menstrual question.

[Ryno]

Sorry if this is kinda touchy but I'm curious.

I was wondering if anyone else not on T (or at least who still have a menstrual cycle) experiences sort of like a hormonal shift during your rag? Like, sort of feel ... feminine. I don't mean you want to go shopping for shoes and baking cookies and cooing over babies or anything like that.

I mean, aside from the dysphoria and frustration I get from bleeding profusely from my crotch, I find myself almost enjoying femininity and it scares the ->-bleeped-<- out of me. I was talking to my roommate about it and he said he never felt that way, even before he decided to transition. Mind you, I never noticed this hormone thing until a little while after I came out. I used to be fairly feminine before I started transitioning while he was always horrifically uncomfortable with pretty much anything girly.

Anyway, just wondering if this is common among other guys, considering there's an increase in female hormones and crap during that god awful time of month.

[Renton]

I'm not sure what you mean by "enjoying femininity". Enjoying it in what way? Physically? Emotionally?

As far as I know, I've not experienced anything of this sort, but then again, I'm always too busy trying to relieve sickness and pain to notice anything.

[Espenoah]

I dunno if I enjoy femininity during that time per se, but I do find myself acting a lot more feminine. For instance, I'm a lot more willing to dance seductively in a womanly way. That's kind of a silly example, but it's one I notice most. XD
I think it's normal. Estrogen is going cray during that time after all.

[Lee]

I think that if anything I feel more male.  This is probably because my libido tends to be kicked up during that time. 

[Ryno]

I don't know what I meant by "enjoy". I'm just a lot more tempted to wear eyeliner on my eyes (rather than making a little beardy thing for pictures) and using cover up and attempting to dress in a more feminine way. Something about it freaks me out and I hate it but I just can't help it. So I guess that's what I meant by "enjoy". Kind of like a "torn in half" feeling, part of me wants nothing to do with it and hates every moment of the girliness, the other half just wants to grow my hair long again and straighten it and look sexy again.

Over the past month or two I've been swaying back and forth, settling on androgyny and deciding not to pursue hormone therapy. I guess that's another question I wanted to throw out there, how often do or did you guys seriously question your transition? My friend said he often thought about staying androgynous but finally got sick of floating around in gender limbo. Today I've suddenly hit a resurgence in my gender identity in that I again want to talk to my doctor to go on T. It's almost been a year now since I  first started admitting it to myself and 7 months since I started transitioning and living as male.

Anyway, I just wonder if I'm a genderless androgyn or if transitioning to male is the answer. How common is it to question this when you first start transitioning?

[Espenoah]

Yeah, the desire to be sexy I get. That sounds like what I get, if a little more extreme.

I questioned my gender a lot in the beginning, and sometimes still do...Sometimes I had moments where being androgynous seemed like the better option...but then I was forced to be in gender limbo for so long against my will that I decided I would rather be an extreme. I'll be male, but still have an adrogynous side I'm sure.
All I can suggest is try it out. Try living completely male for a while, then androgynous...see what expression feels most like you.

[Hadrian]

I've noticed, at least for me that I tend to wear more make up and am more compulsive with my decisions. But if anything I feel more of an urge to express my masculinity and I'm a very flamboyant guy, I look forward to starting T so that these pendulum reactions will cease. Oh, and I cry over really  stupid things, doesn't get much more girly than that.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that everyone's menstrual cycle effects them differently, and being trans makes things worse and more extreme, bc we're guys and shouldn't be bleeding down there.