Susan's Place Logo

News:

According to Google Analytics 25,259,719 users made visits accounting for 140,758,117 Pageviews since December 2006

Main Menu

T for Androgyns/3rd gender/non-binary/etc

Started by Sevan, September 15, 2011, 07:02:42 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Sevan

While I am not some sort of...expert on the topic...I wanted some information to be out there. When I first started looking I did hear whispers about female bodied persons seeking transition to...not entirely male. I heard about people who knew someone who knew someone who one time was on "low dose T" for androgyns. But...that was about all the info I could find and looking back...most of that was wrong information.

I know we can't discuss dosages here, and that's fine. I won't be discussing that. Everyone is different, reacts differently and must seek professional advice from their prescribing doctor. Super duper important.

First thing I'd like to talk about in this is something I only just learned. (though once I learned it...it's kinda one of those..."oh duh." things.) Female born persons don't have testosterone blockers in their body. So...when we take testosterone, our levels appear much higher than those of male bodied persons. (as described to me by my doctor.) This is an ok thing. This actually makes it a little bit difficult to take something one might consider a "low dose".

When I started T (a little less than two years ago) I did so thinking I was taking a "lose dose". When I had my blood levels checked...I was shocked to find that based on my blood work, it was NOT a low dose for me. I was in fact, in full male/FtM range. However...I found the dosage to be very therapeutic. I freaked out about that and had a bit of a "what does this mean!? Am I actually FtM now that I'm in this range of T, and finding it therapeutic!?" and with thearpy and some time, therapy and thinking it through...no. That doesn't make me male. My identity is still as androgyn as ever.

There are many choices in dosage and prescriptions of testosterone. Many new ones have recently come out, which hopefully over time will make them cheaper. (as many are not cheap...) I have personally had experience with a few different types.

The first I was put on was Testim: http://testim.com/?MOC=TSM101&gclid=CMTs6JG2oKsCFYYZQgod7lkEiQ which is an alcohol based gel. It's applied to the chest (not breasts) and upper arms. You rub it in until you feel it's dry, let it set for a few mins and then get dressed as normal. It comes in small "daily application" tubes. The tubes are kind of nice because if you travel you can take just what you need, rather than a whole big bottle or what have you. I put "daily application" in quotes because really...it's between you and your doctor as to what is right for you. I've been given the freedom to play with proper dosage for me. We've experimented with half tube daily, and other combinations of full tube one day, half tube the next, so on and so forth. I did so under careful watch of my doctor.

Just to try the injectable version of T I did go on it for a short term. I thought it would be really nice to not have to think about it for two weeks, rather than daily application. I'm not a huge fan of shots, and my hormones were all over the place while on it so I really didn't like that. I prefer a more steady, even feeling...which the gel gives me. Daily application equals no trough. That's a pretty nice thing.

Recently my dr wanted me to try a new product that's come out. (he's pretty fond of whatever is new..."ooohhh shiny!" Axiron: http://www.axiron.com/Pages/index.aspx?WT.srch=1 I tried it and...I *personally* don't like it. It's an odd application method. It comes in a large lotion type bottle and it comes with a rubber tipped cup that's shaped like deodorant. It goes in your under arms. You put your deodorant like normal, wait two mins and then pump this alcohol based liquid that's very watery into the cup. Then you apply the contents of the cup to your underarm(s). I couldn't quite get the hang of it somehow...and kept dripping it down my sides and onto the floor. I requested going back to Testim. (as that just works best for me. I'm sure the other types work wonderfully for some.)

The reason I feel that "low dose" is a sort of mirage is that even if you are able to keep your testosterone levels low...it just prolongs the changes that will be taking place. (as I understand it) though having low levels of testosterone limits what your body can do. (masculation wise)

My voice has dropped considerably. I am now a low bass singing voice. (I started at a low alto...for what that's worth.) I do have facial hair and need to shave, though it's still rather invisible...it's finally starting to darken up around my chin. I don't really have much for body hair though I'm starting to get some. My clit has grown as many transmen report. My sex drive amped up considerably. (oh lord did it..) My moods evened out, my GID lessened, my muscles bulk up easier, I seem more "vulcan" in my approach to thinks and insistence that all things should be logic focused (it's actually the running joke in this house) and I can't say that's testosterone based but it's so different from who I used to be (highly emotional to annoying levels...seriously. Annoying.) that I bring it up because changes in hormones can have unexpected consequences...positive or negative. I'm sure I've changed in ways I can't even see or notice about myself.

