Topic: What are your reasons for being non op?

[CosmicJoke]

Hi everyone. I don't necessarily identify as non op, but I was just wondering what some of your reasons are for deciding not to have the operation?
A little info on me is I am an MtF transgender person. I live fulltime and I have had a bilateral orchiectomy. I still would like to one day get the vaginoplasty, but I suppose I don't feel like it's paramount to living as a woman. There may be some who disagree but that's just how I feel on it. Anyone is welcome to add their thoughts.

[Lee H.]

I have had a bilateral orchiectomy.

How big a hassle was that, and could you say a little about effects, before and after?
I'm just on the threshold of HRT [assuming the VA endocrinologist cooperates], but I'm uncertain where this path will take me.

Thanks, ahd and a huge hug from,
~~Lee~~

[Allie Jayne]

Cosmic, we are all different, and have different needs. I am 66 y.o. and asexual, so no plans to use anything down there, and up until a couple of years ago, I didn't plan to medically transition. People related to me as a woman, and I was happy! At 65, my dysphoria exploded and I had to start HRT to bring it under control. I have always hated my genitals, but they had atrophied and were mostly inside, so much so my foreskin shrank so much I haven't seen my glans for 15 years (I had Hypogonadism) and there was just loose skin. But my dysphoria has led me to having a labiaplasty to get rid of offending tissue moreso than having a vagina. I just hope that will be enough to reduce my dysphoria.

I also will never see myself as a 'complete' woman without the other reproductive organs, and so having vaginoplasty would not result in a feeling of 'completeness' as I have heard others desire.

hugs,

Allie

[Nadine Spirit]

I wasn't going to go for a vaginoplasty, however after my orchi last year and my resulting depression, I changed my mind.  Which was weird because once I decided to go for it, found a dr, had a consult, got on the calendar, about two months later I began to recall memories from early childhood.  Apparently I knew what I wanted when I was super young, however by the time I was twelve I had decided to hide it, even from myself. 

So..... at one point I thought I was going to be non-op, and now I realize I've always been destined to arrive at this spot.  Go figure, being human is weird. 

Nobody has to have any surgery, just be true to yourself. 

[Pammie]

Hi everyone. I don't necessarily identify as non op, but I was just wondering what some of your reasons are for deciding not to have the operation?
A little info on me is I am an MtF transgender person. I live fulltime and I have had a bilateral orchiectomy. I still would like to one day get the vaginoplasty, but I suppose I don't feel like it's paramount to living as a woman. There may be some who disagree but that's just how I feel on it. Anyone is welcome to add their thoughts.

Hi and welcome!
I’m currently non-op but only because i’m not in a position to go private and the NHS waiting list means it will be at least a few years!
The only surgery I plan to I have is bottom surgery. I’m keen to be as much my natural self (HRT induced) as possible


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[CosmicJoke]

I have had a bilateral orchiectomy.

How big a hassle was that, and could you say a little about effects, before and after?
I'm just on the threshold of HRT [assuming the VA endocrinologist cooperates], but I'm uncertain where this path will take me.

Thanks, ahd and a huge hug from,
~~Lee~~

It was an outpatient procedure, just a one night stay. I wouldn't say it was a huge hassle but there was definitely some prep work to be done and the stress that comes with it but the healing wasn't bad. There may be soreness for a couple days after and you are supposed to sit on ice, but my pain tolerance is pretty good.
As for effects, it's really good for removing the source of testosterone from your body. An anti androgen will only do so much. The hormone estrogen works best with less testosterone, so if you're considering one I would say go for it.

[Kay Kozee]

I have just begun to stick my toes into the water of transitioning. I probably will not be able to go on HRT or have certain surgeries as I am a 2 time cancer survivor. My cancer was very aggressive and my markers went up a little so they are keeping a very close eye on me. So it is going to be non op for me. I have to play the cards that I was dealt.

[Maid Marion]

Hi Kay,

Sorry to hear of the cancer.

I've not done HRT either.  I am short and already have an hourglass figure,
so I am OK with how my body looks in the mirror.

Marion

[DawnOday]

I am a DES Son  AKA Transfemale.  Because of my mother being prescribed DES Diethylstilbestrol while I was in utero I was born with a micro penis and non descending testicles. Defective Aortic valve, Cardiomyopathy, Congestive heart failure. I've had a TIA, I am on blood thinners, I've had major depression forever until about five years ago. Cardiomyopathy and CHF had life expectancies of five years. Luckily I have been blessed with over 25 years of survival.

[Pammie]

Hi Kay,

Sorry to hear of the cancer.

I've not done HRT either.  I am short and already have an hourglass figure,
so I am OK with how my body looks in the mirror.

Marion

That’s interesting. Most of us go down the HRT route for the hormones themselves rather than the (very welcome) side effects. Do you not suffer from gender dysphoria or have you got other solutions to control it?


