Gatekeeper rant :)

[Tyler]

Hmmm, ohh that actually seems like a good idea Thanks tyler

Your welcome

[mementomori]

Why?

To protect people from themselves?

So because of a tiny handful of people who do it and regret it, the solution is....

Me, someone who has lived 'full time' (god I hate that term), who is known by everyone as female, who would happily have SRS tomorrow if I could and have to deal with daily depression because of my anatomy, who therapists told me I needed to wait a year before even starting HRT only to decide to self-med against their advice and never regretted it, who told me I 'needed' to find a new shrink when I left brisbane and didn't and never been better as a result.

Me, I can't have SRS unless I do the following.

Go to my doctor and get referrals to (usually) 2 therapists. Explain to them about my life story and have a good chance if my history is anything to go by they'll make me come back to them indefinitely wasting tons of money I don't have.

Why am I punished for a tiny minority of people who usually get approval sooner or later anyway.

I would love to have SRS but I haven't and won't until I recover from the exhaustion caused BY my former therapists. The anxiety of having to waste time all the time seeing them, repeating myself, wasting money and 40 minutes of my life of what's supposed to be a 60 minute session, listening to their crap that I know fully well is crap and know they won't be able to produce any sources for and will just belittle their dropout drug addict patient if I call them out on it.

Just so some idiot who barely knows me with an astoundingly unfounded sense of self-confidence can say I'm mentally sound?

And I'm not mentally sound, it's catch 22. The overwhelming amount of bureaucratic nonsense gatekeeping causes keeps me from more actively going for SRS because I hate therapists, is in itself depressing, as is the fact I haven't had SRS. Complicating that I have multiple sclerosis and a childhood abuse and substance abuse history that will no doubt be used as an excuse to milk as many therapy sessions out of me as possible. All in the name of 'dealing with other issues first'. Well you know what, some issues can't be 'dealt' with, can't be 'put behind you'. Some things happen that change you and nothing's ever going to make you the person you might have been had they not happened. You just have to learn to live with it. I've tried talk therapy, doesn't work for me.


I've had 5+ therapists in the past few years and I hate them. I've been in the mental hospital after a suicide attempt where I was constantly exposed to therapists and group therapy and all that rubbish.

Seeing a therapist for me is like I have a boss I hate and have to listen too and pretend I have respect for, only I'm paying THEM.

So thanks for that, thank you so much for supporting that system.

The worst part is not even the transgender community is a source of support for me, indoctrinated and brainwashed by the system that controls them convincing them it's needed.

have you been to dr gail bearmen/ the gender centre in brisbane? or did you have troubles with them too . im sorry i didnt mean to make anyone feel upset by my comment .

[Asfsd4214]

have you been to dr gail bearmen/ the gender centre in brisbane? or did you have troubles with them too . im sorry i didnt mean to make anyone feel upset by my comment .

It's ok. I've never been to the gender centre but I haven't heard much good reports out of them. I have been to Dr Bearmen and have nothing but positive things to say about her. But she's not a shrink.

For anyone who happens to read this who's in the Brisbane area, here's some psychs and experiences I've had with them.

For gender related purposes:
Dr Alison McColl - Expects you to live full time for 12 months prior to giving letter, claims SoC as source of requirement, can't produce SoC when asked.
Dr Diana Hamilton - Exactly the same as above but is even more unreasonable and even more vague about when she'll give you your letter and has even more of an unfounded sense of authority.
Dr Helen Hoey - Better than the last two, still hard to get a letter out of and her secretary is extremely condescending to younger patients. But she will at least consider giving a letter early if you're self medicating, the prior two won't even do that much.

If you're in the Sydney area I also have had experiences with (accompanying someone else, not seeing them personally):
Dr Patrick Toohey - Real old school, will likely string you along indefinitely and like many of the others I've mentioned will use his qualifications to beat you into submission if you disagree with him.

For non-gender related purposes
Ms Anwen King - Psychologist not a psychiatrist, didn't see her for gender related stuff. Lovely person and one of the better shrinks I've ever seen (score one for psychologists). Does CBT and is very good at her job, I don't blame her for having limited success in helping me, she at least listened and seemed to care.

Disclaimer: Just in case any of the above people want to sue me or something. I'm broke so you won't get anything. Also these are my personal opinions and experiences and should in no way reflect the character of the above mentioned people personally and are purely my perceptions of their methodologies as I honestly saw them at the time.

[mementomori]

It's ok. I've never been to the gender centre but I haven't heard much good reports out of them. I have been to Dr Bearmen and have nothing but positive things to say about her. But she's not a shrink.

For anyone who happens to read this who's in the Brisbane area, here's some psychs and experiences I've had with them.

For gender related purposes:
Dr Alison McColl - Expects you to live full time for 12 months prior to giving letter, claims SoC as source of requirement, can't produce SoC when asked.
Dr Diana Hamilton - Exactly the same as above but is even more unreasonable and even more vague about when she'll give you your letter and has even more of an unfounded sense of authority.
Dr Helen Hoey - Better than the last two, still hard to get a letter out of and her secretary is extremely condescending to younger patients. But she will at least consider giving a letter early if you're self medicating, the prior two won't even do that much.

If you're in the Sydney area I also have had experiences with (accompanying someone else, not seeing them personally):
Dr Patrick Toohey - Real old school, will likely string you along indefinitely and like many of the others I've mentioned will use his qualifications to beat you into submission if you disagree with him.

