Almost Perfect by Brian Katcher

[Debra]

From my blog: http://blog.jericanation.com/2011/02/almost-perfect.html

Almost Perfect

I just finished reading a book called Almost Perfect By Brian Katcher.

Let me rephrase that. I just finished crying my eyes out, laughing, smiling, crying with joy, and crying my eyes out some more while reading this book. I couldn't put it down and for the first time in a long time, I read a 350 page book in one sitting.

The story is about a boy, a senior in high school who meets the "new girl" at school and they start getting close but she keeps pulling away even though she's flirty. One day, he kisses her and she tells him she's transgender. (Note: in the story she actually says she's 'a boy' which i really hate) He at first freaks out and can't deal with it...all he can think of is that he kissed a BOY. But after a while they rekindle things and their relationship kind of goes up and down throughout the whole story.

Let me just say that while I didn't transition at 14 like the girl in the story, I can still relate to her experiences in so many ways. Her parents reject her, they're ashamed of her, they move her out of state and home school her for 5 years after she tries to commit suicide and they see they cant make her "act like a boy". It's only after she turns 18 that they can't stop her from going to public school...and that's how she meets the main character.

I cried every time she was rejected by the main character....I cried like it was my own....because I have been rejected like that already in the past year by many guys who really "don't get it". The main character kept having these stupid revelations like "wow she really has boobs" and "wow she doesn't look or sound or feel like a boy at all" and I just wanted to scream at him "OF COURSE NOT! SHE'S A GIRL!"

The worst part was when she went out with a different guy to make the main character jealous and the guy literally beat the snot out of her. I bawled. She went to the hospital and didn't want to live anymore and was committed to a psychiatric hospital. Wait that still wasn't the worst part. The worst part was when the main character comes to see her at the hospital and she tells him that she's moving away and never wants to see him again because she never wants him to see her as a man....because she's detransitioning. I cried so hard I couldn't read the pages at that point.

She had such a hard time living as a girl, being rejected, and realizing that her life would never be the same...she would always have to tell someone. Someone would always have to know. She was opting for the other way out, a fate worse than death, a life of complete misery: trying to be something she was most definitely not: a man. The main character feels so completely horrible, i think he (and the reader) truly just want her to be who she really is, whether she ever sees him again or not.

I have a lot of mixed emotions after reading this book and in fact, I'm feeling very emotionally drained. On one hand, I'm thankful that my circumstances in some ways were quite different and I have been very fortunate. On another hand I'm insanely jealous that she got to start transition at 14 and that by 18 she had 36B breasts. (not to mention no male puberty to screw her body up) But yet on the other hand, reading about her giving up and talking about detransition tore at my heart so badly. I'm realizing right now as I write this that I fear detransition worse than I will ever fear death.

When she talked about her own suicide attempt, I was taken back to that night a year and a half ago when I, myself was unable to keep living. I don't know why but sometimes I doubt that night, maybe because I was in a crazed state thanks to the men's bible study or maybe because it didn't seem to affect my parents and their decision to disown me in any way. But I am reminded that it was very real and after all I have been through and all the joy I have experienced (despite all the pain too) I could find myself back in that garage with the engine running if the only other option was to "be a man".

In closing, I'd like to thank the author for the Author's note in the back that not only tells the reader that these kinds of events really have happened (and still happen) to transgender people but also warns transgender readers to seek help and gives a few resources to do so.

I'd recommend the book to anyone, transgender or not.

[Espenoah]

I found this book by accident when I asked my friend to pick out a random book from the library. She picked the book saying "This is the Almost Perfect book for you."
Little did she know that it's now one of my favorite books.
I made all of my friends read it after me, none of which were transgender, and they loved it. I also recommend it for anyone.

[jamied]

I got the book and read it after someone else posted a review and liked it so much that I gave it to my daughter who is the head of the English department at the high school where she teaches.  She is going to try to get it included in next year's lesson plan.

[Elsa]

   Searching for this book everywhere... guess its not available here and by the looks of things wont be for sometime...

[Constance]

I checked this book out from my local public library, read it, and loved it. I, too, would recommend this book to anyone.

[Mrs Erocse]

A friend of mine shared this site with me for buying books.

http://www.abebooks.com/

It is really reasonable. It has new and used books.

I ordered my copy here.

Hope this helps all of you with your search.
Hugs,
Patty

[caitlin_adams]

It's available on Amazon.com for Kindle, so you can download it.

[sandra]

  Thanks, Caitlin, for a great review, and to all for comments.  I had been reading a number of lesbian romance novels w/happy endings B4 this one, and of course in "Almost Perfect," I was floored by the brutality, and by the lack of understanding from the boyfriend.  But as you say, this is based on true stories - and they don't always "live happily ever after."  This book was for me a reminder of the fact that there's still a whole lot of violence and misunderstanding out there, and we all have a lot of work to do.

But this is certainly an outstanding book, and I'm glad I read it.

Sandra