I think it's almost time.

[Karlee]

So I've been struggling with questioning my gender for most of my life. As far back as I can remember, I recall knowing that something wasn't quite right.

I feel like my life is almost falling apart. The stresses of not only this, but also my new job, new living arrangements and just life in general. I think it is coming to the time where I have to get the pressure of me and start taking steps to improving my life, and coming out is part of it.

I am petrified of coming out, purely and simply because I don't know how people are going to take it. My parent's both come from highly religious families and have beliefs engraved into them from those days. Nowadays they aren't religious, but they still have some of their beliefs. My dad is part of a gun club. Everyone around me speaks of the LGBT community in a derogatory way, and I have to just put up with it and bite my tongue. I know that the news of my questioning my gender and going against social norms will not go down very well. And above all else, my girlfriend. I am living with her and still have a significant amount of time left on the lease, and the last thing I want to do is make things awkward.

I want to try therapy. I need to save up money and see a therapist and get some answers. I need to see progress.

Has anyone got any thoughts or suggestions for me? I'd love to hear them!

Thanks.

Love,
Karlee.x

[kristin?]

I know how you feel. I come from a very religious family, and I know they won't take it well when they eventually find out :\
I've told 4 people so far, my girlfriend and 2 roommates (my best friend and his girlfriend) that I'm living with, and my little sister. As you might have guessed, the one I was most nervous about was my girlfriend, because I love her and would hate for her to not accept me for who I want to be, but she's been supportive. I told her about a week before my birthday, and she surprised me with my own eyeliner & shadow pencils, and got me 2 pairs of girls' skinny jeans from the mall 😀 I'm don't think she's comfortable with the idea of me going all the way (at least not yet), but it meant a lot that I didn't have to hide that I've been dressing up from her, and I can pretty much wear whatever I want around her now

I'm not saying your situation will be the same, but things could turn out much better than you expect. I'd definitely tread carefully with your parents though, I know how crazy some ultra-religious people can get :\

[Karlee]

That's how I feel. I feel like it's a certainty that I'll loose people that I love. 

That's amazing, Kristin! I am so glad that they're supportive of you. 🙂 I feel like my girlfriend will be accepting and supportive to me (we're strong like that) but still, you can never be 100% certain about anything in this world, can you?

Thanks for your advice! I think I want to come out to my girlfriend first and then take it from there.

Love,
Karlee.x

[justmeinoz]

All I can offer Karlee, is let her know you love her and that is why you want to be open with her.  One important thing to stress to your girlfriend would be that it is a slow process, and there won't be any overnight changes.

Hope it goes well for both of you.

Karen.

[Karlee]

That's a good way of looking and thinking about it, Karen. I think if I can show people that I want to be open and honest with them over such a personal and big thing in my life and that I need their support, it may turn out okay.

I am definitely not going to go out day one as her girlfriend, but ease her into it.

Thank you, Karen, for your help.

Love,
Karlee.x