Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Blogs => Member Blogs => Topic started by: Pammie on February 24, 2020, 07:22:15 am

Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 24, 2020, 07:22:15 am
Well, I thought I’d like to inflict my daily life on the community - I mean (obviously) to perhaps provide some perspectives and encouragement by portraying my life some 2.5yrs after going full time. I’m lead to believe it won’t be mandatory for everyone to read this but I’ll be challenging that!

Today being a Monday i’m in the office and I have meetings with external suppliers so am aiming for smart - of course aiming and hitting might be 2 very different things!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200224/329e4cd86b05120e9ce846d3e224eccc.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CynthiaAnn on February 24, 2020, 07:29:30 am
Well, I thought I’d like to inflict my daily life on the community - I mean (obviously) to perhaps provide some perspectives and encouragement by portraying my life some 2.5yrs after going full time. I’m lead to believe it won’t be mandatory for everyone to read this but I’ll be challenging that!

Today being a Monday i’m in the office and I have meetings with external suppliers so am aiming for smart - of course aiming and hitting might be 2 very different things!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200224/329e4cd86b05120e9ce846d3e224eccc.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

What a lovely picture @Pammie, so professional  :) Indeed you are benefiting from living "full time" and working as your true self, nothing better  :)

Hope your day is a good one

Hugs

Cyndi
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on February 24, 2020, 10:47:56 am
I'll look forward to it, Pammie.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: MikaelaA on February 24, 2020, 11:04:14 am
You're looking good Pammie !!!  Thank you for inviting us along.  I can't wait to go full-time myself.  I look forward to your extensive knowledge and sharing in your journey.

Hugs,

Michelle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on February 24, 2020, 11:24:08 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I am so very glad to see that you are starting your "all new blog" ....   
I love following other members stories and life endeavors as they navigate the pothole filled road of transition.

As you post good news we will all rejoice with you, we are your biggest fans.....   and when your reporting not-so-good news we will lend you our ears and give you our shoulders to lean on and to vent on.   We are always rooting for your happiness and your success.

Please keep your updates coming along with pictures as you feel so inclined to share them.

HUGS and as always, best wishes.
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 24, 2020, 01:45:57 pm
Today was an insightful day, I was reminded how much I have evolved - not just mentally but physically and emotionally also. It’s part of my job to ask lots of questions when we get suppliers in bidding for work and before I went full time I worried about that but now it’s just BAU (Business As Usual) and I just do it. Don’t get me wrong, my voice is still a work in progress but every day is 20 or 30 opportunities to practice and I know it’s come a long way.
A recurring theme for me is waking up and feeling so excited at another day just being myself. I’d sorted out my outfit for today last night but changed my mind and went for something else - I have lots of nice clothes and often change my mind!
I feel so right in my shoes (well, boots today!) and that ever present feeling of completeness and contentment is a powerful weapon! Today I felt good, a bit more time taken on my make up and felt like I just was looking good! Memo to self - must look up the word modesty, I think it’s at the back next to humility!
I had a tough evening yesterday with family issues but that’s life and i’m a strong woman and I can handle it.
I’m looking forward to daily blogs on here - hope they don’t get too boring!
Here’s today’s pic again!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200224/2179bcc9b1b76e28ccd3df80302afeae.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Jennifer1975 on February 24, 2020, 05:03:53 pm
Today was an insightful day, I was reminded how much I have evolved - not just mentally but physically and emotionally also. It’s part of my job to ask lots of questions when we get suppliers in bidding for work and before I went full time I worried about that but now it’s just BAU (Business As Usual) and I just do it. Don’t get me wrong, my voice is still a work in progress but every day is 20 or 30 opportunities to practice and I know it’s come a long way.
A recurring theme for me is waking up and feeling so excited at another day just being myself. I’d sorted out my outfit for today last night but changed my mind and went for something else - I have lots of nice clothes and often change my mind!
I feel so right in my shoes (well, boots today!) and that ever present feeling of completeness and contentment is a powerful weapon! Today I felt good, a bit more time taken on my make up and felt like I just was looking good! Memo to self - must look up the word modesty, I think it’s at the back next to humility!
I had a tough evening yesterday with family issues but that’s life and i’m a strong woman and I can handle it.
I’m looking forward to daily blogs on here - hope they don’t get too boring!
Here’s today’s pic again!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200224/2179bcc9b1b76e28ccd3df80302afeae.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

Your blog will be interesting to follow  :) You have confidence! And you voice will be great.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 25, 2020, 01:20:01 am
Your blog will be interesting to follow  :) You have confidence! And you voice will be great.
Awwww thanks! Sometimes I worry about the depth of my confidence - as I often post on here i’m very very conscious about passing and if I was truly confident I’d be far more sanguine as some on here are
What I definitely am is happy being me though!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Allie Jayne on February 25, 2020, 01:46:12 am
Pammie, it's about time! You have been piggybacking for too long, and we are all interested in your amazing life. I will be looking for more entries!


Hugs,

Allie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 25, 2020, 02:31:44 am
Pammie, it's about time! You have been piggybacking for too long, and we are all interested in your amazing life. I will be looking for more entries!


Hugs,

Allie
Hee hee


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on February 25, 2020, 03:55:54 am
Hi Pammie!
I like how it shows through your smile always.  And how you have yourself put together in the work photo.
Not boring, oh no no. 
Excited to follow your all new blog :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 25, 2020, 03:49:38 pm
Good evening all!
Another long day today! I work near Manchester airport and like to walk into town and get the train to the airport. I get 25 mins chill time to enjoy a coffee on the train, do a sudoku on my phone and touch up my make up before getting to work (I use my phone camera to check my make up - aren’t phone cameras useful!).
2 supplier presentations today so 7 hrs of meetings - that’s an awful lot of voice practice!
Quite pleased with today’s look!
It was 8 before I got home having walked back from the city to home (3.5km) but it’s Pancake Tuesday so made pancakes! Mmmmmm
Hopefully the steps will counter the pancake calories!  - or not

Feeling good as usual and haven’t considered once today if I was passing - I just knew I was

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200225/c5f18e4da125b78616c967dd9ca43b5b.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on February 25, 2020, 03:56:21 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
Thanks for sharing your good report.... it sure is nice to not have to worry or be concerned about not passing.... it is definitely a wonderful feeling.

Yes indeed, who needs mirrors, the cell phone camera is great as a personal mirror, a magnifying glass (App) and I use it to look behind me at someone if I don't want to be obvious about it.

All of that walking will certainly help keep your figure trim.

I didn't do pancakes this morning but I did waffles, same batter, so does that count? 
Raspberries and whipped cream on top.

Thank you keeping me and the rest of your followers updated....

HUGS and best wishes.
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CynthiaAnn on February 25, 2020, 04:02:43 pm
Very nice ensemble today Pammie  :)

Your posting about walking the streets of Manchester, brings back memories of the Salford Quays area, and walking those streets around the stadium and of course the many train stations there.

Pancakes sound great !

C
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on February 25, 2020, 04:11:19 pm
Very nice ensemble today Pammie  :)

Your posting about walking the streets of Manchester, brings back memories of the Salford Quays area, and walking those streets around the stadium and of course the many train stations there.

Pancakes sound great !

C

Waffles are good,  pancakes are good.  How about crepes?

McDonald’s pancakes I believe are frozen then reheated.

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 25, 2020, 04:15:30 pm
Very nice ensemble today Pammie  :)

Your posting about walking the streets of Manchester, brings back memories of the Salford Quays area, and walking those streets around the stadium and of course the many train stations there.

Pancakes sound great !

C
Salford quays are my long walk destination - about 11km round trip with a coffee in the Mall as my reward! Mainly a weekend thing though!
I think pancakes, waffles and crepes all count today!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 26, 2020, 03:11:51 pm
Well, physically and emotionally some days are harder than others! Not my best day really.
A little background, I am full time for
2.5 years now, I have 4 children but my eldest, Siobhan, died suddenly last July aged just 34.
This happened the day before my younger son Jack got married. That was an incredibly difficult day and I still don’t know how I got through it (mainly by finding dome alone time 30 or do times during the day and just crying),
I’m still emotionally fragile and the grief is often impossible to handle.
Anyway, my original plan was to get a lovely new pic taken at the wedding of me with my 4 kids but that never came to pass of course.
This week my daughter in law got a photo shopped to generate a pic from the wedding with Siobhan photo shopped in. I love it but the only pic from the wedding of me and the other three also had Hannah (Jacks wife) on and the lady who created the pic swapped her out and put Siobhan in. I now have the pic I thought I could never have but my son and his wife chose to get upset about it. There are times when I just wish my family could understand the pain in my heart
Work wise two more supplier presentations today but finished now, finally!  So tired but glad that’s over.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200226/a1b67b8166afbf274f639c4a7e8980ee.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on February 26, 2020, 03:29:23 pm
Pammie, we are an ocean apart and have never met. 
But my heart aches a little about Siobhan, and I am still sorry for your loss, mother.

Your photos on this blog thread and elsewhere make me smile. 
It's neat to know that a woman like you is out there somewhere presenting suppliers :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 26, 2020, 03:42:41 pm
Pammie, we are an ocean apart and have never met. 
But my heart aches a little about Siobhan, and I am still sorry for your loss, mother.

Your photos on this blog thread and elsewhere make me smile. 
It's neat to know that a woman like you is out there somewhere presenting suppliers :)
Thanks Maddie! I love how supportive everyone on here is xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Allie Jayne on February 26, 2020, 03:47:08 pm
Pammie, that is your special photo and nobody else needs to like it! If it is that important to your  son and his wife you could have anther photo made including you all. I was so touched seeing that photo as I cherish my children above all, and I can imagine what it means to you.

Hugs,

Allie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 26, 2020, 03:50:25 pm
Pammie, that is your special photo and nobody else needs to like it! If it is that important to your  son and his wife you could have anther photo made including you all. I was so touched seeing that photo as I cherish my children above all, and I can imagine what it means to you.

Hugs,

Allie
Thanks Allie! x


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 27, 2020, 01:25:55 pm
Good evening!
I had a better day today - worked from home and my Andy came over for a while too! Outrageous if anyone is suggesting that the working from home bit may have been lacking the first word during that visit! (Outrageous but not necessarily completely wrong!)
As I wasn’t going out (I had a walk later in the afternoon) and Andy was coming over I dressed a little minimalist
I have a great working relationship as i often work late in the evening and sometimes at weekends and in exchange I take breaks when I want!
90 minutes sofa time was much more fun than sitting behind my laptop!
Andy makes me feel so feminine and is so appreciative - I never even think about the trans bit - i’m just a woman - no prefix required!
Sadly he couldn’t stay which was a shame as a lie down would have been nice
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200227/0dcc641f3c0f4b6560bb473d6f210dd8.jpg)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 28, 2020, 09:42:54 am
Good afternoon!
It’s Friday - yay!!!
For me Friday means driving 130 miles from my home in Manchester upto North-East England to help look after my grandchildren. I’ll drive home again Sunday afternoon. Really it’s a win - win because my lovely son-in-law gets some help and I get to spend time with the 2 boys (Jake is 6 and Sam is 5) who do so remind me of their beautiful mum Siobhan- my daughter.
One of the nice things about my job is we finish at 1 on a Friday!
Friday in the office is dress down day too.
The drive up always seems to include 5 minutes of tears when I suddenly remember that my little girl is dead - grief can suck all the joy out of living sometimes. (https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200228/f22ab72d7d42287cfa50b32dfa7800b3.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: MikaelaA on February 28, 2020, 10:00:46 am
Hi Pammie,

Sorry for the loss of your daughter.  It's never easy to lose a loved one that you care so much about.  At least you will be able to spend some time with your grandchildren which has a part of your daughter in each one of them.  I hope you have a safe drive up north and able to enjoy your time with them.  Have a great weekend !!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on February 28, 2020, 10:06:54 am
Huggs Pammie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on February 28, 2020, 10:35:28 am
Hey Pammie.   

I think it's great that you have started your own thread. I am so sorry to read about your loss.  That kind of loss leaves such a large hole in you heart but it so great to read that you are still capable of having so much joy in your life.  That is huge.

I also love your photos and your great smile!

Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 28, 2020, 10:39:21 am
Hi Pammie,

Sorry for the loss of your daughter.  It's never easy to lose a loved one that you care so much about.  At least you will be able to spend some time with your grandchildren which has a part of your daughter in each one of them.  I hope you have a safe drive up north and able to enjoy your time with them.  Have a great weekend !!!
Awww thanks! I’m here with them now and being as annoying as only a Gran can be!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 28, 2020, 10:39:46 am
Hey Pammie.   

I think it's great that you have started your own thread. I am so sorry to read about your loss.  That kind of loss leaves such a large hole in you heart but it so great to read that you are still capable of having so much joy in your life.  That is huge.

I also love your photos and your great smile!

Hugs,

Emma
Thanks Emma! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 28, 2020, 10:40:26 am
Huggs Pammie
Thanks Julie - hugs are my favourite thing in the whole world! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on February 29, 2020, 11:45:17 am
Happy Saturday everyone!
Up in Teesside looking after some of my grandkids and a family meal out to celebrate my oldest granddaughters 12th birthday!
It’s very hectic and I have 3 of my grandkids staying over tonight!
It’s good to have family time even if that can come with squabbling built in!

I live in a paradox, may be we all do! On the one hand it’s important to me that people understand i’m not Paul in a dress (i’m really not, i’m different in a lot of ways) but at the same time i’m trying to reassure people that i’m still me! My younger daughter Grace wants me to be the same person I used to be so she can feel like she’s not lost her dad - sigh


(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200229/a6d21a97fdbb58c2d689c695012fe7a5.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CynthiaAnn on February 29, 2020, 06:24:05 pm
It’s very hectic and I have 3 of my grandkids staying over tonight!
It’s good to have family time even if that can come with squabbling built in!


How fun having the grand kids over Pammie  :) I am envious, our daughters not there yet, maybe someday.

Hope your youngest daughter can come around someday, it's hard.

Hugs

Cyndi

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 01, 2020, 03:14:06 pm
I think most people who have read posts from me would acknowledge they are, in the main, quite positive. Sometimes I think I try to represent the positives about transitioning and how amazing life can be. But, you know, every one of us has challenges. Some days I cry for hours, partly about my daughters death but also about how my surviving children take their anger and grief out on me. I’m the punchbag and my transitioning the bulls eye they aim for.
My younger daughter can be so vicious and unyielding and sometimes makes me feel like i’m evil and horrible.
Transitioning and becoming my true self opened a huge reservoir of strength and fortitude but it now seems it’s barely enough. I grieve for my daughter while I have to defend myself. Tonight I have had 30 or do text messages from my younger daughter basically telling me how evil I am and how I’ve killed her dad.
My heart hurts so much and tonight’s smile is skin deep

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200301/249d29e08dc04c41f5dc972a79a92cc8.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 01, 2020, 07:34:01 pm
Again Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 01, 2020, 08:08:51 pm
Again Hugs
Thanks Julie -I seem to be needing them this week!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 02, 2020, 02:17:29 pm
Recovery day today. I’ve kept off the chocolate, been for a run and a longish walk and 30 minutes with my kettlebell - oh and a days work! All of that to try not to think about what my daughter said to me last night.
Head been a bit confused today. I went into work mega early so that i could go to the gym, afterwards went up to the office only to realise I hadn’t brought my laptop to work.
So ended up going back home and working from there. Oh dear.

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200302/706777a438c84226d126edd4e0fb6b15.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on March 02, 2020, 02:35:03 pm
@Pammie
Dar Pammie:
I am enjoying your daily updates and you new posted pictures...   
...   I have to tell you that all of them are wonderful to see... BUT this last one of yours is certainly near the top of my favorite list.
 
You look terrific, thank you for sharing.

HUGS and best wishes,
Danielle

Recovery day today. I’ve kept off the chocolate, been for a run and a longish walk and 30 minutes with my kettlebell - oh and a days work! All of that to try not to think about what my daughter said to me last night.
Head been a bit confused today. I went into work mega early so that i could go to the gym, afterwards went up to the office only to realise I hadn’t brought my laptop to work.
So ended up going back home and working from there. Oh dear.

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200302/706777a438c84226d126edd4e0fb6b15.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 02, 2020, 02:37:59 pm
@Pammie
Dar Pammie:
I am enjoying your daily updates and you new posted pictures...   
...   I have to tell you that all of them are wonderful to see... BUT this last one of yours is certainly near the top of my favorite list.
 
You look terrific, thank you for sharing.

HUGS and best wishes,
Danielle
Awwww thank you so much Danielle xx. Hugs for you too


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 02, 2020, 03:53:06 pm
Hugs I hope today is going better for you
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 03, 2020, 01:44:05 am
Hugs I hope today is going better for you
It Was a little better thanks Julie. Loving my hugs xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 03, 2020, 01:41:44 pm
So, I did an emotional reset today and gave myself a proverbial kick up the bum!
Got up at 5am with a positive attitude and went for a 6km run. Today I was at a user group conference and was on top form! I even got the end of day award for most contributions! Felt good all day and was looking pretty good too!
Now cooking tea and then chilling!
Positive is my natural state I believe!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200303/8ad38ed7a995d392d6f90c3fdd5deda0.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on March 03, 2020, 01:49:51 pm
Good on you Pammie, I run or ride to get away from it all, can't beat it.  Lovely outfit there as well btw.

~Jenny~
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 03, 2020, 02:27:16 pm
Good on you Pammie, I run or ride to get away from it all, can't beat it.  Lovely outfit there as well btw.

~Jenny~
Awww thanks! Ride as in horses? My daughter has a horse.


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 03, 2020, 02:56:05 pm
Hugs Glad your day is going better.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 03, 2020, 03:03:21 pm
Hugs Glad your day is going better.
Thanks Julie! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 03, 2020, 03:05:21 pm
I think we all need to lose our selves doing something we enjoy, for me its cooking or making things like clocks ,lights and things out of scrap.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 03, 2020, 03:18:47 pm
I think we all need to lose our selves doing something we enjoy, for me its cooking or making things like clocks ,lights and things out of scrap.
Totally agree! I find running very therapeutic


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CynthiaAnn on March 03, 2020, 04:33:38 pm
Totally agree! I find running very therapeutic

Agreed, hiking in a beautiful place does it for me, or listening to music, or both at the same time as in bluetooth headphones on the trail  :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 03, 2020, 04:50:27 pm
Agreed, hiking in a beautiful place does it for me, or listening to music, or both at the same time as in bluetooth headphones on the trail  :)
Yeh, I always have mine with me. Running requires Queen greatest hits, walking either audiobook or tunes (Billy Joel, Elvis, 80’s compilations or Ed Sheeran generally)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on March 03, 2020, 10:19:34 pm
Positive is my natural state I believe!

 :) :) :) :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on March 03, 2020, 11:18:56 pm
Awww thanks! Ride as in horses? My daughter has a horse.


I opened the door and the light shone in

I love horses but they kinda scare me as well! :-\  Just cycling locally and running a domain, it's perfect 8)

~Jenny~
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 04, 2020, 03:32:37 am
I love horses but they kinda scare me as well! :-\  Just cycling locally and running a domain, it's perfect 8)

~Jenny~
Great stuff! Well done.


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 04, 2020, 04:59:40 pm
Good evening everyone!
Much more positive day today! Pushed myself on the treadmill this morning and managed a new pb for 5km which was a good start to my day!
Work was manic but I felt good, in control and looking good - gee, I gotta get the hang of this modesty thing!
A few sad moments through the day as there is every day now - miss my little girl so much and the world doesn’t contain enough positivity to balance that.

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200304/71d847bbac9ac5f2e8d2a1db4e2b1ac7.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CynthiaAnn on March 04, 2020, 06:58:41 pm
I gotta get the hang of this modesty thing!

You're getting it  ;) Nice outfit.

Hope the grieving phase can subside (it never really goes away)

Hugs

C
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 05, 2020, 05:52:47 am
You're getting it  ;) Nice outfit.

Hope the grieving phase can subside (it never really goes away)

Hugs

C
Thank you!
As for grieving it’s a case of coping strategies really - it can’t ever go away but maybe will get triggered a little less often at some point x


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 05, 2020, 03:58:09 pm
Good evening!
2 hr pampering after work - oh how I love my hairdresser pampering sessions - hair, nails and toes!
I can just relax so much - a little slice of heaven!
Followed up with a drink with my lovely boyfriend

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200305/a7121045d084a7d8897603e5b1b42049.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 05, 2020, 04:10:10 pm
Looking good hun
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 05, 2020, 04:51:21 pm
Looking good hun
Why thank you! A visit to my lovely stylist and friend Michelle always leaves me feeling a million dollars - I try to bottle the feeling to have it always with me!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 05, 2020, 04:55:26 pm
As they say around here you do scrub up well dear, XXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on March 05, 2020, 05:24:25 pm
Good evening!
2 hr pampering after work - oh how I love my hairdresser pampering sessions - hair, nails and toes!
I can just relax so much - a little slice of heaven!
Followed up with a drink with my lovely boyfriend

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200305/a7121045d084a7d8897603e5b1b42049.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

I know what you mean, always feel better after a stylist session, we all need them, very important.  I can talk it up a bit though which always makes me feel a bit guilty afterwards!  Your new do isn't too far away from what I'm getting Pammie, with the side parting etc, very nice, and I do like that colour as well.  Unfortunately I have to stop my mani and pedi sessions and keep it to basics for the budget this year but that's just the way it goes :)

~Jenny~
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Allie Jayne on March 05, 2020, 07:17:43 pm
Just lovely Pammie!

Hugs,

Allie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 06, 2020, 02:10:23 am
Just lovely Pammie!

Hugs,

Allie
Thanks Allie, hugs right back! X


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 07, 2020, 12:15:38 pm
I’ve had connection problems getting onto Susan’s both through the app and the browser (tried safari and chrome) hence I’ve been quiet!
Back in Teesside helping out with various grandkids as usual - it’s so lovely to be such a big part of their lives!
I stay at my daughter and son-in-law’s house which helps me feel closer to her

Yesterday’s pic - always think these trousers look good and emphasise my slimmer (than previously) waist
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200307/615a823917c43e425b6511e76921ac40.jpg)

Today’s very scruffy pic!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200307/22205c76fafb6f3ed02d26e9b23eb947.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 07, 2020, 04:18:53 pm
Beautiful, just beautiful.  Thank you Pammie:)
Thank you! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on March 07, 2020, 04:40:48 pm
Good evening!
2 hr pampering after work - oh how I love my hairdresser pampering sessions - hair, nails and toes!
I can just relax so much - a little slice of heaven!
Followed up with a drink with my lovely boyfriend

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200305/a7121045d084a7d8897603e5b1b42049.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

Pammie,

You have a lovely hairstyle and look.   :)

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 07, 2020, 05:18:09 pm
Pammie,

You have a lovely hairstyle and look.   :)

Chrissy
Thanks Chrissy! My hairdresser was the second person I came out to (outside of therapists) and has become a very important person in my life! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on March 08, 2020, 04:25:28 am
Pammie,

You have a lovely hairstyle and look.   :)

Agree! 
I'm also a fan
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 08, 2020, 07:02:16 am
Agree! 
I'm also a fan
xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 08, 2020, 02:01:35 pm
Busy Sunday as usual, helping my son in law move into his new house (sad because it’s his not his and Siobhan’s)  - 2 dump runs and 3 trips with boxes - carrying boxes is really hard because I lost much of the little muscle mass I had - then the 130 miles drive home and meet my boyfriend for an hour for coffee and cake
Today’s look could best be described as relaxed!

Sunday evening is chill time and a bath very much on the cards!
Ps I did manage an 8.5km run this morning too!

Suddenly feeling really sad tonight and got my photo  album out - I know it won’t help but can’t helping looking at Siobhan’s pics - especially the early years when we lived in Holland and every pic features the most wonderful smile

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200308/1c199b02796d11b8db4e74de441b1bdb.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 08, 2020, 02:04:48 pm
Hugs Pam, she is with you in memories XXXXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 08, 2020, 02:30:37 pm
Hugs Pam, she is with you in memories XXXXXXX
Thanks Davina xxx. I do try to focus on all those wonderful memories and on her 2 little boys who I treasure so much but grief is a vicious enemy and you never know when it will strike


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 09, 2020, 03:57:46 pm
Just a normal day in Pammie world. Up at 5 to go to the gym at work b4 starting work. I was hoping it would set me up for the day but it actually tired me out. Oh well, it was a good plan!  Did manage 5.25km in 25:30 minutes.
Lots of meetings afterwards and lots of hugs from my girlfriends at work who are also fb friends and saw I’d had a tough evening yesterday. Love my hugs!
Home and photo album time again to bring back good memories of my little girl who always smiled.
Transition was a breeze compared to the challenge of coping with grief - it reminds me about perspective but i’m not trying to extrapolate that to all my friends on here as plenty had and have massive challenges to transition xx

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200309/1a8698d29d57d4e4e703338e30aa8a9c.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 10, 2020, 04:05:58 pm
Happy Tuesday!
Another early start and long day but nice chilled evening time to consider life. Thanks in large part to the perspectives I’ve managed to generate from Susan’s Place I have a really good feeling about the progress I’ve made over the last 2.5 years and the challenges I’ve already overcome.
Life still has challenges - not least getting my surviving daughter on board again -  but every day is amazing and I just love being me. Even having to wait for GCS I can handle fine. I miss my Siobhan every day but I know she would want me to remember her with smiles and to continue to enjoy life.
I have so many blessings to count and my lovely boyfriend Andy is chief among them.
There are so many lovely people on here and I feel part of so many stories. Big hugs to everyone

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200310/74d788ecabe87b15db318568728bfb33.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CynthiaAnn on March 10, 2020, 04:58:12 pm

I have so many blessings to count and my lovely boyfriend Andy is chief among them.


Gratitude can mitigate sorrow over time.

Happy Tuesday Pammie

Hugs

Cyndi
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 10, 2020, 05:13:51 pm
Gratitude can mitigate sorrow over time.

Happy Tuesday Pammie

Hugs

Cyndi
Yes, I think positive things always help. Thanks Cyndi!
Love hugs, here’s some for you too


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 11, 2020, 12:20:21 pm
On the train today. Chill time is great!
Feeling better today and positive too. And looking good of course!
Worked from home in the morning and my Andy came over for an hour which was great! Though longer would have been even better!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200311/68e224dab5a693e1f5995c7f0ae5f149.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on March 12, 2020, 10:54:25 am
 :'looking great Pammie.  Nice outfit at work!
Is Andy your man friend guy?  Sounds like fun
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 12, 2020, 11:25:46 am
Very nice Pam, glad your felling more positive
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 12, 2020, 11:26:42 am
:'looking great Pammie.  Nice outfit at work!
Is Andy your man friend guy?  Sounds like fun
Yes, Andy is my boyfriend, been together for 29 months now. He’s a total darling!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 12, 2020, 11:27:04 am
Very nice Pam, glad your felling more positive
Thanks!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 12, 2020, 11:34:09 am
Today was one of those days where work just sucked! It happens!
Morning run was tough for some reason, not helped by my normal run being blocked by works so ended up doing 6.5km but not very fast.
Work i’m just going to skim over - it was, it sucked and I’ve headed home early.
Off to meet my Andy for an hour tonight then the weekly 130 mile drive to Teesside to help out with grandkids. Going up early this week because tomorrow there is a funeral to go to. The first since my little girls so it ain’t gonna be fun! (Of course, they never are). My poor son in law, lost his wife and now his mum - a lot to handle!
Last year he had 2 Mother’s Days to organise and this year none - really emphasises the losses.
Such a lovely guy and a fantastic dad. Xx

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200312/a138727546d5074fcaeb04155e6bd5f4.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on March 12, 2020, 04:08:41 pm
Pammie it was great to get caught up on your thread. 

I agree hairdressers make a huge difference in how you look and how you feel.  I am glad that you are taking every opportunity to feel better and live life well in spite of your losses.  It sounds like you are surrounded by wonderful people.

It is so excellent to read!


Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 12, 2020, 07:53:24 pm
Pammie it was great to get caught up on your thread. 

I agree hairdressers make a huge difference in how you look and how you feel.  I am glad that you are taking every opportunity to feel better and live life well in spite of your losses.  It sounds like you are surrounded by wonderful people.

It is so excellent to read!


