SHHHHH..... II

[ativan]

Perhaps the most important thing we bring to another person is the silence in us, not the sort of silence that is filled with unspoken criticism or hard withdrawal. The sort of silence that is a place of refuge, of rest, of acceptance of someone as they are. We are all hungry for this other silence. It is hard to find. In its presence we can remember something beyond the moment, a strength on which to build a life. Silence is a place of great power and healing. ~Rachel Naomi Remen

[ZaidaZadkiel]

People talk too much to say too little.

[foosnark]

Music is the space between the notes.  (I always loved applying that to things that aren't music.)

[ativan]

I own the spaces between stations on the radio. KVAN... 'Nothing but static 24Hrs a Day'

[ativan]

People talk too much to say too little.

And some just Babble about nothing.

[Taka]

you're so right about that. i once had a friend whom i could just be with. no need to say a single words, the other's presence was healing in itself. unfortunately he moved really far away, it was a huge loss to me. after that it took years before i found another friend who was even better, but things got complicated for me because i fell for her

and now i'm living with parents who never had a single speck of understanding for anything. all they do is talk about how i should be instead of trying to get to know me. just like they've always done. i wish some people knew when to shut up, words aren't really all that necessary for people to understand each other and some times all they do are build walls between us

[Pica Pica]

Parents always find it hardest anyway - imagine how inextricably linked to them you are in their minds - it's amazing they ever let a child out the house.

As for silence, as our mate Sammy J said, (actually, further research says this could be attributable to a few people)

"Tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than open one's mouth and remove all doubt."

as it is, those of us who know that it is impossible for people to not think you are a fool, we speak up.

[Taka]

i don't care about being taken for a fool, but i have learned that at times i could even be taken for a douche if i don't mind my words when women are around. so in some cases it really is better to just stay silent

as for parenting i don't believe in tying down the kids. i want my daughter to become a happy and independent person capable of making her own decisions, and i know that if i start pushing my own expectations onto her or making decisions for her that won't happen. she's so different from me that there's no way i could know what's best for her, even if i have an idea of what would be bad

[ativan]

I have two daughters, both middle teens now. Never push, just gently nudge if needed. Let them make theier own desicions, after you have discussed it with them. Help them with making decisions. Never punish them for anything directly, let them know the reasons instead. Let them know they did wrong by your disapointment, but always through your love in with it. And be their chearleader in everything they do. Always make a point of telling them you love them at least once a day just out of the blue. Hugs go a long way too.
I have watched them excel to national champions several times in diferent but similar disaplines. One is in college now instead of tenth grade. The other I imagine she will still be a straight a student and loved by everyone, she works hard in what she wants to do, she'll get there. I have no doubts about that. Teach your Children well.

Ativan