Kathy,  I'm a big moggie fan.  Have a hug from me. X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on November 21, 2017, 11:58:11 pm
We had to say goodbye to our old kitty today.  He was an interesting cat with a huge personality and a voice like Pavarotti.  Okay, maybe he couldn't sing in tune, but he could match Pavarotti in volume!  But he was 20 and in declining health, needing surgery that he probably couldn't have tolerated.  I miss having to step over him.

Kathy, I’m so sorry about your little buddy. I love all animals, but my dog is my only child. I started training her tonight about getting treats from “her other mom.” Our Maggie is 14 now, and still in pretty good shape except for her hearing, but I know that day is coming some time in the future.

So I grieve with you.

Steph
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on November 22, 2017, 08:10:32 am
For a second I imagined everyone at work referred to me by ‘Sinead’ and it made me happy. In reality, I’m in a male body, and everyone refers to me as Sean :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on November 23, 2017, 03:22:51 pm
I wasn't allowed to go to thanksgiving dinner as Claire.  Even when I went, most of my family ignored me, and one stared daggers at me most of the time.  It was painful.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: jaybutterfly on November 23, 2017, 05:51:16 pm
I've been miserable for weeks.

I had a job interview for a new position at work, and I was refused the position for very odd reasons.

1. I have a brother who works here, they dont think I can delegate tasks to him as a supervisor. Thing is, my brother only teaches classes at the leisure centre and doesnt do operations like banking etc. Which is what the supervisors do. I wouldnt even cross path with him, let alone need to delegate.

2. They want to expand the responsibilities of a supervisor. They did not clarify what these were. The guy they took on instead take an hour to fill out a form, has had two stand up arguements with members for his rudeness and can't even learn to use a computer (Ive had to train him for the position, and i was a rejected candidate) hell, speaking of responsibilities, he doesnt join in on any of the shared duties like cleaning, cashing up etc. I feel humiliated just having to work with him.

This has all hurt my confidence, because I feel my employers dont trust me to do a good job, despite the fact I routinely fill in for others, stay late, show up early, skip breaks or take shorter breaks, do extra (I loaded up my car with their trash to save them money on bin collection, I worked six weeks with a broken arm from the day it was in cast with one arm, just to help the centre when we were down a member). Feels like Im taken for granted.


I've gotten to the point where I need to talk to them because it's driving me insane and making me miserable.

Theyve cut my hours as well because of the new supervisor and now I barely make £400 before tax, I cant live like this.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on November 24, 2017, 05:15:24 am
Trying to come to terms with how badly broken I am.

Not feeling bad (yay, thanks medication!), just trying to come to terms with the wreckage, and waiting, to find out what this weeks description may be.

Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on November 24, 2017, 05:37:44 am
Some random guy pointed towards me and started laughing with his friend. It was so very awkward because I obviously noticed they were looking right at me. Thankfully they moved away

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 24, 2017, 06:16:32 am
My Ex doesn't want me seeing my daughter in her preschool nativity.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: sarah1972 on November 24, 2017, 06:40:13 am
My Ex doesn't want me seeing my daughter in her preschool nativity.

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Oh no. So sorry, did she give any good reason?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 24, 2017, 06:44:06 am
I've never been allowed on or near my children's schools since transitioning.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on November 24, 2017, 07:25:50 am
Wondering what happened to an ex & finding she died last year at only 58
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on November 24, 2017, 07:26:51 am
I've never been allowed on or near my children's schools since transitioning.

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That's wrong, It's 2017
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on November 24, 2017, 08:30:17 am
I've never been allowed on or near my children's schools since transitioning.

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That’s really sad to hear, surely she can’t stop you though. Kisses and hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on November 24, 2017, 08:31:33 am
Cut off by family, living alone, sleeping alone.

I hate the “holiday season”.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 24, 2017, 08:37:22 am
Cut off by family, living alone, sleeping alone.

I hate the “holiday season”.


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Come to mine for Christmas,  we can be alone together

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bobbi Anne on November 24, 2017, 10:27:14 am
What made me unhappy today was the fact I had just realized it has been 3 years since I have been last able to dress as Bobbi Anne. I miss it so much, but my wife hates it and has 'forbid' me from dressing if we want to keep our marriage together. Just feeling down at seeing all the pretty clothes on sale that I would love to wear.(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20171124/b6e639864a0b4e83c287419cc38d6388.jpg)(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20171124/964c70859b3597da81b93ee17a9926df.jpg)(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20171124/8d63b79e6795242161f6939147438e72.jpg)

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on November 26, 2017, 06:30:53 am
Does anyone else (I’m in the closet btw) get those days where they just can’t be around people because seeing everyone in your desired gender is just making you feel really jealous and dysphoric? Wondered if it was just me
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on November 26, 2017, 06:58:41 am
A regular guest hadn't been visiting us. I saw on her facebook page she started cancer treatment last summer. There are no further entries since, it doesn't look good
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 26, 2017, 11:19:31 am
Does anyone else (I’m in the closet btw) get those days where they just can’t be around people because seeing everyone in your desired gender is just making you feel really jealous and dysphoric? Wondered if it was just me
Not just you hun, I still remember those days well,  not fun . I'm sorry you're in that place. X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on November 26, 2017, 11:59:12 am
A regular guest hadn't been visiting us. I saw on her facebook page she started cancer treatment last summer. There are no further entries since, it doesn't look good

  That makes me unhappy also Kim  not even knowing of whom you speak. Cancer is a devastating disease.
Title: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on November 26, 2017, 12:31:31 pm
Does anyone else (I’m in the closet btw) get those days where they just can’t be around people because seeing everyone in your desired gender is just making you feel really jealous and dysphoric? Wondered if it was just me

Absolutely, Sinead! Only three months ago my wife and I went to one of the huge communities here in Florida that have activities going in the square every night. As we were having dinner I watched women walking around outside in their pretty sundresses and colorful shorts and clothes, just enjoying themselves, and the thought that I’d never ever be able to experience that overwhelmed me, and I had a huge meltdown.

But you know what? It really does get better. I’ve now gone full-time, and last Tuesday my wife and I went to that same community, took part in a trivia contest, ate dinner, and walked around the square enjoying the music and visiting the vendors, all with me in my new role. It was awesome!

So don’t let it get to you too much. Believe me, you can do it, too.

Stephanie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on November 26, 2017, 01:44:15 pm
Not being loved for who I really am


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on November 27, 2017, 07:44:17 am
Cried because of my ex. Again. I want to be with him and he doesn't reject me but doesn't take me back either. We're both in limbo and I'm tired of feeling sad.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on November 27, 2017, 05:07:00 pm
My low self esteem i feel like it gets in the way of everything for me. Today it's been at a high where im presenting "male" at work. I don't remember it being this uncomfortable before

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on November 27, 2017, 07:13:54 pm
We're both in limbo and I'm tired of feeling sad.

Same.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Angela Drakken on November 28, 2017, 10:40:25 am
When you do something nice for a stranger and they respond with; 'Nice! You're the MAN!' So you respond politely with; 'I'm not a man..' So they upgrade to; 'Thank you sir!' In the same exchange..

Lesson learned; heck with everybody. I'm done helping idiots.




*Language Please*


Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 30, 2017, 07:57:17 am
My job requires me to create 4 minute information videos that get distributed out across my company (tens of thousands) every 3-4 weeks.

It's never fun having to record and edit myself mid-transition with a still very poor voice.

Not nice knowing there will be an indelible record of my transition floating around for years to come .



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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: sarah1972 on November 30, 2017, 08:10:51 am
So sorry Megan. I feel with you on this topic.

Might be an odd suggestion but have you looked around, there is software which can change the pitch of your voice into a more female range? Would be a bit more editing work but the results are interesting (as long as you don't crank it up to 11, then you would sound like Mini Mouse). There may even be software you can just run inline while recording, so you could save some work.

You could even re-edit some of the older videos and adjust the pitch ;-)


My job requires me to create 4 minute information videos that get distributed out across my company (tens of thousands) every 3-4 weeks.

It's never fun having to record and edit myself mid-transition with a still very poor voice.

Not nice knowing there will be an indelible record of my transition floating around for years to come .



Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on November 30, 2017, 08:58:02 am
Sarah,  that's a good idea, if only I wasn't too lazy to bother .
The fact is that,  I should be doing more practice,  and that I'm proud of who and what I am, and I won't hide that.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on November 30, 2017, 09:27:17 am
Sarah,  that's a good idea, if only I wasn't too lazy to bother .
The fact is that,  I should be doing more practice,  and that I'm proud of who and what I am, and I won't hide that.

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

this :)

I've been dressing more to my liking even at work without 'outing'. If they think something is odd, so be it, I don't care. I am me.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: DawnOday on November 30, 2017, 09:36:10 am
Another torturous session of hair removal. About 10 more to go.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: sarah1972 on November 30, 2017, 11:33:28 am
 Hahaha... that would be so me, I am right there with you (on both points btw)

Sarah,  that's a good idea, if only I wasn't too lazy to bother .
The fact is that,  I should be doing more practice,  and that I'm proud of who and what I am, and I won't hide that.

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: aves on November 30, 2017, 12:11:08 pm
I'm just now realizing that one of the final papers I am going to write is about male privilege and hegemonic masculinity- a topic I am good at discussing in one of my sociology classes, but not in my English classes. It's going to be hard to actually get this professor to listen to what I have to say about this topic because she is very much the white cis older woman that doesn't understand the gender spectrum and that privilege is actually a thing.

This paper is going to drain me so much.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on December 03, 2017, 03:19:11 pm
So I went out of town last night with some friends to see a concert. After the concert we got really lost on the way back to our hotel, we ended up 15 miles away from it because New Jersey is really confusing and there are no easy spots to turn around! I came really close to driving into a lane of oncoming traffic! It really stressed me out, I'm never that bad at driving! Then we got back to the hotel and I couldn't sleep. My friends stayed up for a bit, so that was part of it, then when they went to sleep 2 of them were snoring. I got maybe 2 hours of sleep last night.

a couple weeks ago I posted some stuff in my HRT thread about how I was depressed because my friends were always doing stuff and excluding me from it and it happened again last night, they were posting videos of what looked like a really fun party and they did cute stuff like make gingerbread houses. I've been trying forever to do cute little craft nights with them and even tried to set some up and they always claimed they were too busy. they say it's unintentional but sometimes it really feels like it is.

I was supposed to have band practice today too but then our drummer decided that the time I told him to plan on wasn't going to work for him and then our bassist couldn't practice earlier so that got all messed up too.

sorry, I needed to vent.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: brandyvgs on December 03, 2017, 08:14:54 pm
Today, I was seeing a post of a pictures from last weekend's car meet that finally got posted and I seen myself and seeing myself still in the guy mode and still looking big as I still do still puts me in the mode of sadness.

I have always hated how the guy version of me looked fat or not I just don't like that version of me.

Even though I have been seeing some changes in the mirror from being on HRT for almost a year now, and how much weight I have lost in the past 6 months I am still unhappy about how I look and seems to be that thing.

At this same time I was just thinking about how the other day I have this permanent angry look even tho my mood is great and I have been happy these past few days, I still have this unapproachable look in which I don't know how to fix, I feel like this was something since the cancer back in 2003 that caused ability to unable to show a decent smile and the cost to repair that is too much to even afford this day and age.

And my weight loss went from 293 in May till Now still around 227ish.

I guess this is all hitting me today as I know, in time with patience I will achieve my goals, it is just sad to think about the road to success sometimes but keeping an outlook to the dream that can be achieved.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: EvaMarie on December 03, 2017, 10:38:29 pm
I'm just now realizing that one of the final papers I am going to write is about male privilege and hegemonic masculinity- a topic I am good at discussing in one of my sociology classes, but not in my English classes. It's going to be hard to actually get this professor to listen to what I have to say about this topic because she is very much the white cis older woman that doesn't understand the gender spectrum and that privilege is actually a thing.

This paper is going to drain me so much.

I'm sorry that you feel like your voice isn't heard.

Think of it this way though, It's not fun to debate with people who agree with you. In a sociology class everyone is most likely on the same page, or at least willing to listen. It's only how well we articulate ourselves with the general public or someone that opposes us that shows us how much we know about a particular topic. This is a great opportunity to test your knowledge and perhaps expand on it even more.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on December 04, 2017, 02:58:31 pm
Went to my trans group today, I actually didn’t enjoy it. I loved being able to dress up and be myself, but I didn’t enjoy wearing my wig. I wanted to take it off as soon as I could, it got in the way of my eyes and felt uncomfortable, I wish I had naturally long hair, also, everyone there was further on in their transition than me (I haven’t even started yet), especially this one girl who looked perfect, I was so jealous of her, she looked so pretty and passable, I would’ve done anything to swap bodies with her. Didn’t enjoy changing back into a ‘male’, never do really
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on December 05, 2017, 08:23:23 pm
I found out that my new girlfriend was raped.  As to whether or not that is unhappy or just plain ticked is up for debate.  She couldn't admit it to herself, let alone me, for a while.  She was blaming herself for the event.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on December 05, 2017, 08:30:04 pm
Hi Artesia,

(Hugs), it’s always horrid when we find out things like this.

My unhappiness today is from the discovery of the term emotional incest, and then on reading discovered that it described my relationship with my mother.

Exactly. Scarily so.

Why do I have to be so broken.?

*numb and nauseous*

Rowan.

Ps. Apparently it’s common for EI survivors to have significant gender issues, well go figure.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on December 06, 2017, 04:32:34 am
*Heavy sigh*

Coping during the Holiday season, putting on a smile front and trying to pretend that everything is hunky dory when I know that it isn't and hoping I'll even make it through the month  :-\   The anxiety and depression is killing me but I'm sure I'm not the only one though
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on December 06, 2017, 04:35:37 am
*Heavy sigh*

Coping during the Holiday season, putting on a smile front and trying to pretend that everything is hunky dory when I know that it isn't and hoping I'll even make it through the month  :-\  I'm sure I'm not the only though
Hugs hun. X

Take the chance to enjoy the 'you' time,  a little pampering never hurts.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on December 06, 2017, 04:53:16 am
*Sigh*

If only it were that simple, but I spend too much time alone already

Thanks for your thoughts though

Hugs back
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on December 06, 2017, 01:35:57 pm
*Heavy sigh*

Coping during the Holiday season, putting on a smile front and trying to pretend that everything is hunky dory when I know that it isn't and hoping I'll even make it through the month  :-\   The anxiety and depression is killing me but I'm sure I'm not the only one though

I'm sorry for that! Just keep in mind that this is a roller coaster so the depression will pass. If you can go out with your friends and get distracted.

Hugs!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on December 07, 2017, 08:58:38 pm
I had one of those days that made me feel old and dumb today.  I'm an overachiever, to the extreme.  I sat in on a demonstration today from some kids about 20 years younger than me.  They were doing something technology wise that was really impressive.  It made me feel like tech has passed me.  My tech resume is long too, but damn, these young kids!

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: DeniseGrace on December 07, 2017, 09:02:57 pm
109 percent increase in my 2018 monthly insurance premium. Higher deductibles. Higher co-pays. Less covered services.

Thanks so much politicians.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on December 08, 2017, 12:54:28 am
109 percent increase in my 2018 monthly insurance premium. Higher deductibles. Higher co-pays. Less covered services.

Thanks so much politicians.

 Hi DeniseGrace,

  I'm Laurie and it appears that you have somehow slipped past our greeting detectors. So please let me say, Welcome To Susan's Place! Come on in and take a good look around.  Perhaps I can even get you to hop on over to the Introductions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,8.0.html) Thread and  create a post to tell us a little bit more about yourself so we can get to know you a little better and greet you properly. I'll add some links and information below that can help you get more out of our site. Please take time to become familiar with them especially the RED one as we are always getting questions that are answered there.
Laurie
Global Moderator
Laurie@susans.org

Things that you should read
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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ryuichi13 on December 08, 2017, 02:43:52 pm
Went to my endo's appointment line I should, and the office was closed!  No note on the door, no phone call, building lights turned off and everything!  WTH?

But I did notice after I realized the office was locked that the outside sign looks like it had been blown off the pole.  I hope everything's okay.

Ryuichi

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on December 08, 2017, 04:07:25 pm
Went to pick up my new HRT prescription and it wont be in till MONDAY **^^^!!!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on December 10, 2017, 04:00:11 pm
I'm totally broke and have come down with a nasty cold  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on December 17, 2017, 08:40:36 pm
My dog has been sick, and blood tests show liver failure.  I don't know the cause yet, crying lots.  He is my best friend, my favorite, sometimes only friend. I keep thinking the worst.  Mire tests tomorrow.

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on December 17, 2017, 09:04:41 pm
I'm so sorry. I've lost a few best friends over the years. It doesn't get easier. I hope for your sake, and his, that the cause is found quickly and corrected.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on December 17, 2017, 10:35:50 pm
My dog has been sick, and blood tests show liver failure.  I don't know the cause yet, crying lots.  He is my best friend, my favorite, sometimes only friend. I keep thinking the worst.  Mire tests tomorrow.

I’m so sorry to hear that Bari Jo. My little buddy has partial kidney failure, but it’s mild enough that it just means she drinks a lot of water and pees a lot. I’m pretty sure it was caused by dried turkey strips from a major pet food company that turn out to have been imported from China. They’ve been informally implicated for causing kidney failure, but it’s not likely anything will ever be proven.

Maggie is 14 and in good shape for her age. I dread what I know is coming in the next couple of years, so I make sure we spend a lot of time together.

Stephanie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on December 18, 2017, 02:13:36 am
After coming out to my mom last week, I had a great opportunity to tell my sister in law and brother last night and I completely bottled it :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on December 18, 2017, 04:05:20 am


My dog has been sick, and blood tests show liver failure.  I don't know the cause yet, crying lots.  He is my best friend, my favorite, sometimes only friend. I keep thinking the worst.  Mire tests tomorrow.

Bari Jo

Oh no,  hugs. X

I'm a big animal lover, I hate to see them suffer. PM me if you need a shoulder.

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on December 18, 2017, 04:06:05 am
After coming out to my mom last week, I had a great opportunity to tell my sister in law and brother last night and I completely bottled it :(
If you didn't do it,  then it wasn't the right time for you,  that's all,  don't sweat it.

When you're ready,  it'll happen. X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: BT04 on December 19, 2017, 01:11:20 am
My father's 17-year marriage to my terrible step mother is finally ending - first session with the mediator was today. So I'm happy about that. But wanting a divorce right before Chrismas, and all because you got a $400k inheritance that you don't have to share with your husband and you're mad that he couldn't find an investment for you in time to avoid capital gains? Excuse my censored language, but eat sh*t.

Something on the Jeep's block exploded today, sending coolant everywhere. My mechanic thinks its probably just a freeze plug since it doesn't seem to be mixing with the oil, and that it was running with filthy dex-cool through an even filthier radiator when I bought it 9 months ago, but we talked about replacing the engine anyway, just in case the head is busted. I was hoping to get tires for xmas, but I might be panhandling for engine money from Santa instead. I am NOT giving up on this. The Jeep is my baby. My second damn husband. I named him, I talk to him, and I can't imagine life without him. We'll get through this one way or the other.

Thirdly, the 'friends' who ran me out of the professional comic book business last year due to incompetence (rather than malice) still haven't paid me money that I'm owed, still haven't lived up to a number of stipulations from their own contract, and yet... they're still putting out Kickstarters and raking in the cash. They offered me my dream job once upon a time, and not only botched that but completely ruined our friendship all in one go. I'm never making art for somebody else like that ever again.

And lastly but not leastly, my gender questioning saga continues.

I just want the holidays to be over already.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on December 19, 2017, 08:32:54 am
Apparently I really am that manipulative POS that I try not to be.  Screw BPD and all the negative traits that come with it.  I am really NOT trying to be manipulative. Unfortunately, I don't freaking realize that I am being manipulative until I screw things up and someone finally points out what I did and how it happened.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on December 19, 2017, 08:46:16 am
life
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on December 20, 2017, 01:20:57 pm
Oh Amber,

Have a (hug), just because.

Last state sponsored ‘therapy’ yesterday, but I’m carrying on, I just need to find a way to pay. We talked through potentially going through a diagnostic trail. Personally, I’m past the point of caring - I’ve narrowed ‘suspects’ down to BPD, C-PTSD and/or ADD with a side of gender dysphoria, but suspect that my therapist believes I’m HFA, whatever, stick a bow on it and call me a lemon.

*anxious*/*not anxious* let’s just get this next phase done.

Rowan is quietly panicking, yup, just before Christmas. Hohohoho...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on December 20, 2017, 10:03:40 pm


Oh Amber,

Have a (hug), just because.

Last state sponsored ‘therapy’ yesterday, but I’m carrying on, I just need to find a way to pay. We talked through potentially going through a diagnostic trail. Personally, I’m past the point of caring - I’ve narrowed ‘suspects’ down to BPD, C-PTSD and/or ADD with a side of gender dysphoria, but suspect that my therapist believes I’m HFA, whatever, stick a bow on it and call me a lemon.

*anxious*/*not anxious* let’s just get this next phase done.

Rowan is quietly panicking, yup, just before Christmas. Hohohoho...

Thanks for the hug. Good luck with the diagnostic trial.  Bpd and ADHD hmm sounds familiar .  You get a hug too.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on December 21, 2017, 12:14:06 am
I realized I'm still being ruled by peer pressure today.  We had a screening of Coco at lunch.  It's a tear jerker.  I noticed the guys weren't crying, and I wanted to, but fought it.  Dammit, I really need to be me, not what people expect of me.

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on December 21, 2017, 01:41:34 am
I'm really getting ahead of myself. I want ffs to fix my nose and brow bossing which cause a lot of dysphoria for me but I feel I'm rushing. I wish I had gotten rhinoplasty years ago when I met with a surgeon.. feeling really down lately

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on December 21, 2017, 05:01:14 am
I'm really getting ahead of myself. I want ffs to fix my nose and brow bossing which cause a lot of dysphoria for me but I feel I'm rushing. I wish I had gotten rhinoplasty years ago when I met with a surgeon.. feeling really down lately

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The longer I'm on hrt the less FFS I think I want to do.  I think you just start to be happy with what you have.  Perhaps after a year you won't want as much either?

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on December 21, 2017, 07:28:21 am
The longer I'm on hrt the less FFS I think I want to do.  I think you just start to be happy with what you have.  Perhaps after a year you won't want as much either?

Bari Jo
That's good to hear! I'm happy for you I'm waiting it out..i have a while to go still

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on December 21, 2017, 10:44:51 am
Found out last night I'm basically solo cooking all of Christmas dinner. This happens every freaking time, big plans are developed but then I'm the one who actually has to carry them out. :-X So now everyone else will be sitting around chatting or doing whatever while I'm rushing back and forth trying to juggle things in the worst oven known to man. Then to top it off, received a last minute special request for some latkes I cooked a few years ago (my step mother is non-observant Jewish, but when her parents were in town one year I made them) meaning I have to go track down shallots (for whatever reason stores close to me do not stock them reliably) and juggle frying on top of everything else.

Ugh, this is going to be a stressful nightmare, and I really, really don't want to deal with it right now.

(And that's on top of that we usually do christmas day meal at a buffet at one of two really high end local places that do special holiday spreads, which I was really looking forward to because the more likely one we'd go to is where they make my precious creme brulee french toast I am trying to desperately to replicate.  :-\)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on December 21, 2017, 12:41:31 pm
@Roll then don't do it! I'm sure they'll figure something out


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on December 21, 2017, 12:57:51 pm
@Roll then don't do it! I'm sure they'll figure something out


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Trust me, not an option if I want to ever have peace again. ;D
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on December 21, 2017, 04:43:57 pm
I had a really nice dream where it was summer and I was running through a beautiful green field during a gorgeous sunset and I felt awesome. Then I woke up and it was the first day of winter  >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on December 21, 2017, 04:54:24 pm
I had a really nice dream where it was summer and I was running through a beautiful green field during a gorgeous sunset and I felt awesome. Then I woke up and it was the first day of winter  >:(

I love winter, I just don't want to live in the snow and ice, I grew up there. Not enough fun for the work.

A comment, hopefully that helps ease it a bit, Whenever I read one of your posts your profile pic grabs my eye. A startling intense look where I can't help but stare back. Awesomely lovely photo.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on December 21, 2017, 09:11:37 pm
I love winter, I just don't want to live in the snow and ice, I grew up there. Not enough fun for the work.

A comment, hopefully that helps ease it a bit, Whenever I read one of your posts your profile pic grabs my eye. A startling intense look where I can't help but stare back. Awesomely lovely photo.

awww thank you!! <3
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Angela49 on December 22, 2017, 07:17:04 am
I was out to dinner with my wife ( we are separated but still get along) and she casually states how this Christmas is sucking because she has to worry about buying male items for one of her "daughters" (yes he is trans too) and female items for her husnand.
Thought I was done hurting her. Aperantly not.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on December 22, 2017, 08:46:24 am
I was out to dinner with my wife ( we are separated but still get along) and she casually states how this Christmas is sucking because she has to worry about buying male items for one of her "daughters" (yes he is trans too) and female items for her husnand.
Thought I was done hurting her. Aperantly not.

Don't take that on yourself, if she is complaining about her son as well that is all on her. (An ex-spouse being bitter and making a snide remark about their ex is one thing, and even if not healthy or good, is at least understandable. Saying it about their child is something else entirely.)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Angela49 on December 22, 2017, 10:48:32 am
I am pretty much over it now but last night was pretty tough.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: BT04 on December 22, 2017, 11:10:44 am
My father's 17-year marriage to my terrible step mother is finally ending - first session with the mediator was today. So I'm happy about that. But wanting a divorce right before Chrismas, and all because you got a $400k inheritance that you don't have to share with your husband and you're mad that he couldn't find an investment for you in time to avoid capital gains? Excuse my censored language, but eat sh*t.

Something on the Jeep's block exploded today, sending coolant everywhere. My mechanic thinks its probably just a freeze plug since it doesn't seem to be mixing with the oil, and that it was running with filthy dex-cool through an even filthier radiator when I bought it 9 months ago, but we talked about replacing the engine anyway, just in case the head is busted. I was hoping to get tires for xmas, but I might be panhandling for engine money from Santa instead. I am NOT giving up on this. The Jeep is my baby. My second damn husband. I named him, I talk to him, and I can't imagine life without him. We'll get through this one way or the other.

Thirdly, the 'friends' who ran me out of the professional comic book business last year due to incompetence (rather than malice) still haven't paid me money that I'm owed, still haven't lived up to a number of stipulations from their own contract, and yet... they're still putting out Kickstarters and raking in the cash. They offered me my dream job once upon a time, and not only botched that but completely ruined our friendship all in one go. I'm never making art for somebody else like that ever again.

And lastly but not leastly, my gender questioning saga continues.

I just want the holidays to be over already.

Things are looking better. Was just in a bad spot. Husband had mumps too, of all things, but he's going to be feeling better for xmas. The Jeep is fine, turns out it was just a hose - I had my mech do a compression test anyways, and at 200k miles his engine is still perfectly healthy, woohoo.

The rest is going to be a lot easier to deal with now.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on December 22, 2017, 11:28:46 am
Scumbag twice tried to knock me off my bike
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on December 22, 2017, 07:04:46 pm
Scumbag twice tried to knock me off my bike

 Yes Kim that would make me mad also even though I am one of the motorists that is always losing road and roads space to you cyclists her in Portland, Oregon.  One of the most bicycle friendly places in the country. It doesn't mean I would go around trying to knock one off the road. I wouldn't even do it to one out in the countryside that doesn't want to share the road though I will admit it could be tempting.

hugs,
  Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on December 22, 2017, 07:05:06 pm
Being broke and feeling lonely  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on December 22, 2017, 09:33:53 pm
Ugh, had a short lived but fairly bad hit from pure dysphoria. I decided to put myself together and sit around full femme mode playing games. So I do my makeup and all that "fun" stuff. Fully dressed, i look in the mirror... and I just look bad. No beard shadow, but face just looked super, crazy wide and masculine looking. It was a huge start since I wasn't expecting it at all, normally makeup has a pretty solid feminizing effect on me. While I eventually calmed down and realized I must have accidentally botched my makeup in a way that contoured me in a negative manner and what I was seeing was a bit of illusion, unfortunately the damage was already done and I had went through the array of "oh god, it's was all a lie, I'll never pass" thoughts. Really put a damper on my evening. First time removing makeup ever made me feel better about myself, and I looked less masculine with the beard shadow showing somehow. Still not entirely sure what went wrong, I basically just did foundation/beard cover.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on December 22, 2017, 09:51:07 pm
Ugh, had a short lived but fairly bad hit from pure dysphoria. I decided to put myself together and sit around full femme mode playing games. So I do my makeup and all that "fun" stuff. Fully dressed, i look in the mirror... and I just look bad. No beard shadow, but face just looked super, crazy wide and masculine looking. It was a huge start since I wasn't expecting it at all, normally makeup has a pretty solid feminizing effect on me. While I eventually calmed down and realized I must have accidentally botched my makeup in a way that contoured me in a negative manner and what I was seeing was a bit of illusion, unfortunately the damage was already done and I had went through the array of "oh god, it's was all a lie, I'll never pass" thoughts. Really put a damper on my evening. First time removing makeup ever made me feel better about myself, and I looked less masculine with the beard shadow showing somehow. Still not entirely sure what went wrong, I basically just did foundation/beard cover.
That happens to me a lot too! Maybe it's just starting hrt it feels like taking a huge leap and feeling like I have to rely on makeup stresses me out so much. I think makeup should enhance features but to use it to cover or create an illusion makes me even more dysphoric.. that's been my experience at least

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on December 22, 2017, 11:26:16 pm
Constantly misgendered today. Too much investment for negative returns. Feeling like it’s not worth it.


 - Steph
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on December 23, 2017, 12:36:00 am
Cold callers (I suspect), who gave me a panic attack, as they called, number unknown, twice with a short gap between.

I panicked because my GP has finally decided to see how far in the basement my T level is, and I am waiting on the results of my blood tests..  :-\

This could lead to some ‘interesting’ conversations....


Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on December 23, 2017, 08:08:30 am
Well since I am working through all the holidays till the new year I was going out dress like this with my room mate that has never been out in public with me as we park the car she says "I dont know I if can do this' I said what she said "every one looking "  so we left she was not happy leaving but I was obviously an embarrassment to here just as I have been forever Well this is what i looked like
(https://i.imgur.com/IWHmvDK.jpg)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on December 23, 2017, 08:15:13 am
Constantly misgendered today. Too much investment for negative returns. Feeling like it’s not worth it.


 - Steph
If I said,  hand back your new IDs,  get back in your old drab clothes,  would you be happy? I reckon I know your answer... So it IS worth it, but sadly that doesn't mean others are going to make it easy for us. Live your life, and let others say or think what they want. X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on December 23, 2017, 09:53:40 am
Well since I am working through all the holidays till the new year I was going out dress like this with my room mate that has never been out in public with me as we park the car she says "I dont know I if can do this' I said what she said "every one looking "  so we left she was not happy leaving but I was obviously an embarrassment to here just as I have been forever Well this is what i looked like

So sorry to hear that Natalie, just remember that is all on her not you! I doubt anyone would have even given you a second glance.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on December 23, 2017, 09:57:12 am
Well since I am working through all the holidays till the new year I was going out dress like this with my room mate that has never been out in public with me as we park the car she says "I dont know I if can do this' I said what she said "every one looking "  so we left she was not happy leaving but I was obviously an embarrassment to here just as I have been forever Well this is what i looked like
(https://i.imgur.com/IWHmvDK.jpg)

I would not be embarrassed at all, you look great. It's your room mate's insecurity and problem. I'm sorry you didn't get a pleasant day out.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on December 23, 2017, 10:48:56 am
Thank you both Roll and Faith I appreciate it, you both made me feel better
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on December 23, 2017, 04:44:09 pm
Thank you both Roll and Faith I appreciate it, you both made me feel better

   My gosh What is wrong with your roommate. No one was staring except to see at least one good looking girl (you) but more than likely two. I'll bet she is used to getting those looks and liking them. It's only that she knows you are trans that set off her own transphobia and insecurities.

Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sephirah on December 23, 2017, 05:00:18 pm
Being broke and feeling lonely  :P

*extra big hug*

You're not alone, Virginia. :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: DawnOday on December 23, 2017, 05:28:07 pm
Just received my wife's Christmas present. Received a table top, no pedestal, no chairs. It's been in transit for a month. Online shopping, don't ya just love it.  All the pictures show a complete set w/4 chairs. Luckily I am able to cope now thanks to E. I called logistics and was very respectful. In my former form I would have cussed them out for half an hour. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on December 23, 2017, 10:17:38 pm
I'm thinking about quitting my band. We played a show tonight and the drummer was so off, in our first song he doubled the tempo during the 2nd verse and it totally threw me off so I couldn't sing, and the rest of the set he kept speeding up and slowing down too. I wasn't having any fun and I felt like I was going through the motions. I've been trying to think of someone who can replace him, I asked a friend of mine last week who is an amazing drummer but he doesn't have the time. Our bassist isn't really any good either, he's super sloppy. I'm writing songs that I really like and these guys aren't doing them any justice. And not many of my friends came out tonight either. I just feel like no one cares so why bother?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Angela Drakken on December 23, 2017, 10:19:24 pm
Hit with the RLE road block for my srs approval from OHIP. Ah well, wait I must.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on December 23, 2017, 10:26:48 pm
   My gosh What is wrong with your roommate. No one was staring except to see at least one good looking girl (you) but more than likely two. I'll bet she is used to getting those looks and liking them. It's only that she knows you are trans that set off her own transphobia and insecurities.

Hugs,
   Laurie

Thank you Laurie you it makes sense, She is fine with me in private but never been in public with me.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Mariah on December 23, 2017, 10:31:49 pm
We are always here for you. So many others around us might not be but we are always here for you. Big hugs
Mariah
Being broke and feeling lonely  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on December 24, 2017, 06:06:19 am
I'm thinking about quitting my band. We played a show tonight and the drummer was so off, in our first song he doubled the tempo during the 2nd verse and it totally threw me off so I couldn't sing, and the rest of the set he kept speeding up and slowing down too. I wasn't having any fun and I felt like I was going through the motions. I've been trying to think of someone who can replace him, I asked a friend of mine last week who is an amazing drummer but he doesn't have the time. Our bassist isn't really any good either, he's super sloppy. I'm writing songs that I really like and these guys aren't doing them any justice. And not many of my friends came out tonight either. I just feel like no one cares so why bother?

I tried being in a band. They leeched all the fun out of it. Now I just play/sing at home for myself and go to a local jam. If they mess up more than I can handle at the jam, I can just leave :)

Anything like this has to be fun first.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on December 24, 2017, 03:27:43 pm
 It is Christmas Eve. Actually the Christmas Holiday as a whole. But Christmas eve and day are the worst of it especially this year.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on December 24, 2017, 04:34:43 pm
I’m finding it to be increasingly difficult to be around women. Me and my friends went for our annual Christmas Eve curry, but one of my friends bought their partner, she’s great, honestly, me and her got on really well, but I had my typical ‘gay guy, I can be your best friend’ demeanour on, when really, I wanted to be her so badly, she said she was self conscious about her body, but I would’ve done anything to have a body even remotely similar to her’s. I nearly came out as trans so many times, I’m literally like a ticking time bomb at the moment
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on December 24, 2017, 05:12:18 pm
I am tired, just completely soul crushingly exhausted, and in incredible amounts of pain. I have spent every waking moment on my feet preparing for tomorrow, and there has been mishap after mishap. The chocolate I was melting to do some truffles just refused to melt and then decided to go from solid to burn instantly. As a result, they are horrible little clumpy things that just don't look appetizing at all. I've also only done 2 out of the 5 things I need to prep before tomorrow and it is past 6pm. I am not even going to be cooking until midnight, I'm going to be PREPPING until midnight just to get up and cook more tomorrow morning. My back has been killing me (for days now, I might not be drinking enough on the spiro), my feet are in agony, and to top it off I severely burned myself doing the stupidest things possible. First, I was making pasta for mac and cheese. I had a big spoon for stirring, and a little spoon for something else. My brain just thought "spoon", I picked up a spoon and went to stir the noodles. Oh, except I picked up the little spoon, so I wound up STICKING MY HAND IN THE BOILING WATER (since I was mentally judging it by the spoon hitting the bottom I guess). Fortunately, I managed to survive that okay, I reacted quickly and the burn was minor. Then later, I was going to make some crumb topping. I noticed my little pan had some debris in it, so i went to pick it out. Unfortunately, I forgot I had already turned on the stove. So I stick my fingers in the pan (SAME FINGERS FROM THE WATER) to pick up the piece of whatever, and my brain just ceased to function and I sort of left them there for a few seconds in my ever debilitating state of mind. So yeah. I cooked my finger tip. Like 100% literally cooked my freaking finger tip.

Did I mention I still have 3 more things to prepare iand then hours of cooking tomorrow?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on December 25, 2017, 02:07:20 am
I am tired, just completely soul crushingly exhausted, and in incredible amounts of pain. I have spent every waking moment on my feet preparing for tomorrow, and there has been mishap after mishap. The chocolate I was melting to do some truffles just refused to melt and then decided to go from solid to burn instantly. As a result, they are horrible little clumpy things that just don't look appetizing at all. I've also only done 2 out of the 5 things I need to prep before tomorrow and it is past 6pm. I am not even going to be cooking until midnight, I'm going to be PREPPING until midnight just to get up and cook more tomorrow morning. My back has been killing me (for days now, I might not be drinking enough on the spiro), my feet are in agony, and to top it off I severely burned myself doing the stupidest things possible. First, I was making pasta for mac and cheese. I had a big spoon for stirring, and a little spoon for something else. My brain just thought "spoon", I picked up a spoon and went to stir the noodles. Oh, except I picked up the little spoon, so I wound up STICKING MY HAND IN THE BOILING WATER (since I was mentally judging it by the spoon hitting the bottom I guess). Fortunately, I managed to survive that okay, I reacted quickly and the burn was minor. Then later, I was going to make some crumb topping. I noticed my little pan had some debris in it, so i went to pick it out. Unfortunately, I forgot I had already turned on the stove. So I stick my fingers in the pan (SAME FINGERS FROM THE WATER) to pick up the piece of whatever, and my brain just ceased to function and I sort of left them there for a few seconds in my ever debilitating state of mind. So yeah. I cooked my finger tip. Like 100% literally cooked my freaking finger tip.

Did I mention I still have 3 more things to prepare iand then hours of cooking tomorrow?
Oh no,  sending hugs for you and extra gentle ones for your finger.
You sound you like to run your kitchen like I do, but try not to take it all on, use the Jedi power of delegation! X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on December 25, 2017, 09:33:40 am
Bah humbug! 30 minutes of unwrapping fun followed by 2 hours of yelling at children and clean up.  Now it's whoosh off to the in-laws (some may remember hearing about them from Thanksgiving in another thread). Yippee Skippy, dealing with unaccepting family.  Is it over yet?

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Devlyn on December 25, 2017, 09:37:51 am
Bah humbug! 30 minutes of unwrapping fun followed by 2 hours of yelling at children and clean up.  Now it's whoosh off to the in-laws (some may remember hearing about them from Thanksgiving in another thread). Yippee Skippy, dealing with unaccepting family.  Is it over yet?

Sounds like Christmas is performing exactly to factory specs!  :laugh: 

Good luck with fam.

Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on December 25, 2017, 03:44:12 pm
Sounds like Christmas is performing exactly to factory specs!  You left out the fight, my detestable ex BIL used to turn up with a 6 pack of rubbish lager, help himself to Dad's single malt whisky then fight Dad, me, his sons or daughters boyfriends. He always lost!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on December 26, 2017, 05:00:20 pm
I went to JC Penney's with a friend today with a $50 gift card and I ended up not buying anything. I wanted a new pair of black leggings and they were out of my size, and I wanted some sleepwear and again nothing really in my size. I almost got a couple v-neck t shirts that I could use but I didn't end up getting them because I figured it would just be better to save the card for later. Then I got home and tried on some clothes and I felt like nothing fits me right, even some really cute clothes that I bought over the summer are too big on me now! I can wait until the spring to get more dresses but I could really use some cute tops!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on December 27, 2017, 01:49:59 am
My eldest niece got a gift voucher stolen in Marks & Spencers by a woman who deliberately barged into her, knocked them out of her hand, picked them up & took 1 for herself. Kaths a very delicate timid girl & this was a much bigger older woman.
My ex BIL continues to blow his life up & be a PITA to everyone he comes near, he's drunk so much that he's drunk without drinking. My nephews & nieces refuse to have anything to do with him til he straightens up but he still tries to meddle in their lives (they're 22 to 31). I'm at my sisters yesterday & a neighbour tells me there's a drunk guy sat on my bike, sure enough it's him. I must be getting softer in my old age, a few years ago I would have chinned him
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on December 27, 2017, 06:39:53 am
The weather's been absolute crap for 3 days in a row and I want to go out. When it's as bad as this it rattles the tiles on the side of the building all night and usually rips a few off. I said in another thread I don't like total silence when trying to sleep but when the storms are happening here it sounds like someone falling around on the roof for 12 hours at a time. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on December 27, 2017, 07:58:16 am
My dog is worrying me again.  He's not jaundice anymore, and is eating his hepatic diet food, but he groans in his sleep.  He also Won't Leave my side.  Wherever I go he climbs into my lap.  If I get near my bed he climbs in hoping it's time to sleep.  He's obviously not feeling well.  I wish dogs could just tell you what's wrong.

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: DawnOday on December 27, 2017, 10:18:26 am
My dog is worrying me again.  He's not jaundice anymore, and is eating his hepatic diet food, but he groans in his sleep.  He also Won't Leave my side.  Wherever I go he climbs into my lap.  If I get near my bed he climbs in hoping it's time to sleep.  He's obviously not feeling well.  I wish dogs could just tell you what's wrong.

Bari Jo

Bari  Every dog I've ever had, yelps, jerks and seems to be fighting off packs of cats. They also love to climb on the bed and lie down next to me. The biggest problem I see in this has to do with my king size bed. If I start in the middle, every time I turn over the dogs get that much closer to me. Eventually by the end of the night my butt cheeks are hanging over the edge.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on December 27, 2017, 11:53:13 am
Got turned down for yet another job.

Oops, make that 2 jobs.  >:(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on December 27, 2017, 05:36:13 pm
Received a call from my father yesterday who rang from New Zealand to tell me one of my Aunties has just been diagnosed with cancer and advised to "put her house in order" she has a massive untreatable tumour under her arm that extends across her chest along with secondaries in her lungs.

She and I have had a very special relationship for many years with her being one of the only people from the extended family who came to our wedding...more recently she was the only Aunty or Uncle to actually ring me after I came out to find out how I was doing. She has cared about me and for me in so many ways that were far over and above what is normally expected from Aunties and Uncles in my family.

This makes me incredibly sad just to think about it....I am frantically trying to organise a new passport so I can get over and see her. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on December 27, 2017, 05:49:46 pm
Very sorry to hear of this Elizabeth  :'(

*Super Monster Hugs*
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on December 27, 2017, 06:01:49 pm
So sorry to hear this Liz.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on December 27, 2017, 06:10:10 pm
Sorry Liz,  sending love. X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Devlyn on December 27, 2017, 06:19:32 pm
Big hug, Liz! Use the time to tell her how much she mattered to you.

Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on December 27, 2017, 06:21:28 pm
Thank you all for the kind words...Bad things happen to good people and sometimes life just sucks!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on December 27, 2017, 11:02:47 pm
  Yes, Liz, sometimes life just sucks especially when it sucks for a loved one. You'll get that paperwork all approved and get your new passport so you can go visit her and let her know how she is loved by you.

Hugs,
  Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on December 28, 2017, 02:41:27 am
Sorry Liz, make the most of your time together
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: virtualverny on December 28, 2017, 12:41:21 pm
my on-and-off (currently off) boyfriend telling me all about his new girlfriend. it's even worse considering she used to give me relationship advice and would try to help us get back together the other times we broke up :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on December 28, 2017, 12:47:41 pm
my on-and-off (currently off) boyfriend telling me all about his new girlfriend. it's even worse considering she used to give me relationship advice and would try to help us get back together the other times we broke up :(
Oh no,  sry hun,  have a ((hug)). X

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on December 28, 2017, 03:45:51 pm
Went to the Subway for a bite to eat & a pair of chav scum were tormenting a young boy with learning difficulties & his carer. I straightened them up
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on December 28, 2017, 07:07:34 pm
 The holidays have made me more sensitive than usual. That and having so much free time makes me think about my ex ALL THE FREAKING TIME. I can’t get him out of my head. Oh well a few more days and these vacations will be over.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on December 28, 2017, 10:05:43 pm
 This is just a small thing but.. Today we received a box from my sister in Colorado. You know the one that took my daughter's side in her public Facebook attack on me blaming me for a lot of things and stating she was not accepting me as trans. Well my sister supported her and said she didn't support me either.
  Anyway this box arrives addressed to  Leonard and Karen. I left it for my sister Karen to open and went to my electrolysis appointment. When I get home I see this big (the biggest one they sell) box of chocolate covered cherries. It is well known that I like these and I usually get some at Christmas up until this year, until this box showed up. I picked it up and took it out to my sister and told her to give it to her son and his wife. She asked,  "Why? You don't want them?"  I replied. "They were sent to Leonard and he isn't here anymore."
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on December 28, 2017, 10:07:40 pm
...... I replied. "They were sent to Leonard and he isn't here anymore."

Absolutely!!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on December 28, 2017, 11:07:02 pm
And what has been my #1 area of dysphoria has struck me for the first time in a while...

Just trimmed my hair around the sides pretty heavily after letting it grow out a good bit for about two months. :/ Down from about an inch and a half or two inches to down to 3/4 inch. I was taking stock of my regrowth from hair regimen and realized that even if it has been very positive and showing great results so far, I still was nowhere near the point I could grow hair out and look like anything but a medieval friar or aging rock band roadie. Even at 1.5-2 inches it was looking really bad. So I bit the bullet, and trimmed to a reasonable length that doesn't create quite as much of a contrast with the still very thin parts of scalp.

I just want my own hair so bad I got ahead of myself, letting unrealistic expectations and images run rampant. Someday I'll be there... but not today, and probably not even two years from now after I have to wait for meds to have done their thing and then go through the transplant process(that recovery time alone...). *sigh*

Not a huge deal all things considered, just a nasty dose of reality.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on December 29, 2017, 12:24:14 am
 It could be worse Ellie. I doubt I have enough hair left to be able to do transplants. Still I vainly grow what little hair I have out.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on December 29, 2017, 12:39:51 am
I've got one of those gnarly headaches I get from time to time that make me wonder if surviving was such a good thing  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on December 29, 2017, 02:40:18 am
My sister sent me a photo of us from a few years ago when I was 22. It makes me very sad. I looked like I would have benefited so much from hrt then and these past few years I've been in limbo would have made a difference... I deleted it so I don't keep looking at it and beating myself up over something I can never change

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on December 29, 2017, 02:46:03 am
My sister sent me a photo of us from a few years ago when I was 22. It makes me very sad. I looked like I would have benefited so much from hrt then and these past few years I've been in limbo would have made a difference... I deleted it so I don't keep looking at it and beating myself up over something I can never change

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Hon, Never worry about the past nothing can change it. Fight for every second of now and plan and live for the future. The past is immaterial.
Live your life and love it.

BIG HUG
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on December 29, 2017, 03:14:00 am
Hon, Never worry about the past nothing can change it. Fight for every second of now and plan and live for the future. The past is immaterial.
Live your life and love it.

BIG HUG
Thanks Cindy that means a lot to hear right now

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on December 29, 2017, 06:07:08 am
Hon, Never worry about the past nothing can change it. Fight for every second of now and plan and live for the future. The past is immaterial.
Live your life and love it.

When I came out to a friend of mine, he told me a story to illustrate exactly that point:

Imagine you’re sitting in your car facing forward. In front of you there’s a huge windshield and a tiny mirror.

Looking through the windshield you see what’s in front of you - the future. In the mirror you see what’s behind - your past.

The sizes of the two views represent their relative importance to your life.

Acknowledge your past, but embrace that beautiful panoramic view in front of you, and keep moving forward.

- Stephanie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on December 29, 2017, 07:39:11 am


When I came out to a friend of mine, he told me a story to illustrate exactly that point:

Imagine you’re sitting in your car facing forward. In front of you there’s a huge windshield and a tiny mirror.

Looking through the windshield you see what’s in front of you - the future. In the mirror you see what’s behind - your past.

The sizes of the two views represent their relative importance to your life.

Acknowledge your past, but embrace that beautiful panoramic view in front of you, and keep moving forward.

- Stephanie

This is making me tear up at the coffee shop im in right now such a beautiful story and I think hrt is working just fine for me this morning lol

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on December 29, 2017, 08:17:14 am
I found my old posts from here, from way back in 2006... its from my old account..... im now 31 *sigh*

hi people my name is christy-lee i am a m-f transgender who has not come out of the closet yet, i am 19 years old and have had this feeling most of my life no one knows that i am transgender, and i have not started the operation or hormones yet but once i come out of the closet i will

i have told my cousin that i am biesexual, and she took it ok, and this girl i met on the internet (who lives close to me) knows fully about me wanting to be fem but thats as close as ive got

oh yeh im from australia :)


yeh i would gladly switch places with u :)

ive known pretty much all my life but only really smart enough to realise what i knew at 13ish

well i knew around about 15 actually because 2 years before that i spent wanting to be female for a guy and i found how natural it for me as a female

 was he was bi curious so so we were together for awhile but he broke it off  :(

Was chatting with a ftm heh

Me trying to figure sh!t out, i now realize it wasnt just for that guy, i was using him as an excuse to think about it.. or atleast give myself permission to think about it? idk ...., also i feel like im alot more secure about it then i was back then, well kind of yes and no

I know im def not Bisexual...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TonyaW on December 29, 2017, 10:46:52 am
The scale.  Up 10 pounds from last year, 15 from my lowest of 2017.  I always eat too much of thev holiday treats but avoided the weight bump last year.  Too many lame excuses not to get to the gym to keep it under control this year I guess. 

If there's any good in this, my pants still fit so I guess its going to the right places now. 

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on December 29, 2017, 12:06:41 pm
The scale.  Up 10 pounds from last year, 15 from my lowest of 2017.  I always eat too much of thev holiday treats but avoided the weight bump last year.  Too many lame excuses not to get to the gym to keep it under control this year I guess. 

If there's any good in this, my pants still fit so I guess its going to the right places now. 

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk

I'm terrified to weigh myself right now. Between Thanksgiving, my emotional hit around late nov/early dec waiting on hormones, then non stop Christmas related stuff, and now a New Years thing... God, I'll count it a win if I only put back on less than 10 pounds.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on December 29, 2017, 12:30:54 pm
The scale.  Up 10 pounds from last year, 15 from my lowest of 2017.  I always eat too much of thev holiday treats but avoided the weight bump last year.  Too many lame excuses not to get to the gym to keep it under control this year I guess. 

If there's any good in this, my pants still fit so I guess its going to the right places now. 

Scale says I gained 5 pounds with all the big dinners & eating out I did in the last couple weeks. For good or ill, I STILL feel full. That might actually be a bit of the bug that's been going around town, though.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on December 29, 2017, 03:31:10 pm
The POS who was tormenting the learning disabled guy & his carer yesterday kicked a homeless guy in the face as he walked past.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on January 02, 2018, 04:28:09 pm
Work was atrocious today.  Seriously, can they put me on with someone other than the guy with an IQ of 80?  If we are understaffed to begin with I can't spend all day babysitting my coworker.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on January 02, 2018, 06:41:17 pm
Amber I'm right there with you hun I took every chance to run out of work even without my coat on. Had a random guy in the lobby at my job ask me "where you going? Are you leaving?"
Like it's none of your business!! I don't know why it annoys me. Yet I'm single and not really too thrilled about that either. What's wrong with me?

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on January 02, 2018, 07:28:00 pm
After work I met my sister at my grandmother's house. My grandmother passed away on easter and her house finally sold and tomorrow is the closing. we've gone a few times recently and hung out but tonight was our absolute last chance. She brought her dog and we were in the bedroom where my grandma died and the dog got all sad and started to whimper. at one point my sister took her dog outside and I was all alone in that house possibly for the first time ever. I tried to feel some spiritual connection to it but it just wasn't there, i was really hoping to feel my grandmother's presence and I didn't and I think I realized that her being there is what made it special. Then when we were about to leave we stepped out into the back room and I said "this was always my favorite room" and that's when I started to lose it. I got choked up and shed a few tears. Then once I got out to my car I just broke down crying, I think I cried harder tonight than I did on the day of her funeral!

I still haven't told my sister about me yet but I want to soon. A couple weeks ago I decided that the house wasn't the place to tell her about it, it didn't seem right, but I want to tell her within the next 3 weeks. For a while I thought she was suspecting something but then I made a comment last night about how it hurt to shave yesterday because my skin was so bad because of how cold it's been the last couple days and she said I just shouldn't shave then. I told her I didn't want a beard and then changed the subject lol
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 02, 2018, 10:40:37 pm
Monster tooth ache from the bad place  :P  and I forgot to pick up some Oragel at the store earlier  :eusa_doh:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 02, 2018, 10:44:28 pm
Sounds like the name of a horror movie "Monster Toothache from the Bad Place". 

Hope it gets better thar Ms Clint Eastwoodette :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on January 02, 2018, 11:42:07 pm
My work shorted my pay by 30 hours  15 of them are time and a half so mad can not figure out how they can not add and the people that can sign a cheque are on vacation
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 03, 2018, 12:30:22 am
The horror gets even better  :-\   When I put my glasses on to watch TV I noticed that one of the lenses has gone missing... Ugh!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ann W on January 03, 2018, 02:10:33 am
OK, I'm not complaining -- or, if I am, I have only myself to blame -- but I fell off the diet wagon yesterday. I've lost a lot of weight since March, I hit my target weight (finally!) about 10 days ago ... but there is a transitioning period back to maintenance level calorie intake, during which I continue to lose weight, but gain it back. End-of-diet weight gain is frustrating, but unavoidable. I want to *stay* at or below my target.

So, yesterday, I had a few drinks, ate popcorn (which I love) and some candy and raisins -- not much -- that were lying around. All-in-all, I think I consumed about 500 calories more than my maintenance level -- enough to gain maybe one-sixth of a pound -- which was, nonetheless, about 1600 more than I was supposed to, on the program. My weight shot up past my target (water retention). I know it will come back down again; but it's still a bummer to look at the scales and see the number I saw when I got up today.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on January 03, 2018, 04:46:02 am
OK, I'm not complaining -- or, if I am, I have only myself to blame -- but I fell off the diet wagon yesterday. I've lost a lot of weight since March, I hit my target weight (finally!) about 10 days ago ... but there is a transitioning period back to maintenance level calorie intake, during which I continue to lose weight, but gain it back. End-of-diet weight gain is frustrating, but unavoidable. I want to *stay* at or below my target.

So, yesterday, I had a few drinks, ate popcorn (which I love) and some candy and raisins -- not much -- that were lying around. All-in-all, I think I consumed about 500 calories more than my maintenance level -- enough to gain maybe one-sixth of a pound -- which was, nonetheless, about 1600 more than I was supposed to, on the program. My weight shot up past my target (water retention). I know it will come back down again; but it's still a bummer to look at the scales and see the number I saw when I got up today.

I hit my goal like 2 or 3 weeks ago and I've been cheating ever since because of all the food around for the holidays, I'm terrified to weigh myself again! I think I'm going to weigh in on friday, I've been eating better this week
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on January 03, 2018, 12:39:55 pm
Just when I thought I was getting ahead cra hit me with a $1115 bill for income tax
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 03, 2018, 12:48:14 pm
Mean CRA, mean!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on January 03, 2018, 12:59:35 pm
I hit my goal like 2 or 3 weeks ago and I've been cheating ever since because of all the food around for the holidays, I'm terrified to weigh myself again! I think I'm going to weigh in on friday, I've been eating better this week

I'm right there with you.  I am trying to eat better now, but damn, this season sucks for the diet.

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 03, 2018, 01:01:30 pm
VM - Cyclops glasses, woooooo.

Your comment reminded me that I need to start looking at new frames.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Galyo on January 03, 2018, 02:24:10 pm
What makes me unhappy is the fact that I worry a lot about my future and ability to live as a woman, and I can't for the life of me put this into words, not even to my partner. So I'm in a situation where I somehow have to accept this emotional chaos going on in my head and try not to worry myself to death (quite literally so).
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Angela Drakken on January 03, 2018, 04:07:31 pm
Arguing with some silly woman at the bank that I don't WANT any note on my file stating my former name/gender even though she INSISTED it would 'prevent problems in the future!' and that it was 'for my own good!'

..I'm gonna call the bank tomorrow and speak to someone else to have it removed.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on January 03, 2018, 05:23:32 pm
The drain pipe for our washing machine is clogged and dumped water all over the floor.  Wife is helpless about it.  Guess it's good I had years of guyness to know how to deal with this kind of situation.  All I wanted to do tonight was my nails.  2018 is not starting well.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on January 03, 2018, 05:39:19 pm
Oh gheeeze Amber,

  What a mess to clean up after clearing the drain. What a pita. Don't break those nails they are hard to get to grow back.

Hugs,
  Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on January 03, 2018, 06:20:02 pm
No broken nails, but I did somehow manage to scrape a knuckle unclearing the drain, plus having to run to Lowe's for a snake.  Just bleh.  I was washing the bedding so now I will have somewhere to sleep tonight once I get things run through.  And my nails still aren't done.  Had gels on and they need to soak off.  I was in the middle of that process when this went down.  So I have one hand sans polish and he other with it still on.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 03, 2018, 06:32:36 pm
VM - Cyclops glasses, woooooo.

Your comment reminded me that I need to start looking at new frames.

Yeah, other than the headache and nausea I guess it's not too bad and besides my toothache was lonely and needed some companionship

The only thing I'm really concerned with is the cost as I have a somewhat expensive prescription and it is really bad timing to have to deal with this right now
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 04, 2018, 02:46:57 am
Just when I think I got rid of a cold it come's back turbo charged dialled up to 12. Dripping with snot, coughing up greenys & a voice like I gargle with rusty razor blades in battery acid
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on January 04, 2018, 04:28:49 am
My cellphone was stolen. I'm gonna have to buy a new one and I really don't want to spend that money, it's money I don't really have, but I have to buy another one, I can't be without a phone...Will have to use my credit card. Saddest part is that I'm still paying for the stolen one. Ugh.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on January 04, 2018, 08:18:34 am
I'm hunkered down waiting out the east coast blizzard. Thursday is my busiest day and I'm missing out on 8 hours of client time that I won't get paid for.

If that weren't enough Randi and our son, Clayton, are on the South Carolina/Georgia border trying to get to Florida. Those folks down there are un-educated about snow and don't really have the right tools anyway. I'm not sure they'll get down there in time for our niece's wedding. A least I can follow their progress on Google Maps.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 04, 2018, 12:35:37 pm
I'm hunkered down waiting out the east coast blizzard. Thursday is my busiest day and I'm missing out on 8 hours of client time that I won't get paid for.

If that weren't enough Randi and our son, Clayton, are on the South Carolina/Georgia border trying to get to Florida. Those folks down there are un-educated about snow and don't really have the right tools anyway.

I was just about to say the power going out (and not staying on for more than a few minutes at a time today) down here in se GA due to ice storm (not even snow, just ice) was making me unhappy. It's true, we don't know what we're doing with the cold stuff and no one has the right anything. I'm freezing in weather that most people wouldn't think twice about because I straight up don't own any clothes meant for sub 60 degree weather. ;D

Seriously though, this is a disaster where I am. There is still so many damaged trees from the hurricane in sept, that the ice is weighing down everything and bringing the weakened branches and entire trees down all over the place. Fortunately the worst is over and it isnt expected to rain again.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on January 04, 2018, 02:28:10 pm
I was just about to say the power going out (and not staying on for more than a few minutes at a time today) down here in se GA due to ice storm (not even snow, just ice) was making me unhappy. It's true, we don't know what we're doing with the cold stuff and no one has the right anything. I'm freezing in weather that most people wouldn't think twice about because I straight up don't own any clothes meant for sub 60 degree weather. ;D

Seriously though, this is a disaster where I am. There is still so many damaged trees from the hurricane in sept, that the ice is weighing down everything and bringing the weakened branches and entire trees down all over the place. Fortunately the worst is over and it isnt expected to rain again.
Please don't think I was criticizing. There's no real reason for you folks to have the materials OR the knowledge. This is far beyond "once in a blue moon" territory. Let's hope it stays that way.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 04, 2018, 03:15:45 pm
Please don't think I was criticizing. There's no real reason for you folks to have the materials OR the knowledge. This is far beyond "once in a blue moon" territory. Let's hope it stays that way.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Oh, I didn't think that. :D It's totally true though no one how to deal with it. I think some people learned their lesson in 2014 (the storm that shut down Atlanta that wouldn't even be a snow day elsewhere), but not enough. My step-brother works night shift at a local hotel and they were packed with residents panicing over every little thing. My dad is maybe one of three people who even has a generator in the area..

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 04, 2018, 03:57:33 pm
Had my beer goggles on, left a bar with Pierce Brosnan & woke up with Shane McGowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 04, 2018, 04:02:55 pm
I heard that IPA's don't give you old people visions :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 04, 2018, 04:11:32 pm
Been trying IPA but there's not many authentic ones around today
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 04, 2018, 04:28:27 pm
Big in Long Beach, Houston, don't know about Vegas yet.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on January 04, 2018, 07:39:22 pm
this morning on the way to work I ran over a bunny and then at work I smashed my hand and I dropped my phone and cracked the screen  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LizK on January 05, 2018, 01:54:27 am
I had a call from My father today so say my Aunt is in an induced coma and despite the treatment 2 weeks ago the tumour has now spread to her bowel and is growing rapidly. She only has fleeting moments of consciousness none of which seem to be coherent. She is dying and I can only hope it is now swift and takes her quickly. I would be surprised if she makes it through the next few days...She has a special place in my heart and I am incredibly fond of her and certainly wish her no harm only peace....Bad news is always difficult to hear but being addressed as "fella" and "Mate" just make for another layer of hurt.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 05, 2018, 02:37:04 am
I am so very sorry to hear of this Liz  :'(

*Big Hugs*
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 05, 2018, 02:38:30 am
I had a call from My father today so say my Aunt is in an induced coma and despite the treatment 2 weeks ago the tumour has now spread to her bowel and is growing rapidly. She only has fleeting moments of consciousness none of which seem to be coherent. She is dying and I can only hope it is now swift and takes her quickly. I would be surprised if she makes it through the next few days...She has a special place in my heart and I am incredibly fond of her and certainly wish her no harm only peace....Bad news is always difficult to hear but being addressed as "fella" and "Mate" just make for another layer of hurt.

My deepest sympathies for you and your family
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 05, 2018, 02:44:38 am
Shaving

Getting Sun burnt
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on January 05, 2018, 07:33:27 am
this is a bit odd. I am not really unhappy today. I've been feeling pretty good. The odd thought keep popping in though, spoils the mood for a bit, then it moves on. So it doesn't ruin my mood, it just interrupts it.

the thought? Sadly it the thought that I am pretending, faking my way though. That I'm just a guy that wants an excuse to wear/do girly things so I'm convincing myself that there's more to it. When the thought hits, I don't feel like a girl at all. I feel like a poser, lying to myself and to the people that I care about.

Then the thought flitters away and I'm back to being comfortable and upbeat.  weird.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 05, 2018, 08:42:21 am
this is a bit odd. I am not really unhappy today. I've been feeling pretty good. The odd thought keep popping in though, spoils the mood for a bit, then it moves on. So it doesn't ruin my mood, it just interrupts it.

the thought? Sadly it the thought that I am pretending, faking my way though. That I'm just a guy that wants an excuse to wear/do girly things so I'm convincing myself that there's more to it. When the thought hits, I don't feel like a girl at all. I feel like a poser, lying to myself and to the people that I care about.

Then the thought flitters away and I'm back to being comfortable and upbeat.  weird.

Very much this for me too.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on January 05, 2018, 10:56:22 am
this is a bit odd. I am not really unhappy today. I've been feeling pretty good. The odd thought keep popping in though, spoils the mood for a bit, then it moves on. So it doesn't ruin my mood, it just interrupts it.

the thought? Sadly it the thought that I am pretending, faking my way though. That I'm just a guy that wants an excuse to wear/do girly things so I'm convincing myself that there's more to it. When the thought hits, I don't feel like a girl at all. I feel like a poser, lying to myself and to the people that I care about.

Then the thought flitters away and I'm back to being comfortable and upbeat.  weird.
I had that, eventually it ceased. I hope it does for you (and Roll).

