What size of community do you live in?

[MadeleineG]

I live in a small town. In many ways, I think small towns are great: supportive, close, short commutes, predictable, stereotype to be named later. That being said, working through the logistics of transitioning in one has my heart beating fast and furiously. And not in a good way. My wife maintains that:

Challenges transitioning are inversely proportionate to the population of the community!

I'm interested to know how you feel about the impact of community size and what sized communities you actually live in.

Maddy

[Northern Jane]

I grew up in a very small town in the 1950s & 60s in a very backwards part of rural Ontario. It was rather isolated from 'civilization' and the average person was not well educated - the average was probably 5 or 6 years of schooling - but it was the kind of place where everybody knew everybody else and families had known each other for generations. If you didn't know all about someone else and their family history, someone you knew well probably did. It was the kind of place where everybody looked out for everybody else and "kept an eye on" strangers passing through.

Despite being poverty-stricken and uneducated (or maybe because of it), people were remarkably accepting. I was known as "different" from early childhood but not in a Gay sort of way but just "different" than most, quiet and gentle, preferring the company of girls, but not "swishy". The tolerance and acceptance continued through my teens when I began living a double life and even appearing en femme around town occasionally. I changed my image a lot en femme and thought  I was passing but in retrospect everybody probably knew who I was but were just not surprised enough to say anything. According to the scuttlebutt relayed by my sister, when I moved away to transition and have SRS (age 24), nobody was the least surprised; the most common comments were "It is about time she figured it out!" and "What took so long?" I could not have had a more tolerant community to grow up in!

I lived in big cities from time to time and found there is anonymity in numbers because I never caused the slightest ripple, just another young woman trying to make her way in the world.

Six years after transition/SRS I was living in a rural area in another part of the country and had been there a few years when rumours of my medical history reached the grapevine. I didn't hear the rumours myself - my husband shielded me from them - but I suspected what had happened. I lost a few "friends" but when the dust had settled not much had changed. I was still accepted as "just another woman" by most.

Compared to many I seem to have been incredibly lucky when it comes to being accepted as "just another woman"....

[Cindy]

I live in Adelaide 1.6mill

Very accepting.  But from more and more of what I experience Australia seems to be very accepting. I have never experienced any discrimination!


Then again I am gorgeous (Heee Heee) (and big headed )

[Renee]

I live in a very small town of about 420 people and I work at the local store, so pretty much everyone knows me by name, even a bunch from nearby towns/villages.

[Joelene9]

  I always lived in a large area metropolis but in a suburban type setting.  From the unincorporated L.A./ Orange counties, CA as a kid to the City and County of Denver after age 8.  The Denver/ Boulder metroplex has a population of over 3 million.  Transgender acceptance and discrimination varies with the city/neighborhood within this large area.  As with other areas, the acceptance of LGB is becoming moreso than the T population.  My neighborhood near the airport is what you call lukewarm.  You don't know what you'll get in the neighborhoods of Montbello and Green Valley Ranch in the far northeast Denver where I'm at.  In the neighborhoods south of downtown Denver and at the new Stapleton redevelopment area (the old airport) has a high gay presence.   The Stapleton neighborhood, was called "Gaypleton" early by the local press, is expensive and because of that the trans population is much lower than in the other neighborhoods.  Along north Broadway to downtown and along east Colfax, east of downtown a few miles are more accepting of the T population. 

  Joelene

[vegie271]

larger area of between 500,000 & 800,000 moved there from a town of 105  there I was very accepted - here I I have been hated & had my first hate crime of my life & the police just laughed about it & then had the nerve to misgender me on the report even though I have all of my ID fully changed.

[Miss Jill Thorn]

less than 10000

[stavraki]

I live in a village of 50 people, my seven circles of family and friends who they are, and we are the village embedded in a megalopolis.

Not quite the village of my earliest memories--rural, beautiful, rustic, but 'as good as it gets'.

[Jamiep]

A west suburb of about 1 million to the Greater Toronto Area total population of about 3 million. Marginally accepting in my area with LGBTQIA community services. Toronto core has an enlightening media & helps creating a liberal sense to gender & has the LGBTQIA "Church St. village."

[big kim]

I live in Blackpool which is a large town with about 140,000 people living there and many tourists.There's been a large LGBT scene for many years and most people are pretty tolerant.The Police take homophobia/transphobia very seriously and do a good job catching the dirtbags.

[RachaelAnn22]

I live in the country not too many people around.

[Oriah]

Less than ten people in the square mile of me.  The rabbits, chickens, goats and geese are all pretty accepting though

[vegie271]

Less than ten people in the square mile of me.  The rabbits, chickens, goats and geese are all pretty accepting though

^^^^^^^^

my idea of heaven   

[Oriah]

^^^^^^^^

my idea of heaven   

heaven's full of rattlesnakes and water moccasins, just fyi

[vegie271]

heaven's full of rattlesnakes and water moccasins, just fyi

Last place I lived had rattle snakes - and I used to go camping out in the desert - in a tent - for at least a week - carrying our water - miles from everyone - you needed a compass and a topographical map to find the place we were getting to  (Dove spring)  I have been able to take care of myself.

[AdamMLP]

I live in a village of apparently 369 people.  Not sure how accurate that figure is though.  Most people know most people, and one crazy drunkard even stopped someone in the road and told them to get out because they weren't born and bred here (then again he did try and kill me with a machete when I was a baby, so he's not representative of the community.

I'm not out here yet, so I can't comment on the acceptance of trans people, but I've never heard a bad word about lesbians, and there are at least four people, two of them are a couple, who are seen as lesbians.  Little do they know that two of those are a trans guy and his girlfriend...

[cheonsa1017]

Our town is very small, and we both pretty much hate it but feel stuck here due to my family.

[Amy The Bookworm]

I live in a small town. And when I say small I mean Population 450 small. I mean so small GPS isn't always able to find our house so we have to argue with shipping companies that our address exists when we order something on line because if it doesn't show up on the GPS system then the company tries to refuse our package because they think we're trying to deliver the package to a house that doesn't exist small. I mean that the nearest Wal-Mart is 60 miles away small. I mean that you can get nothing delivered to your house, not even pizza or the mail small. I'm talking no stores, no cable providers, no police, no no stop lights, (not even one!), no mayor, and one high speed internet provider small. I'm talking I've found cows and chickens that got free from the near by farm in my yard small!

I'm interested to know how you feel about the impact of community size and what sized communities you actually live in.

I feel that my community is going to be one of the largest issues with transitioning. The place I live is very small (...) and consists of people mostly in their 50s and 60s and is very close minded to, really, the modern world in a lot of ways. I truly feel something as complex as gender transition may be above their comprehension. This makes me fear for my safety in some ways if this got out while I live here, and it's also a pain because there just aren't any resources near by for me to draw from to help me work with this, so I have to go pretty far away just to get any kind of help outside of my computer.

...But that's a problem with everything from food to medical issues to just about everything that doesn't involve a bank, a small gas station with over priced fuel, or bad fried food at the local restaurant or beer at the bar.

I've mentioned I play MMOs to pass the time ... and a running joke with my guildies is when I start to talk about having to get something or about my town someone says "Your town is so small ...." And they crack some kind of joke.

...It's that small. I think I suffer from town envy.