This evening I took myself along to a bar, to a weekly social meeting of bi/lesbian women. This was a pretty big deal for me - I got in touch with them beforehand and told them about myself, and asked whether they thought I'd be welcome there, as I didn't want to be uncomfortable or make anyone else uncomfortable. They replied that it's open to anyone who identifies as a bi/lesbian woman, and they had other trans women and ex-trans women (as they put it) who come along.
So I summoned up some nerve and went along on my own this evening, and couldn't have felt more welcomed. Around 15 women came and went over a couple of hours, and I spent time chatting and listening with a few of them, met one in particular who I got on really well with, who shares an interest in textiles (and a profound lack of interest in owning a tv!).
This feels like a coming-out
2 for me, because while I was there partly as my first social outing as a trans woman among women, I was also out for the first time as being bi among bi/lesbian women, who (for whatever reason these things happen) really feel like my tribe. It felt very good to be accepted just as I am right now, looking as I do, dressing as I do - they were curious about where I am in the transition journey, but more just about where I live, what I'm doing with my life, normal getting to know each other stuff. One of them who works at the met office here (the national weather bureau kind of thing) told me she has several MTF colleagues where she works, and that the whole place had dealt with their transitions very sensitively. Maybe I should look for a job there
.
Anyway, I'm very grateful to Women on Wednesdays - I'll be back (especially as the cinema bar where we were meeting played ELO's Mr Blue Sky, immediately followed by Magazine's Definitive Gaze, which made me feel right at home
).
