Mainly for those of you who desperately want kids and banked sperm

[~RoadToTrista~]

I'm just really stressed right now. As some of you know, having kids is really important to me. My brother and his wife had a miscarriage, and that was kind of upsetting. I'm stuck fantasizing about becoming pregnant, and it's just depressing me. My biggest concern from my transitioning is sperm banking, I know it might be more than I can finantially handle, it might not even work, I don't know what will happen to it if I move out of the country for awhile, and I can't even discuss it with my dad or anyone because I'm not out yet.

And my therapist appointment isn't for another 9 days, ugh.

[AbraCadabra]

Honey,
sperm bank!
It helped me some over this, not having my own baby (in my tummy).
I got one son.
Also at YOUR age... your sperm should be fresh as a June morning and last some time.

Alternative? My ts friend is now planning, her gay sis will be acting to be her surrogate.
My friend just got engaged to be married, age 24.

Maybe you have willing and able sis?

Axelle

[madirocks]

I don't see my option there! But, I suppose we have to deal with the sad truth.

Honestly I might not even sperm bank because that's not what I want either. I may just end up adopting.

[~RoadToTrista~]

@Axelle: Unfortunately I have no sisters, in the US I have a niece but she's a Jehovah's Witness so.... I doubt she'll be up for it lol. But thanks cause I've never heard any successful banking stories from transsexuals. ^.^

I'm srry Madi what's your option? >.<

[jillian]

sperm banking isnt to bad.
However to use the sperm to impregnate cost about 15-30 K in USD

[Sarah_aus]

Not sure what to vote here, so I voted Transsexual, I would have banked if there was anything to bank, alas it wasn't to be :S

[azSam]

Trista. I'm in the exact same boat. My brother and his wife just had a baby about 2 months ago. Everytime I see her, I can't help but feel jealousy. I'd give just about anything to have a baby of my own.

I think it may be more emotionally stressful to have all of the parts, but still unable to bear a child. But there are alternative ways to become pregnant. There are still a lot of bonuses to being an infertile ciswoman that I think I'd take.

I've pretty much accepted the fact - albeit grudgingly - that I will have to adopt a child. I will love and care for my adopted child all the same as if they were my own.

[madirocks]

@Axelle: Unfortunately I have no sisters, in the US I have a niece but she's a Jehovah's Witness so.... I doubt she'll be up for it lol. But thanks cause I've never heard any successful banking stories from transsexuals. ^.^

I'm srry Madi what's your option? >.<

Oh sorry, I was just being silly. I wouldn't pick either of those though. I think one of the biggest upsets is that I can't get pregnant. So I'd rather just adopt. But I can totally understand why some would want to sperm bank.

[kae m]

I don't see my option there! But, I suppose we have to deal with the sad truth.

Honestly I might not even sperm bank because that's not what I want either. I may just end up adopting.

That's how I feel. I know I'll adopt when I'm ready to start a family, there really aren't any other options I'm comfortable with. Surrogacy maybe could have worked, but if it isn't mine exactly I think I would feel too much resentment or jealousy, which I know is horrible but I don't even want to deal with that...and who knows how a future father would feel about it

I looked into banking but decided to just let it go rather than put myself through all that.

I get so ridiculously jealous of the two women I work with who just had babies...stupid useless biological clock

[~RoadToTrista~]

sperm banking isnt to bad.
However to use the sperm to impregnate cost about 15-30 K in USD

I heard that's the case but right now we seem to be really tight on money. Guess I'll be looking into a job >.<

That's how I feel. I know I'll adopt when I'm ready to start a family, there really aren't any other options I'm comfortable with. Surrogacy maybe could have worked, but if it isn't mine exactly I think I would feel too much resentment or jealousy, which I know is horrible but I don't even want to deal with that...and who knows how a future father would feel about it

I looked into banking but decided to just let it go rather than put myself through all that.

I get so ridiculously jealous of the two women I work with who just had babies...stupid useless biological clock

It does seem like it's a lot to handle, and since I like guys that does complicate things. :3

Trista. I'm in the exact same boat. My brother and his wife just had a baby about 2 months ago. Everytime I see her, I can't help but feel jealousy. I'd give just about anything to have a baby of my own.

