Hitting a milestone (Changing so fast it's hard to keep up)

[Reagan]

So this weekend marked a bit of a milestone for me. As some of you may or may not know I'm not out full-time(as much as I hate that term). I still have to present in male mode for some social settings for now.  So anyway I have lost a great deal of weight before I started to transition and all of my male clothing didn't fit anymore so I donated some to charity or to my brothers. I only have a very limited selection of male attire. So I was in a situation where I needed to preset myself in more of  masculine role this weekend. I went  to put on my shorts and they don't fit anymore. My hips and butt have gotten wider and bigger. Not really fatter but bigger. I guess I didn't realize how much bigger until this weekend. I'm to the point where I can't really wear men's bottoms anymore because the don't fit me correctly and if i try to squeeze those hips and butt in I look disgusting.

So my wife and I went shopping to by some more shorts. When I went to try on some larger shorts they still didn't fit me the correct way. After several attempts at this we gave up and just found some masculine woman's shorts and called it a day.

This was a pretty startling wake up call for me that things are changing faster than I have anticipated and I'm just about to the point of not being able to present male anymore. I know that this is what I want, but I'm really still just getting used to the Idea of being a woman full-time and I need to get things in order.  My wife is telling me that the hormones are effecting my figure hips boob butt and it's pretty much no use in trying to hide it. It's just some situations I have been putting off an avoiding. Mainly my daughter's friends and her friends family's and her school. I still worried about the crap she my get because of me. I'm still very frightened about coming out to them because I don't want my daughter getting hurt or teased.

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

You may wish to inform the school, you and your wife will not tolerate any form of teasing or bullying.  You do not necessarily have to tell them anything more than that.

If anything happens after your warning, be ready to consult an attorney. 

And congratulations one the changes.  More than anything I have gotten in four years.

[Reagan]

We are luckily in a state that has a zero tolerance for bullying in school. That being said  This only applies to school.  I have talked to my daughter about that day when  things will change. she like me is nervous, but  understands that me doing this is for the best. She and I have come out to her best friend and her parents. They took it rather well. It's the ones that are a little more narrow minded  that have use concerned.

I just figured the changes would take longer. It will be 5 months on the 13th. I predict in the next two months I will no longer be able to present as her dad. It kinda saddens me a little. That part of my life will be over.  does that sound strange? I mean This is something I have wanted and needed all my life, and now that it's here I'm scared to death about it. 

[Kevin Peña]

I agree that you should let the school know what's up. You're daughter shouldn't be punished for something you do that isn't even wrong to begin with. I honestly think I should avoid these sort of posts, because I always get really jealous. I still have to wait just a little bit longer before I can start HRT. I have, however, worked my glutes to the point where I can crush walnuts with my butt. I'm strong, but not huge, so my butt really stands out. Little do people know, "lady butt" is among the most flattering insults I've ever heard.

You will have to come out to everyone at some point, though, so you might as well deal with it now. You could try to hide everything, but constantly having to switch presentation just sounds tiring to me.

[Reagan]

I agree that you should let the school know what's up. You're daughter shouldn't be punished for something you do that isn't even wrong to begin with. I honestly think I should avoid these sort of posts, because I always get really jealous. I still have to wait just a little bit longer before I can start HRT. I have, however, worked my glutes to the point where I can crush walnuts with my butt. I'm strong, but not huge, so my butt really stands out. Little do people know, "lady butt" is among the most flattering insults I've ever heard.

You will have to come out to everyone at some point, though, so you might as well deal with it now. You could try to hide everything, but constantly having to switch presentation just sounds tiring to me.

First of all sorry... My intention was not to cause jealously. I guess I'm a little insensitive about that. I just wanted to paint a clear picture. I'm just a little caught off guard. You are right I do need to just come out with it and let the chips fall where they may. I have been building myself up or that and getting prepared. Yes! it sucks big time having to switch sometimes. Really just to please a few people who frankly I could care less about in the long run.

[Kevin Peña]

First of all sorry... My intention was not to cause jealously. I guess I'm a little insensitive about that. I just wanted to paint a clear picture. I'm just a little caught off guard. You are right I do need to just come out with it and let the chips fall where they may. I have been building myself up or that and getting prepared. Yes! it sucks big time having to switch sometimes. Really just to please a few people who frankly I could care less about in the long run.

Well, I wasn't actually offended nor will I stop reading posts like yours; I'm just jealous, like when someone right next to you finds money in the street you didn't even see, is all, but that's my issue. Don't be sorry for my issue. Remember, don't go out of your way to please everybody. What makes you happy in life is priority #1.

[Brooke777]

Reagan, congrats on the changes. That is really great. I too am worried about how people will treat my son when I come out. I am not as close as you are since my face still looks really masculine. I am planning on calling a meeting with my son's principal, teacher, and school counselor. I intend on letting them know I am trans and will be going full time in the coming months. I want them to be aware of the situation so they will be in tune with the dynamics surrounding my son. He only has one good friend, and his parents are aware of my situation. They really don't care.

