How do you guys deal with gender dysphoria?

[poptart]

Basically the title says it all. What kind of things do you guys do to cope with this ->-bleeped-<-ty condition and keep yourself from going psychotic or blowing your brains out? It is becoming debilitating for me, so I need ways to keep it at bay. Suggestions; what works for you?

[Shang]

Writing, particularly roleplaying yaoi.  That is my main way of dealing with dysphoria.  I also will drink a ton of soda if I start feeling dysphoric because it gives me something to do.  Those ways don't seem like they'd work, but they work well for me.

[Natkat]

my homones, and surgery do alot of work for me, (thanks god)
but beside that I guess I deal with it in a way of my mind and knowlegde way of thinking.

I belive gender is fluent, its difficult to explain but I belive ever guy has some kind of female inside and every girl has some male inside.

In that way I dont feel that much diffrent from usually cis-guys. what I do feel diffrence is my knowlegde and awareness of that.
so even if a guy is ignorant and tells me "your a girl" or whatever, then I just fell shame for the man, that he dont know better, whats makes us men and women.
--
I dont know if that made sense.

when I was not that pass able I also hang out with my friends who just take me as a guy, it also gave less phobia for sure, insteed of meeting strangers who would doubt you.
it still is.

[Stewie]

I have learned how to not hate my body basically. This is my body. I will help it become more how I feel on the inside once I start T. But honestly, I just see it as a reality. I used to think that it was the worst curse on the planet and really dramatic stuff like that. But pretty soon I will be going to a therapist and hopefully soon after that, I will start T. It's a slow process and you gotta be willing to take it a step at a time. Sometimes it's terrible. Sometimes it isn't. I really don't look at my body anywhere from the neck down. So just knowing that one day things will change helps

[Kreuzfidel]

Living with it for 28 years consciously, it's evolved from raging, depression, withdrawing or lashing out to completely dissociating.  I guess my mind deals with it by shutting down in a way - there are few distractions I can do to ease it, especially being stuck at home 24/7.

[supremecatoverlord]

Suggestions; what works for you?

I try to get out there, do other things, make goals that may be separate from your transition goals - even if they are by myself, getting out there and doing something else that requires focus is enough to temporarily take my mind out of a harrowing depression.

I know how you feel and that's why I see time & waiting as the worst enemy to my dysphoria - I wish I could wake up tomorrow with the body I want, but right now I'm forced to wait. As I do, I'm just hoping my mind doesn't slip and I fall into another dysphoric episode while in the process of waiting. Like I said here, distraction may be key - sure, your feelings for yourself aren't going to dissipate, but burying them may not a bad thing as you're already well on your way to being much happier with yourself.

Also, if you ever need to vent, you're more than welcome to message me.

[Darth_Taco]

Might not be great to the non-religious, but I pray :'P. I just pray for the strength to get through this one day at a time. It's that or I start getting high again XP.

[Frank]

Something usually sparks it off and then for the whole evening I'm ruined so lately I've figured out how to recognize it fast and distract with something like watching tv shows online and then reading.

[Zerro]

I work, and that's pretty much it. The money goes towards what I need to help fix this messed up shell I live in, so I focus on that.

[King Malachite]

I put more time in visiting this site and I play video games to try and deal with it.  I also put myself in an anime fantasy land or pretend that I am a famous MMA fighter etc. I need to exercise to help cope with it.  It would help a lot more and actually get my body prepared for when I do transition.

I also think about the future and my life in steps.  If I am upset at someone I will keep repeating to myself, "Step 7: Freedom".

[Norbert]

I just suck it up and do whatever I have to that day.
Dwelling on it just makes it worse.

[conformer]

Since being on T, my dysphoria has decreased greatly, however I try to to keep myself busy, mostly with school, to cope with the little dysphoria I do have. I also focus on the things about my body that I like and have become comfortable with my nether regions. Really, my only issue is my chest.

[poptart]

my homones, and surgery do alot of work for me, (thanks god)

Yeah, getting surgery would be the most effective way, since it eliminates the source of the dysphoria rather than just masking it. Problem is that I have no clue when I can get surgery, but I know it'll be over a year at least.

Living with it for 28 years consciously, it's evolved from raging, depression, withdrawing or lashing out to completely dissociating.  I guess my mind deals with it by shutting down in a way - there are few distractions I can do to ease it, especially being stuck at home 24/7.

Pretty much same here, dissociation. But still there are times when I'm hit so hard by reality -- I get so dysphoric I can't even get out of bed, or I have to get really drunk/high so I don't self-destruct. What I'm saying is that one can't dissociate forever.

