Victory Is Mine!

[MaxAloysius]

I used the men's!!!

Ah, I know a lot of these threads crop up all of the time, but there's been such little forward progress for me lately that I just couldn't help but add to them. For some reason, using the men's toilets has been a major issue for me; it was something that I just couldn't bring myself to do. I'm not entirely sure what I was afraid of, but I couldn't ever stomach enough courage to just do it. Then I went and visited my aunt who had to go to the hospital every day for cancer treatment, and at the hospital was able to use their single cubicle men's toilet without it triggering my 'toilet fear' as I've now dubbed it.

After that I managed to force myself into using a public toilet twice over about three months, once in an airport after midnight, and once in a mall after ten, so both times there weren't any other people around. Generally speaking I've managed to (painfully) live without using public toilets. Yesterday though I had a nine and a half hour shift at work, and my bladder is good, but not that good. It was lunch time and I just had to go (peak hour at the mall! Bleugh!) and somehow being tired and angry and annoyed at my job I yelled at myself in my head and just did it! Argued with myself the whole way in, sat down fighting the panick, and then had to talk my bladder back into needing to go to the toilet!

I feel great now though! There were a lot of guys in there, but none of them gave me any trouble, and at seven and a half months on T I think my visit was more than overdue!

[Kreuzfidel]

Congrats, mate!  That is a big step forward and a right of passage!  Do you think you'll have an easier time trying it again now that you've done it?

[Devin87]

Awesome!  I remember my first (and last) time using a men's bathroom.  I chose a truck stop in Arkansas, which was probably the worse choice I could make beyond a biker bar...  But there were two other guys in there and they didn't pay me any mind.  I just went into the stall, peed as quietly as I could onto the front porcelain and then sat there for a few minutes so they'd think I was taking a dump.  They didn't look twice.  I was flying high for days after that even though I haven't tried it again since.  I tend to do what you're doing now and avoid public restrooms at all cost.  When I'm not binding sometimes I'll go into the lady's room and stick out my chest as a sort of entrance badge or something.  But I always get funny looks in there and one time when I had my buzz cut I even had a couple girls get half way through the door, see me washing my hands, and quickly leave again only to look at the sign on the door one more time and walk in confusedly.  And that was on a day I thought I wasn't passing, so that made me feel good.

Anyway, congrats, man!

[mm]

I try to avoid the men's when out, but I am in school all day 3 days/week so I have to go.  I am seen as one of the guys by most students who don't know my history.  I use a restroom in a building where there is little chance of seeing someone I know. After the first time and finding no one in there, it has gotten easier.  I still try to go when there is a likelyhood of there being very few in there.  I walk in and go directly to a stall and sit to pee trying to do it quietly.  I always wash my hands afterward. Many times the urinals are direct opposite the wash basins and you see the guys peeing there in the mirror when you washing.  Now I have no problem using the men's when I know there is very little chance of seeing someone who knows my history.  I am pre-t so still get my monthly bleeding so changing tampons has to be done very carefully, hopefully there is no one else there when I do.