I'm a proudly failed musician. Spent about 10 years in Portland and NYC giving it a try, counted up the money, realized it wasn't enough to buy a subway pass, and figured out a backup plan. I'm an architect now, which has worked out pretty well. I have my own practice, which means I can earn a living w/o workplace discrimination. I think I might even be able to be out, professionally, once I've finished bringing family into the loop. I came out to my stepson and his wife yesterday. They work in a university, so they're a bit more trans-aware than usual, and what I was telling them made sense to them. So I still have a bit of a happy buzz from that.
Even with the challenges, it must feel good to have the support that you've been needing for so long. (Well, I imagine there are probably a lot of different feelings going on). Something a little like that happened for me when a different stepkid came out as genderqueer about 4 years ago -- I think it helped gradually to open up more room for me to be what I am. Also helped me, a lot, to realize that was a choice one could make.
I wonder if there's anywhere people can post art here? I absolutely love seeing trans artists' work. (Not that I'm assuming you'd want to post, as a full-time artist. That's quite an achievement in itself).
Best of luck finding your surgeon. I'm sure everything is at a higher degree of difficulty than normal right now.
voidbird,
We have so much in common. I am impressed that you are running your own practice and getting by. That is an achievement too. Working as an artist full-time is really difficult because I never know when I'll sell. I have to live on state disability, then when I sell anything, it gets even more super tricky as you might imagine. The state wants you to make zero dollars, but they expect you to live on $900 a month.
And we also have the newly coming out thing in common as well. I didn't think I was all that closeted really, but I suppose, now that I'm looking for a surgeon, it's becoming "news," and now that my girlfriend is publicly out, that kind of outs me too! I had to tell my brother earlier this week (about my girlfriend), but I didn't mention my surgery thing. One thing at a time, right? I told him I was non-binary and pan-sexual, but I don't think he understands what all that means.
Today, I'm writing a blog post that details my situation. I haven't posted it yet and am a little nervous about it. Once you sell out changing your actual body, things get rather personal. On one hand, it's no one's business. On the other hand, it sucks to keep "hiding."
Don't call yourself a failed musician. I call myself an ex-drummer. Sounds better like I quit by choice. I still have my drums in a giant flight case. I've almost sold them, then couldn't bring myself to do it.
If I posted my art, I think that's outing myself even more! Is there a way to private message on here?
