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Sometimes I think my mom gets it better than me.

Started by N.Chaos, July 02, 2012, 12:08:21 PM

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N.Chaos

Last week, me Ben and Julie were staying at my parents' house while my dad was out of town, helping take care of the dogs and just generally keeping her company.

My mom is pretty cool, so we all spent a lot of time hanging out with her and watching TV or sitting on the porch. One of the night it was just me and my mom, we got talking about all the gender stuff, and I kept trying to explain how it feels to be wrong, and how I hate it because it just feels so illogical to me.

And basically, all my mom would say was something along the lines of this
"Why wouldn't it make sense? Some people are born where they belong, and some people need to go aways to make home feel like home. What's so hard to get? Whoever you need to be is you, and whoever 'you' is I'll love you."

I realize this is an oversimplification, but hell, I didn't expect any kind of actual understanding from my mom. I knew she'd never hate me, and I knew she'd try to accommodate it, but I figured in her mind I'd always be stuck as a daughter trying to be a boy. She said that though, and I've gotta confess, I cried my eyes out. It just meant the world to me.

She also ragged on me for how much she hates my chin scruff, but grudgingly is starting to like my half-assed soul patch. Her reasoning was what got me on that one though, whether it took her a minute to phrase it right or not, the fact that she said "Some guys just don't look right with facial hair" meant the damn world to me.

And she's gotten so, so good about the name thing. Since my dad still doesn't know, she's basically just not using pronouns unless she absolutely has to, but I haven't been namebombed in weeks and it feels so good.

Just needed to happyvent for once.
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SarahLynn

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Natkat

happy vent is good

its always good to be positive surprised by the ones near around.
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LordKAT

Happy vent, I like that. Good name for a thread, too.
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Darrin Scott

That's great, man. Glad something positive is happening for you.





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Morgan.

Good to hear things went well, N. Your mom sounds like a lovely woman who loves you unconditionally. Perhaps an oversimplification, but acceptance nonetheless. Good stuff! :)

Half of life is f**king up, the other half is dealing with it. - Henry Rollins


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Edge

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Jared

Quote from: N.Chaos on July 02, 2012, 12:08:21 PM
Some people are born where they belong, and some people need to go aways to make home feel like home. What's so hard to get?

I love this  ;D  almost the same thing happened to me, I knew she never would hate me but it was a surprise as she reacted  :) unexpected things like this are cool
If you want to achieve greatness, stop asking for permission.







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dylpickles

And that, people, is the best explanation, and happy thing, I've heard in awhile. awesome.
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N.Chaos

Quote from: Morgan. on July 02, 2012, 10:11:28 PM
Good to hear things went well, N. Your mom sounds like a lovely woman who loves you unconditionally. Perhaps an oversimplification, but acceptance nonetheless. Good stuff! :)

She really is :D She's great.
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cdr_Talos

Glad to hear things like this  ;D, it always makes me feel better to know there are supportive family members and guys getting treated good by family members out there.
Your mom sounds great and I only wish the better for you  :D
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