So I'm new to the online trans community and I just recently starting posting on another trans website - same name. But just reaching out for more resources and friends.
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I go by Roxy and I am a nearly 21 pre-anything transkid (MTF) who is just starting her journey. I haven't exactly always known that I wanted to be a woman, but I've always known I was a lot more in tune to femininity than the masculine ideals that the men in my life and society tried to spoon-feed me.
I was always different growing up. Kind of the typical story really. I was always hanging around the girls, all my best friends were always girls until high school, I always wanted to partake of the finer (feminine) things in life. I was always outcasted/shunned/teased/ostracized by the boys at school (from primary all the way through to high school).
My sexual orientation, I think, really kept me from knowing about my gender identity. I knew probably from the age of 5 that I was attracted to men (never really had an attraction to women until the past year or so). But once I realized that a person could be gay, I was like, "Yes! That must be it! that must be why I'm different". I came out to my parents, friends, the world in high school and really thought I had it all figured out.
Once I made it to University, I actually met LGBTQ people and started to really feel a bit less "weird". I met gay guys and lesbians who I really turned to for support and friendship. I also met first trans people and really it surprised me how easy I grasped their situations. Then, I forced myself to step out of my comfort zone and do drag. (I'm kind of a 'big' local name from my town for my performing actually!) And from then on...it's been a bit of a struggle. I struggled with whether I liked it because I was a natural performer or because there was something more...real...about it. Within the past year, I've realized it's a bit of both. I went by a genderqueer identity for a few months, but within the last 10 I've realized that...really that was my "I'm bi, but really gay" way of easing into things.
*DISCLAIMER* I know people can really be bisexual and that all don't just say that when they really are another way. I apologize if it comes off wrong, but generally it makes it easier for some people to understand that portion of my story.
Anyway, I met an amazing guy (who is FTM, actually just had his top surgery two days ago! ) But we eventually started dating and have been in each other's lives for about 10 months. He's been there from the beginning of my coming out as trans - he was the first! He really helped me to realize that whether I was trans or not, transitioned or not - that someone could love me the way I am. Well eventually, I came out to my mom, my sister, my close friends from high school, and most of the queer community I'm at University with now and really just trying to figure out what all I want to do as far as navigating now.
I know my intro is long, but I'm really looking for more support. There is a huge transmasculine community where I live and pretty much the transfeminine community is me. Every transgirl that I've met (who is close to my age) is stealth...and it's really hard.
