First time I've been on here in months...

[flux_capacitor]

Transition is going very slowly; it's a bit frustrating.  I haven't done anything physical (hormones/surgery) and I probably won't for at least another semester, although I'm hoping I'll end up starting hormones before the Fall semester is over.  I actually ended up screwing up last semester because I skipped so many classes, mainly due to people perceiving me as a guy and being called by my old name (so I came out to my professors at the beginning of this semester).  I'm basically completely out of the closet now, but I'm still a very male-perceived individual by most people.  I haven't really tried working on my voice or passing very much, probably because I honestly don't believe I can pass.  I might work on that more now.  Is anybody else finding their gender transition to be very slow and frustrating?

[azSam]

I came out in 08. I didn't do anything significant in my transition until 2010, when I started HRT. Even then, it took me another 8 months to go out. However, after that, when I went out for my first time, it started snowballing. I went full time that same week, I started laser a couple of months later, I got my name change a couple of months after that.

All in the span of a year from when I started HRT, I'm virtually finished with my transition with the exception of my surgery, which I'm working towards now. I'm working at Disney, and their full time insurance does cover the surgery, so I am going to do that as soon as possible.

You just have to stick with it, be patient. Let things happen when they happen. If you try to rush things along, you may end up crashing, and that can be far more devastating. It took me 2 years to do anything significant in my transition, but once it finally got started, it went quickly, and it went very smoothly.

[Annah]

welcome back!

I know you probably get this a lot, but if you don't work on your voice or try to "pass" or "blend in" people will most likely assume you are of the male gender. It's not just you...if I didn't try to blend in and look how I feel towards my gender identity I would have a helluva time to. Transitioning is never a race but if you are skipping classes and failing or doing bad in your courses because you have a hard time being identified as male it can be a tricky situation.....since college is probably the most important step in your life if you wish to pursue a professional job.

I wish you well in school. Be blessed tho! Sometimes transitioning in college is the best place. If you feel you must, transfer to another school after you start working on your appearance to get a fresh start!

[flux_capacitor]

@Samantharz:

I couldn't rush things if I tried 

It seems like I'm actually going about doing a lot of the social things first (coming out, going by my real name, changing my name) and later moving on to the physical things.  If only my campus medical center would do HRT.  When it comes to full-time... I'm working on presenting in a more feminine fashion in public, but really I'm just kind of doing whatever.  I've always been a bit iffy about the entire concept of full-time anyway

@Annah:

You're absolutely right about making more effort about passing and all that.  I just sometimes feel like that would be bowing down to the pressure to be a certain way, plus it feels like a pointless effort most of the time.  Eh, I'm working on it though :3

Transferring to a new school sounds like an interesting idea; I almost definitely would in a while if it weren't for the friends I've cultivated here!  For a college in the Bible Belt we have a wonderful group of queer and even transgender folks ^_^

[Annah]

yeah, society can be a tricky place...and a complicated one!

On one hand you do not want to succumb to the pressures of conformity and what people expect from you when it comes to gender presentation but on the other hand, one can become extremely frustrated when that society will perceive one as male because "certain roles" seems to not have been met or that there seems to be certain "pre qualifiers" to what a woman should act, feel, or look.

Most important thing is to be yourself! I've seen girls try to change their hobbies to fit a more feminine approach to feel more girly but when you look at the whole scheme of things they're not any real hobbies that would define a male or female gender. I know a lot of girls who love football and trucks!

[flux_capacitor]

They changed their hobbies? O.o Interesting.  I'm a bit of a weirdo so I don't expect to ever fit any expectations but I suppose I would like to pass. Eh, time to get out my voice recorder and junk.

[Princess of Hearts]

I was completely in the closet at university and I know the horror of being automatically perceived as male.   I very nearly went down the same road as you I missed a lecture here and a lecture there and decided that I was too 'ill' to attend a tutorial/practical there.    I caught myself in time and I decided to push myself for all I was worth instead of trying to avoid the above situations.    I made sure that I didn't miss a single lecture tutorial again and I never did throughout 4 years.   Try and turn something negative into something positive if it is at all possible.   I don't know what I would have done if the university had given me a 'withdraw'.