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[Maid Marion]

I don't seem to have an issue with gender dysphoria. 
I also a very feminine voice and mannerisms.
Enough to easily male fail at least three times when I got my Covid shot this morning.
I tied my hair back in a ponytail and wore a women's parka and boy's insulated pants as it was below 20 degrees.
The Walgreens paperwork only had options for male and female.  If there had been a nonbinary option like Hartford Hospital I would have picked that and put on nail polish.

I've been working on how I walk.  I'm getting old enough to where falling may soon be an issue.
I already have ton of lower leg strength from gardening so I've been working on balance and footwork.

Marion

[DeniseGrace]

Have lots of reasons for being non-op.

Cost. Had a serious medical issue (family was told I wouldn't live to morning).

That put me out of employment and onto disability.

Reputation - I was always considered the stable, successful one and adviser to others.

Due to HRT my down there parts are basically non-functional. Shrank more then 50% in size and rarely show any arousal.

My 2nd ex-wife stole basically all my assets. She left while I was at work taking all bank, cash, household, etc.

I love being feminine, but I don't have to have a vagina.

Very demeaning I know, but I was naive I guess I never knew about trans until seeing a porn video at about 21. It really hit me, they were the best of both worlds. Again, I know those are not trans positive images.

I was raised in a household of myself and 4 women. I feel more at home with women. I love looking at beautiful women. Have always been jealous of the sexy, attractive attire. Most male things are BORING.

I have had what I'd call bi experiences. I didn't initiate them, but did place myself where they could happen. I love looking at beautiful women, but would rather have a male partner.

The fact my "male equipment" is of little use has no impact, that's fine. I still have no desire to be surgically induced CIS genitals.

Just my take
DeniseGrace

[pamelatransuk]

I am having MDV very soon. I suppose it is debatable whether MDV counts as op or non-op but for me it certainly counts as op.

Of course I am very happy to confirm why I do not desire Vaginoplasty:

The secondary reason is that I do not want the the dilation/maintenance. The major overriding reason(s) for me are:

I am unhappy with my body although not as unhappy as I was before HRT which I have had for over 3 years meaning I must change my body down there. I  am happily asexual with minor lesbian tendencies and therefore I do not want a vagina for sexual participation. For me it is 100% about appearance and alignment of my body to match my mind.

I respect those of us who choose Vaginoplasty or nothing or any other option but for me it is quite simple - I believe MDV solves all for me.

Hugs

Pamela xx

[ramilove]

Coming down the home stretch at age 67, not in the best of health with two strokes and borderline obesity, I am less than an ideal candidate for a sexual reassignment surgery. Given my health history, I doubt I could find a surgeon that would perform the surgery in this country. The required investment in time, effort, pain and suffering, hard work, high risk of the surgery amounts to a lopsided costs to benefit ratio. I am transitioning into womanhood less the SRS and less estrogen or as one doctor said “A hormone free transition”.

[Pammie]

I am having MDV very soon. I suppose it is debatable whether MDV counts as op or non-op but for me it certainly counts as op.

Of course I am very happy to confirm why I do not desire Vaginoplasty:

The secondary reason is that I do not want the the dilation/maintenance. The major overriding reason(s) for me are:

I am unhappy with my body although not as unhappy as I was before HRT which I have had for over 3 years meaning I must change my body down there. I  am happily asexual with minor lesbian tendencies and therefore I do not want a vagina for sexual participation. For me it is 100% about appearance and alignment of my body to match my mind.

I respect those of us who choose Vaginoplasty or nothing or any other option but for me it is quite simple - I believe MDV solves all for me.

Hugs

Pamela xx

You don’t qualify as Non-op hun! You are aligning your body with your real self because you need to. Minimal depth doesn’t change that and is a perfectly valid option. As is no op of course for which I can read there are many valid reasons.


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[Julie H]

For me wpath won't allow me to. Ever since I started back up on hormones I haven't felt a need to transition and would likely loose too much if I were to. I don't make friends easily and loosing the ones I have might prove hazardous to my health. Not that they are a threat to me but the shear boredom without them would be harsh. I am for the most part non binary I present as male but I think that only my winter coat is unisex the rest are women's clothing that can appear male.

[Alanna1990]

the surgery is completely out of my league, I likely won't have the money in a very long time, that's the only reason, if I was a little more brave and/or dumb I'd grab a knife and be done with it, not even joking

[CosmicJoke]

the surgery is completely out of my league, I likely won't have the money in a very long time, that's the only reason, if I was a little more brave and/or dumb I'd grab a knife and be done with it, not even joking

I've had thoughts like that before too. I guess the thing I try telling myself is that it will be worth it if/when I ever get it. It may never happen for you or I, but if we're dead we definitely won't know.

[pamelatransuk]

You don’t qualify as Non-op hun! You are aligning your body with your real self because you need to. Minimal depth doesn’t change that and is a perfectly valid option. As is no op of course for which I can read there are many valid reasons.

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Thank you so much, Pammie

Hugs

Pamela xx

[Maid Marion]

I had my teeth fixed with implants because of the very high benefit to cost ratio.
I can now eat steak again!

The benefits of HRT and surgery are less clear as I'm not interested in men.

Marion