used the men's room for the first time

[Jeh]

I was at a roller derby match with my friend and I had to go to the bathroom. I felt way too dysphoric to use the women's room, and I'm always scared I'll get kicked out.

I used the men's room for the first time, and it was busy in there, too. I just went in, kept my head down, didn't look at anyone, and made a beeline for the stall.

I don't have an STP though, I can't afford one right now and I can't find a pharmacy that has medicine spoons to make one of my own, so I had to sit to pee. What I'm worried about is that someone will see me sitting and hear me peeing and go 'oh my god, a woman'. The guy in the stall next to me was peeing too, but I could see his feet and he was facing the toilet. I ended up sitting there holding it until there was enough noise that no one would hear me peeing.

Now that I've finally braved the men's room I want to keep using it, but I don't know how worried to be that someone will notice me sitting to pee. I mean, people say I pass, but sitting to pee could give me away because I don't know how well I pass.

What are your thoughts?

[jesse]

this is one of those things were the fear is worse then the reality if their is a place less likely for you to get busted its the male restroom believe me  on this one.. guys in restrooms routinly pee sitting down when they are also doing other things for one without being vulgar so the fact that your sitting will draw no attention at all when you do get your whatever it is thingy you need to pee remember the unritten rule of one empty urinal between 2 males unless the restroom is rediculously crowded. most guys wont even talk to you ib there i have always found it aakward when on a rare occasion a stranger talks to me while im using the restroom, and even then its a brief whats up or something so even voice should not give you awa be confident like the male you r and know one will ever know
jessi

[VannaSiamese]

I was at a roller derby match with my friend and I had to go to the bathroom. I felt way too dysphoric to use the women's room, and I'm always scared I'll get kicked out.

I used the men's room for the first time, and it was busy in there, too. I just went in, kept my head down, didn't look at anyone, and made a beeline for the stall.

I don't have an STP though, I can't afford one right now and I can't find a pharmacy that has medicine spoons to make one of my own, so I had to sit to pee. What I'm worried about is that someone will see me sitting and hear me peeing and go 'oh my god, a woman'. The guy in the stall next to me was peeing too, but I could see his feet and he was facing the toilet. I ended up sitting there holding it until there was enough noise that no one would hear me peeing.

Now that I've finally braved the men's room I want to keep using it, but I don't know how worried to be that someone will notice me sitting to pee. I mean, people say I pass, but sitting to pee could give me away because I don't know how well I pass.

What are your thoughts?

Congrats =)  I know it's such a great feeling getting to use the appropriate restroom for the first time.  If it makes you feel any better, the whole time I was a guy I would always sit to pee in the mens bathroom.  This had nothing to do with my gender issues either, I have a weird bathroom phobia where I don't like others to hear the sound of me pee... and sitting down to pee tends to make less sound then standing up.  What's funny is a lot of my guy friends admitted to having the same problem, and doing the same thing I was doing.. or always going into a stall at the very least. 
Don't worry about it... trust me, guys aren't paying attentions to other guys in the bathroom =) 

Honestly, at times I feel the same way about the women's restroom.  Even though I know that nobody could possibly figure out that I was ever a boy, I still sometimes get freaked out, thinking i'm taking too long in the stall or the sound of my pee is different than a girls or something.  It's really nothing to worry about, It's been 2 years and I've never even had somebody look at me odd... I just don't think the restroom is a place where people are very observant. 

[VeryGnawty]

What I'm worried about is that someone will see me sitting and hear me peeing and go 'oh my god, a woman'.

Some guys like privacy and will use the stall instead of urinals (because urinals are almost never enclosed).  It is not terribly uncommon for guys to use the stall (although admittedly they often do not sit or even lift the seat when they are not sitting).

The thing you have to understand about guys is that there are common social guidelines that are followed.  For example, in my area, it is very uncommon for a guy to be paying attention to another guy in the restroom.  If you are a curious person, maybe you'll give the other person a quick once-over.  If you do not make eye contact, chances are that nobody will ever say anything to you.  Remember, guys are in there to take a crap and a piss, and most of them don't care about anything but taking a crap and a pissing.  The men's room is not for holding social events.  This is not the women's room.

Occasionally there will be guys talking or whistling or singing to themselves while doing their business.  If you ignore them, chances are they will never talk to you.  If you are feeling sociable, make a short comment or two about the subject and wait to see how they react.  Never try to "force" yourself into guy's social circles, as this is very rude.  If they aren't interested in talking to you, finish your business and leave.

If someone does talk to you in the men's room, just reply as if you have a right to be there.  In my experience, most guys who make comments in public restrooms are very laid back.  I doubt they would want to make a scene even if they did suspect you weren't male.  (If anything, they'd probably be more curious as to why you are in the men's room in the first place)

[tekla]

The men's room is not for holding social events.  Because they smell like ass.  See: pissing and crapping.

[jesse]

as always our wonderful tekla blunt and too the point much love girl are you on the lala paluza tour
if i spelled that wrong just shoot me after all these years you would think id get that one correct
jessi

[Sephirah]

A lot of guys sit to urinate.

And most of the people in there are too intent on finishing their business and getting back out to be worried about the acoustic properties of some other guy sitting in a stall.

Every time I've been in a guy's restroom I've sat to pee and never had a single glance or comment. I think it's more likely if anyone thought anything at all, it's that you've got a urinary complaint / bowel disorder than the thought that it's anyone other than another guy being there.

[Cen]

No one is analyzing your position or the sound of your urination when you are in the stall.  Standing to pee is an option, not a required male behavior.

I understand why you would worry, though.  If the situation is reversed and an MTF stood to pee in the ladies room there would probably be some confusion if anyone noticed.

[VeryGnawty]

The men's room is not for holding social events.  Because they smell like ass.

Men's restrooms can smell very foul.  When I go in, I always intend to spend as little time in there as possible.

[Cindy]

If I have to use the guys toilet, and i do at work, I sit to pee. I haven't used a urinal for 20+ years.

Ok I'm a  woman in a situation but many many guys prefer to have a private wee.  And the only men who talk to each other in the toilet are close friends, and it is about sport.

In the ladies I can have an in depth description outside the stall about my handbag, boots, skirt etc that continues inside the stall. NO guys do that. Then we would wash nans ( rare for guys . do a little make up and hair and keep chatting. Going back to th table my date ask who was that? I say I have no idea, he looks confused. Men are quite simple creatures (and no that isn't sexist).

I realise there is an anatomical and sexual difference here but, you will never hear anything like: Whoops any one have a tampon and one is rolled down 3 or four stalls.

Cindy

[rexyrex]

well done for going in for the 1st time, dont worry about what they think, they don't care. i went in for the 1st time a few weeks ago .

[tekla]

Nah I'm not doing it, my tour days are long in the past now, I have a theater here and stay put.  Them buses lose their luster after a year or so.

[N.Chaos]

Congrats man. It's scary at first, I had the same fears for the longest time but the most that I've ever encountered was a drunk guy waddling in and out of the stall, yelling "Hey man I'm sorry I just gotta crap".

I'll just repeat what everyone else has said, yet again. I really doubt anyone's going to notice, in a guy's room everyone is just there to do their business and gtfo. Is that going to stop your fear? Probably not, because I still get a little worried from time to time too. Just try to keep it in mind, though.