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on January 07, 2018, 04:50:51 pm
Both of the football teams I support went out of the FA Cup this weekend, to teams in lower divisions. I went to the Aston Villa game yesterday to see us get knocked out by Peterborough, and Arsenal lost 4-2 to Nottingham Forest  :-\.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 07, 2018, 05:35:56 pm
Could be worse Sinead I follow West Ham & Blackpool
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 07, 2018, 07:51:23 pm
You don't have real football.  None of your players kneel to the flag or song :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on January 07, 2018, 07:58:46 pm
I have a good friend who is one of those extremely rare truly good people.  Super supportive of my transition, let me crash at his place while I was down visiting doctors for FFS consults, has my girlfriend and I over for thanksgiving, and has been a great friend for about 20 years.

According to another friend of mine he was needing a bit of "distraction or cheering up" today.  I thought maybe this was due to he and his wife having a hard time with getting pregnant or something (she has PCOS).

Not even close.


Stage 4 colon cancer.  Tomorrow morning they're taking out a minimum of 4" of colon, probably his gall bladder, a pile of lymph nodes, and a chunk of liver where there appears to be a metastasis.  Then 6 months minimum of chemotherapy.  The poor guy isn't even 40. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 07, 2018, 08:23:37 pm
I have a good friend who is one of those extremely rare truly good people.  Super supportive of my transition, let me crash at his place while I was down visiting doctors for FFS consults, has my girlfriend and I over for thanksgiving, and has been a great friend for about 20 years.

According to another friend of mine he was needing a bit of "distraction or cheering up" today.  I thought maybe this was due to he and his wife having a hard time with getting pregnant or something (she has PCOS).

Not even close.


Stage 4 colon cancer.  Tomorrow morning they're taking out a minimum of 4" of colon, probably his gall bladder, a pile of lymph nodes, and a chunk of liver where there appears to be a metastasis.  Then 6 months minimum of chemotherapy.  The poor guy isn't even 40.

My heart just sank  :'(   Be sure to let him know that people are thinking about him and hoping for him to pull through
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on January 07, 2018, 08:33:31 pm
   Add me to that list of those rooting for him.  Tell him there is hope. I've had cancer 3 time now and have been told it is going to kill me in a few months twice. The next time probably will. The most recent was over 3 years ago. Don't lose hope.

 Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on January 07, 2018, 08:54:17 pm
Randi texted me that she lost her pocketbook with her credit and debit cards and $200 in cash. She's in Florida with our son and isn't due back here until next weekend. Hopefully a) the pocketbook turns up mostly intact, b) her friend who she's visiting this weekend can float her a loan, or c) our son can. If none of.that pans out I'll have to try to get money to her tomorrow after I get paid. That .may mean that the electric bill doesn't get paid and potentially gets turned off.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: jaybutterfly on January 08, 2018, 08:50:42 am
I have the flu and an ear infection, so I can neither sleep nor stand up well.

Also wanting payday so I can send off for virtual ffs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Elis on January 08, 2018, 09:08:11 am
Bleeding. I'm so tempted just to rip those bits out of my body. I bloke down in tears earlier
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 08, 2018, 02:09:17 pm
Really creepy sinister guy trying to chat me up in supermarket. If I'm not  posting I'll be hanging from a meathook in a lock up!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 08, 2018, 02:18:09 pm
Would send Seal Team XI to rescue you but you removed your chip and we don't have a clue as to where you are?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 08, 2018, 02:52:19 pm
LOL, I'll probably still be in Blackpool, they tend to strike near to where they live!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on January 08, 2018, 03:22:43 pm
Really creepy sinister guy trying to chat me up in supermarket. If I'm not  posting I'll be hanging from a meathook in a lock up!

Maybe a scout for the English cricket team?

Run away!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 08, 2018, 03:59:47 pm
I was allowed to bowl underarm at school! I found cricket as much fun as a visit to the dentist
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on January 08, 2018, 04:47:24 pm
I was allowed to bowl underarm at school! I found cricket as much fun as a visit to the dentist

Same here, my idea of sports was to find a place to hide and still is.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 09, 2018, 04:34:50 am
Feeling alone, and lonely today pretty depressed in general TBH

The thought of always being alone feels pretty real to me
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 09, 2018, 08:43:29 pm
Feeling alone, and lonely today pretty depressed in general TBH

The thought of always being alone feels pretty real to me

Hi Christy, I feel you there

I often feel rather lonely and depressed

But hey, open your eyes and look around you

You are not alone, you have a whole world of friends right at your fingertips

Just start talking to folks, you can talk to me if you like

Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 10, 2018, 12:40:53 am
Hi Christy, I feel you there

I often feel rather lonely and depressed

But hey, open your eyes and look around you

You are not alone, you have a whole world of friends right at your fingertips

Just start talking to folks, you can talk to me if you like

Hugs

Thank you, im feeling abit better,  still kinda feel that, just less insecure about it as i was when i posted ^^ have been  overthinking things

Thanks for the kind words :) hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: brandyvgs on January 10, 2018, 07:18:39 pm
basically being called an idiot today with a project I spent time on doing, which is making me wanting to give up that project all together.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny94 on January 10, 2018, 10:03:42 pm
WARNING: rant about to happen.

Ugh. Words from one of those friends I might have to commute to a non-friend. One of those camp gay guys who thinks it's cool and funny to be a grown adult who makes snide comments about overweight women, ugly women, lesbians, enbies, camp straight men, trans women, and myriad other groups who haven't received the enormous bunk-up the gays have in the last twenty years. You know, them. Thinks "gay" is a personality. It was okay when he was 17, now he's 23. 

So he's got a history of trans-bashing. When I came out, he was basically okay and tried to do the pronouns. Complained about my name because it's his sister's name (for the record, I literally considered that, she's Jen and I'm Jenny, but apparently she used to be Jenny, and so sod it, I sometimes use Jen). Then this stupid facebook exchange happened (CW: extreme Britishness):

him: Does anyone else watch the voice?
me: Yeah. I liked how there was a lesbian on, but it was only briefly mentioned, rather than dwelt upon.
him: Yeah I thought so too! It wasn't like, BECAUSE I'M A FANNY LICKA
me: #some lesbians have dicks
him: do they? [bearing in mind he %^&*ing knows I'm a trans woman!!!!!]
me:...yes, if they're trans
him: [backpedalling] I actually didn't say they had fannies, just fanny lickers
well that's an awkward silence
*stupid bloody selfie [he's self obsessed]*
me: yeah dave, so as you well know, the last thing I said was in response to "do they?" not in response to "fanny lickas", which I actually found pretty funny. But since you're determined to carry on being trans-exclusionary and see me as having no sense of humour, whatever xx

him: I've never even heard the word trans exclusionary. But thanks for that.

SO if anyone read all that, which I don't expect......yes, he has a view of me as having no sense of humour, because I don't laugh at his jokes, which are mostly based on slut-shaming, fat-shaming, trans-shaming, general white privileged gay trash stuff. "I've never heard that word before" was his way of saying that excluding me and others like me was okay and didn't even warrant a word for it. Same thing as the UK media refusing to accept "cisgender" as a word.

I don't know. I'd just seen a nice tumblr post saying "This is just your friendly daily reminder that some lesbians have dicks"....and that made me feel nice.....and he just defecated all over that. Thoughtless, self-obsessed, arrogant, pathetic, childish, disloyal, misogynistic, privileged, transphobic, unintelligent, vain bloody queen.

J xx
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 11, 2018, 01:54:39 am
Jenny it's wankers like that ( & the crappy music!) why I spend so little time on the gay scene!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on January 11, 2018, 09:05:14 am
WARNING: rant about to happen.

Ugh. Words from one of those friends I might have to commute to a non-friend. One of those camp gay guys who thinks it's cool and funny to be a grown adult who makes snide comments about overweight women, ugly women, lesbians, enbies, camp straight men, trans women, and myriad other groups who haven't received the enormous bunk-up the gays have in the last twenty years. You know, them. Thinks "gay" is a personality. It was okay when he was 17, now he's 23. 

So he's got a history of trans-bashing. When I came out, he was basically okay and tried to do the pronouns. Complained about my name because it's his sister's name (for the record, I literally considered that, she's Jen and I'm Jenny, but apparently she used to be Jenny, and so sod it, I sometimes use Jen). Then this stupid facebook exchange happened (CW: extreme Britishness):

him: Does anyone else watch the voice?
me: Yeah. I liked how there was a lesbian on, but it was only briefly mentioned, rather than dwelt upon.
him: Yeah I thought so too! It wasn't like, BECAUSE I'M A FANNY LICKA
me: #some lesbians have dicks
him: do they? [bearing in mind he %^&*ing knows I'm a trans woman!!!!!]
me:...yes, if they're trans
him: [backpedalling] I actually didn't say they had fannies, just fanny lickers
well that's an awkward silence
*stupid bloody selfie [he's self obsessed]*
me: yeah dave, so as you well know, the last thing I said was in response to "do they?" not in response to "fanny lickas", which I actually found pretty funny. But since you're determined to carry on being trans-exclusionary and see me as having no sense of humour, whatever xx

him: I've never even heard the word trans exclusionary. But thanks for that.

SO if anyone read all that, which I don't expect......yes, he has a view of me as having no sense of humour, because I don't laugh at his jokes, which are mostly based on slut-shaming, fat-shaming, trans-shaming, general white privileged gay trash stuff. "I've never heard that word before" was his way of saying that excluding me and others like me was okay and didn't even warrant a word for it. Same thing as the UK media refusing to accept "cisgender" as a word.

I don't know. I'd just seen a nice tumblr post saying "This is just your friendly daily reminder that some lesbians have dicks"....and that made me feel nice.....and he just defecated all over that. Thoughtless, self-obsessed, arrogant, pathetic, childish, disloyal, misogynistic, privileged, transphobic, unintelligent, vain bloody queen.

J xx

I might be missing something but I don't see the offense in that conversation? Sure, he completely missed the point you were trying to make but it doesn't sound like he was trying to offend you. Also, if he used the word "c*ck-suckers" to describe lesbians it would not work at all lol. Don't shoot me but I think you are overreacting :embarrassed:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jenny94 on January 11, 2018, 09:23:05 am
I might be missing something but I don't see the offense in that conversation? Sure, he completely missed the point you were trying to make but it doesn't sound like he was trying to offend you. Also, if he used the word "c*ck-suckers" to describe lesbians it would not work at all lol. Don't shoot me but I think you are overreacting :embarrassed:

You're right, I looked back over that before I posted it and I thought "looks like I'm overreacting, but sod it, I'm having my rant". Take it in the context of his years of passive transphobia and this as a straw on the camel's back type thing....

And yes Kim! Haha.

J xx
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 11, 2018, 09:44:26 am
 :police:  Let's try to watch the language girls, veiled profanity does not bandage a potty mouth and just makes a person look immature not to mention that it violates the ToS

Thank you

V M
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 11, 2018, 12:28:10 pm
Heard back from the only place locally that does laser. They only have the laser once a month, and the Jan day is booked solid. Feb 23rd is their next day, but I have both heavy school (midterms) as well as my HRT followup (same day) so I can't really do that. In other words, I'm screwed until the end of march to even start hair removal locally, leaving me only with the option of driving an hour and a half (then back while in pain) while I have no reliable access to a car and am still not comfortable driving period, much less on the highway I'd have to take without adding an extra 30 minutes on backroads I don't know even as a passenger.

Very disheartened by this, I was even willing to pay what would have been a huge premium for the local convenience... but I can't wait until the end of March to even start. Was hoping to do a few expensive appointments here, then after a time or two if i was more comfortable driving and everything else do the cheaper options.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on January 11, 2018, 11:32:10 pm
Sarah/Coldheart is closing her Facebook account; and I didn't get to properly say good bye to her. :icon_cry2:

I'm going to miss our chats.  I hope she finds what she needs, and that she is well.

@Coldheart:  Remember, wherever your path may lead, I will always consider you a friend; and that I will always chat with you.  Good luck my friend, and though we may part, a piece of you will always remain in my heart.  Till we meet again!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 12, 2018, 01:10:26 am
The Gender Therapist i had all picked out and was ready to see, she met all the criteria in what i was looking for in a psychologist... retired, she is still on the website cus there in the process of restructuring it...

*sigh*
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 12, 2018, 01:38:22 am
The Gender Therapist i had all picked out and was ready to see, she met all the criteria in what i was looking for in a psychologist... retired, she is still on the website cus there in the process of restructuring it...

*sigh*

Fret not...

Something like this happened to me as well, the person I was seeing retired, but then I met another therapist who turned out to be a much better match for me and stepped things up a bit
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 12, 2018, 02:41:19 am
Thing is, i hadnt even seen or met her yet, i only rang to make my first appointment and they told me over the phone she had left which i assume meant retired because she is an older lady, and i could see no other Gender Therapist in the practice where she was working, there is another place i know but its further away *sigh*
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 12, 2018, 06:24:32 pm
The property mgmt in their fine wisdom announced that our cable TV contract is being cancelled and we have a little over a month to turn in all of our cable boxes, cords and remotes  >:(   

I don't actually watch a lot of television but there are a few programs I do enjoy

Anyway it's just one more pisser in the basket since this Fill in the Blank: ____________________________ mgmt co. took over the facility
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on January 12, 2018, 09:05:28 pm
 I feel for you V.M. we have the apartment complex sold to a new owner who hired a _________ management company too. They have changed a number of things around here such as requiring renter's insurance. They've also have come up with various rules  that they threaten 50 fines for. I've had 2 warnings myself. One for a messy back porch and the other for trash on the front door access way. For the porch I took pictures and went to the office and was told there was not problem and that they didn't know why I got the warning because my apartment was not on her list. What was the trash? A box and a package the mailman delivered. I've been here 12 -14 years and I think this will be the last. Oh if I move to another 3 bedroom so they can renovate this one will cost me another $300/mo plus a new deposit.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 12, 2018, 09:32:26 pm
Sounds like the same Dracula er, mgmt co. They want a $300 deposit for just about anything and everything

I'm surprised they haven't installed pay toilets in our own personal units yet  :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 12, 2018, 09:44:26 pm
Sounds like the same Dracula er, mgmt co. They want a $300 deposit for just about anything and everything

I'm surprised they haven't installed pay toilets in our own personal units yet  :(

VM,
From the looks of your washtub they're probably waiting for the electrician?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 12, 2018, 10:23:27 pm
VM,
From the looks of your washtub they're probably waiting for the electrician?

We have basic facilities LOL...  l just found this avatar pic. to be somewhat amusing

But the lack of privacy and the constant harassment including that of a sexual nature tend to be a bit off putting

After nearly 13 years here at my same address, I really just wish I could afford to move somewhere else   
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 12, 2018, 10:33:08 pm
We have basic facilities LOL...  l just found this avatar pic. to be somewhat amusing

But the lack of privacy and the constant harassment including that of a sexual nature tend to be a bit off putting

After nearly 13 years here at my same address, I really just wish I could afford to move somewhere else   

Oh, so the bathtub isn't your's?  Okay.  May I ask which State you live in?  I'm in Nevada since October last year and 4 year in Texas prior to that.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 13, 2018, 04:11:08 pm
I'm up a bit north of you
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 13, 2018, 06:58:38 pm
Totally kewl
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 14, 2018, 07:41:14 am
I watched a 3d video of Facial Feminization Surgery

Frak me, thats terrifying
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 14, 2018, 10:15:53 am
I watched a 3d video of Facial Feminization Surgery

Frak me, thats terrifying

Oh, yeah, that was a terrible idea. ;D

In my recent quest to reassure myself about post op SRS results looking realistic I have viewed far too many mid and immediately post surgery pictures by mistake. It is... not heartening.

By the same token, I haven't exactly been unhappy about a lot of what I've found, but I'm certainly not happy with it either... (and wasn't really today so kind of cheating) I've felt more and more like my long term is going to end up with the full range of surgeries, and it scares me. Not just the surgery itself, but the hit and miss nature of so many of the results. I'm trying to tell myself that a lot of that is people going for the cheaper surgeries in Thailand or India, since those are usually where the pictures are from, but it doesn't help the fear.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on January 15, 2018, 05:13:44 am
Well my best friend a girl that I have been seeing for 9 plus years, (she is married) Cried to me about my changes that she misses (MY NAME) she misses my voice the way I looked the way i was with here that she will Never be able to call me by my name or hear my voice again. I have explained to her that I am pretty much the same person but she is right. The problem is I really do love here so much and I know she loves me. She says she wants me to be happy and she said that her reasons where selfish, I so hate hurting her she said she cried because I went on a date she wished it could have been her I know that she does love me I know that she is grieving, I just feel so bad that I am hurting her like this again, years ago she asked me to be with her and I said no. At that time I did not think I was good enough for her and now I am hurting her again no matter what I do I hurt her. I know we just want the best for each other I have told her every plan I was making for my transition and let her be part of it I asked her if she wanted me to stop telling her and she said no that she would feel left out. I am just so confused and crying most of the night I dont know what to do. We both know that our relationship was not "right" as when we started we were both "taken" we just spent hours and hours at work together and it was like a magnet we attracted each other immediately and never let go. I told her that no matter what I want her as my best friend. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on January 15, 2018, 06:10:00 am
My work colleagues were talking about the gym and I made a Simpsons references ‘gyme? What’s a gyme? Oh, a gyme!’ & no-one understood it and called me weird, which I am *shrugs shoulders*
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 15, 2018, 07:11:27 am
Pretty down on myself tonight
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 15, 2018, 08:25:20 am
Irritated more than unhappy. Happened yesterday, completely petty and isn't a big deal, but OCD got ahold of it and now I can't let it go. This is completely worthless and I really shouldn't post it probably but venting is venting, little or big. ;D

So yesterday, my step brother asked if I wanted to grab lunch. I was struck by the intense desire for chili cheese fries (one of my personal top foods of all time from childhood, which I don't dare make at home anymore because of portion control issues), so we went to literally the only place around here with chili cheese fries, Larry's subs. They aren't great, people like them, not really sure why, I think their sandwiches except for the Cuban are pretty bad(but I do love the Cuban). But yet they have really good chili cheese fries. So I get there, and look up and see the entire menu board is new. Completely rebuilt, looks really nice with like a natural wood bordering, easier to read, etc. I mention it to the guy behind the counter we kind of know from going there, and ask if its just a new board or if the menu has actually changed any. He said "Same menu. Oh, wait, no, we took one thing off I guess." I panicked and asked "It wasn't the Cuban was it?!". My step brother just looked at me like I was and idiot and pointed out the giant posters everywhere advertising one sandwich and one sandwich alone, the Cuban. So yeah. I was relieved. Hes done ordering, so I go up to the register to order and ask for the chili cheese fries. "Oh, we don't have those anymore." I was so taken by surprise for some reason I didn't even order the Cuban. I just sort of pouted, and went and sat down and ate nothing.

There are only a tiny handful of places here that aren't super expensive (whole summer home-tourist environment), with literally only like 4 fast food places on the entire island (two of which are burger king and mcdonalds which I can't stand). I don't get a lot of variety eating out. It's pretty much just Chick-Fil-A and Subway on an infinite time loop, with a pizza thrown in every other week if I don't get invited somewhere by my dad and step mom (who then pick up the tab). To have something taken out of the equation like that is just super disheartening, particularly since I now I have no outlet for one of my three big comfort foods (mac and cheese, pizza, chili cheese fries). So yeah. Irritated.

My work colleagues were talking about the gym and I made a Simpsons references ‘gyme? What’s a gyme? Oh, a gyme!’ & no-one understood it and called me weird, which I am *shrugs shoulders*

They are just uncultured swine. Classic Simpsons references should be taught in schools.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on January 15, 2018, 09:40:40 am
My work colleagues were talking about the gym and I made a Simpsons references ‘gyme? What’s a gyme? Oh, a gyme!’ & no-one understood it and called me weird, which I am *shrugs shoulders*

I make obscure references all the time, and end up having to explain them. Mine are mostly Mystery Science Theater 3000 quotes though (which also often sub-reference a multitude of other things). I should really stop trying to explain them.... Everyone already thinks knows I'm weird.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 15, 2018, 04:11:10 pm
Can't shake this cold off
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 15, 2018, 04:14:47 pm
Can't shake this cold off

There's a whiskey cure for the cold.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 15, 2018, 04:27:06 pm
I make obscure references all the time, and end up having to explain them. Mine are mostly Mystery Science Theater 3000 quotes though (which also often sub-reference a multitude of other things). I should really stop trying to explain them.... Everyone already thinks knows I'm weird.

As a big Binge watcher
IM someone who likes to make obscure references to film or tv shows even video games, and usually no one get it

I also like characters more who do the same thing LOL Like Mack from Agents of Shield or Cisco from The Flash
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 15, 2018, 05:34:02 pm
As a big Binge watcher
IM someone who likes to make obscure references to film or tv shows even video games, and usually no one get it

I also like characters more who do the same thing LOL Like Mack from Agents of Shield or Cisco from The Flash

It is 99% of the dialogue in Psych, the greatest show of all time.

Anywho, this is actually going to be on topic!

I mentioned it in my thread for a second, but I just got invited to go get pizza. Where's the unhappy you ask? Well, I have royally sucked on my diet lately. I did so good today, only about 500 calories for lunch and it was well balanced. No snacking or splurging, nothin'. I was getting ready to put a frozen dinner in the microwave (portion control) when I was asked. I was happy, but now while waiting to go I am getting down on myself... What happened to my self control? I have lost so much weight, why for the past months can't I seem to get ahold of myself? I eat, and eat, and eat, and everytime I do right I immediately mess it up. And sure, i could order something light and lower calorie. But I know me. I'm not going to. I'm planning to, but the second I get there and I see that menu something is going to give. And there's no just one or two slices, once I eat it a bit, that's that, I eat it all. One whole pizza later I just want to curl up and die.

I'm getting very irritated with myself over it, all I want to do is get the weight off for the sake of my future, just like transitioning itself, but I keep sabotaging myself. (Not to mention devouring a whole pizza isn't exactly ladylike.)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 15, 2018, 05:56:23 pm
It is 99% of the dialogue in Psych, the greatest show of all time.

Anywho, this is actually going to be on topic!

I mentioned it in my thread for a second, but I just got invited to go get pizza. Where's the unhappy you ask? Well, I have royally sucked on my diet lately. I did so good today, only about 500 calories for lunch and it was well balanced. No snacking or splurging, nothin'. I was getting ready to put a frozen dinner in the microwave (portion control) when I was asked. I was happy, but now while waiting to go I am getting down on myself... What happened to my self control? I have lost so much weight, why for the past months can't I seem to get ahold of myself? I eat, and eat, and eat, and everytime I do right I immediately mess it up. And sure, i could order something light and lower calorie. But I know me. I'm not going to. I'm planning to, but the second I get there and I see that menu something is going to give. And there's no just one or two slices, once I eat it a bit, that's that, I eat it all. One whole pizza later I just want to curl up and die.

I'm getting very irritated with myself over it, all I want to do is get the weight off for the sake of my future, just like transitioning itself, but I keep sabotaging myself. (Not to mention devouring a whole pizza isn't exactly ladylike.)

You go Girl!  Then ride your super power generating exercise bike that powers your computer so you can tell us how great it was!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 15, 2018, 06:59:28 pm
It is 99% of the dialogue in Psych, the greatest show of all time.

Anywho, this is actually going to be on topic!

I mentioned it in my thread for a second, but I just got invited to go get pizza. Where's the unhappy you ask? Well, I have royally sucked on my diet lately. I did so good today, only about 500 calories for lunch and it was well balanced. No snacking or splurging, nothin'. I was getting ready to put a frozen dinner in the microwave (portion control) when I was asked. I was happy, but now while waiting to go I am getting down on myself... What happened to my self control? I have lost so much weight, why for the past months can't I seem to get ahold of myself? I eat, and eat, and eat, and everytime I do right I immediately mess it up. And sure, i could order something light and lower calorie. But I know me. I'm not going to. I'm planning to, but the second I get there and I see that menu something is going to give. And there's no just one or two slices, once I eat it a bit, that's that, I eat it all. One whole pizza later I just want to curl up and die.

I'm getting very irritated with myself over it, all I want to do is get the weight off for the sake of my future, just like transitioning itself, but I keep sabotaging myself. (Not to mention devouring a whole pizza isn't exactly ladylike.)

I've never seen Psych, not into procedurals ....... anyway

UMM i had Pizza last night, and also hot wings :s, i left 2 pieces of pizza tho does that count? LOL

I started thinking like that last night,  im big and i want to lose weight so i can have a bikini body, then i was like we'll you have to come out as trans first to use that bikini body, and then you have to stop eating stuff like Pizza and Chocolate Icecream or youll always be the same.... really started to spiral.. OMG it was horrible
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on January 15, 2018, 07:23:07 pm
I mentioned it in my thread for a second, but I just got invited to go get pizza. Where's the unhappy you ask? Well, I have royally sucked on my diet lately. I did so good today, only about 500 calories for lunch and it was well balanced. No snacking or splurging, nothin'. I was getting ready to put a frozen dinner in the microwave (portion control) when I was asked. I was happy, but now while waiting to go I am getting down on myself... What happened to my self control? I have lost so much weight, why for the past months can't I seem to get ahold of myself? I eat, and eat, and eat, and everytime I do right I immediately mess it up. And sure, i could order something light and lower calorie. But I know me. I'm not going to. I'm planning to, but the second I get there and I see that menu something is going to give. And there's no just one or two slices, once I eat it a bit, that's that, I eat it all. One whole pizza later I just want to curl up and die.

I'm getting very irritated with myself over it, all I want to do is get the weight off for the sake of my future, just like transitioning itself, but I keep sabotaging myself. (Not to mention devouring a whole pizza isn't exactly ladylike.)

I know how it is. If the opportunity for food comes, I go crazy. Especially if it's free. Like today, I needed to clean snow off my car & start it up & drive a bit (it's snowy & cold), so I figured 'hey, why not pick up some mexican food?'. So I did. I could have gotten a smaller meal.... I didn't. Ugh... Now to exercise!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 15, 2018, 07:27:07 pm
I know how it is. If the opportunity for food comes, I go crazy. Especially if it's free. Like today, I needed to clean snow off my car & start it up & drive a bit (it's snowy & cold), so I figured 'hey, why not pick up some mexican food?'. So I did. I could have gotten a smaller meal.... I didn't. Ugh... Now to exercise!

Go for it Girl!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 15, 2018, 08:11:04 pm
I just hate that I have no willpower when it comes to food. If I hermit myself away and no one gives me anything, I'm fine. I don't get actively hungry and go scrounging. But like just now, I got to the pizza place... somehow made myself order the salad(which, caesar so not exactly low cal, at least a lot lowER). Everyone else orders, and I just say at the end "oh, and can I get a slice of pepperoni?". At that point I'm still a little happy with myself. Just a slice, not too bad right? Well, turns out it was a massive slice that was at least 600 calories on its own if not more. And in fine form, I ate every bite. Oh, and it sucked. It sucked really bad, but I ate it anyway. That is the worst part, I didn't even enjoy it.

Another day's diet lost.

I've never seen Psych, not into procedurals ....... anyway

It's not really a procedural, it is pure comedy with absurdist mysteries. First episode is a little rough, way more serious tone than the rest of the series, but it is just a really great, charming show built on pop culture references. (Quick example: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0iD5XJcBSA (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0iD5XJcBSA) ;D)

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on January 15, 2018, 08:53:56 pm
I don't know if I feel female anymore. I definitely still don't feel male at all. I'm a bit sad I can't birth a baby. I remember it was something I loved watching on tv- people giving birth. My mother flipped out and made me change the channel when she caught me watching that show. I was a kid..

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kitty June on January 15, 2018, 09:53:19 pm
Psych, the greatest show of all time.

This!! So true. Well, mostly


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 16, 2018, 01:40:01 am
Trying to pretend I'm not depressed or contemplating
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 16, 2018, 02:33:37 am
There's a whiskey cure for the cold.

Can't get on with whiskey despite having some Scots & Irish, tried it a few times though!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 16, 2018, 03:04:06 am
Trying to pretend I'm not depressed or contemplating

*hugs*

Dont be depressed
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on January 16, 2018, 12:50:40 pm
Trying to pretend I'm not depressed or contemplating

  Hi V.M.

  (((Hug))) That is a terrible state to be in but pretending isn't good either. You know I know something of how you feel. I'm here to talk to if it will help.

 Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 16, 2018, 03:49:04 pm
What made me unhappy was that a little while ago I had this terrible feeling like "What are you doing, you can't keep this up" and this is probably the 2 or 3rd time it has happened.  I think part is that I feel nothing is happening on the HRT and I'm being foolish.

But within 20-30 minutes I have completely forgotten the episode. 

The funny thing is that I go look into the mirror and think I see myself more female.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 16, 2018, 03:53:11 pm
What made me unhappy was that a little while ago I had this terrible feeling like "What are you doing, you can't keep this up" and this is probably the 2 or 3rd time it has happened.  I think part is that I feel nothing is happening on the HRT and I'm being foolish.

But within 20-30 minutes I have completely forgotten the episode. 

The funny thing is that I go look into the mirror and think I see myself more female.

I do that a lot too. I get a random doubt, freak out over it for a second, then it all goes away and I wonder why I had the doubt.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 16, 2018, 03:56:04 pm
I do that a lot too. I get a random doubt, freak out over it for a second, then it all goes away and I wonder why I had the doubt.

Thank you El, I'm sorry that you have these experiences too but also grateful that it's not just me.  While I've been on the HRT about 1/3 of what you've been on them, I feel that when things do start to change I'll have less of those, for lack of a better word, attacks. 

Then maybe this all is just a part of the process that happens before changes begin????
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 16, 2018, 05:04:25 pm
I think a lot of folks go through the doubt process to some degree, I know I did and sometimes still do

Bear in mind that it takes at the least about a month before the HRT begins to really take effect

Everyone progresses differently so mostly it's all about patience

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 16, 2018, 05:06:27 pm
I think a lot of folks go through the doubt process to some degree, I know I did and sometimes still do

Bear in mind that it takes at the least about a month before the HRT begins to really take effect

Everyone progresses differently so mostly it's all about patience

Patience?  If I had patients I'd be a doctor!!!!!

Just a little of my warped humor - thank you VM!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on January 16, 2018, 05:43:51 pm
My dad cost me money today.

I work construction for the time being, I plan on getting out soon but I wanted to work another month or two before quitting so I can save up some good money. For the last 2 weeks I've been working with my dad at a school. Yesterday we got sent home after an hour and a half. It was -7 degrees and we were supposed to start working out on a roof but we didn't have enough materials for what we needed and also the forklift kept shutting off.

So last night my dad called me and said that he didn't hear anything from anyone about going in for today. I asked if he called and he said no and that the other 2 guys are the bosses and it's their job to call him and let us know if we were working or not today, so he said that he assumed that we weren't working. still, I told him that I really don't want to miss out on earning anymore money for the week so I told him to call and it sounded like he was going to. he calls me up at 5am today and told me to go back to bed because we weren't working. I thought nothing of it and tried to go back to sleep. then he texts me 3 hours later saying that he got a call from our boss at 7:30 because he wanted to know where we were. WE WERE SUPPOSED TO WORK TODAY!!! I asked if our boss wanted us to still go in but I guess he didn't want us too. great.

This really pisses me off, I'm trying to save up money for an apartment, I could have earned $192 today before deductions, but no, my dad had to be a stubborn brat about things. This company isn't managed very well and honestly I think my dad was trying to make a point, I think he wanted to make our bosses look bad, but I think really it just made him look bad and it hurt me financially. I don't actually have my one boss's phone #, I plan on getting it tomorrow and if I ever have any questions I'm not even going to bother with my dad.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Geeker on January 16, 2018, 06:27:30 pm
Maddie, that's a darn good reason to be unhappy.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 17, 2018, 07:07:27 am
Yesterday actually, went in to pick up my new glasses only to be told that they weren't in actually in yet  :P  Hopefully they'll be in soon, it's been a drag to be running around half deaf and blind all week
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 17, 2018, 09:18:03 am
Yesterday actually, went in to pick up my new glasses only to be told that they weren't in actually in yet  :P  Hopefully they'll be in soon, it's been a drag to be running around half deaf and blind all week

If you go mute, you'll have to change your avatar to those three monkeys :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on January 17, 2018, 05:15:44 pm
I thought you were one of the monkeys LOL
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 17, 2018, 07:57:55 pm
I thought you were one of the monkeys LOL

Now great!  Everyone knows I am one of your flying monkeys!!!!!

