Discouraged. Not too confident.

[Emmy]

I'm sure most of you have seen a bunch of the different trans-related videos on youtube. Often people record vlogs while transitioning and whatnot.

And to put it simple, instead of finding it helpful I find it so discouraging. I run into women on there that just look so perfect in every way. So many very attractive women that look no different than the average cis girl.
And there are others that just sound spectacular.

I just find it really hard to believe that I could ever look like just a completely ordinary woman. Sometimes it's just hard for me to see any possibility of ever being who I want.

Can anyone relate?

[Beth Andrea]

And to put it simple, instead of finding it helpful I find it so discouraging. I run into women on there that just look so perfect in every way. So many very attractive women that look no different than the average cis girl.
And there are others that just sound spectacular.

Well hon, that's probably why they felt they should put videos up in the first place: Because they DO look so good.

I'm not saying they're egotistical or anything, but if one looks in a mirror and sees nothing "bad", they're more likely to think of good things, such as making a video to help others.

Most of us are probably not perfect, but we're ok. There are a few that don't pass, but they're accepting of this and are content.

I like to use the AA "serenity prayer" in a lot of places...

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.

Certainly in the area of looks I think we need to keep this in mind.

*hugs*

[Madison Leigh]

I'm sure most of you have seen a bunch of the different trans-related videos on youtube. Often people record vlogs while transitioning and whatnot.

And to put it simple, instead of finding it helpful I find it so discouraging. I run into women on there that just look so perfect in every way. So many very attractive women that look no different than the average cis girl.
And there are others that just sound spectacular.

I just find it really hard to believe that I could ever look like just a completely ordinary woman. Sometimes it's just hard for me to see any possibility of ever being who I want.

Can anyone relate?

I very much relate to what you're saying.  However, over the last couple of weeks I've come to see things in a different light.  I'm older than a lot of the women I see I see in the videos you're referring to and I *know* I don't look nearly as good as they do.  However, I've started focusing more on the *differences* in how they look in their earlier videos to how they look in their newer videos - the "delta" if you will.  As I'm older I know there's a likely chance I won't have as much "success" as they are having; but it does give me confidence that positive changes can and will occur.  And in these last few weeks I've discovered that I'm much happier with how I look than I was before.

Madison

[Emmy]

@Beth Andrea
Thanks

@Madison Leigh
Right. I see what you're saying.

I guess when it comes to their before-and-after videos then there's some issues about the money.
Maybe I could look nice. But I have quite the masculine face and I know it'll take so much money for FFS and hair removal to ever get there.

I think that's my only concern. My face. I guess I'm probably a little fortunate for how my overall figure is though, as it's something I'm not worried about at all with passing.  My hair is really long and pretty too.
But my face just ruins everything, lol.

I'm incredibly jealous of the girls that don't even need any face surgery and still manage to look really feminine. Just because I'm certain that won't be the case for me.

[Catherine Sarah]

I just find it really hard to believe that I could ever look like just a completely ordinary woman. Sometimes it's just hard for me to see any possibility of ever being who I want.
Can anyone relate?

Yes I did for a fleeting moment many years ago, relate to what you've said. And then I immediately thought, "But I am a completely ordinary woman" On the inside, and that's the important bit. OK, over time I've made some external adjustments. (Just have a look at my avatar {that will give you a good laugh}). There are more on the way (external adjustments that is) but it's the inside that's getting the most attention and work, AND according to a whole heap of other people, it's working.

So' I've come to the realisation that there will ALWAYS be women who look much better than me, who'll talk much better than me, etc, etc, but the most important aspect is they are NOT me. And I'm not them. It's a GREAT arrangement we've come to, and I like it that way, because I really like me as a person. It's taken me a long time to get here, and there has been some awesome moments and people that have helped craft this wonder. I wouldn't be without me for quids!!

Delusional !!??  ..... Not at all. ....... I was delusional when I thought I could be someone else. That had catastrophic results.

Just think of how wonderfully unique YOU are Emmy. There is no one in the world like YOU. And that makes me very happy.

Be safe, well and happy.
Lotsa huggs
Catherine