Having a hard time...

[Kaylie]

I feel like I just need to write this down at least, instead of having it bounce around in my head all day like usual. I've been seeing a therapist, going to LGBTQ support group, and trying to be mindful of my thoughts to figure out who I am but it seems like its getting me nowhere but more confused and distressed  I know for sure that for the most of the time I just play the male role because its gets me through life with the least resistance, but for a while now it just seems so wrong and uncomfortable. I know that in time I will figure it out but I feel like its taking forever and in the meantime its just really getting to me.

Anyways just kind of wanted to rant a little 

[bojangles]

I just play the male role because its gets me through life with the least resistance, but for a while now it just seems so wrong and uncomfortable.

You are definitely not the only one who has done this.
Hang in there.

[Alicia]

The key word is time. A support group or therapist should make you think of things you never thought about before, so you do get confused until you work through them. But once you do, you may have avoided a lesson learned the hard way and be better prepared going forward. Your own experiences can help others who haven't thought about what you already finished.

[Kaylie]

Thanks Alicia and bojangles  Just talking about it helps, I know I just have to stick it out and let time take its course. And it always helps knowing I'm not the only one going through this too!

[skm4441]

Kaylie, I am going through similar situation right now... Going to see my therapist and am considering attending a support group called Gender Variant... Who else isn't gong through similar situation right now? 

Anyways, I am biologically female but I identify more towards androygous/masculine rather than a female... My therapist wanted me to make sure that I am NOT struggling with my body image instead of wanting to change my sex because I have not exactly fully accepted my body yet.  So yeah, I am kind of in a rut right now.  Thank godness for support here.

[Katie138]

I'm so sorry you have to go through that, but don't give up okay? it will become clear when it's meant to. And until it does, just try to stay strong.

[Plague]

My Dear Kaylie:
I Think the world of you please rant anytime I promise to listen LOL (I mean read .) Now that's out of the way sister, please you are so smart. I well know as you that this mental stuff takes time; however we cannot let the walls close in on us.
(Push back be Strong) I know you will succeed at what ever you put your mind to; so continue to put up the good fight its worth it! the end result will far out way weigh the journey you taken... I promise. Sweetie all we have is time (some more than others.)
As you have been doing look to help others and you will figure things out 
Love ya Peace out 
PS hope this helps a little        

[Felix]

I played the wrong role for a long time. It seemed like the right thing to do, and the alternative looked so difficult. Hang on and find ways to be yourself. Keep hanging around Susan's. Don't sacrifice any more than you have to.

[Lexicaligari]

As most here will tell you: It will get better! We all face these moments, and I'm here to tell you-- Don't sweat it. Don't forget the difference between Surviving and Thriving. Even a vegetable can survive, but Thriving is worth the effort every time.

[Kaylie]

Thanks you guys are great! thats why I love this place  I know I have to just try and stay positive and bide my time until I can figure it all out, no one ever said it was easy indeed!

[Plague]

Kaylie you are the great one! Yes you are right good things happen to those who wait......Which means have Patience LOL 
Love ya Peace out