 :icon_tetter: :icon_tetter: :icon_tetter: :icon_tetter: :icon_suspicious: :icon_suspicious: :icon_suspicious:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: jaybutterfly on January 18, 2018, 05:40:50 am
struggled to sleep last night due to and epic blister I have on my foot that popped. Slept in late and missed all the morning.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on January 18, 2018, 07:43:20 am
It was yesterday, but....
I got called in to talk to the executive director.  I got the "we're trying to help you succeed" speech.  The one that is given right before they let you go.  I told them that I actually needed to know they're policies and procedures, because no one ever showed them or taught them to me.  They asked why I wasn't turning in a daily QA form.  I told them flat out that no one ever showed me their forms, and further told them that I still haven't received training on their phone system yet.  I haven't even been with this company 2 weeks, and the expect me to know ALL of their systems without having been shown their systems.  Now I know why I'm the fourth dietary manager in a year!

I'm looking for a new job, I'll probably get fired by this time next week. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: King Malachite on January 18, 2018, 11:51:31 am
Didn't have work due to the snow, so that means less money in my paycheck tomorrow.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on January 18, 2018, 12:23:58 pm
I can't seem to get ahold of any laser places after the first one that is probably a logistical no go. They just collectively don't pick up their phones.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on January 18, 2018, 05:01:32 pm
My lack of time management and other people constantly being obtuse and in the way.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on January 18, 2018, 08:09:56 pm
It has been two months since I had my psych eval done for surgery letters and I still haven't gotten my follow up appointment with the shrink or a letter, nor will the guy answer emails.  Unhappy doesn't even begin to cover this.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on January 18, 2018, 08:44:54 pm
  Yes Colleen that would make one more than just unhappy. Anger comes to mind but expressing it to someone you need something from before you get it could be unwise. I have a shoulder you can cry on if that helps.

Hugs,
  Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Geeker on January 18, 2018, 09:57:11 pm
I got yelled at by a co-worker that has the exact same position as I do (dock assistant, i.e. low level supervisor), for doing exactly what I was supposed to be doing and not helping him, all because he dislikes the fact that I'm younger and slightly less experienced than him and have the same amount of authority. He then sicked our boss on me for walking away instead of decking him. After explaining exactly what happen to our supervisor, he essentially told me to coddle the guy and try to be more diplomatic in the future. Irony is, he praised me for walking away and not laying the guy out in the same breath!

This isn't the first time something like this has occurred. He tends to get all sorts of special treatment because he is friends with the V.P. of operations. He has done many things that would have gotten any one else fired (causing structural damage to the building and driving a fork lift off a dock more than once just to name a couple), but, he's buddies with the ops. V.P. so... yeah.

I don't tend to be a violent person, in fact I tend to be a bit of a doormat, but he happened to stumble across one of the few things that will set me off.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on January 18, 2018, 10:13:55 pm
It has been two months since I had my psych eval done for surgery letters and I still haven't gotten my follow up appointment with the shrink or a letter, nor will the guy answer emails.  Unhappy doesn't even begin to cover this.

I would be nearly apoplectic with rage, I think. I'm sorry this is happening. Keep contacting him, put some pressure, but politely. Like Laurie said, if you upset him he may shut you out even more (which is INCREDIBLY unprofessional.....).
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on January 19, 2018, 06:05:08 am
Oh I am continuing to pester him.  I tend to be overly patient with people but even I am starting to get a short fuse about this one. 

I'm getting to the point where I'm going to look for another shrink so I can relive the joy of explaining to him that wanting SRS and FFS doesn't make me insane.  At least I didn't pay the first one up front.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Geeker on January 19, 2018, 06:20:00 am
I got yelled at by a co-worker that has the exact same position as I do (dock assistant, i.e. low level supervisor), for doing exactly what I was supposed to be doing and not helping him, all because he dislikes the fact that I'm younger and slightly less experienced than him and have the same amount of authority. He then sicked our boss on me for walking away instead of decking him. After explaining exactly what happen to our supervisor, he essentially told me to coddle the guy and try to be more diplomatic in the future. Irony is, he praised me for walking away and not laying the guy out in the same breath!

This isn't the first time something like this has occurred. He tends to get all sorts of special treatment because he is friends with the V.P. of operations. He has done many things that would have gotten any one else fired (causing structural damage to the building and driving a fork lift off a dock more than once just to name a couple), but, he's buddies with the ops. V.P. so... yeah.

I don't tend to be a violent person, in fact I tend to be a bit of a doormat, but he happened to stumble across one of the few things that will set me off.

After sleeping on it, if something like what happened yesterday happens again I'm just going to go straight to HR instead of just taking myself out of the situation until I can be calm enough to deal with him.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on January 19, 2018, 07:39:27 am
I made a big mistake at work that costs money. Not much but still, I'm very stressed out.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on January 19, 2018, 06:25:39 pm
My work wants to do my taxes for me this year.  Uh, no.  No way.  Heck no!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 19, 2018, 09:44:03 pm
My work wants to do my taxes for me this year.  Uh, no.  No way.  Heck no!

Why would your work want to do your taxes?  Just curious.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on January 20, 2018, 12:34:30 am
Why would your work want to do your taxes?  Just curious.

I worked out of the country about four months last year (seven months the year before).  I'm sure it is some complicated way of the company saving money on foreign taxes.

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on January 20, 2018, 01:48:32 am
I worked out of the country about four months last year (seven months the year before).  I'm sure it is some complicated way of the company saving money on foreign taxes.

Bari Jo

Curious.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on January 20, 2018, 01:58:52 am
A boy I went to school with was killed by a hit & run drunk driver early last year. The driver got just 3 &1/2 years
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on January 20, 2018, 07:53:34 am
A boy I went to school with was killed by a hit & run drunk driver early last year. The driver got just 3 &1/2 years

That would really make me unhappy too.  Hugs to you.

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ann W on January 23, 2018, 12:52:30 am
I never saw myself posting to this topic; but today I'm glad it's here.

I guess it's a couple of things that have got me down today. First, I'm getting my name changed (yay!), but the lawyer is taking more time than I expected to get it done. He hasn't been negligent; I know he's got more than one client, and it's only been a few days longer than I expected. But, still.

What really triggered it, however, or, perhaps, the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back, is the fact that my co-workers are not doing their jobs, I'm having to fix it and the boss doesn't seem to care. He owns several businesses and lets this one run on autopilot – or so it seems to me. It won't do any good to complain, because he never fires anyone; he values a warm body more than whether that warm body can do the job. I'm tired of it.

Finally, I came out to my sister a few months ago. We had been estranged and hadn't spoken or written in more than 10 years. To my surprise, she was very accepting and affirming; and I was thrilled. But I haven't heard from her in nearly two weeks, although I have written her many emails. I feel rejected again.

Sorry. I hate self-pity parties. But there was no one else to tell.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 23, 2018, 08:36:44 am
Crying because of not being born anatomically female

Crying because of everything i might want to/need to do to fix the universes mistake

Praying that it can happen for me..

having to pray that it can happen for me


Seeing others experiences on youtube doing the same (fixing the universes mistake)


Crying because i feel this way to begin with
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on January 23, 2018, 06:34:23 pm
Oversleeping a lot. I know I work a lot but this is ridiculous.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: AgentVermont052 on January 24, 2018, 03:24:47 am
Vent/Not Looking For Suggestions:

Woke up in the afternoon (I work overnights and sleep during the day). See I have unread emails notifying me of various bills are ready and due in a few weeks. Typical morning really no big deal as I set reminders for literally everything as I have issues with memory due to high stress.

Problems started when I read my email from my student loan servicer. My monthly payment went up again this year, it's not supposed to unless I make more during the repayment plan renewal each November. I make the same as last year and my payment increased by like $30 a month. I panic because I make so little, that $30 has to come from somewhere. Probably groceries.

Now though I am a young adult living alone, I make so little at work my parents have to supplement my income. I realize this is a privilege for me, but it's a dual edged sword. They are extremely conservative and closed minded. I am not out to them. If I do something they don't like or don't approve of (coming out to them is the big one), they'd pull their support and I'd effectively would be homeless within a month or two. Because of this fortunate but unfortunate circumstance, I can't come out yet or even start my transition. I was going to start HRT this month but can't risk my parents noticing changes over the next year. So I'm forced to stay in the closet longer than planned because I don't have a job to support myself.

So tldr (sorry I got anxious and ranted) I am unhappy today due to several bills being more than I can afford, being unable to see the doctor I want because insurance is stupid, having to postpone my transition because I'd end up homeless if I started it now, and being stuck in a crap job with an even worse boss where I don't get benefits of any kind and am treated like trash.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on January 24, 2018, 05:23:26 pm
I spent all day working on a roof in 20 degree weather.  :o
the girls were acting up too, the cold made them very sore! I couldn't exactly calm em down either while being around 3 construction guys, one of which is my dad.
I started looking for a new job last night, I really gotta find something soon.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on January 25, 2018, 02:12:27 am
My life its just SOOO BAAADDDDD, and i dont know how to dig out of that whole, and yes i know i made it myself but when life keeps making you feel like crap it makes you want to give up because i feel like its never going to change

I feel so miserable
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on February 06, 2018, 01:04:19 pm
I’m having one of those days where I’m feeling more dysphoric than usual... I’m sooo close to resorting to getting hormones privately. But I know I need laser therapy, to learn makeup and buy a full-time wig before then
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on February 06, 2018, 01:12:43 pm
Remote  key fob played up had to get a taxi to dentist as spare key at home no time to fi
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 06, 2018, 01:43:28 pm
Football season is over  :'(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: AgentVermont052 on February 06, 2018, 02:17:47 pm
I've been emailing and calling the patient representative to get an appointment with one of the only trans friendly doctors in my city and surrounding counties. This one is female and the other is male. Despite being ftm I don't trust male doctors at all. Anyway... 2 weeks, 3 emails, 2 phone calls, 3 different people, I still can't get a call back to see if 1. She's taking new patients 2. To even get an appointment in the trans health clinic at all.

Realized that my insurance denies all trans health coverage. And a lot of other potentially discriminatory things for people in need. And of all the health insurance companies available to me, for trans health to be covered, they have the most asinine and backwards requirements for things to be medically necessary to get covered.

Also wondering how I'll be able to afford a name change considering everyone is saying I'm required to have a lawyer. But my state doesn't say I need one for the court date so I'm just annoyed and confused at all this mixed information and lack of communication.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on February 06, 2018, 03:08:44 pm
Also wondering how I'll be able to afford a name change considering everyone is saying I'm required to have a lawyer. But my state doesn't say I need one for the court date so I'm just annoyed and confused at all this mixed information and lack of communication.

I have no advice about the insurance, but whoever “everyone” is, they’re wrong about needing a lawyer for name change if it’s anything like Florida. I did get help filling out the initial paperwork at a free seminar put on by a legal aid organization, but after that I did practically everything online except the fingerprinting and court date. I just represented myself.

Stephanie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on February 06, 2018, 05:38:05 pm
I am in arizona so when I changed my name, the court room was packed with others doing the same. Only one person had a lawyer with her but from what I overheard it was rather complex. She was divorced and the name change involved her child as well. I think she could have probably done it herself but she was more comfortable with a lawyer handling it.

Because my Birth Certificate was in Wisconsin, I also needed to learn the rules there as well. It would have been a bit simpler if I lived there and I could have done it without a lawyer as well. Wisconsin had a single sheet form that I would submit with my surgical letter and that was all the required paper work.

Start by googling "state name change" and you should get the state web site and instruction for a name change.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 06, 2018, 06:07:33 pm
A sharp pain in my side that nearly knocks me down then dissipates into a dull pain then I become kinda dizzy and tired and it's difficult to breath sometimes

This has been happening at random for awhile and I think about going to the Dr. but then I start feeling better and forget about it until it hits me again
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sephirah on February 06, 2018, 06:25:39 pm
A sharp pain in my side that nearly knocks me down then dissipates into a dull pain then I become kinda dizzy and tired and it's difficult to breath sometimes

This has been happening at random for awhile and I think about going to the Dr. but then I start feeling better and forget about it until it hits me again

Sweetie go get it checked out. For peace of mind if nothing else.

*big hugs*
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 06, 2018, 06:27:12 pm
Sweetie go get it checked out. For peace of mind if nothing else.

*big hugs*

Very true - VM can't be replaced!
I experienced pain like that years ago.  Was diagnosed with an ulcer and IBS.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 06, 2018, 07:06:25 pm
Sweetie go get it checked out. For peace of mind if nothing else.

*big hugs*

Very true - VM can't be replaced!
I experienced pain like that years ago.  Was diagnosed with an ulcer and IBS.

Thanks friends, I'll try to get in as soon as I can

Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on February 06, 2018, 11:47:20 pm
I came back to my car at the park and ride to find one tire was flat.  Upon inspection it was knifed, twice.  No idea why my car was targeted.

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on February 07, 2018, 02:46:14 am
Bari Jo I daren't have a car in the war zone I live. Even a POS £50 car will be vandalised. I have to keep my bike in a secure lock up 2 blocks away.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on February 07, 2018, 10:07:25 am
Bari Jo I daren't have a car in the war zone I live. Even a POS £50 car will be vandalised. I have to keep my bike in a secure lock up 2 blocks away.

ACK your living situation must be worse than mine.  I jokingly call my area a war zone, but I'm safe to park on Tue street outside and walk at night.  It probably helps that I'm blond and don't have the usual look of a gang member:)

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 07, 2018, 10:08:50 am
ACK your living situation must be worse than mine.  I jokingly call my area a war zone, but I'm safe to park on Tue street outside and walk at night.  It probably helps that I'm blond and don't have the usual look of a gang member:)

Bari Jo

Do you live in the Inland Empire?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on February 07, 2018, 10:19:11 am
Do you live in the Inland Empire?

Nope, I live in Santa Ana.  Does that peg me?  Probably:)

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 07, 2018, 10:35:54 am
Nope, I live in Santa Ana.  Does that peg me?  Probably:)

Bari Jo

I was stationed at the Helicopter base when it was in Santa Ana before the giant earthquake moved it to Tustin where it was decommissioned.

Originally from Long Beach/Lakewood, then Texas 4 years and now Vegas.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on February 07, 2018, 01:24:43 pm
My dad is so clueless. I'm 31 and have never had a girlfriend and yesterday at work in front of people he made a comment about wanting me to give him grandkids someday. NOT HAPPENING. this transition is going to come as a huge shock to him, he's oblivious.

Today we're being hit with a huge snowstorm and I got called off work, I'm trying to save for an apartment and that's a lot of money missing from my check next week, and I already have to take a day off next week because I have a session with my therapist and an electrolysis appointment. The worst part about not working today is that I got up at 4:15, ate breakfast, made coffee, got dressed, even warmed my car up! and then seriously 30 seconds before I was going to leave I got the phone call saying we're not working. I wish I would have known last night, I could have slept in!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ann W on February 08, 2018, 12:40:44 am
What made me unhappy today ...

For more than six years, I have worked full-time for a man of Indian descent in a job that requires extensive interaction with the public. Our working relationship has been stellar, and he has long regarded me as not only his best employee, but the best he has ever seen at my job. I have worked in an atmosphere of trust and positive regard.

When I suspected I was trans, almost a year ago, I knew I would want to get my ears pierced; so, when sending him a business-related email, I asked him if it would be an issue. He didn't respond. So, the next chance I had to speak to him, I brought it up. It was plain to me that it was a subject he did not want to discuss with me; he was clearly uncomfortable. I did manage to get his OK; but, later, a co-worker disclosed to me that he had said something about it to her. After this, naturally, I wondered, with some trepidation what his reaction would be to finding out I was trans.

As the months went on, I gradually came out to most of my co-workers. My relationship with dysphoria is unusual, based on what I've read other girls experience. It's there, but I managed for so long without realizing what it was that my defense mechanisms kick in automatically. I often notice it in retrospect; I see myself react to something, then realize, “Oh, that was dysphoria.” My birth name brings this out a lot, lately. I began using my new name at work before it was legal. I don't see my boss very often because of the hours I work and because he manages several businesses; so, we never discussed it. I was just getting to the point where my birth name was becoming a real trial to me, psychologically, and I needed to make the change. I used my new name on my paperwork for several weeks, and never heard a peep.

When the process began of formalizing my name change by getting a court order, I notified him by email that I would be changing my name and would update him when I had a new ID and social security card, which I thought he would need to see. No response. After I got these documents, I notified him by email. No response. Furthermore, I have begun to sense that the way he deals with me has shifted. Things that would previously have led to a phone call from him are now being communicated through an intermediary. I recently got a note from him that was, not harsh, but not as cordial as his notes have usually been for the last six years. And this is, I think, significant: the note was dictated by him to someone else who transcribed it -- someone who knows I'm trans, an ally, someone who would never address me by my birth name -- and it addressed me as [deadname]. This was obviously intentional. When I asked the person who transcribed it who had written the note, she looked uncomfortable and said she had written it as she had been told to write it. This is indicative of more than discomfort on my boss' part; it suggests hostility.

Maybe I'm being overly sensitive. Maybe I'm reading too much into this. But I'm worried. Trans is not a protected class where I live; but, while my job security does concern me, it's really the change I fear in my working environment that has me down today. I'm really down about this.

I've decided to take what I would normally consider an extreme measure. I left a message for a management-level subordinate of his at one of his other businesses, someone who has worked for him for many years, asking her to call me tomorrow. As far as I know, she doesn't know I'm trans – though who knows, with the rumor mill – and I'm going to explain the situation to her and get her feedback. Worst-case scenario, I'm going to ask her to speak to him; if he feels about me the way I suspect, I'm the last person he wants to talk to.

This just really has me down tonight, and I needed to tell someone.

P.S. It's funny about my birth name. Sometimes, now, I can barely bring myself to say it. Sometimes, I can't say it at all. For instance, when I left the message for the management-level subordinate I mentioned, the person taking the message naturally wanted to know who was calling; and, although this woman knows me by my birth name only, I couldn't bring myself to say it. I ended up just telling the person taking the message that it was the [job title] at [this other business], and saying she would know who I was. Funny, huh?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: PollyQMcLovely on February 08, 2018, 01:18:54 am
and, although this woman knows me by my birth name only, I couldn't bring myself to say it. I ended up just telling the person taking the message that it was the [job title] at [this other business], and saying she would know who I was. Funny, huh?

I too hate, have always hated my birth name even though it's a common name and perfectly acceptable to everyone else. I refuse to leave voicemails and I never create my own voicemail greetings. I developed a signature that is just an unintelligible scribble. And I prefer it when people address me by my last name only even though that's usually an indication of emotional distance. It's so nice to be able to use a name of your own choosing in RPGs.

Edit: I just finished reading the wiki entry on transgenders in India. They are known as Hijra and are basically treated very poorly as third class citizens. Perhaps your boss is of the opinion that this is okay.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 08, 2018, 01:59:50 am
Well the guy that I had my first date and kiss with has not called or text in a week now we used to text almost every night , I just wish he would have said something I don't care if he did not like me just wish he could tell me he did not want to be at least friends just make me sad and a little heart broken.  :icon_sadblinky:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ann W on February 08, 2018, 02:21:04 am
Also wondering how I'll be able to afford a name change considering everyone is saying I'm required to have a lawyer. But my state doesn't say I need one for the court date so I'm just annoyed and confused at all this mixed information and lack of communication.

This is odd. A name change is one of the simplest legal procedures there is. Some courts have pre-printed forms you can use to do it yourself; you still have to pay the filing fee, but that's about it. In some courts, the clerk will just take the paperwork in to the judge, he'll sign it, and bingo.

Some LGBT centers also provide forms and a roadmap through the process so that you can do it yourself.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 08, 2018, 08:12:55 am
Well the guy that I had my first date and kiss with has not called or text in a week now we used to text almost every night , I just wish he would have said something I don't care if he did not like me just wish he could tell me he did not want to be at least friends just make me sad and a little heart broken.  :icon_sadblinky:

Sorry to hear that! I'd like to say maybe he's just busy with something, but a week with no text doesn't sound good.  :(
You'll find someone else though, so hang in there hon!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on February 08, 2018, 08:21:09 am
Well the guy that I had my first date and kiss with has not called or text in a week now we used to text almost every night , I just wish he would have said something I don't care if he did not like me just wish he could tell me he did not want to be at least friends just make me sad and a little heart broken.  :icon_sadblinky:

Hang in there Natalie, There could be lots of reasons not related to you. Either way, you have a lot going for you don't get hung up on the first one.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 08, 2018, 09:32:00 am
I want to say thank you both Sarah_P and Faith both your words made me feel better. It is just weird I feel like a high school girl waiting for a guy to call.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 08, 2018, 09:22:28 pm
A friend of mine had to put his dog down because it became sick with an illness somewhat rare to dogs and so we're commiserating on that  :'(  He was a great lil' dog and will be greatly missed
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: EllieJune on February 10, 2018, 08:20:34 am
Today was to be my wedding day. I was going to marry a wonderful strong woman in a castle near San Diego. It was all Disney themed and everything seemed to be perfect besides... well... me.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ChrissyRyan on February 10, 2018, 08:28:01 am
A friend of mine had to put his dog down because it became sick with an illness somewhat rare to dogs and so we're commiserating on that  :'(  He was a great lil' dog and will be greatly missed


That is sad.  Dogs can be really nice friends.


Chrissy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on February 10, 2018, 10:15:47 am
Friends ' only child died suddenly at 38 leaving 4 daughters.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ChristineHaylett on February 10, 2018, 12:49:53 pm
The mirror, I rely upon it for makeup etc but it hates me so. X
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 10, 2018, 04:12:41 pm

That is sad.  Dogs can be really nice friends.


Chrissy

True, and this lil' guy had his own unique personality
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: jaybutterfly on February 10, 2018, 06:01:09 pm
very severe dysphoria today and still have my non accepting mum telling me she wants me to be happy no matter the cost...

constantly worrying that transition will never be enough to pass.

Really, really miserable
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on February 10, 2018, 07:08:34 pm
Oh gheeeze Amber,

  What a mess to clean up after clearing the drain. What a pita. Don't break those nails they are hard to get to grow back.

Hugs,
  Laurie
You haven’t lived until you’ve replaced an ejection pump. More than once. :)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on February 11, 2018, 01:40:34 am
I had a bad dream last night, i dreamt i was a child like 4 or 5 and told my father that didnt want to be a boy and that i wanted to be a girl and he didnt accept it i wonder if this explains my shame in being Transgender? i dont recall anything like this happening but idk maybe its something i repressed?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on February 11, 2018, 04:13:12 am
It’s not much fun coming round from a patch of dissociation to realise that your first job in the morning is to wash your bed linen.

It feels like such a step back, it’s literally months since my last episode, it had started to feel like a new normal. Still, leaf out of Cindy’s book. I can beat this.


Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 11, 2018, 10:37:40 am
Friends ' only child died suddenly at 38 leaving 4 daughters.

Wow, I don't know how this could have been missed and not responded to.  I am so sorry to hear that you lost your child.  My oldest is also 38 and while we aren't in contact I would be devastated if something were to happen to him.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on February 11, 2018, 10:54:17 am
I legit can't remember if I took my spiro and estrogen pills today. If I didn't then I guess I'm skipping a day because I don't want to do a double dose if I did happen to take them this morning
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 11, 2018, 11:08:20 am
I legit can't remember if I took my spiro and estrogen pills today. If I didn't then I guess I'm skipping a day because I don't want to do a double dose if I did happen to take them this morning

WIDC!!!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 11, 2018, 11:08:40 am
When In Doubt, Count!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ChrissyRyan on February 11, 2018, 11:33:39 am
When In Doubt, Count!


Ah, I see that Countess Cassi gives some advice that does add up, making good sense.


Chrissy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 11, 2018, 02:16:16 pm

Ah, I see that Countess Cassi gives some advice that does add up, making good sense.


Chrissy

Oh Chrissy Sweetie, You're making me blush  :icon_chick: :icon_peace:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 11, 2018, 02:32:12 pm
Mar car battery died and I can not fix it myself. I hate the way they built in the battery so you have to take off the passengers tire and wheel well to take the battery out and it is so cold out. I know it can be fix just was not happy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 11, 2018, 02:41:02 pm
Mar car battery died and I can not fix it myself. I hate the way they built in the battery so you have to take off the passengers tire and wheel well to take the battery out and it is so cold out. I know it can be fix just was not happy

Wow, what kind of car do you have?  A Pol 5150?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: davina61 on February 11, 2018, 03:07:00 pm
clumping about through life and not thinking about my actions (no details) think its my dyslectic brain
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 11, 2018, 03:15:52 pm
Suicidal ideation gnawing at my mind
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 11, 2018, 03:41:09 pm
Wow, what kind of car do you have?  A Pol 5150?

2002 Chrysler intrepid 3.5 RT
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 11, 2018, 03:43:08 pm
Suicidal ideation gnawing at my mind

Please don't do anything like that if you want to talk to some one I am free to talk Just please dont do anything bad please I will give you my number if you want
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 11, 2018, 04:42:18 pm
Please don't do anything like that if you want to talk to some one I am free to talk Just please dont do anything bad please I will give you my number if you want

Thank you, I'll probably be OK  :-\   It's just something that has plagued me for a long time
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 11, 2018, 04:52:10 pm
Thank you, I'll probably be OK  :-\   It's just something that has plagued me for a long time

ok I wish you the best of thoughts, I am here if you need someone to talk to, just relax and think happy thoughts
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ChrissyRyan on February 11, 2018, 05:08:45 pm
Thank you, I'll probably be OK  :-\   It's just something that has plagued me for a long time


V M,

Maybe today is a really stressful day for you and many, including me.  Envision a pleasant experience for you becoming a reality and not just a dream, and maybe that will help.

I am in a funk and am not thinking much about anything except perhaps getting some rest.  I did buy some food at the market but I just do not have any spark in me to cook or to eat.  No dinner tonight.  But I ate enough this weekend.

I am lackadaisical.  Maybe funkadaisical!

I really feel for women sharing concerns here who are going through a lot right now, from being laughed at, stared at, having relationship problems, work problems, their appearance concerns, having living arrangement issues, being zapped in the face with pain for hair removal, and so on.  Wow, that is a lot just in that short list.

Then it is encouraging to see some uplifting stories.  But the tough scenarios just claw at your heart... 

Tomorrow should be a far better day, I hope!   Always be thankful and grateful, and help someone, that helps me take the focus away from my periodic down self thinking.  But sometimes it is slow for me to respond to that even. 

Chrissy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ChrissyRyan on February 11, 2018, 05:14:17 pm
Mar car battery died and I can not fix it myself. I hate the way they built in the battery so you have to take off the passengers tire and wheel well to take the battery out and it is so cold out. I know it can be fix just was not happy


What a crappy design!  I hope the battery can be jump started easily at least even if its removal is ridiculously inconvenient to do.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on February 11, 2018, 05:22:17 pm
Mar car battery died and I can not fix it myself. I hate the way they built in the battery so you have to take off the passengers tire and wheel well to take the battery out and it is so cold out. I know it can be fix just was not happy
My car is worse. You have to take the bumper and the driver's side fender off.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 11, 2018, 05:28:03 pm
My car is worse. You have to take the bumper and the driver's side fender off.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Ya that is worse I wish it was in the back seat or trunk like some other cars I don't know why they design them like this.   

What a crappy design!  I hope the battery can be jump started easily at least even if its removal is ridiculously inconvenient to do.

Ya boosting it is usually easy just not accepting a charge or boost so I have to get it towed
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ChrissyRyan on February 11, 2018, 05:40:59 pm

Ah, I see that Countess Cassi gives some advice that does add up, making good sense.


Chrissy

Oh Chrissy Sweetie, You're making me blush  :icon_chick: :icon_peace:


Cassie,

Blush?  Oh, that is in the cosmetics aisle.  For a wonderfully healthy glow about you!   Ha.


Chrissy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 11, 2018, 08:48:22 pm
Sorry for this so I got CAA and called them up they cant replace the battery in my car or boost it so now I have to get it towed for sure now
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 11, 2018, 09:15:34 pm
A guy that's been my friend for 18 years may soon no longer be my friend (if not already). I knew he was having issues with my transition, but I never realized just how bad it was. Any mention of my progress, good things happening, or bad things happening that are transition-related just seem to set him off. I mentioned while we were all together today getting 'sir'-d by a woman at work, and he said 'You can't force your beliefs on others people'. I said I just wanted some basic human decency & politeness, and he didn't think that was right... sigh.
He also made several comments that are fairly racist. I've been hoping that maybe he'll come around, but this I think was the final straw, and I'll probably have to cut ties with him.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on February 11, 2018, 09:56:23 pm
A guy that's been my friend for 18 years may soon no longer be my friend (if not already). I knew he was having issues with my transition, but I never realized just how bad it was. Any mention of my progress, good things happening, or bad things happening that are transition-related just seem to set him off. I mentioned while we were all together today getting 'sir'-d by a woman at work, and he said 'You can't force your beliefs on others people'. I said I just wanted some basic human decency & politeness, and he didn't think that was right... sigh.
He also made several comments that are fairly racist. I've been hoping that maybe he'll come around, but this I think was the final straw, and I'll probably have to cut ties with him.

I am sorry for that Sarah that does suck, but if he is going to be negative than you are doing the right thing
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on February 14, 2018, 04:39:27 am
Feeling Miserable and also pretty frustrated with myself tonight
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Shambles on February 14, 2018, 04:57:33 am
Reciving a valantines card from my wife wih husband plastered all over it as "thats what you are" and "you havent changed yet"

I just want to scream, what so because i dont look like a girl im a man? I guess its all on appearances and it dont matter one bit whats in my head
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on February 14, 2018, 07:29:35 am
Had a couple of sad days, I was reminded of my ex's existence which triggers me, and also I was frustrated thinking about all things transition related I need to change and how slow everything moves.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on February 14, 2018, 11:56:43 am
Well, a few hours ago would have been the very existence of this holiday. But I'm kinda over that thanks to some encouragement. Instead, what made me really unhappy is when I walked downstairs and saw the ungodly amounts of fudge that I'm sure my step mother bought to hand out to everyone. I'm desperately trying to lose weight (gotta drop 30 pounds by July... for reasons... :D) and thousands of calories of fudge sitting around with my lack of self control when it comes to food is a very bad thing.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on February 14, 2018, 11:58:18 am
Well, a few hours ago would have been the very existence of this holiday. But I'm kinda over that thanks to some encouragement. Instead, what made me really unhappy is when I walked downstairs and saw the ungodly amounts of fudge that I'm sure my step mother bought to hand out to everyone. I'm desperately trying to lose weight (gotta drop 30 pounds by July... for reasons... :D) and thousands of calories of fudge sitting around with my lack of self control when it comes to food is a very bad thing.

I had Christmas fudge given to me, happens every year, I took it to work to have it eaten and I would avoid it. Well, um, I ended up eating half of it at work .. plan fail :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 14, 2018, 01:39:08 pm
Well, a few hours ago would have been the very existence of this holiday. But I'm kinda over that thanks to some encouragement. Instead, what made me really unhappy is when I walked downstairs and saw the ungodly amounts of fudge that I'm sure my step mother bought to hand out to everyone. I'm desperately trying to lose weight (gotta drop 30 pounds by July... for reasons... :D) and thousands of calories of fudge sitting around with my lack of self control when it comes to food is a very bad thing.

In addition to left-over cheesecake, a coworker brought in doughnuts today. Plus there were left-over valentine's cookies from this morning's storytime. I don't even want to know how many calories I've had today....
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Michelle_P on February 14, 2018, 02:57:48 pm
It's Valentines Day, the anniversary of the clubbing and beheading of an Italian priest, which we somehow celebrate by exchanging paper heart cutouts with preprinted sentiments and equally cloying bad chocolate candies.

I'm trying to figure out how to spend my evening.  Alone in the apartment, or should I dress to the nines and go out for solo dining?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: amberwaves on February 14, 2018, 05:26:53 pm
Got pulled over for speeding on my way to an appointment.  Got 2 tickets one for the speeding, the second for not having updated my license.  Damn near $300 between the both of them.  Then on the drive back from said appointment I finally succumbed to the illness running around my household.  Managed to only have to stop once to vomit on the side of the road.  Now I get to spend Valentine's very near the bathroom and continually arguing with my body about not wanting to use said bathroom.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on February 14, 2018, 05:46:46 pm
I've been unhappy not just today, but pretty much the whole weekend. I AM SICK AND TIRED OF BEING THE GHOST OF MY WIFE'S HUSBAND! Ahem, sorry for the screaming. She loves me, and supports me, but she won't touch me or kiss me anymore. I love her, I don't want anyone else!... And it hurts me to see her cry because I'm not who she thought I was. I'm not looking for suggested solutions, just commiseration.