Hugs,

Emma
Awwwww thanks hunny xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 13, 2020, 02:51:28 pm
Difficult day today but one that was tremendously affirming. Both for my identity but also a wonderful affirmation of the power of love.
My son in laws family just made me so a part of them and embraced me emotionally.
Funerals are never easy (and this one took me back to my daughters funeral so was anything but) but the wakes like today are so incredibly positive.
I’m truly humbled by how I’ve been treated today and feeling so right. I’m whole and i’m me even though I am still pre-op.
Hugs to all my wonderful trans sisters and brothers xxx
Ps no prizes for my photos, i’m a bit rubbish but it’s not the thing to take selfies at the actual funeral so I’ve just taken it now

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200313/5c7a65cf8c4ab54190f5847e5f933bc8.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 14, 2020, 01:45:26 pm
Not been feeling great today but it’s weekend so i’m with the grandkids so busy busy busy!
Farm visit this afternoon and now bath, tea, tv and stories.
The afternoon with my elder son, his wife, 2 of my granddaughters and the 2 boys i’m looking after was so lovely but reminded me that my beautiful little girl Siobhan has gone
A night with my photo album I predict (and some wine) xx

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200314/f2e19247030a1f018777fd606df3f486.jpg)
Me with my elder son Antony


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 15, 2020, 08:17:13 am
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 15, 2020, 08:37:06 am
Hugs
And hugs right back - the world is a better place for hugs! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 16, 2020, 11:35:53 am
Another tough day in what has been a tough tie for the whole world! I didn’t sleep much last night and felt ill all day but i’m feeling a bit better now
Work is just bizarre as nobody quite knows what is going to happen when.

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200316/2e73ab9b9be2eb2a782cb01031ff336a.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Allie Jayne on March 16, 2020, 03:14:24 pm
Pammie, I think we are all in a state of shock over this virus, and I admit that only a few days ago I wasn’t that worried about it. Try to keep your morale up as I believe when you are run down you are more susceptible. Are you going to isolate at all?

Hugs,

Allie   
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 16, 2020, 03:18:49 pm
Pammie, I think we are all in a state of shock over this virus, and I admit that only a few days ago I wasn’t that worried about it. Try to keep your morale up as I believe when you are run down you are more susceptible. Are you going to isolate at all?

Hugs,

Allie   
Well, at the moment I don’t have Coronavirus symptoms just a more general feeling poorly kinda thing.


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 16, 2020, 03:56:15 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 16, 2020, 04:04:51 pm
Hugs
I so love my hugs


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on March 16, 2020, 04:06:12 pm
I so love my hugs



Hugs  :)

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 16, 2020, 05:12:43 pm


Hugs  :)

Chrissy
Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 17, 2020, 04:46:49 pm
Reality check today. Working from home and will be for the foreseeable future! That’s OK but, of course, it’s a very isolated thing. Andy cake over for an hour today but he is a carer for his 89 year old dad and may soon not be able to come over - suddenly my world is collapsing inwards. My weekend trips to Teesside to look after grandchildren will also be under threat I fear. It’s all pretty horrible tbh!
It’s hard to see and end in sight too. We have entered a phase without having defined any exit criteria and that’s a little worrying for me.
Oh well, at least I CAN wfh so i’m lucky!
Hope everyone’s ok. Hugs for all! Xx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200317/f4b1470969b049d5dd1117ee633b8592.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 17, 2020, 05:30:03 pm
Hugs hang tight this corona virus scare will eventually blow over.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 17, 2020, 05:40:31 pm
Hugs hang tight this corona virus scare will eventually blow over.
Thanks Julie, that’s what I keep telling myself too! X


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 18, 2020, 04:26:51 pm
Oh well, some weeks are just best written off. First day of home working (for the foreseeable future) and I’ve not handled it well. Haven’t felt well for weeks now and probably exhausted with my every weekend 300 mile round trip to help with grandkids.
Not sure when I’ll get to see my Andy next either! Still, enough wingeing ! 
On the plus side there are many things - I get to be me every day, I have lots of nice clothes to wear and I have a very loving fella who is constantly thinking of me. I’m a lucky girl.
I did manage a run this evening but it was hard work and I’ve got a 5am start tomorrow

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200318/7541b56ac95c8c1705e4abe955113448.jpg)


(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200318/f3513eb9fe1af1e6107f6387cd077914.jpg)

My new running gear


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 18, 2020, 04:49:52 pm
Hugs hang in there Pammie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 18, 2020, 04:55:43 pm
Hope you don't go stir crazy , take the time to recover as I am sure you will get more spare time. We are still flat out at work, MOTs services and all. Power cut this after noon so no lifts working ( 2 phases shorted under ground) but still have lights and sockets and we made more than what was set. Electricity folk were setting up a geny when I left, day off tomorrow anyway. Look after your self , stay well XXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 18, 2020, 05:19:00 pm
Hope you don't go stir crazy , take the time to recover as I am sure you will get more spare time. We are still flat out at work, MOTs services and all. Power cut this after noon so no lifts working ( 2 phases shorted under ground) but still have lights and sockets and we made more than what was set. Electricity folk were setting up a geny when I left, day off tomorrow anyway. Look after your self , stay well XXXXX
Thanks! You too! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 18, 2020, 05:19:29 pm
Hugs hang in there Pammie
Thanks Julie! Hugs right back! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 19, 2020, 06:34:39 pm
130 mile trip to Teesside done after work (from home) - wonder how long I’ll be allowed to do it?
This new home working stuff is weird.
Nice evening meal with my fella first was nice


(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200319/2550242c2ce247d8a9eb989536f8c36c.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on March 19, 2020, 06:40:04 pm
Just poking my nose in to say hi. :)

That and, well, I notice a distinct lack of toilet paper in that cubicle behind that beautiful woman in the photo. Methinks someone needs to go out and panic buy some, stat!

:)

*hugs*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 19, 2020, 07:22:16 pm
Just poking my nose in to say hi. :)

That and, well, I notice a distinct lack of toilet paper in that cubicle behind that beautiful woman in the photo. Methinks someone needs to go out and panic buy some, stat!

:)

*hugs*
Hee hee - good point!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 20, 2020, 12:08:37 pm
My little grandsons birthday today - 7 - his first birthday without his mum. Still going to make it a special day for the little trooper
Feeling better today too.

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200320/fb35b72d5a267cfbb72d4c71432aff60.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on March 20, 2020, 12:17:52 pm
@Pammie Hello to Grandma Pammie....   quite nice to to be with your 7 year old grandson at his birthday....   what did Grandma get him for his birthday gift???

You are looking really good Pammie.  As I mentioned in a previous post on your thread, I am really enjoying your frequent pictures that you post !!!   

Thank you for sharing and keeping me and the rest of your followers updated with your transition life endeavors.
HUGS and more HUGS,
Danielle


My little grandsons birthday today - 7 - his first birthday without his mum. Still going to make it a special day for the little trooper
Feeling better today too.

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200320/fb35b72d5a267cfbb72d4c71432aff60.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 20, 2020, 12:33:39 pm
@Pammie Hello to Grandma Pammie....   quite nice to to be with your 7 year old grandson at his birthday....   what did Grandma get him for his birthday gift???

You are looking really good Pammie.  As I mentioned in a previous post on your thread, I am really enjoying your frequent pictures that you post !!!   

Thank you for sharing and keeping me and the rest of your followers updated with your transition life endeavors.
HUGS and more HUGS,
Danielle

Awww thanks Danielle - big hugs right back


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 20, 2020, 12:54:50 pm
Have a great time dear and not to much birthday cake!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 20, 2020, 01:20:08 pm
Have a great time dear and not to much birthday cake!!!
Oops, too late! Chocolate caterpillar cake - just soooooo scrumptious!
My 7.7km run this morning almost makes up for it


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 20, 2020, 05:20:10 pm
Inspired by Ashley I thought I’d go for attitude

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200320/b771fb629cd744ee314009a726355c01.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on March 21, 2020, 08:25:16 am
Love the look Pammie and the cool attitude.  Hugs, Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 21, 2020, 05:03:48 pm
Love the look Pammie and the cool attitude.  Hugs, Emma
Thanks Emma !
I went for attitude again tonight!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200321/821a81dc62eec0b62c95b214b7d559fe.jpg)

A real rollercoaster day today!
Got loads done helping my son in law finishing off the house move then went to my daughters graveside and stood and cried for 10 minutes then went back to my grandsons 7th birthday party then cooked tea for 7 - so many emotions and i’m drained now xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 21, 2020, 08:17:13 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 22, 2020, 03:40:28 am
Don't over do things and stay well XXXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 22, 2020, 01:18:41 pm
Hugs
Hugs right back Hulu’s! xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 22, 2020, 01:19:04 pm
Don't over do things and stay well XXXXXX
Thanks and you too! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 22, 2020, 01:22:42 pm
First Mother’s Day for my smallest grandsons without their mum - heartbreaking. My little girl robbed of so much.
I did my best to carry on and raise a smile and managed it for a while but back home alone now and really very very sad

Managed a quick smile first thing.....
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200322/3d2e2f28bd218960235a1e14f451ae6f.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 23, 2020, 04:12:58 pm
Today I realised how small My apartment is. Facing I don’t know how many weeks on my own and i’m already registering how much my claustrophobia is kicking in.
Feeling like this must because bad dream.
Today’s smile is skin deep

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200323/202cbbdc4698821cc9e4a0aedea22d3b.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on March 23, 2020, 05:45:34 pm
Pammie you are not alone.  We are all here for each other....and there's lots to talk about!!!!

Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 23, 2020, 06:18:32 pm
Hugs hang in there this will blow over
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 24, 2020, 11:21:04 am
Pammie you are not alone.  We are all here for each other....and there's lots to talk about!!!!

Hugs,

Emma
Hugs for you too - thanks! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 24, 2020, 02:26:37 pm
Lockdown day 2 - a little stir crazy but went for a run, walk to the shops and to the doctor’s.
Still here
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200324/f478088a1972503ebab8fc7f85cceb80.jpg)

On the other hand I did make a delicious apple crumble today
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200324/882981490926a325902ce28ce39fc360.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 24, 2020, 05:20:02 pm
very nice , only 1 tin of custard???
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 24, 2020, 05:43:19 pm
very nice , only 1 tin of custard???
Oh no, more in the cupboard


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on March 24, 2020, 07:07:33 pm
Just wanted to give you a hug, Pammie.

I got the text today, lol. Stay at home! Or we'll get the cops on you!

Hang in there, sweetie. Through everything, okay? You're a very strong person. I see it in the way you are, the things you say... you can deal. BoJo will stop trying to be Winston Churchill eventually and things will get back to some semblance of normalcy. :)

Off topic... do you like rhubarb? That picture of the crumble made me remember rhubarb crumble I used to have as a kid. Took me back instantly 30 years, haha.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 25, 2020, 04:41:58 am
Just wanted to give you a hug, Pammie.

I got the text today, lol. Stay at home! Or we'll get the cops on you!

Hang in there, sweetie. Through everything, okay? You're a very strong person. I see it in the way you are, the things you say... you can deal. BoJo will stop trying to be Winston Churchill eventually and things will get back to some semblance of normalcy. :)

Off topic... do you like rhubarb? That picture of the crumble made me remember rhubarb crumble I used to have as a kid. Took me back instantly 30 years, haha.
Thank you so much Sephora! Rhubarb crumble takes me back to - my mam used to make that with home grown rhubarb - wonderful! Ah, those were the days! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Allie Jayne on March 25, 2020, 05:06:56 am
Actually my Mum made me Apple and Rhubarb Crumble, but I preferred Apple Crumble!

Allie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 25, 2020, 03:00:26 pm
Actually my Mum made me Apple and Rhubarb Crumble, but I preferred Apple Crumble!

Allie
Both are wonderful! 


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 25, 2020, 03:05:09 pm
Today I have NOT been going stir crazy. Today I have NOT counted the steps around my apartment using every available direction. Today I have NOT felt the walls of my apartment closing in.
In fact I have NOT done so many things that I’ve had no time to actually DO anything!
It’s so tiring NOT doing stuff!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200325/988ce33407291738fe064b959677a2e5.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 25, 2020, 04:18:27 pm
I have one of those days tomorrow waiting for a parcel to come. Looking good dear XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on March 25, 2020, 04:25:28 pm
Today I have NOT been going stir crazy. Today I have NOT counted the steps around my apartment using every available direction. Today I have NOT felt the walls of my apartment closing in.
In fact I have NOT done so many things that I’ve had no time to actually DO anything!
It’s so tiring NOT doing stuff!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200325/988ce33407291738fe064b959677a2e5.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

Pammie,

I like your floral skirt.   :)

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 25, 2020, 05:31:58 pm

Why thank you! It’s one of my favourites


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 25, 2020, 05:33:09 pm
I have one of those days tomorrow waiting for a parcel to come. Looking good dear XXXX
I have another 19+ days just like this one all lined up in front of me! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on March 25, 2020, 05:34:39 pm
wow rhubarb and apple crumble....excellent choice!!! When this is all over I will need a strict diet but until then...

and I am all in on Pammie's floral skirt.  Pammie you so make the look work.

I don't know what we all would do without TV and the internet! 
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 26, 2020, 09:17:30 am
wow rhubarb and apple crumble....excellent choice!!! When this is all over I will need a strict diet but until then...

and I am all in on Pammie's floral skirt.  Pammie you so make the look work.

I don't know what we all would do without TV and the internet!
Awwww thanks! Gone with the rock chick look today

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200326/d4720a0d6ff77407f2d64442c3c0c120.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on March 26, 2020, 09:27:34 am
Awwww thanks! Gone with the rock chick look today

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200326/d4720a0d6ff77407f2d64442c3c0c120.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in


Pammie,

You rock girl!

Have a wonderful day! 

 :)

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 26, 2020, 09:28:39 am

Pammie,

You rock girl!

Have a wonderful day! 

 :)

Chrissy
Thanks Chrissy - you too Hun! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 27, 2020, 12:52:26 pm
It’s going to be a strange weekend I think!
I checked this morning and my appt is only 24 paces wide - it was 25 on Sunday! By my calculations it will be a telephone box by the time lockdown finishes!

Today’s look
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200327/d57cf4a0cd1cbf2dd8a006aaa9dc400d.plist)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 28, 2020, 12:23:09 pm
Today has been an incredibly tough day. I’m very lonely and claustrophobic and that’s making me get very insular and inwardly focussed. Spent hours looking at my photo album of my little girl and crying.
I’ve been so strong on my trans journey but I think the current maelstrom is just too much. Wish my Andy was here - I just miss the physical contact.
I do feel i’m letting the side down a bit but I’ve consumed so much of my available energy and I’ve not got much left in the tank.
Tried to cheer myself up by wearing some bright clothes.


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on March 28, 2020, 12:43:00 pm
Pammie sorry you are feeling bad today.  Not sure if there's any other way.
The fact that you put on bright colors to fight it shows what a fighter you are.
Hugs until you get real ones
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 28, 2020, 12:44:26 pm
Pammie sorry you are feeling bad today.  Not sure if there's any other way.
The fact that you put on bright colors to fight it shows what a fighter you are.
Hugs until you get real ones
Thanks - can’t seem to add photos currently, getting an error message


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on March 28, 2020, 12:59:58 pm
Smile!  :)

Think of happy things.


Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 28, 2020, 01:01:26 pm
Smile!  :)

Think of happy things.


Chrissy
Thanks Chrissy xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on March 28, 2020, 01:54:07 pm
Hugs Try to look to the future when this mess is all over.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on March 28, 2020, 02:19:37 pm
Hugs from me as well , chin up its a waiting game . Not seen mum for 2 weeks .
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 28, 2020, 03:00:30 pm
Hugs Try to look to the future when this mess is all over.
Thanks Hun xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 28, 2020, 03:00:50 pm
Hugs from me as well , chin up its a waiting game . Not seen mum for 2 weeks .
Thanks! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 28, 2020, 03:01:50 pm
Today’s pic

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200328/ccd6f54d74aede3d2767a3d757c44b74.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 29, 2020, 11:10:58 am
Going for more positive today - contact with my Andy helped. Baking a cake and making Sunday dinner for myself!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200329/d7ddf21597c7570bace400a4b9f43671.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 30, 2020, 12:51:18 pm
Going for more positive today - contact with my Andy helped. Baking a cake and making Sunday dinner for myself!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200329/d7ddf21597c7570bace400a4b9f43671.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
One week in and i’m still mainly sane - I think! I still cannot contemplate months like this! 

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200330/012ba0a4967d7b0cbae6ad260e90772d.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on March 31, 2020, 04:36:30 pm
Day 8 of the lockdown and the wine/gin/cake/chocolate side of the equation is overpowering the daily run side. By my calculations 2 more weeks and my clothes won’t fit!

Hope everyone is surviving!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200331/3773e2a9b46a2cef88f0be5d1b7cd851.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on April 01, 2020, 11:51:40 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I hear you regarding not getting out and being able to get your exercise and being stuck at home with the nearby refrigerator so handy... and with time on your hands... it is so very easy to snack and eat all day.

My "essential" business is open, but business is very very slow...   I live just a couple miles from my office so when the weather cooperates I have been walking to and from work every day.  Also my next door coffee shop is closed so I am not able to go in there every morning, noon and night as I sometimes do.   I have been packing my own lunch, usually a sandwich and/or soup.

As I mentioned in my past comments on your Blog thread, I have been really enjoying your frequent daily pictures... but your picture today and a few other posted previously portrays sadness...  which is understandable.   Please know that by all measures "we" are doing better than the vast majoity of people elsewhere... you have a place to live, food to eat, and hopefully continued employment....  plus you have your loving family.

Thank you for sharing and posting,
HUGS,
Danielle

Day 8 of the lockdown and the wine/gin/cake/chocolate side of the equation is overpowering the daily run side. By my calculations 2 more weeks and my clothes won’t fit!

Hope everyone is surviving!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200331/3773e2a9b46a2cef88f0be5d1b7cd851.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 01, 2020, 11:56:22 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I hear you regarding not getting out and being able to get your exercise and being stuck at home with the nearby refrigerator so handy... and with time on your hands... it is so very easy to snack and eat all day.

My "essential" business is open, but business is very very slow...   I live just a couple miles from my office so when the weather cooperates I have been walking to and from work every day.  Also my next door coffee shop is closed so I am not able to go in there every morning, noon and night as I sometimes do.   I have been packing my own lunch, usually a sandwich and/or soup.

As I mentioned in my past comments on your Blog thread, I have been really enjoying your frequent daily pictures... but your picture today and a few other posted previously portrays sadness...  which is understandable.   Please know that by all measures "we" are doing better than the vast majoity of people elsewhere... you have a place to live, food to eat, and hopefully continued employment....  plus you have your loving family.

Thank you for sharing and posting,
HUGS,
Danielle


Danielle is kind and wise.

I also feel lucky. I have a pension. Remember those? Nowadays, they exist mostly in the fossil layers. I also have a green world that wraps around my home, soon to burst with color. So, I'm one of those damn lucky ones.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 01, 2020, 02:37:08 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I hear you regarding not getting out and being able to get your exercise and being stuck at home with the nearby refrigerator so handy... and with time on your hands... it is so very easy to snack and eat all day.

My "essential" business is open, but business is very very slow...   I live just a couple miles from my office so when the weather cooperates I have been walking to and from work every day.  Also my next door coffee shop is closed so I am not able to go in there every morning, noon and night as I sometimes do.   I have been packing my own lunch, usually a sandwich and/or soup.

As I mentioned in my past comments on your Blog thread, I have been really enjoying your frequent daily pictures... but your picture today and a few other posted previously portrays sadness...  which is understandable.   Please know that by all measures "we" are doing better than the vast majoity of people elsewhere... you have a place to live, food to eat, and hopefully continued employment....  plus you have your loving family.

Thank you for sharing and posting,
HUGS,
Danielle

You are so right Danielle!
I tried to be more positive today!  Xxx

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200401/0e1b35b96226002f38016f5f0f388f49.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 01, 2020, 03:11:58 pm
Pammie, it's okay to be sad some days. I think Westerners can make the mistake of thinking our lives have to be VISA commercials or Instagram accounts. If a person isn't sad here and there, they're not paying attention as there's a lot of suffering in the world and I don't want to be indifferent to it.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on April 01, 2020, 03:33:51 pm
@Pammie   cc;  @Oldandcreaky @davina61 @Julie H @ChrissyRyan @Maddie
Dear Pammie:
I am not sure if I had mentioned this previously on your thread but during these sad and sometimes negative days you might find some solace in my following thread:
       Positive Mindset... put away negativity (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,238255.0.html)

Also I noticed in one of your recent comment replies a couple days ago that you were having some difficulty getting your pictures posted, and it does appear that you are quite successful lately but in the future if you have problems please see the following LINK with may be of help to you:
(and you are always welcome to message me to ask questions)
      Trouble posting pictures??? HERE ARE THE INSTRUCTIONS (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,239999.0.html)

HUGS and best wishes as always   
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 01, 2020, 03:40:28 pm
@Pammie   cc;  @Oldandcreaky @davina61 @Julie H @ChrissyRyan @Maddie
Dear Pammie:
I am not sure if I had mentioned this previously on your thread but during these sad and sometimes negative days you might find some solace in my following thread:
       Positive Mindset... put away negativity (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,238255.0.html)

Also I noticed in one of your recent comment replies a couple days ago that you were having some difficulty getting your pictures posted, and it does appear that you are quite successful lately but in the future if you have problems please see the following LINK with may be of help to you:
(and you are always welcome to message me to ask questions)
      Trouble posting pictures??? HERE ARE THE INSTRUCTIONS (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,239999.0.html)

HUGS and best wishes as always   
Danielle

Thanks Danielle and i do read the positive mindset thread - I just keep forgetting
It was weird re photos - I always use the mobile app and it has an icon to add a photo but it couldn’t load them. I had words with my mobile, booted it, rebooted it then it gave in. After I showed it the view from my balcony on the 8th floor - subtle approach worked


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 01, 2020, 03:42:10 pm
Pammie, it's okay to be sad some days. I think Westerners can make the mistake of thinking our lives have to be VISA commercials or Instagram accounts. If a person isn't sad here and there, they're not paying attention as there's a lot of suffering in the world and I don't want to be indifferent to it.
Yes, that’s an excellent point. I think I do need to try to keep perspective though. I also am very lucky and have zero to complain about


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 01, 2020, 03:55:20 pm
Pammie, the last time I lived in a city, I rode the subway home just before midnight. At that time of the night, the subway is filled with people working four jobs to just keep one nostril above the water, as I was. So, each day makes a husk out of you and no VISA commercial can fill you in its thirty seconds. I had to keep my head down because I can read nonverbal cues, so it was brutal to recognize my fellow husks. At such moments, sadness is a kindness, for people do like to be seen and known, as trans-people know perhaps more than any other group. 
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 02, 2020, 03:16:56 am
Pammie, the last time I lived in a city, I rode the subway home just before midnight. At that time of the night, the subway is filled with people working four jobs to just keep one nostril above the water, as I was. So, each day makes a husk out of you and no VISA commercial can fill you in its thirty seconds. I had to keep my head down because I can read nonverbal cues, so it was brutal to recognize my fellow husks. At such moments, sadness is a kindness, for people do like to be seen and known, as trans-people know perhaps more than any other group.
Yes, that does make sense! I think I need to differentiate between sadness (due to my daughters death, the current situation and all these deaths) and self pity because i’m isolated and claustrophobic) - the latter just being unnecessary self-indulgence


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 02, 2020, 03:38:49 am
When all this <not allowed> is all over we are going to PARTY so hard to make up for it all , hang on in there dear. I am still in my nighty but getting ready to go to my lockup to work on van so have my escape
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 02, 2020, 05:25:26 am
When all this <not allowed> is all over we are going to PARTY so hard to make up for it all , hang on in there dear. I am still in my nighty but getting ready to go to my lockup to work on van so have my escape
Good for you and oh God yes re party!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on April 02, 2020, 08:10:31 am
Hugs we are all allowed to be self indulgent from time to time.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 02, 2020, 09:33:10 am
Hugs we are all allowed to be self indulgent from time to time.
U r such a sweetie! Thank you! Love my virtual hugs! Here’s some for you


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 02, 2020, 03:15:16 pm
It’s hard to know what day it is when one is isolated like this. Saturday or Sunday can easily pass for Monday and every weekday is alike.
Too many conference calls again today but same for everyone wfh I think!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200402/9dd781fddd4dbdd4c04aa3f02dcd0936.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on April 02, 2020, 03:35:37 pm
Have a nice evening Pammie!

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 02, 2020, 04:21:30 pm
Have a nice evening Pammie!

Chrissy
Thanks Chrissy! You too hun! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 03, 2020, 04:58:40 pm
Casual Friday look today. Had a long chat with my boyfriend today but I do miss him so much. In fact I had quite a few chats today As I designated this afternoon as catch-up Friday!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200403/f62b92df1e8937122ab60e80fd89b679.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on April 03, 2020, 06:29:20 pm
Casual Friday. 
You are funny Pammie!
Like the denim skirt. 
All your stuff works good.


Meow
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 04, 2020, 05:07:16 am
Casual Friday. 
You are funny Pammie!
Like the denim skirt. 
All your stuff works good.


Meow
Thanks hunny! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 04, 2020, 03:36:37 pm
I THINK it’s Saturday but I might be wrong! I successfully spent only 30 mins behind my laptop (then 40 mins in front of it after I realised that it’s hard to use it when u can’t see the screen!) but otherwise it might be any day!
12k run this morning then compensated by eating way too much and drinking gin and wine (separately)
Here’s me going out to the shops - tunes at the ready

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200404/72668c02210ce609378c48a492e6a576.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JudiBlueEyes on April 05, 2020, 10:31:36 am
Looking good Pammie!  I recently read through this thread to catch up and subscribe.  Oh, the wonder of what day it is!  I was awoken by the sound of the Postal truck driving by this morning.  I got up and started the day only to realize it was Sunday!  Must have been a special delivery parcel they were carrying.  Oh well, already had the coffee on.   Keep well!
Judi
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 05, 2020, 10:33:32 am
Looking good Pammie!  I recently read through this thread to catch up and subscribe.  Oh, the wonder of what day it is!  I was awoken by the sound of the Postal truck driving by this morning.  I got up and started the day only to realize it was Sunday!  Must have been a special delivery parcel they were carrying.  Oh well, already had the coffee on.   Keep well!
Judi
Thanks Judi, coffee is a good thing anyway!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 05, 2020, 05:00:29 pm
I think it was Sunday today but don’t quote me on that!
Another lockdown day survived. Hope everyone coping ok. Xx

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200405/c8b5a43319ab5a12263a94e04f4d0e4d.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 06, 2020, 02:14:16 pm
I think it might be Monday
Strange days indeed ! X

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200406/80fdfe18b7ea4599df76b29857c8a577.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 06, 2020, 02:18:59 pm
Liking your outfits, keeping it fresh . Have you got Friday off ? (bit of sarcasm !!!)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 06, 2020, 02:21:05 pm
Liking your outfits, keeping it fresh . Have you got Friday off ? (bit of sarcasm !!!)
Hee hee. I have indeed! If I notice when it is Friday!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 07, 2020, 12:27:04 pm
I think it was Sunday today but don’t quote me on that!
Another lockdown day survived. Hope everyone coping ok. Xx

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200405/c8b5a43319ab5a12263a94e04f4d0e4d.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

Pammie, you finally donned something I own, as I live in tank tops year-round. In the winter, I wear a sweatshirt over them, but in the summer, it's just the tank, unless I'm going to a restaurant, when I'll wear a button shirt over it. On the bottom, it's sweatpants in the winter and shorts in the summer. Easy-peasy fresh and breezy!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 07, 2020, 02:02:52 pm
Pammie, you finally donned something I own, as I live in tank tops year-round. In the winter, I wear a sweatshirt over them, but in the summer, it's just the tank, unless I'm going to a restaurant, when I'll wear a button shirt over it. On the bottom, it's sweatpants in the winter and shorts in the summer. Easy-peasy fresh and breezy!
Had to happen eventually!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 07, 2020, 02:17:18 pm
I do like that floral dress with the cardigan in your avatar. I'd wear that duo if I had somewhere to wear it, but I'd look a little overdressed wearing that on a walk in the woods or gardening.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 07, 2020, 02:28:58 pm
I do like that floral dress with the cardigan in your avatar. I'd wear that duo if I had somewhere to wear it, but I'd look a little overdressed wearing that on a walk in the woods or gardening.
Awwwww thank you - do you have any days out where you could dress up?
My today’s outfit.....
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200407/58d9eba0c5e04b94115dff8a0fb29e8c.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 08, 2020, 02:49:05 pm
Feeling so isolated today. Went for a walk and only saw one other person in their own.
Today’s outfit complete with fake smile.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200408/5ad4573ccd0a891999cd6e86136446cf.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on April 08, 2020, 03:01:52 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I love your warm weather top...  what is the temperature there???