However...with all that...it's been one of the best things I've done for myself. I didn't hear any experiences from other androgyns (or the like) and so I wanted to put this here so others can hear my experience.
I'm also the spouse to the fabulous Mrs. Cynthialee.


  •  

ativan

And then there's me. Born bio male, decades of confusion and regrets. I have memories that are lost. But, there are things, real things, people, records from various places that all show me who I was and what I did. I hated every minute of my day, on days I just didn't like me...I thought I was being happy. Turns out that it took my daughters to help me understand myself better. 16 yrs ago, my oldest was born. You couldn't take her away from me.
Then I found out her mother could. She had a weapon that actually scared me. The loss of my daughters (just under 2yrs apart). It was on and off, about on as much as off. 2002 was when the complete breakdown happened. It's been a long road coming back, lots of relapse. But I also had to always be taking the long hard look at myself. Denial is such a rotten thing to do to yourself. Everyone of us has a story and so do I.

Jan 2010 I found this place, I had already been seeing a therapist for about six months. My first six months as a member of this Forum were strange to me. I was finding out things that did and then did not make sense. But I soaked up a lot of information while piss'n people off and myself for doing it.

I don't remember how it went exactly, but the idea of low dose androgen blockers had crossed my information pass more than once. I realized that if I could just take a low dose of spironolactane.... I got recommended to see the people at the 'Program in Human Sexuality/Center for Sexual Health.'
PHS...I had heard a little bad and a little good about them, and then found out they were well aware of 'low dose' therapy. It's been 29 wks today that I have been on Spiro. What a difference! There is a bright light at the end of the tunnel now. I did start screwing around with my meds a short time ago and although I don't really remember a few days there, I found out that 'Oh yeah' I am indeed on the lowest dose of everything. I am the poster boy for Axis II, by the way. Been that way for to many yrs now, but meds and therapy have kept me out of hospitals for two yrs now.

But the addition of Spiro is a separate thing. It doesn't matter if I am or I am not taking other meds. It stands alone. I cut my dose down to 1/4 of what I was taking. Didn't take but a couple days for my testosterone to push the worst of me back up front of everything. Went to 1/2 my dose and I was only half way there. Back to my usual dose and I am just fine. I have lost some of my upper body strength, but I am also working out twice a week now, so I intend to regain as much as I can, or more. For me, more is better. Some hair loss on my legs and the rest is finer, which I like and my facial hair has slowed down to less than half. Less shaving which of course I like. No Boobs or even moobs, but I can tell that a little more soft tissue is there, fat I suppose. But I have far more muscle on my chest than any fat. I gained weight even though I tried not to. I'm in the middle of my BMI so it's not a big deal except I would like to lose 21 more Lbs. Thats the weight of a case of pop. I already had that down to another case before the spiro, but it's stable and I am regaining muscle mass, so there. If you're overweight, just think about how many cases or twelve pks of pop you're caring around, up and down stairs. Wonder why you have High blood pressure?

My sex drive is down to a tolerable level, pretty much normal for 59 yrs old. An erection? Not likely. But, the plumbing still works, just not as fast and easy as before. Sexual attraction is the same, just less dwelling on it.

I'm actually happy. The change is noticed by everyone. I have gotten or heard of compliments. That's what started the messing with my axisII meds. Always a bad idea, I'm sorry. I just wanted to see if maybe the Spiro had lessened my need for some of them. Wrong.

My GID (soon to be called GI in the new DSM at a store near you in 2013) is all but gone. I still see the psychologist at PHS and it's always a part of discussion with my regular therapist. But I can even tell I am different in a good way without it.

Just wanted to say, from a bio male Androgyn's point of view. It's not that low of a dosage, but without the Estrogen, it's kind of like a low dose. Not enough to make large changes physically, but it does make a huge difference in attitude...for the better.

Ativan
  •