Even though the town has asked us to conserve water, I'm gonna go soak in a hot tub of bubbles.
I'm in a very similar situation. Me and my partner are still together. She is trying to support me. But the romantic part of relationship died 7 months ago. ( Mostly my fault. ).....I hope things will get better for you and your wife...... hugs !!!



Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 14, 2018, 05:52:47 pm
I'm going to be at home doing nothing for Valentine's yet again. Sigh. Maybe next year?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on February 14, 2018, 09:59:49 pm
I'm in a very similar situation. Me and my partner are still together. She is trying to support me. But the romantic part of relationship died 7 months ago. ( Mostly my fault. ).....I hope things will get better for you and your wife...... hugs !!!



Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk
Well, that's a really old post, and things have gotten a little better, but we still live together in separate rooms, no cuddling or kissing and "not a couple" although the hard work of being a couple is still there. Today is just about the hardest day to deal with in this situation.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on February 15, 2018, 09:04:37 am
Ok, this is not high on the list of unhappy moments but ....

I just stubbed my big toe on the stairs @work. I am wearing open toed sandals, red velvet painted nails and, it just tore half the nail off .... OWWWWWW .....

It's going to take forever for it to grow back out to get shaped properly :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 15, 2018, 09:19:57 am
Ouch and ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 15, 2018, 11:44:34 am
Ok, this is not high on the list of unhappy moments but ....

I just stubbed my big toe on the stairs @work. I am wearing open toed sandals, red velvet painted nails and, it just tore half the nail off .... OWWWWWW .....

It's going to take forever for it to grow back out to get shaped properly :(

Ouch!!

I had yet another fingernail break this morning. I swear, if they grow more than a 1/2 mm out they just break. Why can't my toenails do that? My 2 big toenails are ingrown and I could probably actually get them cut completely back if they were that brittle. Maybe all the biotin I'm taking is going directly to my toes? I hope some of it is helping my hair, too.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on February 15, 2018, 11:52:42 am
Well, one good thing about the fact people always kind of half-assed Valentines Day for me in the past means I can half-ass it now. Or forget about it completely.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on February 15, 2018, 10:27:18 pm
I mentioned in the happy thread I stopped and actually looked at women's clothes in Sam's Club, and that I was going to try again at Target. Well, I went over there, and I faltered. Faltered hard. I was surprised by the number of people there at that time of day on a Thursday, a group of employees were gathered around the dressing room entrance just talking... and I couldn't go through with it. I made a complete loop of the store, picked up some groceries to try to build my courage back up, then went back. Not many people around, so I looked at one or two things near the aisle, sort of mumbling to myself like I was trying to remember someone else's size. Got scared, and stopped. Went to men's section, grabbed a pair of jeans (believe it or not I own no jeans, period, male or otherwise) that were somewhat androgynous and a pink-ish generic t-shirt, but that's the most I could do. Unfortunately, the shirt doesn't look good on me color wise, and was more just a desperate attempt to salvage something mentally... I'm so mad at myself for not finding the courage, and just really sad because I honestly thought going over there I would be coming home with a pair of women's jeans at the least.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on February 15, 2018, 10:42:11 pm
I mentioned in the happy thread I stopped and actually looked at women's clothes in Sam's Club, and that I was going to try again at Target. Well, I went over there, and I faltered. Faltered hard. I was surprised by the number of people there at that time of day on a Thursday, a group of employees were gathered around the dressing room entrance just talking... and I couldn't go through with it. I made a complete loop of the store, picked up some groceries to try to build my courage back up, then went back. Not many people around, so I looked at one or two things near the aisle, sort of mumbling to myself like I was trying to remember someone else's size. Got scared, and stopped. Went to men's section, grabbed a pair of jeans (believe it or not I own no jeans, period, male or otherwise) that were somewhat androgynous and a pink-ish generic t-shirt, but that's the most I could do. Unfortunately, the shirt doesn't look good on me color wise, and was more just a desperate attempt to salvage something mentally... I'm so mad at myself for not finding the courage, and just really sad because I honestly thought going over there I would be coming home with a pair of women's jeans at the least.

 Ellie Ellie Ellie

  Girl I know exactly what you mean. I waited for around Christmas for a lot of years to go "Looking for a clothing gift" for a woman in my life... Me. It is indeed scary to go into the no man's land of women's clothing and look around. I now can do it but would you believe I had never tried on a piece of women's clothing until I went to a women's boutique get together with Michelle? I tried on  5 tops and bought none. I have yet to do it on my own.  You'll get there Hun. It is just going to take some time. you need to find a girlfriend to go do it with.

Hug,
   Laurie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 15, 2018, 10:56:54 pm
It is just going to take some time. you need to find a girlfriend to go do it with.

This! Would your sister be willing to go with you sometime?
I can't even count the number of times I did the exact same thing! Even if you know in your mind that it's no big deal, it's hard to get over that emotional anxiety about it. I will say this - now that I shop in the women's section exclusively, I've actually noticed quite a few solo men looking there, too. I have no idea if they're there for themselves or are buying a gift, and I really don't worry about it. Well, unless they try to take something I want.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TonyaW on February 15, 2018, 11:28:49 pm
I mentioned in the happy thread I stopped and actually looked at women's clothes in Sam's Club, and that I was going to try again at Target. Well, I went over there, and I faltered. Faltered hard. I was surprised by the number of people there at that time of day on a Thursday, a group of employees were gathered around the dressing room entrance just talking... and I couldn't go through with it. I made a complete loop of the store, picked up some groceries to try to build my courage back up, then went back. Not many people around, so I looked at one or two things near the aisle, sort of mumbling to myself like I was trying to remember someone else's size. Got scared, and stopped. Went to men's section, grabbed a pair of jeans (believe it or not I own no jeans, period, male or otherwise) that were somewhat androgynous and a pink-ish generic t-shirt, but that's the most I could do. Unfortunately, the shirt doesn't look good on me color wise, and was more just a desperate attempt to salvage something mentally... I'm so mad at myself for not finding the courage, and just really sad because I honestly thought going over there I would be coming home with a pair of women's jeans at the least.
A trick I used to do was grab a couple of big shirts from the men's department and used them to sandwich the stuff I really wanted to try on.  Some places they want to know how many you have but they just count the hangers.   
 

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 15, 2018, 11:54:32 pm
Well, one good thing about the fact people always kind of half-assed Valentines Day for me in the past means I can half-ass it now. Or forget about it completely.

Stated just like a true man!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on February 16, 2018, 09:01:06 am
Unfortunately, I don't have any friends in the area, much less female friends to go with. :/ I'm still working up to being dressed around my sister. (First thing I did though when I got home is asked her about the pinkish shirt on me. She concurred, didn't really work with my skin tone despite a lot of people saying the pastel pinks would.)


A trick I used to do was grab a couple of big shirts from the men's department and used them to sandwich the stuff I really wanted to try on.  Some places they want to know how many you have but they just count the hangers.   


Unfortunately as well, they were being thorough about what you took into the dressing room yesterday. They usually aren't, sometimes it is even completely unattended.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on February 18, 2018, 06:51:28 am
I’M SO TIRED OF EVERYONE AROUND ME TELLING ME TO WAIT TO GET HORMONES ON THE NHS (which could take up to 3 years) INSTEAD OF GETTING THEM PRIVATELY. THEY SEEM TO THINK I WANT TO GO ON HORMONES RIGHT NOW (which isn’t the case) BUT I’M NOT WILLING TO WAIT 3 YEARS TO GO ON THEM, ESPECIALLY AS I KNOW I WILL BE READY FOR THEM LONG BEFORE I GET THEM THEOUGH THE NHS

*sorry for caps, it’s just been pissing me off, lol
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on February 18, 2018, 07:24:00 am
This was the other day I went to get prescription glasses, or at least look at them. The salesperson, as nice as she was, directed me to the men's section. I get it, she was basing it on how I'm presenting, but I thought prior that people staring at me literally everywhere I go meant something was up (I'm changing). Apparently I need my head checked.

It's not being misgendered (questionable since I was I was in "guy" mode) that bothers me. I should've just went to the women's glasses. It's my $$ they want in the end. Instead I told her I'll look online. Which is true but still feels like a fail.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on February 18, 2018, 07:29:24 am


I’M SO TIRED OF EVERYONE AROUND ME TELLING ME TO WAIT TO GET HORMONES ON THE NHS (which could take up to 3 years) INSTEAD OF GETTING THEM PRIVATELY. THEY SEEM TO THINK I WANT TO GO ON HORMONES RIGHT NOW (which isn’t the case) BUT I’M NOT WILLING TO WAIT 3 YEARS TO GO ON THEM, ESPECIALLY AS I KNOW I WILL BE READY FOR THEM LONG BEFORE I GET THEM THEOUGH THE NHS

*sorry for caps, it’s just been pissing me off, lol

Yeah 3 years is way too long. Heck I thought my 1 month wait was long. I remember when you first started posting about realizing you're trans and that you wanted to wait to start hrt. I actually admire you wanting to take your time. But I guess for me I'd been crossdressing for over a year before accepting I'm trans.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on February 18, 2018, 08:49:47 am

Yeah 3 years is way too long. Heck I thought my 1 month wait was long. I remember when you first started posting about realizing you're trans and that you wanted to wait to start hrt. I actually admire you wanting to take your time. But I guess for me I'd been crossdressing for over a year before accepting I'm trans.

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It just shows complete ignorance from them, and it’s coming from the ones I love the most. On one hand, I fully understand what they’re saying, I shouldn’t rush into anything, but they seem to miss the part where I say (repeatedly I might add) “I’m not saying I’m going to go on hormones right now, but I am not waiting 3 years for them”, I think that sounds very fair if I’m being perfectly honest, because if I really wanted to, I’d be on them right now.

I would go on them right now if I’m being completely honest, but I know myself that I’m not ready for that yet, I still have a lot I have to do, but these things are currently in place or are close to being started, there’s no way, that once I have mastered make-up, am living part time at least and start referring to myself as Sinead, that I’m gonna spend however long it is twiddling my thumbs waiting on the NHS. It could be years of my life, if I’m being honest, I sort’ve feel like I’ve wasted 25 years of my life already, not exploring my femininity
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on February 18, 2018, 10:36:34 am


It just shows complete ignorance from me, and it’s coming from the ones I love the most. On one hand, I fully understand what they’re saying, I shouldn’t rush into anything, but they seem to miss the part where I say (repeatedly I might add) “I’m not saying I’m going to go on hormones right now, but I am not waiting 3 years for them”, I think that sounds very fair if I’m being perfectly honest, because if I really wanted to, I’d be on them right now.

I would go on them right now if I’m being completely honest, but I know myself that I’m not ready for that yet, I still have a lot I have to do, but these things are currently in place or are close to being started, there’s no way, that once I have mastered make-up, am living part time at least and start referring to myself as Sinead, that I’m gonna spend however long it is twiddling my thumbs waiting on the NHS. It could be years of my life, if I’m being honest, I sort’ve feel like I’ve wasted 25 years of my life already, not exploring my femininity

I know girl. It's not easy. Even on hrt it's a lot of waiting. I'm struggling with managing the dysphoria. I'm scared that if I go fulltime I'll be traumatized by being misgendered. Part of me wants to know I can pass before I invest in this which is hard.

By the way makeup is too expensive! Another reason I just want hrt to do what it does so I don't need as much

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Mariah on February 18, 2018, 09:22:55 pm
Having to put our cat midnight down do to a tumor. Hugs
Mariah
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 19, 2018, 07:43:15 pm
Went to electrolysis today, and looked at my 3 days of facial hair growth in the mirror. Seeing that's bad enough, but I noticed a LOT more dark hairs than there were a month ago. Looks like the laser treatments backfired on me, so now I'll have more to burn through at the electrocutioner. Sigh...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on February 21, 2018, 12:30:50 am
I feel so silly saying this... I was upset myself immediately after my roommate offered to help me and I told him "no I got it". I feel like I'm pushing him away... I don't even know if he likes me...

We don't talk much anyway. I shouldn't have feelings but he's so good looking and "around". It's so hard not to! I wasn't prepared for this. I thought I'd avoid all guys until I after I full transition! What a huge fail...

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie on February 21, 2018, 12:40:11 am
 I actually drove an hour to my county justice building to pick a new name change form to see what it requires now since the new law took affect this past January. It was closed for weather. Arrg
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 21, 2018, 10:16:13 am
I've been getting my name changed various places, and had almost forgotten about my car insurance. So I called up Progressive, and also mentioned that I'm legally female now, too. Because of the gender change they raised my rates $25 / 6 months!!!  :icon_anger:
Apparently I'm officially a crazy woman driver?! Aren't I supposed to do my nails in the car?  While texting? :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on February 21, 2018, 10:18:16 am
I've been getting my name changed various places, and had almost forgotten about my car insurance. So I called up Progressive, and also mentioned that I'm legally female now, too. Because of the gender change they raised my rates $25 / 6 months!!!  :icon_anger:
Apparently I'm officially a crazy woman driver?! Aren't I supposed to do my nails in the car?  While texting? :P

pffft ... everyone knows that you can't do your nails and text, you'll mess up your nails. facial makeup is ok for multitasking
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on February 21, 2018, 10:28:38 am
pffft ... everyone knows that you can't do your nails and text, you'll mess up your nails. facial makeup is ok for multitasking

Plus you’d get polish all over the screen. I do limit the makeup to powder and lipstick while driving. Eyeliner not recommended!


 - Stephanie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on February 21, 2018, 10:34:39 am
Plus you’d get polish all over the screen. I do limit the makeup to powder and lipstick while driving. Eyeliner not recommended!
 - Stephanie

absolutely, how would you drive if you poked your eye out??!!?? Good point
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 21, 2018, 04:07:34 pm
I just turn on the cruise control! Then I can do whatever. You don't even have to touch the wheel!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: PollyQMcLovely on February 21, 2018, 07:59:40 pm
I don't really have any friends or family but there is a group of people I'm friendly with that I see in Central Park while walking the dog. One of them is trans and I have been looking forward to telling her I started HRT. Today was a glorious day in NYC so I went down there and I was hoping we'd have a nice chat, maybe have lunch and I'd have someone to share with. So I tell her and she says Lemme know how that goes, and walks off. She wasn't being inconsiderate or anything I don't think. It was a let down and a hard reality check. A reminder that even though I'm still an egg with only a month and a half of HRT behind me I need to be careful to temper my expectations. That even if I get the SRS I desire so much that there's a good chance I'll still just spend all day in bed. That no matter how what I do I'll never be a real person.

tl;dr First person I told that I started HRT barely acknowledged me.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on February 21, 2018, 09:29:57 pm
I don't really have any friends or family but there is a group of people I'm friendly with that I see in Central Park while walking the dog. One of them is trans and I have been looking forward to telling her I started HRT. Today was a glorious day in NYC so I went down there and I was hoping we'd have a nice chat, maybe have lunch and I'd have someone to share with. So I tell her and she says Lemme know how that goes, and walks off. She wasn't being inconsiderate or anything I don't think. It was a let down and a hard reality check. A reminder that even though I'm still an egg with only a month and a half of HRT behind me I need to be careful to temper my expectations. That even if I get the SRS I desire so much that there's a good chance I'll still just spend all day in bed. That no matter how what I do I'll never be a real person.

tl;dr First person I told that I started HRT barely acknowledged me.

I'm sorry that happened to you, but don't let it get you down. If it was me I would have been happy for you (I am!) and given you a big hug. Here, have a virtual ::HUG::! :icon_hug:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Steph2.0 on February 21, 2018, 09:53:35 pm

tl;dr First person I told that I started HRT barely acknowledged me.

People can be strange for any number of reasons. I’m just pulling thoughts out of the air, but it could be something like she’s so fragile that she feels her uniqueness is being threatened by an “egg.” Or maybe she can’t afford or was denied HRT. Or maybe she just had a bad day. It’s a shame she couldn’t bring herself to be supportive, but she’s only one person with her own problems. Don’t forget all your sisters and brothers here who are joyful for you.


 - Stephanie
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: PollyQMcLovely on February 21, 2018, 10:03:18 pm


People can be strange for any number of reasons.
 - Stephanie

I'm not mad at her at all. It was presumptive of me to think I could just spring that on a person. She's good people.

Thanks for the kind words.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on February 22, 2018, 04:49:59 am
Reports of fishing hooks hidden in dog toys.I hope they're caught and made to chew one
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: jaybutterfly on February 22, 2018, 04:54:02 pm
Work cut my hours down to 4 hours after I applied for a job and didnt get it. Hilariously because without putting it on the job description or application pack, my boss told me 'youre the prime candidate but we only want a lady for the role, which you are not.' Now Im pissed off enough as is that I lost out, but him saying that was a double slap he didnt realize. Him saying that too me though has confirmed 2 things to me.

1. I dont want to work there.
2. Im actually within my rights to threaten legal action after Im told the only reason I didnt get it was because of whats between my legs. Im writing to the head office of our area and leaving a note at the bottom that if there is no action on this (which is against the equality act of 2010) I will be taking it to the very top of the organisation and may whatever god or cosmic forces are out there help the entire Fylde Coast branch of the YMCA if that happens. They can either settle or I will do my utmost to bleed them of ever bit of money I can. Im fuming.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 22, 2018, 05:08:43 pm
Work cut my hours down to 4 hours after I applied for a job and didnt get it. Hilariously because without putting it on the job description or application pack, my boss told me 'youre the prime candidate but we only want a lady for the role, which you are not.' Now Im pissed off enough as is that I lost out, but him saying that was a double slap he didnt realize. Him saying that too me though has confirmed 2 things to me.

1. I dont want to work there.
2. Im actually within my rights to threaten legal action after Im told the only reason I didnt get it was because of whats between my legs. Im writing to the head office of our area and leaving a note at the bottom that if there is no action on this (which is against the equality act of 2010) I will be taking it to the very top of the organisation and may whatever god or cosmic forces are out there help the entire Fylde Coast branch of the YMCA if that happens. They can either settle or I will do my utmost to bleed them of ever bit of money I can. Im fuming.

Wow!!! That does suck!!! That's like a bop on the head and a kick butt at the same time, I'd be pissed too
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: jaybutterfly on February 22, 2018, 06:10:40 pm
Wow!!! That does suck!!! That's like a bop on the head and a kick butt at the same time, I'd be pissed too

I was about to ask 'well what about your other minorities' but that would involve outing myself to the company and one of them I know is a transphobe (if youre a man, be a man its that simple, is something I have heard him say when hes out of earshot of one of our transgender members) and I dont think I would be allowed to keep working there
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TonyaW on February 23, 2018, 08:12:38 am
Seeing him in the mirror the last two days.
WTF?.  Wednesday I felt great and even put up a pic in the Fabulous thread.  Last two days I've absolutely hated the mirror.
 
Added medroxyprogesterone to the HRT last week but think it's too soon to blame that.

Maybe it's time to color my hair again, roots are starting to show

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jessica on February 23, 2018, 01:11:32 pm
That I can’t stop tearing up, and I don’t want to talk about it.  Both of those I’m sad about.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sephirah on February 23, 2018, 02:03:09 pm
That I can’t stop tearing up, and I don’t want to talk about it.  Both of those I’m sad about.

*gives you a big hug*

I hope you feel better soon, sweetie. Really I do.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cindy on February 23, 2018, 03:45:12 pm
That I can’t stop tearing up, and I don’t want to talk about it.  Both of those I’m sad about.

Now young lady enough of that nonsense. As Sephirah said BIG HUG and you know I'm here for you at any time.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jessica on February 23, 2018, 07:17:11 pm
Thank you Sephirah and Cindy 💕💕
I do feel much better!

Not so tearful Jess
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on February 23, 2018, 09:17:39 pm
A pimple on my nose! I'm 58! WTF?

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on February 24, 2018, 04:01:01 am
Feeling consumed by loneliness and neglect   
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on February 24, 2018, 04:39:10 am
I’m sorry hon, I’ve been a bit busy, you know you can always message me.

Today was the day after therapy. I’m having to write them off in all respects, because I sleep. At the table, in a chair, on the couch, on the floor, almost by any door - it’s hitting me around the park, quietly. Today, alone I’ve slept for well over 15 hours....

Shattered and broken.

Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jessica on February 24, 2018, 10:21:19 am
VM .....Rowan.... I hope you both feel better.  We all have a bond with each other through Susan’s and need a hand and support sometimes from one another.  I’m here for you anytime you need me.

Hugs, Jessica
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on February 24, 2018, 02:28:49 pm
Hi Jessica,

I’m ok mainly, I’ve therapy every fortnight - it takes me two weeks to get to a place where I can face it again - it’s only the last couple of sessions that I have been able to identify the “post therapy day” problem - I can have a reasonable nights sleep, and yet be completely unable to stay awake for significant periods of the day after - so it must be doing something... lol. I’m also using it as a guage to remind myself that although I’m feeling ‘better’ that I still actually have a long way to go...

(Hugs)


Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 24, 2018, 02:49:43 pm
Feeling consumed by loneliness and neglect

Sorry - hope you feel better.  Not a good time to tease you about your iguana :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jessica on February 24, 2018, 03:04:57 pm
Hi Jessica,

I’m ok mainly, I’ve therapy every fortnight - it takes me two weeks to get to a place where I can face it again - it’s only the last couple of sessions that I have been able to identify the “post therapy day” problem - I can have a reasonable nights sleep, and yet be completely unable to stay awake for significant periods of the day after - so it must be doing something... lol. I’m also using it as a guage to remind myself that although I’m feeling ‘better’ that I still actually have a long way to go...

(Hugs)


Rowan

Does therapy trigger emotions that you have about yourself and you have a hard time justifying those feelings?  What brings you to the point of continuing therapy on schedule?
I can only surmise that if your feeling down and feeling like sleeping all the time.  It may be depression.  Going to somewhere and hearing from yourself how you feel and not finding resolution can be taxing on the psyche.  If this is the case, talk to your doctor about methods or medication to help.  If it’s not, discuss this sleep pattern with him and work out a plan for helping with that.
You can PM me anytime your feeling down or just want to say hi!

Smiles, Jess
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on February 24, 2018, 03:18:39 pm
A pimple on my nose! I'm 58! WTF?

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

It's called Booperty!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on February 25, 2018, 12:54:45 pm
Hi Jess, I’m on meds, and yes, all is in general ‘ok’ - which is a lot better than the “not good” of the previous months.


Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on February 25, 2018, 09:14:36 pm
In my hands is $200 cup of coffee from H&R Block.   See they didn't tell us that we were ineligible, for the free 1040EZ, until our taxes were finished. Now we are going to have nearly $200 in fees taken out of my return. ( Including a $12 retirement savings tax credit that cost us 25 bucks. ) .... God bless America.

To make this even sweeter, some creepy dude was hitting on my partner, after we told him that we were married, I then got warned that there were plenty of military guys in this area. I brushed it off, but I'm not naive to what that means....

Oh well. Lots of lessons learned today. (https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20180226/8ddd760ef371e5d78d0251316a07c707.jpg)

Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Maddie86 on February 26, 2018, 03:45:22 pm
I woke up really sick today. I had to call into work for the first time since 2006 and I can't really afford to be doing that right now. Then I got a notification in the mail that my pharmacy is changing to a different store and since my insurance doesn't cover HRT idk if that means my prices will go up. Then on top of all that my record player stopped working, it's only 2 years old!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on March 01, 2018, 10:02:14 am
Last night I was playing with my dog off leash in the courtyard like I do every night.  When my neighbor came home he ran to her door since loves her. I visited with the neighbor for about five minutes in her gallery.  I left my dogs leash in the courtyard during.  Coming back out I notice somebody took it.  Really!  A dogs leash!  WTF!  I would be less mad, but this is the 2nd time this has happened.  I am so down on my community right now it's not healthy

Bari Jo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 01, 2018, 10:22:48 am
Last night I was playing with my dog off leash in the courtyard like I do every night.  When my neighbor came home he ran to her door since loves her. I visited with the neighbor for about five minutes in her gallery.  I left my dogs leash in the courtyard during.  Coming back out I notice somebody took it.  Really!  A dogs leash!  WTF!  I would be less mad, but this is the 2nd time this has happened.  I am so down on my community right now it's not healthy

Bari Jo

Are any of your neighbors into bondage?  >:-)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Bari Jo on March 01, 2018, 10:24:35 am
Are any of your neighbors into bondage?  >:-)

You mean besides me?

:)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Devlyn on March 01, 2018, 06:09:02 pm
People have lost their ability to extend greetings.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Chloe on March 01, 2018, 07:41:33 pm
Forth time fix (repairclinic.com) for 25yr old washing machine: $70
Septic tank pump: $310

Am now $380 poorer . . . could've bought full set of house batteries /OR/ another solar panel for upcoming summer AC!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jessica on March 01, 2018, 07:56:30 pm
People have lost their ability to extend greetings.

Devlyn Marie, I would like to greet you the land of apathy.  It’s full of souls that just try to make it from day to day.  The local news is headlining the traffic jam of self absorbed gobots that’s just inside waiting for you. 
Though if you prefer, step next door to the land of empathy!  You won’t be lacking in greetings.
But please before you enter there, try to reach into that land of “my, me, mine” and grab ahold of anyone you can reach, to show them there are others.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 01, 2018, 10:52:47 pm
Sadly, my daughter will be flying to Long Beach tomorrow to attend the funeral of the father of her girlfriend.  Anyway, at the last minute I was "tasked" with compiling a cd of his favorite songs to be played during and after the service.  Anyway, we went to one of the Station casinos here in Vegas and received our free bottles of Malibu Rum (Casinos tend to have giveaways for locals every week).

Afterwards, we went to a Walgreens to buy some blank cds so I could burn the songs onto them.  As I was paying for the CDs, my daughter went to check out the fingernails and I met her there a few minutes later.

I have no problem looking at the stuff even as a "Male" though I have been called "Babe" a couple of times.  Anyway, while we're checking out the nails I see a product that you buy and place on your boobs that covers the nipples so you supposedly don't have to wear a bra.  Hummmm, never colors too, lol.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 01, 2018, 10:54:19 pm
In my hands is $200 cup of coffee from H&R Block.   See they didn't tell us that we were ineligible, for the free 1040EZ, until our taxes were finished. Now we are going to have nearly $200 in fees taken out of my return. ( Including a $12 retirement savings tax credit that cost us 25 bucks. ) .... God bless America.

To make this even sweeter, some creepy dude was hitting on my partner, after we told him that we were married, I then got warned that there were plenty of military guys in this area. I brushed it off, but I'm not naive to what that means....

Oh well. Lots of lessons learned today. (https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20180226/8ddd760ef371e5d78d0251316a07c707.jpg)

Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk

You seriously need to contact your local newspaper or news station.  That's BS and you are victims.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sno on March 02, 2018, 03:54:30 am
Cassi,

You’re so right, $200 coffee in a plastic cup... crime of the century.

Ids98498, that’s terrible hon, really awful :(

Rowan
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 02, 2018, 10:02:44 am
Forth time fix (repairclinic.com) for 25yr old washing machine: $70
Septic tank pump: $310

Am now $380 poorer . . . could've bought full set of house batteries /OR/ another solar panel for upcoming summer AC!

My washing machine died to waiting for a repairman to come back as the one they sent said I dont know this machine and left. My shower tap broke I fixed that myself although I have now learned I have become ditsy myselfI dont know why but I have I think it is coming out more and more now. :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on March 02, 2018, 11:20:27 am
My dieting has collapsed, and I don't know why. I just eat and eat and can't seem to stop myself. I wake up every morning thinking today I'm getting back on track, then nope! Something goes off. Yesterday it was needing to pick up my dad's car for him, which happened to be parked by Huddle House in a sales lot. (Huddle House is a waffle house esque diner chain, I know not everywhere has them.) Well, I had a really great coupon so I thought great, I'll grab a cheap meal. The problem then was I ordered my cheap meal (a lean burger with a small amount of fries, not health food but not horrible), then also ordered some limited edition oreo pancakes they have. That are 1000 calories. And weren't even very good. But I ate them anyway. This morning it was my step brother asking me if I wanted to order pizza. I was going to eat a 250 calorie frozen dinner, but the pizza was just too tempting and I broke down and ordered it. Annnnnnnnnnnnd then ate the whole thing. So that was 2000 calories instead of 250. And its barely past noon.

I want to just cry, I am so down on myself for not keeping up with the diet. Losing a good bit of weight by summer means a lot to me, but I just can't seem to get myself back on track no matter how motivated I am.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on March 02, 2018, 12:34:23 pm
My dieting has collapsed, and I don't know why. I just eat and eat and can't seem to stop myself. I wake up every morning thinking today I'm getting back on track, then nope! Something goes off. Yesterday it was needing to pick up my dad's car for him, which happened to be parked by Huddle House in a sales lot. (Huddle House is a waffle house esque diner chain, I know not everywhere has them.) Well, I had a really great coupon so I thought great, I'll grab a cheap meal. The problem then was I ordered my cheap meal (a lean burger with a small amount of fries, not health food but not horrible), then also ordered some limited edition oreo pancakes they have. That are 1000 calories. And weren't even very good. But I ate them anyway. This morning it was my step brother asking me if I wanted to order pizza. I was going to eat a 250 calorie frozen dinner, but the pizza was just too tempting and I broke down and ordered it. Annnnnnnnnnnnd then ate the whole thing. So that was 2000 calories instead of 250. And its barely past noon.

I want to just cry, I am so down on myself for not keeping up with the diet. Losing a good bit of weight by summer means a lot to me, but I just can't seem to get myself back on track no matter how motivated I am.

Dieting is really hard. Being hungry all the time is one of the most difficult things to get used to. Yesterday I dropped by Sonic at lunch time to grab a limeade, since it was happy hour. I ended up getting a rt 44 size one, along with a burger, tots, and an oreo cheesecake shake.  :eusa_doh:

It's hard enough driving by some place that sounds really good, but friends and family are seriously the worst when you're dieting. They'll always tempt you with wonderfully delicious foods that are jam-packed with calories. The woman I live with is always making some extravagant meal, including a large portion for me. I've stopped trying to do my own meals (I feel bad about wasted food, and if I don't eat it, she'll toss it). I do keep some fairly low-calorie frozen meals around for the rare days when she's too tired to cook anything, though.
I'd suggest telling people that you're dieting, and ask them not to tempt you with things like pizza. I know it doesn't always work, but it may at least cut down on the temptations.
I wonder if I could make a device linked to my phone's GPS that would shock me anytime I tried to pull into a fat-food place (that was a typo, but I chose to keep it  :D ).
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on March 02, 2018, 01:02:55 pm
Dieting is really hard. Being hungry all the time is one of the most difficult things to get used to. Yesterday I dropped by Sonic at lunch time to grab a limeade, since it was happy hour. I ended up getting a rt 44 size one, along with a burger, tots, and an oreo cheesecake shake.  :eusa_doh:

It's hard enough driving by some place that sounds really good, but friends and family are seriously the worst when you're dieting. They'll always tempt you with wonderfully delicious foods that are jam-packed with calories. The woman I live with is always making some extravagant meal, including a large portion for me. I've stopped trying to do my own meals (I feel bad about wasted food, and if I don't eat it, she'll toss it). I do keep some fairly low-calorie frozen meals around for the rare days when she's too tired to cook anything, though.
I'd suggest telling people that you're dieting, and ask them not to tempt you with things like pizza. I know it doesn't always work, but it may at least cut down on the temptations.
I wonder if I could make a device linked to my phone's GPS that would shock me anytime I tried to pull into a fat-food place (that was a typo, but I chose to keep it  :D ).

Part of the problem is that I'm surrounded by enablers who don't even have a clue what they are doing while attempting to be nice, so its not even like I can yell at them or hate them for it (plus its my own problem to begin with). If I'm only eating stuff I buy, its pretty healthy. Sure, I'll splurge at the store and get a snack I shouldn't, but that's gone in a day or two. But for example, my step mother showed up for my birthday last week with two cakes. TWO CAKES. For 5 people! Plus ice cream! And then my sister trying to be sweet and make up for a disaster during Christmas, got me a big thing of holiday peanut butter cups and oreo candy bars (which are the same density of calories as a stick of butter). And then I also got one of those monthly import snack boxes. That... was too much candy and cake. And I ate it all. See, sweet and thoughtful, but really terrible for dieting. :/ My sister and dad can eat anything and not put on weight so all they do is keep junk food around without a second thought, my step mother is tiny but she will just feed everyone else until they die(over buys desserts for parties, etc.), and my step brother has a severe weight problem with not a single care to change it. So it's not a great environment in which to diet at all, particularly when your major issue is just willpower to begin with. If food is put in front of me (including just on a menu), I eat it, simple as that. If it's not, I don't think much about it and go through the day fine without craving it except the occasional pizza.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 02, 2018, 01:25:59 pm
Part of the problem is that I'm surrounded by enablers who don't even have a clue what they are doing while attempting to be nice, so its not even like I can yell at them or hate them for it (plus its my own problem to begin with). If I'm only eating stuff I buy, its pretty healthy. Sure, I'll splurge at the store and get a snack I shouldn't, but that's gone in a day or two. But for example, my step mother showed up for my birthday last week with two cakes. TWO CAKES. For 5 people! Plus ice cream! And then my sister trying to be sweet and make up for a disaster during Christmas, got me a big thing of holiday peanut butter cups and oreo candy bars (which are the same density of calories as a stick of butter). And then I also got one of those monthly import snack boxes. That... was too much candy and cake. And I ate it all. See, sweet and thoughtful, but really terrible for dieting. :/ My sister and dad can eat anything and not put on weight so all they do is keep junk food around without a second thought, my step mother is tiny but she will just feed everyone else until they die(over buys desserts for parties, etc.), and my step brother has a severe weight problem with not a single care to change it. So it's not a great environment in which to diet at all, particularly when your major issue is just willpower to begin with. If food is put in front of me (including just on a menu), I eat it, simple as that. If it's not, I don't think much about it and go through the day fine without craving it except the occasional pizza.

