I have one friend who has problems with getting the pronoun. I don't care so much when it's just us hanging out, but it's incredibly embaraasing with strangers, like waitstaff. I'm afraid to go out with him anywhere public because of the embaraasment. I mean, at the point that I'm way passable, it won't be such an issue, because then he'll look retarded. But at this point, once the wrong pronoun is used, it's a give-away for me. And that sends the wrong impression to that stranger - they won't know how to address me if my own friends aren't addressing me as a woman. It sort of invalidates everything that I'm trying to convey to people with my presentation. My presentation says, "Treat me like a woman" but my friend's actions say "Treat him like a man." Not happy! I wouldn't be so upset about it if he was making an effort, but I don't see one at all. I explained this to him, because he was acting upset that I was upset, and he backed off a bit. But, basically, you're totally in the right for feeling how you do about your "friends." If they really were your friends, they would respect what you are doing and try to support you how a friend should. I think you'd be better off looking for new friends - the one's that you'll find that accept you for you will be far better for you than hanging onto the old friends who are hanging onto the old you.
