Where do I fall?

[jacqueline_rose]

I am currently not able to pursue any treatments for myself due to my financial situation. Nor am I able to dress up due to my living arrangements. I am a woman inside, and deperatly want to stop having to go everywhere as a guy. I live with my family and will not quit college just to get out (an education is one of the most important things a person can have). But I can only get minimum wage work and my expenses even with financial aid are to much to do anything right now. I have another three years to go but honestly I just dont know what to do anymore. I need a therapist before I can start hormone treatments, but no insurance will cover me for that, and I cant afford one on my own. Im not asking for help with that (though i would be eternally gratefull. lol) but I dont know what my place is in our community. I am still physically male, and I want more than anything to be wholly female. I will make it happen later when I can, but for now who am I? How do I identify myself?

[Jamie D]

Jacqueline, you say you are in college.  Do you have access to a student health service or center on campus?

When I was in college I used my student health center privileges to seek counseling.

Your place in the community is that you are one of us.  It's that simple.  It doesn't matter how you present; it matters how you feel inside.  Right now you are trying to find ways to cope with your gender dysphoria.  I think that is where most of us started.

[justmeinoz]

From what you have posted it sounds like you are a girl, and will remain so, regardless of clothes or anything else.
The way I am feeling today I don't really feel qualified to advise anyone, but maybe you can get into the mindset that you are a really, really Butch girl, or find the local Genderqueer community.  They don't care about the details, just how you act as a person.
I am trying to find people like that in my own age group locally.

Karen.

[jacqueline_rose]

Thank you. ^.^

I am a part of our community, and I am an active supporter already, but the only counselors there are for helping you with academic problems or for substance or abuse problems. (the lgbt group im in has two advisors, both from the substance abuse program). And your right, they dont care how i define myself. They have been so kind and supportive of me, but its myself that I cant stand. I will try the student health services though. Thank you so much!

[JoanneB]

If ou do have insurance, most cover therapy... for depression. That is often how it gets coded. After who isn't depressed that's trans? 

[Brooke777]

From what you wrote, answering who you are is quite easy. You are a woman. It does not matter what you look like, or how you dress. The only thing that matters is your heart and mind.

I went to school for psychology. We often saw students from the school to provide them with some counseling. They always were screened before coming to us, but it was a free service that we provided. It was volunteer work, and did not affect our grade so those of us that participated did it because we wanted to help. Maybe your school has something similar.

[jacqueline_rose]

From what you wrote, answering who you are is quite easy. You are a woman. It does not matter what you look like, or how you dress. The only thing that matters is your heart and mind.

I went to school for psychology. We often saw students from the school to provide them with some counseling. They always were screened before coming to us, but it was a free service that we provided. It was volunteer work, and did not affect our grade so those of us that participated did it because we wanted to help. Maybe your school has something similar.

I will take a look. today I went to the counsilors office and while we had a good chat there wasn't much that they could do for me. Ive decided to start going to classes dressed the way that I want. My teachers dont mind (I asked them first out of respect, it is their class after all.) and I dont care what the other students think. I dont have insurance as Im barely affording my normal bills. I could probably start proffesional help if i cut my phone, but thats the only non essential bill I have and I use it for almost everything.
I am a woman. I know it. I just have to keep my spirits up.

[aprilrain]

Collage is probably the most accepting and liberal place you will ever experience. Be yourself if you want and whatever you do keep going to classes, get yourself a good career.