Asexuals Among Us
Author Jesse Bering explains what it's like to be asexual in his new book.
BY Jesse Bering
July 24 2012 6:00 AM ET
http://www.advocate.com/arts-entertainment/books/2012/07/24/asexuals-among-usAt least, that's what most people tend to think. But some scientists believe that there may be another sexual orientation in our species, one characterized by the absence of desire and no sexual interest in males or females, only a complete and lifelong lacuna of sexual attraction toward any human being (or non-human being). Such people are regarded as asexuals. Unlike bisexuals, who are attracted to both males and females, asexuals are equally indifferent to and uninterested in having sex with either gender. So imagine being a teenager waiting for your sexual identity to express itself, waiting patiently for some intoxicating spurt of lasciviousness to render you as dumbly carnal as your peers, and it just doesn't happen. These individuals aren't simply celibate, which is a lifestyle choice. Rather, sex to them is just so... boring.
In one study from 2007, a group of self-described adult asexuals was asked how they came to be aware they were different. One woman responded:
"I would say I've never had a dream or a fantasy, a sexual fantasy, for example, about being with another woman. So I can pretty much say that I have no lesbian sort of tendencies whatsoever. You would think that by my age I would have some fantasy or dream or something, wouldn't you? ...But I've never had a dream or a sexual fantasy about having sex with a man, either. That I can ever, ever remember."
