Questioned at work

[Inkwe Mupkins]

At work I am stealth and in my files it says male. Anywhos today I saw a guy I knew from highschool and knew about my past, etc. and went on my way. Then later an employee I work with came up to me and said,"There's a rumor going around that you were born female is this true". I said no, i was born male. She then said "I knew it, thats what I told em..you don't seem male to me, I told em I'd seen you going into the mens room while ppl are in there if you had female parts you wouldn't do that".

This hasn't been brought up untill I saw that guy who works day shifts that knew me. I'm getting a new job in a week so I'm to worried about anything. But its all I can think about...my biggest fear was someone finding out my "secret". I'm worried as hell now and I'm afraid they might believe who ever said it.

Should I be worried? Has this happened to you? I'm have quite a bit of facial hair now, and my voice is deep, im literally shaking right now.

[Felix]

If you want to keep it to yourself, just keep denying it and act casual. Even if somebody busts out with pictures or records, they'll look weirder for being crazy stalkers than you would for wanting to keep such info private.

I know that doesn't help. I hate gossip. I've run into this in much lower-stakes situations, and it left me shaking too.

[MrTesto]

If you think it's one person who could be the source, and you feel like they would be respectful and not malicious, maybe head things off at the pass (so to speak) and talk with them. At this point, there is the possibility of the person who asked you, going back to where she heard it, and the person from your past might be in the position of proving they aren't a liar. Getting to them and telling them to stop discussing your private medical information (using those words puts things into language most people can understand) will enable them to respond to any further questions by blowing it off - "oh, no, I thought it was someone I knew, but I was mistaken."

It's a hella awkward chat to have (believe you me - mine was at a, umm, party), but you will have less of a feeling that stuff is out there. And if the other person refuses, you at least have taken the first step anyone would suggest. After that, take it up with HR as a case of harassment. Good luck.

[insideontheoutside]

Personally I'd deny it too. There's enough people who look like other people out there to pass it off. Hell I've gotten that before  ... "You look just like this guy I used to know!" only it really was someone I never knew. So yeah, if all your records have male, I'd deny it. Or worst case scenario if something weird started happening because of this incident I'd approach the main boss person and either come out with the truth (if you think they could be trusted) or bust out with something like you don't appreciate the rumors, etc. to get it to stop.