Am I transgendered if I don't want a penis?

[robokot]

OK, so I identify as a gay male, I feel disconnected to my female body, want a flat chest but to be honest I don't want to have a penis. If T could make me grow a proper one I'd be fine with it, but I don't really feel any dysphoria about not having a penis. Having a uterus, yes, It does bother me, but the fact of not having male reproductive organs does not.

I dunno, sometimes I feel very confused. People here go on about packing and using STP devices but this just seems wrong for me to do, it would make me feel even more fake-male than a male. At least with hormones it's my own body that's changing into a male body.
So can you be a transgender male if you don't feel any need of having a penis. I know these are all just labels but I was wondering how people here feel about it.

[AbraCadabra]

Woopsy, Light

* so I identify as a gay male * and * to be honest I don't want to have a penis. *

That sounds problematic, not sure if I'd find it confused though, because it's what you say you feel.

I guess to be a trans-male is no issue without AMAB genitals, but as for gay-males... in my experience, that seems a big no-no.
That "missing" member is one of the most cherished parts in THAT community. Where, the "bigger the better" is the rule. YMMV

Axelle

[Quicksand]

You can totally be a transdude while experiencing all of those feelings.  I am much the same way.  Didn't want a penis if it wasn't real/aesthetically pleasing, never bothered with STP/packers, never had any major dysphoria about it, etc.  Being trans is all how you define it.  If you identify as a male, regardless of sexual orientation, and you are genetically female, then it sounds like you are trans!  A lot of times people's feelings change as they align their physical appearance with their gender identity as well.

Maybe down the road you'll find yourself wanting a penis, regardless of how it's obtained or how it looks.  If you don't, that's fine too!  I wouldn't stress about the penis issue.  Very few people find out what's going on down there anyway.  Focus on making yourself happy, and it sounds like hormones and other aspects of transition might be a part of it!

Edit: And as far as your love life, while there may be some penis-fixation in the gay community, if you put yourself out there you will certainly be able to find nice guys who are interested in you regardless of your genitalia!

[malinkibear]

Of course you are. There aren't any set rules for what makes someone more or less transgendered than someone else. Some people have terrible dysphoria about what they do or don't have, others are more okay with it. I'm a lot like you, I don't like having a uterus or female productive organs (will hopefully get them removed at some point), but nor am I gagging for a penis. I don't particularly want a packer or prosthetic, it's cool. We're all different.

[justmeinoz]

As they say; if it walks like duck, and quacks like a duck, it's most likely a duck.

If you identify as male, and being considered as female causes you distress, then that's a fair enough description of GID.  The state of your genitalia is a different question, simply making you non-op, which given the state of the medical art for FtM, is a reasonable position.

If you were a cis-male and lost your penis in an accident you would still be considered male. 

Karen.

[RyGuy]

the standards of care state that a patient must have significant distress over the fact that their genitals are wrong and find their existing ones disgusting and so on and so forth. i don't think the penis makes the man, but i don't understand all of the "trans" people who have no desire for one. forget the fact that the surgeries are unrealistic. have you ever met a MAAB person (that is not MTF trans or androgyne) that said "yeah I don't really care if I have a dick or not. i don't really want one."?

[brandnewman]

RyanThomas, you don't have to understand it, you just have to accept the fact that other transmen feel differently than you do, period. There is a lot of variety in how each of us feel about our bodies. As for the "standards of care", I don't agree with them. I don't think my genitals are disgusting, and neither does my partner.

[Quicksand]

Also, we can't just "forget" the fact that the surgeries are unrealistic.  That's the main reason everyone who has posted  here stating they don't care about their genitalia has given for not wanting a penis.  If we could have a fully-functioning, natural male penis, I think most transmen would want one.  It's healthy and mature to come to terms with the fact that that is not possible, though, and instead just deal with having female genitalia rather than shelling out a ton of money for unrealistic surgery or dealing with the hassle of an STP packer.

Furthermore, the standards of care present four criteria that must be met for a GID diagnosis:

Long-standing and strong identification with another gender
Long-standing disquiet about the sex assigned or a sense of incongruity in the gender-assigned role of that sex
The diagnosis is not made if the individual also has physical intersex characteristics.
Significant clinical discomfort or impairment at work, social situations, or other important life areas.

