Somebody said something that I will never forget.

[Alainaluvsu]

Today I told my school director that I plan on going full time there starting April 16th. I'm going to school for cosmetology, and I will be on the floor with actual clients starting that date. I was on break with the rest of my class when I told them why I was seeing the school director (they've known I'm trans for a week or two... which none of them were surprised about at all). Why I asked permission or whatever was beyond a couple of them.

One of them said something that I will never forget... ever. "You shouldn't need to tell anybody what you are. You should just be you. If you're a girl, that'll show and it doesn't matter what you're wearing, if you're wearing makeup, none of that will make a difference. The teachers don't care, the students here don't care, and the customers wont care. You're just being yourself. I don't really think you had any reason to tell her anything."

Looking back on the past week or two, I see how right she is. Everyone on the cosmetology side knows I'm trans. I've been coming to school wearing makeup just about every day, wearing a bra (which makes my breasts very noticeable) and nobody has given me any crap about it at all. No students from the other courses have cared when they've seen me in the break room. I don't seem to stand out 1 little bit more than I did before.

But I think that statement is something that should be shared with everybody on this board. If you're a girl, you just are. When you're ready to come out, when you've established it to everyone who has known you as your birthed gender and they know in their own hearts that you are a girl... what you think will matter to the people you come across will not matter.

Thanks Kim. I know you don't even know these boards exist but I will carry your words to my grave. ILY

[AbraCadabra]

Well yes, THANK YOU Kim! :-)

Axélle
PS: one could only wish more folks would be of that mind-set.

[Keaira]

Truer words have not been heard by my ears in a very long time! Well said Kim. ^_^

[Jeneva]

That is a great quote.  I've always held that once you are comfortable with yourself that it shows outward.  It is related to the whole confidence increases passing.  When you KNOW you are female then others can see it in you and just accept it as you have.

Here is a challenge for you though...  Take what she has said and how it was worded even and compare it to your previously expressed opinions about makeup and how someone is dressed as a measure of how gendered they are.  Do you see why those of us who have argued against measuring transness or genderedness jump into those threads?

Thank you for sharing that quote.

[Naturally Blonde]

One of them said something that I will never forget... ever. "You shouldn't need to tell anybody what you are. You should just be you. If you're a girl, that'll show and it doesn't matter what you're wearing, if you're wearing makeup, none of that will make a difference. The teachers don't care, the students here don't care, and the customers wont care. You're just being yourself. I don't really think you had any reason to tell her anything."

She shows great maturity and logic!

[King Malachite]

Awesome!  If only there were more people like that.

[Alainaluvsu]

That is a great quote.  I've always held that once you are comfortable with yourself that it shows outward.  It is related to the whole confidence increases passing.  When you KNOW you are female then others can see it in you and just accept it as you have.

Here is a challenge for you though...  Take what she has said and how it was worded even and compare it to your previously expressed opinions about makeup and how someone is dressed as a measure of how gendered they are.  Do you see why those of us who have argued against measuring transness or genderedness jump into those threads?

Thank you for sharing that quote.

Well what she has said is true in theory and emotion. However if you look like a guy, most people out of respect will still sir you. That i guess is where i disagree with what she said. But if you act female and in your being, you are female, people will treat you as one. I can back this up by my experiences at work. I get sir'd blah blah blah, but after showing my personality (even in a veiled way), the guys will still lift all the heavy stuff, and not let me have a freaking opinion about anything.


I personally hate that i have to show people (by personality) that im female before being treated as one. Id rather just look the part so i can skip the whole proving stage!