It is a little cool here for wearing something that light...
  17deg(f)  and snowing and will be snowing all day.

HUGS,
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 08, 2020, 04:38:13 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I love your warm weather top...  what is the temperature there???

It is a little cool here for wearing something that light...
  17deg(f)  and snowing and will be snowing all day.

HUGS,
Danielle

It was 18c today (64f) in Manchester that counts as summer!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 08, 2020, 04:39:32 pm
Awwwww thank you - do you have any days out where you could dress up?
My today’s outfit.....
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200407/58d9eba0c5e04b94115dff8a0fb29e8c.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

That's a cute one. You really have range.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 08, 2020, 04:40:43 pm
It was 18c today (64f) in Manchester that counts as summer!


I opened the door and the light shone in

I'm jealous. I've yet to feel 55 degrees F.

Say, Pammie, as far as feeling isolated, do you have a pet? That make great pals and whereas dogs are my fave, cats are low care.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 09, 2020, 02:27:43 am
I'm jealous. I've yet to feel 55 degrees F.

Say, Pammie, as far as feeling isolated, do you have a pet? That make great pals and whereas dogs are my fave, cats are low care.
Hi,
We are not allowed pets in our apartments - part of the lease agreement. Good idea though!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 09, 2020, 02:50:14 am
Morning Pam, it was hot working in my unit yesterday and car showed 19C ! Its great window open sat here in dressing gown eating my porridge . Will be a sweaty one today sorting the shelving out , sorting boxes of "useful" <not allowed> that might come in handy plus all my VW spares and bits for the hot rod build .  Stay safe dear as it looks like lock down will be extended . XXXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 09, 2020, 03:07:38 am
Morning Pam, it was hot working in my unit yesterday and car showed 19C ! Its great window open sat here in dressing gown eating my porridge . Will be a sweaty one today sorting the shelving out , sorting boxes of "useful" <not allowed> that might come in handy plus all my VW spares and bits for the hot rod build .  Stay safe dear as it looks like lock down will be extended . XXXXXX
Thanks Hun! You too! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on April 09, 2020, 05:04:53 am
Awwwww thank you - do you have any days out where you could dress up?
My today’s outfit.....
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200407/58d9eba0c5e04b94115dff8a0fb29e8c.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

Nice top Pammie, I have a similar style in white...then I went back for black as well, couldn't resist!  Do you have any others like this? :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 09, 2020, 03:39:39 pm
Nice top Pammie, I have a similar style in white...then I went back for black as well, couldn't resist!  Do you have any others like this? :)
Not exactly like that one but I know what you mean, if you find a nice top that sits really well then yeh, buying it in different colours is a great idea when it’s available.
This is my outfit today.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200409/37e78b3cfe6a1720aef7225950d7dc20.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 10, 2020, 04:36:33 pm
Lovely day in Manchester today! And Pammie is feeling better!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200410/7902dad35759cc3d727197c74ecaed0d.jpg)

And then the casual workout look for my kettlebell exercises


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 10, 2020, 04:38:14 pm
Lovely day in Manchester today! And Pammie is feeling better!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200410/7902dad35759cc3d727197c74ecaed0d.jpg)

And then the casual workout look for my kettlebell exercises


I opened the door and the light shone in
Oops....  forgot the photo
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200410/c17a493d00f5d6c7b1ca5c63d9473a3a.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 11, 2020, 03:00:57 am
strap dress is nice , exercise look is good as well. I need to do something , saying that as soon as I have sorted out my unit will be back on rubbing down filler and paint ------------
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 11, 2020, 04:04:11 am
strap dress is nice , exercise look is good as well. I need to do something , saying that as soon as I have sorted out my unit will be back on rubbing down filler and paint ------------
You do seem to work very hard! I’m beginning to feel like a right slacker!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CynthiaAnn on April 11, 2020, 07:36:58 am
Lovely day in Manchester today! And Pammie is feeling better!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200410/7902dad35759cc3d727197c74ecaed0d.jpg)


Lovely floral print, it's sooo spring  :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 11, 2020, 07:39:38 am
You do seem to work very hard! I’m beginning to feel like a right slacker!


I opened the door and the light shone in

Pammie, you're a busy bee compared to me. I change my tank top every other day and my sweatshirt and sweatpants every four days.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 11, 2020, 09:40:42 am
Pammie, you're a busy bee compared to me. I change my tank top every other day and my sweatshirt and sweatpants every four days.
O+C that’s gross, you bad girl! That’s learned behaviour from a previous existence and needs to be stopped! Get a grip and some extra sweats!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 11, 2020, 09:42:56 am
Lovely floral print, it's sooo spring  :)
Thank you!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 11, 2020, 02:17:17 pm
Another lovely day in Salford and I got some time with my boyfriend too (naughty but nice) - another few hours on duty as an NHS volunteer but still no calls yet.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200411/9ef1d6b8e0ba32bf1af02e8cf4895e3c.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 12, 2020, 06:41:42 am
O+C that’s gross, you bad girl! That’s learned behaviour from a previous existence and needs to be stopped! Get a grip and some extra sweats!


I opened the door and the light shone in

Pammie, a wise lady once wrote, "The most important thing I have learned on here is the truly diverse nature of transgender - there is such a wide spectrum of what trans is and I feel enriched by the knowledge."

Anyway, I'm a gardener. I don't fluff myself. I fluff my woods and gardens. I'm also a Mainer. We're a rough and ready lot of women. Lastly, we're at different points on our journeys. I've had decades to wear what pleased me. That used to be pretty things. Now I choose comfy, sturdy clothing. So, sure, my clothes are stained, but my gardens are impeccable!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 12, 2020, 09:11:14 pm
Easter Sunday was a good day and i’m back in control. So much awful news but it feels like we are turning the corner in the UK
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200413/acf0941cead9cd2f26e3c0f53ca9545d.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 12, 2020, 09:13:46 pm
Pammie, a wise lady once wrote, "The most important thing I have learned on here is the truly diverse nature of transgender - there is such a wide spectrum of what trans is and I feel enriched by the knowledge."

Anyway, I'm a gardener. I don't fluff myself. I fluff my woods and gardens. I'm also a Mainer. We're a rough and ready lot of women. Lastly, we're at different points on our journeys. I've had decades to wear what pleased me. That used to be pretty things. Now I choose comfy, sturdy clothing. So, sure, my clothes are stained, but my gardens are impeccable!
Good point O+C! I kinda list that perspective for a while but you reminded me - thank you! You really have earned the damn right my to dress how the heck you want !


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on April 13, 2020, 07:17:47 am
Pammie, that was deeply gracious.  :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 13, 2020, 08:26:32 am
Yes I spend most of my days in work trousers and polo shirt/sweat top not to mention steel toecap boots , gave myself the day off so slumming around flat in pink T and stretchy skirt------------------
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 13, 2020, 09:58:16 am
Yes I spend most of my days in work trousers and polo shirt/sweat top not to mention steel toecap boots , gave myself the day off so slumming around flat in pink T and stretchy skirt------------------
Good for you hun!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 13, 2020, 02:21:48 pm
A whole lot cooler here today so back to the jumper drawer!
Such a strange extra long weekend but i’m doing ok.

 (https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200413/1c169f6c84d7b0fb9f7d6e2b1a4619ba.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 14, 2020, 03:06:00 pm
6am start for my run and first tele conference at 8am - yep, long weekend definitely over! Not a bad day though and I guess i’m getting used to this way of working!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200414/42e78a58a7b51f8ae1a450d049ea5aae.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 15, 2020, 03:17:35 pm
Forgot to take a pic today - had a busy day!
Have to make do with my workout look!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200415/0639cf7ddcbfcbc42a582617975716b9.jpg)

Feels like we are making progress in the UK too now. Fingers crossed that deaths start falling soon xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 15, 2020, 03:31:18 pm
looking great dear, XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 15, 2020, 04:47:07 pm
looking great dear, XXXX
Thanks Hun! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 16, 2020, 02:30:22 pm
Lovely day in Manchester today - ooh and another 3 weeks of lockdown - yay!!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200416/6eb9b1a5582bddac8af1d4237451b1a5.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on April 16, 2020, 04:26:04 pm
Lovely day in Manchester today - ooh and another 3 weeks of lockdown - yay!!

Every day since the lockdown started has been fantastic here in Cardiff. And what's Wales known for most of all?... (well, besides the singers!)

Rain.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 16, 2020, 04:47:49 pm
Every day since the lockdown started has been fantastic here in Cardiff. And what's Wales known for most of all?... (well, besides the singers!)

Rain.
Yes it’s strange isn’t it - Manchester of course has the same reputation re rain xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 17, 2020, 02:36:35 pm
Sitting in isolation this afternoon I remembered just how damn lucky I am!
I get to be me for the rest of my life, I have an amazing boyfriend who hopefully will one day be my husband, 4 amazing children (one has sadly passed away but left a huge impression of love and fun behind), 8 amazing grandkids, lovely brothers and sister and oodles of great friends -  plus all you lot on here!!
I’m such a lucky girl! Xxx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200417/4994b21736c7b55c20086896c46a5a0f.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 17, 2020, 04:21:14 pm
And we are lucky to know you Hugs and XXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 17, 2020, 04:24:51 pm
And we are lucky to know you Hugs and XXXXX
Awwwww right back at you! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 18, 2020, 02:25:52 pm
I think I’ve got a handle on this lockdown finally. Between morning run and illicit meetings with my fella and an evening walk i’m stretching the rules but practising social distancing

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200418/a51666bc51844eff19bd459eb4ac89ce.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on April 18, 2020, 03:01:42 pm
Hugs I'm glad to hear you are starting to find a comfort zone even if it isn't ideal
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 18, 2020, 03:02:38 pm
Hugs I'm glad to hear you are starting to find a comfort zone even if it isn't ideal
Thanks Hun! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on April 18, 2020, 03:02:56 pm
I think I’ve got a handle on this lockdown finally. Between morning run and illicit meetings with my fella and an evening walk i’m stretching the rules but practising social distancing

You're lucky you're in Manchester! Here in Wales it is actually *illegal* for us to leave the house for exercise more than once a day. In the other UK countries it is not illegal. (At least, as far as I know.)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 18, 2020, 03:04:54 pm
You're lucky you're in Manchester! Here in Wales it is actually *illegal* for us to leave the house for exercise more than once a day. In the other UK countries it is not illegal. (At least, as far as I know.)
Ur right but I figure they wouldn’t actually challenge me anyway as long as i’m socially distancing xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 19, 2020, 02:27:02 pm
I wanted to make a bit of an effort to meet up for a sneaky walk with my boyfriend - feeling ultra feminine today

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200419/fc6e8362aea292fed61e8c5a9f139733.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: MikaelaA on April 19, 2020, 04:10:07 pm
Pammie,  You're looking great as always.  I hope you enjoy your walk.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 19, 2020, 04:15:06 pm
Pammie,  You're looking great as always.  I hope you enjoy your walk.
Awwww thanks! I thoroughly enjoyed my walk! Sun, blue skies and even the cold wind couldn’t stop it being lovely


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on April 20, 2020, 06:45:26 am


(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200419/fc6e8362aea292fed61e8c5a9f139733.jpg)
Stop it already Pammie...
Kidding!!...you look fantastic.
Your boyfriend is a lucky guy, and it sounds like he knows it :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 20, 2020, 11:59:57 am
Stop it already Pammie...
Kidding!!...you look fantastic.
Your boyfriend is a lucky guy, and it sounds like he knows it :)
He does, I remind him often!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 20, 2020, 03:08:46 pm
Monday’s are a little less daunting these days! Not that different from any other day - I work quite flexibly so did some work over the last weekend anyway,
It’s a strange world when one can go whole days without actually talking to anyone face to face.
I am fed-up of hearing the same message repeated ad infinitum.

Oh well, another day survived!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 20, 2020, 03:50:35 pm
Makes me feel lucky to escape to my garage but its still groundhog day when I get home-------- did start playing guess the ad on next but even though it feels like the same half dozen repeated still not got one yet!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on April 20, 2020, 04:29:47 pm
Monday’s are a little less daunting these days! Not that different from any other day - I work quite flexibly so did some work over the last weekend anyway,
It’s a strange world when one can go whole days without actually talking to anyone face to face.
I am fed-up of hearing the same message repeated ad infinitum.

Oh well, another day survived!


I opened the door and the light shone in

This whole thing is utterly messed up. But take it from someone who's had the virus and somehow survived it... Pammie you don't want this. Is why I haven't been here.

It will get better but... god, this thing is bad. I only had a mild version, heavens know why. But... the fewer people get it, the better. Trust me.

*hugs*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sarah-Red on April 20, 2020, 04:59:44 pm
This whole thing is utterly messed up. But take it from someone who's had the virus and somehow survived it... Pammie you don't want this. Is why I haven't been here.

It will get better but... god, this thing is bad. I only had a mild version, heavens know why. But... the fewer people get it, the better. Trust me.

*hugs*

huhh?? you had the virus?! :O That's crazy! I'm sure effing glad you made it through. jeez!
*hug*

Also.. Hi Pammie XD Hope things go well for you.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 20, 2020, 05:21:28 pm
This whole thing is utterly messed up. But take it from someone who's had the virus and somehow survived it... Pammie you don't want this. Is why I haven't been here.

It will get better but... god, this thing is bad. I only had a mild version, heavens know why. But... the fewer people get it, the better. Trust me.

*hugs*
I’m not suggesting for a second I want it but believe me, if one is living alone in a small apartment and is claustrophobic there really is a limit to how often the message can be rammed down ones throat.
I choose to go out for a run early every morning and a long walk every evening and I practice social distancing all the time - that’s me finding my survival balance.


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on April 20, 2020, 05:55:00 pm
I’m not suggesting for a second I want it but believe me, if one is living alone in a small apartment and is claustrophobic there really is a limit to how often the message can be rammed down ones throat.
I choose to go out for a run early every morning and a long walk every evening and I practice social distancing all the time - that’s me finding my survival balance.


I opened the door and the light shone in

I know sweetie and it freaks me out sometimes. Where I am in the UK, it's been like the perfect spring day today. Not a cloud in the sky, a lovely breeze, birds singing... a time where people would have been out enjoying it. It's like the world is being a PITA. Any other time we'd have snow, or hurricanes, or torrential rain with a chance of drizzle.

2020 will likely go down in history as "The Year The World Tried To Kill Us!" lol. Hang in there okay? I know how you're feeling. It can drive you to distraction. Just... be careful, and stay safe. And if anyone looks a bit peaky, cross the road. :)

huhh?? you had the virus?! :O That's crazy! I'm sure effing glad you made it through. jeez!
*hug*

Also.. Hi Pammie XD Hope things go well for you.

Mhm. At first I thought it was just hayfever. I'm okay, although I was scared I'd permanently lost my sense of smell. Took almost three weeks to get it back. I feel for people who've had it way worse though. :(
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on April 20, 2020, 06:21:23 pm
That's awful Sephirah.
Glad you are able to get better
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: MikaelaA on April 21, 2020, 11:50:58 am
Mhm. At first I thought it was just hayfever. I'm okay, although I was scared I'd permanently lost my sense of smell. Took almost three weeks to get it back. I feel for people who've had it way worse though. :(

This is definitely something you don't want to mess with. I originally thought I had bronchitis until my wife ended up in the hospital.  She's now home after 1 week but she will be on oxygen for the foreseeable future and this is with no preexisting conditions. I got it a little less severe but no fun nonetheless.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 21, 2020, 02:49:55 pm
This is definitely something you don't want to mess with. I originally thought I had bronchitis until my wife ended up in the hospital.  She's now home after 1 week but she will be on oxygen for the foreseeable future and this is with no preexisting conditions. I got it a little less severe but no fun nonetheless.
I’m definitely not suggesting anyone would want to get it but what I am saying is that it’s possible to go out more than once and practice social distancing and have no extra risk.
Anyway, i’m doing what I need to to survive!
I think it might be Tuesday today


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on April 21, 2020, 05:43:36 pm
I am glad to read that everyone is surviving this virus.  Sephirah it is such excellent news that you are feeling better and Michelle I hope that your wife has a speedy

Separately Pammie I love your on-going fashion show.  Please keep it going!!!


Six Foot Distance Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 22, 2020, 08:22:52 am
I am glad to read that everyone is surviving this virus.  Sephirah it is such excellent news that you are feeling better and Michelle I hope that your wife has a speedy

Separately Pammie I love your on-going fashion show.  Please keep it going!!!


Six Foot Distance Hugs,

Emma
Thanks!
Yesterday’s outfit !
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200422/7be982b589ffce52f651eed55eac61fb.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: MikaelaA on April 22, 2020, 09:14:59 am
I’m definitely not suggesting anyone would want to get it but what I am saying is that it’s possible to go out more than once and practice social distancing and have no extra risk.
Anyway, i’m doing what I need to to survive!
I think it might be Tuesday today


I opened the door and the light shone in

Hi Pammie,  I'm very happy that you're able to get out.  It's very difficult being cooped up in the house.  There's no doubt you are trying to be safe.  I'm fortunate to be back working so it's not as hard to keep track of the days.  I hope you continue to stay healthy.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 22, 2020, 09:20:20 am
Hi Pammie,  I'm very happy that you're able to get out.  It's very difficult being cooped up in the house.  There's no doubt you are trying to be safe.  I'm fortunate to be back working so it's not as hard to keep track of the days.  I hope you continue to stay healthy.
Thanks! I’m working too but exclusively from home. Hope you are ok too. Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on April 22, 2020, 10:56:21 am
I hope you are having a wonderful day Pammie!

     :)

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 22, 2020, 11:01:36 am
I hope you are having a wonderful day Pammie!

     :)

Chrissy
Thanks Chrissy! I had a tearful hour this morning thinking about my beautiful little girl I lost last year, one just never knows when that is going to happen but it only lasted an hour which is progress.
Now i’m fine thanks - just a very busy day work wise.
Hope ur good too. Xxx

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200422/787f7a8a146523455a6a9c8478a6dd86.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 22, 2020, 01:18:19 pm
You do have good taste in clothes dear.XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 22, 2020, 03:18:40 pm
You do have good taste in clothes dear.XXXX
Awwwwww thanks Hun! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on April 22, 2020, 03:42:24 pm
The trouble is, Pammie, I agree with davina61... and I have enough clothes (more female than male now I'm sure), and you're making me want yet more!

Must be that female thing...

I'm not going shopping right now, though. No, no, no... Only for essentials.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 22, 2020, 03:54:10 pm
The trouble is, Pammie, I agree with davina61... and I have enough clothes (more female than male now I'm sure), and you're making me want yet more!

Must be that female thing...

I'm not going shopping right now, though. No, no, no... Only for essentials.
Hee hee. Sorry but I suspect that there is no such concept as “enough clothes”


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on April 22, 2020, 10:11:57 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I love your beautiful spring/summer dress... you wear it well.   
I am a little envious however, it is not quite warm enough here for me to change over from my winter clothes yet.  I can hardly wait for the opportunity to wear all of my outfits that have been stuck in my closet all winter.

Thank you for sharing your lovely photo.

HUGS,
Danielle

Thanks Chrissy! I had a tearful hour this morning thinking about my beautiful little girl I lost last year, one just never knows when that is going to happen but it only lasted an hour which is progress.
Now i’m fine thanks - just a very busy day work wise.
Hope ur good too. Xxx

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200422/787f7a8a146523455a6a9c8478a6dd86.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 23, 2020, 03:53:18 am
(https://i.imgur.com/Ux7Eimh.jpg)had to buy this ,its getting full!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 23, 2020, 06:54:03 am
(https://i.imgur.com/Ux7Eimh.jpg)had to buy this ,its getting full!!!
Yay! Great purchase!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 23, 2020, 02:21:05 pm
Had a great 50 minute zoom session with my voice therapist today and feeling excellent!
Positive feedback is such an enabler

Sunny again today, and St. George’s day so got my England shirt out!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200423/351b1781b09aa8305d6a8c3a8446625e.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on April 23, 2020, 03:21:09 pm
@Pammie
That was great  news to read about your successful and encouraging voice therapy session.
Yes indeed, positive feedback is wonderful to hear and a great motivator to continue on.

OK now, you are really making me jealous with your summer outfits that you are wearing.
Here where I live it was below freezing last night and early this morning 26 deg(f) and right now it is 38 deg(f) and raining.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and your photos.
HUGS,
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on April 23, 2020, 03:24:37 pm
Had a great 50 minute zoom session with my voice therapist today and feeling excellent!
Positive feedback is such an enabler

Sunny again today, and St. George’s day so got my England shirt out!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200423/351b1781b09aa8305d6a8c3a8446625e.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in


Yes, a good experience is good to experience!   :)

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 23, 2020, 04:18:06 pm
@Pammie
That was great  news to read about your successful and encouraging voice therapy session.
Yes indeed, positive feedback is wonderful to hear and a great motivator to continue on.

OK now, you are really making me jealous with your summer outfits that you are wearing.
Here where I live it was below freezing last night and early this morning 26 deg(f) and right now it is 38 deg(f) and raining.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and your photos.
HUGS,
Danielle

Sorry Danielle!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 23, 2020, 04:18:30 pm

Yes, a good experience is good to experience!   :)

Chrissy
Perfectly put!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 24, 2020, 05:17:10 pm
Friday was another lovely day in Manchester - it’s so ironic that lockdown came with such positive weather!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200424/3c195f3700a9e11f3e0bbcd118760ae9.jpg)

Any my nighttime attire
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200424/7b95b02dafa09f938a4bdfdacd18d4bb.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 25, 2020, 03:26:55 pm
My balcony time plus long walks means i’m getting some sun in lockdown world!
Still fed up of it though!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200425/87f69c68394d0fe2690e718a322a8f3a.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 26, 2020, 02:30:10 pm
I think it was Sunday! But don’t quote me on it!
Bit of a down day today but I did get an hour with my Andy which was wonderful. Last good day for a while so gave the legs a last airing!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200426/78e2bcc01563da919516bdbebc450ea1.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on April 27, 2020, 03:03:51 am
Have to keep reminding myself what day it is as well, its a bit groundhog as working on van nonstop 10 to 4
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on April 29, 2020, 06:23:58 pm
Lockdown is just another rollercoaster just like the whole transition process. I have good days, bad days, happy days and sad days. Today (well, yesterday) was a sad day - very insular and inwardly focussing today.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200429/5f73e20a801fe5bf0818cc91f1d432c0.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on April 29, 2020, 08:13:43 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: MikaelaA on April 30, 2020, 12:58:29 pm
Pammie,  Hopefully we can be the shining light in your day.   :)


Hugs,
Michelle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 01, 2020, 02:56:55 am
Pammie,  Hopefully we can be the shining light in your day.   :)


Hugs,
Michelle
Thank you! I’ve been in a bit of a slump this week but that’s just part of life’s rollercoaster I guess.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200501/c3e2b37f721d24ad9dc188a1c08c6da8.jpg)
This did cheer me up though!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on May 01, 2020, 05:18:36 am
Lockdown is just another rollercoaster just like the whole transition process. I have good days, bad days, happy days and sad days. Today (well, yesterday) was a sad day - very insular and inwardly focussing today.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200429/5f73e20a801fe5bf0818cc91f1d432c0.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

Sorry to read about your sad day Pammie but keep rocking that pink and visit here reg, it really helps!  Take care.

~Jenny~
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 01, 2020, 06:05:52 am
Sorry to read about your sad day Pammie but keep rocking that pink and visit here reg, it really helps!  Take care.

~Jenny~
Thanks Jenny! Hugs xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 01, 2020, 06:22:26 pm
Another tough lockdown day
Feeling isolated and sad today
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200501/a83ad6da367163330eb5f7ac185ef541.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200501/cab2c5f7b77aa1ca8cfb30e5ea979c67.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on May 01, 2020, 09:30:29 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 02, 2020, 09:57:27 am
Hugs
Thanks Julie! Always welcome. I managed to get in control for a couple of weeks but that feels like it’s slipping away again - isolation and claustrophobia taking over again. I need to get a grip!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 04, 2020, 03:21:13 pm
I’ve had a really tough few days, so fed up with lockdown and feeling so isolated.
Still trying to smile
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200504/ec9d240203770d805b35d7d4c51540e5.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on May 04, 2020, 03:28:56 pm
Hugs

Hang in there
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 04, 2020, 03:46:29 pm
Hugs

Hang in there
Thanks Julie xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 04, 2020, 03:59:05 pm
Hugs from me as well. Just think of the party you will have !!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 04, 2020, 05:05:17 pm
Hugs from me as well. Just think of the party you will have !!!
Good point hun! Xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 08, 2020, 04:13:38 pm
Tough few days. Really struggling with both isolation and claustrophobia and eating and drinking too much as a result!
Had a wonderful evening with my younger daughter yesterday though which was a massive step forward!
So from today cutting down on the chocolate, cutting out biscuits and especially on the gin!
Extra kettlebell workout tonight as part of my attempt to re-lose the extra weight
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200508/3c84e15e3fe6bbcfa47dad0445d211c2.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on May 08, 2020, 05:26:37 pm
Hugs hang in there
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 08, 2020, 06:16:44 pm
Hugs hang in there
Thanks Julie! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 09, 2020, 02:13:25 pm
Beautiful day today!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200509/020f6748643a0abe7558d988fb958b8f.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on May 09, 2020, 04:31:30 pm
Extra kettlebell workout tonight as part of my attempt to re-lose the extra weight
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200508/3c84e15e3fe6bbcfa47dad0445d211c2.jpg)

Well it certainly doesn't show! Not in that picture anyway! - E
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 11, 2020, 03:10:16 am
Well it certainly doesn't show! Not in that picture anyway! - E
Awwww thanks, carefully choreographed angle!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 13, 2020, 04:02:38 pm
Awwww thanks, carefully choreographed angle!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Really down this week - I don’t think anyone in government cares about people isolated and alone.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200513/ec420ac8105a8bb1d5f5b50c45060b90.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on May 13, 2020, 04:04:53 pm
Hugs try to hand in there Pammie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 13, 2020, 04:34:08 pm
Hugs try to hand in there Pammie
Thanks Julie. I bought I was on top of this but I think I got too optimistic about what would be announced last week and was really disappointed


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 14, 2020, 03:06:12 am
At least you can go out more now. HUG from me dear .
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on May 14, 2020, 11:39:19 am
Red hot dress Pammie!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 14, 2020, 01:19:45 pm
At least you can go out more now. HUG from me dear .
Thanks hun! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 14, 2020, 01:20:20 pm
Red hot dress Pammie!
Thanks, one of my favourites! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 14, 2020, 03:15:21 pm
Still hanging on in there!
Struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel but there are people dying so I can’t really complain at isolation
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200514/e0797a480778aabc65d8115fdc7b9f48.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 14, 2020, 05:13:37 pm
Just got 3 more weeks off (that will be 4 from yesterday) , I think myself lucky to have my workshop to go to as I know I would be climbing the walls here. Still miss my friends, stay sharp , start a hobby? but most of all stay safe XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 16, 2020, 09:25:11 am
Just got 3 more weeks off (that will be 4 from yesterday) , I think myself lucky to have my workshop to go to as I know I would be climbing the walls here. Still miss my friends, stay sharp , start a hobby? but most of all stay safe XXXX
Thanks Davina, i’m walking firm hours per day and work is just frantic so I don’t have much spare time
Yesterday’s outfit
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200516/73c89ede428fb1fc1aa8e1ecbeef5337.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on May 16, 2020, 10:41:29 am
Still hanging on in there!
Struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel but there are people dying so I can’t really complain at isolation
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200514/e0797a480778aabc65d8115fdc7b9f48.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in

That's a beautiful dress. The pandemic is pretty easy for me because I worked so hard to surround my house with life. I raised a shade this morning and right outside my window I saw two gray squirrels, one red squirrel, three ground squirrels, two goldfinches, one hummingbird, one rabbit, and many sleek crows.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 16, 2020, 12:37:43 pm
That's a beautiful dress. The pandemic is pretty easy for me because I worked so hard to surround my house with life. I raised a shade this morning and right outside my window I saw two gray squirrels, one red squirrel, three ground squirrels, two goldfinches, one hummingbird, one rabbit, and many sleek crows.
Yes, you really have life sorted! Good for you! 


