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What r ur main defenses to be continued accepted by a straight guy once he knows

Started by Sad Girl, February 12, 2012, 04:35:26 AM

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Sad Girl

Sisters please share your what are you main defense mechanism, wordings or phrasing once a STRICT BIGOT HOMOPHOBIC STRAIGHT GUY knows you are trans, so that he continues accepting you.

The cases can be related to pure sexual encounters or love relationships.

My main defenses and wordings are always:

1. Hey I'm STILL the same person I was that you met from the beginning, so please don't treat me like I'm suddenly a completely different person now.

2. So you're such a hypocrite. You were saying I'm gorgeous blah blah blah and you want me desperately, now what happened? So all your desire for me was all fake anyway?

3. I'm NOT a man. CHANGE YOUR F****** WAY OF PERCEIVING. I may have been born as such but I NEVER requested to be born as such. I'm a girl 100% in my heart, mind and soul and I'm fighting to synchronize by body with my mind and I have appearance of a woman and I'm gonna operate soon(this is for pre-ops only).

4. If you didn't know anything, you would have continued doing it with me anyway with so much passion so just make as if you still don't know it and imagine I'm a girl.

5. You don't need to feel ashamed, having done it with me doesn't mean you're gay. You're still a straight guy cos me I'm NOT gay, I have a completely feminine appearance and I'm a complete woman in my soul.

6. If you really love me as you pretended from the beginning, you NEED to continue accept me as I am otherwise it means you were purely attracted only to my physiques and not to my heart and personality.

I HATE saying what I am from the beginning cos most the 'strict straight guys' reject once they know what you are and strangely it's the ones who are the most handsome who are the most bigots and strict on their heterosexuality. I prefer die being beaten by a strict straight guy than doing it with a '->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-' yucks! (By the way me too I was tricked by ->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s LOL! As they know I hate ->-bleeped-<-s they pretend to be straights then during encounters they suddenly start trying to touch my most hated part, LOL! )


And you, what's your defense to be continued to be accepted once a straight bigot know what you are?

  •  

AbraCadabra

No defence... as defence = defensive, and I really do not like being defensive about who I am as a person.

NEVER, try to explain those medical issues to any trans-phobic, male or female. It's a waste of time. They already have made up there minds - and WE are NOT going to change it. In fact they are best ignored.
Done that, been there...

My 2 cents,
Axélle



Some say: "Free sex ruins everything..."
  •  

Re: Joyce

If you wanted a poodle, why did you buy a kitten?

      You can't change a kitten into a poodle any more than you can change a bigot into a fair-minded person.

      This idea of looking for love and affection involves finding a person who will accept you and love you.   They cannot change you and you cannot change them.

       Once they have revealed to you that they are a bigot, leave quickly, especially if you're a pre-op.   As long as you have those identifying bits, you run the risk of being beaten at best or killed at worst.

       Stop trying to change people.   Do you think they might change you back into being a straight guy yourself?   Think about this from that perspective, because that's the reality of this particular issue.

       Ain't nobody changing nuthin'.   Look for love in different places.
  •  

Annah

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 12, 2012, 04:35:26 AM
Sisters please share your what are you main defense mechanism, wordings or phrasing once a STRICT BIGOT HOMOPHOBIC STRAIGHT GUY knows you are trans, so that he continues accepting you.


I am not attracted to Bigoted homophobic men to begin with so I would never have to come up with a "reason."  If I found a man attractive who finds me attractive but isn't sure about dating me because I am trans, I put the cards on the table. He can take it or leave it.

But yeah, I don't even entertain the idea or even trying to convince a bigoted homophobe. I cannot stand hearing them on television, radio, etc. I have no desire to date one.
  •  

Gadgett

Well first off I don't deal with such people. I have more important things to do with my time...

But, to answer your question I have 2 lines I use.

1 I use mostly cause as I said. if they are going to pass judgement on me like that I have no sympathy for them.
"Why does this bother you so much? Do you want to f*** me or something like that but you can't wrap your brain around the fact that you like one type of woman instead of another? Sounds like your the one with the issue."

But if you want to be nicer about it...
"I'm the same person you've known and loved for years you just learned something new about me. It's no different that learning that I can rollerblade."
Scott Kelley: You guys are here on a good day.
Zak Bagans: What's that suppost to mean?
Scott Kelley: The building will talk to you today."
  •  

Alainaluvsu

To dream of the person you would like to be is to waste the person you are.



