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So I'm thinking of growing a beard

Started by Squirrel698, August 12, 2011, 02:20:22 PM

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Squirrel698

I'm a bit fuzzy right now, especially under my chin.  Right now I'm just letting it grow and waiting to see what happens.  It's about 75% dark hairs and 25% lighter hairs.  So it probably won't ever even out but it's worth a shot.

The funny thing is, people who I thought were accepting are suddenly freaking out.  For example the babysitter is an older woman and she's always been perfectly friendly.  Now she's pointedly keeping her distance and not meeting my eyes.  It's like I have the plague or something.  The same story goes for my neighbour.  Also an older women and she has a tendency to poke her nose in where it doesn't belong.  She'll avoid pronouns while talking to me and gets them wrong when talking to my partner.  It just pisses me off.  I've been at this for 18 months or so.  You'd think they would learn by now.

It's fine for me to be transgender without any facial hair but as soon as I have some it's a whole different story.  Which really sucks because it tells me that those people were just doing lip service.  They didn't actually believe what they were trying so hard to remember to say.
"It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul"
Invictus - William Ernest Henley
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wallflower

For those that knew you previously I'd imagine it is tough as it is one of the defining physical characteristics between gender lines. It's odd when any guy goes from being clean shaven to having a beard though so don't take it to heart!
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Ratchet

I think the beard, or facial hair growth brings the reality home. Without it they can act like it isn't true, or there. But you introduce the beard, it's a whole different ball game. My little cousin always goes "You're growing a bearrd!" She's so used to seeing no hair on my face. I find it amusing.

All I can really say... DO IT!
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Renate

#3
I think that many of us run into other people's invisible borders.
"I knew that you were transsexual but I never thought that you'd ever do that."

Grow a beard.
Personally I think that it's the only perquisite of being a male.
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tekla

Facial hair pretty much equals weird.  Weirdo Beard-O.  You might be one of those - neck beard hipsters / bikers / hippies / Gay Bears / Amish freaks.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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PixieBoy

If you can grow it, show it!

I want some kind of facial hair, I'd love to have sideburns and a goatee or something. Or at least the ability to grow it.
...that fey-looking freak kid with too many books and too much bodily fat
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Sharky

Go for it! I guess it's just sinking in for them. Maybe you could dye the lighter hairs.
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Devlyn

Paul, go for it, and I want a picture posted, too! Remember, what anyone else thinks is unimportant at the end of the day.
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bojangles

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cynthialee

Having facial hair seems to be the one thing all the trans guys I know IRL are obsessed with. And I can't say I blame them. Facial hair is a MALE thing. It would be natural for you to want it.
Yay for growing facial hair.
Boo for the ass hats that cant get over it.

18 months is long enough for people to wrap their heads around this.
So it is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you can win a hundred battles without a single loss.
If you only know yourself, but not your opponent, you may win or may lose.
If you know neither yourself nor your enemy, you will always endanger yourself.
Sun Tsu 'The art of War'
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Greg

Have a go, it's your face after all. Prepare yourself for it looking scruffy for several weeks though. I've got to about the 3 week mark a couple of times but it looks crappy so I end up trimming it.
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Squirrel698

Thanks for the encouragement everyone!  I'm not sure how this is going to go.  I'm thinking maybe a chin strap as there seems to be no growth on my chin.  Only under my jaw and on my cheeks.

We will see.  ;D
"It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul"
Invictus - William Ernest Henley
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tekla

Hipster neck-beard, then you can wear the ironic trucker cap and go to Burning Man.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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sneakersjay

Quote from: cynthialee on August 12, 2011, 05:45:35 PM
Having facial hair seems to be the one thing all the trans guys I know IRL are obsessed with. And I can't say I blame them. Facial hair is a MALE thing. It would be natural for you to want it.
Yay for growing facial hair.
Boo for the ass hats that cant get over it.

18 months is long enough for people to wrap their heads around this.

I also keep it as a reminder to those prone to forgetting pronouns.  When all the clients see is MALE, you look like an idiot when you mess up.  That and I'm too lazy to shave.


Jay


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Squirrel698

Quote from: tekla on August 12, 2011, 09:54:57 PM
Hipster neck-beard, then you can wear the ironic trucker cap and go to Burning Man.

Hehe are you going to buy me a ticket Tekla, because I'd love to go.
"It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul"
Invictus - William Ernest Henley
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tekla

No doubt you'd love it too.  Lot's of people like you up on the Playa having a good old time.  I love BM myself.  Those two weeks in SF are great.  All the cool bars are empty, no crowds to fight, mellow.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Squirrel698

Quote from: sneakersjay on August 13, 2011, 07:52:51 AM
I also keep it as a reminder to those prone to forgetting pronouns.  When all the clients see is MALE, you look like an idiot when you mess up.  That and I'm too lazy to shave.

I swear I want to introduce your coworkers to my good friend, Mr. Baseball Bat.  How can they misgender you when you have a beard?  My God.

Quote from: tekla on August 13, 2011, 08:27:27 AM
No doubt you'd love it too.  Lot's of people like you up on the Playa having a good old time.  I love BM myself.  Those two weeks in SF are great.  All the cool bars are empty, no crowds to fight, mellow.

I'm hoping all of those cool empty bars serve tea, because I'm thinking that will be right up your alley. 
"It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul"
Invictus - William Ernest Henley
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tekla

Yeah, when they see me comin' they think "Better get that tea ready, she's going to be pounding the Arnold Palmers today."  Don't 'ch dare stand between me and some nice Oolong or else.  It ain't pretty when I get me tea in me.  Just look what tea did in England last week.  Not to mention the Tea Party here.  Tea binges are destroying society.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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PixieBoy

Neckbeards are hipster now? Why? That's just what lazy fa/tg/uys have because they can't be bothered to shave properly.
...that fey-looking freak kid with too many books and too much bodily fat
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