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on May 16, 2020, 01:47:53 pm
Yes, you really have life sorted! Good for you! 


I opened the door and the light shone in

I don't know if I have life sorted or if I'm simply easily amused.  ;)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 16, 2020, 02:43:18 pm
I don't know if I have life sorted or if I'm simply easily amused.  ;)
Hee hee - maybe the two work well together


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 16, 2020, 10:35:54 pm
Lockdown rebellion yesterday and i’m not feeling at all guilty - saw both. My boyfriend and then separately my daughter! Counts as an excellent day! Xx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200517/62222455c24ab088c5d1778a3d36e9a9.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 18, 2020, 02:01:49 pm
Monday’s - gotta love Monday’s - no, seriously.’, it’s the latest edict! Everyone is supposed to enjoy Monday’s to support national morale 
Well, no ok, I made that bit up
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200518/519fa66cae26f67989c9fe1c0209dbc9.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 18, 2020, 02:34:38 pm
Is it Monday today?
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 18, 2020, 04:36:22 pm
Is it Monday today?
Lol - I THINK so


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 19, 2020, 06:53:50 pm
I’m confused again, I was going to say “and  today is Tuesday” but I’ve left it too late and now today has become tomorrow - and people said tomorrow never comes! How wrong were they!!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200519/671e8bf53c1735d821d1f12694371f02.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 20, 2020, 02:55:05 am
Well its Wed now!! food shop day for me again-------
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 20, 2020, 08:43:43 am
Well its Wed now!! food shop day for me again-------
Ok so it’s pretty definitely still Wednesday here in Manchester but is that today or tomorrow?


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 20, 2020, 09:05:08 am
Cant be tomorrow yet or I would be working on the bus instead of cooking!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on May 21, 2020, 02:46:15 am
Are you allowed to see your hairstylist yet Pammie?  Finally got to mine after all that wait, it will make you feel a little better hopefully.  Same with beautician, kinda scary with all the rules but worth it! :) 

~Jenny~
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 22, 2020, 06:30:33 am
Are you allowed to see your hairstylist yet Pammie?  Finally got to mine after all that wait, it will make you feel a little better hopefully.  Same with beautician, kinda scary with all the rules but worth it! :) 

~Jenny~
Not yet re hairstylist
Maybe not until July


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on May 22, 2020, 10:54:21 pm
Not yet re hairstylist
Maybe not until July


I opened the door and the light shone in

Hang in there gf, it's a drag right now I know.  I'm gonna have to stop the beauty salon visits for a while as it happens and concentrate on my hair for the time being.  It's growing out nicely, I'm really pleased.  Good luck with your next visit, let us know when you finally get back.

~Jenny~
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 23, 2020, 08:32:39 am
Hang in there gf, it's a drag right now I know.  I'm gonna have to stop the beauty salon visits for a while as it happens and concentrate on my hair for the time being.  It's growing out nicely, I'm really pleased.  Good luck with your next visit, let us know when you finally get back.

~Jenny~
Thanks Jenny! Great re ur hair - it makes such a difference doesn’t it! xx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 24, 2020, 05:31:12 pm
This morning I stood n front of one wardrobe after another (I only have 4 - we are not talking Jackie Onassis here!) trying to decide what to wear. Then it suddenly occurred to me just how flipping amazing my life is! What a wonderful life when my challenge of the day is which outfit I feel like wearing.
I look in the mirror and I see me, I see the real me and it makes me feel so happy.
I love the styles I have found, love my skin and the world I inhabit!
In other words I need to stop whining quite so much! 


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on May 25, 2020, 01:47:37 am
This morning I stood n front of one wardrobe after another (I only have 4 - we are not talking Jackie Onassis here!) trying to decide what to wear. Then it suddenly occurred to me just how flipping amazing my life is! What a wonderful life when my challenge of the day is which outfit I feel like wearing.
I look in the mirror and I see me, I see the real me and it makes me feel so happy.
I love the styles I have found, love my skin and the world I inhabit!

It's great to hear that you have regained your happiness, Pammie! - E
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 25, 2020, 03:08:26 am
Pammie's back!!! Good for you dear, we should all be thankful for  life no matter what . What shall I wear today ? oh yes work trousers and polo shirt, still flatting paint!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 25, 2020, 11:42:02 am
Pammie's back!!! Good for you dear, we should all be thankful for  life no matter what . What shall I wear today ? oh yes work trousers and polo shirt, still flatting paint!!



I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 25, 2020, 02:57:25 pm
Lots of fresh air and sun today
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200525/f56c8cf7fce5434fdcc94f945b5ccba2.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on May 25, 2020, 06:04:51 pm
Thanks Jenny! Great re ur hair - it makes such a difference doesn’t it! xx


I opened the door and the light shone in

It certainly does, my stylist is almost like a therapist she's so helpful.  And I'm glad you've turned around, keep positive! :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 26, 2020, 03:41:19 pm
Nice day again today - feeling much more relaxed since I started focussing n how far I’ve come instead of focussing on being isolated.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200526/af58da47efb72e74ca7d5a510f651906.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 26, 2020, 04:35:49 pm
Classy as ever .Glass of champers , private yacht or casino .
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 26, 2020, 05:49:07 pm
Classy as ever .Glass of champers , private yacht or casino .
Hee hee, I wish!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 28, 2020, 06:40:03 pm
Lovely day in Manchester today and feeling much more in control too
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200528/ea703fa0d6aeac883d343db2132bfcb3.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on May 30, 2020, 05:01:07 pm
I really went for it in the gorgeous weather today! Very brave but felt I owned the look!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200530/fda686aa010b42bef493084c36be9470.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on May 31, 2020, 02:29:51 am
You do dear, cant do that myself till I lose 40lb
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 03, 2020, 04:22:28 pm
You do dear, cant do that myself till I lose 40lb
Thank you - you’ll get there!


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 03, 2020, 04:27:57 pm
Lockdown has been such a rollercoaster for most of us I think, certainly it has for me. I’m back in the up slope again thank goodness. I do love my own company but need social distancing interaction too. Video conferencing is ok but it’s not the same as really meeting people in the flesh.
Still, I’ve made the effort every work day to dress for work and the warm weather has allowed me to get my sundresses out at other times which always makes me feel better!
I’m lucky in that I can just be myself so I need to remember how far I’ve come and how lucky I am!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200603/7a2edc76750466de027c7262673cb996.jpg)


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 06, 2020, 06:46:30 pm
Just one week until my daughters birthday  - would have been her 35th.
All things pale to me in comparison - I thought until Siobhan died that transition was my biggest challenge but now I know it wasn’t.
I don’t wonder “will I cry today” but rather “how often and for how long will I cry today”
- I have learned over the past 320 days to allow myself periods of happiness up to 4 or 5 hrs max and that it’s ok to cry - grief is a harsh mistress.
We all have challenges, I’ve realised that too but it doesn’t seem to help me survive my own.


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on June 06, 2020, 08:25:02 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 07, 2020, 01:50:19 am
Hugs
Love my hugs xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 07, 2020, 03:30:39 am
Extra big hug from me as well, think of the fun times dear XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 07, 2020, 03:45:48 am
Love my hugs xxx

Please allow me to offer you a hug as well. - E
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 07, 2020, 01:55:39 pm
Extra big hug from me as well, think of the fun times dear XXXX
Ur so right, it’s so important to remember my thousands of wonderful memories xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 07, 2020, 01:56:34 pm
Please allow me to offer you a hug as well. - E
Of course and thank you so much! Hugs are always welcome xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on June 07, 2020, 02:02:16 pm
Just one week until my daughters birthday  - would have been her 35th.
All things pale to me in comparison - I thought until Siobhan died that transition was my biggest challenge but now I know it wasn’t.
I don’t wonder “will I cry today” but rather “how often and for how long will I cry today”
- I have learned over the past 320 days to allow myself periods of happiness up to 4 or 5 hrs max and that it’s ok to cry - grief is a harsh mistress.
We all have challenges, I’ve realised that too but it doesn’t seem to help me survive my own.


I opened the door and the light shone in

@Pammie

   (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)    (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)    (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)

Many HUGS from me to you!!!
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 07, 2020, 02:03:11 pm
@Pammie

                      (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)

Many HUGS from me to you!!!
Danielle

Thanks so much hun! Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 10, 2020, 05:19:11 pm
It would have been my beautiful daughter Siobhan’s 35th birthday this coming Sunday - i’m really struggling to stay in control. I wrote a poem which kinda explains it........

I just needed to let this out and release my fear.....

Alone, no defence against my darkening thoughts
Isolated and my spirit assailed by rising grief
Defences crumbling at the constant attacks
As I close towards long-feared dates...

For 321 days I have striven to find a way,
A way of living with a broken heart,
A way of crying when I need to but laughing when I can
A way of learning to go on....

But time is no friend, her touch as cold as ice,
Far from blunt sharp memories she heralds dates anew,
Laughter in her cruel voice as I lay unprepared,
For a while I have hidden but now I am laid bare.

‘Tis but a birthday, a chance to celebrate a life
A life which brought such joy, such laughter, such love,
Yet I feel the deep well of my grief internal,
As it rises and rises and stands now but a whisker from my eyes...

Such wonderful family I have and a boyfriend so
true,
Such lovely friends quick to offer support,
Yet still, at times, I face my fears alone,
And fear utter defeat, ruin, the blackness awaits....

I know there is light, aplenty and all around,
I know there is friendship and love and warmth of spirit,
I know there is safety in the arms of my family,
Yet still I fear and know my weaknesses are discovered.....


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on June 10, 2020, 05:27:36 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
Thank you so very much for sharing that heartfelt poem....   it brought tears to my eyes and at the same time it brought tears of joy to me that you were able to write it and share it with me and the rest of your followers here.

Many HUGS and best wishes to you....   even though and very unfortunately she is gone, you still have the memories that no one can ever take away.


HUGS and many more HUGS 
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 11, 2020, 02:37:30 am
Pam dear its great you can put your feelings on paper, that must help. I will be thinking of you on Sunday so a very big HUG to keep you going XXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 11, 2020, 05:04:43 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
Thank you so very much for sharing that heartfelt poem....   it brought tears to my eyes and at the same time it brought tears of joy to me that you were able to write it and share it with me and the rest of your followers here.

Many HUGS and best wishes to you....   even though and very unfortunately she is gone, you still have the memories that no one can ever take away.


HUGS and many more HUGS 
Danielle
Thank you so very much. Hugs always keep me going xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 11, 2020, 05:05:31 pm
Pam dear its great you can put your feelings on paper, that must help. I will be thinking of you on Sunday so a very big HUG to keep you going XXXXX
Thank you Hun! Love my hugs xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 11, 2020, 05:17:20 pm
All the hugs in the world for you on Sunday, Pammie... no parent should ever have to go through that. - E
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on June 11, 2020, 06:29:22 pm
I am so in on the hugs Pammie, so:

HUGS!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 12, 2020, 03:04:11 pm
All the hugs in the world for you on Sunday, Pammie... no parent should ever have to go through that. - E
Thank you so much. I’m collecting all these hugs and taking them with me on Sunday when I go up to Teesside where my little girl lived.
I’m going to need every single one. My heart hurts so much. 9 or 10 times in tears today so far. Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 12, 2020, 03:05:36 pm
I am so in on the hugs Pammie, so:

HUGS!!!
I’m going to need a lorry to carry all these hugs with me on Sunday - thank you so much xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on June 12, 2020, 03:17:23 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 12, 2020, 03:53:42 pm
Hugs
Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 13, 2020, 05:26:58 pm
In 40 mins it will be my beautiful little girl’s birthday but the first since she died. I miss my lovely Siobhan Thomas every single day. I wrote a little poem for her.....

So many smiles, that’s what I remember,
So much love you gave to us all,
So much delight and laughter you brought,
So much to replay in my mind, on permanent loop.

Everyone you touched was eternally enriched.
Everyone you met left with a spring in their step,
Everyone who knew you loved you and loved to see you,
Every one of us feels honoured to have been part of your life.

I have 10,000 memories that help me be positive,
A determination to celebrate your life,
You deserve smiles and laughter not tears and woe,
Bear with me, my darling, daddy is trying so hard.

Your life was a shining light that guided us all,
An example to follow, a template to use,
You brought so much into the world,
And now we all must strive to keep that light shining,

My beautiful little girl, I miss her so much as we all do. Xxxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on June 13, 2020, 08:27:55 pm
Extra special hugs today.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 13, 2020, 09:03:36 pm
Extra special hugs today.
Thank you Hun xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: randim on June 13, 2020, 10:02:55 pm
Thinking of you Pammie. I'm sure it will be difficult. But she will always be in your heart. Sending love your way.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 14, 2020, 02:14:41 am
Thinking of you Pammie. I,m sure it will be difficult. But she will  will always be in your heart. Sending love your way.
Thank you so much xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 14, 2020, 03:46:04 am
Pammie,

Love and Hugs.

Nothing more to say.

Ellie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on June 14, 2020, 07:26:27 am
Pammie,

   
 ((((((    HUG  HUG   )))))))



Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 14, 2020, 08:07:33 am
Pammie,

Love and Hugs.

Nothing more to say.

Ellie
Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on June 14, 2020, 11:32:19 am
Extra hugs today
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 14, 2020, 11:42:22 am
Extra hugs today
Xxx


I opened the door and the light shone in
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on June 15, 2020, 02:26:18 pm
Hugs how are you holding up Pammie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 15, 2020, 03:58:51 pm
Hugs how are you holding up Pammie
In the end my other 3 children and Siobhan’s lovely hubby and I all celebrated my little girls birthday together and laughed and cried together - just what we needed
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200615/fd2dd7ffea97b4d3c85bd2cc3d66322d.jpg)
My other 3 - Jack, Grace and Antony xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 16, 2020, 02:27:45 am
That's great, family support is the BEST XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 16, 2020, 03:27:10 am
That's great, family support is the BEST XXXX
It certainly is! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 16, 2020, 04:18:17 pm
Thank you all for your support and hugs! Really did make me feel part of something really special xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 16, 2020, 04:20:46 pm
Thank you all for your support and hugs! Really did make me feel part of something really special xxx

I know I haven't ever met you, but to me, you are one of my friends. I hope I helped you raise your spirits a little, @Pammie!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 16, 2020, 04:30:55 pm
I know I haven't ever met you, but to me, you are one of my friends. I hope I helped you raise your spirits a little, @Pammie!
You truly did! Thank you Ellie xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on June 16, 2020, 04:52:16 pm
Hugs says it all
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 17, 2020, 05:18:16 pm
Hugs says it all
Hugs right back! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 17, 2020, 05:25:42 pm
Some days I suspect I start overthinking things . Usually when I spend too much time on here and read too many posts. I start worrying about my height, can I be 6’2” and yet pass? Then I worry about the fact that I didn’t consciously know my true self until I was 55 - can I still be genuine? These are 2 of the things that resurface easily!
What I know is that I feel genuine and complete. I have had no doubts since I discovered my true self. I also no longer have that inner voice trying to put up red flags.

So, I need to go with my inner harmony and believe!
We all have our challenges that is quite clear! Xx
Hugs to all! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 18, 2020, 03:00:08 am
Yes Pam go with that part of your brain , you know the just do not the thinking bit!! I suppose its follow your instincts, the part of your brain that floats above and behind your head . Might just be me -----------
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 18, 2020, 03:48:12 am
Yes Pam go with that part of your brain , you know the just do not the thinking bit!! I suppose its follow your instincts, the part of your brain that floats above and behind your head . Might just be me -----------
It’s not just you Hun


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 18, 2020, 10:35:37 am
I can water divine and sex unborn children and have some sixth sense , Davina the witch!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on June 19, 2020, 02:16:14 pm
Some days I suspect I start overthinking things . Usually when I spend too much time on here and read too many posts. I start worrying about my height, can I be 6’2” and yet pass? Then I worry about the fact that I didn’t consciously know my true self until I was 55 - can I still be genuine? These are 2 of the things that resurface easily!
What I know is that I feel genuine and complete. I have had no doubts since I discovered my true self. I also no longer have that inner voice trying to put up red flags.

So, I need to go with my inner harmony and believe!
We all have our challenges that is quite clear! Xx
Hugs to all! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yeah, this is part of the reason I don't spend much time here anymore. Everyone else's experiences can freak you out and make you second guess yourself. You do overthink things. You think what other people go through means you will automatically go through it too. Even though you're in an entirely different part of the world.

Pammie, you're gorgeous. Forget age. Forget all that baggage. Just be you. You know when you know. You know how you know. Everyone is an individual and trying to herd cats is a foolish endeavour. Just be.

You're awesome. :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on June 19, 2020, 03:03:46 pm
Pammie I agree with Sephirah, you are gorgeous both in and out.  For God's sake stay away from my thread!!!

I am poisonously overthinking everything.  ;D ::)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 19, 2020, 03:06:33 pm
I am poisonously overthinking everything.  ;D ::)

Have you tried hypnotherapy or meditation, @Emma1017?

It might help with the overthinking. - E
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 19, 2020, 03:10:25 pm
Yeah, this is part of the reason I don't spend much time here anymore. Everyone else's experiences can freak you out and make you second guess yourself. You do overthink things. You think what other people go through means you will automatically go through it too. Even though you're in an entirely different part of the world.

Pammie, you're gorgeous. Forget age. Forget all that baggage. Just be you. You know when you know. You know how you know. Everyone is an individual and trying to herd cats is a foolish endeavour. Just be.

You're awesome. :)
Thank you so much, i’m lucky in that my boyfriend tells me i’m beautiful so often that I actually believe it some times - some things just don’t get old!
I do just need to chill. xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 19, 2020, 03:12:18 pm
Pammie I agree with Sephirah, you are gorgeous both in and out.  For God's sake stay away from my thread!!!

I am poisonously overthinking everything.  ;D ::)
Emma, you are amazing and have such challenges that you really cannot be accused of overthinking  xxx
I am in awe of your strength and determination


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 19, 2020, 03:15:08 pm
Have you tried hypnotherapy or meditation, @Emma1017?

It might help with the overthinking. - E
I must admit meditation is something I have thought about - I guess i’m a bit strange in that I only have on and off bouts of overthinking - sometimes it’s all background and i’m internally content


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 19, 2020, 03:17:12 pm
I must admit meditation is something I have thought about - I guess i’m a bit strange in that I only have on and off bouts of overthinking - sometimes it’s all background and i’m internally content

Similar here. Sometimes my mine tends to race. I don't know if everybody has that happen to them. It helps to do some mindfulness activities. Doesn't even have to be meditation or hypnotherapy; anything that you have to focus on that "brings you into the zone" will do.

Anything that makes time fly is ideal. - E
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on June 19, 2020, 03:18:17 pm
Actually I do meditate otherwise I would explode....and I add the occasional glass of red wine ;D.
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 19, 2020, 03:29:41 pm
Actually I do meditate otherwise I would explode....and I add the occasional glass of red wine ;D.
I’n my case it’s white wine and far too many glasses!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 19, 2020, 04:23:05 pm
I'm not very girly when it comes to drinks - I still have 500ml bottles of real ale every now and again!

Maybe someday I'll get a cocktail with an umbrella in it or something. Not sure what the umbrella is for in those things. - E
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 20, 2020, 02:19:37 pm
I'm not very girly when it comes to drinks - I still have 500ml bottles of real ale every now and again!

Maybe someday I'll get a cocktail with an umbrella in it or something. Not sure what the umbrella is for in those things. - E
I think not drinking pints any more was on my list if changes to make when I first found myself but I found i didn’t need to be artificial about it because I found my tastes in drinks changed


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 20, 2020, 02:25:19 pm
So tonight i’m planning for my Andy’s birthday tomorrow. I’ve baked a cake and bought the presents and written the birthday card complete with a love poem I wrote. Got his favourite dress ready complete with lacy panties and as it’s his birthday I’ll not need a bra
Preparing to seduce my boyfriend makes me feel oh so feminine!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200620/fd20ce00af887af4958fdd557b902440.jpg)
Casual today

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 20, 2020, 05:39:49 pm
I think not drinking pints any more was on my list if changes to make when I first found myself but I found i didn’t need to be artificial about it because I found my tastes in drinks changed

Serious question... was that an effect of hormones?
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 20, 2020, 06:09:10 pm
Serious question... was that an effect of hormones?
Maybe it was though it may have been part of my internal self-discovery - it took me a year or so to uncover my real identity completely


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 21, 2020, 01:26:12 pm
Only got a couple of hours with my Andy on his birthday but we made the most of it and had a lovely lunchtime together - i’m such a lucky girl
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200621/5cc02c0ca51813f018c1cdd7c14bd793.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 21, 2020, 02:29:32 pm
Only got a couple of hours with my Andy on his birthday but we made the most of it and had a lovely lunchtime together - i’m such a lucky girl

Great to see you smiling again! And that you had a good time!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 21, 2020, 03:01:05 pm
Your Andy is a lucky fella , glad you had a nice time.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 21, 2020, 03:01:40 pm
Great to see you smiling again! And that you had a good time!
Thanks Hun xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 21, 2020, 03:02:21 pm
Your Andy is a lucky fella , glad you had a nice time.
Awwww thanks! He thinks so! 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 21, 2020, 04:23:46 pm
I can’t decide if i’m chilled or slightly annoyed at getting no Father’s Day cards. My eldest Siobhan always sent a card but now she’s gone and my boys and my youngest are not very good with cards!
I think overall i’m chilled


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on June 21, 2020, 07:52:52 pm
I can’t decide if i’m chilled or slightly annoyed at getting no Father’s Day cards. My eldest Siobhan always sent a card but now she’s gone and my boys and my youngest are not very good with cards!
I think overall i’m chilled


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Sometimes males are not that good at sending cards, even on special days.

Chrissy

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 22, 2020, 02:44:04 am
Maybe they think its not appropriate now? But like I told my bunch I am still your dad.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 22, 2020, 02:14:24 pm
Maybe they think its not appropriate now? But like I told my bunch I am still your dad.
I guess it’s a consequence partly of confusion that they naturally feel. I have said from the first that I am not “Paul in a dress” and that in many ways i’m a different person so I can’t then just be dad still -
 One can’t have everything


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 23, 2020, 03:45:27 pm
Countdown to my 60th birthday now, just 8 days away now. I have never felt fitter or more full of life and for Pammie it’s really only my 4th birthday
Good day today. Xxx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200623/07cdc6a27e741d92f294a0ddd57aedc1.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on June 23, 2020, 03:58:59 pm
Nice look Pammie!!!!

Maybe we should start just a "Parents" Day.  I am sure the greeting card folks would be very supportive.

Don't worry Pammie, 60 is the new 50.  Since its really your 4th, you can have an extra slice of cake ;D!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 24, 2020, 03:10:27 am
Nice look Pammie!!!!

Maybe we should start just a "Parents" Day.  I am sure the greeting card folks would be very supportive.

Don't worry Pammie, 60 is the new 50.  Since its really your 4th, you can have an extra slice of cake ;D!
Liking it!
Parents day is an excellent idea too!  Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 24, 2020, 03:53:13 pm
So just 4 days away from my “pammieversary “ the day just 4 years ago I found myself! And just 4 more days after that until my 60th birthday (or my 5th really) - not feeling my age, ran 32 mins for my 6.2km this morning and then went walking in my gorgeous sun dress
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200624/24656588433cef0745396584dbdeb010.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on June 25, 2020, 01:41:54 pm
Countdown to my 60th birthday now, just 8 days away now. I have never felt fitter or more full of life and for Pammie it’s really only my 4th birthday
Good day today. Xxx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200623/07cdc6a27e741d92f294a0ddd57aedc1.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Age is a state of mind. I'm actually 127. ;)

Pammie, I've seen 40 year olds who look more their age than you do. I'm one of them. :P You're gorgeous. Seriously.

It's not how many years in your life, it's how much of your life in each year. Sweetie, you're nailing it. Keep going.

<3
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 25, 2020, 05:23:37 pm
Age is a state of mind. I'm actually 127. ;)

Pammie, I've seen 40 year olds who look more their age than you do. I'm one of them. :P You're gorgeous. Seriously.

It's not how many years in your life, it's how much of your life in each year. Sweetie, you're nailing it. Keep going.

<3
That’s so lovely and I totally agree re age being a state of mind  - thanks Hun! Xxx
Beautiful day today here in Manchester xxx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200625/e7e95b82c06056fd008327fe7e569628.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on June 25, 2020, 07:30:45 pm
Pammie that is such a cool look.  You are gorgeous.  I hope you get a chance to step out!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 26, 2020, 02:51:41 am
Pammie that is such a cool look.  You are gorgeous.  I hope you get a chance to step out!
Awww thanks Hun! Xxx
I managed to get some sun!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 26, 2020, 11:22:44 am
I just want to say how much I appreciate the support on Susan’s - when we all have our own demons, challenges, problems and fears we still take time out to care and worry about and support each other. Thank you all!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200626/5e24db5dfff002aa4846507ae1fd4479.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on June 26, 2020, 01:25:03 pm
I just want to say how much I appreciate the support on Susan’s - when we all have our own demons, challenges, problems and fears we still take time out to care and sorry about and support each other. Thank you all!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200626/5e24db5dfff002aa4846507ae1fd4479.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yeah I have to agree with you there. I've been here a lot of years. And in all the new faces I've seen, new people I've met... one thing doesn't change. You folks are the most incredible, emotionally aware, kind, caring, gentle, supportive and downright awesome people I've ever had the pleasure to know. In a world that can be very dark, and very cruel, people give of their own light to help others find theirs. And this never ceases to amaze me, honestly. The sense of camaraderie, community, and compassion which is prevalent here.

You should all be very, very proud of yourselves. I'm proud of all of you. It's so easy to be wrapped up in your own troubles. To forget the outside world exists. But the people on this site go out of their way to be a shoulder to lean on, a handkerchief for tears... and that voice of encouragement through the milestones you all go through. It's an honour, and a privilege to be among such outstanding people. Keep being you, because you're all awesome.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 26, 2020, 01:36:36 pm
Yeah I have to agree with you there. I've been here a lot of years. And in all the new faces I've seen, new people I've met... one thing doesn't change. You folks are the most incredible, emotionally aware, kind, caring, gentle, supportive and downright awesome people I've ever had the pleasure to know. In a world that can be very dark, and very cruel, people give of their own light to help others find theirs. And this never ceases to amaze me, honestly. The sense of camaraderie, community, and compassion which is prevalent here.

You should all be very, very proud of yourselves. I'm proud of all of you. It's so easy to be wrapped up in your own troubles. To forget the outside world exists. But the people on this site go out of their way to be a shoulder to lean on, a handkerchief for tears... and that voice of encouragement through the milestones you all go through. It's an honour, and a privilege to be among such outstanding people. Keep being you, because you're all awesome.
I think that was exactly what I meant too - but far more eloquently put - thank you Hun xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on June 26, 2020, 01:42:00 pm
Pammie you look great and Sephirah I absolutely agree with you.  This is a great community!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 26, 2020, 01:44:41 pm
Pammie you look great and Sephirah I absolutely agree with you.  This is a great community!
I just love love-in’s!  You two are both sooo lovely! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on June 26, 2020, 02:03:29 pm
Damn, girl. I just now noticed that tattoo on your leg. That looks kind of awesome.

I've been pressured to get a tattoo a few times in my life, being a Navy gal, but never did. I'm scared of needles, lol. But that looks sweet! Is that the only one you have?
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 26, 2020, 02:42:32 pm
Damn, girl. I just now noticed that tattoo on your leg. That looks kind of awesome.

I've been pressured to get a tattoo a few times in my life, being a Navy gal, but never did. I'm scared of needles, lol. But that looks sweet! Is that the only one you have?
I have 3, the visible one you saw is the biggest but I also have a 3 Rose tattoo on my right thigh and a smaller black and white Alice tattoo on my back just under the right shoulder
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200626/4f1737f4ccbe7ed8dffcedda9221ab68.jpg)
You can just see the bottom of the rose tattoo on my right leg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on June 26, 2020, 04:05:05 pm
Wow Sephira totally missed the tattoo. Pammie you are a wild woman!!!  Have great birthday weekend!

Big hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 26, 2020, 05:53:15 pm
Wow Sephira totally missed the tattoo. Pammie you are a wild woman!!!  Have great birthday weekend!

