Need advice..indeed

[Smith]

Hi girls, I'm really newbie and do not know what I have suppose to do, and I hope I put to the right category.

I hope all girls here could explain to me, I had changed my name on my Identity card, birth certificate and changed gender become Female also, but I haven't do SRS, but I will, I've been collecting money.

To be honest, is very hard to find psychiatrist to understand about transgender here, because in my country majority is Muslim and they don't like transgender people.  I had found some psychiatrists but they always told me that I was walked on the wrong path; they told me that I must realize this life. So I leaved them.

4 times I failed, I leaved them.  One day in Vihara (Buddhist temple), I'm Buddhism, I met someone, she is psychiatrist and she is Buddhism and I can shared with her about my live, she introduced her friend a doctor (Buddhism also) and since then I can do HRT till now (almost 2 years).  She was very nice, kind, care and she was like my sister.  She gave me great support, advices and taught me how to face people, really unbelievable that I could find the same person like her in this world.

But I lost contact with her since around 6 months ago, after her married and move to other town, her neighbor said, I called her many times but no one pick up the phone, her mobile phone also.

Since that day, I've been on HRT by self medical and keep control medical checkup all by myself.  I realize that is hard to find new psychiatrist that understand about people like me here.

I even open susan.org website from proxy website (premium4all.net) because all transgender websites are closed  (blocked) by all ISPs here, and almost all proxy websites have been closing either, fortunately I can open susans.org via premium4all.net and I do not know for next time.

About my life, I'm trader now for computer part and accessories, I quitted from my previous job and I'm focusing for my own business, and all customers have known me as a woman, my identity card, bank account also use new information with female gender.

Am I do wrong step? Because to complete procedure before SRS needs some document from doctor and psychiatrist, I must find new doctor and psychiatrist since I lost contact to them since around 6 months ago.

I need your advice girls, opinion, etc.  I'm still looking new psychiatrist but I haven't found them yet.
I'm a person that not opens easily to other people, except in this forum because I believe some people here are understand as well about myself.  Sometimes, is too strange for me to hear about TRANSGENDER also, I don't like that title actually.  Transgender, transsexual, or anything like that have bad image in our sociality here.  They will go away if they know that I'm freak not like them.

Thanks girls, I've been waiting your advice, suggestion.

[Jamie D]

Hi Smith.  I recall that you are a transitioner in your late 30's, and that English is a second language. I don't recall if you ever said in which country you were located. You mention here that you are in a muslim majority country.  This worries me because of the potential for a backlash against you from fundamentalists. And there is always the issue of lack of services.

It sounds as if you are located somewhere in east Asia.  If so, you should comsider the services provided in Thailand,

I am also concerned about the self-medication. I hope that you can find a medical professional to help you.  Good luck.

[Smith]

Thank you so much Jamie, indeed, yes you are right, my country is Indonesia (South East Asia).  I'm 37 years old, Jamie would u help me how to find some services in Thailand?  yes, I know very well is too high risk to do self-medication, I really admit it, and I realized this isn't good but from the previous experience what my doctor said about the Estradiol and Spiro consumption and keep control medical check up, I think so far is so good, is around almost for 6 months, last time I did medical checked up 2 months ago, and all normal, hormones level in the blood are normal also.

about the fundamentalist against transgender, I think all information about transgender is blocked (closed) so far, not physically attack or something like that, they just don't like transgender people.  They thought transgender people have walked on the wrong path, and should not be happen, and you are right I think, maybe this is the cause of lack of transgender services.

Jamie, thanks again for your great information.

Hi Smith.  I recall that you are a transitioner in your late 30's, and that English is a second language. I don't recall if you ever said in which country you were located. You mention here that you are in a muslim majority country.  This worries me because of the potential for a backlash against you from fundamentalists. And there is always the issue of lack of services.

It sounds as if you are located somewhere in east Asia.  If so, you should comsider the services provided in Thailand,

I am also concerned about the self-medication. I hope that you can find a medical professional to help you.  Good luck.

[justmeinoz]

Thailand sounds like a good option, and as your English appears to be reasonable have you thought of emigrating to a country that is more welcoming to TS people.  Perhaps you can use your connections in the IT industry to find where your qualifications and experience would be most welcomed.

Karen.

[Smith]

Thanks Karen for your advice, to emigrates to Thailand isn't match time, I must to take care of my mom, my dad has just passed away last week.  I will go to Thailand just for SRS and FFS but I'm collecting money.
And I'm still looking new psychiatrists that could understand me as well.

I think, after SRS and FFS done, no one know that I'm transgender, and I can live normal here like as any woman else.
So, the most important now, I must find new psychiatrists and collects money as much as I can for SRS and FFS.

Thailand sounds like a good option, and as your English appears to be reasonable have you thought of emigrating to a country that is more welcoming to TS people.  Perhaps you can use your connections in the IT industry to find where your qualifications and experience would be most welcomed.

Karen.