Self image issues

[Siobhan]

Anyone else have major issues with the way you percieve your appearence?
For example I'm of the impression I'm hulking fat,and really ugly in general.
But others tell me otherwise, and I don't believe them.

Sometimes i'll be  looking at my feet thinking they are huge.but the truth is they are only a uk size 6  to 7. My hands that I think of as huge meat paddles...1 cm longer than a girl I know amd the same width...and shes   only 5'2

I do this with everything about myself! Especially my face,and it doesnt seem to matter what im told or the tape measure may say,my brain just won't accept im anything but big fat and repulsive.
Seriously it's like my brain is faulty, and it's always been that way making me want to hide in a dark corner forever.

[justmeinoz]

First off, don't look in any mirrors unless you are doing your hair or makeup.  We are our own worst enemies, so the less we look at ourselves the better. 
Secondly, cis-women do exactly the same thing.  At least we can tell ourselves it's because of a manufacturing fault.
If your hands are the same width as your friend's and 1 cm longer then they sound more feminine, to me.
If you are fit enough to get through your day easily, including climbing stairs, then you don't have to really worry about your weight too much, unless you have a health issue.

Karen.

[luna nyan]

Size 6-7 shoes!  That's petite in my book, you should see my feet!

In our community, it's very easy to become body dysmorphic and obsess over a part of our bodies regardless of whether it's fine or not.

If it's gotten to the stage where it is getting in the way of you getting on with life, then please talk to someone about it, there are things that can be done to help with getting over this.

[Maja.V]

I wear a women's size 10 shoes, have 17-ish inch shoulders and I've loads of loose skin from losing 64 pounds, still see myself as fat (and considering my tummy and thighs, I still am), and I consider myself overly ugly. So yes, I do have major self image issues.

[Amazon D]

I collect antiques and so far all my mirrors are worn badly and i can barely see myself in them so i do not look.

I HAVE A GREAT SELF IMAGE 

Your self image should be the person you are on the inside not the outside 

[Trans Truth]

Most women have self image problems I think. It's normal, but we all need to get over it.

[luna nyan]

Most women have self image problems I think. It's normal, but we all need to get over it.

The only problem is that for us, it's compounded because of our starting point.

[Siobhan]

Sigh...I know I should really find some friends,or a support group or something. Im just painfully shy with zero confidence and my head is really a mess. Makes me feel a little better im not the only one with self perception issues though.

[Kitty_Babe]

First off, don't look in any mirrors unless you are doing your hair or makeup.  We are our own worst enemies, so the less we look at ourselves the better. 
Secondly, cis-women do exactly the same thing.  At least we can tell ourselves it's because of a manufacturing fault.
If your hands are the same width as your friend's and 1 cm longer then they sound more feminine, to me.
If you are fit enough to get through your day easily, including climbing stairs, then you don't have to really worry about your weight too much, unless you have a health issue.

Karen.

LOL QFT - to that !  If this was Facebook I would 'Like' this post.

Yes, we all go through it, I had a malfunction quite publicly yesterday. Over my looks.. oh and by the way, if your a UK size 6-7 shoe size, then I HATE you !! 

I am a size 7-8 shoes size. Technically 7 and half, - but UK does not do that size.

[Siobhan]

It's all about the shoes with you gals

[Naturally Blonde]

Anyone else have major issues with the way you percieve your appearence?
For example I'm of the impression I'm hulking fat,and really ugly in general.
But others tell me otherwise, and I don't believe them.

Sometimes i'll be  looking at my feet thinking they are huge.but the truth is they are only a uk size 6  to 7. My hands that I think of as huge meat paddles...1 cm longer than a girl I know amd the same width...and shes   only 5'2

I do this with everything about myself! Especially my face,and it doesnt seem to matter what im told or the tape measure may say,my brain just won't accept im anything but big fat and repulsive.
Seriously it's like my brain is faulty, and it's always been that way making me want to hide in a dark corner forever.

I have similar problems. I have low self esteem and self image problems too. I'm also bothered by similar issues. My shoe size is ladies size 7 which isn't too bad but still bigger than the average female. I'm also 5' 7" in height which is still taller than many females in my area. I also have facial issues, mostly with my teeth which are crooked and look horrible. I should have worn a brace as a kid but in the U.K there isn't the care like there is the the USA about self image or cosmetic dentistry. I know it's going to cost a hell of lot of money to get my teeth done properly and it affects my confidence as they are now.