Big hugs,

Emma
Hee hee! Thanks ladies!
The tattoos were a statement of being me, my old shadow Male persona was never a tattoo kind of person


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 27, 2020, 05:21:31 pm
My 4th Pammieversary today. Just 4 years ago that I went to a dressing service and saw the real me. Oh how my world has changed! And mostly for the better!
I’ll never ever forget that moment


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on June 27, 2020, 06:41:05 pm
My 4th Pammieversary today. Just 4 years ago that I went to a dressing service and saw the real me. Oh how my world has changed! And mostly for the better!
I’ll never ever forget that moment


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


Yay!  Happy anniversary!


Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 28, 2020, 02:59:20 am
Celebrate in style  dear XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 28, 2020, 04:21:26 am
Celebrate in style  dear XXXX
I had some champagne and choccies which worked for me!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on June 28, 2020, 08:01:55 am
Yay Pammie!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 29, 2020, 04:29:27 am
I thought I’d reflect my progress via pics from my early days to today as part of my pammieversary celebrations
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200629/e941d0c8445c5bf998b242d470f1592e.jpg)

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200629/55909c6b08509b9d29d351af3a6c151b.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 29, 2020, 04:26:51 pm
Just 2 days left until i’m 60 - mind blowing!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200629/c3b54c9450d32155d4601159adc31290.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on June 29, 2020, 04:33:28 pm
Looking fantastic Pammie!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on June 29, 2020, 05:33:43 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I love the before and after progress that you have achieved...
..thank you for sharing and posting and keeping me and the rest of your followers updated.

You look terrific in your red summer dress...
HUGS,
Danielle

I thought I’d reflect my progress via pics from my early days to today as part of my pammieversary celebrations
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200629/e941d0c8445c5bf998b242d470f1592e.jpg)

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200629/55909c6b08509b9d29d351af3a6c151b.jpg)

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 30, 2020, 03:29:01 am
Looking fantastic Pammie!
Awww thanks xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 30, 2020, 03:30:00 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I love the before and after progress that you have achieved...
..thank you for sharing and posting and keeping me and the rest of your followers updated.

You look terrific in your red summer dress...
HUGS,
Danielle

That’s so lovely of you Danielle, ur so supportive and that really makes a difference - ur a lovely lady xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 30, 2020, 04:09:11 pm
Omg, one more sleep and i’m 60 - completely surreal!
It’s been a momentous decade, the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. I’ve really had to dig deep but i’m stronger than I feared. Life will never be as good without my beautiful daughter Siobhan but I’ve got to make the best of it and being my real self 24x7 brings so much into my life.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on June 30, 2020, 04:55:54 pm
Well let be be the first to wish you a very happy birthday, hope its a good one .XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on June 30, 2020, 05:00:48 pm
Well let be be the first to wish you a very happy birthday, hope its a good one .XXXX
Thanks Hun! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on June 30, 2020, 08:20:01 pm
Omg, one more sleep and i’m 60 - completely surreal!
It’s been a momentous decade, the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. I’ve really had to dig deep but i’m stronger than I feared. Life will never be as good without my beautiful daughter Siobhan but I’ve got to make the best of it and being my real self 24x7 brings so much into my life.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
@Pammie
Dear Pammie
It will soon be your special day ....
and I am wishing you a VERY

        HAPPY BIRTHDAY
       :icon_birthday:  :icon_birthday:  :icon_birthday:

I trust and hope that you will enjoy your day of celebration.
??? Hmm, CAKE ???  Candles ???  Gifts ???  Friends ???  Family ???


***NOTE:  On the day of your birthday be certain to check your profile for a special surprise! :)

Best wishes, and lots of HUGS !!!
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 01, 2020, 02:38:52 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie
It will soon be your special day ....
and I am wishing you a VERY

        HAPPY BIRTHDAY
       :icon_birthday:  :icon_birthday:  :icon_birthday:

I trust and hope that you will enjoy your day of celebration.
??? Hmm, CAKE ???  Candles ???  Gifts ???  Friends ???  Family ???


***NOTE:  On the day of your birthday be certain to check your profile for a special surprise! :)

Best wishes, and lots of HUGS !!!
Danielle

Thank you sooooo much. I’ve had a wonderful birthday!



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on July 01, 2020, 04:56:05 pm
Hugs Happy birthday Pammie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on July 01, 2020, 04:57:44 pm
Happy Birthday, Pammie! :) :) :)

I'm pleased I was able to make this post in time!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 01, 2020, 05:40:35 pm
Hugs Happy birthday Pammie
Thanks Julie! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 01, 2020, 05:41:10 pm
Happy Birthday, Pammie! :) :) :)

I'm pleased I was able to make this post in time!
Thanks Ellie! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 01, 2020, 05:42:56 pm
I’ve had a lovely birthday and been totally spoiled !
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200701/40936c4648e5649c5ff182ab461dca52.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on July 02, 2020, 01:39:52 pm
You're the astrological sign of Cancer. That explains a lot. I can see it in you.

A belated happy birthday, sweetie.

Keep being awesome, okay?

*huggles*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 02, 2020, 01:40:55 pm
You're the astrological sign of Cancer. That explains a lot. I can see it in you.

A belated happy birthday, sweetie.

Keep being awesome, okay?

*huggles*
Thanks Hun! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 02, 2020, 03:14:26 pm
 My first day as a 60 something woman - it’s gonna take some getting used to! Xxx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200702/779915aef18fedc5ac0fecf36566b429.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on July 02, 2020, 03:36:28 pm
Pammie, you don't look a day over 40. Trust me. I should know. I look older than you. X

You're gorgeous. You have a kickass smile. :)

*huggles*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 02, 2020, 03:47:54 pm
Pammie, you don't look a day over 40. Trust me. I should know. I look older than you. X

You're gorgeous. You have a kickass smile. :)

*huggles*
Awww Sephirah, you say the nicest things and you make me feel soooo good! Thank you Hun! Xxx
Ps Sephirah is a lovely name!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on July 02, 2020, 04:15:39 pm
Awww Sephirah, you say the nicest things and you make me feel soooo good! Thank you Hun! Xxx
Ps Sephirah is a lovely name!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Awww thank you. :) I took it from the Kabbalah (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kabbalah). Known as the 'tree of life'. Each point on it, collectively, are known as the Sephiroth, or Sephirot. Individually, they are known as Sephirah. Each of them are a point on the journey of life, and understanding. I felt it fitting. :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 02, 2020, 05:35:04 pm
Awww thank you. :) I took it from the Kabbalah (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kabbalah). Known as the 'tree of life'. Each point on it, collectively, are known as the Sephiroth, or Sephirot. Individually, they are known as Sephirah. Each of them are a point on the journey of life, and understanding. I felt it fitting. :)
Wow, it certainly is apposite! Cool! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 03, 2020, 01:38:50 pm
Tough day today. My boyfriend getting lots of hassle from his brother who basically thinks i’m a freak and doesn’t even accept the concept of trans
Really hits my vulnerabilities
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200703/9ecc5da3e91501cf443f340ef614b3b3.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on July 03, 2020, 07:30:08 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on July 03, 2020, 11:29:44 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
As always I love reading your posts and viewing your pictures that you post....
I like your outfit... looks very good on you.

As for the stuff about your boyfriend's brother....  try to ignore the ignorance...


Here is my big HUG for you!!!!  (https://i.imgur.com/paezNSC.jpg)
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 04, 2020, 03:15:12 am
Yes its there problem not yours , BIG double squishy hugs XXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 04, 2020, 03:44:13 am
Hugs
Thanks Julie . Hugs right back. Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 04, 2020, 03:45:02 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
As always I love reading your posts and viewing your pictures that you post....
I like your outfit... looks very good on you.

As for the stuff about your boyfriend's brother....  try to ignore the ignorance...


Here is my big HUG for you!!!!  (https://i.imgur.com/paezNSC.jpg)
Danielle
As always thank you so much!! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 04, 2020, 03:45:32 am
Yes its there problem not yours , BIG double squishy hugs XXX
I just loooooove hugs!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on July 04, 2020, 08:35:46 am
Here is my belated birthday hug Pammie:

                                                              HUG!!!

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 04, 2020, 01:04:37 pm
Here is my belated birthday hug Pammie:

                                                              HUG!!!
Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 04, 2020, 04:38:26 pm
Got my hair done today! Yay!!!!!!
 (https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200704/c638863f735d66a245428458373d7ecf.jpg)

Birthday part 2 tomorrow up in Teesside- complete with gorgeous cake!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200704/74899518bf89901fc29ea6264e9ef2ac.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on July 06, 2020, 02:30:11 pm
That is some cake. I hope you enjoyed it. :)

Middlesborough fan, huh? :D
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on July 06, 2020, 02:37:54 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
    BEAUTIFUL !!!

Beautiful Cake
Beautiful Flowers
Beautiful Hair
... and a very Beautiful YOU


Thank you for sharing and posting.
HUGS,
Danielle 
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 06, 2020, 03:40:41 pm
That is some cake. I hope you enjoyed it. :)

Middlesborough fan, huh? :D
Boro born and bred!
I had the most amazing birthday! I’m a lucky girl xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 06, 2020, 03:42:22 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
    BEAUTIFUL !!!

Beautiful Cake
Beautiful Flowers
Beautiful Hair
... and a very Beautiful YOU


Thank you for sharing and posting.
HUGS,
Danielle 

Ur sooo kind! Hugs for you too! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on July 06, 2020, 03:43:51 pm
I had the most amazing birthday! I’m a lucky girl xxx

You reap what you sow, Pammie. You have been very supportive around here. Very giving of yourself. And I am sure you're like that away from here, too. A genuinely good soul. You get what you give, sweetie. Be proud of yourself, because I'm proud of you.

*huggles*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 06, 2020, 03:47:05 pm
You reap what you sow, Pammie. You have been very supportive around here. Very giving of yourself. And I am sure you're like that away from here, too. A genuinely good soul. You get what you give, sweetie. Be proud of yourself, because I'm proud of you.

*huggles*
Awwww that brought a little tear - i’m so emotional these days.
Sephirah you are one of the most generous snd supportive girls on here, your  Your praise is praise indeed. Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 08, 2020, 02:29:02 pm
One of the lovely side effects of transition is that life is restarted and renewed - so my 60th birthday was really my 5th . Hence I had gelly and ice cream for my party and cheated at pass the parcel then refused to go to bed early!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 08, 2020, 04:35:02 pm
Thats great as long as you didn't stamp your feet and scream and scream till you were sick, sick, sick !!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 09, 2020, 09:15:21 am
Thats great as long as you didn't stamp your feet and scream and scream till you were sick, sick, sick !!!!
Ah, well I didn’t do that too often!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on July 10, 2020, 10:25:29 am
Happy belated birthday Pammie beautiful "5 year old" lady!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 10, 2020, 01:57:36 pm
Happy belated birthday Pammie beautiful "5 year old" lady!!
Thanks Hun! Xx
Feeling relaxed today!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200710/0d08c1fd4a596985f68a2f763780e1ec.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200710/7b0e698fe700105ab65102e3677f2a72.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: randim on July 10, 2020, 02:13:39 pm
Looking relaxed and lovely.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on July 10, 2020, 02:40:18 pm
Pammie so glad your birthday was excellent!!!!  You deserve it and more!

Hugs,

Emma

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 10, 2020, 03:39:07 pm
Looking relaxed and lovely.
Awwww thanks Hun! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 10, 2020, 03:39:39 pm
Pammie so glad your birthday was excellent!!!!  You deserve it and more!

Hugs,

Emma
Thanks my beautiful Emma, I hope ur doing OK. Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 11, 2020, 10:49:52 am
Good afternoon everyone!
I’m having a really topsy-turvy day today. This morning’s run had an unplanned and unwanted fall in it which has left me bruised and sore and feeling a bit sorry for myself. This morning’s weigh-in showed I’d put 2lbs on in my birthday week which was not totally unexpected but a little disappointing.
My boyfriend thinks that the only place I’ve put weight on is my boobs which is not entirely untrue

Cheered myself up at lunchtime with a visit to see and have lunch with my younger daughter which is always lovely - especially when we talk about lip gloss and eyelashes!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200711/96cb2204a665153a25c799186cd9fe5f.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on July 11, 2020, 11:04:01 am
Good afternoon everyone!
I’m having a really topsy-turvy day today. This morning’s run had an unplanned and unwanted fall in it which has left me bruised and sore and feeling a bit sorry for myself. This morning’s weigh-in showed I’d put 2lbs on in my birthday week which was not totally unexpected but a little disappointing.
My boyfriend thinks that the only place I’ve put weight on is my boobs which is not entirely untrue

Cheered myself up at lunchtime with a visit to see and have lunch with my younger daughter which is always lovely - especially when we talk about lip gloss and eyelashes!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
Good afternoon to you... not quite 8:00AM here.   It will be a fairly cool cloudly day for me today... right now it is 48deg(f) perhaps going up to the low 60's later in the afternoon

I am so sorry to read of your "unwanted fall" while you were out walking this morning... I trust that you did not have any more injuries than a bit bruised and sore..... and a bruised ego.

Only a 2 pound weight gain?   After my daily morning showers I can easily see a +/-  2 pound weight difference... usually it can be attributed to water weight/retention.

The good news is that your boyfriend thinks that the weight is going onto your boobs....  of course that is what a boyfriend will notice and focus their attention on....   ;) ::)

I was glad to read of your girl's lunch with your younger daughter...  it was nice of her to offer some of her thoughts about lip gloss and eye lashes !!!!

Thanks for your update.....   and in the future be very careful when you are out and about walking and other activities... falling is not good!

HUGS, and best wishes to you as always,
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 11, 2020, 11:16:23 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
Good afternoon to you... not quite 8:00AM here.   It will be a fairly cool cloudly day for me today... right now it is 48deg(f) perhaps going up to the low 60's later in the afternoon

I am so sorry to read of your "unwanted fall" while you were out walking this morning... I trust that you did not have any more injuries than a bit bruised and sore..... and a bruised ego.

Only a 2 pound weight gain?   After my daily morning showers I can easily see a +/-  2 pound weight difference... usually it can be attributed to water weight/retention.

The good news is that your boyfriend thinks that the weight is going onto your boobs....  of course that is what a boyfriend will notice and focus their attention on....   ;) ::)

I was glad to read of your girl's lunch with your younger daughter...  it was nice of her to offer some of her thoughts about lip gloss and eye lashes !!!!

Thanks for your update.....   and in the future be very careful when you are out and about walking and other activities... falling is not good!

HUGS, and best wishes to you as always,
Danielle

Thanks Hun! Have a great day! Ps I was running rather than walking so quite a lot of momentum and being 6’2” means it’s a long way down!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on July 11, 2020, 11:18:06 am
Good afternoon everyone!
I’m having a really topsy-turvy day today. This morning’s run had an unplanned and unwanted fall in it which has left me bruised and sore and feeling a bit sorry for myself. This morning’s weigh-in showed I’d put 2lbs on in my birthday week which was not totally unexpected but a little disappointing.
My boyfriend thinks that the only place I’ve put weight on is my boobs which is not entirely untrue

Cheered myself up at lunchtime with a visit to see and have lunch with my younger daughter which is always lovely - especially when we talk about lip gloss and eyelashes!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200711/96cb2204a665153a25c799186cd9fe5f.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


I hope you are feeling better after that fall.

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 11, 2020, 11:20:09 am

I hope you are feeling better after that fall.

Chrissy
Thanks Chrissy! Paracetamol always helps!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 11, 2020, 01:05:12 pm
Easy done  dear, hope its not to bad . Shall I kiss it better XXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 11, 2020, 01:06:17 pm
Easy done  dear, hope its not to bad . Shall I kiss it better XXXX
Hee hee


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on July 11, 2020, 01:43:04 pm
Birthday cake and bigger boobs...Now that's a great birthday gift!!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 11, 2020, 02:27:24 pm
Birthday cake and bigger boobs...Now that's a great birthday gift!!!!
Hee hee - ain’t that the truth! Investing in bigger cup size bras is an absolute pleasure


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on July 12, 2020, 03:34:25 am
Pammie, to get an accurate idea of what your weight is, you need to be weighing yourself daily, as the lovely Danielle said, and then average several measurements.

I'm trying to maintain my weight, and it's going pretty well. My last ten morning weight measurements, always taken while naked and after urinating, are as follows:

63.3kg
63.5kg
63.7kg
64.2kg
63.2kg
64.0kg
63.9kg
64.0kg
64.0kg
62.4kg

As you can see, there is considerable variation from day-to-day, of the order of +/-0.5kg generally, but today's figure is suspiciously low. What you shouldn't do is to take one reading of your weight in isolation, unless you want a rough snapshot of your weight. You particularly should not become despondent if the weight appears to have gone up by a couple of pounds (about 1kg) for no reason.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 12, 2020, 07:34:16 am
Pammie, to get an accurate idea of what your weight is, you need to be weighing yourself daily, as the lovely Danielle said, and then average several measurements.

I'm trying to maintain my weight, and it's going pretty well. My last ten morning weight measurements, always taken while naked and after urinating, are as follows:

63.3kg
63.5kg
63.7kg
64.2kg
63.2kg
64.0kg
63.9kg
64.0kg
64.0kg
62.4kg

As you can see, there is considerable variation from day-to-day, of the order of +/-0.5kg generally, but today's figure is suspiciously low. What you shouldn't do is to take one reading of your weight in isolation, unless you want a rough snapshot of your weight. You particularly should not become despondent if the weight appears to have gone up by a couple of pounds (about 1kg) for no reason.
Thanks Hun!
My boyfriend insists I haven’t put weight on so i’m feeling ok about that
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200712/b4929374d248ab51bea9c04ab0ffb01c.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 13, 2020, 12:47:44 pm
Tough couple of days after a fall on my run on Saturday morning - what an idiot! Hurt my ankle, knee, arm and head and I think I have a cracked rib or two as well
Really felt Ill yesterday but a little better today
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200713/46d0ae4b17ffbaa4c8723dd11eea7668.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 13, 2020, 01:07:28 pm
Oh dear , hope you feel better soon. Looks like you will be taking it easy for a bit.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 13, 2020, 01:28:32 pm
Oh dear , hope you feel better soon. Looks like you will be taking it easy for a bit.
Thanks and yes, at lease a week off exercise


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on July 13, 2020, 03:07:49 pm
Nothing really to say, just to offer a massive hug.

*gentle tacklehugs*

I hope you feel better soon, sweetie. :-*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on July 13, 2020, 03:17:25 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 13, 2020, 03:18:33 pm
Nothing really to say, just to offer a massive hug.

*gentle tacklehugs*

I hope you feel better soon, sweetie. :-*
Thanks Hun! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 13, 2020, 03:19:11 pm
Hugs
Hugs (gentle ones) right back xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on July 13, 2020, 04:12:27 pm
Oh no!
Swift recovery to you Pammie.

Unwavering resilience and gentle days
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on July 13, 2020, 04:30:13 pm
Hugs... gentle ones, not bear hugs...
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 13, 2020, 05:16:36 pm
Oh no!
Swift recovery to you Pammie.

Unwavering resilience and gentle days
Thanks Maddie xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 13, 2020, 05:16:55 pm
Hugs... gentle ones, not bear hugs...
Thanks Ellie xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 14, 2020, 01:36:34 pm
Today’s look is for less warm weather - and still feeling rough!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200714/581370bfbfc5f6653e0a937e88dcbf69.jpg)

Managed at least a walk today which is a step forward


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 16, 2020, 05:28:24 pm
I’m having a tough week, Saturdays fall shook me up a lot and my ribs are still painful. Feeling sorry for myself.
Thank goodness for chocolate and gin!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on July 16, 2020, 05:50:11 pm
I’m having a tough week, Saturdays fall shook me up a lot and my ribs are still painful. Feeling sorry for myself.
Thank goodness for chocolate and gin!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Alright. I'm going to try and make you feel better. If you don't like it... sue me. :P

Pammie... you are gorgeous. You are warm, kind, sweet, gentle, smart, and the world is a better place for you being in it, okay? I know I'm not here a whole lot, but it makes me feel better knowing people like you are. To be that warmth this place needs.

I forgive you for the chocolate comment. (Ewwwwww. :P)

But seriously, sweetie, you should be proud of yourself. You're living a life so many people dare not live, even though it's their heart's greatest desire. You have so much strength inside you. Probably more than you realise. I know there have been debates around this stuff... but I am of the opinion that you need steel in your soul to be able to be yourself. To be able to make the choices you make and stand with your head high. That's testament to you, hon. It's something not everyone can do. So be proud of yourself, okay? Be proud of who you are, the wisdom you've given, and the light inside you. Because I'm extremely proud. And it's a privilege to know you.

Okay only about half of that was to make you feel better. The other half was me not being able to shut up once I got started. :P But you get the point. Pammie, you are a blessing to the world. You really are. You're a shining example of who people can be when they allow themselves to be. Keep being you, okay? Because you're kind of awesome.

*extra big hugs*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on July 16, 2020, 10:34:44 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on July 17, 2020, 12:53:27 am
Pammie, I thought I saw a photo of you somewhere in a dress 👗 that recently arrived in the mail.
Not seeing it now, but it was a cute shot .

May the gin help the chocolate do its best work ;)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 17, 2020, 02:49:37 am
Big HUG from me as well, now red wine and choc -----
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 17, 2020, 03:05:36 am
Alright. I'm going to try and make you feel better. If you don't like it... sue me. :P

Pammie... you are gorgeous. You are warm, kind, sweet, gentle, smart, and the world is a better place for you being in it, okay? I know I'm not here a whole lot, but it makes me feel better knowing people like you are. To be that warmth this place needs.

I forgive you for the chocolate comment. (Ewwwwww. :P)

But seriously, sweetie, you should be proud of yourself. You're living a life so many people dare not live, even though it's their heart's greatest desire. You have so much strength inside you. Probably more than you realise. I know there have been debates around this stuff... but I am of the opinion that you need steel in your soul to be able to be yourself. To be able to make the choices you make and stand with your head high. That's testament to you, hon. It's something not everyone can do. So be proud of yourself, okay? Be proud of who you are, the wisdom you've given, and the light inside you. Because I'm extremely proud. And it's a privilege to know you.

Okay only about half of that was to make you feel better. The other half was me not being able to shut up once I got started. :P But you get the point. Pammie, you are a blessing to the world. You really are. You're a shining example of who people can be when they allow themselves to be. Keep being you, okay? Because you're kind of awesome.

*extra big hugs*
Sephirah, i’m overdosing on feel-good right now! Thank you soooooo much!
Such words make me tingle with pleasure and make me realise how lucky I am! Xxxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 17, 2020, 03:08:49 am
Pammie, I thought I saw a photo of you somewhere in a dress that recently arrived in the mail.
Not seeing it now, but it was a cute shot .

May the gin help the chocolate do its best work ;)
Thank you so much Maddie, it probably wasn’t me but love the thought! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 17, 2020, 03:09:18 am
Hugs
Love my hugs! Here are some for you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: JennyTG on July 17, 2020, 04:15:20 am
Today’s look is for less warm weather - and still feeling rough!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200714/581370bfbfc5f6653e0a937e88dcbf69.jpg)

Managed at least a walk today which is a step forward


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Hope you're feeling better now Pammie.  Accidents happen, I hurt my leg with a ladder inside a week ago, it came crashing down and I took the weight instinctively to save it damaging the wall (it's healing very slowly).  Awesome top you have on btw :)   
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on July 17, 2020, 11:25:11 am
I thought it was you.  You were mentioning kettle bell  exercises for your shoulders/upper arms
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 17, 2020, 01:43:08 pm
I thought it was you.  You were mentioning kettle bell  exercises for your shoulders/upper arms
That sounds like me!
Managed a run today which made me feel better
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200717/c22a5c123e6ee8a522d371e1093cb5a0.jpg)
Coffee time


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on July 18, 2020, 04:36:43 am
Managed a run today which made me feel better

Well done!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 18, 2020, 05:10:17 am
Well done!
Thanks Ellie! Ran again today.
Saturday is my weight day - managed to lose some this week so down to 83.2kg now. I struggle when I see some girls talking 65-67kg but i’m 1.89m talk so I could never be that weight and still be alive!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on July 18, 2020, 06:27:37 am
Thanks Ellie! Ran again today.
Saturday is my weight day - managed to lose some this week so down to 83.2kg now. I struggle when I see some girls talking 65-67kg but i’m 1.89m talk so I could never be that weight and still be alive!

In terms of a BMI, you are already in the healthy weight range - yours is 23.3. You would definitely be underweight if you were 65kg as it would then be 18.2, below the 18.5 minimum at which "normal" weight starts.

I suspect you are fitter than most people, regardless of whether they are men or women.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 18, 2020, 10:00:53 am
In terms of a BMI, you are already in the healthy weight range - yours is 23.3. You would definitely be underweight if you were 65kg as it would then be 18.2, below the 18.5 minimum at which "normal" weight starts.

I suspect you are fitter than most people, regardless of whether they are men or women.
Thanks Ellie! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 18, 2020, 03:24:27 pm
Feeling better today, casual Saturday with rubbish weather!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200718/21a65cedac9a7a0a481be976637140ab.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 18, 2020, 03:40:39 pm
You do casual well dear.XXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on July 18, 2020, 03:41:06 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
You look terrific in your "casual Saturday" photo.
The weight that you are at looks good on you.... so not worries there.

My BMI is usually between 20 and 21 ....   
I am 5' 3"  and stay around 115 pounds.

At one time I tried going lower by I did not like how I felt...
...plus when losing more weight I ended up losing some of my curves that I worked so hard for.

HUGS,
Danielle

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 18, 2020, 03:46:04 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
You look terrific in your "casual Saturday" photo.
The weight that you are at looks good on you.... so not worries there.

My BMI is usually between 20 and 21 ....   
I am 5' 3"  and stay around 115 pounds.

At one time I tried going lower by I did not like how I felt...
...plus when losing more weight I ended up losing some of my curves that I worked so hard for.

HUGS,
Danielle

Thanks Danielle!
I got down to 75kg last year which was a BMI for me of 21 and that was skinny for me and like you say I also lost hard won curves!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 18, 2020, 05:31:13 pm
You do casual well dear.XXX
Awwww thanks! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on July 18, 2020, 05:37:54 pm
At one time I tried going lower by I did not like how I felt...
...plus when losing more weight I ended up losing some of my curves that I worked so hard for.

I relate to the second statement. In a kind of way, anyway... I do have slight curves. I didn't lose them, but my bust measurement became slightly smaller when I lost some weight.

I think it's best for me to remain a size 10 (UK). I'm already in the situation where I would find a lot of difficulty finding men's clothes that fit. I don't want to get into a situation where I would find a lot of difficulty finding women's clothes that fit... you can find clothes in size 8 or even size 6 in some places but they are quite a bit rarer!

I've also done some research on the hourglass thing. Apparently it's pretty much an indicator that you are healthy and you have not had your first child. A high proportion of women fit the rectangle body shape. I'm cool with that, because that's where I am, albeit fairly close to the hourglass shape. That'll do me!

At least, I keep trying to convince myself of that...
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 18, 2020, 05:55:11 pm
I relate to the second statement. In a kind of way, anyway... I do have slight curves. I didn't lose them, but my bust measurement became slightly smaller when I lost some weight.

I think it's best for me to remain a size 10 (UK). I'm already in the situation where I would find a lot of difficulty finding men's clothes that fit. I don't want to get into a situation where I would find a lot of difficulty finding women's clothes that fit... you can find clothes in size 8 or even size 6 in some places but they are quite a bit rarer!

I've also done some research on the hourglass thing. Apparently it's pretty much an indicator that you are healthy and you have not had your first child. A high proportion of women fit the rectangle body shape. I'm cool with that, because that's where I am, albeit fairly close to the hourglass shape. That'll do me!

At least, I keep trying to convince myself of that...
I agree! I’m a uk 10 for trousers and skirts (and knicks of course!) but a 12 or even 14 for most tops and dresses and even when I was down to 75kg I couldn’t get away with size 10 tops or dresses


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on July 19, 2020, 12:17:21 am
Pammie so glad that you are feeling better.   Hmmm gin and chocolate.  I have to try that some day.

Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 19, 2020, 05:29:50 am
Pammie so glad that you are feeling better.   Hmmm gin and chocolate.  I have to try that some day.

