Hello , My chosen name is Rossalynne , my birth name is immaterial . When I was born , my parents , allready had my older brother fred to carry on the family name . And my mother had a strong desire to have a girl , so she started dressing me as a girl . But , when I started kindergarten , due to my birth certificate saying I was male , I was forced to wear boy clothes .
I could only be me at home . My grandparents were cool with me being a girl too . My grandfather was a doctor , and was willing to make the arrangements , to get me a complete sex change as a child . But my father refused , thinking I might change my mind and want to be aboy later on in life . Oh how wrong he was .
I was allways happiest as Rossalynne . When I was forced to be a boy , it allways felt so wrong . I loved going out with my grandparents , to shop at Macy's department store , for dresses , shoes , and assorted under garments . Being a girl is all I've ever wanted to be . I allways felt so special and feminine .
At nine years old my sister Jean was born . At first I was excited , another girl in the family for me to share my life with .
But , mom crushed my heart ,when she brought jean home . She told me that since she now had a real girl , I would have
to be a boy from then on . She never realised , that a persons gender role is set , between birth and six years old . Changing now , would never work .
As I grew , I would cross dress in secret , these were the only times , I truly felt normal . Everytime my mother caught me in a dress , she would try to beat the urge out of me . Then she joined the penticostal church , and things got progressively worse . Between the church praying to cast the demon of homosexuality out of me , and mothers beatings ,
my crossdressing was kept to a bare minimum .
My grandfather , was still going to help me become , a complete woman , but , he passed away before I reached eighteen . And my mother , to stop me , gave my inheritance from grandfather , to the church for the mission fields .
She said if I was going to change , what god had given me , I would do it alone .
So I have spent my life trying to aquire the neccessary funds to make the transition . Everytime I get close , something comes up that cleans me out . Now at fifty one years old , and on dissability due to health , I will never realise my dream .
So I do what I can , the majority of the time ,I wear my dresses . The only time I wear mens clothes , is when I have to see my doctor , Because he wont see me if I am dressed up .
I hope I haven't depressed anyone with my journey . It's just that life is life , and not everybodies trip through it is full
of rainbows and butterflies .
