Susan's Place Logo

News:

Visit our Discord server  and Wiki

Main Menu

Is being submissive with a man the same as shaving legs/lipstick?

Started by Francis Ann Burgett, July 06, 2011, 11:52:49 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Francis Ann Burgett

To us Girls that like men,

For me part of the mental transition was letting go completely as a woman to be with a straight man. Being as total a confident sexy woman as possible, totally feminine & with a straight type man that knows you are pre op. A man that you trust not to hurt you or cause you any trouble.

I just wonder how you other girls feel on this subject?
  •  

A

How I feel about this is that it seems unclear. Can you explain your question again? I'm not sure I get what you want to know.
A's Transition Journal
Last update: June 11th, 2012
No more updates
  •  

Annah

Quote from: Francis Ann Burgett on July 06, 2011, 11:52:49 PM
To us Girls that like men,

For me part of the mental transition was letting go completely as a woman to be with a straight man. Being as total a confident sexy woman as possible, totally feminine & with a straight type man that knows you are pre op. A man that you trust not to hurt you or cause you any trouble.

I just wonder how you other girls feel on this subject?

Your topic question and your post seems to be two entirely different issues so I am not sure what you mean.

My boyfriend and I are on equal footing and on equal ground. To me, it is like any responsible man/woman relationship. But, again, i do not understand your thread
  •  

Francis Ann Burgett

Perhaps this in not a subject to open up? I'm having a difficult time explaining & clarifying.

For me during my mental transition early in life I tried on some men I guess similar to trying on a new pair of pumps or a dress.
Both seemed steps to becoming an experienced total woman to me.

Just wondered if other MtF women also practiced with men like walking in 3 inch pumps for the first time?
  •  

Annah

Quote from: Francis Ann Burgett on July 07, 2011, 12:54:55 AM
Perhaps this in not a subject to open up? I'm having a difficult time explaining & clarifying.

For me during my mental transition early in life I tried on some men I guess similar to trying on a new pair of pumps or a dress.
Both seemed steps to becoming an experienced total woman to me.

Just wondered if other MtF women also practiced with men like walking in 3 inch pumps for the first time?

For me, being with a man is as natural as me putting on a dress. I never had the thought of "practicing with men." When it comes to your sexual orientation, i believe that should occur naturally for you.

As for pumps, i don't care for them...only wear them to formal occasions. I like them as much as I liked wearing ties when I presented male (and I hate wearing ties).
  •  

Francis Ann Burgett

Thanks Annah & Rabbit.

I know the nice feeling when around/close to a man. It is just who we are I guess.  But still also love my lipstick & little pumps.
  •  

Annah

Quote from: Francis Ann Burgett on July 07, 2011, 05:13:22 AM
Thanks Annah & Rabbit.

I know the nice feeling when around/close to a man. It is just who we are I guess.  But still also love my lipstick & little pumps.

Francis,

Can I ask you something? I don't mean any disrespect but I am simply curious.

Do you find being with a man a fulfillment of a fetish desire or do you find being with a man a simply natural thing because you just know that your soul is attracted to men?

The only reason why I ask this is because usually people associate lipstick and pumps to a sexual attraction of someone as a fetish and I noticed you always use those combination in your posts when talking about men.

Or do you associate pumps and lipstick as being feminine and, likewise, being with a man as feminine?
  •  

Lilly_Mossiano

I have to agree with you Annah from reading this post your question was one I was wondering about as well
Check out my new book My New Mommy at http://www.publishamerica.net/product48909.html
  •  

Francis Ann Burgett

Annah,

I was having fun talking about shoes & makeup.

I've always been a girl since early childhood & always attacted to men.
Also I loved to play dress up as a little girl. Guess it has always carried over.

Francis
  •  

Hikari

To be fair, I don't think sexuality always comes "naturally" to people, some people (both cis and trans) just don't have an easy time figuring out where they are with things. Of course to some it does come naturally, just remember everyone is a bit different.

With respect though, if one wants to "try on" anyone regardless of gender, do make sure they are aware of the causal nature of things.

As to the original topic, I don't have any interest in men so I can't really say much, I am a more of a submissive person in the bedroom, but certainly not exclusively so, but I don't feel either has too much to do with my gender. I don't doubt though, that to some women regardless of orientation probably find submission an important part of their identity, but I don't quite feel like that.
15 years on Susans, where has all the time gone?
  •  

Francis Ann Burgett

Hikari, Thank you for your comments. My best wishes to you

Life is complicated to myself & as I'm sure it is to most of us.