Hugs,

Emma
Thanks Emma, it is basically 21st century nectar and ambrosia


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 20, 2020, 02:00:08 pm
I’m still not sure I do Monday’s!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200720/07a2a826f130c2cc1e76b8af5e285602.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 20, 2020, 02:06:00 pm
Looks like Monday to me
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 20, 2020, 02:08:23 pm
Looks like Monday to me



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 21, 2020, 11:11:18 am
Today was my first day in the office for 4 months! A very different place to be honest! But all well organised and completely safe. Got the train to work and that was so quiet and somewhat spooky!
Made a nice change from home alone!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200721/bfc766c789f0ed32eda67b45de86bdfe.jpg)

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200721/6d1154991f7e67bcda043dba7e29de8c.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on July 21, 2020, 11:33:47 am
Nice office Pammie!

Glad you are enjoying the change from home.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on July 21, 2020, 12:19:57 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:

I love your "look" in your summer clothes... and your big and happy smile.

Yes indeed it is nice to finally get out and about, out of your home, and you can now go to work in your place of business in your very "neat and well organized" office.

Thank you for your postings, keeping me and the rest of your followers updated regarding your life and your transition journeys.

I really enjoy viewing your frequent pictures that you post.


HUGS and best wishes as always,
Danielle


Today was my first day in the office for 4 months! A very different place to be honest! But all well organised and completely safe. Got the train to work and that was so quiet and somewhat spooky!
Made a nice change from home alone!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200721/bfc766c789f0ed32eda67b45de86bdfe.jpg)

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200721/6d1154991f7e67bcda043dba7e29de8c.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 21, 2020, 01:40:37 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:

I love your "look" in your summer clothes... and your big and happy smile.

Yes indeed it is nice to finally get out and about, out of your home, and you can now go to work in your place of business in your very "neat and well organized" office.

Thank you for your postings, keeping me and the rest of your followers updated regarding your life and your transition journeys.

I really enjoy viewing your frequent pictures that you post.


HUGS and best wishes as always,
Danielle

Danielle, u r so supportive and encouraging - my absolute role model on Susan’s - we are lucky to have you!
I love to read your posts too in a very different world to mine xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on July 21, 2020, 03:56:06 pm
Danielle, u r so supportive and encouraging - my absolute role model on Susan’s - we are lucky to have you!
I love to read your posts too in a very different world to mine xx

I wonder if Danielle is in our "not in the club yet" club... or if she has left that club? :)

I'm sure this will be confusing for everyone but you and me, Pammie!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 21, 2020, 04:09:16 pm
I wonder if Danielle is in our "not in the club yet" club... or if she has left that club? :)

I'm sure this will be confusing for everyone but you and me, Pammie!
It’s an important question!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on July 21, 2020, 04:30:42 pm
@Pammie   @Ellie_Arroway
Dear Pammie and Ellie:
Certainly CONFUSING FOR ME !!!
Please help me out but if it is an" inside secret" and not to be disclosed I fully understand.


HUGS to both of you, 
Danielle


I wonder if Danielle is in our "not in the club yet" club... or if she has left that club? :)

I'm sure this will be confusing for everyone but you and me, Pammie!

It’s an important question!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 21, 2020, 06:01:36 pm
@Pammie   @Ellie_Arroway
Dear Pammie and Ellie:
Certainly CONFUSING FOR ME !!!
Please help me out but if it is an" inside secret" and not to be disclosed I fully understand.


HUGS to both of you, 
Danielle

Hee hee,,sorry Danielle! It’s not an inside secret. Ellie and I are both pre-op so not yet in the “club” of those who have had GCS so we have formed a “not yet in the club” club
We weren’t sure if you had already had GCS or, indeed, if you were planning it otherwise


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 22, 2020, 03:13:58 pm
I’m just 2 days away from the first anniversary of the absolute worst day of my life - when my beautiful daughter Siobhan died.
It’s so hard to smile when all I really want to do is cry.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200722/2a7bc727ec8b42d93692a6c74a2637c8.jpg)
That’s the best I can do today xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on July 22, 2020, 03:28:03 pm
Hee hee,,sorry Danielle! It’s not an inside secret. Ellie and I are both pre-op so not yet in the “club” of those who have had GCS so we have formed a “not yet in the club” club
We weren’t sure if you had already had GCS or, indeed, if you were planning it otherwise


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
@Pammie   @Ellie_Arroway
To answer both of you ladies question.....
I am in the "all done" club.  I was fortunate that my unique genes cooperated with HRT so I did NOT have to have other surgery procedures such as FFS, BA or VFS.   I count myself very, very fortunate because I do know that there are my transition journey friends here that are "looking forward" to those things to help complete their journey.
HUGS and best wishes...   
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on July 22, 2020, 04:22:48 pm
I’m just 2 days away from the first anniversary of the absolute worst day of my life - when my beautiful daughter Siobhan died.
It’s so hard to smile when all I really want to do is cry.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200722/2a7bc727ec8b42d93692a6c74a2637c8.jpg)
That’s the best I can do today xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Pammie, she knows how much you loved her. How much she meant to you. Wherever she is, I am sure of it. And I am sure she is proud of you, sweetie. Of who you are, and who you've grown to be. I am sure she is smiling at you, wanting the best for you.

People in our lives are never truly gone, sweetie. Not while they still live in our hearts. Siobhan is a part of you, as you are a part of her. And nothing can ever take that away from both of you, okay?

Hang in there, hon. I know a lot of how you are feeling. You are still with each other. Holding onto each other. From what I've seen you one of the best kind of mums a daughter could ever have had. And from what you've said of her, she is also someone special. That bond is eternal, Pammie. It will never leave either of you.

*extra big hugs*

Hang on to what you had, not what you've lost, okay? Let that give you strength.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on July 22, 2020, 04:30:21 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I have no words but I do give you lots of loving HUGS for you......

  (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)
HUGS,
Danielle


I’m just 2 days away from the first anniversary of the absolute worst day of my life - when my beautiful daughter Siobhan died.
It’s so hard to smile when all I really want to do is cry.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200722/2a7bc727ec8b42d93692a6c74a2637c8.jpg)
That’s the best I can do today xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 23, 2020, 03:33:51 am
Pammie, she knows how much you loved her. How much she meant to you. Wherever she is, I am sure of it. And I am sure she is proud of you, sweetie. Of who you are, and who you've grown to be. I am sure she is smiling at you, wanting the best for you.

People in our lives are never truly gone, sweetie. Not while they still live in our hearts. Siobhan is a part of you, as you are a part of her. And nothing can ever take that away from both of you, okay?

Hang in there, hon. I know a lot of how you are feeling. You are still with each other. Holding onto each other. From what I've seen you one of the best kind of mums a daughter could ever have had. And from what you've said of her, she is also someone special. That bond is eternal, Pammie. It will never leave either of you.

*extra big hugs*

Hang on to what you had, not what you've lost, okay? Let that give you strength.
That’s so lovely - thank you Sephirah! Xxx
Hugs right back!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 23, 2020, 03:34:11 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I have no words but I do give you lots of loving HUGS for you......

  (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg)
HUGS,
Danielle

Thanks Danielle! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on July 23, 2020, 08:57:48 am
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 23, 2020, 12:57:38 pm
Hugs
Thanks Hun! (https://i.imgur.com/hgBDhNy.png)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 23, 2020, 04:21:53 pm
Alcohol - check
Chocolate - check

Ok. Started preparing for the anniversary
I have tried so hard to find positivity and think of all the good memories of my little girl but I am submerged by despair
Still managed to do my workout though!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200723/c1ee9b103d63015db4beceb027c57ca3.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on July 23, 2020, 05:19:27 pm
Pammie I truly hope you can find joy in your memories and not despair in your loss.  I like to believe that the ones we lost demand it of us.  I like to think of heaven as a pub where I know the owner and everyone is a friend or family :).

Raise a glass and share a smile!


Warm hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 24, 2020, 02:36:57 am
Now Emma's post made me go "Hi Norm" !!!! Lock those bad feelings away and think of the good times , BIG HUGGLES XXXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 24, 2020, 11:18:12 am
Pammie I truly hope you can find joy in your memories and not despair in your loss.  I like to believe that the ones we lost demand it of us.  I like to think of heaven as a pub where I know the owner and everyone is a friend or family :).

Raise a glass and share a smile!


Warm hugs,

Emma
Thank you so much Emma! Generally I handle it reasonably well and i’m ok with crying when I need to but this, the first anniversary, has really got through my defences xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 24, 2020, 11:18:33 am
Now Emma's post made me go "Hi Norm" !!!! Lock those bad feelings away and think of the good times , BIG HUGGLES XXXXXX
Thanks, i’m trying! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on July 24, 2020, 05:02:02 pm
@Pammie   @Ellie_Arroway
To answer both of you ladies question.....
I am in the "all done" club.  I was fortunate that my unique genes cooperated with HRT so I did NOT have to have other surgery procedures such as FFS, BA or VFS.   I count myself very, very fortunate because I do know that there are my transition journey friends here that are "looking forward" to those things to help complete their journey.
HUGS and best wishes...   
Danielle


You didn't have to answer!

You kind of make me feel as if Pammie and I concocted an elaborate plan to determine your operational status! That was definitely NOT the case...

I am happy for you!

I don't believe I will need any other surgeries either... but I guess it remains to be seen. Right now, I feel like I wouldn't need them, but one effect of HRT is to alter the brain, and I don't know how that will go for me.

I'm not flat as a pancake though; I have pretty clear A cups, and whilst they are obviously not large, I don't feel the need for BA. I think my face is feminine enough already. And I don't think I want a tracheal shave...
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on July 25, 2020, 08:54:54 am
Hugs
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 25, 2020, 02:45:26 pm
Well, I was a complete write-off last night. Hid behind a curtain of alcohol and tried not to think about the loss of my beautiful little girl 12 months ago.
I guess it worked but i’m not real proud.
Feeling oh so fragile.
 (https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200725/37b3bf7c105b01eddea0a5613f19ef09.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on July 26, 2020, 10:12:43 am
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 26, 2020, 12:21:46 pm
Hugs
Thanks Hun xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Maddie on July 26, 2020, 12:43:03 pm
Yeah.
Not a happy picture.
Appreciate that it's honest.
I like that about you Pammie. 
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 26, 2020, 12:47:09 pm
Yeah.
Not a happy picture.
Appreciate that it's honest.
I like that about you Pammie.
Thanks Maddie. I’m starting to feel a little better now.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200726/fa622b2722c65495f8c7c56c51dbdb0c.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 27, 2020, 01:27:15 pm
I’m off work for a week which is lovely and soooooo needed! I’m up in Teesside with my younger grandsons and it’s a lovely change xxx
After a tough week including my big brother continuing to be as horrible as he can be as well as the horrible anniversary at last some chill time
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200727/48744bc155512c89fadbf6d9b9fab657.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 27, 2020, 02:10:29 pm
That will keep you on your toes!! Enjoy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 27, 2020, 02:56:19 pm
That will keep you on your toes!! Enjoy
Oh yes but I love my granpam time! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 29, 2020, 01:49:37 pm
Had a hot tub and alcohol evening yesterday! Loads of gin and put the world to rights!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200729/c1a18d29c1b449ab5869b4d959f9a8f9.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200729/8dfd05452734f62a3a543887cd2902aa.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on July 29, 2020, 02:31:27 pm
Hot tub, hugs and champagne...Excellent just what you needed and deserve Pammie!

Another big hug,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 29, 2020, 02:32:21 pm
Wonderful, XXXXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 29, 2020, 05:10:18 pm
Hot tub, hugs and champagne...Excellent just what you needed and deserve Pammie!

Another big hug,

Emma
Thanks Emma, hugs right back! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on July 30, 2020, 09:17:17 am
Glad you found a reason to smile again hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 30, 2020, 09:23:14 am
Glad you found a reason to smile again hugs
Thanks Julie! Hugs for you too xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on July 31, 2020, 01:12:36 pm
Beautiful day in Teesside today so on the beach - contrast of the cold north sea and 30c temperatures was wonderful!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200731/13b2731609077ed65ac537d3684797f8.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on July 31, 2020, 01:56:35 pm
hope you got a nice tan, XXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on July 31, 2020, 02:39:44 pm
Excellent way to spend a day!  Looks windy...that definitely works in the summer heat.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 01, 2020, 07:52:41 am
hope you got a nice tan, XXX
Not complaining anyway!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 01, 2020, 07:53:38 am
Excellent way to spend a day!  Looks windy...that definitely works in the summer heat.
Wonderful combination of heat, cooling sea breeze and cold North Sea!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 01, 2020, 09:31:36 am
Dead pleased with my hair today!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200801/221f1db70a443871ebb02f7f21e4fcba.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 02, 2020, 05:41:20 pm
My littlest grandson Sam celebrated his 6th birthday today - his second without his mum - bittersweet but lots to enjoy too. Xx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200802/2baee1f88c7f5a7ce07e6bf3777f2dd4.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 04, 2020, 03:18:41 pm
Ooh, just 3 days until the third anniversary of my official transition date - I cant believe it’s only been 3 years, I can’t remember anything much about the time me before then!
Friday will be time for then and now pics methinks! Xx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200804/32fc72b1004b0ea87ac2f243b502dbe4.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on August 04, 2020, 04:04:06 pm
Well I was about to turn laptop off and thought best check if Pam has posted!! Time flies dear, cant believe I am close to 3 years full time.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 04, 2020, 04:26:36 pm
Well I was about to turn laptop off and thought best check if Pam has posted!! Time flies dear, cant believe I am close to 3 years full time.
Can you even remember the old days?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on August 05, 2020, 11:48:38 am
Congratulations on 3 years :)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 05, 2020, 12:34:30 pm
Congratulations on 3 years :)
Thanks - still 2 days away though!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 05, 2020, 01:54:44 pm
Ooh only 2 days to go now! To celebrate my 3 year anniversary i’m getting a new tattoo, only a small one on my right forearm but it will be my 4th
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200805/b16eb192448273989f1b19f43d898e6a.jpg)
In an orange frame of mind


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 07, 2020, 11:52:53 am
Yay, 3rd pammieversary day!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200807/c1b2bc9812e006e78b88814d46adeb3f.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200807/a7d4be6c4f75c988260521b407d9edd3.jpg)
My new tattoo, representing my 4 children xxx

And finally a pic from my first day full time, .3 years ago!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200807/d1e803a054d8f98d17a66d99ac65df2e.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on August 07, 2020, 01:57:30 pm
I hope you had a Pamtastic Pammieversary!

And here's to 30 more!

*huggles*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 07, 2020, 02:16:53 pm
I hope you had a Pamtastic Pammieversary!

And here's to 30 more!

*huggles*
Awwwww thanks!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 09, 2020, 04:52:19 pm
Good evening everyone! It’s been a tough week with more anniversaries of my daughter’s passing (funeral was exactly one year ago) but i’m trying hard to get through it all.
Lovely weather today here anyway.

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200809/b764b04c50b93a977afcf3ce01e2555f.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on August 09, 2020, 08:17:30 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 10, 2020, 05:16:27 pm
Hugs
Thanks Hun xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on August 10, 2020, 05:53:19 pm
Great pictures Pammie and congratulations for leading the way for me and many others.

Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 11, 2020, 02:24:54 am
Great pictures Pammie and congratulations for leading the way for me and many others.

Hugs,

Emma
Awwww thanks Emma! Hugs for you too xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on August 11, 2020, 06:32:06 pm
Hugs are always appreciated and always reciprocated ;D.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 12, 2020, 04:47:07 pm
I reflected today how absolutely wonderful it is that I was out with my youngest daughter and my boyfriend last night! She struggled so much for the first couple of years and again after we lost her big sister Siobhan last year.
Time really can make such a difference!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200812/2539fdb6f7848d236c6f86afb19c2a1c.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on August 13, 2020, 02:38:14 am
Where is the tennis racket?? Looking cool dear XXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 13, 2020, 08:43:41 am
Where is the tennis racket?? Looking cool dear XXX
Good point re racket!
I do play tennis funnily enough


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 13, 2020, 05:08:24 pm
Another really warm day today - meant I got up extra early to go for my run and managed about PB!
Had a lovely walk along the river very after work too!
Tired but feeling so glad I get to be me all the time
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200813/e58470782419998d7dd4875407930919.jpg)
Hi


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 14, 2020, 05:13:54 pm
One of my favourite things in the whole world is my visits to the beauty salon for hair and nails.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200814/edb38b82ecfc3f7d90607d24a86e3577.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on August 15, 2020, 02:24:55 am
looking great dear, now if only I had hair------
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Jessica_K on August 15, 2020, 03:06:49 am
looking great dear, now if only I had hair------
Me too! Though I love getting my nails done, note to self book to see Lauren next week my gels are starting to grow out.

Jessica xx
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 17, 2020, 02:31:51 pm
Our for a walk and was complimented on my red outfit (oops no picture - not like me) - gad a lovely chat with a girl walking her dog who told me I should be going out looking that good - still smiling!!! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 18, 2020, 02:50:37 pm
Off to Turkey for a week on Sunday - bought something me new holiday clothes
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200818/43afee27179f9321be0157498ba8b928.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200818/afc95fb64762d6eabd565ca1c8cc3fc3.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on August 18, 2020, 03:58:54 pm
Have a good time , stay safe and watch the sun burn!!!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 18, 2020, 04:44:44 pm
Have a good time , stay safe and watch the sun burn!!!!!
Thanks Hun! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 20, 2020, 04:41:29 pm
Trying for the smart professional look today
On holiday next week and boy do I need a break. I’ve worked from home during lockdown and been so very busy, worked 15-20 hrs a week extra!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200820/23d31722d0cd24296a81d5f961288a5c.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 22, 2020, 11:30:22 pm
At the airport hotel and can’t sleep - too excited!
Looking forward to some sun!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200823/52cda88a9c4875133a681bf42ef3b29d.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on August 23, 2020, 02:18:03 am
 :icon_geekdance:
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 23, 2020, 04:11:25 pm
:icon_geekdance:
Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on August 23, 2020, 04:55:52 pm
Pammie enjoy the well earned vacation!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on August 23, 2020, 05:16:33 pm
Trying for the smart professional look today
On holiday next week and boy do I need a break. I’ve worked from home during lockdown and been so very busy, worked 15-20 hrs a week extra!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200820/23d31722d0cd24296a81d5f961288a5c.jpg)



Try to relax.  Enjoy your vacation.    :)

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 24, 2020, 02:59:09 pm

Try to relax.  Enjoy your vacation.    :)

Chrissy
Having a very relaxed time and so needed!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200824/b27c7fd105ad07348c5818d09d6a0650.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200824/41501137deff9a883ecb6e38e5dc8963.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200824/a9e53a301551d0b14b657a83aeffbdc7.plist)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200824/b590eebc06ba56a5727d5d5b9992b6fd.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on August 24, 2020, 04:33:09 pm
Wow those are huge sunglasses!  (Not a criticism).

Cool.


Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 24, 2020, 11:04:45 pm
Wow those are huge sunglasses!  (Not a criticism).

Cool.


Chrissy
Hee hee, aren’t they! Love them! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 25, 2020, 04:01:14 pm
I do love sunbathing!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200825/9572e29df5d3399aab562284ddea1769.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 27, 2020, 02:48:17 pm
Lying on my sun bed today and contemplating life, as you do!
I know there have been posts asking if people wish they had been born cis rather than trans or wish they had known much earlier that they were trans (for those of us unearthing our true selves later In life). I have always replied that I have fathered 4 wonderful children and how could i possibly change anything about that!
BUT, there is a but......

I still feel incredibly sad that I didn’t get to live the complete life I really should have had.
I look at young girls and think how i never got to experience that, nor female  puberty and, of course, never got to carry a child. I do think I’ve been robbed of so much but I know there is nothing to be gained by focussing on what is just dreams.

Still loving every day of my Pammie life.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200827/a017cadbb99e0c024f22dd15316f0db9.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200827/27dc8d330afabf1ba6d80de6506c23c4.plist)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 31, 2020, 12:10:48 pm
Home again from holiday - well, at son-in-law’s helping with the boys.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200831/f9eb0073f35c306dabdf0ae10deb8088.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on August 31, 2020, 12:59:22 pm
Glad you got back okay and not having to self isolate !
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on August 31, 2020, 01:35:05 pm
Glad you got back okay and not having to self isolate !
Thanks! Xx
I actually had a great week and felt confident enough to mainly wear bikinis. My son in law reckoned I passed all week and I certainly felt I did. Got a great tan and feeling great about myself! My voice had a great week too!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: MikaelaA on August 31, 2020, 06:39:46 pm
Hi Pammie, 

You look amazing as always and seem to be really enjoying the warm weather.


Hugs,

Mikaela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 01, 2020, 03:49:47 am
Hi Pammie, 

You look amazing as always and seem to be really enjoying the warm weather.


Hugs,

Mikaela
Thanks Mikaela! xx
I loved the weather! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 06, 2020, 02:07:13 pm
Home after a fabulous weekend with my wonderful boyfriend - he just makes me feel so feminine and even - dare I say it - sexy!
I’m just madly in love!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200906/1ad7a5232c488e855a8321b97ba5ece3.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200906/8637e6f33ef42e34d188333010168c65.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 10, 2020, 02:12:40 pm
My son-in-law’s 40th birthday this week - good excuse for dressing up
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200910/5077d14cfde82d83941b96a66175b788.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200910/c5764df389de0498ea72355955358fa6.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200910/bea5d55a07d4ca9b8755cf8141064624.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on September 10, 2020, 04:49:35 pm
Any excuse is a good excuse , have a flat inspection tomorrow morning so will make the effort !!Any excuse to look good.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 12, 2020, 03:21:08 pm
Any excuse is a good excuse , have a flat inspection tomorrow morning so will make the effort !!Any excuse to look good.
Absolutely right hun! Xxx
Happy Saturday evening to all my trans sisters and brothers xxx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200912/8a96277aeaf6622dec2bc63160fc4b0f.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200912/32b6521526eb1200df72ed88af673180.jpg)
I


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 14, 2020, 01:59:18 pm
Some days are just horrible - just yet another trial when I keep hoping I’ve gone through enough.
As if realising i’m trans wasn’t enough, then my beautiful first born Siobhan died aged just 34. Learning to cope with that and changing my whole life style to spend every weekend with my son in law and the 2 boys who lost their mummy. - 260 miles every weekend. But no, still not enough. My daughter in law doesn’t like the fact i’m coming up to Teesside to help with the boys and prioritising that over spending time with them. Now i’m a <poo> parent too it seems.
Sometimes there are just too many hurdles to manage.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on September 14, 2020, 02:43:45 pm
Pammie I am so sorry to hear that.  You deserve so much better than the pettiness of your daughter-in- law.

Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 14, 2020, 02:47:35 pm
Pammie I am so sorry to hear that.  You deserve so much better than the pettiness of your daughter-in- law.

Hugs,

Emma
Thanks Emma. Definitely a needing hugs kinda evening xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on September 14, 2020, 03:39:53 pm
HUGS , all I can say is some people----------
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 14, 2020, 03:45:10 pm
HUGS , all I can say is some people----------
Thanks Davina, i’m resorting to the tried and tested tonight. Candle lit for my little girl, bottle of wine out and family bar of dairy milk caramel chocolate - pj’s and  duvet and girlie film! Xxxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: SarahEL on September 14, 2020, 05:42:49 pm
Some days are just horrible - just yet another trial when I keep hoping I’ve gone through enough.
As if realising i’m trans wasn’t enough, then my beautiful first born Siobhan died aged just 34. Learning to cope with that and changing my whole life style to spend every weekend with my son in law and the 2 boys who lost their mummy. - 260 miles every weekend. But no, still not enough. My daughter in law doesn’t like the fact i’m coming up to Teesside to help with the boys and prioritising that over spending time with them. Now i’m a <poo> parent too it seems.
Sometimes there are just too many hurdles to manage.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Sorry to hear this Pammie - Hugs to you.. With some people you just can not do right for doing wrong.....So your best doing what you think is best and damn the torpedo's...
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 15, 2020, 04:16:11 am
Sorry to hear this Pammie - Hugs to you.. With some people you just can not do right for doing wrong.....So your best doing what you think is best and damn the torpedo's...
Thank you! I think u r absolutely right! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on September 15, 2020, 06:50:48 am
Just another hug from me :).

Have a wonderful day,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 15, 2020, 12:57:17 pm
Just another hug from me :).

Have a wonderful day,

Emma
Thanks Emma  - hugs keep me going xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on September 15, 2020, 02:01:54 pm
Some days are just horrible - just yet another trial when I keep hoping I’ve gone through enough.
As if realising i’m trans wasn’t enough, then my beautiful first born Siobhan died aged just 34. Learning to cope with that and changing my whole life style to spend every weekend with my son in law and the 2 boys who lost their mummy. - 260 miles every weekend. But no, still not enough. My daughter in law doesn’t like the fact i’m coming up to Teesside to help with the boys and prioritising that over spending time with them. Now i’m a <not allowed> parent too it seems.
Sometimes there are just too many hurdles to manage.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Pammie, I'm going to tell you why you shouldn't give two hoots to what your daughter in law thinks, okay?

My dad left when I was 6 years old, leaving my mum to raise 3 kids by herself. I know it isn't close to the same thing, but the effect was similar. The biggest stabilising influence in my life throughout my childhood, until I went away to sea, was my granddad. He stepped in to fill a surrogate parent role. And in doing so, he did a lot for both his daughter and her kids. I owe a lot of who I am to him. I could have turned out to be an angry, hateful person.

What you're doing... is the right thing. The best thing. And somewhere down the road, your grandkids will be thankful and appreciative of it. Your son, too. Forget all this BS about not being a good parent... what you're doing... sweetie, you are the best kind of parent and I wish there were more in the world like you.

Don't let petty jealousy get you down, okay? Keep doing what you're doing. Because as a kid raised in that kind of environment... let me tell you... it helps more than you will ever know. You are a very beautiful, kind, gentle person. Very maternal. Keep being you, okay?

*massive hugs*
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 15, 2020, 02:59:13 pm
Pammie, I'm going to tell you why you shouldn't give two hoots to what your daughter in law thinks, okay?

My dad left when I was 6 years old, leaving my mum to raise 3 kids by herself. I know it isn't close to the same thing, but the effect was similar. The biggest stabilising influence in my life throughout my childhood, until I went away to sea, was my granddad. He stepped in to fill a surrogate parent role. And in doing so, he did a lot for both his daughter and her kids. I owe a lot of who I am to him. I could have turned out to be an angry, hateful person.

What you're doing... is the right thing. The best thing. And somewhere down the road, your grandkids will be thankful and appreciative of it. Your son, too. Forget all this BS about not being a good parent... what you're doing... sweetie, you are the best kind of parent and I wish there were more in the world like you.

Don't let petty jealousy get you down, okay? Keep doing what you're doing. Because as a kid raised in that kind of environment... let me tell you... it helps more than you will ever know. You are a very beautiful, kind, gentle person. Very maternal. Keep being you, okay?

*massive hugs*
Thank you so much! That does help and I think I know I just need to keep doing my best - loving my hugs xxxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 20, 2020, 01:26:44 pm
Yesterday evening was spent with my niece who was my Siobhan’s cousin and best friend. We reminisced and discussed just how hard it is for both of us that Siobhan’s wonderful hubby now has a girlfriend.
I’m working so hard to embrace that and be supportive but it’s not easy. We both agreed our life’s have changed forever.

The fact is that upto the day before my little girl died I thought discovering I was trans and then transitioning would be the biggest challenges of my life but I was so wrong.
Losing Siobhan stripped everything else away and just left the pure, simple Pammie.
I stopped worrying about what people thought because it didn’t matter.
I’ve noticed the last few months I’ve started worrying about passing again so I’ve given myself a  mental slap because it really is not important.
So i’m just me, this is the real me and my Granpam role is the single biggest thing in my life. Love being a grandma.
Going to try to not forget that passing is a triviality.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on September 20, 2020, 02:06:44 pm
Never bothered me as didn't expect to pass ever , then found I do sometimes!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 20, 2020, 04:33:00 pm
Never bothered me as didn't expect to pass ever , then found I do sometimes!!!
Which must be nice even if it’s not something you worry about.
I’m going to try to not focus on passing and just remember what is really important is to make the most of life while we can x


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 21, 2020, 05:01:19 pm
Definitely in a difficult period right now - so many challenges but still trying to smile
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200921/158e825cf73aa13f2b4a133ae94b6650.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 22, 2020, 03:44:21 pm
One last warm day so making the most of it with a walk into town to organise my top-up laser hair removal
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200922/fc9e2a0ee89d5932bb497f1ff42b5ac0.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on September 22, 2020, 03:55:03 pm
One last warm day so making the most of it with a walk into town to organise my top-up laser hair removal
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200922/fc9e2a0ee89d5932bb497f1ff42b5ac0.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
I love your outfit today! I wish I had the legs to pull off a short dress!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 22, 2020, 04:17:49 pm
I love your outfit today! I wish I had the legs to pull off a short dress!

