Hello,
I am a gay spouse of an FTM hubby on T, so I can, perhaps, relate a bit to your situation. If I had to give one thought, it would be to consider both of your relationship histories. What I mean by that is that you are both going through a big change, and it's getting to be very "real" now (he's had surgery, he's on T, etc.). Depending on where you've both been relationally, there may be some fear associated with what happens next and the next step of commitment. For me, when I was younger and dating straight ladies, I obtained a lot of issues associated with being a "token." What I mean is that I was viewed (small town) as being one of the handsome "catches," and women were more interested in being with someone like me than being with me. In the long run, I wound up getting pretty seriously hurt, and I know that I brought those issues to my current relationship. In fact, I know we got into many fights that were fueled by my insecurities earlier in our relationship. I'm not saying this is you or your partner, I'm just saying that you or he may have some lingering poisons from previous relationships that are carrying over into your current one. If you can, try to think about it. Then, if you think it's worth talking about, try to talk about it.
I hope this helps, and I wish you and your partner good fortune and happiness. Cheers.
Joe
