Susan's Place Logo

News:

Visit our Discord server  and Wiki

Main Menu

Be still my creeping skin...

Started by Nemo, August 28, 2011, 05:31:41 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Nemo

Okay, wasn't sure where to put this, but the first post of this nature I made was here, so here goes.

First off, this is in reference to the thread here: https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,73528.msg501623.html#msg501623 - if you haven't already read it, do that first.

Done that? Okay, here we go...

* Nemo draws breath

It's been over a year since that little incident. I've seen him on and off at church, we've had the odd little chat "Hi, how are you" etc., and all's been well. I saw him tonight, we chatted a bit more. Had to keep reminding him that I'm not a woman, that if I was I wouldn't be doing this in the first place, and eventually he seemed to get it. Went outside after a while since he smokes and it's also a lot quieter, he mentioned feeling suicidal and spoke a little about it, which I was glad for.

Then he asked if I'd go back with him, to "make sure he didn't hurt himself." Alarm bells were starting to sound already and I subsequently turned him down, suggesting instead he spoke to someone more able to help him. He was saying things like helping the needy since I'm Christian and all.. I knew full well what he was doing and stood my ground. He settled for hanging out for a little while outside church before we walked off. Although as we walked down the stairs, he started saying how he was "struggling with his sexuality and might in fact be bisexual."

Warning! Warning!

"Oh, okay," I politely acknowledged, managing to conceal my misgivings. He may have been truthful, but it sounds way too suspect to me - more like he still sees me as a girl and is just trying to make it seem otherwise for my sake.

So, as we're walking off he asks the typical questions I've come to expect when in need of some Trans 101. I cut him a bit of slack for reasons mentioned in linked post and explained as best as I was happy with. Then he starts saying how he's attracted to me... and that he'd like to have sex with me. His words.

I was as honest with him as he was me; I had to tell him a few times that no, I'm not comfortable with the idea, no it won't make me feel any better, but he eventually let up and we went our separate ways. I heaved a big sigh of relief at getting away from the situation, but also apprehension.

This guy only lives a few streets away. I'm waiting for my housemate/landlord to get back from his weekend break so I can tell him about this latest development, and that I'm currently not feeling safe living so close to this guy. I'm typing this partly to offload so I can sleep, but also partly for CYA purposes in case this gets ugly. It may all come to nothing, but I'm starting to get a little freaked out now - please God, don't let this turn into a stalker case :S


New blog in progress - when I conquer my writer's block :P
  •  

Vincent E.S.

Creeper!

Is anyone close to you in person aware of what this guy's been doing/acting like?

-worried hugs-
  •  

justmeinoz

Sounds like time to find a new Church, as far away as possible from him for a start.

Karen.
"Don't ask me, it was on fire when I lay down on it"
  •  

BunnyBee

This has 'bad' written all over it, especially since he hasn't let go after a year.  Trust your instincts.  I'm glad you have some support to help keep you safe.  Very creepy.
  •  

Nemo

#4
Quote from: Vincent  E.S. on August 28, 2011, 07:09:32 PM
Is anyone close to you in person aware of what this guy's been doing/acting like?

Like I said, housemate/landlord person knows about the first part - he'll know about this when he gets back from his break. Maybe sometime this evening *shrug* Plus he knows this guy too, which is a help.

Quote from: justmeinoz on August 28, 2011, 10:17:20 PM
Sounds like time to find a new Church, as far away as possible from him for a start.

I've actually been going to a different one for a while - I hadn't been to this one for a few weeks, just drop in most weeks to see old friends. Typically when I next visit I get this :-\ And it's when a new series of sermons starts that actually piques my interest - good job I can follow online instead.

Update:

Spoke to housemate (who I'll refer to as D) about it. Turns out this guy's done this kind of thing before to others - even to D, who's a conservative straight guy. Told me to talk to someone in church about it ASAP (next chance I have will be Wed, which isn't too bad), not just for my sake, but he's proving to be a real problem and could get banned from there.

Now I just have to hope he doesn't turn up at my other church. If he does I'll be having words with the vicar there real quick.


New blog in progress - when I conquer my writer's block :P
  •  

Nemo

Update #2:

Reported it to my group on Wed, and it turns out he's followed people home before. Not what I wanted to hear. Was advised to approach vicar on Sunday (since they can't directly help), so turned up at church early for the occasion - only to find him sitting in the foyer when I got there. He beckoned me over, I waved a dismissing hand as I kept walking, more determined than ever to talk to said vicar about this problem - incidentally, she's also the one who told me that "by becoming a man I'm saying no to other men", but to be honest that was the last thing on my mind at this point.

She said she'd have a word with him and mentioned that he needs to be banned - I hope to God something happens about this by next week, 'cause - well, if you can be bothered to read it, I let off a lot of steam about this week in this thread.

He's really pissing me off now. If this keeps up I'll be paying the police a visit.


New blog in progress - when I conquer my writer's block :P
  •  

BunnyBee

I'm glad you have been taking action and getting other people involved.  It freaks me out that people like this exist.
  •  

Cindy

Be careful,
He may escalate when banned or spoken to by the vicar. Be ready to go to the police for a restraining order if possible, or talk to them anyway to express your concerns before anything has a chance to happen.

Take Care

Cindy
  •  

Nemo

Quote from: Cindy James on September 08, 2011, 02:37:51 AM
Be careful,
He may escalate when banned or spoken to by the vicar. Be ready to go to the police for a restraining order if possible, or talk to them anyway to express your concerns before anything has a chance to happen.

Take Care

Cindy

Apparently he's been banned from church before. But when she asked if she should mention speaking on my behalf, I told her no for this very reason. I was actually looking up the local police station online yesterday and entering details into my Blackberry just in case.. :S


New blog in progress - when I conquer my writer's block :P
  •