Caela
Awwww thanks! Legs are my best asset so I do try to emphasise- distracts from my less good features (of which there are too many!) xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on September 22, 2020, 04:20:32 pm
Looking great Pam, thermals on tomorrow!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 22, 2020, 04:37:02 pm
Looking great Pam, thermals on tomorrow!!
I know! I was making the most of one last warm day!

Thanks Hun! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 23, 2020, 12:13:36 pm
So I was feeling mischievous today and in the mood to tempt my boyfriend to come over to make the most of lunchtime! So I sent him this pic
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200923/08147000b258e1f15cc11541545c61c1.jpg)
I know, i’m such a wanton hussy!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on September 23, 2020, 12:52:09 pm
oh matron!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 23, 2020, 01:32:12 pm
oh matron!!!
(https://media4.giphy.com/media/ZqlvCTNHpqrio/giphy.gif)
(https://media4.giphy.com/media/ZqlvCTNHpqrio/giphy.gif)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on September 24, 2020, 03:36:06 pm
Hehehe, Pammie, and you shared that pic here for the rest of the world to see  ;D ;D ;D

Just one thing I would like to say... NEVER berate yourself for doing your best. Your best is the best you can do. And that happens to be whatever you do.

I enjoyed a beer in the garden around tea time. It wasn't the warmest day ever, but it wasn't bad. I think temperatures are about to take a nose dive though...

Ellie
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 24, 2020, 05:18:38 pm
Hehehe, Pammie, and you shared that pic here for the rest of the world to see  ;D ;D ;D

Just one thing I would like to say... NEVER berate yourself for doing your best. Your best is the best you can do. And that happens to be whatever you do.

I enjoyed a beer in the garden around tea time. It wasn't the warmest day ever, but it wasn't bad. I think temperatures are about to take a nose dive though...

Ellie
Sadly right re temperature and yep, i’m a naughty girl at heart. Today was a good day - my favourite thing of all - Hairdressers visit! Michelle is my hairdresser and my confidant
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200924/dba32836693d46140e7a547a62a7a922.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on September 25, 2020, 12:25:37 pm
Sadly right re temperature and yep, i’m a naughty girl at heart. Today was a good day - my favourite thing of all - Hairdressers visit! Michelle is my hairdresser and my confidant

Nice!

That's actually an experience I have never had, and I probably will never have ... although one never knows!

My mum cut my hair up until my 20s and then I took over by buzzing it.

Male pattern baldness does seem to be starting to reverse (finasteride), but I suspect it will be years or never before I have anywhere near adequate growth on the sunroof...
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 25, 2020, 01:15:26 pm
Nice!

That's actually an experience I have never had, and I probably will never have ... although one never knows!

My mum cut my hair up until my 20s and then I took over by buzzing it.

Male pattern baldness does seem to be starting to reverse (finasteride), but I suspect it will be years or never before I have anywhere near adequate growth on the sunroof...
I’m very lucky, my brothers are both folically challenged


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on September 26, 2020, 06:58:54 am
I’m very lucky, my brothers are both folically challenged

On the plus side, though, I do have a lot of fun with wigs!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on September 26, 2020, 07:29:46 am
On the plus side, though, I do have a lot of fun with wigs!

The various hairstyles and colors can be quite appealing!


Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 26, 2020, 09:49:38 am
The various hairstyles and colors can be quite appealing!


Chrissy
That’s good!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 27, 2020, 03:56:23 am
Lots of layers today to take my grandsons to footie!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200927/02d6af6555257795c4b5013118e800ea.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Ellie_Arroway on September 27, 2020, 04:39:58 am
Lots of layers today to take my grandsons to footie!

Stay safe, Pammie... the most important layer right now is the mask (assuming you can wear one without ill effects)
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 29, 2020, 03:13:19 pm
It’s a recurring theme to me (and probably boring for others) but tragedy has put my transition challenges into absolute perspective. I still have challenges, we all do of course, I still am too focussed on passing (though less so than previously) and my brothers are still not accepting really but they are all as nothing compared to the huge hole in my heart and my life.
The knowledge that I will never ever be as happy as before I lost my darling Siobhan.
The only plus is that any new challenges are immediately in perspective.
I’m home alone tonight and having a little cry,


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on September 30, 2020, 12:05:44 am
It’s a recurring theme to me (and probably boring for others) but tragedy has put my transition challenges into absolute perspective. I still have challenges, we all do of course, I still am too focussed on passing (though less so than previously) and my brothers are still not accepting really but they are all as nothing compared to the huge hole in my heart and my life.
The knowledge that I will never ever be as happy as before I lost my darling Siobhan.
The only plus is that any new challenges are immediately in perspective.
I’m home alone tonight and having a little cry,


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Pammie-

Sending you tons of hugs!  Having lost my wife and father this year, I sadly know exactly what you mean.  i think of them every day.  Sometimes I cry, sometimes I smile- and while it can never fill the hole, I know that we are just apart for a little while.

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on September 30, 2020, 03:03:54 am
As long as it stays under control its good to cry, shows you care dear . XXXXXXX and hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 30, 2020, 03:28:43 am
Pammie-

Sending you tons of hugs!  Having lost my wife and father this year, I sadly know exactly what you mean.  i think of them every day.  Sometimes I cry, sometimes I smile- and while it can never fill the hole, I know that we are just apart for a little while.

Hugs!

Caela
That’s exactly it Caela. Extra hugs. Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on September 30, 2020, 03:33:24 am
As long as it stays under control its good to cry, shows you care dear . XXXXXXX and hugs
Yes, ur so right! I went to a grief gathering last year (which was very cathartic) and bought a lovely t-shirt with the logo “don’t panic if I cry” - sums it up. Thanks to my therapist I no longer give myself a hard time when I do suddenly start crying. Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on September 30, 2020, 05:40:10 pm
Pammie just one Big HUG!!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 01, 2020, 03:59:53 am
Pammie just one Big HUG!!!!
Gratefully received! So love my hugs. This sisterhood feels really important to me xxxx
Hugs right back - i’m going for humongous!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on October 01, 2020, 09:36:26 am
That should be HUGMONGOUS !!!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 01, 2020, 03:25:30 pm
That should be HUGMONGOUS !!!!!
Hee hee - ur sooooooo right!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 01, 2020, 05:05:30 pm
Saturday is almost here and a week away with my boyfriend - I can’t wait!
A whole week away with just the two of us! Yay! Xx

Definitely feeling more upbeat today! (Partly thanks to Andy coming over at lunchtime!)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on October 01, 2020, 05:48:02 pm
Pammie-

That sounds great!  Have fun on your getaway!

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 01, 2020, 06:21:31 pm
Pammie-

That sounds great!  Have fun on your getaway!

Hugs!

Caela
Thanks Hun! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 10, 2020, 01:13:34 pm
Just home from a totally wonderful week away with my fella - had a wonderful time (and so did he!)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201010/9fa65b0b6fe6d73e5bff81d742320af2.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201010/c3c69680fb74938cb2e6ea8b3d5a9865.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201010/9d9b5f50c187b992c086a0bd70598035.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on October 11, 2020, 03:39:39 am
nice to get away, I am waiting till camper is done next year, by then it might be okay to camp out.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 11, 2020, 04:38:04 am
nice to get away, I am waiting till camper is done next year, by then it might be okay to camp out.
Hope so hun!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 11, 2020, 02:11:27 pm
Quiet night chilling post bath  - happy Sunday evening everyone xxx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201011/3ce5cbbc013252f6e0fda25991b8d085.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 14, 2020, 05:40:06 pm
Latest lockdown restrictions means i’m not going to be able to go and see my grandkids for the next 5 or 6 weeks at least, very sad and i’m feeling quite isolated again


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on October 14, 2020, 10:26:28 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on October 14, 2020, 11:21:57 pm
Latest lockdown restrictions means i’m not going to be able to go and see my grandkids for the next 5 or 6 weeks at least, very sad and i’m feeling quite isolated again


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I'm so sorry to hear that Pammie- sending lots of hugs your way.  Stay safe!

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on October 15, 2020, 06:16:38 am
Pammie we are all going to need our extra reserves of patience with this virus.  I have noticed that we are all getting very creative with this extra time, finding new hobbies and rediscovering old ones.

At least you can call and skype with your grandchildren.  A friend started a written letter exchange with his granddaughter and she feels like they have gotten closer.  Much more personal than skype.

Look what the writing here has done for us.

Warm Hug,

Emma

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 15, 2020, 10:11:18 am
Pammie we are all going to need our extra reserves of patience with this virus.  I have noticed that we are all getting very creative with this extra time, finding new hobbies and rediscovering old ones.

At least you can call and skype with your grandchildren.  A friend started a written letter exchange with his granddaughter and she feels like they have gotten closer.  Much more personal than skype.

Look what the writing here has done for us.

Warm Hug,

Emma
That’s a great point and a great idea!  Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 15, 2020, 10:12:04 am
I'm so sorry to hear that Pammie- sending lots of hugs your way.  Stay safe!

Hugs!

Caela
Thanks Caela, hugs right back! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on October 15, 2020, 04:04:00 pm
Latest lockdown restrictions means i’m not going to be able to go and see my grandkids for the next 5 or 6 weeks at least, very sad and i’m feeling quite isolated again


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


That stinks.  It is said to be for the public’s good though.  Still, being apart is hard.
Hang in there and call to talk.  :)

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 15, 2020, 04:10:50 pm

That stinks.  It is said to be for the public’s good though.  Still, being apart is hard.
Hang in there and call to talk.  :)

Chrissy
I struggle because i’m not even in a bubble - even my boyfriend will be under pressure from his brother as he cares for his 89 year old dad so that if we go up to tier 3 I might not even see him.
Trying to stay positive


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on October 15, 2020, 04:12:40 pm
I struggle because i’m not even in a bubble - even my boyfriend will be under pressure from his brother as he cares for his 89 year old dad so that if we go up to tier 3 I might not even see him.
Trying to stay positive


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


That is a good aim, to stay positive.  These are strange and trying times.

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 15, 2020, 04:21:42 pm

That is a good aim, to stay positive.  These are strange and trying times.

Chrissy
Thanks Hun - ur quite right xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 16, 2020, 04:23:39 pm

That is a good aim, to stay positive.  These are strange and trying times.

Chrissy
I actually write a journal every night and always include 3 positives from the day. 2 observations:
1. It’s sometimes a challenge to identify 3
2. Susan’s and the wonderful people on here feature often! - thank you all!! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on October 16, 2020, 04:36:57 pm
Pammie stay positive.  The virus won't last and you know that as transgender women, we are a tough group!

Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 16, 2020, 04:42:39 pm
Pammie stay positive.  The virus won't last and you know that as transgender women, we are a tough group!

Hugs,

Emma
Thanks Emma and totally agree!! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on October 16, 2020, 04:44:08 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
All of us feel the pain of not getting together with our loved one as often as we desire.  At least in this day and age of tech we can text and FaceTime... not as good as being there but seeing and talking to your grandkids can still be more enjoyable than not being with them at all.

I also completely agree with you about the friends that we make here on the Forum’s ...  it is not only that we are we all like-minded for the most part but many of the friendships here can help make up for the lockdown restrictions.

Writing in your journal is certainly a good use of your time and it can be very good personal  therapy too.
I really like the fact that in spite of hardships that you try to identify positives and write down your daily observations.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts..
Hugs, stay safe, stay healthy... and stay positive.
Danielle

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 16, 2020, 04:57:31 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
All of us feel the pain of not getting together with our loved one as often as we desire.  At least in this day and age of tech we can text and FaceTime... not as good as being there but seeing and talking to your grandkids can still be more enjoyable than not being with them at all.

I also completely agree with you about the friends that we make here on the Forum’s ...  it is not only that we are we all like-minded for the most part but many of the friendships here can help make up for the lockdown restrictions.

Writing in your journal is certainly a good use of your time and it can be very good personal  therapy too.
I really like the fact that in spite of hardships that you try to identify positives and write down your daily observations.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts..
Hugs, stay safe, stay healthy... and stay positive.
Danielle
Danielle, u r (IMHO) my number one positive influence - thank you so much xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 18, 2020, 04:30:24 pm
Sunday evening already! Spent far too much of the weekend working sadly!
On the positive side my Andy came over at lunchtime so the day was not wasted!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on October 19, 2020, 09:14:00 am
Pammie so glad that your day got better!  Happy is a better place to be!


Hugs,

Emma
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 19, 2020, 09:15:22 am
Pammie so glad that your day got better!  Happy is a better place to be!


Hugs,

Emma
Thanks Emma!
I was certainly very happy yesterday lunchtime - and so was Andy!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 22, 2020, 12:59:46 pm
So today I had my “end of assessment “ interview with GIS Leeds (Gender Identity Services) who have decreed that yes, I do indeed have gender dysphoria! Well, that’s a relief
At least i’m officially in the GIS pathway now


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on October 22, 2020, 01:34:03 pm
Congratulations.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on October 22, 2020, 02:00:43 pm
Congratulations Pammie!  It's great that the medical side is catching up for you!

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 22, 2020, 02:08:58 pm
Congratulations Pammie!  It's great that the medical side is catching up for you!

Hugs!

Caela
Thanks Caela! Xx
Ps how do you pronounce Caela ? Is it “Kay-La”?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on October 22, 2020, 02:18:23 pm
Thanks Caela! Xx
Ps how do you pronounce Caela ? Is it “Kay-La”?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
You are welcome Pammie! And yes- it's "Kay-La".

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on October 22, 2020, 02:20:12 pm
Well done dear, bit of progress.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 22, 2020, 02:20:25 pm
You are welcome Pammie! And yes- it's "Kay-La".

Hugs!

Caela
meaning slim and fair! That’s nice. I love Gaelic names - my eldest is called Siobhan xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 22, 2020, 02:20:55 pm
Well done dear, bit of progress.
Thanks Davina! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on October 22, 2020, 03:02:51 pm
So today I had my “end of assessment “ interview with GIS Leeds (Gender Identity Services) who have decreed that yes, I do indeed have gender dysphoria! Well, that’s a relief
At least i’m officially in the GIS pathway now


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Did they also tell you that they've ascertained that water is wet? ;)

*hugs*

Here's to the future. ^_^
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 22, 2020, 03:42:39 pm
Did they also tell you that they've ascertained that water is wet? ;)

*hugs*

Here's to the future. ^_^
Hee hee! Indeed


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 23, 2020, 11:12:37 am
In the way of the rollercoaster world that is our trans existence I had a definite down experience today. My boyfriend and i were walking back to my car when this young guy who had just walked past us turned around looked at me and became very very nasty. Obviously not a passing day today. It left me really shaken and quite tearful. Andy didn’t have much chance to say anything as the guy then walked on before turning around again and shouting more insults. I think he was on drugs too so it was really bad.
Feeling very very down now. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on October 23, 2020, 11:58:46 am
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on October 23, 2020, 01:21:51 pm
@Pammie

I'm so sorry Pammie!  That sounds like it was really intense!  Sending you lots of hugs, and hope the rest of the day with your boyfriend went fine.

Hugs!

Caela

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: SarahEL on October 23, 2020, 03:23:51 pm
So sorry you experienced that Pammie.. They are just idiots.. Don't let a loser damage your confidence. They really are not worth it..
Sending you a hug {{{{{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on October 23, 2020, 04:10:59 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:   
Very unfortunately enduring insults is kind of a norm for all that are transitioning and also for those that are fully transitioned.   People can be cruel and can be more cruel if drunk, on drugs, or in a group.

You have posted so very many stories and examples of your ability to pass.... please have NO self-doubts.

We all can have a bad day....  time to pamper yourself.  Beauty Salon, dinner date, think positive.   
Here on the forums we all are very understanding about these thing... we are rooting for you always.
HUGS, and more Hugs 
Danielle


Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 23, 2020, 04:18:39 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:   
Very unfortunately enduring insults is kind of a norm for all that are transitioning and also for those that are fully transitioned.   People can be cruel and can be more cruel if drunk, on drugs, or in a group.

You have posted so very many stories and examples of your ability to pass.... please have NO self-doubts.

We all can have a bad day....  time to pamper yourself.  Beauty Salon, dinner date, think positive.   
Here on the forums we all are very understanding about these thing... we are rooting for you always.
HUGS, and more Hugs 
Danielle
Thank you so much!
I’ve gone to my go-to formula when i’m upset.
Bath then white wine, chocolate and mama Mia dvd! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 23, 2020, 04:42:42 pm
So sorry you experienced that Pammie.. They are just idiots.. Don't let a loser damage your confidence. They really are not worth it..
Sending you a hug {{{{{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}}}}
I so love my hugs - thanks Hun xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 23, 2020, 04:43:25 pm
@Pammie

I'm so sorry Pammie!  That sounds like it was really intense!  Sending you lots of hugs, and hope the rest of the day with your boyfriend went fine.

Hugs!

Caela
Thanks Caela xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 23, 2020, 04:43:42 pm
Hugs
Love my hugs xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Oldandcreaky on October 24, 2020, 10:47:56 am
Pammie, I am so sad that that happened to you. I know how much passing matters to you. It matters to me too. I'm about your age and like many old women, I've accepted my fate as the invisible generation, for women are seen less and less as we age. I wear clothing so muted and earthy that I draw as much attention as a leaf blowing down the street. You have transitioned recently, so you are playing with color and shape as I did in my twenties and as many young women do. You want your turn at fashion fun and I understand that.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 24, 2020, 10:51:23 am
Pammie, I am so sad that that happened to you. I know how much passing matters to you. It matters to me too. I'm about your age and like many old women, I've accepted my fate as the invisible generation, for women are seen less and less as we age. I wear clothing so muted and earthy that I draw as much attention as a leaf blowing down the street. You have transitioned recently, so you are playing with color and shape as I did in my twenties and as many young women do. You want your turn at fashion fun and I understand that.
Thanks Hun. I certainly am not ready for the old woman tag! 60 is just a fact not a driver


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 24, 2020, 01:13:19 pm
Felt the need to reassure myself today so tried a few different outfits on
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201024/d159b79bfec70a0a704d5b3c8b6be4e7.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201024/344ed181c04546e12c5afc148590c225.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201024/613e245d16f502374e4c31a2a520a34d.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on October 24, 2020, 01:37:21 pm
Felt the need to reassure myself today so tried a few different outfits on
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201024/d159b79bfec70a0a704d5b3c8b6be4e7.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201024/344ed181c04546e12c5afc148590c225.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201024/613e245d16f502374e4c31a2a520a34d.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Pammie, you are gorgeous.

That's it. You are beautiful, okay?

Forget people who are going through their own issues to the point they feel like it's okay to be nasty to someone else.

You are a truly beautiful person, inside and out. And anyone who's listened to what you've had to say for literally more than five seconds will see that. Beauty starts from who we are inside, and radiates outwards. People can be supermodels but still be hateful and ugly and nasty. THIS is how you gauge how someone is. Not from seeing someone on the street for a few seconds.

This guy was probably going through all sorts of stuff and decided it was best to take it out on you, because they had no other outlet. That's what bullies do. Since like the dawn of time.

I am sorry it made you feel the way it did but... from listening to you, seeing you... ALL of you.. Pammie, you are truly beautiful and no one can ever take that away from you, okay? These vagrant encounters... they mean nothing. You will likely never see that person again. You're being honest to yourself, you're being true to yourself, you're.... living your life the way you want to live it. That is not something most people can lay claim to, honestly. It makes you shine. Inside and out.

You. Are. Beautiful. Because you're you. Never forget that. <3
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 24, 2020, 02:13:20 pm
Pammie, you are gorgeous.

That's it. You are beautiful, okay?

Forget people who are going through their own issues to the point they feel like it's okay to be nasty to someone else.

You are a truly beautiful person, inside and out. And anyone who's listened to what you've had to say for literally more than five seconds will see that. Beauty starts from who we are inside, and radiates outwards. People can be supermodels but still be hateful and ugly and nasty. THIS is how you gauge how someone is. Not from seeing someone on the street for a few seconds.

This guy was probably going through all sorts of stuff and decided it was best to take it out on you, because they had no other outlet. That's what bullies do. Since like the dawn of time.

I am sorry it made you feel the way it did but... from listening to you, seeing you... ALL of you.. Pammie, you are truly beautiful and no one can ever take that away from you, okay? These vagrant encounters... they mean nothing. You will likely never see that person again. You're being honest to yourself, you're being true to yourself, you're.... living your life the way you want to live it. That is not something most people can lay claim to, honestly. It makes you shine. Inside and out.

You. Are. Beautiful. Because you're you. Never forget that. <3
Oh Sephirah, you are truly the nicest of people. You make me feel so much better (not to  mention a tear or 2!j
Thank you so much. I’m having a pampering evening and thoroughly enjoying it! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Sephirah on October 24, 2020, 02:24:42 pm
Oh Sephirah, you are truly the nicest of people. You make me feel so much better (not to  mention a tear or 2!j
Thank you so much. I’m having a pampering evening and thoroughly enjoying it! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

You deserve it, sweetie.

Forget people who are so eaten up with hate and nastiness that the only thing they can do is take it out on others. Feel sorry for them. That's all they will ever have. I'm just telling it like I see it. The most genuine people are those who accept who they are, and embrace it. I hate seeing caring, gentle, sweet people being made to feel bad just because someone else is having a bad day. Because it's likely all they know, and all they know how to be.

Karma is a thing. It will come back to all of us in the end. Be the best person you can be. Be you. Don't hate on others just because you don't feel the same way they do. Or see something the same way they do. Just be you. Live your life. Be supportive to others. Be the best person you can be. Pammie, you are that person. Leave the hate for others... it will come back to haunt them. Trust me. It always does. Hate is something that only makes you end up feeling worse. Not other people. I've been there.

Keep being you, sweetie, because you're awesome. *megahugs*

And you're beautiful. You are. Don't ever forget that. <3
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 24, 2020, 02:28:04 pm
You deserve it, sweetie.

Forget people who are so eaten up with hate and nastiness that the only thing they can do is take it out on others. Feel sorry for them. That's all they will ever have. I'm just telling it like I see it. The most genuine people are those who accept who they are, and embrace it. I hate seeing caring, gentle, sweet people being made to feel bad just because someone else is having a bad day. Because it's likely all they know, and all they know how to be.

Karma is a thing. It will come back to all of us in the end. Be the best person you can be. Be you. Don't hate on others just because you don't feel the same way they do. Or see something the same way they do. Just be you. Live your life. Be supportive to others. Be the best person you can be. Pammie, you are that person. Leave the hate for others... it will come back to haunt them. Trust me. It always does. Hate is something that only makes you end up feeling worse. Not other people. I've been there.

Keep being you, sweetie, because you're awesome. *megahugs*

And you're beautiful. You are. Don't ever forget that. <3
You know you really are inspiring! You are also spot on, i can and will move past this. I do try to be the best Pammie I can be


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Wendi on October 24, 2020, 11:23:55 pm
It's sad that people have to be so mean. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 25, 2020, 03:09:26 pm
It's sad that people have to be so mean. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk
Thanks Wendi. I’ve thought about this a lot since it happened and have realised that the problem with evolution is I have become less hardened, thinner skinned. 3 or even 2 years ago I anticipated comments and was hardened to them. The problem is i’m so comfortable in my own skin and pass so much of the time that I’d stopped worrying.
Of course there are many on here who are so comfortable in their own skin that they will never worry about passing because they are just being themselves - but that’s just not me


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 25, 2020, 03:21:40 pm
I’m a but disappointed in myself this weekend. There are many people in here who are just themselves and do not need societal validation but i’m just not one of those people.
Ah well, c’est la vie
An hour with my Andy helped today but it’s still been a struggle sadly  - casual day too
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201025/879dc1cabdbbeedbfc141862121c7de2.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: SarahEL on October 25, 2020, 04:17:01 pm
I personally believe you pass very easily Pammie..  There is no need to feel disappointed in yourself..

It happens to us all I think ..  Today, getting a coffee from a drive-thru, the guy asked me all cheerily, 'You okay mate!'..  I glared at him a little and he looked a bit sheepish..
I got quite annoyed after we left, but my daughter calmed me down saying 'he probably calls everyone mate', and other things about how well I pass.... Still, it unsettled me a little, I don't think I was expecting it just then....
So, I just try not to let it get to me...It is hard sometimes though. I know it hurts..
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 25, 2020, 04:51:51 pm
I personally believe you pass very easily Pammie..  There is no need to feel disappointed in yourself..

It happens to us all I think ..  Today, getting a coffee from a drive-thru, the guy asked me all cheerily, 'You okay mate!'..  I glared at him a little and he looked a bit sheepish..
I got quite annoyed after we left, but my daughter calmed me down saying 'he probably calls everyone mate', and other things about how well I pass.... Still, it unsettled me a little, I don't think I was expecting it just then....
So, I just try not to let it get to me...It is hard sometimes though. I know it hurts..
Exactly Sarah! Some people do use mate for everyone and it’s very very disconcerting!
Yes, I just don’t seem to avoid it getting to me - silly Pammie!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on October 25, 2020, 08:34:53 pm
Pammie-

You look great in all your pictures!  I agree with @SarahEL- to me you pass very well.  I know exactly how you feel about the societal validation- my confidence was really kickstarted by being treated as a girl when I didn't know what I was doing- and it makes it that much more of a sting when I'm clocked trying my best.  I try not to let it ruin my fun- but it still hurts!

Big Hugs!!!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 26, 2020, 10:14:32 am
Pammie-

You look great in all your pictures!  I agree with @SarahEL- to me you pass very well.  I know exactly how you feel about the societal validation- my confidence was really kickstarted by being treated as a girl when I didn't know what I was doing- and it makes it that much more of a sting when I'm clocked trying my best.  I try not to let it ruin my fun- but it still hurts!

Big Hugs!!!

Caela
Thanks as always hun! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 26, 2020, 05:14:37 pm
Monday morning and still feeling unsettled by the weekend - I need to re-grow my hard shell that I had 3 years ago. We are what we are and I just can’t stop needing to pass  - nobody is perfect
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201026/fdd87f42c83e675adaed1755e6450fda.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Wendi on October 26, 2020, 05:43:42 pm
Pammie, You very much do pass. I wish I passed like you do.

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 27, 2020, 06:11:00 pm
Pammie, You very much do pass. I wish I passed like you do.

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk
That’s so kind of you Hun. Life is an  evolution and i’m sure you also will pass consistently xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 31, 2020, 03:06:02 pm
Thank goodness there are no rules about just how many times a girl can watch the Mama Mia films!
Actually recently bought new dvds because the others were starting to stick due to being played so often!
Tonight I have my memory corner candles lit and the box of tissues ready - again!
Im in such a weepy mood currently xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on October 31, 2020, 03:45:07 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on October 31, 2020, 03:58:33 pm
Hugs
Thanks as always hun! Love my hugs


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 01, 2020, 10:45:55 am
Today I delivered shopping to my younger daughters house (she’s recovering from COVID), met up with my fella and then went back home and put my Xmas tree up!
Oh and then I baked some mince pies!
Starting Xmas early because my beautiful little girl Siobhan so loved Xmas so I celebrate early and long in her memory
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201101/b06d85099413da55e957a97bd5644ee8.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201101/1cc9cb9996b8d08e06a37645caf4724a.jpg)
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201101/66ccb1f3a320c3e1bc1c5ca2c02e8f42.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on November 01, 2020, 11:48:37 am
So did you get 2 advent calendars!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 01, 2020, 11:55:06 am
So did you get 2 advent calendars!!!
Ooh good point! Im liking that idea!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Wendi on November 01, 2020, 11:56:43 am
Those pies look delicious and your tree is beautiful!

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 01, 2020, 11:57:21 am
Those pies look delicious and your tree is beautiful!

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk
Awww thanks Wendi! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on November 01, 2020, 03:20:32 pm
What a wonderful tribute Pammie!  My wife loved Christmas too,  and I'm already thinking of wrapping up my early shopping presents for under the tree too!

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 01, 2020, 03:23:33 pm
What a wonderful tribute Pammie!  My wife loved Christmas too,  and I'm already thinking of wrapping up my early shopping presents for under the tree too!

