well accept you for your own good.

[Elsa.G]

So today i was having a chat with my family (mother, sisters and dad) and they have come to the conclusion that they are accepting of me even though they have been very reluctant and even upset about the transition. i was very happy up until my sister mentioned that even though i am not a woman they will treat me as such because they feel that it would be beneficial for my mental health. I asked for her to explain further and she said "we know you are not a woman, but if it makes you feel better for people to call you one and see you as one than we are ok with that because we want you to be happy, even though we all know that you arent really a woman... if you want to pretend to be one for the rest of your life than so be it" now i was a little bit confused at first to be honest but with further explanation i discovered that my family and friends dont believe that i am a woman, just someone with mental issues that cannot be resolved and that they agree to treat me as a woman for my own "mental health" they see it as no more than some charade and my sister even went as far to say that if i get srs im taking my "delusion to the extreme". Im very distressed that i am seen as someone that has a mental disorder instead of what i truly am. My dad went on to explain that there is no way that my body is a birth defect because it's all healthy and intact. My sister's and mom went on to explain that just because i wear girls clothes and make up that doesnt make me a woman and that i never will be but they are going to accept me for who i am for my own good but in their eyes im still their son and brother

[MarinaM]

Didn't you give them the pile of information regarding the transsexual brain? Gotta go into these things with your guns drawn.

Here's some info: http://www.hemingways.org/GIDinfo/research.htm

[Elsa.G]

Didn't you give them the pile of information regarding the transsexual brain? Gotta go into these things with your guns drawn.

Here's some info: http://www.hemingways.org/GIDinfo/research.htm

i have actually, their argument is that these things are simply "theories' and not actual established proof 

[Gravity Girl]

Look at it this way...it may not be a happy victory for you, but it's not a defeat. Their reasoning may be flawed but they are accepting you...they will eventually come to understand that you are female, though i won't lie...that could take a while. just stick at it.

[JungianZoe]

i have actually, their argument is that these things are simply "theories' and not actual established proof 

Almost everything in the sciences is a theory because science opens itself to inspection and correction.  And everything related to transsexualism will remain a theory until an empirical test can be conducted: can they create a transgender baby?  Can the experiment be replicated using a successful experiment's methodology?  Can you reverse the condition and bring it back?

Of course not!  For starters, such an experiment would be highly unethical.  While I wouldn't say that there's not a biologist unscrupulous enough to try, no established research team with an ethics committee would undergo (or be allowed to undergo) an experiment of this nature.  They'd be creating a human being with a condition that causes a great deal of anguish and has a high suicide rate.  As for a procedure to reverse it?  Could you imagine the backlash if they tried to do that to us, then perhaps to gays, then perhaps to anyone else they think "needs" fixing once the biological root of the problem is found?  I'd wager a majority of people would have difficulty accepting this scientific overreach.

Would your family be open to a discussion of this nature?

[apple pie]

Absolutely nothing is actually ever proved in science.

Everything in science is just theory—not just almost everything, but absolutely everything. Scientists observe the world, make up a theory about something, and then test it against their observations... if they match up at least 99.9999% of the time or so it becomes an accepted scientific theory. But nothing in science is ever actually proved. Not Newton's laws nor E=mc². If a theory matches real world observations for 500 years without a single exception, that still does NOT prove it. Why? Because if that did prove it, then you could say for example one can prove that no whole number is equal to zero, because you could pick an infinite number of whole numbers so that none of them would be equal to zero...

So yes indeed, everything about transsexuals is "just" theory too. But if they would only believe something is true if it's proved, then the only things they should be believing would be conditional statements such as "if A is a whole number greater than zero, then it is not equal to zero"...

[azSam]

This thread kind of got off the main subject a little too quickly.

Look at it this way...it may not be a happy victory for you, but it's not a defeat. Their reasoning may be flawed but they are accepting you...they will eventually come to understand that you are female, though i won't lie...that could take a while. just stick at it.

Exactly. Just stick with it, this is a HUUUUUGE step forward, if they're willing to bend that much, it shouldn't take much more to get them to support you the rest of the way.

On a side note, your title uses "well" in it, instead of "we'll", and that confused me for the greater part of 15 seconds.

[LilKittyCatZoey]

omg after first reading this i decide i would see for myself and found out its true for a few ppl in my life to ! wow it feels horrible my  heart out there for you sweetie

[Forever21Chic]

So today i was having a chat with my family (mother, sisters and dad) and they have come to the conclusion that they are accepting of me even though they have been very reluctant and even upset about the transition. i was very happy up until my sister mentioned that even though i am not a woman they will treat me as such because they feel that it would be beneficial for my mental health. I asked for her to explain further and she said "we know you are not a woman, but if it makes you feel better for people to call you one and see you as one than we are ok with that because we want you to be happy, even though we all know that you arent really a woman... if you want to pretend to be one for the rest of your life than so be it" now i was a little bit confused at first to be honest but with further explanation i discovered that my family and friends dont believe that i am a woman, just someone with mental issues that cannot be resolved and that they agree to treat me as a woman for my own "mental health" they see it as no more than some charade and my sister even went as far to say that if i get srs im taking my "delusion to the extreme". Im very distressed that i am seen as someone that has a mental disorder instead of what i truly am. My dad went on to explain that there is no way that my body is a birth defect because it's all healthy and intact. My sister's and mom went on to explain that just because i wear girls clothes and make up that doesnt make me a woman and that i never will be but they are going to accept me for who i am for my own good but in their eyes im still their son and brother

     Elsa i understand what you're going throu, my family acted the same way when i tried to transition the first time at age 19. They looked at it as a mental breakdown and i was referred to as "crazy" behind my back, to them i would always be a male no matter what i did. DO NOT let this discourge you, some people especially family just cannot understand nor accept this. This is your life not theirs and you know what is best for you, if they give you trouble about this then breaking ties with them might be the only option. That might seem harsh but sometimes it's the only thing you can do.

      What ever you do...do NOT consider detransition because of pressure from your family and friends, i did & i regret that decision every waking day of my life. You're still young and have a bright future ahead of you, hang in there it does get better with time. 

[Renate]

Did you point out that if they are going to truly treat you as a woman
that they should keep their stupid misgivings to themselves?

[MarinaM]

I was going to say something similar, proofs are for mathematicians, the rest of us get to live in theory.