Unlucky trans?

[Natkat]

I was with 2 transgender people,
both got homones, and pretty much look like there gender,
and both have more or less accepting parrents..
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they where talking about how there where they lucky trans because they could pass and I didnt count in.
I try say its just because im femenine but in general im not much more femenine than that many people, im just born with a very femenine face and a less accepting mom who didnt want me to take homones as much as posible..

but I feel like s*** people always jugdementing me on my look "you look like a girl bla bla" kinda stuff..
or "your so unlucky" its not like it makes me feel better if people point it out..
I dont know what to say im just pissed and sad... because NO matter what I do I still got my very femenine face, and no matter what I do I seam like people are jugdementing me accepting me less, and so on,

[meh]

Are you part asian? I think my asian face makes me seem more feminine for some reason. I'm almost 6 months on T and don't pass very well.

There was this one "stud" lesbian on youtube who was making fun of the more feminine looking trans guys saying how she was more masculine looking than some of the guys who've been on T for months and months.  Like really? If I could control my feminine features, I would.

[Natkat]

Are you part asian? I think my asian face makes me seem more feminine for some reason. I'm almost 6 months on T and don't pass very well.

There was this one "stud" lesbian on youtube who was making fun of the more feminine looking trans guys saying how she was more masculine looking than some of the guys who've been on T for months and months.  Like really? If I could control my feminine features, I would.

yeah diffently I would as well, its not like I would like to be extremly maculine but I would like to pass as a normal guy for a point.
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nope im not, but actually some people think I look asian for a reason. I got blue eyes and white skin, but im pretty slim with soft features and compared to many other guys, pretty small (1,72cm) so if people see me in black/white photos they think im asian (with big eyes).

I thinks its all about the face and voice, my  voice isnt really deep neither high, but my face is as I said pretty soft andogyne looking but more femenine than maculine.

[Da Monkey]

Don't let them get you down.

I have an FTM friend who is very 'alpha male' and when I first came out to him he told me I probably wouldn't be able to pass. We worked together too and when I was pre-t and pre-op he seemed to act like he always passed so much better than me almost. Then a manager said to him that she thought I passed better and he got really mad. I wasn't there at the time and he never told me that story obviously but my girlfriend was there when it happened.

Even now when I see him he almost likes to rub his life in my face. Asking if I am going to work in a factory for the rest of my life and ->-bleeped-<- like that while he is going to become Mr. Businessman.

A lot of that might be from their insecurities and them seeing you as a target to make themselves feel better about passing or whatever.

Try not to worry since I too had a very feminine face and soft features before I was on T, now no one knows at all about me.

[HarryP]

Don't feel down mate  I agree with Da Monkey - some people just put others down to boost their own confidence, but it doesn't actually do them any good in the end.

Also, as another small guy with feminine features, I know it's hard, but I know several cisguys with feminine features and they are so handsome - so when we start T, we'll be right studs and everyone will be jealous of us! 

[Natkat]

Don't feel down mate  I agree with Da Monkey - some people just put others down to boost their own confidence, but it doesn't actually do them any good in the end.

Also, as another small guy with feminine features, I know it's hard, but I know several cisguys with feminine features and they are so handsome - so when we start T, we'll be right studs and everyone will be jealous of us! 

thats pretty much my worry, I have been on T for 3 mounths, got testrogel in first place. got bigger mucles, little hair on the stomach and my voice drop but you can't hear it unless I sing in high tones.

but still after 3 mounts im unsure if T would make me pass, there where a gender-queer who asked me if I would go all the way because she didnt really felt like going the whole way if she never could pass anyway.. and I where like "sure I wont go all the way like having bottom surgery but I wont go back to be female."
still the felling of "what if not even T could make you pass?" is kinda scary, I am so looking forward to if I could get beard, but the guy I know who got alot of hair on his stomack almost have no beard, and I only got very little hair on my stomack. I think it would make me pass, also having top surgery. so there is hope but the felling is still scary. time will probebly go for the better, but still the thoughts are so scaring..

as again, I dont mind passing as a totally macho guy because im not that maculine anyway, I just want people to see me as a guy and not a girl.. and mostly so I dont have to correct them or ask them to if you get what I mean. its my dream and its so simple and so hard..
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Monkey; I felt like being putted down but I dont think it where the ment to as rude as I felt it became. the person is actually a friend of mine, and I dont think she put a meaning to be evil into it so I didnt react that much, still I felt like being putted down pretty much long after the episode, the other person said "well actutally there where something I where lucky with" but I never got to hear the answer of what it was, because we got interupted in our conversation.

I do follow you on the point of putting someone down to feel better about themself. I guess I also somethimes do the "look how bad it could be and see how lucky you are" kinda tequnicue to feel better about myself.
if I should be honest I dont think she pass that much better than me as a girl than I do as a guy.
I think its more a question that for mtf its sometimes more easy to pass because you dont expect guys to dress in girl clothes and for girls they can all be tomboys and still girls you know.

but well I must take this to my knowlegde not to put people down just to put myself high. remember and be a good human kind..
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im glad for you replays btw.

[Da Monkey]

Yeah 3 months is still really early to tell. Are you on blockers too?

I remember when I first started my voice didn't drop at all for the first maybe month and a half. I was starting to worry that T wouldn't do anything at all for me and even my FTM friend was getting worried for me. Then not even a few weeks after that it just dropped suddenly. But I was also on the blockers.

As for the beard, I didn't start getting any facial hair until maybe 4 or 5 months on T even then it was barely noticeable. Now being on T for almost 2 years I have almost a chin strap but no mustache or soul patch or anything like that yet. But then there are people who are on T for 1 month with a full goatee or people on T for 6 months with a full beard. Or some who can never grow one at all. Just be patient and eventually it will help you grow into yourself.

[Nygeel]

It took me a long time to have changes. At 9 months I have a few random chin hairs but that's it. Today I had an appointment and even with new people who don't know my name read me as clearly female and one of the people there kept picking out really feminine glasses.

So, I'm on the same boat. Still seen as female close to all the time after 9 months on T.

Edit to add: It took me about 6 years to start hormones after coming out.

[Natkat]

Yeah 3 months is still really early to tell. Are you on blockers too?

I remember when I first started my voice didn't drop at all for the first maybe month and a half. I was starting to worry that T wouldn't do anything at all for me and even my FTM friend was getting worried for me. Then not even a few weeks after that it just dropped suddenly. But I was also on the blockers.

As for the beard, I didn't start getting any facial hair until maybe 4 or 5 months on T even then it was barely noticeable. Now being on T for almost 2 years I have almost a chin strap but no mustache or soul patch or anything like that yet. But then there are people who are on T for 1 month with a full goatee or people on T for 6 months with a full beard. Or some who can never grow one at all. Just be patient and eventually it will help you grow into yourself.

nope.. however my doctor is pretty openminded so I dont think it would be that hard to get them. so far I just wanted to start up slowly so I only got T so far.
I dont know that much about blockers either as I had reasearched T.