For people wondering if they should..

[Stephe]

Top five regrets of the dying

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying?fb=native&CMP=FBCNETTXT9038

If you don't live a life true to yourself, you will live to regret not doing so.

[Alyx.]

Ugh. Yeah that feeling.

Now that I'm becoming more true to myself it makes me realize that all these years as a boy I was never truly living.

[MarcyThomas7268]

It's of utmost importance of being true to yourself. If you have been seeking approval from others, it can only stop today, in the present moment. There is no past or future except what we make it.

[Trixie]

I feel this is directed at people like me. I don't want to be pressured into anything, just as I don't want to feel pressured not to do anything. I so wish it wasn't something so profoundly socially unacceptable and taboo... I wish it wasn't, but that's the way things are. I have other reasons for not doing it as well.

[Rabbit]

This is a very good link. Just his past year as I started hormones... I suddenly had a MUCH great appreciation for feelings and friends and... well.. simply being happy. I also stopped feeling like I needed to make my life all about work... that it wasn't about a pissing contest with everyone around you. There is no "winner" in life.

[Beverley]

This is a very good link. Just his past year as I started hormones... I suddenly had a MUCH great appreciation for feelings and friends and... well.. simply being happy. I also stopped feeling like I needed to make my life all about work... that it wasn't about a pissing contest with everyone around you.

I agree with all of that.

There is no "winner" in life.

Oh I must disagree with that bit - *I* intend to be a winner. I intend to have as few regrets as possible and I intend to eliminate as many of those 5 as I can. That is how I win.

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

- My transition is mainly about this


2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.

- I have already scaled back on that front with plans for a major career change in 5 years time.


3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

- In progress (see 1 above)


4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

- This is something I need to improve on


5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

- In progress (see 1 and 3 above)

[Michelle G]

Yikes! #1 and 3 is so much about me its scary!
  I have spent my life being what "others" want to see me as, whether it was family or in relationships...I have been thinking a lot about this lately as my wife while being understanding with my transistion is still saying "dont do this or dont do that" with things like shaving totally smooth or the type of things I want to wear. I am so ready to sit her down and have a talk with her!! (even though she is clearly the dominant female here)

as far as work goes I have always stuck to what my grandfather told me at a young age "you will never work a day in your life if you do what you love" I have been so true to myself on that one!!

[Beverley]

... as far as work goes I have always stuck to what my grandfather told me at a young age "you will never work a day in your life if you do what you love" I have been so true to myself on that one!!

I did that too, but after 26 years of doing it, it is beginning to pale somewhat and I need a change. My problem is that I am good at what I do and there is no challenge left any more. It is all too easy now and I am not prepared to spend another 15 to 20 years being bored rigid.

I am combining my transition with a lifestyle change and I have assigned five years to it and then I am going to try something completely different. Maybe it will not work but so what? By then the kids will be grown up and my financial commitments will be minimal and I should still be physically healthy (barring unforeseen circumstances).

The whole point is not to lie on that death-bed as say 'I wish I had tried xxxxxx'.