I totally understand what you are saying one of the girls I work with she can eat anything and everything she eats a whole bag of chips every night and weighs 120 pounds and is 5'8 I am 5'7 165 pounds I dream to be her weight. See we take turns and cook for each she can eat 4 times what I can. I am at the point where it seems that I look at food and I gain weight. I have been trying to loose weight to. She always says well one will not hurt you so I know about enabling it is hard but even if you are just loosing a pound a week that is still great.  I am wishing you the best and hope you can loose the weight you want.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: MollyPants on March 02, 2018, 03:28:30 pm
I totally understand what you are saying one of the girls I work with she can eat anything and everything she eats a whole bag of chips every night and weighs 120 pounds and is 5'8 I am 5'7 165 pounds I dream to be her weight. See we take turns and cook for each she can eat 4 times what I can. I am at the point where it seems that I look at food and I gain weight. I have been trying to loose weight to. She always says well one will not hurt you so I know about enabling it is hard but even if you are just loosing a pound a week that is still great.  I am wishing you the best and hope you can loose the weight you want.
My partner is like that. She can eat the same amount as me despite being literally half my size and it's an achievement of she puts on weight. Consequently she doesn't have any need to be careful with what she eats and dieting is like impossible if you have to cook for two every night :(

Sent from my Nexus 5X using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 02, 2018, 03:45:43 pm
Well I saw my aunts and uncles on my fathers side today for the first time in 2 years. What I thought could be a good experience turned out that. I have one aunt that will still talk to me and love me and the rest can go shove it. 10 more people are now out of my life we were never close so it does not hurt as much.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: meatwagon on March 02, 2018, 07:12:24 pm
extremely rude customer today at work.  I was putting up a cart, he called out my name (it's on the name tag), and when I looked up, he said "you ain't no Kenny, you know you a girl.  you're pretty," and then he walked out.  just bafflingly uncalled for on so many levels i don't even know where to start.

also, having a fever because the pharmacy can't get their stuff together and get me my sinus meds already.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ChrissyRyan on March 02, 2018, 07:18:22 pm
Well I saw my aunts and uncles on my fathers side today for the first time in 2 years. What I thought could be a good experience turned out that. I have one aunt that will still talk to me and love me and the rest can go shove it. 10 more people are now out of my life we were never close so it does not hurt as much.


I am glad you have that nice aunt.

Chrissy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 02, 2018, 07:35:33 pm
extremely rude customer today at work.  I was putting up a cart, he called out my name (it's on the name tag), and when I looked up, he said "you ain't no Kenny, you know you a girl.  you're pretty," and then he walked out.  just bafflingly uncalled for on so many levels i don't even know where to start.

also, having a fever because the pharmacy can't get their stuff together and get me my sinus meds already.
Sometimes people just suck. I get that every once in awhile too at work. Sometimes people never out grow the school yard bully routine.  Just don't acknowledge them anymore than your job requires you too. If their mission is to invalidate who you are, then they failed big time, because they don't get to decide who you are.

Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 02, 2018, 08:52:18 pm
You seriously need to contact your local newspaper or news station.  That's BS and you are victims.
Still trying to figure out the right person to complain to. I'm not one that likes to get confrontational.( I am actually afraid of both being confrontational and being in confrontations if that makes any sense.) But I don't want to just give away $200 either.

Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 02, 2018, 08:53:32 pm
Cassi,

You’re so right, $200 coffee in a plastic cup... crime of the century.

Ids98498, that’s terrible hon, really awful :(

Rowan
When they asked me if I wanted another cup of coffee, I said heck yes. For that money I should have took the coffee maker too . ( Just kidding. )

Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 02, 2018, 09:23:21 pm
Still trying to figure out the right person to complain to. I'm not one that likes to get confrontational.( I am actually afraid of both being confrontational and being in confrontations if that makes any sense.) But I don't want to just give away $200 either.

Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk

Call the City Desk at your local newspaper.  Explain your story and I'm sure they connect you with someone and try your local news station.  Nothing shakes a questionable tax preparer than coming under the microscope of media.  You could also contact the Internal Revenue Service and report their practice.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ann W on March 03, 2018, 10:24:56 am
I totally understand what you are saying one of the girls I work with she can eat anything and everything she eats a whole bag of chips every night and weighs 120 pounds and is 5'8

Don't you just want to tie her down and drip water on her forehead with an eyedropper for like, oh, two weeks, until she goes stark raving insane?

I'm replying to the thread, not to your post in particular; but I had to say that, and also that your avatar is stunning.

I work part-time at an all-night convenience store that sells pizza and subs on the side. My job is night shift in the deli section. I'm by myself all night, and I've got so much to get done that every little interruption turns my night upside-down. It's very stressful. Well, the person who relieves me is very exacting. She's very good at her job, knows my job just as well, is in good with the boss ... and she's not happy with me, because I don't perform to her satisfaction. Now, I know I'm relatively new. I started in November, and I only work two days a week. Maybe she's not being unfair; I don't know. But I'm one of those people for whom a kind word is very motivating, and lack of a kind word is devastating. I've always been more motivated by praise than anything else. Last night was hell -- well, to be honest, most nights are no picnic -- and, as usual, when my relief came in she treated me like you-know-what.

I was stuck there, with her, for another hour to an hour-and-a-half, because I still had duties to perform. I tried to speak with her pleasantly when she came in, and she barely acknowledged me. I just knew she hated me, hated following me, etc. I continued doing what I had to do, and I was on the verge of tears (estrogen; this has been happening a lot lately). Yes, it was validating; but, on the other hand, I was ready to quit my job over this.

I was miserable. Then, the assistant manager on duty came up to me and we talked. I told him how I felt, and he gave me some important feedback and information. It was nice.

Is this what men do? Take charge and manage? If so, how comforting. I like being made to feel safe, in my emotional upheaval. Truth is, I always have -- no surprise there (d-uh).

Anyway ... a rough day, with a few silver linings.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 03, 2018, 07:01:33 pm
Kind of mixed feelings.  Earlier today I decided to stop by the local VFW just to get out of the apartment without going and blowing money at a casino.

Anyway, as I was brushing my hair (comb no good anymore), I looked at myself and realized that face was really changing.  Kinda awkward, male-female but I had my glasses and baseball cap so I went.  Last time I had a drink that contained alcohol was a couple of beers on Thanksgiving.  Anyway, I went and had two beers.  I didn't know anyone so it's an uneventful event.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 03, 2018, 07:23:40 pm
Don't you just want to tie her down and drip water on her forehead with an eyedropper for like, oh, two weeks, until she goes stark raving insane?

I'm replying to the thread, not to your post in particular; but I had to say that, and also that your avatar is stunning.

I work part-time at an all-night convenience store that sells pizza and subs on the side. My job is night shift in the deli section. I'm by myself all night, and I've got so much to get done that every little interruption turns my night upside-down. It's very stressful. Well, the person who relieves me is very exacting. She's very good at her job, knows my job just as well, is in good with the boss ... and she's not happy with me, because I don't perform to her satisfaction. Now, I know I'm relatively new. I started in November, and I only work two days a week. Maybe she's not being unfair; I don't know. But I'm one of those people for whom a kind word is very motivating, and lack of a kind word is devastating. I've always been more motivated by praise than anything else. Last night was hell -- well, to be honest, most nights are no picnic -- and, as usual, when my relief came in she treated me like you-know-what.

I was stuck there, with her, for another hour to an hour-and-a-half, because I still had duties to perform. I tried to speak with her pleasantly when she came in, and she barely acknowledged me. I just knew she hated me, hated following me, etc. I continued doing what I had to do, and I was on the verge of tears (estrogen; this has been happening a lot lately). Yes, it was validating; but, on the other hand, I was ready to quit my job over this.

I was miserable. Then, the assistant manager on duty came up to me and we talked. I told him how I felt, and he gave me some important feedback and information. It was nice.

Is this what men do? Take charge and manage? If so, how comforting. I like being made to feel safe, in my emotional upheaval. Truth is, I always have -- no surprise there (d-uh).

Anyway ... a rough day, with a few silver linings.

Hi AnnMarie2017 , I want to say thank you, you made me smile. Is there a head manager there? Do you live in a place that has harassment and bulling laws, here in Ontario it is part of our Health and Safety act. You can look into the laws where you live and advise you mangers.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ann W on March 03, 2018, 08:44:01 pm
Is there a head manager there? Do you live in a place that has harassment and bulling laws, here in Ontario it is part of our Health and Safety act. You can look into the laws where you live and advise you mangers.

There are protections in place; but, although I think this kind of thing does qualify as bullying, it's passive rather than aggressive. She's not actively trying to make my job more unpleasant; she just isn't going out of her way to hide the way she feels. Too, she is very well thought-of by the powers-that-be, and, from what I can gather, for good reason. A good worker who knows her job. In addition, this is the first place I worked as me; when I got hired, even before my name changed, I came out as trans and asked to go under my real name, and they were very accommodating. So, I really don't want to rock the boat here. Maybe if I had been here longer, I might be more vocal; but I don't want to be seen as a problem, regardless of my rights. This place is hard on everyone, including the managers. Very stressful.

I'm just glad the assistant manager on duty talked with me today. He was one of the first to make an effort to gender me correctly and treat me like a girl.  :) It was very comforting.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ann W on March 06, 2018, 12:15:21 am
I came here to post this, and discovered I've posted more than once in this topic over the last several days. I feel ... self-involved, and self-indulgent. Do yourself a favor and just skip over this post; I just needed to vent. I'll try not to do it again for awhile.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

I'm glad this topic is here. Even if no one reads this, it's good to have some place to express it.

Today started out wonderfully well; I was in the best mood I've been in for a long time. Then, when I wanted to put on my eye makeup, the applicator was gone. It's been downhill ever since.

I know my apartment is a disaster area. What with working seven days a week and dealing with the aftermath of my name change, when am I going to find the time to clean? Yesterday – you won't believe this. I have two Visa cards with a specific, major bank. Although the same bank manages both accounts, I sent full documentation for each account separately. There were no wrinkles; my name was changed on both accounts and I have received my new credit cards. It's a major bank, after all.

Then I went to the website to pay my bill – and it deadnamed me. I called the bank. The regular customer service people were helpless; they transferred me to their computer people. Their computer people told me I would have to take proof of my name change into my local branch in order to get my name changed on the website. Now, I have had a credit card with this bank for nearly 10 years, and not once have I seen the inside of a branch. The nearest branch of this particular bank, major though it is, is more than 100 miles from me and in a different state. I have already demonstrated the legitimacy of my name change to this company; are you telling me that the left hand can't talk to the right hand?

When I said something like this to the computer person, I was told there was nothing else they could do. I was transferred back to customer service. When this customer service representative also told me there was no alternative, I asked to speak to a supervisor. When the supervisor got hold of it, things began to change; and, believe me, it was no picnic for her, either. I spent a number of minutes on hold and then came into a three-way conversation in which the supervisor explained matters to a supervisor in the computer section. This second supervisor acknowledged that the problem was theirs, not mine, but told me it was going to take 1-2 days to fix and she would have to refer it to their problem solvers. That's where things ended.

This is the kind of thing I've gone through a number of times now. Apparently, many systems just aren't set up to handle our situation. And each one takes precious time to address. This adventure took nearly an hour.

So, my apartment is a pig sty. Nevertheless, I keep my eye makeup applicators in one place and one place only in my apartment, because they're dirty with makeup: on a paper towel, on top of the microwave in the kitchen. I never put them anywhere else, because I don't want makeup all over the place; I have enough problems keeping the bathroom clean as it is. Today, I went to the kitchen to get the applicator – and it wasn't there. This experience was only a little less disorienting than discovering that the earth really is flat after all. Putting my eye makeup applicator on top of the microwave is almost a natural law, like gravity.

This is the kind of thing that makes you wonder if you're got early-stage Alzheimers. I actually looked in the refrigerator. I was freaking out. I didn't find it, so no eye makeup at work today; and, after wasting time looking for it, in my haste to get out the door I forgot to put on lipstick. And my hair was particularly uncooperative today. All-in-all, today started off brilliantly, then took a sharp nosedive descent into Purgatory. Please, Day; get better.

I stopped on the way to work to get lunch and bought a small bag of M&Ms. I don't know what your experience has been, but since HRT chocolate has become a richer, fuller experience for me. When I was able to take a minute at work, I savored my way through the bag. M&Ms are one of the best readily-available confectionery experiences on the planet; I think I'm going to start carrying a bag in my purse for emergencies – a nice antidote for a meltdown.

Thank you, topic, for giving me a place to post this without feeling like a narcissistic windbag.

So, that was my day. How was yours?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 06, 2018, 12:22:36 am
Plain or Peanut?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Ann W on March 06, 2018, 12:40:58 am
Plain or Peanut?

Peanut, every time.

I'm not knocking Plain. They're good, and I once ate some in desperation (no Peanut available). I don't look down on people who prefer them.

But I'm a Peanut girl. Oh, yum.  ;D
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 06, 2018, 12:45:40 am
Peanut, every time.

I'm not knocking Plain. They're good, and I once ate some in desperation (no Peanut available). I don't look down on people who prefer them.

But I'm a Peanut girl. Oh, yum.  ;D

Personally, I would have said I was a nut girl :)  Actually, I agree.  The peanut ones tend to last longer while you're figgiting the peanut pieces :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on March 06, 2018, 06:48:28 am
Peanut, every time.

I'm not knocking Plain. They're good, and I once ate some in desperation (no Peanut available). I don't look down on people who prefer them.

But I'm a Peanut girl. Oh, yum.  ;D

Good choice! Peanut is decidedly superior. You can also tell yourself that they're good for you, since the peanuts are a source of protein.  ;D
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on March 06, 2018, 11:15:17 pm
Peanut Butter > Peanut/Plain/Caramel/Pretzel/Etc.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: PollyQMcLovely on March 06, 2018, 11:56:32 pm
I found out today that the only person I've told didn't keep it a secret like I asked her to and when I came home I discovered that my roommate had poked around my room, even moving my bed to look behind it. I don't know for sure if the two are related but it doesn't seem too farfetched.

I feel bad only posting this today because I'm not contributing meaningfully to the forum. I do appreciate that I can come here and write down the above, it's as close as I get to confiding in a friend or what have you.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 07, 2018, 12:58:52 am
I found out today that the only person I've told didn't keep it a secret like I asked her to and when I came home I discovered that my roommate had poked around my room, even moving my bed to look behind it. I don't know for sure if the two are related but it doesn't seem too farfetched.

I feel bad only posting this today because I'm not contributing meaningfully to the forum. I do appreciate that I can come here and write down the above, it's as close as I get to confiding in a friend or what have you.

Sorry about your privacy issue being dishonored.  And as far as I'm concerned helping each other here is key so feel safe.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Jessica on March 07, 2018, 09:59:03 am
I found out today that the only person I've told didn't keep it a secret like I asked her to and when I came home I discovered that my roommate had poked around my room, even moving my bed to look behind it. I don't know for sure if the two are related but it doesn't seem too farfetched.

I feel bad only posting this today because I'm not contributing meaningfully to the forum. I do appreciate that I can come here and write down the above, it's as close as I get to confiding in a friend or what have you.

I’m so sorry your trust was betrayed.  I would have a serious talk with your roommate about invasion of privacy.
I hope you feel that we at Susan’s can be trusted.  You are wanted and needed here, even if you just read the experiences of others.  Join in when you feel you can.  Sometimes things just are overwhelming and all you feel you can do is listen.

Hugs, Jessica
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 09, 2018, 10:07:47 pm
Well the guy I was talking to and was going to meet in a few weeks said he really wanted to meet me so since I was of this weekend I would pay for his bus ticket to come down today I was all excited and left work early took a shower went to go pick him up at the bus terminal and found out he stood me up I feel a little heart broken I thought we had so much in common and he was so happy to talk to me. Now I called him and his number is out of service. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 09, 2018, 10:12:49 pm
Well the guy I was talking to and was going to meet in a few weeks said he really wanted to meet me so since I was of this weekend I would pay for his bus ticket to come down today I was all excited and left work early took a shower went to go pick him up at the bus terminal and found out he stood me up I feel a little heart broken I thought we had so much in common and he was so happy to talk to me. Now I called him and his number is out of service.

And he cashed in the ticket?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 09, 2018, 10:19:44 pm
And he cashed in the ticket?

Yes he sent me a pic of him on a bus I think he is a scam artist
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 09, 2018, 11:41:56 pm
Yes he sent me a pic of him on a bus I think he is a scam artist

Sorry you had to experience this.  Sadly, before letting Cassi out I was on POF and every now and then I'd get some young woman trying to hook up with me.

Never fell for anything though.  It can be tough, and con artists know which buttons to push.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 10, 2018, 12:14:13 am
Yes he sent me a pic of him on a bus I think he is a scam artist

@ natalie.ashlyne:  I am so very sorry that you got taken advantage of in that way.... there are many untrustworthy men and women creeps out there always eager to scam trusting souls like yourself.   I bet that you won't do that kind of thing again. I am certain that you are aware that it could have been worse.  I am very glad that you are OK.
....Please be more cautious in the future. 
hugs,
Danielle   .....   formerly Aspiringperson
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: MollyPants on March 10, 2018, 01:24:39 am
Work has been pretty tough recently. I'm leaving later this year to change careers but I've got another 5 months to go which just seems like forever.

Sent from my Nexus 5X using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 10, 2018, 12:45:28 pm
Work has been pretty tough recently. I'm leaving later this year to change careers but I've got another 5 months to go which just seems like forever.

Sent from my Nexus 5X using Tapatalk

@ MollyPants:
  So sorry to read about your tough job situation recently...  for your own sanity it is good that you are planning to change careers later this year.... but for now, just be very glad that you have a job in these difficult economic times.
Wishing you the best,
Danielle   ... formerly Aspiringperson
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 10, 2018, 12:46:49 pm
Well, I'm unhappy because my almost newest best friend, Appy, disappeared and was apparently kidnapped by pod people and I miss her!

In short!  Unhappy bout Appy!!!!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on March 11, 2018, 08:35:09 am
Plain or Peanut?
Peanut. It’s a weak spot for me as are crunchy Cheetos. Haven’t had them in over 8 months though.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 11, 2018, 02:00:10 pm
Peanut. It’s a weak spot for me as are crunchy Cheetos. Haven’t had them in over 8 months though.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

Been doing Blue Diamonds here, lol. 
Almonds, not LSD
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on March 11, 2018, 02:26:18 pm
Well, my landlady's dead.

I disliked her, since she treated me much worse than any of the other tenants, but I didn't particularly want to read that she'd died this morning. Funeral's tomorrow. Doubt I would be welcome showing my face there anyway, but I might pass by. Death shouldn't fail to make an impression and an improvement for the people left, whoever it is. Whenever it happens, it does make me think, and maybe something worthwhile comes out of that for me, I don't know.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 11, 2018, 02:40:29 pm
I wish a couple of my creepy neighbors would fall over dead... I'd throw a party  :eusa_dance:

Speaking of creepy neighbors, this guy got all up yelling and calling me names, he told me I was an a-hole and so I said
"Thank you, I do my best"
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 11, 2018, 04:07:18 pm
I wish a couple of my creepy neighbors would fall over dead... I'd throw a party  :eusa_dance:

Speaking of creepy neighbors, this guy got all up yelling and calling me names, he told me I was an a-hole and so I said
"Thank you, I do my best"

Was this the parcel steal'n guy?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 11, 2018, 04:16:02 pm
Was this the parcel steal'n guy?

How did you guess? I'm wondering where I can buy a custom made voodoo doll that would actually work  8)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 11, 2018, 04:16:58 pm
Breathing

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 11, 2018, 04:22:27 pm
Well, I'm unhappy because my almost newest best friend, Appy, disappeared and was apparently kidnapped by pod people and I miss her!

In short!  Unhappy bout Appy!!!!!!

@ Cassi:   "Appy" is here!    ....   I was Shanghi'ed and taken to Alaska and they changed my name...
Oh by the way... I kind of liked that you nick-named me Appy.
Danielle ....  formerly Aspiringperson  aka: Appy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 11, 2018, 04:25:11 pm
@ Cassi:   "Appy" is here!    ....   I was Shanghi'ed and taken to Alaska and they changed my name...
Oh by the way... I kind of liked that you nick-named me Appy.
Danielle ....  formerly Aspiringperson  aka: Appy


@ Cassi... oh and I added YOU to my "Buddy List"
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 11, 2018, 04:30:40 pm

@ Cassi... oh and I added YOU to my "Buddy List"

Oh, I'm soooooooooooooooooo delighted and happy to see you!!!!!

And I'm glad you like "Appy".  From my own experience it takes a while to come to terms with a name.  Think Cassi was my 3rd attempt as when I signed on I was CalDudette, but honestly it seems sooooooooooooooo long ago:)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 11, 2018, 04:56:19 pm
Oh, I'm soooooooooooooooooo delighted and happy to see you!!!!!

And I'm glad you like "Appy".  From my own experience it takes a while to come to terms with a name.  Think Cassi was my 3rd attempt as when I signed on I was CalDudette, but honestly it seems sooooooooooooooo long ago:)

@ Cassi:  When I first signed up on here I was a little apprehensive so I tried to choose a member name that seemed appropriate at the time.... but now, I am very comfortable being here so I just changed it to my real name... makes it easier for me!!!
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 11, 2018, 04:59:25 pm
@ Cassi:  When I first signed up on here I was a little apprehensive so I tried to choose a member name that seemed appropriate at the time.... but now, I am very comfortable being here so I just changed it to my real name... makes it easier for me!!!
Danielle

Like totally understand :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 11, 2018, 05:12:28 pm
Um, like... This is the "Unhappy" thread  ::)  We do also have a happy thread LOL
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 11, 2018, 06:17:49 pm
Um, like... This is the "Unhappy" thread  ::)  We do also have a happy thread LOL

Thank you VM - I still love you too!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 11, 2018, 06:57:32 pm
Does anyone else get the 'Daylight Savings Time' blahs? Feel like I've been dragging my tail all day

Plus I woke up with a cold  :P  Maybe that's why I feel so blah
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on March 11, 2018, 07:12:26 pm
I am definitely missing that hour of sleep right about now.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 12, 2018, 12:18:20 am
Daylight Stealing Time.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 12, 2018, 12:18:59 am
Does anyone else get the 'Daylight Savings Time' blahs? Feel like I've been dragging my tail all day

Plus I woke up with a cold  :P  Maybe that's why I feel so blah
Get better and geet rid of yur kold.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Christy Lee on March 12, 2018, 12:23:47 am
Does anyone else get the 'Daylight Savings Time' blahs? Feel like I've been dragging my tail all day

Plus I woke up with a cold  :P  Maybe that's why I feel so blah

Feel better :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 12, 2018, 01:59:20 am
I had to it too. Stayed home all day. . It was beautiful day out too. I saw it from my window.

Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 12, 2018, 11:24:33 am
All you sickies get better and do it now!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 12, 2018, 11:31:19 am
All you sickies get better and do it now!

Cassi:   I have been quite fortunate lately and not getting sick and not getting the flu or even a bad cold. 
Every morning I have been drinking 1 or even 2 big glasses of V8 Juice (2 servings of vegetables and 140% of Vitamin C and only 50 calories per serving) and take a few multi-vitamins along with my HRT meds.   
So far, so good..... plus I like V8 Juice.... I am aware that there are many that do not but that is OK.
Appy   aka: Danielle  formerly Aspiringperson
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 12, 2018, 11:35:34 am
Cassi:   I have been quite fortunate lately and not getting sick and not getting the flu or even a bad cold. 
Every morning I have been drinking 1 or even 2 big glasses of V8 Juice (2 servings of vegetables and 140% of Vitamin C and only 50 calories per serving) and take a few multi-vitamins along with my HRT meds.   
So far, so good..... plus I like V8 Juice.... I am aware that there are many that do not but that is OK.
Appy   aka: Danielle  formerly Aspiringperson

I'm glad to hear that you're okay and I like V8 myself - use to like it more with volka in it, lol.

I think the worse I've been was in January 2017.  I flew from Houston to Long Beach to visit family I hadn't seen in 3 years and got sick, stayed sick, and continued to be sick for three more weeks when I returned to Texas.  Even lost my voice, lol - to some people total happiness :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 12, 2018, 11:36:26 am
Feel better :)

Christy Lee, sweetheart, you need visine.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Artesia on March 14, 2018, 08:16:35 am
Stephen Hawking died.  :icon_cry2:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: CallMeKatie on March 14, 2018, 11:22:30 am
That a young, pretty and humourously self deprecating woman fancied a bit of a chat as we worked but my mind defaulted back to self defence mode, up went the barricades, armed guards posted and turret manned.
Excuses made, ran off and hid for a bit.

Goodness me it's everything about me that's messed up,not just transgenderness
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on March 14, 2018, 03:49:52 pm
I've barely slept in the last few nights. I think last night I got maybe an hour? Probably not even that. This stupid cough keeps waking me up, usually just at the moment I'm about to drift off. I never imagined an illness could be so sadistic...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 15, 2018, 03:01:14 am
More snow!!!  :P  What I thought to be a simple cold seems to keep getting progressively worse, woke up and could hardly breath

I'm sure it will clear up eventually but right now I'm hatin' on being a miserable gurgling yuck n' muck monster  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 15, 2018, 12:24:38 pm
More snow!!!  :P  What I thought to be a simple cold seems to keep getting progressively worse, woke up and could hardly breath

I'm sure it will clear up eventually but right now I'm hatin' on being a miserable gurgling yuck n' muck monster  :P

Had to get up on a chair to get to the AC intake vent to check out the AC Filter.  Wouldn't even make a good Eclipse viewer because not even sunlight could get through it.  Ended up taking the vacujum which I luckily repaired last week and cleaned it up.

Just in time for daughter to insanely run the AC because it was 75 degrees upstairs - Almost froze up cute button nose off and wake up to heater being left on.

Sniffles all morning :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 15, 2018, 01:39:03 pm
Had to get up on a chair to get to the AC intake vent to check out the AC Filter.  Wouldn't even make a good Eclipse viewer because not even sunlight could get through it.  Ended up taking the vacujum which I luckily repaired last week and cleaned it up.

Just in time for daughter to insanely run the AC because it was 75 degrees upstairs - Almost froze up cute button nose off and wake up to heater being left on.

Sniffles all morning :(

OK Cassi.... pleaser quit bragging about your Air Conditioner.   Here where I live, this early morning it was 4 degrees F and today's high will only be 19 deg F...  lots of snow on the ground and ice on the cars and more snow coming in the next few days.   At home I have my heat on, and also a nice propane stove in the Living Room next to my reading chair....   and I am doing a lot of baking and cooking so I can stay near the heat from the oven and stove!!!
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 15, 2018, 01:44:19 pm
More snow!!!  :P  What I thought to be a simple cold seems to keep getting progressively worse, woke up and could hardly breath

I'm sure it will clear up eventually but right now I'm hatin' on being a miserable gurgling yuck n' muck monster  :P

@ V M:  I hate it when I get all congested ...and it seems that this winter is worse than ever... some people here that I know have had the colds and congestion and coughing and hacking ....hang on for up to a month or even more.  I have been fortunate to have missed all of that fun.   When I do get really congested I have found the best OTC remedy for me seems to be Mucinex

I hope that you get well soon... it is miserable being miserable.
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 15, 2018, 01:51:04 pm
OK Cassi.... pleaser quit bragging about your Air Conditioner.   Here where I live, this early morning it was 4 degrees F and today's high will only be 19 deg F...  lots of snow on the ground and ice on the cars and more snow coming in the next few days.   At home I have my heat on, and also a nice propane stove in the Living Room next to my reading chair....   and I am doing a lot of baking and cooking so I can stay near the heat from the oven and stove!!!
Danielle

Did the solar storm give you a light show?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dena on March 15, 2018, 05:17:31 pm
More snow!!!  :P  What I thought to be a simple cold seems to keep getting progressively worse, woke up and could hardly breath

I'm sure it will clear up eventually but right now I'm hatin' on being a miserable gurgling yuck n' muck monster  :P
I don't know how your body responds to bugs, but if it keeps getting worst, consider seeing a doctor. For some reason lately there seem to be a lot of pneumonia going around and it can be pretty dangerous for some people.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Colleen_definitely on March 15, 2018, 05:26:47 pm
Yeah the gurgle sounds like a bad sign to me, a trip to the doc might be wise to do sooner than later.


I've barely slept in the last few nights. I think last night I got maybe an hour? Probably not even that. This stupid cough keeps waking me up, usually just at the moment I'm about to drift off. I never imagined an illness could be so sadistic...

I use Nyquil, because you can't be miserable if you're comatose.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 15, 2018, 07:38:27 pm
I don't know how your body responds to bugs, but if it keeps getting worst, consider seeing a doctor. For some reason lately there seem to be a lot of pneumonia going around and it can be pretty dangerous for some people.

True, there has been an outbreak of pneumonia this year and it is a concern of mine - One of my neighbors was in hospital for three days

I'll try to get in to be seen
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 15, 2018, 08:38:10 pm
Yesterday I had a guy somewhat aggressively tap my shoulder to move over so his wife can sit on the subway. Today I had a guy tell me he's getting out, but it was very packed and no one was moving. He started yelling at me...

I mean the second one was unfortunate, and I know how irritaring it was, but like he really didn't have to scream at me like I'm trash basically.


So now I'm wondering if it's because I'm 6 months on mtf hrt people are starting to see me as weaker/less likely to lash back at them? I obviously would never, unless I'm in danger, because there are some real psychos. But I'm also pretty sure pre hrt, I never had anything close to these situations happen to me. It could be that I look younger too? And yes both men were much taller than me.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 15, 2018, 09:34:02 pm
Probably because you're more laid back now?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 16, 2018, 02:04:59 am
Went for my prescription, forgot it's methadone day & the chemists full of smackrats.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 16, 2018, 03:01:56 am


Probably because you're more laid back now?

What do you mean?

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 16, 2018, 01:59:03 pm

What do you mean?

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

As a male since I can remember I was always told to be prepared, watchful of my surroundings and ready to respond to anything.  This effected how I walked, talked, body language - the whole enchilada.

Everyone who knew me before beginning HRT and now, have all stated that my mannerisms aren't as "tense" for lack of a better word.

People, who normally would have read the old me would never talked or approached me in an over-bearing way.  Now, however, I'm way laid back and at times a target for some.

Make sense?
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 16, 2018, 02:16:44 pm


As a male since I can remember I was always told to be prepared, watchful of my surroundings and ready to respond to anything.  This effected how I walked, talked, body language - the whole enchilada.

Everyone who knew me before beginning HRT and now, have all stated that my mannerisms aren't as "tense" for lack of a better word.

People, who normally would have read the old me would never talked or approached me in an over-bearing way.  Now, however, I'm way laid back and at times a target for some.

Make sense?

