I don't know what happened to me. I honestly don't. For the longest time I thought that I was TOTALLY fine with my genitals as they are. However, more and more I'm becoming aware I guess that I want a penis and not having it is causing this sense of loss and sadness. Like the idea that I would have to have sex with my wife with a silicone penis that I can't even feel, just isn't doing what it used to do for me. Now it just seems...inadequate. I mean don't get me wrong, for the time being, it seems like a good substitute but I don't know how long that will last.
I've also been scared because I don't know the long term effects of being on hormones but more and more I'm just not letting these fears get to me.
Problem is, I have looked on Trans Bucket but none of those pictures really help. I'm wondering if anyone knows of any GOOD surgeons in the U.S. maybe even Canada. Any information would be truly appreciated. I'm wondering if this has happened to anyone. Where they were so set on never getting bottom surgery and then all of a sudden it seems like you really want it.