Unrelated: This is why I have such an intense aversion to people who see being trans as a positive thing, like the ones on Tumblr. It's appalling when they parade around like being trans is fun, cool, trendy or a source of pride when it is actually a source of suffering. So, if I ever come off as too opinionated on these people, that's why.

Also, if you ever need to vent, you're more than welcome to message me.

Having somewhere to rant is always good. Lol. Thanks dude.




And to everyone else. I can't respond to everyone since it'd be a text wall, but I do appreciate everyone's input.

[Devlyn]

@ Poptart, Unrelated and unnecessary. Shame on you for having an intense aversion to people who can have a positive outlook on life. As far as being trans equals suffering, you forgot to say "for me" Not everyone sees things the same. Please state opinions as opinions, not fact. Hugs, Devlyn

[Kelly J. P.]

@ Poptart, Unrelated and unnecessary. Shame on you for having an intense aversion to people who can have a positive outlook on life. As far as being trans equals suffering, you forgot to say "for me" Not everyone sees things the same. Please state opinions as opinions, not fact. Hugs, Devlyn

I think that it would be fair to say that, when reading peoples' posts, you can generally assume that this-or-that is always one's opinion unless there are sources or citations to back a statement up. I don't believe that poptart intended for everything he said to be taken as universal truth.

And as for those people on tumblr... it's not a longshot to understand why he might feel annoyed at them. This applies especially to those tumblr kids who claim they are trans, FtM, or whatever, and are really just occasional gender-benders (cis) that treat it as some sort of fad. People tend to get irritated when something that is serious to them is made light of, and treated like a joke, as they feel betrayed by how it is misprepresented.

At least, that's what I think.

[supremecatoverlord]

@ Poptart, Unrelated and unnecessary. Shame on you for having an intense aversion to people who can have a positive outlook on life. As far as being trans equals suffering, you forgot to say "for me" Not everyone sees things the same. Please state opinions as opinions, not fact. Hugs, Devlyn

For most people, it's a lot of suffering.
I think he's more than entitled to feeling annoyed that some people treat something like being trapped in the wrong body as if it's a trend.
Personally, I think his feelings are justified and actually totally related to his dysphoria.

[poptart]

@ Poptart, Unrelated and unnecessary. Shame on you for having an intense aversion to people who can have a positive outlook on life. As far as being trans equals suffering, you forgot to say "for me" Not everyone sees things the same. Please state opinions as opinions, not fact. Hugs, Devlyn

Lol. I'm not referring to positive outlooks on life itself, but to their outlook on a debilitating medical condition. How can it possibly be considered a positive thing? That's like being proud of having cancer. I don't mean being proud of overcoming it; that is understandable, but suffering from it in the first place.

BTW the text above your pic says "MTF crossdresser" so I'm going to assume you're transgender rather than someone with transsexualism (correct if wrong). I don't know why you care, since I'm not even talking about something that affects you. Also, Kelly J. P. has it exactly right when she says:

"People tend to get irritated when something that is serious to them is made light of, and treated like a joke, as they feel betrayed by how it is misprepresented."

[Devlyn]

Perhaps we should review Susans definition of Transgender. "Anyone who transcends their birth gender for any reason." Those Tumblr kids are part of our community. Hugs, Devlyn

[supremecatoverlord]

Perhaps we should review Susans definition of Transgender. "Anyone who transcends their birth gender for any reason." Those Tumblr kids are part of our community. Hugs, Devlyn

Again, most people on tumblr treat trans as if it's cool, like it's a trend.

I know I'd be pretty ticked off if I was gay and someone treated being gay like it was a fad as well.

I see where you are coming from, but what if you felt like someone was mocking a problem or condition that you have?
Wouldn't you at least feel a little hurt?

I don't think he is trying to be offensive.

[Edge]

My hatred for weakness is stronger. Depression and self destructive tendencies are weak. I'm not entirely sure I'm not psychotic, but I've been told I'm not, logically I'm not, and so I decided to stop worrying about it as much. I love life. There is no freaking way I'm going to let anyone (myself included) mess that up for me. Being debilitated is not an option for me.
Dysphoria used to contribute greatly to my depression. I stopped letting it. I'm not quite sure how yet. Maybe it really is just that my hatred for weakness is stronger. I also came to accept that it wasn't going away. Not to mention, I wouldn't be able to be here without a body and I like being here.

On another note, as someone who does suffer from a formerly debilitating medical condition, I am pretty glad I suffered it in the first place. I wouldn't have learned a lot of the things I know now if it weren't for that. That's why I have positive outlook on my medical condition. That may just me though.
I am also hurt when people treat things as fads.