  •  

Rabbit

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 12, 2012, 04:35:26 AM
I prefer die being beaten by a strict straight guy than doing it with a '->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-' yucks!

The straight guy rejecting you as you play your little game isn't the only one with issues.....

Straight guy rejects you because you have the trans label...and you reject others because they have the "->-bleeped-<-" label... and on and on the world goes.

I have a feeling you are going to end up just another statistical number of trans people who end up horribly abused because they are disconnected from reality :/
  •  

annette

Defending your existence? come on, you're kidding.
You can tell him very polite, F*** off and stop bothering me or i call the cops.
You are who you are and they have to deal with it or leave ( don't slam with the doors please)
You're not craving for a judgement of a bigot, are you?
  •  

Tazia of the Omineca

I ask a question before I tell anyone, "If I tell you something personal will you think any differently of me?"

Then I go from there, but usually if they don't ask I don't tell, I mean it's not important so long as we aren't "Together".
and if we are going to get "together" I would tell the guy before hand, since it would avert catastrophe earlier.

Kind of sucks when you run into people like that though. Though I admit, ->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s are equally worse in my opinion.
  •  

Stephe

Quote from: Rabbit on February 12, 2012, 04:33:53 PM
The straight guy rejecting you as you play your little game isn't the only one with issues.....

Straight guy rejects you because you have the trans label...and you reject others because they have the "->-bleeped-<-" label... and on and on the world goes.

I have a feeling you are going to end up just another statistical number of trans people who end up horribly abused because they are disconnected from reality :/

+1 for this honest post about reality, but the stat she is going to end up as, playing that game, is another dead TG. She's not gonna be asking for them to accept her, she is gonna be begging some homophobic bigot not to kill her.
  •  

Sad Girl

Quote from: Rabbit on February 12, 2012, 04:33:53 PM


Straight guy rejects you because you have the trans label...and you reject others because they have the "->-bleeped-<-" label... and on and on the world goes.

I reject ->-bleeped-<-s only if I know beforehand but if I discover it once on bed, I get deceived but despite I hate ->-bleeped-<-s, I'd never tell them get lost and interrupt all, I'd continue what I started on bed and the ->-bleeped-<- is super handsome I'd play blind and make as if I didn't know anything in my head. If I do it to others, I need to accept being done it me too and it happened MANY times. Karma is such a bitch but as you sow, so shall you reap and I assume it.
  •  

Amalina

I wouldn't want to put myself into such a dangerous position in the first place. Intentionally deceiving someone is not my idea of a date. I'll admit also the dangers this presents scare the hell out of me so I've probably thought on this too much but still.

As others have said if you need to try convincing the person then you probably already lost the battle and at that point you could get seriously hurt. Not to mention all it does is cement in that persons warped mind that the rest of us are dishonest and shouldn't ever be trusted.

Look at it this way. If you walk up to someone that you know probably would not like to be punched in the face. Then you punch them in the face, only to find out they really aren't into that. Nothing you say is going to make them see your point, it's based off a trust that they didn't expect to be punched in the face yet were betrayed.

Same thing, except with bigots you are hitting them in their most emotionally charged and fragile part of them. Their masculinity, because like it or not they will not see you as they should, they are ignorant and will just see a betrayal, and that's when they will possibly feel the need to prove their manliness and take it out on you. No thanks.

Honesty may get you less dates and you may have to be picky to avoid ->-bleeped-<-s, but I would bet it's safer and more reliable than deception.

Tori

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 12, 2012, 04:35:26 AM
Sisters please share your what are you main defense mechanism, wordings or phrasing once a STRICT BIGOT HOMOPHOBIC STRAIGHT GUY knows you are trans, so that he continues accepting you.

The cases can be related to pure sexual encounters or love relationships.

My main defenses and wordings are always:

1. Hey I'm STILL the same person I was that you met from the beginning, so please don't treat me like I'm suddenly a completely different person now.

2. So you're such a hypocrite. You were saying I'm gorgeous blah blah blah and you want me desperately, now what happened? So all your desire for me was all fake anyway?

3. I'm NOT a man. CHANGE YOUR F****** WAY OF PERCEIVING. I may have been born as such but I NEVER requested to be born as such. I'm a girl 100% in my heart, mind and soul and I'm fighting to synchronize by body with my mind and I have appearance of a woman and I'm gonna operate soon(this is for pre-ops only).

4. If you didn't know anything, you would have continued doing it with me anyway with so much passion so just make as if you still don't know it and imagine I'm a girl.