Mentally always a girl/woman. Always attracted to boys/men. Physically a male. Stuck, frustrated, want & need a female body but cannot see how to really change the body I have, it is just too male. My situation is like most of us I guess. For those so lucky to have a body that fits their mental state of mind I am very glad for them. For those of us that have such a challenge with any successful physical transition I surely know & feel your pain.

A friend to all,

Francis
  •  

EmilyElizabeth

You should never consider any of these things (shaving your legs, wearing lipstick, being submissive with a man) as part of some criteria that you feel you need to meet to be a "real" woman.  Real women do all of those things, but they also can do none of those things, or something else in between.  There is nothing that you absolutely NEED to do be a women other than what you yourself want to do.  If that includes being submissive with a man, then you should go ahead and do that, but not if you're just trying to fit some kind of standard you think is set for you.  It is also not a requirement for you to be submissive just because you're a woman who's attracted to men.  Be dominant if that's what you want for you.  Or be versatile.  Or if you truly want to be submissive to men, then go ahead.  Just ALWAYS make sure you're not doing it for anyone but you.  And remember, there is no right or wrong way to be a woman.


  •  

Francis Ann Burgett

Thanks Emily,

I'm glad for you, you seem at peace & look nice. You go girl friend.

I just love being a woman, for myself, love being as pretty as possible for myself 100%. It is great to do my nails, shave legs, makeup, shopping, sewing some, cooking, being nice & pink. I love all parts of being a woman really. Passable for short periods of time but hard to live full time, I still have too much facial hair, beard. Some electrolysis but still too much hair.  Maybe HRT will kick back in to help some. On & off of HRT for most of my life.

To me is fun/great to date a new man. For most they get so excited when they see me. I kinda melt away & just go for the ride. Men want to be in control so I gladly let them. I'm not sure why but it feels really great to just let the man do whatever he needs to be happy. I am careful screening men to make sure it is not someone that will hurt me. Men are really kind of easy to handle for the most part.

If I can ask how do you feel with your HRT?

Francis 

  •  

Annah

just remember, some women love baseball, football, ice hockey, driving trucks, getting dragon tattoes on their necks, black belt instructors, police officers, judges, CEOs, etc etc
  •  

Lisbeth

Quote from: Francis Ann Burgett on July 06, 2011, 11:52:49 PM
To us Girls that like men,

For me part of the mental transition was letting go completely as a woman to be with a straight man. Being as total a confident sexy woman as possible, totally feminine & with a straight type man that knows you are pre op. A man that you trust not to hurt you or cause you any trouble.

I just wonder how you other girls feel on this subject?

I really have problems with what you are saying. First off, I'm a dyed-in-the-wool feminist; this whole idea of "being submissive with a man" has nothing to do with being a woman. I'm glad you included the "for me" to your post, but... I see grave danger for you or anyone who pursues "a straight type man that knows you are pre op."
"Anyone who attempts to play the 'real transsexual' card should be summarily dismissed, as they are merely engaging in name calling rather than serious debate."
--Julia Serano

http://juliaserano.blogspot.com/2011/09/transsexual-versus-transgender.html
  •  

EmilyElizabeth

Quote from: Lisbeth on July 08, 2011, 02:17:01 PM
I really have problems with what you are saying. First off, I'm a dyed-in-the-wool feminist; this whole idea of "being submissive with a man" has nothing to do with being a woman. I'm glad you included the "for me" to your post, but... I see grave danger for you or anyone who pursues "a straight type man that knows you are pre op."
Thanks Lisbeth, you got across the jist of what I wanted to say in a much more concise fashion.  :D


  •  

Vicky

I am beginning to have fantasies about relations with men, but not as submissive or dominant, just happily cooperative as the female partner.  In the mid 1970's there was a movie called The Turning Point which was storied on the ballet world, and one of the scenes was of a heterosexual couple of young dancers having a love making session, but done as a form of ballet.  It was NOT pornographic in any way, it was a beautiful dance pairing. That is one of my fantasies
I refuse to have a war of wits with a half armed opponent!!

Wiser now about Post Op reality!!
  •  

Francis Ann Burgett

No intent to irritate everyone. Kind of a unorganized question to begin with.

Chill, have great day.
  •