I think it may be more emotionally stressful to have all of the parts, but still unable to bear a child. But there are alternative ways to become pregnant. There are still a lot of bonuses to being an infertile ciswoman that I think I'd take.

I've pretty much accepted the fact - albeit grudgingly - that I will have to adopt a child. I will love and care for my adopted child all the same as if they were my own.

I pictured myself being infertile and it just seems so emotionally painful, I definitely think I would choose being transsexual over being infertile and cis, but I'd definitely adopt if there was no other way. Good luck adopting.

[JungianZoe]

I pictured myself being infertile and it just seems so emotionally painful

It's something I try not to think about in my own life because it almost always makes me cry if I do.  Found I was completely infertile when I got tested before starting HRT, and my infertility was probably the result of years of being extremely underweight.  What really makes me cry the most is when I think about how I did it to myself.  How I wasn't strong enough to beat anorexia for far too many years.  But I did beat it, and for that I'm proud.

I had fully planned on banking some just in case because I love children more than just about anything.

[Naturally Blonde]

Even long before I ever started on HRT I was firing blanks, so I've never been able to have kids. Sometimes it's heartbreaking, especially when others talk about their families and their children. As I get older it gets worse and those who have managed to have children are so lucky.

[LilKittyCatZoey]

sweeti i did i won't lie for me who hates the thought of using my penis it was hard but i did it now money wise to store its like 6USD a month. and just do it its safer that way

my true hope is if i find a boy i love he has a sister because her egg will have the same genes as his sperm and if i love a girl well then i will be super jealous she gets to be pregnant but will still have a child

[Naturally Blonde]

sweeti i did i won't lie for me who hates the thought of using my penis it was hard but i did it now money wise to store its like 6USD a month. and just do it its safer that way

That's well and good for those who at one time in their lives were or still are able to produce sperm. Some of us like me were never able to produce sperm years before we ever started on HRT.

[LilKittyCatZoey]

That's well and good for those who at one time in their lives were able to produce sperm. Some of us like me were not able to produce sperm long before we ever started on HRT.

you sound like your angry at me for no reason i am only helping trista not trying to upset anyone ...

[Raya]

That's well and good for those who at one time in their lives were or still are able to produce sperm. Some of us like me were never able to produce sperm years before we ever started on HRT.

*delurks*

I've thought about that, myself. To be honest, half the reason I'm looking into storing my own sperm is to learn which group I belong to. I'm young, but I know enough not to take my fertility for granted.

*relurks*

[LifeInNeon]

@RoadToTrista: I hear you on the pregnancy thing. I banked (and apparently won the facility's top count of the month) and I feel better for it, and I have friends who offered to act as donor surrogates during the conversation in which I came out to them. So I got lucky there. But it doesn't do much for that wish.

What helped me was knowing that with the right hormone regimen, breast feeding is still possible. As painful and laborious as that can be, and as annoying as most cis women find it, I will gladly take it as a consolation prize if its the best that can be done.

[Joelene9]

  I have always wanted children.  I even woke up in the night with my inner voice saying "Why aren't you married?" and "Where are your children?".  GID and the politics and policies of the time was what prevented me to seek help after the late'70s.  I was lucky enough to have one of my sisters that let me take her boys out camping and get them out of her hair for awhile.  All of the nieces from another sibling were out of the state though.  I did play the good uncle to all of my nieces and nephews, this was one of the things that kept me sane.
  Banking sperm was one of the options I was mulling, but at that time, most people thought it was a Frankenstein thing and there were legal ramifications especially if the surrogate wanted to keep the baby.  It was messy. 
  Joelene 

[LilKittyCatZoey]

@RoadToTrista: I hear you on the pregnancy thing. I banked (and apparently won the facility's top count of the month) and I feel better for it, and I have friends who offered to act as donor surrogates during the conversation in which I came out to them. So I got lucky there. But it doesn't do much for that wish.

What helped me was knowing that with the right hormone regimen, breast feeding is still possible. As painful and laborious as that can be, and as annoying as most cis women find it, I will gladly take it as a consolation prize if its the best that can be done.

i was wondering that ! wow i love that i really wanted that i will no doubt breast feed my child

[~RoadToTrista~]

That seems kind of weird. Not the breast feeding but, like, if it's different milk from ciswomen.