Mom - I Was Wrong

[rhonda13000]

 

I had reported earlier a universal rejection on the part of my 'family', relative to my TS and determination to fully transition, but it is not universal as it turns out.

On Thursday, after acquiring the necessary fingerprints for the name change, I went over to Mom's house. I had taken some time off of work in order to get these fingerprints done and I had a few hours available to me before I had to return to the job.

Mom and I had a serious disagreement in the past and had not spoken since, but I wanted to...resolve things between us - if possible.

So, I walked in her door and she insisted upon making me breakfast - a pleasant but somewhat unexpected surprise and after a while, we sat down, mother and daughter.   

Apparently, she had heard via the 'family grapevine' that it was my full intention to summarily and completely discard all 'familial' ties, given my brothers' embarrassment of me and the argument that Mom and I had, earlier and she started to cry,...

And she told me in essence,

Don't you even THINK about cutting off contact with me! That would kill me. I love you!

Oh rats, I'm starting to 'lose it' right now...

I said to her that it occurred to me that perhaps I should remove myself from her life, as she has enough of a crushing load of stress to deal with, being the caregiver to both my epileptic brother and to my 'father' who is afflicted with Parkinson's.

"That would only make things much worse for me."

So, doing my best to retain my own composure, I promised her that I would never do that and that I would never 'break contact' with her.

You see and think things that simply do not exist, whilst in the heat of passion and high emotion.

And you would think that I would learn this after 51 years, but no. 

But that said, Thursday proved to be a very good day, for several reasons. 

[Wendy]

Rhonda,

Thanks for sharing that pleasant surprise.

Moms tend to be more flexible than dads.

W

[Rachel]

That is good to hear that your mother still wants to be a part of your life.  I dont know what i would do if my family shunned me.

[cindianna_jones]

Oh Rhonda. What a wonderful story. She needs you and you need her. I am so glad that you have been able to "suck it in" and visit her.  Sometimes we have a hard time doing that. You have displayed incredible courage and humility to go back for a visit today. And look at what you both have reaped.  This is so heart warming. Thank you for sharing.

Cindi

[mary83054]

Rhonda:
   Thanks for your beautiful post -       I am still crying but they are tears of hope one of my fears is rejection from family and here you have some great news when you thought all was lost.  I am so glad for you --who knows maybe your brother will come around to but if not you still have your mother and I think that must have really been agood day for yo.

Love:

Mary

[debbiej]

Its a beautiful thing when we realize how much we need each other.

Family

Friends

Neighbors

People, people who need people, are the happiest people...

I am so very happy for you Rhonda