Maybe.. I mean I don't know. I do feel generally calmer after hrt but I don't think I would've reacted differently pre hrt. I had a stranger smack my head once pre hrt while on the subway and I've been called a fag. It could just be because of the size of nyc... I'm an easy target for sure

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 16, 2018, 02:27:06 pm

Maybe.. I mean I don't know. I do feel generally calmer after hrt but I don't think I would've reacted differently pre hrt. I had a stranger smack my head once pre hrt while on the subway and I've been called a fag. It could just be because of the size of nyc... I'm an easy target for sure

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Again, bearing and/or presence can make a difference.  While I have been changing some since HRT, I still wear a USMC baseball cap when I go out (covers my bald spot,lol). 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 16, 2018, 02:27:49 pm
Sonic Burger is coming out with a Pickle Juice Slushy - yuck unless you're pregnant :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 16, 2018, 03:03:15 pm
Getting my head around the fact that Familial Hypocalciuric Hypercalcemia is the BEST CASE situation for me right now. All the other possibilities are much worse.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 16, 2018, 03:15:01 pm
Getting my head around the fact that Familial Hypocalciuric Hypercalcemia is the BEST CASE situation for me right now. All the other possibilities are much worse.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Good luck with that - I can't even get them off my tongue :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 16, 2018, 03:26:49 pm
Good luck with that - I can't even get them off my tongue :)
What it basically means is a genetic condition where you have too much calcium in your blood and too little in your urine. That condition is basically benign. If I don't have that I have hypercalcemia and that is caused by or leads to tumors (cancerous or benlgn), heart disease, osteoporosis, kidney stones.  All kinds of bad stuff.

I'm hoping for the benign genetic condition but it's hella rare.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 17, 2018, 04:23:13 am
What it basically means is a genetic condition where you have too much calcium in your blood and too little in your urine. That condition is basically benign. If I don't have that I have hypercalcemia and that is caused by or leads to tumors (cancerous or benlgn), heart disease, osteoporosis, kidney stones.  All kinds of bad stuff.

I'm hoping for the benign genetic condition but it's hella rare.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Sorry to hear but thank you for the explanation.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 17, 2018, 06:52:54 am
Sorry to hear but thank you for the explanation.
That's OK. I needed to get it out. It's hard being strong for my family when all I want to do is break dow.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: CallMeKatie on March 17, 2018, 12:07:18 pm
Losing the insole to my trainer actually seconds after taking it out of my boots and it complely vanishing then stubbing my toes on my exercise bike so hard that the nails broke and are bleeding and then having my head phones get caught on my scarf and sent them flying out of my ears and down a drain on the street.

Grrr grrr grrr
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 17, 2018, 10:22:43 pm
Losing the insole to my trainer actually seconds after taking it out of my boots and it complely vanishing then stubbing my toes on my exercise bike so hard that the nails broke and are bleeding and then having my head phones get caught on my scarf and sent them flying out of my ears and down a drain on the street.

Grrr grrr grrr

Lock yourself in your closet immediately.  Do not go near water, electricity, tall buildings, short people.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 17, 2018, 10:23:18 pm
That's OK. I needed to get it out. It's hard being strong for my family when all I want to do is break dow.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Understandable
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 17, 2018, 11:17:35 pm
Feeling insecure about my face so I wore a hoodie on the train the whole time, didn't sit across from a bunch of random people and hid myself by facing a smelly person. Oh well

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: CallMeKatie on March 18, 2018, 05:15:28 am
Feeling insecure about my face so I wore a hooñdie on the train the whole time, didn't sit across from a bunch of random people and hid myself by facing a smelly person. Oh well

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Facing a smelly person hahaha. that's hilarious :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on March 18, 2018, 06:56:50 am
Flossing my teeth last night before bed and all of a sudden a crown on one of my molars fell out!  Now the root that is left is all sharp and jagged, and I have to work hard to keep from lacerating my tongue.  And, it being Sunday, I can't call the dentist until tomorrow morning.

I am sure the dentist will be happy to see me for real dentistry, rather than just pre-electrolysis pain control.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Faith on March 18, 2018, 07:12:55 am
oo, owww

Vaseline works to stick that bugger back in place until you can see your dentist .. unless you swallowed it   :icon_blah:
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: KathyLauren on March 18, 2018, 08:11:35 am
oo, owww

Vaseline works to stick that bugger back in place until you can see your dentist .. unless you swallowed it   :icon_blah:
I think if I did that, I'd be in fear of actually swallowing it.  I think I'm better off with the jagged edges.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on March 18, 2018, 08:19:28 am
I want to take the dressings off, but I can't.

I WANT TO TAKE THE DRESSINGS OFF, BUT I CAN'T
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: CallMeKatie on March 18, 2018, 08:51:38 am
That when I post the same post on online sites with one sating I am transgender and one not saying my gender, that people,  based on my photos, are much more positive whenthey think I am genetically female
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 18, 2018, 12:40:36 pm
That when I post the same post on online sites with one sating I am transgender and one not saying my gender, that people,  based on my photos, are much more positive whenthey think I am genetically female

Well, probably because your audience isn't trans. 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 18, 2018, 05:27:37 pm
Feeling lonely today and I don't know if I'm ready to meet people yet..

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 18, 2018, 06:06:58 pm
Today I realized that my marriage is really over. It has been for some time. And our lease is up at the end of the month and we haven't been offered another.

Consequently, when we next move I suspect we won't be going to the same place. She pays more than half of our expenses and I can't accept that if there's no "us".

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 18, 2018, 06:18:08 pm
Today I realized that my marriage is really over. It has been for some time. And our lease is up at the end of the month and we haven't been offered another.

Consequently, when we next move I suspect we won't be going to the same place. She pays more than half of our expenses and I can't accept that if there's no "us".

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

My second wife and I didn't even share the same bedroom for about a year before the marriage ended.  Sadly, there wasn't no 50/50 and in her head she planned to take what little I had. 

It can be rough but time heals (almost all) wounds.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: CallMeKatie on March 20, 2018, 04:01:43 pm
Because my mind destroys my mood for no reason at random moments, today I make me happy by existing
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 20, 2018, 04:16:23 pm
I'm happy because I have acknowledged my first real person Super Hero!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Kylo on March 21, 2018, 04:18:04 pm
So some dipstick has sent a package I mailed to Italy to the USA for some reason, tracked and everything. To be fair this is the first time it's ever happened in all my trading years... but it's a head-scratcher all right.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 21, 2018, 04:25:00 pm
My feelings for my roommate are growing.. I may be moving soon though. I don't think we'll see each other again.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 23, 2018, 02:02:31 am
Stupid me put the last plate of an expensive plate set in the oven to heat some food and it cracked  :(

 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: jaybutterfly on March 23, 2018, 05:17:07 am
Realizing I have absolutely crippling anxiety to the point I cant go to places like my kickboxing or judo club without hyperventilating and panicking.

I've called the doctors, they will most likely tell me to go back on meds or into CBT. If it helps take the edge off while I wait on the services I dont mind.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 23, 2018, 11:47:02 am
Stupid me put the last plate of an expensive plate set in the oven to heat some food and it cracked  :(

Alas, Sweet VM!  It was the Universe telling you to obtain a new set!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on March 23, 2018, 12:22:49 pm
My dysphoria’s hitting me really hard, out of nowhere. I’ve been in a decent mood this week, but my mood has completely gone
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 23, 2018, 12:29:57 pm
My dysphoria’s hitting me really hard, out of nowhere. I’ve been in a decent mood this week, but my mood has completely gone

And this too shall pass..............................................
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 23, 2018, 02:23:28 pm
Seeing a male in the mirror and not wanting to go outside at all..

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 23, 2018, 03:20:25 pm
Sometimes a guy, sometimes not.........................................

Then I start thinking even more deeper like:

If I'm seeing someone who's not a guy, what are others' seeing?
Aside from daughter and her friend I ask dare not.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 24, 2018, 02:36:53 pm
Sometimes I do things that cause me to question my intelligence, like coming to Seattle today. I didn't think about the protest that's going on today. Everything is late and traffic is a mess. I'm not going to make it to where I'm going....oh well...:)

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 24, 2018, 03:23:27 pm


Sometimes a guy, sometimes not.........................................

Then I start thinking even more deeper like:

If I'm seeing someone who's not a guy, what are others' seeing?
Aside from daughter and her friend I ask dare not.

What do they say?

Sometimes I do things that cause me to question my intelligence, like coming to Seattle today. I didn't think about the protest that's going on today. Everything is late and traffic is a mess. I'm not going to make it to where I'm going....oh well...:)

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Happens to me all the time!! Crazy how much I relate to this

Well today I got sir'ed (he saw me a few weeks ago and found out my name by being nosy and reading my paper) and called he multiple times (by same cashier who just seemed to be over it). It sucks I was on a good streak where no one misgendered me before today.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 24, 2018, 03:29:17 pm

What do they say?


LOL, I should have known you'd ask.

Well, my daughter's friend says that I appear more feminine and happier.  Daughter, especially when the Twin Sisters are brought up will start talking to me like I'm her mom.  For example, it was quite chilly the other day and my twins were perky as all get-out.  Daughter says, don't you just love it when they get so perky.

It was a first for me.  She'll acknowledge my femininity sometimes when she's not too rushed, lol.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 24, 2018, 03:50:32 pm




Well today I got sir'ed (he saw me a few weeks ago and found out my name by being nosy and reading my paper) and called he multiple times (by same cashier who just seemed to be over it). It sucks I was on a good streak where no one misgendered me before today.

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I got called a dude by a random guy that was talking to me. I still I get misgendered a lot. I know I don't pass, so usually it doesn't bother a lot. ( Ok maybe a little, but I am realistic about how I look.). It bothers me a lot less at work, because of my uniform. ( Even though I always wear makeup and lipstick.)

But this time it bothered me more, because it was my day off and I was in my regular clothes . But I shurrged it off. I'm not were I want to be yet. I will get there one day.



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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Rumples on March 24, 2018, 04:28:05 pm
My eldest being ill this afternoon.

Their speech and understanding is a bit behind, so they were just curled up next to me sobbing, trying to explain what hurt, but not understanding why.

Did what any parent would do: sofa, huge duvet, some My Little Pony on in the background. Was snoring in no time.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: meatwagon on March 24, 2018, 04:40:46 pm
everything.  just everything.  I'm so sick of every aspect of my life right now, I don't even know if it's worth it to keep going.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 24, 2018, 04:48:03 pm
everything.  just everything.  I'm so sick of every aspect of my life right now, I don't even know if it's worth it to keep going.
I'm sorry your feeling that way right now. And I know I have no idea what you going through. But no matter how bad this moment is. It's not forever. Life never stays bad forever. Believe me, I go through feelings quite often.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 24, 2018, 04:52:29 pm


LOL, I should have known you'd ask.

Well, my daughter's friend says that I appear more feminine and happier.  Daughter, especially when the Twin Sisters are brought up will start talking to me like I'm her mom.  For example, it was quite chilly the other day and my twins were perky as all get-out.  Daughter says, don't you just love it when they get so perky.

It was a first for me.  She'll acknowledge my femininity sometimes when she's not too rushed, lol.

Lol! That's hrt they're always perky aren't they?!


I got called a dude by a random guy that was talking to me. I still I get misgendered a lot. I know I don't pass, so usually it doesn't bother a lot. ( Ok maybe a little, but I am realistic about how I look.). It bothers me a lot less at work, because of my uniform. ( Even though I always wear makeup and lipstick.)

But this time it bothered me more, because it was my day off and I was in my regular clothes . But I shurrged it off. I'm not were I want to be yet. I will get there one day.



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Same for me but it really does bother me. I wanna shrug it off.. being misgendered is bringing my mood down. I can't tell anyone about it and it just makes for an uncomfortable situation overall. I need to learn how to shake it off because this is not a way to live

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 24, 2018, 05:01:57 pm




Same for me but it really does bother me. I wanna shrug it off.. being misgendered is bringing my mood down. I can't tell anyone about it and it just makes for an uncomfortable situation overall. I need to learn how to shake it off because this is not a way to live

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I'm not going to lie, it's hard sometimes . My heart sinks a little bit and my confidence falls when I get misgendered. It immediately makes me uncomfortable.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 24, 2018, 05:12:29 pm

I'm not going to lie, it's hard sometimes . My heart sinks a little bit and my confidence falls when I get misgendered. It immediately makes me uncomfortable.

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I honestly feel like I need to keep moving because of this. I know it sounds crazy but for my sanity. I can't keep seeing the same people while I'm changing. Not only my roommates but the neighborhood I'm in. I keep seeing the same people since I don't really venture out.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: meatwagon on March 24, 2018, 05:26:56 pm
I'm sorry your feeling that way right now. And I know I have no idea what you going through. But no matter how bad this moment is. It's not forever. Life never stays bad forever. Believe me, I go through feelings quite often.

Sent from my LG-TP450 using Tapatalk


I appreciate it.  sometimes it just gets really hard to look ahead when nothing ever seems to change..
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 24, 2018, 09:29:25 pm
Feeling like warmed over death and pretending everything's okay
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 24, 2018, 10:00:17 pm
Feeling like warmed over death and pretending everything's okay

Interesting twist.  So, why pretend, let it out, spill the beans, cough it off, enlighten, etc.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 24, 2018, 10:28:22 pm
I appreciate it.  sometimes it just gets really hard to look ahead when nothing ever seems to change..
What I keep saying to myself, is keep moving forward. Even if all I see ahead is darkness. The light is there. Even if it can't be seen yet, because it's too far away.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 24, 2018, 11:21:35 pm
Interesting twist.  So, why pretend, let it out, spill the beans, cough it off, enlighten, etc.

Just old injuries and bad habits taking their revenge upon me and kickin' my butt real good
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 25, 2018, 01:23:56 am
Just old injuries and bad habits taking their revenge upon me and kickin' my butt real good

I know how old injuries can mess ya up, especially with weather changes.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 25, 2018, 01:32:04 am
My roommate looked at me and then quickly b lined to his room and closed the door just now. Wow.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: November Fox on March 25, 2018, 09:51:55 am
I’m tired.

Tired of dysphoria and tired of being tired.
Tired that I self-sabotage all the time and ultimately create all this drama that makes me very unhappy. Tired of not knowing how I can stop creating drama. And somehow tolerate dysphoria without completely invalidating myself.

Urgh...
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 25, 2018, 02:53:28 pm
Darn Spiro and dehydration.  Been drinking Arrowhead water the past few days like I'm in Hell.  Water is okay except that I think it's accounting for my not losing any weight, 1 gallon water - 10 pounds.

Anyway, had three different dreams last night and because I woke up having to tinkle none of them finished and left me hanging.  Where the hell is the Sandman when you want a refund???????
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 25, 2018, 11:10:58 pm
Continued stomach issues  :P  Yeah, literal belly aching LOL

Didn't sleep well last night so I took a long nap this afternoon, woke up but didn't want to get out of my warm bed - But then the suicidal ideation started up so I decided I should probably get up and feed the animal and find something to take my mind off things

Then my hip and knee did their funny little thing and in an effort to catch my balance I knocked a few things over -  Nothing was damaged but it sure made a loud crash

Then of course some of my jerky neighbors continue to act like immature junior high school jerks  ::)  *Sigh*
A babysitter's work is never over   
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 26, 2018, 12:17:42 am
Continued stomach issues  :P  Yeah, literal belly aching LOL

Didn't sleep well last night so I took a long nap this afternoon, woke up but didn't want to get out of my warm bed - But then the suicidal ideation started up so I decided I should probably get up and feed the animal and find something to take my mind off things

Then my hip and knee did their funny little thing and in an effort to catch my balance I knocked a few things over -  Nothing was damaged but it sure made a loud crash

Then of course some of my jerky neighbors continue to act like immature junior high school jerks  ::)  *Sigh*
A babysitter's work is never over   

Hope tummy aches go away and neighbors grow up.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 26, 2018, 12:46:21 am
Hope tummy aches go away and neighbors grow up.

Thank you

Almost forgot, one of my sisters has been trying to start stuff with me so now there's family issues flaring up as well

No small wonder I'm a mess
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 26, 2018, 01:25:20 am
Body clock out of sync because the clocks went forward. Takes me a week to come round to it. Also got to reset the clock on my bike, it's a PITA to do
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 26, 2018, 03:16:03 pm
Body clock out of sync because the clocks went forward. Takes me a week to come round to it. Also got to reset the clock on my bike, it's a PITA to do

Wow, those time thieves get around.  They hit us here in Las Vegas a couple of weeks ago.  Time I will never get back.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on March 26, 2018, 10:16:45 pm
Getting a warning/sanction for speaking factually. People are doomed if the truth becomes a problem, and this community is no different. Just saying. I’d use more direct language, but I’d get kicked out of here. Some people are idiots, some are ignorant, some win the lottery and get both. Whoever was “offended by my words, GTFU.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 27, 2018, 01:33:22 am
Getting a warning/sanction for speaking factually. People are doomed if the truth becomes a problem, and this community is no different. Just saying. I’d use more direct language, but I’d get kicked out of here. Some people are idiots, some are ignorant, some win the lottery and get both. Whoever was “offended by my words, GTFU.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

Hi Aunt Gertie!

I'm sorry you had a bad day and hope things mellow out for you.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 27, 2018, 12:55:14 pm
Gnarly nightmares - Now I remember why I tend to avoid military and gun topics  :-\
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 27, 2018, 05:02:23 pm
I am so very sad today.  I just got a phone call today from a very best friend that disowned me when she discovered that I was transitioning.  I have not talked to her for over 3 years... but unfortunately the phone call was not about becoming friends again but rather another mutual past best friend that we both had... just died unexpectedly from sepsis caused by a serious wound that would not heal.   She wanted me to know even though both of them disowned me and have not spoken to me ... and she was wondering if I might travel down into the lower 48 to go to the funeral........   
It is so sad to hear this but more sad to realize the lost time with what were at one time two of my very best friends dating back to my high school and college days.
Danielle :'( :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on March 27, 2018, 05:18:39 pm
I am just beyond frustrated with school. As great as transition is going lately, I have been going insane trying to deal with this insane nonsense they try to pass off as education. I'm basically doing an extraordinarily hard project all but solo in a class with a completely unforgiving professor, spending ungodly amounts of time on it alone even before the class proper and other courses. I don't have any free time to just relax, and it just isn't slowing down pace at all. Even the little stuff is beyond frustrating. Case in point, this little gem:
"Your writeup should be no more less than 200 words."
........... What the hell am I supposed to do with that? So yeah. Just want this to end, and I'm seriously considering just saying forget it and going all out to pretty myself up to find a rich husband.

It is so sad to hear this but more sad to realize the lost time with what were at one time two of my very best friends dating back to my high school and college days.
Danielle :'( :(

So sorry to hear that Danielle.  :-\
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 27, 2018, 05:39:56 pm
snipped: 
So sorry to hear that Danielle.  :-\

@ Roll:  She asked if I was going back to my hometown to go to the funeral...  I told here that I could not. 
I have my own business as a CPA and here in the USA everyone knows it is tax season and I am slammed with clients that are filing late trying to get their tax returns sent in.

Anyway, there is another problem, going back home to many old friends, acquaintances and family... and others that have taken me off of their list.... I don't really want to go there.
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 27, 2018, 05:45:38 pm
Sorry to hear Danielle it's really sad she died and you also weren't really on good terms. To just have people turn on you when transitioning is very painful.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 27, 2018, 06:04:53 pm
Sorry to hear Danielle it's really sad she died and you also weren't really on good terms. To just have people turn on you when transitioning is very painful.

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Allison:  For sure.. people, good and best friends even ... and family too... can be very painful to deal with before, during and after transitioning.....  makes it very difficult, that is one of the reasons I am here and not there.  It is so sad for the specific reason that at one time she was my very best friend and buddy, we were inseparable.  The thing that I miss most is the lost time being around her and lost friendship we had.
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 27, 2018, 06:13:23 pm
I'm so sorry to hear that you're dealing with this.  True friends are rare and some fair weather friends aren't worth the time.  As I have progressed with my HRT though compared to most of you, mine has been a drop in the bucket so to speak, I have been letting people and family know.  While it is not my intent to count how many I think it's about 20 thus far and only 1 negative (my brother) and maybe my 1st wife who I don't talk to directly.

And I think what motivates people, such as your friends who shunned you is confronting their own mortality?

Hugs

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 27, 2018, 07:37:06 pm
Today at work I got in to 2 personal disagreements with 2 female coworkers who unfortunately I had dated/ fooled around with as a male one of them has been rude to me since we stopped and the other one I am trying to stay friends with as she has always been there for me and was/is my best friend I know we both still have feelings for each other but I know It will not go anywhere. I learned my lesson never ever date/fool around with people at work it may be fun at the time but will make your life a living hell if things go bad.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on March 27, 2018, 09:11:58 pm
I haven't been able to take my estradiol for about a week which unfortunately, in my case, leads to depression, moodiness, and low grade headaches.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 27, 2018, 09:29:43 pm
Today at work I got in to 2 personal disagreements with 2 female coworkers who unfortunately I had dated/ fooled around with as a male one of them has been rude to me since we stopped and the other one I am trying to stay friends with as she has always been there for me and was/is my best friend I know we both still have feelings for each other but I know It will not go anywhere. I learned my lesson never ever date/fool around with people at work it may be fun at the time but will make your life a living hell if things go bad.

@ natalie.ashlyne:  Well, that is a twist on romantic office relationships....  those 2 female coworkers that you dated as a man, and now you are a woman....  perhaps they a upset that you left you manhood behind and became one of them....  they perhaps are somewhat worried that you will compete with them.
.... BUT, in a larger company you and your co-workers could have been fired for the dating affairs.  I saw that happen in a large company I was working for in the past.
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 27, 2018, 09:37:09 pm


Today at work I got in to 2 personal disagreements with 2 female coworkers who unfortunately I had dated/ fooled around with as a male one of them has been rude to me since we stopped and the other one I am trying to stay friends with as she has always been there for me and was/is my best friend I know we both still have feelings for each other but I know It will not go anywhere. I learned my lesson never ever date/fool around with people at work it may be fun at the time but will make your life a living hell if things go bad.

Yikes!! That is messy
Hope things get better for you and I mean, finding a new job can sometimes be for the best

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 27, 2018, 09:56:13 pm
@ natalie.ashlyne:  Well, that is a twist on romantic office relationships....  those 2 female coworkers that you dated as a man, and now you are a woman....  perhaps they a upset that you left you manhood behind and became one of them....  they perhaps are somewhat worried that you will compete with them.
.... BUT, in a larger company you and your co-workers could have been fired for the dating affairs.  I saw that happen in a large company I was working for in the past.
Danielle

Thank you DanielleYes I see your point about them and it makes total sence to me and I swear I have learn my lesson and that will never happen again I will never date any one from work ever I dont even think I would date anyone in the healthcare field 


Yikes!! That is messy
Hope things get better for you and I mean, finding a new job can sometimes be for the best

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Thanks Allison yes I hope so too, I would look for a new job but I have been there 14 years just got full time with benifits and 10 sick day and 30 vacation days so it would be hard to match  I am thinking maybe a new career as I love what I do but I am also well in my area.  I am also thinking of moving but this all needs money so I really have to think. I also think I created this mess now I have to clean it up. I need a big mop and bucket
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 27, 2018, 11:26:30 pm
Wierd thoughts - when I look at my avatar pic or any pic of me and I look at my nose, upside down, I see a flesh colored Grey Alien - Yikes
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on March 28, 2018, 12:42:52 pm
Sitting here doing nothing even though I have so much stuff I need to be doing because I have to sign for a perishable package of medicine that was supposed to be here by 10:30 am but is now..... let's see, 3 hours and 12 minutes overdue. Super fun. I seriously have so much I need to be working on that I can't be, not to mention errands to run and I was going to try sell more comics today. Ugh.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 28, 2018, 01:12:38 pm
Oh how I yearn for more rustic days such as phones being connect to outlets and no answering machines. 

So, prior to moving to Las Vegas I had my Long Beach phone number 562 area code for more years than I remember.  Even kept it in Texas.  However, over the past couple of years I have been getting an insane amount of sales calls or BS calls to the point I upgraded my phone and obtained a 702 number thinking that it would solve the call problem.

Apparently, phone companies don't kill numbers for any length of time because not only do I get calls and text messages for the person who use to have the phone but I've been getting an insane amount of sales calls and some numb asses with a 202 (DC) area code stating that I have warrants out for my arrest, which we know are BS.  Fortunately, my new phone has the block number function but it's still a "PITA" to get up when the phone rings only to find a numb-arse number calling.

The sad or bad thing is there's always the chance I'll miss a call from someone because I didn't know their number.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 28, 2018, 02:44:41 pm
Yeah I just got a new number and was getting random callers but it's died down a bit.

I had my 7 th laser session for my face and the puffiness that happens is still as bad as the 1st time... it did hurt a lot but I'm starting to like the pain. I tell myself it means that it's working. But I hate how puffy it gets for almost 3 days!! And it just makes my shadow even more obvious

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on March 28, 2018, 02:46:08 pm
I am unhappy that my hair is already a bit greasy looking even though I took a shower the other day. I never had this problem until I started HRT 2 years ago.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on March 28, 2018, 02:59:00 pm
Yeah I just got a new number and was getting random callers but it's died down a bit.

I had my 7 th laser session for my face and the puffiness that happens is still as bad as the 1st time... it did hurt a lot but I'm starting to like the pain. I tell myself it means that it's working. But I hate how puffy it gets for almost 3 days!! And it just makes my shadow even more obvious

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I am having laser hair treatment too, and I was hoping the pain would lessen after a few more treatments. I think I read somewhere that the pain lessens once more of your facial hair is removed or something but I guess not. I will say that it is a lot better then electrolysis as that was like the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my life.

I am sorry about the puffiness and the shadow :( I have also noticed the shadow, and facial hair returns for a few days after treatment but apparently that is normal.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 28, 2018, 03:05:11 pm


I am having laser hair treatment too, and I was hoping the pain would lessen after a few more treatments. I think I read somewhere that the pain lessens once more of your facial hair is removed or something but I guess not. I will say that it is a lot better then electrolysis as that was like the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my life.

I am sorry about the puffiness and the shadow :( I have also noticed the shadow, and facial hair returns for a few days after treatment but apparently that is normal.

Well my tech keeps increasing the strength so it's still as painful for me. I definitely tolerate it better than I used to. Today I didn't have numbing cream and just stuck through the pain. Last time I did use numbing cream and it was still painful.

Yes it does return but some should be shedding usually. For me the hair gets stuck and is covered by skin which makes it unsightly for about a week or so. Then the hairs pop out and I can finally shave them.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on March 28, 2018, 03:43:16 pm

Well my tech keeps increasing the strength so it's still as painful for me. I definitely tolerate it better than I used to. Today I didn't have numbing cream and just stuck through the pain. Last time I did use numbing cream and it was still painful.

Yes it does return but some should be shedding usually. For me the hair gets stuck and is covered by skin which makes it unsightly for about a week or so. Then the hairs pop out and I can finally shave them.

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@ Allison:  Ahhh, the price of beauty.  This too shall pass and when you get to the point that your laser treatments start coming to an end, you will then realize that when you look in the mirror that you will conclude that it was well worth the temporary discomfort.

I think that writing about it and other frustrating transitioning issues can make everything better... self-therapy by keeping a journal or update log.  It works for me.

Hang in there girl..... and keep your updates coming.
Hugs,
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on March 28, 2018, 04:17:58 pm

Well my tech keeps increasing the strength so it's still as painful for me. I definitely tolerate it better than I used to. Today I didn't have numbing cream and just stuck through the pain. Last time I did use numbing cream and it was still painful.

Yes it does return but some should be shedding usually. For me the hair gets stuck and is covered by skin which makes it unsightly for about a week or so. Then the hairs pop out and I can finally shave them.

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Oh, I had no idea that they could increase the strength... :icon_cry2: Personally, I can barley handle the pain now, so I can't imagine how painful it must be on a higher setting. Yeah, I have also found numbing cream to not be very helpful as well.

I am sorry about your hair getting stuck underneath your skin. That sounds like it would suck :( Hopefully you will be done with laser hair removal soon. I am not sure how many treatments it takes, but I am hoping it does not last too long.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 28, 2018, 05:06:54 pm
@ Allison:  Ahhh, the price of beauty.  This too shall pass and when you get to the point that your laser treatments start coming to an end, you will then realize that when you look in the mirror that you will conclude that it was well worth the temporary discomfort.

I think that writing about it and other frustrating transitioning issues can make everything better... self-therapy by keeping a journal or update log.  It works for me.

Hang in there girl..... and keep your updates coming.
Hugs,
Danielle

Yeah I should do that. I talk about stuff in therapy but writing things down would be good too. Actually a lot of people in my support group said that's what they do to cope.


Oh, I had no idea that they could increase the strength... :icon_cry2: Personally, I can barley handle the pain now, so I can't imagine how painful it must be on a higher setting. Yeah, I have also found numbing cream to not be very helpful as well.

I am sorry about your hair getting stuck underneath your skin. That sounds like it would suck :( Hopefully you will be done with laser hair removal soon. I am not sure how many treatments it takes, but I am hoping it does not last too long.

Yes we'll get there! I have 1 more I paid for and I'm really hoping it eliminates the upper lip hairs... now that a lot of the dark hairs aren't coming back I see the white hairs. I may switch to electrolysis soon for those

On another note, some guy said my face looks yellow on a dating app. Lol. It makes me scared because hrt takes a toll on our livers.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 28, 2018, 11:34:37 pm
Got jumped on by a large ill mannered puppy - I'm pretty sure it just wanted to play but it aggravated all my old injuries  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: ChrissyRyan on March 28, 2018, 11:37:10 pm
Got jumped on by a large ill mannered puppy - I'm pretty sure it just wanted to play but it aggravated all my old injuries  :P


Dog gone! 

Looks like earlier would have been better.   :)


Chrissy
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on March 29, 2018, 12:24:27 am

Dog gone! 

Looks like earlier would have been better.   :)


Chrissy

Thanks for your consideration

It was earlier in the day, I went home and took a nap but now I'm stiff and sore and snapping my parts is parts back into place

I just wish stupid people didn't own large stupid animals
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on March 29, 2018, 01:21:36 pm
Yeah I should do that. I talk about stuff in therapy but writing things down would be good too. Actually a lot of people in my support group said that's what they do to cope.


Yes we'll get there! I have 1 more I paid for and I'm really hoping it eliminates the upper lip hairs... now that a lot of the dark hairs aren't coming back I see the white hairs. I may switch to electrolysis soon for those

On another note, some guy said my face looks yellow on a dating app. Lol. It makes me scared because hrt takes a toll on our livers.

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I would say that you do not want to go through electrolysis, but you seem to be able to handle pain much better then I could. I do not know if you know how electrolysis works, but they basically shove a small needle into each individual hole where the hair grows out of, and it is not a pleasant experience at all.

Personally I would just deal with shaving off the white hairs, as going through electrolysis was a hellish nightmare.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 29, 2018, 01:27:49 pm
I would say that you do not want to go through electrolysis, but you seem to be able to handle pain much better then I could. I do not know if you know how electrolysis works, but they basically shove a small needle into each individual hole where the hair grows out of, and it is not a pleasant experience at all.

Personally I would just deal with shaving off the white hairs, as going through electrolysis was a hellish nightmare.
Thanks for your honesty. I'm terrible with pain. Whenever I get lasered, it's just my face, but the shock pushes my whole body back so I'm literally involuntarily jumping while laying down... it's actually very funny!

You're right..  I've been tweezing the white hairs. I saw an electrologist last week but we didn't get to do a trial. Maybe that was for the best..

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on March 29, 2018, 01:28:08 pm
Today I am unhappy that the sun is not going away anytime soon. The only time I personally like going out is when it is cold and gloomy, as that is when most people disappear, and plus I just like the rain. I love California, but I truly despise its weather.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on March 29, 2018, 01:35:48 pm
Thanks for your honesty. I'm terrible with pain. Whenever I get lasered, it's just my face, but the shock pushes my whole body back so I'm literally involuntarily jumping while laying down... it's actually very funny!

You're right..  I've been tweezing the white hairs. I saw an electrologist last week but we didn't get to do a trial. Maybe that was for the best..

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Avoiding electrolysis would be the correct choice in my opinion lol. I wish someone would have told me before I went through that hell...sigh. My electrologist told me it was the best option, but she was lying lol. I am so glad I did laser instead.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: MollyPants on March 29, 2018, 02:05:32 pm
Frickin everything today wound me up and I just couldn't understand why. Like why I am so bad tempered. I tried eating I tried walking and nothing worked.

Got home and had a shave and put some lippy on with my favourite dress and everything is suddenly fine so I guess it was my dysphoria slapping Menon the face. It's really rubbish sometimes.

Rant over happy Molly now :) xx

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 29, 2018, 02:10:39 pm


Avoiding electrolysis would be the correct choice in my opinion lol. I wish someone would have told me before I went through that hell...sigh. My electrologist told me it was the best option, but she was lying lol. I am so glad I did laser instead.