5. You don't need to feel ashamed, having done it with me doesn't mean you're gay. You're still a straight guy cos me I'm NOT gay, I have a completely feminine appearance and I'm a complete woman in my soul.

6. If you really love me as you pretended from the beginning, you NEED to continue accept me as I am otherwise it means you were purely attracted only to my physiques and not to my heart and personality.

I HATE saying what I am from the beginning cos most the 'strict straight guys' reject once they know what you are and strangely it's the ones who are the most handsome who are the most bigots and strict on their heterosexuality. I prefer die being beaten by a strict straight guy than doing it with a '->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-' yucks! (By the way me too I was tricked by ->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s LOL! As they know I hate ->-bleeped-<-s they pretend to be straights then during encounters they suddenly start trying to touch my most hated part, LOL! )


And you, what's your defense to be continued to be accepted once a straight bigot know what you are?

Eff it.

You like alphas.

Trip safe. Trip smart.

Tori


  •  

Sad Girl

Quote from: Amalina on February 13, 2012, 01:21:54 AM
I wouldn't want to put myself into such a dangerous position in the first place. Intentionally deceiving someone is not my idea of a date. I'll admit also the dangers this presents scare the hell out of me so I've probably thought on this too much but still.

As others have said if you need to try convincing the person then you probably already lost the battle and at that point you could get seriously hurt. Not to mention all it does is cement in that persons warped mind that the rest of us are dishonest and shouldn't ever be trusted.

Look at it this way. If you walk up to someone that you know probably would not like to be punched in the face. Then you punch them in the face, only to find out they really aren't into that. Nothing you say is going to make them see your point, it's based off a trust that they didn't expect to be punched in the face yet were betrayed.

Same thing, except with bigots you are hitting them in their most emotionally charged and fragile part of them. Their masculinity, because like it or not they will not see you as they should, they are ignorant and will just see a betrayal, and that's when they will possibly feel the need to prove their manliness and take it out on you. No thanks.

Honesty may get you less dates and you may have to be picky to avoid ->-bleeped-<-s, but I would bet it's safer and more reliable than deception.

Of course I don't take any random man at once. And I read them first, face is a major factor of reading someone and at a glance I can know if it's that type of guy who can butcher me once he knows, to those, I avoid. Oh 'BETRAYAL' & 'LIES' are their BIGGEST excuses to get over you and make you feel guilty. But hey, it's never me who makes the 1st step. So I always DEFLECT it back on them telling them IT'S THEIR PROBLEM IF THEY ARE BLIND NOT TO DIFFERENTIATE between a bio and trans woman. At the most, I'd pretend I thought that they knew from the beginning when I very know well NOT. This is what these bigots deserve ok, they are SOOOOOOOOOOOO DISCRIMINATIVE towards us and HYPOCRITE. They approach to YOU FIRST and tell you you're gorgeous blah blah blah, I wanna make it with you then when they know you're suddenly a completely different person. Well they should ASSUME and eat their hypocrisy up. And to be honest as much I love being only with straight guys I also secretly hate them cos these jerks made me suffer all my life, worse when I was still untransitioned. 100% pure rejection, driving me to suicide several times and ruining a quarter of my life. Well the 'once a GUY' is now a 'DIVA' and is slamming down all men who made her suffer 1 by 1. Many who rejected me when I was still a guy are now down kneeling and licking my feet to get back with me. Well, too late! A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH!  >:-)

PS: And sis, what you're telling? Go with ->-bleeped-<-s it's safer? Brrrrrrrrrr, they just know how to touch our most hated part + do oral to us, the worst when they want us to top them. They make me feel so 'unwoman'. And telling to go with ->-bleeped-<-s cos it's safer it's like telling a strict straight guy to go with trannies cos bio women are more difficult to get and don't like anal sex. LOL!  ;D
  •  

Amalina

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 13, 2012, 06:36:37 AM
Of course I don't take any random man at once. And I read them first, face is a major factor of reading someone and at a glance I can know if it's that type of guy who can butcher me once he knows, to those, I avoid. Oh 'BETRAYAL' & 'LIES' are their BIGGEST excuses to get over you and make you feel guilty. But hey, it's never me who makes the 1st step. So I always DEFLECT it back on them telling them IT'S THEIR PROBLEM IF THEY ARE BLIND NOT TO DIFFERENTIATE between a bio and trans woman. At the most, I'd pretend I thought that they knew from the beginning when I very know well NOT. This is what these bigots deserve ok, they are SOOOOOOOOOOOO DISCRIMINATIVE towards us and HYPOCRITE. They approach to YOU FIRST and tell you you're gorgeous blah blah blah, I wanna make it with you then when they know you're suddenly a completely different person. Well they should ASSUME and eat their hypocrisy up. And to be honest as much I love being only with straight guys I also secretly hate them cos these jerks made me suffer all my life, worse when I was still untransitioned. 100% pure rejection, driving me to suicide several times and ruining a quarter of my life. Well the 'once a GUY' is now a 'DIVA' and is slamming down all men who made her suffer 1 by 1. Many who rejected me when I was still a guy are now down kneeling and licking my feet to get back with me. Well, too late! A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH!  >:-)

