Beyond Confused

[Snowman77]

It's weird because I don't care too much for being a female, okay, I hate being a female (I've felt that way my whole life) but for some reason I don't think taking testosterone will make my problems disappear (I've watched tones of FTM videos on YouTube and hear how much of struggle they go through). I just feel like it doesn't matter what you do because at the end of the day you can't change your gender; yet I feel like I'm a male trapped inside of a female's body. I'm not comfortable talking to my parents at all. I'm 22 and I don't feel like I have a good enough relationship with them to even dare tell them let alone my siblings . 
I don't know where to even begin. 

[V M]

Hi Snowman

Welcome to Susan's    Glad to have you here, I'm sure you'll find lots of supportive friends with great insights to relate with

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Hugs

V M

[Jamie D]

Snowman77, you begin by figuring out where your head is at.  Perhaps you are not FtM.  Maybe you are FtA, or genderfluid, or pangendered, or neutrois.

Keep reading and interacting here.

[justmeinoz]

It's not so much a case of changing your Gender, just trying to find out what it is, and then perhaps changing your sex to suit.  Some of us are not really fussed, for others it is a crucial issue.  The main thing is to work out what works for you.

Julia Serrano summed it up when she said, "there are men with vaginas and women with penises, and the world will just have to get used to it", I like it.

Karen.

[Devlyn]

Hi Snowman, it's nice to meet you! I live near Boston. We always have room for new friends here, pull up a chair. Hopefully, someone will come by with snacks! Hugs, Devlyn

[confusedashell]

Welcome Snowman!

I feel a lot like you do, only in the other direction. Hope we can help each other. 

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

Hi Snowman,

Welcome to our little family. Over 7579  strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another brother.


Janet 

[Catherine Sarah]

Hi Snowman,

A bit Aussie welcome to Susan's family. I'm pleased you've dropped in looking for someone who can relate. With a family this size there has to be someone who fully understands. However, in the meantime, have you considered a therapist? They are trained to sort out the mess we find ourselves in from time to time, and can very very productive for us.

As many have said so far, there are many different versions of this community, and it's just a matter of finding the part you relate to.

I hope to hear more about your successes in time to come, but in the meantime, keep in touch and let us know how you are coping.

Be safe, well and happy.
Lotsa huggs
Catherine

[Rick]

Hi Snowman,
Welcome home! Now to find which door to open.....
Like you, it took me years to come to terms with finding out 'what' I was, tho I suspect I new by age 5 or 6. I'd go to bed at night wishing and hoping to wake up the boy that I thought I was supposed to be. Of corse, that didn't happen so I finally took matters in my own hands and began seeing a sex therypist when I was 34. Finally started transition with shots in 1984 and finished the last surgeries in 1997. It was a long road but worth it.
If I can answer any questions you have about anything, please let me know.

Regards,
Rick