My body shape is wrong with most fat accumulating around the belly and not on the butt or legs and I wear more loose fitting clothes to cover up the fact. I think many of us have problems with transitioning as it's not as easy as you think no matter how close you think you are physically to a cis female.

[Stephanie_b]

Anyone else have major issues with the way you percieve your appearence?
For example I'm of the impression I'm hulking fat,and really ugly in general.
But others tell me otherwise, and I don't believe them.

Sometimes i'll be  looking at my feet thinking they are huge.but the truth is they are only a uk size 6  to 7. My hands that I think of as huge meat paddles...1 cm longer than a girl I know amd the same width...and shes   only 5'2

I do this with everything about myself! Especially my face,and it doesnt seem to matter what im told or the tape measure may say,my brain just won't accept im anything but big fat and repulsive.
Seriously it's like my brain is faulty, and it's always been that way making me want to hide in a dark corner forever.

Girl, I know how you feel...I think we all do.  We are our own worst enemies when it comes to being critical of our own appearances. 

It sounds like you had a good starting point, being rather petite.  I wish my feet were that small!  lol.  Mine are a size 6 men's atm, I dont know what that equates to in women's sizing yet.   

Just try to keep your head up and if anyone compliments your appearance, believe them. At least there are many cis women who are fat and ugly, I don't know if that helps.  But, I bet you are just being hard on yourself.

Heck, when I look in the mirror, all I see is a man-appalling!  I'm pre-transition and its depressing. 

[Siobhan]

Shoes are important. I like shoes. What kind do you wear Siobhan?

Beverley

Trainers...lol or mens shoes to work 
Ive only been on anti androgens for about 4 months and ive not come out, have no clothes,makeup or anything..too scared of never passing to even try.

[Naturally Blonde]

Trainers...lol or mens shoes to work 
Ive only been on anti androgens for about 4 months and ive not come out, have no clothes,makeup or anything..too scared of never passing to even try.

I've never worn men's shoes (not even before transition) but I always used to wear female trainers, jeans and t shirts. It's a good place to start and it makes the process more gradual than a complete radical image change.

[Siobhan]

I used to wear my gf's trainers lol...was'nt even my idea either honest

[Siobhan]

I don't think I'm that great looking, but I know I'm not butt ugly either and actually have a decent looking body so long as I'm wearing clothes, lol.

Lol...."your sexy and you know it"
You are,really.

[Stephanie_b]

NaturallyBlonde has it right. A gradual change works best so here are some simple tips.

1. Wear womens' jeans
2. Wear plain blouses, loose ones not tailored ones
3. Wear clear polish on your nails and let your nails grow a little
4. Start to moisturise after shaving and after a shower/bath.
5. Let your hair get longer

Start with that lot and get used to it. After a while wear a bracelet or an anklet and get used to that. These are very simple things that 99.99% of the population will NOT notice but they will build your confidence.

If you are in the UK shop at Asda because they have mixed gender changing rooms and the clothes are very, very cheap so as your body shape changes over the months you can update your wardrobe easily.

Beverley

I realized that was intended for the OP, but would that advice apply to me too?  I have bought some women's clothing just recently.  The problem I have is that if I wear the jeans...people are going to notice I think.  What do I do if people stare or make rude comments/laugh?

I would love to do as you suggested to the OP though

[Stephanie_b]

Well, the jeans are skinny with a mild kickflare, and the tops I bought are t-shirts which are not overly feminine.

About what I want to do?  All of the above.  I suppose I will try it soon, I just wish I had the hormones already, for me they help a lot but I will try it next week when I get paid and eat lunch at the only mall my city has.

I will make a nee thread for it after I try it out.
Thanks for the encouragement!

*hugs*,
Stephanie

[luna nyan]

Straight leg or regular fit jeans are not noticeable in my experience.  Depending on the cut they may not be particularly comfortable in the seat area.  And the pockets are next to non existent.

If you are really really worried why not star jeans only - I'd be very surprised if anyone notices

[Stephanie_b]

Straight leg or regular fit jeans are not noticeable in my experience.  Depending on the cut they may not be particularly comfortable in the seat area.  And the pockets are next to non existent.

If you are really really worried why not star jeans only - I'd be very surprised if anyone notices

Forgive me if this sounds dumb, but are star jeans a brand name?
Perhaps I should get some staight leg jeans, because my legs are definately 100% female looking, perhaps the only area that does not require change from the hrt.  I hope people won't notice too much, because I can't help the way my legs are shaped , nor the "wiggle" when I walk. I already get looked at funny while wearing guys jeans so I guess it won't hurt.  Lol