I'm sorry but not matter how much you want to defend and excuse it, you are still talking about blatantly deceiving people. Otherwise you wouldn't need to come up with "defenses" for when they find out, by doing so you admit that there is a chance they are a bigot and you won't be able to read them proper all the time. Of course in a perfect world they wouldn't be hypocrites and bigots but sadly that is not our world. These people we will run into and have to deal with. All I'm saying is that the shock approach of them finding out at the wrong time and then trying to turn it on them sounds like a really flawed way to convince them to stop being so hateful, and as I tried to point out opens you up to physical harm if you can't shame them into seeing why they are wrong.

Also not all straight guys are like that, some understand why you are not a male,  and will have no problems with you. There have been members here that are in relationships with straight men that aren't bigots. I know these men are a minority but they are out there. Just need to find those to keep safe.

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 13, 2012, 06:36:37 AM
PS: And sis, what you're telling? Go with ->-bleeped-<-s it's safer? Brrrrrrrrrr, they just know how to touch our most hated part + do oral to us, the worst when they want us to top them. They make me feel so 'unwoman'. And telling to go with ->-bleeped-<-s cos it's safer it's like telling a strict straight guy to go with trannies cos bio women are more difficult to get and don't like anal sex. LOL!  ;D

Okay, I think you should read a little better what I actually said. My last sentence clearly said to be picky to AVOID ->-bleeped-<-s. I talked about honesty being safer to find the good guys. Nowhere have I said to date ->-bleeped-<-s, and no way would I ever suggest it. So yeah, not what I said, thanks.

Also one last thing. If I'm not mistaken isn't this thread against the rules? Posts about intentional deception. It seems Susan agrees mostly with my outlook on this.

Quote from: Susan on October 18, 2009, 02:59:24 AM
I will not tolerate anyone posting on this forum about tricking or otherwise intentionally deceiving people into committing acts that with informed consent they would not have participated in. Actions of that nature are highly immoral. Topics of this nature feed the hatred of those who would attack the transgender community. It is used as justification by Murders for the "gay panic" defenses. A violation of this rule will from this moment forth result in a permban, as people who engage in these types of actions are not welcome in this community.

Maybe it's an outdated rule but I would hope not.


Stephe

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 13, 2012, 06:36:37 AM
Well the 'once a GUY' is now a 'DIVA' and is slamming down all men who made her suffer 1 by 1.

This is NOT a positive way to live.. Like others have said, this game you are playing is a great path to end up dead.
  •  

Zarania

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 13, 2012, 06:36:37 AM
Of course I don't take any random man at once. And I read them first, face is a major factor of reading someone and at a glance I can know if it's that type of guy who can butcher me once he knows, to those, I avoid. Oh 'BETRAYAL' & 'LIES' are their BIGGEST excuses to get over you and make you feel guilty. But hey, it's never me who makes the 1st step. So I always DEFLECT it back on them telling them IT'S THEIR PROBLEM IF THEY ARE BLIND NOT TO DIFFERENTIATE between a bio and trans woman. At the most, I'd pretend I thought that they knew from the beginning when I very know well NOT. This is what these bigots deserve ok, they are SOOOOOOOOOOOO DISCRIMINATIVE towards us and HYPOCRITE. They approach to YOU FIRST and tell you you're gorgeous blah blah blah, I wanna make it with you then when they know you're suddenly a completely different person. Well they should ASSUME and eat their hypocrisy up. And to be honest as much I love being only with straight guys I also secretly hate them cos these jerks made me suffer all my life, worse when I was still untransitioned. 100% pure rejection, driving me to suicide several times and ruining a quarter of my life. Well the 'once a GUY' is now a 'DIVA' and is slamming down all men who made her suffer 1 by 1. Many who rejected me when I was still a guy are now down kneeling and licking my feet to get back with me. Well, too late! A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH!  >:-)