Hugs!

Caela
Good for you Caela - hugs right back xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 02, 2020, 05:08:08 pm
Tonight I logged into another online grief gathering (it’s a wonderful idea  - pulling together a disparate group of people United only by grief. It’s so cathartic to talk about my beautiful Siobhan and how wonderful she was and the chasm in my heart. It’s fine to cry when I need to which is often.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201102/b4495864e594781ea2ac82e6996d8e5f.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on November 02, 2020, 05:40:56 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 03, 2020, 03:18:14 am
Hugs
As always, thank you so much - love my hugs xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on November 03, 2020, 08:53:09 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:

Many HUGS, all the time!!!!
Danielle


Tonight I logged into another online grief gathering (it’s a wonderful idea  - pulling together a disparate group of people United only by grief. It’s so cathartic to talk about my beautiful Siobhan and how wonderful she was and the chasm in my heart. It’s fine to cry when I need to which is often.
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201102/b4495864e594781ea2ac82e6996d8e5f.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 03, 2020, 09:01:18 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:

Many HUGS, all the time!!!!
Danielle

Thanks hun! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 05, 2020, 01:23:55 pm
Lockdown 2 started today and I managed to get out 3 times for a run, a walk and a shopping expedition (chocolate, wine and croissants!) - feeling ready for it this time! All hugs welcome though as im Also feeling a little isolated xx
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201105/77d9bce89614bc2465a635cfa040bcab.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on November 05, 2020, 02:08:46 pm
Hugs Pammie!! - I know how hard lockdown is, but please stay safe, stay healthy!  (And I love that sweater! Definitely sweater weather over here on this side of the world!)

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on November 05, 2020, 02:50:11 pm
Huge hug from me dear, nothing changing for me just same old working on hot rod and food shopping when needed!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 05, 2020, 02:54:12 pm
Hugs Pammie!! - I know how hard lockdown is, but please stay safe, stay healthy!  (And I love that sweater! Definitely sweater weather over here on this side of the world!)

Hugs!

Caela
Thank you so much Cae!
Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 05, 2020, 02:54:27 pm
Huge hug from me dear, nothing changing for me just same old working on hot rod and food shopping when needed!!
Thanks sweetie xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 05, 2020, 02:55:56 pm
Just been listening to the song my Andy wrote and sang for me - gosh, i’m a lucky girl!

https://www.soundcorset.com/r/-o4QS9VHnl/
shared via Soundcorset.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on November 05, 2020, 03:09:18 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 05, 2020, 03:17:47 pm
Hugs
Thanks hun! Hugs right back! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Wendi on November 07, 2020, 08:42:45 am
Just been listening to the song my Andy wrote and sang for me - gosh, i’m a lucky girl!

https://www.soundcorset.com/r/-o4QS9VHnl/
shared via Soundcorset.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
He's really good. I love that.

Hugs

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 07, 2020, 08:49:37 am
He's really good. I love that.

Hugs

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk
Awww thank you - I found it so romantic when he wrote and sang that for me. He earned sooooooooo many brownie points


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 07, 2020, 04:04:27 pm
So, my isolation diary - day 3
Saturday so no alarm, woke up at 8 then went out for my run and it was 10 by the time I was showered, dressed and eating breakfast.
After some housework I went for a walk then came home and did some baking. Baked sausage rolls, mince pies and Bakewell tart. Watched some tv, did some course work then went for another walk.
Evening started with kettlebell and bum exercises then made tea snd then had a long bath.
Now watching “it’s a wonderful life”, eating chocolate and drinking wine !
It’s a solitary life though I have talked to Andy for half an hour (and exchanged about 100 texts) and talked to my little bruv for an hour.
 (https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201107/9844d8084148a7c64d8627c8775d6f36.jpg)


(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201107/7236c8dd6b4a61bd02f3f1469576341c.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on November 07, 2020, 04:15:35 pm
Tell me Pam, worked on my hot rod till I got to cold (3.30ish) had a shower ,washed up and tried to find something to watch on box. Want to watch some stuff on catch up but my internet is so slow it just scrolls , had some tea then watched Strictly and now Atomic Blonde . Try not to cook to many goodies as I end up eating them all myself-------
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 07, 2020, 04:29:04 pm
Tell me Pam, worked on my hot rod till I got to cold (3.30ish) had a shower ,washed up and tried to find something to watch on box. Want to watch some stuff on catch up but my internet is so slow it just scrolls , had some tea then watched Strictly and now Atomic Blonde . Try not to cook to many goodies as I end up eating them all myself-------
I know that feeling hun!
Can’t wait to see your finished hot rod!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 08, 2020, 01:29:58 pm
My isolation diary - day 4
Well, it’s Sunday so sleep in, no run and croissants, coffee and orange juice for breakfast so good start!
Spent the whole morning culling my wardrobes snd drawers, some stuff I never wear us off to charity shops and all summer stuff is now stored in storage bags under the beds. Wow, I have wardrobe space (not much though!)
Drove the 17 miles to Bolton at lunchtime to see Andy (but only got to see him for 30 mins) which is the only contact time I get (it’s better when he comes here - then we have much better quality “contact”)
Quiet day since, watching some tv and doing some housework. We have set up our family secret Santa (I started it last year in memory of my beautiful daughter Siobhan)
Now chilling post kettlebell exercises and contemplating a glass of wine
 
 

 
 
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201108/2e9486a1d478539e3521584f4e775ece.jpg)
 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on November 08, 2020, 03:46:30 pm
Sounds like a wonderful day!!! It definitely is time for a glass of wine. I just read a T-shirt that said “Wine: holding 2020 together!”  Enjoy!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 08, 2020, 03:56:56 pm
Sounds like a wonderful day!!! It definitely is time for a glass of wine. I just read a T-shirt that said “Wine: holding 2020 together!”  Enjoy!
Thanks hun! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on November 08, 2020, 04:06:41 pm
I just poured my self a glass, Pammie so I hope you have one!  Everyone of us should should spoil ourselves!  We absolutely deserve it.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 09, 2020, 11:53:53 am
I just poured my self a glass, Pammie so I hope you have one!  Everyone of us should should spoil ourselves!  We absolutely deserve it.
Thanks hun, wine very much on the agenda! xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on November 09, 2020, 02:34:24 pm
I would join in but cellars empty!!!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 09, 2020, 02:45:26 pm
I would join in but cellars empty!!!
Oh no!! Sending virtual wine!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 09, 2020, 04:43:59 pm
My isolation diary -  day 5
“Tell me why I don’t like Monday’s “ - oh yes I remember why!
Wasn’t a fantastic weekend and felt very lonely last night.
But started the day well enough with my morning run and work was ok initially. My poor Andy is having a tough time at the moment with his 89 year old dad’s health failing. It means we don’t have much chance to meet up.
Managed a lunchtime and evening walk which was good then also did my kettlebell exercises so felt virtuous until I got the wine and chocolate out then sadly negated all those calories I had burned!
Great news re vaccine though!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201109/59c1ae6518e81c0032d84996026f668b.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 10, 2020, 02:10:34 pm
My isolation diary - day 6
I didn’t sleep well as I was a bit down last night. Im a social animal and I miss interacting.
Sometimes at night my mind takes me to the memory bank snd I think of my Siobhan then I really don’t sleep and stay sad.
Sometimes my lunchtime walk and a phone conversation with my Andy are enough to make me smile again but not really today. I feel very alone at the moment.
I dress for work, I do my make-up and like the way I look but then the day is just video conferencing. It feels like life is so artificial.
 
 
 
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201110/ed882aa89b372b08e56e346606558daa.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on November 10, 2020, 02:36:22 pm
My isolation diary - day 6
I didn’t sleep well as I was a bit down last night. Im a social animal and I miss interacting.
Sometimes at night my mind takes me to the memory bank snd I think of my Siobhan then I really don’t sleep and stay sad.
Sometimes my lunchtime walk and a phone conversation with my Andy are enough to make me smile again but not really today. I feel very alone at the moment.
I dress for work, I do my make-up and like the way I look but then the day is just video conferencing. It feels like life is so artificial.
 
 
 
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201110/ed882aa89b372b08e56e346606558daa.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Big hugs Pammie- Even on a day like today where everything could be sad, the lesson I learned from my wife is that life is beautiful. I will always have and cherish her love.  It's very hard sometimes, and it can never fill the hole- but it's enough to get me through the tough days.  Be strong dear!

Hugs!

Caela 
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 10, 2020, 02:38:24 pm
Big hugs Pammie- Even on a day like today where everything could be sad, the lesson I learned from my wife is that life is beautiful. I will always have and cherish her love.  It's very hard sometimes, and it can never fill the hole- but it's enough to get me through the tough days.  Be strong dear!

Hugs!

Caela
Thanks Cae, ur right, and I do need to stop feeling sorry for myself. Hugs for you too. Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on November 10, 2020, 04:21:37 pm
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on November 10, 2020, 04:53:25 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
Losses of loved ones as you experienced are going to stick with you all of your life....
.... make peace with yourself and recount your fond memories that no one can take away.

Today is a new day... new joys and happiness await you.
Tight and loving HUGS for you from me.....

                        (https://i.imgur.com/kFTwOf1.jpg) 
Blessings to you,
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 11, 2020, 04:03:21 pm
My isolation diary - day 7
Trying to get back to my positive thinking but it’s a challenge.
Wednesday’s are a real physical challenge as I had my first meeting at 7:30am which meant getting up at 5:15 for my run then finished work at 17:15 just had enough time to do my kettlebell exercises before my Wednesday Data Science course from 18:30 to 21:30.
Shattered now but enjoyed the course and learning python programming (6th programming language I’ve learned over the years) .
Sitting now and contemplating my memory corner to remind myself of 2 things:
1. Today’s challenges are nothing compared to the ever-present fact of my little girl being gone snd
2. I’d better get on with life because Siobhan would kick my butt for feeling sorry for myself!

Time to get on with life, to make her proud and to be the best me I can be!
Hugs to everyone ! Xxx
 
 
 
 
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201111/d860b2681f93b4f41a430b39c139c6b6.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on November 11, 2020, 04:40:30 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I am so very happy to read your update today....

Regular exercise is not only good for your physical body but it also clears your mind so you can better think clearly regarding your classes, your tasks today, and to ponder your life events and to take positive actions.

I love your final sentence.... 
 "Time to get on with life, to make her proud and to be the best me I can be!"

Continue to think positive and do positive things.

HUGS, and as always I am wishing you well.

Danielle

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 11, 2020, 04:58:56 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
I am so very happy to read your update today....

Regular exercise is not only good for your physical body but it also clears your mind so you can better think clearly regarding your classes, your tasks today, and to ponder your life events and to take positive actions.

I love your final sentence.... 
 "Time to get on with life, to make her proud and to be the best me I can be!"

Continue to think positive and do positive things.

HUGS, and as always I am wishing you well.

Danielle
Thanks so much hun xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on November 12, 2020, 05:04:22 pm
Thanks so much hun xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
@Pammie
Dear Pammie:
In spite of the difficulties that life throws at you please try to stay positive.

click Link --->   Positive Mindset... put away negativity (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,238255.0.html)

HUGS and wishing you happiness....
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 14, 2020, 08:46:42 pm
My isolation diary - day 10
I can’t sleep tonight and my thoughts inevitably turn to my beautiful little girl Siobhan

I call this “Remember......l

Remember when you were born and
Your fingers curled around my thumb?
When you wrapped yourself around my heart
And changed my world forever.

Remember when I held you in my arms
And felt the rapture of my love for you!
When your ever-present smile always made me smile,
And my heart about burst with sheer joy?

Remember when the sound of your laughter
Brought laughter to my lips,
When your first stuttering steps
Were the source of overwhelming joy?

Remember when I took you to the beach
And we played and laughed and I saw the joy in your face?
When I learned every day just how amazing it was,
To be a parent and to have such a beautiful little girl?

Remember when you played with your little brother Antony,
And looked after him when he fell?
When I always relied on you
To tell me when he was doing something mad?

Remember when I took you first to school
And felt so proud and happy at how you looked?
When you charmed your teachers every day
And made your schoolmates laugh!

Remember when it was time for big school
And you took it all in your stride?
When all the reports talked of just
How social, sweet and funny you were?

Remember when you held
Your new little brother Jack in your arms?
And bonded and loved him and reminded me
Just how wonderful you were?

Remember when you repeated that with Grace
And how you were just the bestest big sister of all?
When your beautiful smile just kept filling me with joy
And how I always felt the joy and pride
Of all the love in my heart?

Remember when you first met Dave
And I felt the missing jigsaw piece in your life was found?
When you found true love and
I saw it in your eyes?

Remember when I walked you down the aisle
And you looked oh so beautiful and I so proud?
When you started your new life and I had
To let you go just a little?

Remember when Jake was born and how at last
Your true calling as a wonderful mum began!
When you were filled with such joy
And I basked in my own happiness as I looked on?

Remember when your little Sam was born
And your 2 little boys were the luckiest alive?
When your goal was always to fill their lives with joy
And you were selfless in your love for them?

Remember when we shared so many fun times at centre parcs
And did so many things but always found time for coffee?
When I always wanted a little me and you time
Amidst the madness of our family fun?

Remember the last time I ever saw you
And my final words “love you”?
I remember the chasm of my despair
When Dave told me you had gone,

I’ll always remember all the wonderful things
And all the wonder you gave me in too short a time
When I smiled and laughed and cried with joy
When you wrapped yourself around my heart......


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Northern Star Girl on November 14, 2020, 10:18:12 pm
@Pammie
Dear Pammie
I have gone through a half-box of tissues and wiping the tears from my
eyes reading your last post "My isolation diary - day 10"

My heart hurts for you....
I love your tender heart and how you expressed your heartfelt expressions of
your love and of the sorrow of your loss regarding your daughter Siobhan.

Blessings to you, my prayers and hope go out to you.   God can provide the
comforting healing power for your mind and for your memories,


HUGS and best wishes....
Danielle
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: TSL_NB on November 15, 2020, 12:57:59 am
Pammie, please know I'm thinking about you, too.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 15, 2020, 02:11:55 am
@Pammie
Dear Pammie
I have gone through a half-box of tissues and wiping the tears from my
eyes reading your last post "My isolation diary - day 10"

My heart hurts for you....
I love your tender heart and how you expressed your heartfelt expressions of
your love and of the sorrow of your loss regarding your daughter Siobhan.

Blessings to you, my prayers and hope go out to you.   God can provide the
comforting healing power for your mind and for your memories,


HUGS and best wishes....
Danielle

Sweet Danielle, ur empathy and kindness are awesome and I so appreciate your love and support. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 15, 2020, 02:12:30 am
Pammie, please know I'm thinking about you, too.
Thank you hunny. That’s so lovely to hear. Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on November 15, 2020, 03:25:26 am
Big HUGS Pam, look after your self dear XXXXX
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 15, 2020, 04:49:15 am
Big HUGS Pam, look after your self dear XXXXX
Thank you. Just having a “grief tsunami “ morning


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on November 15, 2020, 09:08:28 am
Pammie-

Big Hugs dear!  Your poem to your daughter brought tears to my eyes for your broken heart after reading it.  I'm sure she's looking down and smiling at your touching tribute.  Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 15, 2020, 09:27:17 am
Pammie-

Big Hugs dear!  Your poem to your daughter brought tears to my eyes for your broken heart after reading it.  I'm sure she's looking down and smiling at your touching tribute.  Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!

Hugs!

Caela
Thank you so much Caela.  Hugs for you too xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Julie H on November 15, 2020, 09:52:09 am
Hugs
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 15, 2020, 09:53:15 am
Hugs
Thanks Julie, you know how much I love my hugs! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on November 15, 2020, 10:00:44 am
Pammie my heart is so with you. 

It has been four years since I lost my son to leukemia.  He was 18 when he was diagnosed and he battled it for four years.  I think about him every day.  I miss him but I am always thankful that, as brief as his life was and regardless of the pain his loss has caused me, I always smile when I think of the incredible joy his time with us gave me.

I refuse to let the pain rob me of that amazing joy.

I hope that you can find your peace in the love she gave you and that the joy you both shared lifts the pain of her loss from your heart.


Sincerely,

Emma

 
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 15, 2020, 10:10:51 am
Pammie my heart is so with you. 

It has been four years since I lost my son to leukemia.  He was 18 when he was diagnosed and he battled it for four years.  I think about him every day.  I miss him but I am always thankful that, as brief as his life was and regardless of the pain his loss has caused me, I always smile when I think of the incredible joy his time with us gave me.

I refuse to let the pain rob me of that amazing joy.

I hope that you can find your peace in the love she gave you and that the joy you both shared lifts the pain of her loss from your heart.


Sincerely,

Emma
Thank you Emma! I always hope to not find too many people who know the agony of losing a child and my heart goes out to you. I imagine you have times like im having today and we both will do forever.
On most days I do rejoice in the amazing and wonderful memories of my Siobhan but some days the pain is too great to bear.
Tomorrow will be a new day and I’ll almost certainly be able to reset - at least for a while. Sending you lots of hugs. Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Emma1017 on November 15, 2020, 10:20:46 am
The best we can do for our children, Pammie, is to rejoice in the life that we still have.

Massive hug,

Emma

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 15, 2020, 10:50:36 am
The best we can do for our children, Pammie, is to rejoice in the life that we still have.

Massive hug,

Emma
Beautifully put xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 15, 2020, 02:20:44 pm
My isolation diary - day 11
The day started very early as I didn’t really get any sleep last night . I’ve just been in a tough place for days.
Not seeing much of Andy at the moment isn’t helping and not sleeping makes it hard to get out of this down phase.
I’m trying hard to shake it off but sitting with my photo album and crying doesn’t help.
From bitter experience I know that it’s not as easy as just telling myself to snap out of it -  what I need to do is switch my phone off, go to bed with a sleeping tablet and see how I am tomorrow. Nite nite all xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on November 15, 2020, 04:17:57 pm
Sweet dreams dear, hope its a peaceful one .
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 16, 2020, 02:56:35 am
Sweet dreams dear, hope its a peaceful one .
Thanks hun! Im feeling a bit less out of alignment today. Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on November 16, 2020, 03:02:51 am
Thanks hun! Im feeling a bit less out of alignment today. Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Really glad to hear that today is treating you better Pammie!

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 16, 2020, 03:20:59 am
Really glad to hear that today is treating you better Pammie!

Hugs!

Caela
Thank you as always hun! Xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 17, 2020, 05:27:21 pm
My isolation diary - day 13
Still not able to see Andy as his dad just isn’t well, feeling very isolated.
Tonight though I went to see my younger daughter Grace and we had a take-away curry and watched a film and discussed my dress sense (a very usual topic). Felt so much better for that.
 
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201117/168ed43aa5971ad7c56c6c72b5b48f96.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on November 17, 2020, 07:37:54 pm
My isolation diary - day 13
Still not able to see Andy as his dad just isn’t well, feeling very isolated.
Tonight though I went to see my younger daughter Grace and we had a take-away curry and watched a film and discussed my dress sense (a very usual topic). Felt so much better for that.
 
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201117/168ed43aa5971ad7c56c6c72b5b48f96.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Nice dress Pammie!  It's great to have a daughter you can share things with- I still remember fondly doing each other's nails on our last stay at home shutdown (and we have another partial shutdown for four weeks starting at midnight local time!)

Hugs!

Caela

Hugs!
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 18, 2020, 05:08:43 pm
Nice dress Pammie!  It's great to have a daughter you can share things with- I still remember fondly doing each other's nails on our last stay at home shutdown (and we have another partial shutdown for four weeks starting at midnight local time!)

Hugs!

Caela

Hugs!
Awww that’s such a wonderfully together thing to do with your daughter Caela!
Thanks and sending some return hugs xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: barbie on November 19, 2020, 12:28:21 pm
An old saying here is "Parents are buried in the ground, children are buried in the heart."

barbie~~
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 19, 2020, 02:13:45 pm
An old saying here is "Parents are buried in the ground, children are buried in the heart."

barbie~~
You know that is such an absolutely true saying!
My Siobhan will always be in my heart


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 19, 2020, 05:04:18 pm
My isolation diary - day 15
I spent the evening (post workout) drinking wine, eating chocolate and watching “Love Actually” - as always I cried at the happy endings but they were happy tears for once


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: TSL_NB on November 19, 2020, 08:33:49 pm
@Pammie, I can relate much better to the happy tears now. :)
It's really good to be able to have that.

(Oh, and your fashion sense is on point! :)   )
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on November 20, 2020, 02:19:54 am
My isolation diary - day 15
I spent the evening (post workout) drinking wine, eating chocolate and watching “Love Actually” - as always I cried at the happy endings but they were happy tears for once


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
@Pammie

Pammie- good for you dear! It's a good place to have happy tears! 

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 20, 2020, 05:39:14 am
@Pammie, I can relate much better to the happy tears now. :)
It's really good to be able to have that.

(Oh, and your fashion sense is on point! :)   )
Thanks so much hun! Happy tears are nice. I am an emotional cow im afraid


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 20, 2020, 05:39:54 am
@Pammie

Pammie- good for you dear! It's a good place to have happy tears! 

Hugs!

Caela
Thanks hun, love my hugs! Sending you some too! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: barbie on November 20, 2020, 09:22:16 am
You know that is such an absolutely true saying!
My Siobhan will always be in my heart

My grandparents had 9 siblings, but 7 passed away before them at the ages ranging from teen to the early 40s. It was such a difficult time, and I still can not figure out how my grandparents could endure so many losses. My grandfather grasped my hands, looking at me with wet eyes, just before he passed away when I was 14 years old. He loved me the most among his grandchildren because I was the first one.

I have 3 children. The youngest one is a teenage daughter who always nags me. The eldest son is now on a 3-day trip to Seoul. The second son is in the army, which is obligatory here. Just ago I chatted with him on the phone.

barbie~~
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 20, 2020, 02:16:20 pm
My grandparents had 9 siblings, but 7 passed away before them at the ages ranging from teen to the early 40s. It was such a difficult time, and I still can not figure out how my grandparents could endure so many losses. My grandfather grasped my hands, looking at me with wet eyes, just before he passed away when I was 14 years old. He loved me the most among his grandchildren because I was the first one.

I have 3 children. The youngest one is a teenage daughter who always nags me. The eldest son is now on a 3-day trip to Seoul. The second son is in the army, which is obligatory here. Just ago I chatted with him on the phone.

barbie~~
It’s so nice to hear that you are so close to your children. I  try to stay close to my 3 surviving children and im so grateful how accepting they are generally. Siobhan had left me with a hugs hole in my heart and I cannot even begin to imagine anything happening to one of the other three.
Im so paranoid now. Your grandparents must have endured so much pain - I am in awe that they found the strength to go on!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 20, 2020, 03:26:47 pm
My isolation diary - day 16
And today being Trans Day of remembrance it’s appropriate to put aside my own trials, tribulations and successes and just say a heartfelt thank you to those who gave their lives in the name of being trans
- their sacrifice improves our life and i for one am truly humbled xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Wendi on November 20, 2020, 06:40:39 pm
My isolation diary - day 16
And today being Trans Day of remembrance it’s appropriate to put aside my own trials, tribulations and successes and just say a heartfelt thank you to those who gave their lives in the name of being trans
- their sacrifice improves our life and i for one am truly humbled xxx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Well said Pammie.

Hugs

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 21, 2020, 02:51:19 pm
Tonight im continuing my Xmas film vigil - tonight it’s “Scrooged” - wine, chocolate and Xmas film
Post bath chilling
 
 
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201121/ac02327d1c0920a05482bcf69a1a875a.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: davina61 on November 21, 2020, 03:34:34 pm
Well I watched Strictly with a bottle of alcoholic Ginger beer and home made pork scratchings, this girl knows how to have a good time!!!!! (chocolate is under lock till crimbo)
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 21, 2020, 03:36:13 pm
Well I watched Strictly with a bottle of alcoholic Ginger beer and home made pork scratchings, this girl knows how to have a good time!!!!! (chocolate is under lock till crimbo)
Hee hee! Fair enough! Xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: CaelaNotKayla on November 22, 2020, 01:36:21 am
Tonight im continuing my Xmas film vigil - tonight it’s “Scrooged” - wine, chocolate and Xmas film
Post bath chilling
 
 
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201121/ac02327d1c0920a05482bcf69a1a875a.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Great movie!!  We're getting into the Christmas mood early this year too!  "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" tonight!

Hugs!

Caela
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 22, 2020, 11:38:29 am
Great movie!!  We're getting into the Christmas mood early this year too!  "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" tonight!

Hugs!

Caela
Hope you enjoyed it!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 22, 2020, 02:57:43 pm
My isolation diary - day 18
Woke up at my leisure which is how I like my Sundays’ too!
Andy coming over at lunchtime so I’ve already looked out one of my nicest dresses (red) with matching underwear and pink stockings - spent an extra 45 mins getting ready to make sure my make-up was just right - quite pleased with the end product!
I think Andy appreciated it too! (Well, I KNOW he did!)
Had a lovely naughty hour together which always makes me feel good!
After a nap i made the most of a lovely day and went for a walk.
A couple of hours study for my data science course and now chilling in front of the tv!
A very nice Sunday!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201122/45c5f38b6b398db275b946d91e4d8eaf.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 23, 2020, 02:19:44 pm
My isolation diary - day 19
Im still no fan of Monday’s! Up at 05:30 for my run and time afterwards before my first meeting at 08:00 to get ready and do my make-up. I’m in a nice dress mood again today which means stockings too so feeling ultra feminine
Work not too bad  - i’m actually moving jobs in January so the job at the month has ceased to be quite so frustrating!
Big lockdown announcement today which doesn’t sound great - more restrictions which is a bit disheartening when I want to be able to go to Teesside every weekend to help out with Siobhan’s boys.
Hoping to see Andy tomorrow which will help!
Managed to watch 3 episodes of “Say yes to the dress” tonight which is so my fave program!
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201123/7a512a7553b24c975b9f9f1760ea406f.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 24, 2020, 03:19:04 pm
My isolation diary - day 20
I got up 20 minutes earlier for my run today so I had time before my first meeting to get properly ready as my Andy coming over for some naughtiness at lunchtime!
Don’t know about anyone else but I need an extra 25 minutes for blusher and highlighter and an extra 5 minutes for stockings!
After making all that effort he couldn’t come over which sums my week up! I sent him a pic showing some stocking to emphasise what he was missing though!
I’ve taken to feeding Martin snd Gerry in the concierge my home made sausage rolls, mince pies and apple crumble in an attempt to get to actually see someone (they are lovely guys!)

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201124/c96d49a0bf102740f02f408404b9b5c3.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: ChrissyRyan on November 24, 2020, 04:41:35 pm
My isolation diary - day 20
I got up 20 minutes earlier for my run today so I had time before my first meeting to get properly ready as my Andy coming over for some naughtiness at lunchtime!
Don’t know about anyone else but I need an extra 25 minutes for blusher and highlighter and an extra 5 minutes for stockings!
After making all that effort he couldn’t come over which sums my week up! I sent him a pic showing some stocking to emphasise what he was missing though!
I’ve taken to feeding Martin snd Gerry in the concierge my home made sausage rolls, mince pies and apple crumble in an attempt to get to actually see someone (they are lovely guys!)

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201124/c96d49a0bf102740f02f408404b9b5c3.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
That is a pretty dress Pammie.

Chrissy
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Margrit on November 25, 2020, 03:12:14 am
My isolation diary - day 20
I got up 20 minutes earlier for my run today so I had time before my first meeting to get properly ready as my Andy coming over for some naughtiness at lunchtime!
Don’t know about anyone else but I need an extra 25 minutes for blusher and highlighter and an extra 5 minutes for stockings!
After making all that effort he couldn’t come over which sums my week up! I sent him a pic showing some stocking to emphasise what he was missing though!
I’ve taken to feeding Martin snd Gerry in the concierge my home made sausage rolls, mince pies and apple crumble in an attempt to get to actually see someone (they are lovely guys!)

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201124/c96d49a0bf102740f02f408404b9b5c3.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

What a lovely dress, it fits you perfectly well.
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 25, 2020, 03:16:23 am
 
That is a pretty dress Pammie.

Chrissy
Awww thank you! Im in a nice dress kind of mood this week!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Pammie’s all new blog
Post by: Pammie on November 25, 2020, 03:16:51 am
What a lovely dress, it fits you perfectly well.
Why thank you! That’s really lovely of you xx


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk