You need to take care of yourself and get into a more supportive environment. The best way to do that, imo, is to try to find trans-positive or lgbtq health centre or community centre in your area and pick up a counselor there. I understand that your wife is important to you and everything, but your own happiness should be important to her. You need to sit down and tell her how depressed you are. I'm going to go out on a limb and assume you're wife identifies as a lesbian, and if so she isn't the first to freak out when her partner comes out as a transguy. For her it might also be an issue of visibility within your relationship and worrying about what it will mean for her as a lesbian.
If I were you I'd do my best to find some kind of support group and attend. And after a while of getting support for yourself, try to bring your wife into some kind of counseling or trans/SO support group for the both of you.
Edit, btw, awesome video. Thanks for sharing that.