I too hate having to hide who I am. But like I said, I can't pass now anyway.

[suzifrommd]

t's just some situations I have been putting off an avoiding. Mainly my daughter's friends and her friends family's and her school. I still worried about the crap she my get because of me. I'm still very frightened about coming out to them because I don't want my daughter getting hurt or teased.

It will not be pleasant for her. Luckily it is not our job as parents to protect our kids from all unpleasantness. That is impossible. Despite our best efforts, there will be unkindness in their lives, whether or not they have trans parents. Our job is to make sure they learn from the experience. Hopefully your daughter will learn not to be as judgmental as the people who might tease her and will develop inner strength.

At least that's what I'm telling myself. I have a 15-year-old daughter I'm concerned about also.

[Beverly]

So this weekend marked a bit of a milestone for me. As some of you may or may not know I'm not out full-time(as much as I hate that term). I still have to present in male mode for some social settings for now.  So anyway I have lost a great deal of weight before I started to transition and all of my male clothing didn't fit anymore so I donated some to charity or to my brothers. I only have a very limited selection of male attire. So I was in a situation where I needed to preset myself in more of  masculine role this weekend. I went  to put on my shorts and they don't fit anymore. My hips and butt have gotten wider and bigger.

I went through a very similar situation - in fact I could cut and paste yours into my diary. I reduced my male wardrobe making it smaller and smaller until I was doing some DIY and put on an old pair of jeans that were way too small in the hips and way too big on the waist. That is when I realised that the time had come.

I threw out my last remaining male clothes and started writing letters to all my friends and relatives. Other the previous 12 months they knew something was up because I had grown my hair, plucked my eyebrows and so forth. The 3 stone weight loss and change of body shape was also a bit of a giveaway. The letters came as a relief for them because it emphasized the medical side of GID and explained what they had all been wondering about for 12 months.

My clothes outed me. It was for the best. Now I no longer have to hide my hips, waist or boobs or make awkward explanations about my eyebrows or hair..

My life became a lot simpler and an odd double life I was leading up to that point faded away. In some ways things are now odder because I have spent so long worrying about things that it became a habit. Now those thing no longer matter.

[Reagan]

Reagan, congrats on the changes. That is really great. I too am worried about how people will treat my son when I come out. I am not as close as you are since my face still looks really masculine. I am planning on calling a meeting with my son's principal, teacher, and school counselor. I intend on letting them know I am trans and will be going full time in the coming months. I want them to be aware of the situation so they will be in tune with the dynamics surrounding my son. He only has one good friend, and his parents are aware of my situation. They really don't care.

I too hate having to hide who I am. But like I said, I can't pass now anyway.

Brooke I sure hope that your meeting is met with understanding. I'm glad I'm not the only one with these fears. Thank you for your kind words.

It will not be pleasant for her. Luckily it is not our job as parents to protect our kids from all unpleasantness. That is impossible. Despite our best efforts, there will be unkindness in their lives, whether or not they have trans parents. Our job is to make sure they learn from the experience. Hopefully your daughter will learn not to be as judgmental as the people who might tease her and will develop inner strength.

At least that's what I'm telling myself. I have a 15-year-old daughter I'm concerned about also.

This is so true. I know I can't be there to always protect her. Believe me I would if I could. I guess why is because I don't want to be the cause of it, but guess in the grand scheme kids tease each other for all sorts of reasons. They will make them up if they have to.

The good thing is the she is very smart well adjusted kid with two loving parents. In this day and age that's a lot more than most of her classmates.

I went through a very similar situation - in fact I could cut and paste yours into my diary. I reduced my male wardrobe making it smaller and smaller until I was doing some DIY and put on an old pair of jeans that were way too small in the hips and way too big on the waist. That is when I realised that the time had come.

I threw out my last remaining male clothes and started writing letters to all my friends and relatives. Other the previous 12 months they knew something was up because I had grown my hair, plucked my eyebrows and so forth. The 3 stone weight loss and change of body shape was also a bit of a giveaway. The letters came as a relief for them because it emphasized the medical side of GID and explained what they had all been wondering about for 12 months.

My clothes outed me. It was for the best. Now I no longer have to hide my hips, waist or boobs or make awkward explanations about my eyebrows or hair..

My life became a lot simpler and an odd double life I was leading up to that point faded away. In some ways things are now odder because I have spent so long worrying about things that it became a habit. Now those thing no longer matter.

I was expecting the change just not prepared for it. It seems that everyone was saying that at 40 my changes would come more subtle at first. Well in my case five months. hehe
I'm pretty much out to my friends and family so I'm able to be myself around them. Which is good. My two brothers are my greatest supporters and I thought they would be the most unforgiving. They are truly my best friends.