For non-gender related purposes
Ms Anwen King - Psychologist not a psychiatrist, didn't see her for gender related stuff. Lovely person and one of the better shrinks I've ever seen (score one for psychologists). Does CBT and is very good at her job, I don't blame her for having limited success in helping me, she at least listened and seemed to care.

Disclaimer: Just in case any of the above people want to sue me or something. I'm broke so you won't get anything. Also these are my personal opinions and experiences and should in no way reflect the character of the above mentioned people personally and are purely my perceptions of their methodologies as I honestly saw them at the time.

can dr gail prescribe hormones and refer you to a edo? or do you have to go to a shrink first . seeing a shrink first would just be annoying , i already know all the pros and cons and the health risks etc

[Asfsd4214]

She does have the authority to prescribe, but by convention she won't without a psych's letter of recommendation. Once you have that letter though, you don't need an endocrinologist. A lot of people like to have them and feel better with them, but endocrinologically speaking, HRT for our purposes is a very simple thing that a regular GP can do quite easily.

It's really just prescribing a standard startout dose, doing blood work, checking your levels compared to the reference ranges, and then adjusting the dose accordingly.

[mementomori]

She does have the authority to prescribe, but by convention she won't without a psych's letter of recommendation. Once you have that letter though, you don't need an endocrinologist. A lot of people like to have them and feel better with them, but endocrinologically speaking, HRT for our purposes is a very simple thing that a regular GP can do quite easily.

It's really just prescribing a standard startout dose, doing blood work, checking your levels compared to the reference ranges, and then adjusting the dose accordingly.

do you know any therapists who would be good at working with someone who is non binary ? doesnt identify internally as male or female  .

[Asfsd4214]

do you know any therapists who would be good at working with someone who is non binary ? doesnt identify internally as male or female  .

Sorry I don't.

I had a hard enough trouble finding a therapist who would even accept that you could be mtf without dressing and acting like a stereotype.

[mementomori]

thats so incredably frustrating , i wish people were a little more perceptive to people and the many variations instead of just examining us all of some prototype/ mold . i have a mtf lesbian friend who wears clothes off the mens rack but has transitioned with ffs hormones etc, shes just a tomboy . and when i tell some people that they just dont understand it at all , they say ridiculious stuff like " but they like girls , so why bother . " " but why would they do that only  to wear mens clothes ? "

[kelly_aus]

do you know any therapists who would be good at working with someone who is non binary ? doesnt identify internally as male or female  .

I know one here in Adelaide.. Being non-binary is an idea he has floated about me.. I don't agree, but we have discussed it..

[luna nyan]

Dr Patrick Toohey - Real old school, will likely string you along indefinitely and like many of the others I've mentioned will use his qualifications to beat you into submission if you disagree with him.

Welp, the more letters you have after your name the more likely that you know a lot about nothing.
One of teachers once said this to my class:
You start off life knowing absolutely nothing about everything.
You go and study and learn then:
You know something about somethings
You go and study a lot more, and if you're really unfortunate...
You know absolutely everything about nothing!
In other words, some people get so specialised, that they can't see the forest for the trees.

I haven't seen Dr Toohey, but I suspect my endo works with him so if I ever want to do anything further, I may have to deal with him.  To be honest, I found therapy somewhat limited - I've been self analytical for long enough that it was pretty much a case of confirmation of self diagnosis.

I did see Dr Hance for one consultation - I found him rather remote so to speak, and he basically told me to go and get a love life and then get back to him about my GID.  Put me off from doing anything further for quite a few years.

[Rabbit]

Well, I ended up discovering a therapist that lived down the street from me and saw him today...

He said I seemed completely fine and would write me the letter the next session So, 2 sessions I guess I'm getting off easy.

Though he seems like a very interesting person and might know some people in the area that can help get my game company going So, that would be a fun turn of events if it works out (and puts a silver lining on the entire needing my mental health evaluated before society lets me do what I wish with my body).

[Jenny_B_Good]

If you're in the Sydney area I also have had experiences with (accompanying someone else, not seeing them personally):
Dr Patrick Toohey - Real old school, will likely string you along indefinitely and like many of the others I've mentioned will use his qualifications to beat you into submission if you disagree with him.


Disclaimer: Just in case any of the above people want to sue me or something. I'm broke so you won't get anything. Also these are my personal opinions and experiences and should in no way reflect the character of the above mentioned people personally and are purely my perceptions of their methodologies as I honestly saw them at the time.

hehehe ... Love the disclaimer.

I went to Dr Toohey to get my letter for HRT- Found him to be pleasant and quite accommodating actually.
Was he questioning me? Of course.
Did he argue with me? No
Disagree with me? Yes.

That why I paid the money. To get help from a professional. They were times I found him infuriating, by only because he was testing me, and you know what, it made a stronger person because of it. After 3 months I was a stronger human being. Completely.
I had finally removed some doubts thanks to working with him.

I don't post this to argue with others in a matter of opinion, we are all entitled to that, but I do mention that if your going to pay someone a large sum of money- get your money's worth.

I offer to potential clients in the Sydney area that "Others can only react to what you give them". So will that be love, acceptance and understanding

Only you can decide that.

Live lively my sisters,

Love,
  Jenny

OXOXOXOX