I'm in kansas city tonight and meeting my teens tomorrow morning. I've been sad, emotional, crying off and on all day. I've been scared of this day for months I so fear loosing my children. My daughter has already said that no matter what she'll still love me. While I've told her everything I can without coming right out and saying I'm TS, I still worry. I don't think transgender is in their vocabulary yet. They live in a very small and very conseravitive town in kansas. I did not fit in before I transitioned, Now I might was well be from another planet.
One positive note for the day, this was my first major trip as me. While my Drivers license photo is me and my first name works, the middle name and Gender marker, well, To me they look like flashing 24" high neon signs. But from the remarks from the guys at the hotel desk, they don't really look at the information much. No problems with TSA, check in or rental car folks at all or anywhere else for that matter. Though I thing I was clocked by a few fellow travelers, But not many.
I am very very blessed.
It is amazing how flexible my kids are. Luke my oldest, said it did not really matter as every one has issues. He's a very smart lad, too smart to do well in school. Laura was OK with it too, I was not too worried about her as I had told her lots. I had been worried about Luke, But he was like, so what's the problem again. It was a non-issue to them.
Daniel my youngest, I'm not sure he got what I was saying, He's in 7th grade and has a bit of a learning handicap. He's very smart, he tested off the scale in math and science and at about 0 in reading. His brain does not let him read words very well. He learns by hearing the text spoken.. But he is murder with video games, no one can beat him and I mean older teens and adults. In any event I don't think he will have problems with me other then that I'm weird. But there's not been much of a question about that.
This evening, I'm thinking I should have told them months ago, as it's been eating at me for a while. WOW what a day. I'm feeling the stress leave me and that there is a tomorrow. I do get wrapped up emotionally.
I am a very lucky lady to have children so very cool.
Beni