I hate that!! I guess they try to sell us on it since that's their job. Yeah I have my 8th laser treatment, I'm hoping I'll be done soon

Today I am unhappy that the sun is not going away anytime soon. The only time I personally like going out is when it is cold and gloomy, as that is when most people disappear, and plus I just like the rain. I love California, but I truly despise its weather.

You'd love it here in NY in winter!! I'm actually planning to visit CA and maybe move over. Because of the weather!

So I just had a woman that works at the bakery section at the grocery just give me this really nasty look when I told her that my coffee was priced wrong (by the other woman). I had another bag in my hand and she said in a very nasty tone/attitude "so you don't want that?". I'm gonna go back and complain about her. To add salt to the wound she called me "he". She even kept looking at me like I was trying to take something over the glass blocking the abysmal bakery selection...

Not to sound like an egomaniac but I think she was clearly angry that a HE can look better than she does. The other worker was lovely to me though.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 29, 2018, 02:41:48 pm
Celulitis back with a leg ulcer to put the cherry on it.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 29, 2018, 03:24:31 pm
Celulitis back with a leg ulcer to put the cherry on it.

Wow!  And they say it goes away and never comes back!
I was medivac in Nam due to my leg hurting, long dark line to a wierd looking pimple which turned out to be cellulitis.  This was back in the way early 70's.  First on a Navy Hospital Ship, then transferred to (fortunately) Naval Regional Medical Center near my hometown.  3 months.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on March 29, 2018, 03:55:36 pm
My 2nd time with celulitis, started using a  stick in 2014.Spent most of 2015 in a compression bandage
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on March 30, 2018, 03:53:11 am

I hate that!! I guess they try to sell us on it since that's their job. Yeah I have my 8th laser treatment, I'm hoping I'll be done soon

You'd love it here in NY in winter!! I'm actually planning to visit CA and maybe move over. Because of the weather!

So I just had a woman that works at the bakery section at the grocery just give me this really nasty look when I told her that my coffee was priced wrong (by the other woman). I had another bag in my hand and she said in a very nasty tone/attitude "so you don't want that?". I'm gonna go back and complain about her. To add salt to the wound she called me "he". She even kept looking at me like I was trying to take something over the glass blocking the abysmal bakery selection...

Not to sound like an egomaniac but I think she was clearly angry that a HE can look better than she does. The other worker was lovely to me though.

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My grandpa used to tell me stories about how cold it would get in the winter, as he grew up in NY. I love the cold but I do have a limit, as anything below 30 degrees is to much for me personally.

Sorry about the crappy situation you went through. People can sometimes be jerks unfortunately.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 30, 2018, 05:51:40 am
My grandpa used to tell me stories about how cold it would get in the winter, as he grew up in NY. I love the cold but I do have a limit, as anything below 30 degrees is to much for me personally.

Sorry about the crappy situation you went through. People can sometimes be jerks unfortunately.
Yeah winter is crazy here.. I always have a problem at this market. It's the closest to where I live so I go for convenience... and then I feel like the guys that work there are following me to make sure I don't steal anything? I hate the place and I'm calling to make a complaint. I don't know if it'll do anything but I'll have to try. I do really like their cookies lol

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: kk on March 30, 2018, 11:43:49 am
Allergies!  Or a cold!  Or something!  Gf and I are both sick and we can't afford meds or time off from work, so that's fun!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 30, 2018, 12:10:18 pm
Allergies!  Or a cold!  Or something!  Gf and I are both sick and we can't afford meds or time off from work, so that's fun!!!

Definitely something in the air.  I have issues and use tissues all the time.  My daughter has been sick for the past few days.  Spring fever, I tell you, Spring fever!!!!!!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 30, 2018, 12:43:39 pm
Allergies!  Or a cold!  Or something!  Gf and I are both sick and we can't afford meds or time off from work, so that's fun!!!

That sucks I am sick too mine started last night I caught what we as the outbreak at work.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 30, 2018, 12:53:07 pm
That sucks I am sick too mine started last night I caught what we as the outbreak at work.

First off - Tiffany!  Don't you know hospitals are where people go to get sick????

Secondly, my niece text me this morning that my sister who lives in Sacramento is dying and made it sound like she would be dead in the next few days.  This information came to her from my sister's boyfriend.  I asked what was wrong with her and she said he didn't know.  ?????  He wanted everyone to travel to Sacramento to see her.  All the family, excepting me, is in Long Beach and I pretty much thought it was odd that he would expect everyone to jump on a plane and fly to Sacramento. 

My daughter and I are in the process of buying a new car and all the funds are tied up so flying is outta the question.  Then my niece says I need to take the bus and I respond, no way (too old for that).  As I pushed for more information she tells me that her mom (my other sister) and her are going in May. 

I say May?????  I'm a little perturbed by this point and say, May????  You made it sound like she's going to be dead next week.  Apparently, she does dialysis and chemo and her boyfriend freaks out over that. 

Don't get me wrong, I love my family but sometimes I think I have to look for some loose marbles.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 30, 2018, 12:54:24 pm
Responding to a thread here and talking about my family. I'm the youngest of 6 kids. Everyone has their own lives, and we try to stay in touch. Usually we all get together on holidays, birthdays, lunches and other events. Sometimes I'll visit my sisters with my mom. Anyway, they can't do very much for me. I mean they don't have time and I don't want to be a burden.

So what makes me sad is that I have a wall up to protect myself and them. I know people will say I need to open up, but I really don't think it's going to matter. One of my sisters knows and I told her there's nothing anyone can do to help me. And it's true there really isn't. I have to help myself as they're raising their families and going on with their lives. I guess this is what being an adult is like...

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurel D on March 31, 2018, 12:08:45 am
Sometimes when I speak I wonder why I say such stupid things. I feel like sometimes my social skills may have eroded.( Or what few social skills I had to begin with. ) I don’t get a lot of time to speak to speak to others . So I start off really scared. But once people get me to start talking if feels like I don’t know when does shut the hell up. I keep going, I get too personal, I say overly personal things about myself without realizing I did it until it’s too late. It sucks because part of me wishes I didn’t have the desire to talk to people and make friends. But I do have that desire. I just don’t know how to anymore. Has anyone else
felt that way before.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 31, 2018, 12:11:44 am
Well, kind of a follow-up to my earlier post regarding my sister's poor health.  I spoke with my other niece who's my sister's daughter and she was blown away by my other niece's saying that my sister is dying.

Granted she's on dialysis and some chemo but fairing well considering all.  Where and why the niece who's not the daughter of the sister in question (make sense?) got her information is still being questioned.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Laurie K on March 31, 2018, 12:19:53 am
transphobic family
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on March 31, 2018, 01:04:09 am
The guy that I replaced to live in this room called me because I said I'm moving out and gave my 30 day notice. He threatened that I would be responsible for the 3 remaining months I signed the sublease for... he just couldn't accept it and pretty much freaked out on me because he's in Cali. But his good friend who is also on the lease lives here too. And the other new roommate who moved in the same I did wants my room because it's bigger and the same price.

I just don't understand why he's freaking out. I'm basically giving them 30 days, April is paid for and I don't mind helping find someone if they really need me to. I actually got upset and just short of told him to ___ off. Literally he was acting worse than a child. I understand it's not ideal but I explained my situation and that should be enough. So I emailed him to make it more official and I said on there that he can only contact to speak with me in a calm and respectful manner.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 31, 2018, 04:04:00 pm
Well, kind of a follow-up to my earlier post regarding my sister's poor health.  I spoke with my other niece who's my sister's daughter and she was blown away by my other niece's saying that my sister is dying.

Granted she's on dialysis and some chemo but fairing well considering all.  Where and why the niece who's not the daughter of the sister in question (make sense?) got her information is still being questioned.

Thinking of you and your sister at this time, Hope she gets better.  Hugs
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 31, 2018, 04:34:24 pm
Thinking of you and your sister at this time, Hope she gets better.  Hugs

Thank you Tiffany! 
It's appreciated.  My niece who started all this yesterday and has always been my number 1 supporter has been kinda quiet since yesterday.  I don't know if she was drunk or someone gave her bad info or what.  My sister's daughter like I said was blown away when I asked her last night.

In all honesty, while I love both my sisters dearly, this one seem to get all the new diseases when they came out to the point that we didn't really believe she was having problems.

BTW, I just love teasing you with the "Tiffany"
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 31, 2018, 04:43:24 pm
Thank you Tiffany! 
It's appreciated.  My niece who started all this yesterday and has always been my number 1 supporter has been kinda quiet since yesterday.  I don't know if she was drunk or someone gave her bad info or what.  My sister's daughter like I said was blown away when I asked her last night.

In all honesty, while I love both my sisters dearly, this one seem to get all the new diseases when they came out to the point that we didn't really believe she was having problems.

BTW, I just love teasing you with the "Tiffany"

She could have just panicked I have seen it lots of times myself.  I do wish she get better soon I hope the best for her.
And Yes I figured that so do all the girls at work and the guys too I am just Easy........
 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 31, 2018, 08:11:23 pm
She could have just panicked I have seen it lots of times myself.  I do wish she get better soon I hope the best for her.
And Yes I figured that so do all the girls at work and the guys too I am just Easy........

So Easy is getting into Tiff?

Uhoo
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 31, 2018, 08:13:56 pm
So Easy is getting into Tiff?

Uhoo

No not  that way easy to have fun with I am a bit of a tease though
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 31, 2018, 08:14:54 pm
No not  that way easy to have fun with I am a bit of a tease though

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooook

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on March 31, 2018, 08:17:33 pm
Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooook

I did not mean sexual fun with like easy i meant easy to get along with easy going lol
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on March 31, 2018, 08:18:17 pm
I did not mean sexual fun with like easy i meant easy to get along with easy going lol

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooook :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 01, 2018, 01:59:35 pm
Well I just saw my sister sent out thank you cards for my nieces birthday (a month ago) and I didn't get one... I was at the party and I gave a gift (money).. It just hurts even though I would still do it again because I love my niece.
My other sister sent me a thank you card. She made it a point to ask what my address is.
Anyway I feel silly being upset over this.. Bleh what a great easter..

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on April 01, 2018, 02:32:13 pm
Well I just saw my sister sent out thank you cards for my nieces birthday (a month ago) and I didn't get one... I was at the party and I gave a gift (money).. It just hurts even though I would still do it again because I love my niece.
My other sister sent me a thank you card. She made it a point to ask what my address is.
Anyway I feel silly being upset over this.. Bleh what a great easter..

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It's in the mail, ask your roomies :(
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 01, 2018, 03:15:32 pm
It's in the mail, ask your roomies :(
It's not. But I won't fret more than I have. I have transitioning to worry about right now!!

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on April 01, 2018, 04:52:06 pm
Dysphoria driven panic attack at Easter brunch. First time since really making progress I had to put on a dress shirt and pants (which I never liked to begin with) and couldn't wear my hat to cover up balding in public. Seeing myself in mirrors, and seeing random guys that I knew I looked just like at that moment... It hit me really hard, and I went into the bathroom, checked if all the stalls were empty and just sobbed.

Also, the food just plain sucked. Another case of a fancy place that charges way too much for outright bad food. I mean it wasn't even that it wasn't worth the price, it was just plain bad by any standard and I wouldn't choose to eat if it was free.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on April 01, 2018, 05:26:31 pm
It's not. But I won't fret more than I have. I have transitioning to worry about right now!!

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Think of transitioning like that song "Sailing", don't remember who sang it but on a good note, I remember how to speel transitioning correclty :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on April 01, 2018, 05:42:54 pm
Dysphoria driven panic attack at Easter brunch. First time since really making progress I had to put on a dress shirt and pants (which I never liked to begin with) and couldn't wear my hat to cover up balding in public. Seeing myself in mirrors, and seeing random guys that I knew I looked just like at that moment... It hit me really hard, and I went into the bathroom, checked if all the stalls were empty and just sobbed.

Also, the food just plain sucked. Another case of a fancy place that charges way too much for outright bad food. I mean it wasn't even that it wasn't worth the price, it was just plain bad by any standard and I wouldn't choose to eat if it was free.

That sucks, Ellie. Hope you're feeling better. The food being bad is just like salt in an open wound.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on April 01, 2018, 06:02:22 pm
That sucks, Ellie. Hope you're feeling better. The food being bad is just like salt in an open wound.

It made me realize that one way or another, passing or not, I have to move up my time table. I can't do that ever again. I came home and just slept all afternoon out of shear adrenaline exhaustion from the panic attack, I haven't done that in years. Used to be the hallmark of my agoraphobia if I had to leave the house for something.

(Though I did have one I guess positive thing leading up to it. I was originally going to go in a plain pink shirt, men's shirt technically but was eastery enough I could get by with it not actually being dressy. That plan went out the window when I realized that the shirt was a little see through and my breasts were completely visible and very obviously looking like breasts, not moobs. So I had to put on the darker dress shirt over it.)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 01, 2018, 06:34:32 pm
Think of transitioning like that song "Sailing", don't remember who sang it but on a good note, I remember how to speel transitioning correclty :)
Christopher Cross or Rod Stewart? I looked up both lol
Thanks Cassi transitioning is a good "worry" to have..

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Cassi on April 01, 2018, 07:16:52 pm
Christopher Cross or Rod Stewart? I looked up both lol
Thanks Cassi transitioning is a good "worry" to have..

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:)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on April 01, 2018, 08:31:20 pm
I suffer from a lot of depression that is usually followed with suicidal thoughts, and I am feeling pretty down again today. My mind is a void of negativity so I am always depressed about something though. I am not fond of myself, or my life or anything really and sometimes it just really gets to me.

Whelp, my cousin walked in my room and I am pretty sure she saw what I wrote above so that sucks. I really wish I could disappear right now honestly. What a fun Easter this is.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on April 01, 2018, 08:54:54 pm
I suffer from a lot of depression that is usually followed with suicidal thoughts, and I am feeling pretty down again today. My mind is a void of negativity so I am always depressed about something though. I am not fond of myself, or my life or anything really and sometimes it just really gets to me.

Whelp, my cousin walked in my room and I am pretty sure she saw what I wrote above so that sucks. I really wish I could disappear right now honestly. What a fun Easter this is.

I'm right there with you on this Easter.  :-X  I hope this doesn't sound like a hollow platitude, but just remember you are not alone in those feelings, and over my time on these forums I've seen many people share the problems that we face move on to be happy beyond their wildest dreams. There is hope, and don't lose sight of that!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on April 01, 2018, 09:17:52 pm
I'm right there with you on this Easter.  :-X  I hope this doesn't sound like a hollow platitude, but just remember you are not alone in those feelings, and over my time on these forums I've seen many people share the problems that we face move on to be happy beyond their wildest dreams. There is hope, and don't lose sight of that!

Thank you for the kind words Roll  :) Also, I am sorry your Easter is not going well either.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 01, 2018, 09:35:56 pm
I'm feeling the same way TicTac.. I just don't know if I have it in me...
My brother in laws mother, who's a horrible person for other reasons, randomly jumps in a conversation I'm having with my niece and says "you should cut your hair I don't like it like that!"... my whole family, 3 sisters, brother, 2 nieces and my mom were all there. It was just terrible. My mom tried to defend me I guess and said "that's the style now everyone is doing it" no mom.. that's just how I want to do my hair! But at least she tried...

I just got burnt and stale fries and I went back to the chinese place and they were so rude. I'm so over today, it's just been one thing after another

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on April 01, 2018, 09:45:53 pm
I'm feeling the same way TicTac.. I just don't know if I have it in me...
My brother in laws mother, who's a horrible person for other reasons, randomly jumps in a conversation I'm having with my niece and says "you should cut your hair I don't like it like that!"... my whole family, 3 sisters, brother, 2 nieces and my mom were all there. It was just terrible. My mom tried to defend me I guess and said "that's the style now everyone is doing it" no mom.. that's just how I want to do my hair! But at least she tried...

I just got burnt and stale fries and I went back to the chinese place and they were so rude. I'm so over today, it's just been one thing after another

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I am sorry that happened, some people are just rude and put there 2 cents in where it dont belong it you ever want or
 just need to talk just pm me and that goes for anyone sometimes just talking helps :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 01, 2018, 09:53:05 pm
I am sorry that happened, some people are just rude and put there 2 cents in where it dont belong it you ever want or
 just need to talk just pm me and that goes for anyone sometimes just talking helps :)
you're a sweetheart I just feel like I can be too much for any one person and so I just post here to let it out a bit

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on April 01, 2018, 10:00:42 pm
you're a sweetheart I just feel like I can be too much for any one person and so I just post here to let it out a bit

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LOL sorry you think you are to much I deal with 83 females and I know more personal problems  about them than there families. Their is nothing I have not heard yet.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on April 01, 2018, 10:18:56 pm
I seem to have come down with another bug of some kind  :P
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on April 01, 2018, 10:30:00 pm
I'm feeling the same way TicTac.. I just don't know if I have it in me...
My brother in laws mother, who's a horrible person for other reasons, randomly jumps in a conversation I'm having with my niece and says "you should cut your hair I don't like it like that!"... my whole family, 3 sisters, brother, 2 nieces and my mom were all there. It was just terrible. My mom tried to defend me I guess and said "that's the style now everyone is doing it" no mom.. that's just how I want to do my hair! But at least she tried...

I just got burnt and stale fries and I went back to the chinese place and they were so rude. I'm so over today, it's just been one thing after another

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I am sorry that your Easter has been sh*t. Maybe the Chinese people were just mad that they had to work on Easter or something, but that does not give them any right to be mean. In my signature I stated that I do not have enough middle fingers, and this is a good example why. The world is filled with A**holes unfortunately.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 02, 2018, 07:42:33 am


I am sorry that your Easter has been sh*t. Maybe the Chinese people were just mad that they had to work on Easter or something, but that does not give them any right to be mean. In my signature I stated that I do not have enough middle fingers, and this is a good example why. The world is filled with A**holes unfortunately.

Thank you I can't see sigs since I'm on the tapatalk app but that's how I feel too

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 02, 2018, 03:12:36 pm
Some guy asking for change on the street called me "bro".. it really bothered me. I think I need to just suck it up and start presenting again. This is not good for my mental health at all

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on April 02, 2018, 03:29:10 pm
Some guy asking for change on the street called me "bro".. it really bothered me. I think I need to just suck it up and start presenting again. This is not good for my mental health at all

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@ Allison:  Never give up, never surrender.   Occasional "failures" usually lead to more successes because we can learn from them.
 
Be certain to go out there with as much self-confidence and self-assurance as you can muster....   be sure to present yourself as a confident and happy female no matter what is thrown at you in way of comments, stares, and pointing. Personally I had experienced all of that myself.  We have all been there.  It is not pleasant but it happens to almost all of us.

Please keep your updates coming. 
If you report bad news we can all support and encourage you.   
If you report good news we can all rejoice, celebrate and be happy for you.

Hugs for you!!!!
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 02, 2018, 03:48:49 pm
@ Allison:  Never give up, never surrender.   Occasional "failures" usually lead to more successes because we can learn from them.
 
Be certain to go out there with as much self-confidence and self-assurance as you can muster....   be sure to present yourself as a confident and happy female no matter what is thrown at you in way of comments, stares, and pointing. Personally I had experienced all of that myself.  We have all been there.  It is not pleasant but it happens to almost all of us.

Please keep your updates coming. 
If you report bad news we can all support and encourage you.   
If you report good news we can all rejoice, celebrate and be happy for you.

Hugs for you!!!!
Danielle
Thanks
I tell my friend a random guy called me bro and it bothered me and she says "yeah man or sir is better" lol kill me

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sinead on April 03, 2018, 12:25:20 pm
I’m having a really bad bout of dysphoria right now. I don’t think going back to work today helped, I feel like a massive phone wearing men’s clothes when I don’t feel like a man, looking at women dressed and looking like how I should look, then I look in the mirror and I am a man. Thought I had a hold over this!
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 03, 2018, 12:44:20 pm
I’m having a really bad bout of dysphoria right now. I don’t think going back to work today helped, I feel like a massive phone wearing men’s clothes when I don’t feel like a man, looking at women dressed and looking like how I should look, then I look in the mirror and I am a man. Thought I had a hold over this!
I feel the same way.. Stay strong we will overcome this

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Charlie Nicki on April 03, 2018, 02:50:21 pm
Not today but last night. I had feelings bottled up since last Saturday regarding my ex. Missing him.

Last night was rainy and I just felt sad all of the sudden. Was walking my way home and could barely hold in the tears, as soon as I got home I cried for like 2 hours. Had to get my ass up and went to the gym so I could get distracted.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on April 03, 2018, 02:52:32 pm
Well despite my wearing the bunny Onzie  Management was not impressed by me doing this and got in trouble for a rule that does not exist at least the residents were happy. So it was worth it in a way
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on April 03, 2018, 05:22:50 pm
Well despite my wearing the bunny Onzie  Management was not impressed by me doing this and got in trouble for a rule that does not exist at least the residents were happy. So it was worth it in a way
'
'
@ Natalie.Ashlyne:

Well, I think that the consensus here on the Forums is that your bunny outfit looked cute and very nice on you.  Plus it was a very festive outfit for Easter time.   Certainly there must have been lots of others co-workers and like you said, the residents that liked your attire.
 
Just who are the party-poopers at you work anyway?  Well, if they are the management as you stated, I guess that they are holding all the Aces in their hand so you MUST SUBMIT!!!!
Have a great evening and continue being the "fun" you.....   just don't get fired.

Hugs,
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sonja on April 03, 2018, 07:36:59 pm
Well despite my wearing the bunny Onzie  Management was not impressed by me doing this and got in trouble for a rule that does not exist at least the residents were happy. So it was worth it in a way
Natalie - I think you look CUTE!! ;) in your bunny outfit  x

Sonja.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on April 03, 2018, 07:47:26 pm
'
'
@ Natalie.Ashlyne:

Well, I think that the consensus here on the Forums is that your bunny outfit looked cute and very nice on you.  Plus it was a very festive outfit for Easter time.   Certainly there must have been lots of others co-workers and like you said, the residents that liked your attire.
 
Just who are the party-poopers at you work anyway?  Well, if they are the management as you stated, I guess that they are holding all the Aces in their hand so you MUST SUBMIT!!!!
Have a great evening and continue being the "fun" you.....   just don't get fired.

Hugs,
Danielle

Hi Danielle and thank you, you are sweet I found out it was a staff member that complained so management had to take action The problem was it was to tight on my chest area. I know who complained.  oh well it was worth it.

Natalie - I think you look CUTE!! ;) in your bunny outfit  x

Sonja.

Thank you Sonja :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 04, 2018, 11:01:34 am
Complete loss of interest in everything. Sat on a bench in the shopping centre looking at the wall all day, can't even be bothered to go for a ride or listen to music
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on April 04, 2018, 04:15:55 pm
Complete loss of interest in everything. Sat on a bench in the shopping centre looking at the wall all day, can't even be bothered to go for a ride or listen to music

I hate it when I feel like that but it happens way to often, I call it "The Blahs" and think it is depression related

Sometimes I won't even get out of bed and I'll stop caring for myself and not bath or eat or do much of anything or go anywhere

People even the police have come by just to see if I'm alive, that happened just this afternoon a neighbor stopped by and yeah I was still in bed staring at the ceiling but I put my robe on and answered the door

I appreciate it but it's also kind of embarrassing so I try to make a point of at least making a daily appearance before going back into hiding

Not really sure what to recommend but I usually try to find a distraction in keeping busy or visiting a friend

Hope you feel better soon

Hugs 
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Alaskan Danielle on April 04, 2018, 04:35:06 pm
Complete loss of interest in everything. Sat on a bench in the shopping centre looking at the wall all day, can't even be bothered to go for a ride or listen to music

@ Kim: I have been "there" too...  that is when I grab my go-to pick me up....
... CHOCOLATE in any shape or form!!

I trust that you get back to your normal self soon.   Sometimes when I am feeling down, that is a perfect time to do some in serious thinking just as long as I find a way to not get more depressed...  I think positive thoughts if I can.... there are always things in my that I can be most thankful for, I think on those things.   

Sometimes too, if the weather cooperates I go walking, jogging or running... or go to a gym to exercise... that usually clears my mind.

Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Dee Marshall on April 04, 2018, 06:51:23 pm
@ Kim: I have been "there" too...  that is when I grab my go-to pick me up....
... CHOCOLATE in any shape or form!!

I trust that you get back to your normal self soon.   Sometimes when I am feeling down, that is a perfect time to do some in serious thinking just as long as I find a way to not get more depressed...  I think positive thoughts if I can.... there are always things in my that I can be most thankful for, I think on those things.   

Sometimes too, if the weather cooperates I go walking, jogging or running... or go to a gym to exercise... that usually clears my mind.

Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle
Remember that at this post Easter time many (chocolate) bunnies are in need of good temporary homes.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Roll on April 04, 2018, 10:53:26 pm
Only one doing the hard part on a massive database project for my courses, 25% of grade with a brutal professor. Due Sunday. I'm freaking out and stressed and no one else seems to care too much, and only one person has even attempted to put in serious effort. I've spent 10+ solid hours today alone writing SQL, hours more to go by tomorrow or so, so that maybe, MAYBE someone puts together the presentation. I'm fully prepared to do that too though. Oh, and in addition to rest of coursework in this and other classes including other big projects.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on April 05, 2018, 03:47:58 am
I don't post on this thread often and I can't share many details, but I'm going through some horrible personal turmoil right now; ironically not even directly related to my transition.
Stuff I thought was truly in my past,  but someone just raked those coals over.
When it comes to emotionally based decisisions, I just paralyse.
I have a very important appointment with the GIC next week that I've been getting very anxious about, and the timing of this could not be worse.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on April 06, 2018, 09:03:19 pm
I am having a crappy day no matter what I wear or do I Just feel ugly and fat  lonely I cant seem to do or say anything right every thing is going wrong today really hating myself trying to stay away from any mirror
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 06, 2018, 09:22:39 pm
I am having a crappy day no matter what I wear or do I Just feel ugly and fat  lonely I cant seem to do or say anything right every thing is going wrong today really hating myself trying to stay away from any mirror
I get days like that too. Actually most days are and it's tough to the point I stopped going to work please hang in there. You are beautiful and cared about. Sorry if my response isn't worded in the best way but you're not alone

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on April 06, 2018, 10:19:59 pm
I have no running water in my apt. due to a leak in a water main and of course no-one will let me have a go at it even though I do have experience in such repairs

I guess I'll just have to sit tight and get a bit ripe while I hope someone in mgmnt will get it figured  :P   
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Gertrude on April 07, 2018, 08:40:17 am
Took a mental health day yesterday. I work in IT and part of my job is ensuring computers are in compliance. We have a professor or two that are under the impression that the computers they use are theirs and the university’s and don’t want us touching them. So, he needed and upgrade to office due to a dual factor authentication upgrade and wouldn’t let me put management software on the computer so as to install it. So he buys office on his own, which is out of compliance. Now he wants to migrate email from Apple Mail. My boss won’t tell him that he has to conform as he brings in grant money and likes to make a stink about it when he needs to get his way. For me, I don’t like enforcing policies unfairly. So some don’t have to follow the rules because the don’t want to. Why have policies? This ahole would probably be the first one to rail against white male privilege, but loves exercising his own privilege when it suits him. So I took a day off. After that, I’m not enforcing anything anymore. I don’t get paid enough to be duplicitous and I despise unfairness. So I needed a day away from being a civil Servant.


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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Megan. on April 07, 2018, 08:52:42 am
Took a mental health day yesterday. I work in IT and part of my job is ensuring computers are in compliance. We have a professor or two that are under the impression that the computers they use are theirs and the university’s and don’t want us touching them. So, he needed and upgrade to office due to a dual factor authentication upgrade and wouldn’t let me put management software on the computer so as to install it. So he buys office on his own, which is out of compliance. Now he wants to migrate email from Apple Mail. My boss won’t tell him that he has to conform as he brings in grant money and likes to make a stink about it when he needs to get his way. For me, I don’t like enforcing policies unfairly. So some don’t have to follow the rules because the don’t want to. Why have policies? This ahole would probably be the first one to rail against white male privilege, but loves exercising his own privilege when it suits him. So I took a day off. After that, I’m not enforcing anything anymore. I don’t get paid enough to be duplicitous and I despise unfairness. So I needed a day away from being a civil Servant.


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Hugs hun. I took a couple of those last year (for the first time ever).
You did the right thing, our mental health is very important. X

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: natalie.ashlyne on April 07, 2018, 01:35:10 pm
I get days like that too. Actually most days are and it's tough to the point I stopped going to work please hang in there. You are beautiful and cared about. Sorry if my response isn't worded in the best way but you're not alone

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Thank you Allison it cheered me up to read this today and what you said makes sense . Last night I just ended up crying my self to sleep. I am feeling a bit better  today.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: V M on April 09, 2018, 03:42:57 am
The water was turned back on for the time being over the weekend but I can still hear the leak spraying so I imagine it will be turned off again to make another attempt to fix it so I'm filling anything and everything that will hold water to make ready
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: MollyPants on April 09, 2018, 07:35:48 am
My new dresses got lost in the post which was rather annoying and it was just generally a miserable day on Sunday. I actually stayed round a friend's in Saturday night and I can remember now why I don't see them often. One guy is just so desperate to be macho and incrediblely rude and undermining to everyone.

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on April 12, 2018, 12:38:53 am
Loneliness made me unhappy today, but then again it makes me unhappy everyday. The fact that millions of people died today, yesterday, and tomorrow is also depressing me. I am unhappy that the dress I bought did not look as cool as I thought it would, but it is such a minor thing that it does not matter....at all.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Allison S on April 12, 2018, 02:28:08 am
Loneliness made me unhappy today, but then again it makes me unhappy everyday. The fact that millions of people died today, yesterday, and tomorrow is also depressing me. I am unhappy that the dress I bought did not look as cool as I thought it would, but it is such a minor thing that it does not matter....at all.

I'm sorry you feel that way. I know what that's like (feeling lonely). I opened up in my support group and that helped me a lot. I was already making friends with members in the group and they were inviting me to go places, but it was nice to have them their in person.
I get upset when a dress doesn't look right or the way I envision. So I completely understand that

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Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: big kim on April 12, 2018, 01:17:33 pm
Loneliness made me unhappy today, but then again it makes me unhappy everyday. Me too, 13 years since i was in a relationship. 10 years since I had a 2nd date with someone.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: Sarah_P on April 12, 2018, 05:37:24 pm
F-ing hackerbots hit our website *3* flipping times just today. Every time I'd get half way through cleaning up, they'd hit again. I wish I knew how they do it, but I'm not allowed full access. Sigh...
I think I've got it cleared out, for now.

Hey, don't you hacker types have anything better to do? Why don't you go pick on the Russians or something.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: BrandiYYC on April 12, 2018, 07:12:00 pm
Being called sir 3 times on the same call when calling tech support for my cellphone today. I corrected him each time, sigh. Nothing a peanut butter cookie dough blizzard from dairy queen couldn't fix though :)
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on April 13, 2018, 12:28:00 am
I'm sorry you feel that way. I know what that's like (feeling lonely). I opened up in my support group and that helped me a lot. I was already making friends with members in the group and they were inviting me to go places, but it was nice to have them their in person.
I get upset when a dress doesn't look right or the way I envision. So I completely understand that

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Having a support group must be nice. I have thought about joining one, but my social anxiety makes it difficult to talk to people, but it is great that you found new friends. The only way I could make a friend is if they approached me in an attempt to start a conversation. Unfortunately I come off a bit  standoffish so people tend to keep their distance. It may never happen for me and I have been trying to accept that fact but it still hurts.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: TicTac on April 13, 2018, 12:35:54 am
Loneliness made me unhappy today, but then again it makes me unhappy everyday. Me too, 13 years since i was in a relationship. 10 years since I had a 2nd date with someone.

I am sorry Kim  :( Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty. I hope you will find someone someday that will make you happy.
Title: Re: What made you unhappy today? 7.0
Post by: LaRell on April 13, 2018, 12:50:55 am
I am extremely unhappy, because my wife whom I love and care about very much and has been my greatest support in my transition, suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder, and is very narcissistic but is in extreme denial about it and often projects her own behaviors onto me as if I am the one doing to her exactly that which she is doing to me.  It is extremely messed up. And she will go from absolutely loving and adoring me one day and telling me she would not survive losing me......but then the very next day something will happen, and she does a complete 180, and will absolutely destroy me verbally.  This fight we are currently in has been going on for 3 days now.  The first day, part of her insults flung at me, is that she told me she is going to stop correctly gendering me and is going to start calling me "He and Him" and going to stop refering to me as her wife now.  Which is tremendously hurtful that she would use that against me just because she is upset.
   Then yesterday, she told me "I am sick of looking like a freak show when we are out in public together!&n