I actually have the opposite issue (high testosterone, plus the ability to orgasm multiple times leads to fairly constant sexual arousal/masturbation), but my spouse has a very low sex drive, so I can offer some of what helps for him.
You've said that you find your partner attractive, which is a wonderful thing and should help with these exercises.
Have the pair of you tried exploring your body to find erogenous zones that don't center on your genitalia? They show up in some very strange places. Back of the knee, elbow, shoulder, neck, ears, jawline, stomach, etc. Try doing an evening where for at least an hour neither of you touch the others genitalia, instead kissing and stroking along places that might seem odd to find something that just turns you on.
It's said that absence makes the heart grow fonder and that's all about what this next exercise is about. Try having a night where one or the other of you can touch the other anywhere you like, but the other can't touch back. If you're into it, light rope binding can help. The reason that this sometimes works is that people can reach a heightened state of arousal without any contact of their own body simply by controlling their partner's arousal. Effectively it's a 'power trip', but, just like the prior suggestion, it removes all contact with your own sexual organs, which might help reduce dysphoria.
'Dirty talk'. Whether you have one physically (yet) or not, being told all the things that she wants you to do to her with your 'rock hard dick' can be a huge turn on. If you're into it, have her talk it up. There are even ways to 'dirty talk' cleanly, though you might want to look into up fairly 'classy' erotica for the purpose of that. I like to think that I write such, but mine happens to be centered for gay males. Odd as it sounds, there's a beautiful scene in Anne Rice's 'The Mummy' that might tantalize you both to read.
While I can't guarantee any of these will work, they do help with my husband and I. I wish you the best of luck.
