mid life transition

[changinglife]

Hi,
please help,
i'm just about to commence my transition and would like some advice on (Hormones verses Age verses Genes), ive heard and read that the later you transition the lesser the effects the hormones have on feminising the body and facial features. i have also read that this can vary from one person to another.
I am 43 years old, attractive looking ( not a really masculine face nor a feminine face ) and i am told my age looks more like 30 to 32 ( even had mid to late 20's said ) and hope to start HRT very soon but have concerns about passing 100% as a women in time which is especially important to my transition.

My question is, will my attractive looks without harsh masculine facial features as well as gene that have kept me youthful in looks, mind and bodyshape (34 - 31 - 33 ) help me to acheive a more feminine transition then the avarage guy of my age?

i'm not suggesting that there is a 100% right answer for this questions but feedback from the community with experience would be greatly apprecciated,

kind regards, changinglife

[Re: Joyce]

I've seen quite a number of very pretty transitioners who started later in life.  I think a lot of it is genes, to some extent.

      Regarding the "passing" part, I hate that word.  It implies that there is deception involved.   If you dislike your male bits, want your condition fixed once and for all, then accept in your heart that you are truly female.   Once you accept yourself truly in your heart, then you'll find that there is nothing for others to discover.   You'll be accepted as a female, because you are.

       If you want to keep those male parts and use them, then you are masquerading and passing will always concern you.   I don't care what you look like, you'll always be a man in a dress.

       Beauty involves a lot of little things and most women can be beautiful if they really want to and take the time and effort to do so.   Beauty starts in your heart and starts with loving yourself.   

[AbraCadabra]

I'm 65 and started transition 2 years back only.

I'm passing fine, there are always MANY opportunities NOT to pass... but what Joyce boldly said holds true, for me at least... including SRS.

If you KNOW what you are and be it... with no ifs and buts - who's to tell you otherwise?!

Axélle-Michélle

[lilacwoman]

to pass 100% you'd have to be born and brought up as a girl to know all the social graces. 
you didn't have that luck like most of us so better take yourself to the nearest dressing service for TVs and ask the women to go to town and make you as attractively female as possible  and see if you like the result.
you have to understand that passing is a lot more than appearance and you ca't know what your final apparance will be like as the hormones are unpredictable and a year in you may be delighted or despairing and thinking of surgery.

At some stage of transition we all have to step out the door and face the world and I have heard of people claiming to go from male one day to total female the next but I can't really believe it.

[AbraCadabra]

[clipped]
At some stage of transition we all have to step out the door and face the world and I have heard of people claiming to go from male one day to total female the next but I can't really believe it.

Well, I did just that, change from one day to the next. Period. That's me. Make a decision and go for it. It's called "jumping in the deep end" - one way learning how to swim.

I have followed some folks' procrastinations who kept/keep switching back and forth, back and forth, in the end they didn't know anymore if they were chicken, fish or beef.
Seriously confusing stuff IMHO.

But as always YMMV...

Axélle

[Catherine Sarah]

I've seen quite a number of very pretty transitioners who started later in life.  I think a lot of it is genes, to some extent.

      Regarding the "passing" part, I hate that word.  It implies that there is deception involved.   If you dislike your male bits, want your condition fixed once and for all, then accept in your heart that you are truly female.   Once you accept yourself truly in your heart, then you'll find that there is nothing for others to discover.   You'll be accepted as a female, because you are.       If you want to keep those male parts and use them, then you are masquerading and passing will always concern you.   I don't care what you look like, you'll always be a man in a dress.

       Beauty involves a lot of little things and most women can be beautiful if they really want to and take the time and effort to do so.   Beauty starts in your heart and starts with loving yourself.   

+1

What more can be said !!

Be safe, well and happy
Lotsa huggs
Catherine

[Melody Maia]

I started at mid-39 with a similar start as you describe. It did help greatly in my transition. I worked on a look at home for a bit and then went out once in TX before moving to FL to start my new life. There I went out a week before I realized I passed virtually immediately and went full time right away. So I was a boy one day and a girl the next. However, looking back at my boy pics I realize now how soft my features were. I looked rather like an FTM and was mistaken as such at many initial Trans group meetings in the early days when I went in boy mode. Expectation is everything. Today I pass at pretty much a 100% rate and my changes continue at about 17 months of HRT. Subtle changes, but important ones. You won't know what you are going to get until you try.

[Steffi]

At some stage of transition we all have to step out the door and face the world and I have heard of people claiming to go from male one day to total female the next but I can't really believe it.

I did too!
At the time, I had a beard and my crew-cut had grown out to about half an inch length.  All I had was a REALLY rubbish wig that came from a joke shop and cost about $6.  It was also jet black which was a ridiculous colour with my skin tone.
I had snapped - I was past caring what people thought.
I shaved off my beard, put on my crap wig and walked out of my front door.
I have never looked back.

Of course, in the first weeks I got a LOT of abuse and was read by everyone - but having started so low, the only way was up! 

Without wishing to sound harsh, there is an important question here that you need to answer as HONESTLY as possible. Do you want to be a woman or a model?

Most women are not beauty queens or models. I know it is important to look as nice as possible but beauty has nothing to do with 'passing' or blending in as female and living a female life. There are lots of quite ugly women who, nonetheless, are unquestionably female.

What I am getting at here is that if you NEED to transition then do so. What you end up looking like will be the luck of the genetic dice and they roll unpredictably. I  am not saying that you should not make the best of yourself or that you should not make an effort on your appearance. I just think you need to realise that transitioning is about being yourself however you look.

Beverley

Good advice well said.

[changinglife]

Hi everyone,

thankyou for your responses, please keep them comming, it apprecciated

just a short note about my intended transition,

i dont want anyone to think that i am so shallow that i'm only looking for beauty, voice and mannerisms from my transition,

i understand that the real beauty is inside where it has been the whole time and i have known this from a young age but i have lived my life since nineteen bringing up 3 girls,( now 23, 18 and 17) in a male/father role and i now desire my transition to be as womenly as possible so as to fit into everyone world as i should have done from the start and not to be sidelined because i dont fit in because of others perceptions.

i want to be all women with SRS completed within two years and only FFS considerations after 18months of HRT  and to have the confidence to take it to the world as a beautiful confident women both inside and out to live and fight for the things that i feel are important and that i believe in.

my inital question wasn't so much about would i be beautiful but more along the lines of how well will the effects of the HRT work on feminizing a 40+ face and body with good genes that isn't too maculine.

cheers

[rachl]

As with most things: it depends.

Everyone responds differently.

[Jillieann Rose]

Changinglife,
I was 59 when I started my hormone regiment.
Below is my before photo at age 56

This is me now Below about 2 years into hormones at 61 years young.

No FFS needed.

People have always said that I don't look my age.
Hope this helps answer your question.
Jillieann

[Catherine Sarah]

You look great Jillieann.

Just keep on, keeping on.

Huggs
Catherine

[Jillieann Rose]

Thanks Catherine.