PS: And sis, what you're telling? Go with ->-bleeped-<-s it's safer? Brrrrrrrrrr, they just know how to touch our most hated part + do oral to us, the worst when they want us to top them. They make me feel so 'unwoman'. And telling to go with ->-bleeped-<-s cos it's safer it's like telling a strict straight guy to go with trannies cos bio women are more difficult to get and don't like anal sex. LOL!  ;D


"Well the 'once a GUY' is now a 'DIVA' and is slamming down all men who made her suffer 1 by 1."

i ->-bleeped-<-ing love you for this! ♥
  •  

Sad Girl

Quote from: Amalina on February 13, 2012, 03:38:32 PM

Also one last thing. If I'm not mistaken isn't this thread against the rules? Posts about intentional deception. It seems Susan agrees mostly with my outlook on this.

Maybe it's an outdated rule but I would hope not.

I didn't transgress any rule cos "I" don't have an agenda to go and deceive straights intentionally. I NEVER make the 1st step, it's always THEM who comes to me. So THEY need to ASSUME it cos THEY started it. And whether I wanna disclose whether I am trans or not is MY problem and business of NONE. I never say I am a biological woman but I don't say I am trans neither. There's a difference between LYING and NOT TELLING THE TRUTH.

And I have seen INFINITE posts where girls here are saying they went to a date but didn't tell the guy, afraid all turns sour. Others said they don't say yet cos they don't feel it's the right time yet to say. So in a sense these girls are 'tricking' straights too as are per your sayings and be banned too then?

And let me tell you 1 thing, after telling my 6 magic phrases posted above in the original post, 99.9% of the time they still CONTINUE having sex despite knowing what I am. In the beginning SHOCKED and disgusted but after I manage successfully to BRAINWASH them, they gradually starts digesting it and then they get back on track and continue. Just like me when I know one is ->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-, I will be shocked but I will continue still. Homophobic Bigot Straight guys REJECT trans when they KNOW from the beginning but once they are in the bath, they have already kissed you and got the taste of OUR EXCELLENT PERFORMANCE IN ORAL, they are not likely to backtrack anymore.

This thread has heated enough and I don't want to create more turmoil. This is my final reply here. Peace.
  •  

Amalina

I know you say you are done but going to post this reply anyways. I think you don't quite get that quote from Susan. Here's some of what you said.

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 12, 2012, 04:35:26 AM
Sisters please share your what are you main defense mechanism, wordings or phrasing once a STRICT BIGOT HOMOPHOBIC STRAIGHT GUY knows you are trans, so that he continues accepting you.

The cases can be related to pure sexual encounters or love relationships.

Pretty straight forward deception, as the rule states "I will not tolerate anyone posting on this forum about tricking or otherwise intentionally deceiving people into committing acts that with informed consent they would not have participated in."

Correct me if I'm wrong but you admit quite a bit that these men will reject you if they KNEW what they were getting into. Basically "informed consent" and this is more than just dating, you mention related to pure sexual encounters, just because you say "well they assumed" doesn't make you right. You show a lot of hostility like you enjoy entrapping them. Big difference between this and holding back the info and revealing before anything sexual which is what I've seen talked about mostly around here.

Sexual relations can be very emotional for people, pulling a fast one on someone is not fair no matter how wrong their views are and as said in the rule it just feeds their hatred of us as a whole.

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 12, 2012, 04:35:26 AM
4. If you didn't know anything, you would have continued doing it with me anyway with so much passion so just make as if you still don't know it and imagine I'm a girl.

5. You don't need to feel ashamed, having done it with me doesn't mean you're gay. You're still a straight guy cos me I'm NOT gay, I have a completely feminine appearance and I'm a complete woman in my soul.

Examples of committing acts without INFORMED consent.

Below is just more proof that it is intentional deception, you say you refuse because you know they will not stick around.

Quote from: Happy Girl on February 12, 2012, 04:35:26 AM
I HATE saying what I am from the beginning cos most the 'strict straight guys' reject once they know what you are and strangely it's the ones who are the most handsome who are the most bigots and strict on their heterosexuality.


All that is from your first post, not even getting into the rest of what you said.

If I wanted you banned I would of reported the post and not replied.

I was hoping to reach you at first to help, obviously you are convinced that since it seems to work you will be just fine. So sorry, was hoping to help. Even by pointing it out I was trying to help you NOT get banned. I don't want you banned.

I just find this discussion kind of sickening, I believe heavily in honesty and this goes pretty far away from being honest, and wanted to point out my thoughts.