i'm not passing

[Preston]

Right now, I'm passing about 30% of the time. Which sucks! I need to make a change. I was going to shave my head, but someone said my bone structure was giving me away.. Any thoughts? I would REALLY appreciate ANY advice you guys have.
Thanks! 

[JenJen2011]

In another thread you stated you were new to all of this so I assume you are just starting your transition? I could be wrong. In any case, have you started HRT? Just be patient. Give it some time. I find that FTM's tend to pass more than MTF's. And if that's you in the avatar, you're quite handsome.

[Nygeel]

30% isn't that bad. Do you find you're misgendered in places for adults? If so it could be that most see you as a young guy but with an age minimum it's harder to be seen as male. Voice tips some people off...could be many things.

[GentlemanRDP]

Firstly, don't shave your head. That's usually not a good idea for us special type o' boys.
Plus, from what I see of your picture, the hair looks fine.

Not passing can come from a lot of different variables.

Hair, facial structure, voice, body structure, clothing, mannerisms, speech, even the way that we walk.

You might want to take a look at all of these things individually and see what might lead people into misreading you.
Or the next time that you get falsely identified ask, "What makes you think I'm a girl?"

[Natkat]

I also think it depends on the location and such, if your around alot of boyish girls and so on then it easy to be mistaken, and if your not good at telling back your a guy as soon the mistake hits then people also asume your a girl because your didnt answer back..

I do the same and I notice its kinda like, if one person say "she" to me and I do nothing about it then the other guys think.. "oh okay then its a she" and everyone starts calling me that.

[Renard]

Your avatar picture looks like a pass to me. I've heard that squaring you hairline can give the illusion of a squarer jaw, but I don't remember where I heard that, nor have I tried it myself so I'm not sure how true it is though.

[bojangles]

I think your friends make a good point about your bone structure. Not much ya can do about that except try to conceal it with bigger clothes and more muscle. Can be hard pre T, I know.

My eye goes directly to the earring in your avatar photo...doesn't really help, imo.

[Preston]

And if that's you in the avatar, you're quite handsome.

Thank you!! 

You have all given really great advice!

I've heard that squaring you hairline can give the illusion of a squarer jaw,

i've heard that too.


I am new and I haven't started HRT yet, so I'm doing the best I can, lol. Thanks again, everyone!!

[Wil Najera]

another thing that helps is attitude. sometimes just the way you present yourself can make people see a man. i've always walked like a guy, so that's never been an issue for me. and now that i'm begining my transition, it's a huge plus for passing.

[Da Monkey]

I wouldn't be too worried, especially if you plan to start T. I didn't pass too well pre-T but by 3 months on it I couldn't even use my ID with my birth name.

I had to give up wearing a lot of clothes that seemed 'lesbian-y' at first until I passed more.  I've found that over the years I've just sort of grew into myself more. That helps too.