It does not say you have to have significant distress over genitalia.

[mowdan6]

We all transition differently.  Some guys are fine with just having chest surgery.  Other guys, like myself, need the complete overhaul, the complete surgery.  For myself, until I can find a way to get the bottom surgery, I will always deal with this body dysphoria.  But, my experience is not your experience. 

[Lee]

We all have different things that bother us, and if you're okay with not having a penis more power to you.  It seems like a lot of guys on here feel similarly.

[Natkat]

well sure..
its very diffrent how people having it.

[Adio]

the standards of care state that a patient must have significant distress over the fact that their genitals are wrong and find their existing ones disgusting and so on and so forth.

Source please?  You've mentioned this several times (in other posts).  I still cannot find any source to back up those statements.  I've checked the DSM-IV and the WPATH SOC.

To the OP:  Your experience is individual.  It isn't necessary to need/want a penis to be a man.  Plenty of trans men are non-op (top and/or bottom surgery). 

[robokot]

If we could have a fully-functioning, natural male penis, I think most transmen would want one. 

Thanks Quicksand, that's exactly how I feel.

Maybe part of the reason I'm not really bothered about not having a penis is becuase I'm mostly anxious over thing's I've
already got, like those completelly useless chest appendages.

As far as I'm concered I'm already a guy and I will only change my body enough to feel comfortable with it.

[Elijah3291]

well you are in luck because bottom surgery for FTM's isnt as advanced as it is for MTF's.  (I am not bashing on any guy who wants bottom surgery, just saying its not as advanced)

just because you don't desire a penis, doesn't make you less trans.  me, yeah I would love a real penis, that doesnt make me more trans then you.  I also have accepted the reality that i wont ever have a real penis.

testosterone has made me feel less dysphoric about not having a bio penis, because I have my own flesh, which acts a lot like a penis, just smaller

[Maga Girl]

You are, I don't want a vagina also (ok i want but... you understand me...)

[dmx]

have you ever met a MAAB person (that is not MTF trans or androgyne) that said "yeah I don't really care if I have a dick or not. i don't really want one."?

Word. Exactly what I was thinking...

[Matthew J. F]

Not having a penis does not make you less of a man. I am trans man and having bottom surgery is not on my list, although I have thought about it in the past. A lot of things must be in reconsideration as anything could happen while in surgery. The doctor can mess with your sensation nerves that causes you to not have any feeling in that area at all, and that is what I fear the most. I would LOVE to have a penis thought. Sometimes when I look at myself I often say "What the hell happen in the womb that gave me this?!??!"

I don't mean to disrespect anyone here who had bottom surgery but after seeing some of the photos of bottom surgery It's safe to say that the penis does not look realistic at all, as what Quicksand said, and I honestly don't want to be saving up a lot of money just so I can have an unrealistic penis.

[Windmill]

Just jumping on the bandwagon...I concur with everyone here about not wanting a penis not making you less of a man.  At this point it's not very practical (no disrespect) because of the iffi-ness of the procedure and its limitations in terms of functionality and sensation, but this aside, just not wanting a penis cause you don't want a penis is completely cool and dude-ly too.  I've actually known quite a number of bio-born and identified women who didn't want to have a vagina and they certainly didn't feel or identify as anything other than a woman or less like they were less of a woman.  You are what you are and identify as

[chloe23]

I agree Windmill

[RyGuy]

Source please?  You've mentioned this several times (in other posts).  I still cannot find any source to back up those statements.  I've checked the DSM-IV and the WPATH SOC.

To the OP:  Your experience is individual.  It isn't necessary to need/want a penis to be a man.  Plenty of trans men are non-op (top and/or bottom surgery).

http://www.genderpsychology.org/transsexual/benjamin_gd.html

his terminology applies to transwomen, so replace estrogen with testosterone, etc. types five and six are what im referring to, as the harry benjamin school of thought says true transsexuals desire surgery.

for the record, I don't care what you do or don't do with your genitalia. I'm just providing you with some of the most common medical information there is on trans people. you may not agree with it, but many of your doctors were probably taught to.